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ANTISOCIAL BORDERLINE HISTRIONIC AND NARCISSISTIC DISORDERS » NARCISSISTIC PERSONALITY DISORDER Co-authored by:
Chloe Carmichael, PhD
Am I a Narcissist or an Empath? Licensed Clinical Psychologist

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Co-authors: Updated: Views:
5 October 24, 399,296
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Questions Overview

1. Your friend calls to say that they lost their job today. You feel:
A. Completely devastated. That must be awful for them.
B. You feel sad, but you’re able to keep it from ruining your day.
C. You might be a little bummed out, but you bounce back quickly.
D. Secretly glad, since you now feel superior to her in terms of employment.

2. Your sibling didn’t get into their dream college. How do you spend the rest of the day?
A. You research schools and cook their fave meal to cheer them up.
B. You go about your day but feel distracted thinking about them.
C. You feel for them, but you’re able to take your mind off it easily.
D. You attend work or school, and you don’t think about them at all.

3. Finish this sentence. The people in my life are:

A. At least as important as me—maybe even more important.
B. Just as important as I am.
C. As important as I am, but I still need to take care of myself first.
D. Not as important as I am.

4. Your coworker just earned a promotion. What’s your first thought?

A. “This is the most exciting news ever. I feel like I’m sharing in their joy!”
B. “Good for them!”
C. “I’m glad they’ve had some success, but I sort of wish it would have been me.”
D. “What? That’s totally undeserved. I should’ve been promoted instead.”

5. In relationships, I aim to:

A. Make the other person happy.
B. Make myself & the other person equally happy.
C. Make myself happy because we’re both responsible for our own emotions. Still though, I
want to treat them well.
D. Just make myself happy.

6. You just saw a video of someone falling on ice. How do you react?
A. I absolutely can’t watch these “fail” videos—it’s like I can feel their pain through the screen.
B. Ouch! Poor thing. I’m definitely not watching that a second time.
C. The way she flailed around was a little funny, but I hope she’s okay.
D. This is hilarious.

7. In your opinion, which of these things is the worst?

A. When my loved ones are in any kind of pain.
B. When I personally disappoint someone I love.
C. When either I or my loved ones receive bad news.
D. When something bad happens to me.

8. Do you feel like people come to you for help?

A. Constantly. I feel like I’m the main support system for just about everyone in my life.
B. Yes, they rely on me more than I rely on them.
C. Friends come to me for help as often as I ask them for help.
D. Not really.

9. A friend's just had a breakup. How do you respond?

A. “I’m so sorry. I’ll clear my schedule. Let’s stay in, eat junk food, and talk about how you
feel.”
B. “That’s awful. I’m just a phone call away if you need to chat!”
C. “That stinks. Who broke up with who?”
D. “I’m not surprised. I went on a great date this week. Want the details?”

10. Are you good with conflict?

A. I hate it. I only engage in conflict when I’m standing up for someone else.
B. I’m uncomfortable with conflict, but sometimes it’s necessary.
C. I don’t enjoy conflict at all, but I don’t seek it out either.
D. I have no issue with conflict. I’d rather get what I want than tiptoe around others’ feelings.

11. Your friend stains their dress right before the big dance. What do you do?
A. Offer to swap outfits with them. You just want them to have a great night.
B. Suggest they borrow something from your closet. You can fix this.
C. Tell them you’re sorry that they stained their dress, but assure them that no one will notice.
D. Nothing. That’s her problem.

12. Which answer best reflects your values and desires?

A. My worth is defined by my ability to help others.
B. I want to create joy in the lives of others and myself.
C. I’m focused on my own goals, but I never want to hurt other people in the process.
D. I want wealth, success, and personal happiness. It’s not my job to make other people
happy.

13. Pick a superpower:

A. The power to heal. I could keep everyone safe and healthy!
B. The power to fly. I can take to the sky when the world gets a little too stressful.
C. The power to camouflage. I want to blend in anywhere.
D. The power to run incredibly fast. I don’t want to wait around for anyone.

