hi today i'm going to talk about

something that you are very much a

culprit of doing all right so here's the

situation

you are in a conversation you are

speaking to somebody in english

and what you're doing is

you are framing a sentence in your head

while the other person is talking to you

and you're not listening to him or her

you are busy constructing your own

sentence in your head

and

as your turn comes to speak what you do

is you blurt out word to word everything

that you constructed in your head right

then so what you're doing is you are

instead of paying attention

to what the other person is saying to

you

you are busy

framing your response in your mind this

is something that i have observed

in a lot of english learners

this is what they do

when they are in a conversation where

people are speaking in english they are

scared that

when their turn comes

they are going to fumble they're going

to make mistakes they're going to make a

mockery of themselves so instead of

taking that chance instead of

showing bravery and actually paying

attention to the conversation that's

going on what they do is they start

framing their sentence in their head

and that is what keeps them busy i'm not

going to lie i used to do that earlier

now i don't

this video is going to solve that

problem for you i have a few suggestions

for you

those suggestions are going to work for

you

because they worked for me and if you

follow my instructions

you can actually see yourself

getting out of this problem

little by little won't happen like this

won't happen like this it's going to

take you time but it will happen okay so

let's get started what to do and how to

take care of this see the idea behind

doing this video is

to make you aware that you are doing

this you are indulging into this habit

of framing your sentences in your head

preparing your responses and then

speaking them out word by word now this

is a b is that you're not alone

a lot of us do that when we are learning

but if it is normal and a lot of people

are doing it should we continue doing

this

and if we continue doing this will we

ever be able to improve

that is what i'm gonna talk about now so

my first suggestion is that it is okay

and it is not okay at the same time it

is okay because english is not your

mother tongue

english is your second language

right but it is not okay because it is

unnatural this is an unnatural way of

speaking

right

second it is too effortful

it puts you under stress

it puts you under pressure

right and third it brings about

inefficiency

in your language so these are the

reasons why it is not okay and now since

it is not okay we've got to do something

about it

let's talk about that now now since we

realize it is not okay

and we do realize that we are doing it

this is the time we do something about

it so first step towards solving a

problem is to acknowledge the problem

which you just did

you just did that you are doing this so

now we are scared we'll fumble we'll

make a fool of ourselves we'll not be

able to come up with words in a natural

way the way a sentence or a language

should be spoken

right this is what happens to us all

right we've acknowledged that there is a

problem we need to work on it now the

second step towards solving a problem is

that you realize that nothing can be

tackled

instantly we need to start working on

them

and

once we start working on them after

acknowledging them

they fade away percentage by percentage

every day we progress every day

our effort is going up

and

a problem is coming down effort rising

problem

falling first
be ready to handle it do not escape from

it escapism is worst

okay i know i have a problem i do not

have the guts to solve it no this way

you can never solve any of your life's

problems so first is acknowledging

second is realizing that i cannot be

perfect at it on day one

i need to work on it day by day so when

you're talking to somebody the goal of

communication is to exchange the ideas

you listen to them you respond you say

something they respond but when you're

dropping off from that conversation and

you're more in your head constructing

the sentences what you're doing is

you're not paying attention

you're not listening to what they have

to say so your focus should always be

on the meaning of the words

on the ideas that are being expressed in

the conversation be present

be more aware you have to be present in

the conversation

listening actively listening to what

they have to say to you

because a it is bad manners and b it is

not something that you can sustain

it's not possible that you go on like

this forever
so start working on something that is

sustainable something that actually can

work for you it will never ever put you

in a position where you feel confident

about your english

why because more than speaking you're

thinking in english now you may say

madam we understand what you're saying

makes sense but we are unable to do it

how to handle this i am just not able to

construct a

hold on

when you were thinking and making up a

sentence in your head were you not able

to make a sentence

you were the same person doing that so

if you can do that in your head why

can't you do that outside your head

why can you not do it on the fly

see i'm telling you the problem is only

with your fear

it is the same person it is the same you

who's making up that sentence in your

head so you already know the art of

construction of sentence

you're already doing it

it's just that you're not able to face

the fear

fear of fumbling fear of making mistakes

and that is why you rehearse

before you speak

so please understand you already know

the words you already know the

construction you already know the

grammar you already know your words

all you have to do is instead of

rehearsing here

start speaking

i understand initially it's not going to

be easy

but

if you start practicing

it will come naturally to you

i make videos in english english is not

my mother tongue it's obviously my

second language

how am i able to speak english on the

camera just like that

was i born this way i wasn't born this

way

i have had practice of my own i've taken

my time

and that is how i am being able to do it

you will also be able to do it i'll give

you my own example

i have already spoken of this example of

mine a few times earlier in few of my

videos

i used to be so scared of flying i never

enjoyed sitting in the planes i really

wanted to travel and that is why this

fear of flying was not consistent

with my idea of traveling the world

if you want to travel you have to fly

right

so now the thing was that i was in this

is in this

chicken and egg problem what to do

what to do

so i started working on my problem i

started working on it psychologically

because this is a psychological problem

yeah this is a psychological problem the

problem of fear of flying right i

started working on it

and trust me i see some great

improvement at it now

like i'm really far ahead of where i

used to be

can like

more or less confidently say that i am

no more scared of flying and i was

terribly bad at it like i've scratched

people's wrists sitting next to me

somebody who would sit next to me in the

seat on a plane i would just hold their

hand
and twist it like a mad woman that's how

i used to behave i've done that with my

friends i've done that with strangers

because i had no control over my

feelings and today

i'm very much okay i'm pretty far ahead

of where i used to be

it's all psychological yeah start

working on it and you can get over it

okay so

focus on the idea

thing you want to express

focus on the thought

take your time you don't have to rush

through your words take your time relax

okay

don't put unnecessary fear in your head

do not remind yourself that i am still a

learner i'm not good at this do not

remind yourself of this just tell

yourself

that no you can do this

you can do this you'll be able to handle

this just try it for once or twice just

try right so just

focus on the idea

remind yourself of what you want to

speak of the idea that you want to

deliver

and then let the words automatically

pour from your mouth okay let them come

out naturally

if there are pauses all right

no worries take your pauses

okay we are free we can wait

right do not put unnecessary pressure on

your mind it kills the efficiency of

your communication skills it may take

time give it time nobody is expecting

fast results take your time

but do not delay in putting in efforts

in the right direction and this is the

right direction let the words come out

automatically

okay so that was all in the video today

i've expressed everything i wanted to

um

i feel if you start working on it from

now

you will see some improvement happening

with you in the next one week i'm very

sure of that just try it try it for one

week and let me know in the comments if

it works for you okay also i have this

great spotify podcast of my own

please visit my podcast i'll leave the

link in the description of the video

go visit the podcast check my audios out

those audios are exclusive i do not

upload them anywhere else so you can

find some fun new content over there and

follow the podcast if you want to stay

in touch i upload one podcast every

thursday okay i'll see you soon again

please take care of yourself