Sound of Silence

By: Elizabeth Green

You’ve walked in and was welcomed by the mess you’re not even sure where it came from. You
put your bag on the couch and started to clean up. There were clothes, shoes, socks, hangers, books,
toys, food wrappers. Everything’s scattered on the floor as if it was a garbage truck. Then, you heard the
water from the bathroom flowing. You came in and saw no one.

A sigh came out from you. You washed the dishes and even got your uniform stained from the
mess. It’s already twenty pasts five. The fridge is empty again as you checked and that made you feel
tired even more.

Then, there comes your son who just came from school. He threw his bag to the floor, his shoes
and socks scattered on the floor. He doesn’t even care about the tired look in your face. He didn’t even
greet you nor gave you a glance. Your daughter came in a few minutes later. And just like your son, she
didn’t see you. She was too focused to her phone that she almost slipped.

Your wife came in with a grocery in her hands. You took them from her and immediately started
to cook dinner. She left her bag on the kitchen table as she drank water. She looks exhausted and
wasted. She didn’t say a word to you and immediately get in to the master’s bedroom. Your son and
daughter started to fight over the remote control of the television. You tried to stop them but they
didn’t hear you. Then, came out their mother who has changed already. She shouted at them who are
still bickering but stopped the moment they heard her.

The whole living room is as messier as you came. The same things scattered on the floor. You
picked up everything and put them where they belong. Then, you felt an excruciating pain in your back.
You sat on the floor for a while and waited for the pain to go away.

“I’m hungry!” shouted your son which reminded you of what you’re supposed to be doing in the
kitchen.

Slowly and carefully, you stood up without letting any sound of pain. You opened the cauldron
and checked the rice. Your eyes were caught by the veins coming out from your hands. And now that
you were aware, you started to feel the numbing pain coming from it. Then you just remembered what
you did at work. You drove for your boss for almost six hours, then visited all of the branches, standing
up the whole day. You even forgot to eat lunch. Couldn’t even rest and sit properly.

A painful smile came out from your lips. You couldn’t even dare to say that you’re tired. You
don’t even have the chance to sit and rest your back.

Dinner is ready after few minutes. You set the table and called for them. Your wife sat first. Then
your daughter and son. You were about to tell them to pray first but they couldn’t seem to hear you.
They started to eat. And you, you’re still making their plates full.

“I’m really starving,” said your wife.

 You were just about to sit when your son and daughter started to fight over the remaining fish
that was supposed to be yours. They were too loud that you took the fish from them then divided it to
two.

“How was school today, Joshua?”

“Nothing new.”

“How about you Selene?”

“I still hate my Math teacher.”

You were waiting for your wife to ask you too but she didn’t. You were about to ask her but she
began talking already.

“I was too tired today. My boss gave me too many works I couldn’t even do for a day. I think I
should get a massage this weekend.”

“Let me come with you mom,” said your daughter.

“You know you can’t. We have to manage our finances practically.”

“Rice!” shouted your son.

“Fill the platter with rice, Selene,” you ordered.

But your daughter didn’t seem to hear you. She didn’t even look at you. Then, you saw Joshua’s
eyes. It was the first time he looked at you ever since he came from school. You were left no choice but
to stand up and fill the platter.

“I think I should see a doctor tomorrow,” you said.

Nobody answered you. They don’t even seem to hear you. The pain, it wasn’t because of your
back anymore. Your chest seeks for air. Your throat hurts because of you trying to stop the cry from
letting out. You turned away and looked up.

Your daughter stood up as soon as she finished eating, go to her room and locked up. Your
wife’s been telling you that she’s tired and she needs to rest. Your seven-year old son didn’t even finish
his food.

No one seems to listen. Nobody hears your words. Nobody’s interested at all about your stories.
Then, a realization struck you. You’ve lived your whole life like an outcast, a useless person. Nobody sees
your pain. Nobody cares of you getting tired.

You cleaned the table and washed the dishes. Ignoring the pain has been your expertise for the
past years. Whining about it now would only make you look stupid for them. They might even laugh at
you. That’s why you just let it pass like you always do.

Inhale, exhale. You can feel the painful tickle in your heart as if it is being pierced with a
thousand needles. You can’t breathe properly. Your vision’s starting to blur. Even if you looked up, your
tears won’t just seem to stop from falling.
 You looked around the house. Do you even have a good and happy memory in this house? Can
you still remember the last time you were able to laugh in this house? The photographs in the living
room remind you of everything that happened in your life, and wished that if only camera photographs
emotions.

You were happy even if you were like invisible sometimes. You made them happy. You love their
smiles, laughs, their stories. You love every moment with your family. You love it each time your son and
daughter run to you crying, seeking for comfort. You love the way your wife scrubs your back and
massage your feet.

But you still wanted to scream. The sound of silence is deafening you. It’s breaking your ear,
breaking your heart. This silence made you think how pathetic you’ve lived your life. It made you
realized what a martyr you’ve become throughout the years.

And that was so painful for you to admit. So painful that you just closed your eyes and took a
deep breath as if it would make everything better. You’re not sure when will your silent cries would end
or when will your pain would stop and fade away. But then, you think of them. And you realized that
they’re the only reason for you to live. That reason, is enough for you to endure everything and continue
moving forward since you are a husband and a father who would willingly sacrifice everything in order
to give his family all the love and care in the world.