14. Your friend has posted some vaguely sad tweets on Twitter. What do you do next?
A. Message them immediately. I hope everything is okay!
B. Shoot them a supportive text before I go to bed.
C. Bring it up the next time I bump into them.
D. Nothing. That’s their business, not mine.

15. Your little sibling’s pet hamster died a week ago, and they’re still down in the dumps.
What do you say?
A. “I’m so, so sorry you’re hurting. I miss that little guy a lot, too.”
B. “Take it easy, okay? Healing takes time.”
C. “I promise things will get easier as time goes on.”
D. “Can’t you just get another hamster?”

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Qualities of Narcissists and Empaths

Narcissism and empathy are qualities that exist on a spectrum. Therefore, you can have
high levels of narcissism but not experience Narcissistic Personality Disorder (or, NPD). On the
other hand, “empath” is still a much-debated term. Though it isn’t a diagnosable condition in the
DSM-5, some research does suggest the existence of people with exceptional levels of
empathy, or “empaths.”

Qualities of Empaths:

Experience others’ emotions with them: Empaths feel extreme levels of empathy. Whether
you’ve had good news or bad news, an empath will feel your feelings, too. Because of this, they
might feel drained and vulnerable to low moods.

Emotionally intuitive: Empaths are capable of reading into behaviors and words and
determining how their friends feel at any given moment. Even if you think you’re keeping your
feelings hidden, an empath can see right through it.

Easily overwhelmed: Because empaths are susceptible to sudden emotional shifts, they might
get stressed easily. Most people don’t go through life absorbing the negative emotions of
people around them, but empaths do.

Sometimes struggle with boundaries: Because empaths feel so connected to other people’s
feelings, they’re more likely to put others’ needs first. This can leave them feeling tired,
stressed, and busy.

Very sensitive: Empaths experience big emotions—because of this, their feelings might get
hurt easily. And, because they’re intuitive, they notice everything, even subtle slights.

Qualities of Narcissists:

Overinflated sense of self-importance: Narcissists believe that they’re special and

exceptional. They never or rarely question this belief, so they go through life expecting others to
see and commend their “specialness” as well.

Sense of entitlement: Because narcissists believe they’re above other people, they expect
extra consideration, recognition, and leniency from others. A narcissist will feel that the rules
don’t apply to them.

Low levels of empathy: Narcissists have trouble understanding others’ emotions, desires, and
feelings. As a result of this, they rarely act in a way that is considerate of others’ happiness and
well-being.

Need for external validation: Narcissists have a constant need for compliments and praise.
As a result of this, they surround themselves with people who are willing to provide them with
this, even though they rarely reciprocate.

Rarely feel guilt or shame: Because narcissists struggle to feel empathy, they don’t typically
feel invested in others’ happiness. Because of this, they’re happy to lie, cheat, and manipulate
others without worry.

Excessive interest in high-status activities and people: Because narcissists believe that
they’re better than other people, they expect their status and relationships to reflect this. As a
result, they seek power, wealth, and high-value connections.

Dark empathy: Again, this term isn’t in the DSM-5. But it refers to individuals with high levels of
cognitive empathy and low levels of emotional empathy. These people feel very little desire to
help and support other people, even though they understand the feelings and experiences of
other people.

Want to learn more?

For more information about narcissism, empathy, and everything in between, read through
these resources below:

https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/9742-narcissistic-personality-disorder
https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-disorders/narcissistic-personality-disorder.htm
https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/narcissistic-personality-disorder/symptoms-
causes/syc-20366662
https://www.healthdirect.gov.au/narcissistic-personality-disorder-npd
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK556001/

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Categories » Health » Psychological Health » Psychological Disorders » Personality Disorders » Antisocial Borderline Histrionic and Narcissistic Disorders »
Narcissistic Personality Disorder
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