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It can help you land new clients, hire the best employees and form new business relationships. Persuasive people
are likeable and influential because they put the needs of others above themselves. When you genuinely try to
understand another person’s background and motivation, you’ll be able to more effectively persuade him or her.
Use these nine practices to become a more influential and persuasive business leader:
1. Be curious.
The best persuaders are innately curious about the world around them and the people with whom they interact.
Learn what others need on a physical as well as emotional level and why. Always ask good questions and then
listen.
Begin open-ended discussions that start with “Tell me….” Demonstrate a genuine interest in others and get to
know their desires, dreams and goals. Once you understand a person’s position, you’ll be better equipped to
persuade him.
2. Listen effectively.
When talking with somone, always give that person your full attention. Look her in the eye and use her name
throughout the conversation. Let her to finish before you respond. When you're attentive, you send a message
that you value that person and her opinion. Over time, a growing reputation of trustworthiness will enable a
leader to influence decisions.
3. Be honest.
Your credibility and power of persuasion are heavily dependent on your ability to be honest in all situations.
Dishonesty can mislead others and it's usually destructive. One intentional lie or misrepresentation is often
enough to permanently damage a professional reputation. Though the truth may occasionally hurt, most people
respect and appreciate honest feedback.
4. Be confident.
Whether you’re speaking to a client, customer or colleague, show how much you believe in your business and
ideas. Remain calm to avoid an appearance of anxiety or self-doubt. Always be straightforward and clear when
you speak. If necessary, feign self-assurance. Clearly state your position and validate it with factual information.
5. Tell a story.
There's nothing quite as compelling or fascinating as a story well told. Even children love a good story. Stories
have the power to persuade others and influence them. People may pay attention differently when hearing a
narrative as opposed to just facts and figures.
If you want to demonstrate why an idea or strategy is important, then tell a well-crafted story. Your stories must
create connections between what the person is thinking, what he already believes and what you want him to
believe and do.
Next layer on your proof. Give an example using yourself or someone you know that adds credibility to your
point.
6. Address concerns.
All too often when a businessperson sets out to persuade, she wants to change another person's beliefs entirely.
But the persuader's ultimate goal should be to have the other person accept (or at least understand) her belief and
deal with any concerns.
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In a conversation, hone in on what matters most to the other person. Share opposing viewpoints and address
potential areas of frustration or confusion. If someone’s hesitant to agree with you, ask questions to find out why.
Don’t just tell him why you think you're right. Back up your ideas or statements with credible evidence.
Use brief pauses to emphasize points of significance. Avoid filler interjectives such as like, uh and you know.
Plan what you intend to say before you do so and then deliver it with conviction and confidence.
8. Show empathy.
To be a powerful persuader, understand a person’s pain and problems.Try to put yourself in the other person's
shoes. Doing this will help you better understand the other person's situation, feelings and motives. If you’ve had
a similar experience, share it. Showing empathy fosters connections and builds trust.
Learn what this person likes and dislikes. Familiarize yourself with his product, industry and anything else that
might give you a bit of an edge. Review this information before you meet. Whenever you find a commonality
with someone and share it, you become more memorable and stand out above all others.
Just about all entrepreneurs have experienced that warm, tingly feeling when they realize they’ve hatched a
brilliant idea that could change an industry, make a meaningful impact and land them a fortune Perhaps the only
thing standing between concept and cashing in is the clarity and persuasiveness with which this idea is pitched.
Sadly, this is no small obstacle.
In fact, roughly two-thirds of all pitched ideas that are rejected, are not dismissed because they are bad
ideas.They die on the vine because they were presented poorly. For entrepreneurs, a lack of persuasiveness when
rallying support for an idea can be as detrimental to a business as an embezzling CFO.
Here are some skills that should be in every entrepreneur’s tool belt:
1. Brevity is beautiful. Others will perceive greater conviction from you when you keep it short, sweet and
certain. When you drone on too long, it can start to sound like you’re trying to convince yourself.
2. Skip the filler. Filler language gives your presentation a half-baked, shooting-from-the-hip feel.To eliminate
filler, keep this basic equation in mind: The less certain you are about the next sentence out of your mouth, the
slower you should be speaking and the more pauses you should be using.
