Ki Tissa

The High Holidays feel like an eternity ago. Mid-Delta, Pre-Omicron, it’s all rather hazy in
my mind. But one moment stands out in my memory and has haunted me since. It’s
Neilah, the tail-end of Yom Kippur, and I enter the sanctuary of Romemu on the Upper
West Side of Manha an. A song is playing like a mantra, over and over again. It’s a
Berditchever tune, reworked and beau fully arranged by a musician named Joey
Newcomb. “You fall down, you get back up. You fall down, you get back up,” he sings.1
The song is hypno c. A video plays of a dancer, falling and rising, again and again. There
is a trampoline out of sight, catching the dancer and gently propelling him back up. It’s
all rather rhythmic and arres ng.

I have come back to that image and that tune ever since. It seems like an anthem for the
year that has followed. I have had to learn so many mes how to fall down gracefully,
how to get back up with strength, and also how to be a recep ve trampoline, catching
the falls of others and buoying them.

This week’s por on, Ki Tissa, o ers a medita on on this beau ful and di cult challenge
of descending and ascending.

***

Much excitement takes place in this week’s por on, which tells the story of the sin of the
Golden Calf. Anxious about Moses’ seemingly delayed return from the peak of Mount
Sinai, the people demand a replacement.

‫וַּיְַ֣רא הָעָ֔ם ּכִֽי־בֹׁשֵׁ֥ש מֹׁשֶ֖ה לֶָרֶ֣דת מִן־הָהָ֑ר וַּיִּקָהֵ֨ל הָעָ֜ם עַֽל־אַהֲֹר֗ן וַּיֹאמְרּ֤ו אֵלָיו֙ קּ֣ום ׀ עֲׂשֵה־לָ֣נּו‬
‫אֱֹלהִ֗ים אֲׁשֶ֤ר יֵֽלְכּו֙ לְפָנֵ֔ינּו ּכִי־זֶ֣ה ׀ מֹׁשֶ֣ה הָאִ֗יׁש אֲׁשֶ֤ר הֶֽעֱלָ֙נּו֙ מֵאֶֶ֣רץ מִצְַר֔יִם ֹל֥א יַָד֖עְנּו מֶה־הָ֥יָה‬
(‫א‬:‫לֹֽו׃ )שמות לב‬

When the people saw that Moses was so long in coming down from the
mountain, the people gathered against Aaron and said to him, “Come, make us
a god who shall go before us, for that man Moses, who brought us from the
land of Egypt—we do not know what has happened to him.” (Exodus 32:1)

1 h ps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EGUiuw sdI

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 Aaron the priest, brother of Moses, surprisingly obliges them, collects gold, and fashions
the idol.

ָ‫וַּיִּקַ֣ח מִּיָָד֗ם וַּיָ֤צַר אֹתֹו֙ ּבַחֶֶ֔רט וַּֽיַעֲׂשֵ֖הּו עֵ֣גֶל מַּסֵכָ֑ה וַּיֹ֣אמְרּ֔ו אֵּ֤לֶה אֱֹלהֶ֙יָ֙ יִׂשְָראֵ֔ל אֲׁשֶ֥ר הֶעֱלּ֖ו‬
(‫ד‬:‫מֵאֶֶ֥רץ מִצְָרֽיִם׃ )שמות לב‬

This he took from them and cast in a mold, and made it into a molten calf. And
they exclaimed, “This is your god, O Israel, who brought you out of the land of
Egypt!” (Ex. 32:4)

This traitorous act enrages the Divine, who turns to Moses–s ll atop the mountain
communing with It–and says: “‫“ ”לְֶ־ֵר֕ד ּכִ֚י ׁשִחֵ֣ת עַּמְָ֔ אֲׁשֶ֥ר הֶעֱלֵ֖יתָ מֵאֶֶ֥רץ מִצְָרֽיִם‬Go
down, for your people, whom you brought out of the land of Egypt, have acted basely”
(Ex. 32:7).

