What Is Love?

written by

Yoong Ahn & David Choi

Address 75 3rd Ave

Phone 6506023700/6462495664
E-mail ya2234/jc10184@nyu.edu
INT. CLASSROOM - DAY
JUN (18, a well-adjust studious but down-to-earth college
freshman) stares at CELINE (19, confident and sociable).
Though Jun lacks emotion, Celine seems to flirt with her
gaze.
CELINE
So... feel anything yet?
JUN
Nope.

The tension is broken and Celine, looking frustrated, relaxes

back into her seat.
CELINE
Ah, bullshit. I got like anime
level eyes. I've seen guys walk
into traffic staring at me.
(Celine mimics a car and
human crashing with her
fingers)
JUN
Huh. Sounds like a morbid asset.
CELINE
Yeah, too many have died for these
gems. Wait, what's the issue then.
Gay, asexual?
JUN
No, and probably not? I don't know.
No one has... popped. In
classrooms, online, TV, movies,
whatever. No one has made me
feel... you know.
CELINE
Never had a girlfriend?
JUN
No.
CELINE
Crush?
JUN
Nope.
CELINE
A little... sneaky link?
 2.

JUN
What?
CELINE
Holy crap! Jun's a psychopath. This
is insane! You lack love!
JUN
Ok look, this is not that big of a
deal.
(Jun takes his phone out
of his pocket)
Alright, Kevin needs some help with
homework. Let's go.
Jun takes his bag from behind his chair.
CELINE
No no no, we're not just blowing
past this.
(Celine stands, walks past
Jun, and turns around)
I have an idea, follow me.

INT. CAFE - DAY

The door closes. Jun and Celine is sitting at a cafe while
Jun seems confused.
JUN
What are we doing at a cafe?

CELINE
(sips coffee)
Jun, you are a lucky little love
lacking lethargic lassie.
JUN
Lethargic?!
CELINE
Today, I invite you to a mock date,
with yours truly.
JUN
What?
CELINE
Okay, here's what I think. You
clearly don't know shit about
relationships.
(MORE)
 3.
CELINE (CONT'D)
So, in order to teach you what love
entails, I'm gonna take you on the
most beautiful date of your life...
(smiles)
The only, date of your life.
Jun stares at Celine and gets up from his seat. Celine hooks
her foot around his chair's leg and pulls him back in, and
Jun falls back into his seat.
CELINE (CONT'D)
Come on, you seriously wanna go
back instead of having some fun
with 누나?
Jun annoyingly stares at Celine. Celine sighs.
CELINE (CONT'D)
Look, the conventions of a date,
the experience of doing fun
activities one on one. This is all
foreign to you. You might as well
experience it now while someone is
giving you a chance.
JUN
(thinks about it)
Fine. So why are we in a cafe?
CELINE
Well, this is where a lot of first
dates happen. You can see your
partner's face in clear lighting,
you can have a friend spotting you
from another table,
(Jun looks around)
And unlikely to have a spiked
drink.
Jun is typing something on his phone, not paying attention.
CELINE (CONT'D)
Hey! Put your phone away! Talk.
Connect.
(grabs Jun's phone and
puts it on the table)
Okay, so you've never liked anyone,
but has anyone liked you before?
JUN
Well... I guess.
 4.

CELINE
And I'm assuming you turned her
down. Was she hot?
Jun takes his phone and shows her pictures. Celine takes a
look.
CELINE (CONT'D)
(surprised)
No way.
JUN
(shrugs)
Eh.
CELINE
She must've been a bitch!
JUN
Known as the nicest girl in school.
CELINE
Oh.
JUN
I don't regret saying no, but I
still feel sorry for her. She
wasted her time and money and it
amounted to nothing. How is that
not frowned upon.
CELINE
Yes, it's cringe and painful, but
it's also sweet. You just
experienced one of the most
cathartic moments of her life.
Can't you see the beauty in that?
JUN
I see irrationality. Nothing other
than 'He might be cool' prompted
her to like me.
CELINE
Well, on the subject of
irrationality and wasting time and
money, we're moving to the next
location.
(gets up and leaves)
JUN
Wait, just let me finish my drink.
Celine grabs his arm and drags him out of the frame.
 5.

INT. BOWLING ALLEY - DAY

Bowling ball hits the pins. Celine returns to the seat.
JUN
This can not be a dating spot.
CELINE
It is a bit old school, but
competition is a great way to see
your potential partner's true
colors.
JUN
Well, I'm gonna beat the shit outta
you with my balls.
(realizes what he said)
CELINE
First of all, gross. Second of all,
there is no way you're beating me,
especially since...
(pulls out a soju bottle)
We're gonna be playing hardcore
JUN
Unbelievable.
CUT TO:

INT. BOWLING ALLEY - MOMENTS LATER

Jun throws a gutter ball. He is standing while Celine is
sitting on the couch. Two cups with straws are placed on the
table.
JUN
You look at anything in nature,
they say "fuck you" to love. It's
all about pheromones, reproduction,
and spores. No one gives a crap
about paying for dinner except us
humans.
CELINE
You ever seen sleepy puppies fall
into the arms of their mommy?
That's love, you can't tell me
otherwise.
 6.

JUN
The praying mantis. After they
mate, the female eats the male's
head. All the time. Every time.
CELINE
As bad as it sounds, it's their
issue. I'm talking about you over
here. Look, if it helps, love isn't
about logic or reason. It's
mindless fun, like gaming. But to
maintain it, it takes effort, you
have to keep on playing to win.
JUN
(sits next to her)
I'm getting tired. Where we off to
next?
CELINE
I have a friend who owes me a
favor. You'll love it.

INT. SMALL THEATER - NIGHT

The screen shows the kiss scene of "Cyberpunk: Edgerunners
Episode 4." Jun is entranced with the scene. Tired Celine is
sleeping on his shoulder. Jun turns his head to see her, and
turns back to the screen.

EXT. OUTSIDE OF CELINE'S HOME - NIGHT

It has gotten dark outside and crickets are chirping. Celine
and Jun walks back to her place.
CELINE
You have to admit that show was
great.
JUN
(smiles)
Yeah, it was pretty good.
CELINE
Alright. What about the rest of our
mock date?
 7.

JUN
Well, the coffee was hella
expensive, I'm sweating my ass off
from the miles we had to walk, and
I lost at bowling only because
someone peer-pressured me into
drinking. But... yeah, I'll give it
to you, it was fun.
They arrive to her apartment and stops walking.
Jun and Celine turns toward each other and smiles.
CELINE
Well... There we go! Fake date
over.
She puts her hand out and they shake hands while she smiles.
They pause as they look at each other. Jun closes his eyes as
he begins to lean in for a kiss.
Celine's phone rings and she faces down. As Jun continues to
lean forward, he eventually kisses on the top of her head.
Jun opens his eyes and Celine immediately looks up. They
revert back to normal positions. Celine awkwardly chuckles
and Jun chuckles back. They awkwardly stand.
CUT TO BLACK.

"WHAT IS LOVE?"