3. Winning ideas mean never having to say you’re sorry. It’s astonishing to me how often presenters apologize to
their audience: “Listen, I’m sure you’ve seen so many pitches on ideas like this, but,” or “I know you’re busy so
I won’t take up too much of your time,” or “let me just show you this sizzle reel; it’s not very long at all; I
promise.” Even the seemingly innocuous and ubiquitous, “let me just quickly walk you through this,” has
inherent apology laced through it. What you’re really conveying is “I know you find this boring, but if I get
through it quickly you’ll be bored for a shorter period of time.”
4. If you equivocate, you must evacuate (or go big or go home). In our quest not to sound too cocky and
arrogant, many businesspeople have allowed wishy-washy terms of equivocation to creep into their pitches. The
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most common are “sort of” and “kind of.” As an investor, if I’m holding the purse strings to your idea, I am not
persuaded and filled with confidence upon hearing you say, “Tthis is how we kind of make a difference,” or
“Our idea sort of solves this problem.” Be more declarative.
5. Visualize success. Help your bosses or colleagues envision how good the result can be if your suggested
course of action is implemented. You must paint a specific and visual picture of what success looks like thanks
to your idea.
6. Lead with your best stuff. You’re always playing a game of diminishing returns when it comes to capturing
the attention and engagement of your audience. Gradually building to the strongest aspects of your idea is a bad
strategy since some of your audience may have tuned out by that point.
7. Channel your Inner Bobby Fisher. An entrepreneur’s pitch should be approached like a game of chess. Not
only should you go in with your own strategy and game plan, but you also need to anticipate the other players’
likely moves. See if you can predict how the naysayers will express skepticism. Where will they try to punch
some holes in your idea?
Don’t be so enamored with your own idea that you can’t spot its potential flaws.When challenged in the meeting,
don’t get defensive. In fact validate that you’ve considered the very doubt you’re now asked to address: “You
know, I asked myself the same question ... and even applying a different model to the problem it still is a win.”
From the moment we were born, we have been weaned and schooled in the art and science of manipulation. So
much so, in fact, that we hardly recognize it anymore, both as targets and purveyors of manipulative influence.
It doesn’t take a cynic to admit that such ploys surround us at every turn, from a daily onslaught of advertising
messages to organizational politics to a looming performance review. Our lives run on some combination of
contingent consequence and tantalizing reward, the latter often simply being the avoidance of pain (obeying the
law to sidestep a tax audit, for example).
To escape this vicious circle of doomed cause and effect of a manipulative management style -- doomed,
because it inevitably leads to a downward spiral of disloyalty and mistrust -- you need to understand the
difference between manipulation and the eminently finer art of influence through persuasion.
Manipulation is, by definition, a form of persuasion, in that the avoidance of negative consequences does indeed
serve the needs of the target audience. “You get to keep your job” is one such tried-and-true example of a
manipulative management strategy, one that becomes an effective enough response to anyone bothering to ask,
“What’s in it for me?”
But the key difference between manipulation and persuasion, one that differentiates successful cultures from
fractured ones, is that manipulation is almost always a short-term strategy, destined to self-destruct unless even
stronger forms of manipulation are employed moving forward.
With manipulation, neither party, manipulator nor manipulated, benefit over the long term. Sure, in the short
term, a manipulative strategy may yield the kind of results, which, in the mind of the manipulator, justify the
means. But if that’s your modus operandi, consider changing it in favor of ethical influencing methods that build
respect for you instead of corroding it.
Manipulation is all about getting someone to do something for you, rather than influencing them because of
something that’s in it for them. The magic pill of the art of persuasion, conversely, is to get others to take action
for themselves, and in a direction that serves the needs of the persuader. In other words, a win-win proposition.
Where manipulation is inwardly focused, persuasion is an outward, connecting approach to exerting influence.
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The fundamental element and criterion of effective and ethical persuasion is trust. Manipulators are heard, but
persuaders are believed because they are trusted. Without trust, an audience only hears on one level: What are
the consequences of either compliance or apathy? With trust, an audience cares about what they hear, they give
the message every chance to be meaningful on multiple levels -- their own and the manager’s.
Trust is the mortar that builds teamwork, while manipulation is the jackhammer that tears it down.