This phrase, “Go down,” lekh red, captures the a en on of the Sefat Emet. In what
sense should Moses descend? And why with such urgency?2

The Rebbe writes:

‫ הענין הוא כי גם‬.‫ מלאכי אלקים עולים ויורדים בו כו' ע"ש‬.‫במדרש על פסוק לך רד‬
‫הירידה הוא לימוד מדריגה של הצדיקים שע"י שבירידת ישראל מורידין עצמם עמהם‬
‫ ולכך‬.‫ ומיאן מרע"ה בזה‬.‫ הרי הוא אומר ואעשה אותך לגוי גדול‬.‫עי"ז מעלין אח"כ הכל‬
‫שיבר הלוחות כמ"ש במ"א שע"י שלא רצה להפריש עצמו מכלל ישראל ומסר חלקו‬
‫ וזה למד מרע"ה ממאמר לך רד‬.‫לצבור לכן היו אותיות פורחות כי בכלל הי' החטא ע"ש‬
‫הנ"ל וזכה וזיכה את הרבים והעלה כולם כמ"ש אח"ז לך עלה כו' אתה והעם כו' )שפת‬
(‫ כי תשא תרמ"א‬,‫אמת‬

In the midrash [in Shemot Rabbah 42:2], on the verse, “The LORD spoke to
Moses, “Go down [lekh red], for your people, whom you brought out of the
land of Egypt, have acted basely” [Exodus 23:7], [a connec on is made to the
verse in Genesis 28:12, regarding Jacob’s ladder dream:] “...and angels of God
were going up and down on it [yordim].” The idea is that descent too teaches
us about the level of the righteous ones who, when Israel “goes down” [morally
descends], lower themselves together with them. On account of this [joint
descent], all are then raised up.

Behold [God] said [to Moses] “[Now, let Me be, that My anger may blaze forth
against them and that I may destroy them,] and make of you a great na on.”
Moses refused this [o er], and therefore sha ered the Tablets, as [I’ve wri en]
in a di erent place [Sefat Emet, Ki Tissa 1877]. Because he did not want to
separate himself from the collec ve of Israel, he [Moses] sacri ced his por on
to the people. For this reason the le ers ew up, since the sin was with the

2 Some translate “‫ ”לך רד‬as “Hurry, go” or “Get down!,” making that urgency even more explicit.

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 collec ve. Moses our teacher, of blessed memory, learned this from [the
words] “go down.” He increased his own merit, and that of the masses, and
raised them all. As it says a erward, “Then the LORD said to Moses, “Go up
[lech aleh], you and the people that you have brought up [alita] from the land
of Egypt, [to the land of which I swore to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, saying, ‘To
your o spring will I give it’]” [Exodus 33:1]. (Sefat Emet, Ki Tissa, 1881)

Here is the midrash that the Sefat Emet alludes to at the start of his commentary:

‫ וְכֵן‬,ְָ‫ וְעָלִיתָ אַּתָה וְאַהֲֹרן עִּמ‬:(‫ כד‬,‫ אֶתְמֹול אָמְַרּתָ לִי )שמות יט‬,‫ ִרּבֹון הָעֹולָם‬,‫ אָמַר לֹו‬,‫לְֶ ֵרד‬
‫ אָמַר לֹו ֹלא ּבִׁשְבִיל‬,‫ לְֶ ֵרד‬:‫ וְכָאן אַּתָה אֹומֵר‬,'‫ וְאֶל מׁשֶה אָמַר עֲלֵה אֶל ה‬:(‫ א‬,‫)שמות כד‬
:(‫ יב‬,‫ אָמְַרּתִי לַּזֵָקן ׁשֶּלָהֶם )בראשית כח‬,‫ּכְבֹוְדָ אַּתָה עֹולֶה לְכָאן אֶּלָא ּבִׁשְבִיל ּכְבֹוד ּבָנַי‬
‫ ּכְׁשֶּיִהְיּו ּבָנֶיָ צַּדִיִקים‬,‫ אֶּלָא ּכְָ אָמְַרּתִי לֹו‬,‫ מַהּו ּבֹו‬,‫וְהִּנֵה מַלְאֲכֵי אֱֹלהִים עֹלִים וְיְֹרִדים ּבֹו‬
‫ הֵם‬,‫ ּוכְׁשֶהֵם יֹוְרִדים‬,‫ וְכֵן ׁשְלּוחֵיהֶם מִתְעַּלִים עִּמָהֶם‬,‫הֵם מִתְרֹומְמִים ּבָעֹולָם וְעֹולִים‬
‫ אַּתָה‬,‫ אָמַר לֹו הֹואִיל וְחָטְאּו‬,ְָ‫ ּכִי ׁשִחֵת עַּמ‬:(‫ ז‬,‫ )שמות לב‬,‫ לָּמָה‬,‫ לְֶ ֵרד‬.‫ּוׁשְלּוחֵיהֶם ּבִיִריָדה‬
(‫ב‬:‫ )שמות רבה מב‬.‫וָהֵם ּבִיִריָדה‬

