OK, are you sitting tight and ready to listen? Yes? Good, because I’ve got plenty to say!

What makes me angry?

Plenty! Oh, there’s lots of stuff that gets on my nerves, believe you me! Right, here goes!
One thing I can’t stand is open doors. That’s right – open doors, when the heating is on, that is!
Shops are the worst offenders. When I go into a shop and the
door is open and the heating is on, it drives me crazy! So I act!
First, I close the door. Second, I speak! I ask to see the
manager. I tell the manager that I am an eco-warrior, out to
protect the environment. They always give me a funny look,
the imbeciles! I give them a piece of my mind: ‘Just close the door, for Heaven’s
sake! Or turn the heating off….’ Close it, for crying out loud!
Another thing I detest is cheeky teenagers. They really get my back up. They sit
on swings in the playground and those are for young children! I wave my walking stick at them and I shout: ‘Hoy, you
lot! Scram, get lost! You should be at home playing your stupid computer games! Clear off!’
Do you know what they do? They laugh and they say, ‘Old Granny Grumpy is on the warpath
again!’ Pah, there is no respect for the elderly nowadays. How their poor teachers cope with
them, I don’t know! I would give them all a good old-fashioned clip around the ear.
Did I mention teachers? Teachers nowadays are not what they were! They
wear jeans, can you believe it? Jeans for school! In my day, teachers wore smart suits. And all they do
is preach about the environment! They should teach the three Rs: reading, writing and ‘rithmetic!
But my pet hate is complainers! People who whinge all the time, oh, they really wind me up! They
need to get a life! Go home, shut up!
Well, I have to stop now, dears, because there’s somebody parking their car outside my house. I’m off to tell them to
shove off somewhere else. Oh, it’s our Linda, we’ll have a nice cuppa and a chinwag! Still, I don’t like her parking
there. It blocks my view when someone parks there and I can’t really have that, can I?

Answer TRUE or FALSE. Correct the false sentences: Answer the questions in full sentences.

1) Mrs Angry hasn’t got much to say.
2) She is quite happy for doors to be open when the
heating is on.
3) She asks to see the manager of shops whose doors
are open when the heating is on.
4) She tells the managers she is on a quest to save the
planet.
5) When she sees groups of teenagers in the park, she
waves at them and wishes them a good day.
6) The teenagers always treat Mrs Angry with respect.
7) If it was up to her, Mrs Angry would hit the
teenagers round the ears.
a) Highlight all the phrases which mean ‘to make
someone angry’.
b) What does Mrs Angry want people to do before
she starts talking?
c) What is it about open doors that she cannot
stand?
d) What does she do in shops with open doors and
the heating on?
e) How do managers treat her when she claims to be
an eco-warrior?
f) What do teenagers do that she doesn’t like?
g) What does she advise the teenagers to do?

8) She is shocked by – according to her - the poor
standards of teachers these days.
9) She is OK with people who complain a lot.
10) She doesn’t like their Linda parking outside her
house, as it stops her from seeing what is going on.
h) Do teenagers take her seriously?
i) What would she do, if she was their teacher?
j) What are her opinions about teachers?
k) Is there anything hypocritical in what she says?
l) Why does she have to stop talking?
KEYS
Highlight: gets on my nerves, it drives me crazy, they get my back up, they wind me up.
You can add ‘really’ to any of these, for emphasis.
T/F
1.F – she has plenty/lots to say.
2. F- she is really angry when doors are open and the heating is on.
3. T
4. T.
5. F – she waves her stick at them and she is rude.
6. F – they laugh at her.
7. T
8. T
9. F – she really hates complainers.
10. T

Q/A
a) (Above)
b) She wants them to sit tight and be ready to listen
c) She can’t stand doors being open when the heating is on.
d) She closes the door and then she asks to speak to the manager.
e) They give her a funny look. (They probably think she is crazy. Well, she doesn’t look like an eco-warrior…)
f) They sit on swings.
g) She tells them they should be at home, playing their stupid computer games.
h) No, they laugh at her and call her ‘Granny Grumpy’.
i) She would give them a clip round the ear.
j) They are not what they were in her day! All they do is preach/go on about the environment and they wear
jeans.
k) Yes. She says she hates people who complain, but she complains all the time!
l) Linda arrives. (Linda must be a relative, because she says ‘our Linda’.) She is going to park in front of GG’s
house, but that would obstruct her view, so she has to go and tell Linda to park somewhere else.

Some colloquialisms:
Sit tight = sit nice and still.
Believe you me = an imperative = you must believe me
Can’t stand = hate
Give a piece of your mind = tell somebody off, in no uncertain terms. Tell them very strongly what you think.
Give a funny look = look at someone disparagingly, as if they are doing something wrong.
To be on the warpath = to be belligerent and looking for trouble. War path = going into battle
To give a clip around the ear/ear hole/lug = to slap somebody.
Shove off = (shove means push) get lost, push off, (telling somebody quite sharply to go somewhere else/clear off.
Pet hate = the thing you hate but are most likely to talk about
A cuppa = cup of tea
A chinwag = a chat/gossip