Manipulation is destined to expose itself as such, and quickly breeds contempt when the reality of it kicks in.
People who are manipulated try to find ways to survive, sometimes to get even, and those goals rarely align with
the shared goals of the team. They react with fear, rather than with passion.
It's always preferable to persuade from within a win-win context, an approach that will pay dividends long after
the task or project window has passed.
Only with an understanding of the difference between influence through manipulation and influence through
persuasion can we then recognize it in our own experience, both on the receiving and dispensing end. Look out
for these things:
Is the incoming information (or outgoing if you are the sender of the data) based on solid reasoning, or the
fact that someone (perhaps you) is carrying a big metaphorical stick?
Are emotions being appealed to, and is that emotion fear or positive anticipation?
Are there alternatives on the table? To what degree is the recipient (perhaps you) being given latitude to
choose a path, and is the path of least resistance the optimal choice given the consequences?
What does the presenter gain from the logical choice? What does the other party gain? Who wins here, and at
what cost?
Do you trust the source of the information or choice being presented to you? Or if you are the sender, why
should you be trusted as such a source?
Once you made the shift from someone who influences through manipulation to one who influences through
persuasion, your leadership upside becomes unlimited. In the end, those who rely on manipulation often seem to
find themselves in that position.
Reprinted with permission from Executive Presence by Harrison Monarth. Copyright 2014. McGraw-Hill.
NOVEMBER 6, 2014
Preparing for a negotiation when a lot is on the line can elicit a tremendous amount of fear and negative
thinking.
This kind of thinking can mean the negotiation is lost before the salesperson has even started to prepare for it.
The first war to be won is the battle inside the salesperson against defeatist thoughts. By becoming clear on
desired outcomes, he or she has the greatest chance at negotiation success and making a sale.
Related: Be Calm, Flexible and Speak Up in a Negotiation, and Everyone Can Win
1. Eliminate anxiety.
The brain loves options. A salesperson should always have more than one significant opportunity in the
pipeline. This leads to increased confidence and less anxiety when negotiating.
Thus the salesperson doesn't feel desperate and can more confidently acquire new business by directing
negotiations to the point where the potential customer ends up selling the salesperson on why they should do
business together.
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2. Score a small yes or two.
Negotiate for what's easy first and never assume a potential customer will say yes to everything. Sometimes, the
prospect may offer to take a smaller order before going for bigger, more lucrative orders or contracts.
For the salesperson, getting a foot in the door can be the start of longer-term, more profitable partnership
opportunities in the future. A smaller win cann help prove the worth of the services being sold. It gives
the salesperson evidence of prior successful work to use in negotiations for bigger projects.
Even sharks become calm amid calm waters. So when negotiating, a salesperson should listen twice as much as
she speaks and repeat back to the customer what the client said and ask for agreement.
When a sales professional has the self-control to listen, she learns to speak the language of the customer and this
enables her to use this language in a way to outsmart the competition.
It changes the whole mindset and creates a communication space based more on agreement than desperate acts
of getting.
If the potential customer is not willing to come to agreement, then the sales professional can shock the customer
by removing the offer. Often what happens then is the potential customer rethinks a stance and returns to
negotiate with a higher level of respect for the salesperson’s offer. A lack of fear of rejection is respectable and
compelling.
5. Think existentially.
When the salesperson tries to put herself in the shoes of the customer and can see the big picture, a positive
psychological environment for negotiation is reached. She gains clarity about the potential customer's demands,
strengths and weaknesses and it's easier to move through the negotiation.
The potential customer feels connected to the negotiations because his viewpoint has been considered, which
goes a long way toward making a favorable impression and building trust.
She should listen and be smart, rational and calm. Strategically the sales professional must keep the focus off the
offer and create an arena of fairness in mediating discussions about the numbers in a mutually beneficial fashion
-- one where she does not settle for less than what is desired.
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If the sales professional can limit her sense of urgency about closing a sale and reflect indifference to the
customer by seeming relaxed or asking for a delay in the negotiations, she creates psychological tension in the
other party. This can result in an agreement.
Negotiation is purely a psychological strategy. Psychologically, a sales professional must be the master of his or
her own mind and emotions. She needs to enter the negotiation prepared, knowing the needs of the potential
customer through research, listening, spending time and paying attention.