“Go down” [Ex. 32:7]. [Moses] said [to God], “Yesterday you told me ‘come up
together with Aaron’ (Ex. 19:24) and also ‘Come up to the Lord’ (Ex. 24:1). But
now You are saying, ‘Go down’. [How am I to make sense of this?].” [The Divine]
said to him, “It is not for your glory that you came up here [to Sinai], but for the
glory of My children [Israel]. I told their elder [Jacob, who dreamed of a ladder,
that] ‘angels [or messengers] of God were going up and down on it’ (Genesis
28:12). What is the meaning of ‘it’ [the ladder]? I said to him [Jacob]: When
your children are righteous, they will be elevated in the world and will li it.
Similarly, their messengers [or leaders] will be li ed with them. But when they
fall, both they and their leaders will be in the descent. ‘Go down’--Why? ‘For
your people…have acted basely’ (Ex. 32:7). [God said], Since [your people] have
sinned, you and they are [together] in the descent. (Shemot Rabbah 42:2)

The midrash imagines Moses being cast o the mountain, literally and gura vely “going
down” with his errant people. Their sin is his sin, and so he must su er their fate. “Lekh
red” means, “Join your people in their debasement.”

The Sefat Emet reads this story rather di erently though. He a ributes heroic agency to
Moses, sugges ng that it was Moses himself who chose to align with his people even, or
especially, in their sin. He elected to be a leader with his people, even when his people
seemingly rejected his leadership. He cast his lot with them, come what may. This self-
sacri cing willingness to “go down” tes es to Moses’ greatness as a leader and ally.
And it facilitates the rise of his people once again.

‫הענין הוא כי גם הירידה הוא לימוד מדריגה של הצדיקים שע"י שבירידת ישראל מורידין‬
(‫ כי תשא תרמ"א‬,‫ )שפת אמת‬.‫עצמם עמהם עי"ז מעלין אח"כ הכל‬

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 The idea is that descent too teaches us about the level of the righteous ones
who, when Israel “goes down” [morally descends], lower themselves together
with them. On account of this [joint descent], all are then raised up. (Sefat
Emet, Ki Tissa 1881)

The Rebbe here is drawing on the Chasidic concept of “‫”ירידה לצורך עליה‬, “Descending
in order to ascend.” Individuals fall so that they might rise. We fall away from God. We
fall away from ourselves, from one another, from the universe. But on the other side of
our descent is an ascent. Rock bo om means there is only one way to go: up.

Rebbe Nachman of Breslov says, for example:

‫ כי הירידה היא‬,‫כשצריך האדם לעלות מדרגא לדרגא צריך שיהיה לו ירידה קודם העליה‬
,'‫ ומזה יכול כל אדם להבין כמה הוא צריך להתחזק בעבודת ה‬.‫תכלית העליה‬
‫ כי אם יתאמץ ויתחזק‬.‫ולא יפול לעולם בדעתו מכל הנפילות והירידות שבעולם‬
‫ יזכה‬,‫לבלי להסתכל על זה בשום אופן שבעולם אפילו אם יעבור עליו מה‬
.‫ כי הירידה היא תכלית העליה‬,‫לבסוף שיתהפכו כל הירידות לעליות גדולות‬
(‫)משיבת נפש כ"ב‬

When the me comes for a person to rise from one level to the next, he must
rst experience a fall. The whole purpose of the fall is to prepare for the ascent.
Try to understand this and you will realize how determined you must be in
order to serve the Ine able. No ma er how far you fall, never allow yourself to
be discouraged. Remain rm and resolute and pay no a en on to the fall at all,
because in the end it will be transformed into a great ascent. This is its whole
purpose. (Mishivat Nafesh 22)

The Sefat Emet extends the fall and rise of individuals to communi es. We can fall as
groups, maybe even as whole socie es, and leaders are confronted with a choice in the
face of this unraveling: Stand outside the fray or join it. Try to steer people through
darkness from a remove in the light, or enter the muck together with them. Stand with
them. Feel their pain. Empathize with the worn-out and broken-hearted. Be with them.
Be of them.

Moses took the la er path.

