“I am not what I think I am, and I am not what you think I am. I am what I think you think I am.

” –
Charles Horton Cooley

Author’s background
Charles Horton Cooley born on August 17, 1864 and died in May 7, 1929 is an American sociologist mainly
associated with the University of Michigan where he studied Economics and Sociology. He was the founding
member of the American Sociological Association in 1905. Best known for his concept of "Looking-Glass
Self".

Looking Glass Self

The term looking-glass self was created by American sociologist Charles Horton Cooley in 1902, and
introduced into his work Human Nature and the Social Order. It is described as our reflection of how we think
we appear to others.

Cooley proposed three steps to how interactions with others form self-identity:
1. We imagine how others see us.
2. We imagine how others assess/judge us.
3. We develop our self-views through these judgments.

1. We imagine how others see us

Individuals envision how they appear to others and form an initial self-concept based on their perception of how
they think others perceive them.

Involves:
Action
Appearance
Behavior
Explanation: during social interactions they reflect on these and they began to evaluate how they are presenting
themselves to others.

Highlights the role of SOCIAL INTERACTIONS and SELF IDENTITY

SOCIAL INTERACTION and SELF CONCEPT

Feedback and reactions received from others are important.
Explanation: These two have an important role in our self-concept because positive feedback can boost one’s
self-esteem while negative feedback can lead to self-doubt and insecurity.

Comparison and Imagination is evident.

Explanation: People compare themselves to social norms and standards practiced in their society.
Example: When you greet people or shake hands when you meet them. Then you evaluate your behaviors,
values and appearance that is more likely to compare it when others see you doing it. They like to reflect and do
it also.

This phase is an ongoing process and not a one-time event

Explanation: As individuals engage in various social interactions throughout their lives, their self-concept
continues to evolve based on new perceptions and feedback from different people and contexts.
CRITIQUES AND LIMITATIONS
It fails to acknowledge the influence of cultural norms and individual differences.
Explanation: Cultural norms dictate what is considered desirable or undesirable behavior, appearance, and traits.
People with different cultural backgrounds may have very different ideas about how they should be perceived.
And not everyone imagines the perceptions of others in the same way. Some individuals may be less influenced
by these norms.

It fails to acknowledge the influence of emotional biases.

Over emphasis on external perception and neglect the internal factors.

II. We imagine how others assess us.

In this second process Cooley said that we imagine how others assess or judge us. We don’t actually know how
others see or think about us because obviously we can’t read other peoples mind, but we imagine how they
judge us, we imagine how they think about us, about our opinion, outfit, our actions and everything that we do.
In result, the way we view ourselves, is often influenced by the feedback and judgments we receive from others.

Examples:
 Pumunta ka sa mall and usually wala ka naman paki sa mga tao but according to Cooley, may something
sa atin na nag urge na ayusin yung galaw natin, ayusin yung lakad natin, yun pagsasalita natin dahil
ayon nga dito sa pangalawang process ay na-imagine natin na may nasasabi sila kahit wala naman, or
naiisip natin na i-judge nila tayo kapag hindi tayo maayos maglakad, or yung outfit natin, diba bago tayo
umalis we always check ourselves muna kasi iniisip natin na baka sabihan ka nilang mataba, payat, or
something bad dahil sa suot mo.
 You’re preparing for a job interview at a reputable company for weeks. You’ve researched the company,
practiced answering common interview questions, and dressed professionally. As you walk into the
interview room and sit down with the interviewer, you can't help but imagine how the interviewer is
assessing you. You notice that the interviewer is making quick glances at your attire and grooming. You
hope that your choice of a neatly pressed suit and polished shoes makes a positive impression. You
wonder if the interviewer thinks you look professional and put-together.
 Nagrereport ka Infront of your classmates and you are prepared naman at alam mo lahat about dun sa
topic na nirereport mo but according to Cooley may something sa atin na parang sinasabi na ayusin natin
yung pagrereport natin na baka jina-judge na nila tayo because of how we discuss our topic na na-
iimagine natin because of their expression na may mali sa pagsasalita natin.

lll. Revise how we think about ourselves.

People imagine how others feel about them based on the judgments they make - And how individual responds to
those perceived judgments.

Based on INCORRECT and CORRECT PERCEPTION

For example: The teacher mark full of red inks of the student, because she thinks that the student has a potential.
How might student interpret and feel to this? The student will feel she/he is a failure or not intelligent. And the
student is acting the INCORRECT PERCEPTION of what the teacher beliefs. We all know that attitude can
influence our behavior, the student will put less effort instead of what teacher originally wanted.

Here comes the INTERACTION, it can also influence. If the student try to ask the teacher why it happen and
that point the teacher will able to explain in the additional of INTERACTION the student will able to revise
his/her perception.

The critical to this theory is that is Cooley believed that " We are not influenced by the opinion of others but
instead we are being influenced by what we imagine the opinion of other people to be."