When a sales professional goes into a negotiation well-informed, she can keep her expectations under control.
The most effective working relationships, which can then evolve into long-standing partnerships, are always
based in trust between partners. In this way negotiation is not about winning but rather about mediating for the
best outcome for all involved.
https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/232027
How do you get what you want while leaving the other party feeling like a winner too?
Negotiating, when done correctly, creates strong win-win situations for both parties. Unfortunately, most
ambitious professionals are stuck somewhere between emulating the stereotypical Hollywood idea of a hardball
business tycoon and flashbacks to childhood memories of being told to be patient and wait for rewards. As a
result, most professionals fear negotiating and treat it more as a guessing game or blackjack table.
You cannot advance your career or be a successful business owner if you avoid asking for precisely what you
want or enter into negotiations without having a plan in place. With that in mind, here are five ways that you can
quickly become a power negotiator:
Related: How to Increase Productivity, Motivation and Engagement From Your Top Employees
Once you identify your desired meeting goal, be prepared to ask for slightly more, allowing wiggle room for
your boss or client to ‘come down’ to your desired price. However, don’t be surprised if, using the next four tips,
you actually walk away with more than your initial goal.
I was a hotel sales manager in my early twenties. One of the most valuable lessons my Director of Sales taught
me was to offer what the competition cannot. As an example, my primary competition for large corporate
conventions were two hotels nearby. My property had over fifty suites while each of the other hotels had less
than fifteen. As a result, I would offer the meeting planners large quantities of complimentary upgrades for all of
the company VIPs. Even offering a slightly higher room rate, I almost always got the business simply because
the meeting planner jumped at the opportunity to look good by negotiating suites for company influencers. In the
end, it wasn’t about negotiating the lowest price, but the best deal for the company.
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Never accept less without gaining concessions
While you may not walk away with the exact dollar amount you envisioned, you can ensure that you leave with
your desired ‘value.’ If you’re seeking a 7% raise, but your boss informs you that the best the company can offer
is 5%, consider requesting the ability to work from home one day a week or an additional five paid vacation days
per year. Figure out an alternative option that is worth that 2% for you. Accepting less without gaining
something in return is the equivalent of stating that you are worth less than your initial ask.
When was the last time you negotiated for exactly what you wanted and walked away a winner? What tactics did
you use? Share your comments below.
A guide to practicing the art of give-and-take while boldly asking for what you truly want in four steps.
https://www.entrepreneur.com/article/233773
For many people, just the sound of the word negotiation makes them cringe. Some immediately break out in a
cold sweat at the thought of having to step up and negotiate for the things they want and need.
While some people have no problem advocating for others, when it comes to pushing for their own needs
(negotiating for a raise, obtaining the best price on a purchase or standing up for what they want in a
partnership), they stumble.
These four steps can help any person reframe the art of negotiation to achieve greater success and happiness in
all aspects of life and business:
1. Reframe thoughts about the meaning of the word negotiation.Instead of viewing it as the inevitable conflict
and adversity scenario, see negotiation for what it truly is: a great opportunity to collaborate, problem solve and
arrive at solutions that satisfy all parties involved.
Do this while paying close attention to what is being said, as well as what's not said. Listen for hidden
assumptions and unrealistic expectations and pay attention to any personality traits of the other party that may
affect the end result. Approach time at the negotiation table with a positive, engaged mind-set.
2. Be clear about desires. No hemming and hawing and “I don’t know” allowed. It turns out the old adage is true:
If you don’t ask, you don’t get. Research from Carnegie Mellon University suggests that a gender gap persists --
with men making more than women -- because women just don't ask for higher salaries. Even in personal
relationships, women often do not speak up about what they want directly and instead turn complaints inward to
negative self-talk or outward to friends in a complaint fest.
Being clear means coming prepared. Do research, expect possible adversity and prepare possible solutions.
Taking personal responsibility for success requires preparation.
No one can advocate better for a desired end than the person who's directly affected. Sure this may be scary at
the outset, but the confidence gained while standing up and speaking out will be worth it.
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3. Fake it till making it. Confidence starts from within, but sometimes a little behavior modification is required to
arrive at the right state of mind. Think of the athlete who's getting ready for the big game. Those who are
successful always include mental preparation as a huge part of the pregame plan. Start by visualizing the process
of negotiation with a positive result.
