PASSAGE 16

Thereare many things we humans tend to hold back on,

so
1. whether they are We repress a lot of our emotions,
considered 'good' or bad' ones.
2. Sometimes we hold back on expressing our love for fear of being misunderstood, or
perhapsthinking the timing is not 'right. Most commonly, we have been taught to hold
back on our negative'
emotions fear,
3. As a child I was often told to squelchanger,
those sorrow,
emotionspain,
that etc.
demonstrated 'weakness'. I
held back my tears in order to appear strong. I repressed my anger to be a good girl'
and loving.
4. Yet, I now realize that holding back anger or any other emotion affects negatively the
person who is holding back. The anger I refused to let out stayed locked up inside,
fermented, and gave rise to all kinds of poison. Frustrations and anger were withheld,
only toexplode when I'd had enough. This anger later had to be released through illness,
situations where the anger was unleashed at someone or something else (or at myself),
or through therapy.
5 What happens when you feel anger (consciously or sub-consciously) but want to hide it?
Whatever we hold back becomes a part of us and gets stored in our body as a tang1ble
manifestation in the form of headaches, tension, pain, illness, ulcers, cancer, arthritis,
back pain, and many other physical ailments.
e 0f course, we feel that by holding back on expressing our anger we are doing the rignt
thing and not hurting anyone. Yet, little do we know, the other person may need tohear
what we have t0 say, Just as much as we need to express it.
7. Of course, we need to learn how to express our anger or discontent without 'dumping'
on the other. We can express ourselves without destroying the other person's sense of
self-worth or attacking them emotionally, verbally, or physically.
8. Expressing our deepest feelings also applies to expressing feelings of love and appreciation.
How many times have we felt gratefulness towards another being, sometimes just for
their presence in our life, and failed to express it? That person may really need to hear
your words of praise to give them a boost in their own self-esteem. May be they are unaware
of what you so clearly see in them.
9. Ihave found that at times when Iexpressed feelings of gratitude and love to others, they
were surprised at the way I sawthem. Never assume that the other person knows how
much you appreciate them. If you think it and feel it, then say it.
10. Our rational mind has been well trained to dissect and analyse. It likes to hold back on
acting instinctively and instead question scientificallywhat is the 'right' action to take.
So, we've held our true selves back, and not expressed that inner inspiration to laugh,
cry, scream, give a hug, or say a kind word when our first feeling guided us to do so.
l1l. Whatever first thought or feeling comes to you is your intuition, or in other words, your
divine inspiration. Any other thoughts that follow, i.e. "may be I shouldn't say that", etc.,
are only your mind (ego) doubting and questioning, afraid of making a mistake'.
2. The best thing to do is to follow your first instinct, your inner guidance, which comes
as the first feeling or thought. That is your God-self.'The universal power of Love guides
us towards happiness, and that is why our first instinct is always the one that will bring
us true happiness and inner peace.
. We can choose to let go of the fear of being wrong, or appearing ridiculous, etc., and act on
0ur feelings. Betrue to yourself. Holding back is only postponing the truth and can harm
the other as well as ourselves. Holding back is postponing the freedom to be who we really
are loving, truthful children who desire to be happy and free from negativity.
14. Let go! Express your truth today! You and your world will be better for it.
Anita Desai
PASSAGES FOR NOTE-MAKING AND SUMMARIZING 119
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