‫ ולכך שיבר הלוחות כמ"ש‬.‫ ומיאן מרע"ה בזה‬.‫הרי הוא אומר ואעשה אותך לגוי גדול‬
‫במ"א שע"י שלא רצה להפריש עצמו מכלל ישראל ומסר חלקו לצבור‬

Behold [God] said [to Moses] “[Now, let Me be, that My anger may blaze forth
against them and that I may destroy them,] and make of you a great na on.”
Moses refused this [o er], and therefore sha ered the Tablets, as [I’ve wri en]
in a di erent place [Sefat Emet, Ki Tissa 1877]. Because he did not want to

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 separate himself from the collec ve of Israel, he [Moses] sacri ced his por on
to the people.

O ered an o -ramp by God–a way to divest from his people, to stay far away from their
downfall–Moses declined. He chose instead “lekh red,” to go down with them. He
stepped away from his secure perch on high and returned to the tumultuous mess of the
masses. He sha ered his holy communion with God to embrace his rela onship to
impious people. He did not like what they were doing at the foot of the mountain. He
did not come to sanc on their idolatry. He came to bear witness and to be present with
a bere people.

This act of radical solidarity is itself redeeming, says the Sefat Emet. Through the
empathy, trust, and love entailed in fellowship, rela onships can be repaired, wounds
can be healed, worlds can be brought back into balance. Those who fall together can rise
together.

‫וזה למד מרע"ה ממאמר לך רד הנ"ל וזכה וזיכה את הרבים והעלה כולם כמ"ש אח"ז לך‬
‫'עלה כו' אתה והעם כו‬

Moses our teacher, of blessed memory, learned this from [the words] “go
down.” He increased his own merit, and that of the masses, and raised them
all. As it says a erward, “Then the Holy One said to Moses, “Go up [lekh aleh],
you and the people that you have brought up [alita] from the land of Egypt, [to
the land of which I swore to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, saying, ‘To your
o spring will I give it’]” [Exodus 33:1].

On the other side of “lekh red,” of collec ve descent, lies “lekh aleh,” collec ve ascent.
Moses, who chose to bind himself to his struggling people, could also pull them up with
him. Such is the immense, intense power of solidarity.

***

Proverbs 24:16 states:

…‫ּכִי ׁשֶבַע יִּפֹול צַּדִיק וָָקם‬

Seven mes the righteous one falls and gets up…

Moses’s ac ons demonstrate not only the power of ge ng up but also the
“righteousness” of falling down. When we are bu eted and bu eted again, the Divine
invites us to “lekh red,” to gracefully accept defeat, feel into our lows, and perhaps pray
for accompaniment on the journey through. This tune might help: h ps://
www.youtube.com/watch?v=EGUiuw sdI.

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 Bifnim/Personal Re ec ons
1. The opening midrash cites Jacob’s ladder as a place where “messengers of God
go up and down.” What might it mean to be a messenger who goes up or down
with another? Have you ever served as that emissary for another? Has someone
ever played that role for you? When, how, why or why not?
2. Rebbe Nachman teaches, “No ma er how far you fall, never allow yourself to be
discouraged. Remain rm and resolute and pay no a en on to the fall at all,
because in the end it will be transformed into a great ascent. This is its whole
purpose.” How do you respond to this teaching–posi vely, nega vely, or
something else? Why?
3. Consider the choices we discussed when confronted with the kind of collec ve
descent Moses faced: Stand outside of the fray or join it. Try to steer people
through darkness from a remove in the light or enter the muck together with
them. In your experience, do you nd you have a pull or tendency to one or the
other of these op ons? If so, why? Is that natural ins nct aligned with how you’d
like to act? If not, what do you sense might block you from ac ng on your
inten on?

Avodah/Prac ce–Rabbi Myriam Klotz

In this week’s teaching we are o ered two prac ce instruc ons that seem to pulsate
together like the expansion and contrac on of the heart: lekh red, and lekh aleh. Go
down! Rise up! It is not one or the other ac on that is solely the means by which
spiritual growth occurs here, perhaps. Maybe it is rather in the capacity to descend, or
to elevate, like the angels of Jacob’s ladder, depending on what is needed at that me
and in that context in order to sustain empathic connec on with oneself and others.

This week’s prac ce is o ered in order to support your capacity to sustain and cul vate
empathic connec on with yourself and others in mes of su ering, in order to root
yourself in your most expansive and responsive states of awareness. For many of us, we
might have an aversion to actually feeling empathy for the su ering of others. Especially
if it will poten ally take us “down a few notches” if we bear to look at that pain and let it
in beyond an intellectual knowing. I have had the experience of wan ng to look away
when I pass someone on the street who is asking for food or money. I some mes feel
“compassion fa gue” and realize I am rather numb inside, even around those I most
dearly love. Maybe you have these kinds of experiences too, some mes.