Remember negotiation is not the same as confrontation. Advocating for one's self is true leadership at its finest.
Always embrace communication with those on the other side of the table with confidence and a smile, knowing
that having clear goals and the right intention will lead to the best end result.
4. Start with the positive by building bridges and finding commonality. Whether seeking a raise or trying to have
needs met in other areas of life, use words like “we” and “us” versus “I” pronoun. Studies have shown that deals
are most often won using language that builds bridges and that demonstrates mutual benefit. Using communal
bridge-building language does not devalue a person's strengths; it actually extols them. The best deal is one in
which all parties are heard and their values honored.
https://www.nasp.com/article/55C9EF36-96A1/effective-persuasion-techniques.html
Everyone is susceptible to being persuaded; persuasion is a process whose objective is to change a person's
attitude and/or behavior towards an idea, event, person or an object.
An understanding of various effective persuasion techniques will not only help sales people to make sales and
meet their targets but it will also allow them to have an edge over competitors in the market. Here are some of
the best effective persuasion techniques to use in the field.
Many people buy products from the people they like, therefore a salesperson should establish rapport with
potential customers. You should establish areas of commonality and if you don't know what you have in
common, then you should ask questions about their criteria and be genuinely attentive to the prospective client.
You should keep smiling and strive to be likeable by being confident, enthusiastic, prompt and respectful. A
sales person should never argue with customers.
You should highlight the major benefits of using the product or service to the consumers. You should try to show
how it is a good idea to buy the product e.g. by aligning with their personal goals and criteria and showing them
how it is beneficial to buy the products from you. You should avoid trying to push for a sale, as it will make you
look desperate.
Every salesperson should expect to be objected to. This is normal in selling, therefore, a good understanding of
the products will help you to counter any objections and criticism raised. You should agree with the prospect's
objection and then illustrate how it is easily overcome by your product or service. Also, illustrate the advantages
of the product that will eliminate the prospects pain points and help satisfy their wants.
You should try to get the prospect to believe in something small or take a small action first. Once committed, the
prospect will most likely agree to a larger idea later. This technique employs the fact that people tend to behave
in a consistent manner, once they take a stand, they will act in ways consistent to the decision as a means of
defending and justifying it.
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The principle implies that when someone does something for us we feel obliged to return the favor. In selling, if
a sales person gives a gift to his prospects and clients it will endear them to him and might result in them making
big orders in future. The gifts don't have to be expensive but something useful and valuable e.g. they may be in
form of educational content. This technique is very effective for lead generation.
People tend to follow others (bandwagon effect) more so when they don't have sufficient information to make
the decision on their own. This technique will involve you telling your prospects that other people are using the
products and so they should as well e.g. by showing them logos of current customers and their testimonials. As
well you should refer to celebrity endorsements.
Scarcity
This involves letting people know that they stand to lose on a chance to get a special product or they may have to
wait longer for the product. You may use this technique to derive quick sales but you should be genuine about
the deadlines and quantity limitations.
You should use these persuasion techniques and as well try to learn more on human behavior and what triggers
people to make purchase decisions. The understanding will help you achieve sales success more comfortably.
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Alen Mayer> website | all articles
Alen Mayer helps sales leaders enlarge their sales circles and tap into their team members' individual strengths to
increase sales results. He works closely with companies to create a tailor-made, irresistible language for
introverted clients.
Whether you need to sharpen cold-calling techniques or sales strategies, Alen will improve your business. Please
visit his website at www.AlenMayer.com or call 647-427-1588 for more information about his powerful sales
training seminars, in-house workshops, and speaking engagements.
I live, eat and breath sales and combine over 20 years of experience in international sales and business
development with the persuasion, psychology and magic of NLP; by attending my training you're sure to enjoy
your time receiving the most advanced sales knowledge available!
I am a newly appointed President of the Sales Association Ontario Chapter and President of the International
Association of NLP Sales Professionals; one of the Top 25 Sales Influencers for 2012, published author of 4
sales titles, Certified NLP Trainer, Licensed Business Success Coach, and Certified Sales Professional.
Need a speaker for your group on advanced selling skills? Call me at (647) 427-1588.
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