This week’s prac ce is to allow just a li le bit more of our hearts and minds to touch the
su ering inside, and in the world around us. As we learn to descend into the places
within where our bodies, our hearts and minds register su ering, we can learn the
alchemy, over me, of resilience. We can learn to source ourselves in the libera ng
awareness of our interdependence, our shared humanity, rather than the “egoic trance”
of our separa on that o en brings with it the need to prove ourselves be er, stronger
than, higher than another or others.

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 We might learn how be er to reside in the kind of wise compassion that accompanies
the su ering which has no quick x or ashy transcendence, which is found in the sacred
equity of our shared humanity, broken and whole at once.

So, for this prac ce, we start slowly to begin to take in the su ering around us with an
inbreath, and to let it back out with our outbreath. You’ll want to nd a comfortable
place to sit quietly for ten minutes. For this prac ce you might want to set a mer and
use this structured container of me to support you.

Begin by quietly no cing your breath owing into your body, and leaving you. Bring your
a en on to the sensa ons in the body, to the subtle rising and falling of the chest and
belly as you breathe in and out.

A er several breaths, allow yourself to bring to mind an image of someone or something

that is in pain or su ering. It might be an animal, or a stranger, or someone close to you.
It might be your own self.

No ce any reac ons you might be having right now as you read these words. You may
feel yourself subtly backing away from them. This is natural. It’s ok. It’s why we want to
prac ce right in this uncomfortable place, in order to help condi on ourselves to look
away less, to pull away less, in our minds, our hearts, with our bodies. This is a spiritual
prac ce of leaving comfort zones and gradually building our spiritual power zones of
capacity to be with pain and to extend kindness right where it is needed. You might call
this a “Lekh Red!” prac ce of descent.

Return to allowing your mind to surface a memory or image of some area of su ering in
this world. A friend or family member, a pet, perhaps someone you don’t know but have
been around or have seen on a screen. Allow the image to ow into your heart with the
inbreath. Like the wave of an ocean reaching the shore, receive this image and no ce
whatever feelings and sensa ons arise.

As you exhale, imagine the waves returning back out to sea. Watch that image leave
with the breath, and send it out with kindness, peace, or compassion. Imagine it being
absorbed by the ocean, as your breath is absorbed by the atmosphere, where our
shared breath lives between and through us.

Con nue to welcome into your heart the images of others or yourself in moments of
su ering. Allow your heart and body to feel whatever it is you feel, and as you breathe
out, send these images back out with a blessing of loving kindness. You might want to
invite seven images or moments into your heart, descending into the textures of feeling
and awareness they evoke, one by one. Prac ce releasing them into that oceanic breath
in which connec on and kindness ow. You can work with fewer or more images of
course. I suggest seven because it connects us to the verse from Proverbs 24:16, as
brought in our teaching this week:

7|S e f a t E m e t o n t h e P a r s h a h — R a b b i D r. E r i n L e i b S m o k l e r
© Institute for Jewish Spirituality 2021
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 …‫ּכִי ׁשֶבַע יִּפֹול צַּדִיק וָָקם‬
Seven mes the righteous one falls and gets up…

When you no ce your mind wandering or perhaps that a numbness or fogginess or

other di culty focusing on this prac ce has overtaken you, be gentle with yourself. This
just might be an essen al part of the learning here, that is, learning to recognize and
touch into even those moments when the mind has gone numb, the heart has shut
down…So, simply no ce, and when you do, return to your breath descending and
ascending through your body.

This prac ce (informed by the Tibetan Buddhist prac ce of tonglen, led here by Tibetan
Buddhist teacher Pema Chodron) invites us to hold the brokenness and the su ering–
that is part of our shared humanity–in a spacious container of loving awareness and a
courageous, so heart. It is a prac ce of cul va ng awareness and presence that is able
to fall and rise up, to contract and expand, to reside in fullness and in emp ness. May it
serve you in your journey of descent for the sake of ascent, of cul va ng a so and
empathic heart for the sake of resilience, wise perspec ve and the capacity to tolerate
the sacred brokenness that empathy makes whole.

8|S e f a t E m e t o n t h e P a r s h a h — R a b b i D r. E r i n L e i b S m o k l e r
© Institute for Jewish Spirituality 2021
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