Professional Documents
Culture Documents
Women Doing
Intimacy
Gender, Family
and Modernity in
Britain and
Hong Kong
Stevi Jackson · Petula Sik Ying Ho
Palgrave Macmillan Studies in Family and
Intimate Life
Series Editors
Lynn Jamieson
University of Edinburgh
Edinburgh, UK
David H. J. Morgan
University of Manchester
Manchester, UK
‘The Palgrave Macmillan Studies in Family and Intimate Life series is
impressive and contemporary in its themes and approaches’
– Professor Deborah Chambers, Newcastle University, UK, and author
of New Social Ties.
The remit of the Palgrave Macmillan Studies in Family and Intimate
Life series is to publish major texts, monographs and edited collections
focusing broadly on the sociological exploration of intimate relation-
ships and family organization. The series covers a wide range of topics
such as partnership, marriage, parenting, domestic arrangements, kin-
ship, demographic change, intergenerational ties, life course transitions,
step-families, gay and lesbian relationships, lone-parent households, and
also non-familial intimate relationships such as friendships and includes
works by leading figures in the field, in the UK and internationally, and
aims to contribute to continue publishing influential and prize-winning
research.
Women Doing
Intimacy
Gender, Family and Modernity
in Britain and Hong Kong
Stevi Jackson Petula Sik Ying Ho
University of York University of Hong Kong
York, UK Pok Fu Lam, Hong Kong
This Palgrave Macmillan imprint is published by the registered company Springer Nature Limited
The registered company address is: The Campus, 4 Crinan Street, London, N1 9XW, United
Kingdom
Acknowledgments
This book has been a long time in the making. We know we have
tested to the limit the patience of the series editors, Graham Crow, Lynn
Jamieson and David Morgan as well as our editors at Palgrave, Amelia
Derkatsch and Poppy Hull. We thank them for bearing with us while we
struggled with the competing demands of academic life and with living
through turbulent times in Hong Kong. We also much appreciate Lynn
Jamieson’s careful reading of the completed manuscript. The project was
made possible through an ESRC Hong Kong Bilateral award, co-funded
by the Hong Kong Research Council (RES-000-22-362), which pro-
vided a rare opportunity to conduct collaborative and comparative re-
search between Britain and Hong Kong, for which we are extremely
grateful.
Our particular thanks go to the women who gave up their time to tell
us about their lives and relationships. We recognise that we cannot do
justice to the depth and scope of their conversations with us, but have
endeavoured to render their stories as faithfully as we can. We also ap-
preciate the contribution of all those who assisted us in the course of our
v
vi Acknowledgments
research. Harriet Badger transcribed all the English data and also pro-
vided much practical support to our long-distance collaboration. We had
the help of three research assistants, at different times, at the University
of Hong Kong and a research fellow at the University of York. In Hong
Kong, Cheung Man Lap (Alec Cheung), Prisken Lo and Ho Kwok Ying
(Connie Ho) aided Sik Ying in organising and conducting interviews.
We thank them all. We owe a particular debt to Jin Nye Na, our post-
doctoral research fellow at York, who worked with us during the first 18
months of the project. Jin Nye conducted most of the British interviews,
co-facilitated the two focus groups and played a central role in the early
stages of analysis. She did a fantastic job of the initial coding, summaris-
ing and mapping of the British data, which proved to be invaluable to
our subsequent analysis. We would also like to thank her for allowing
us to reuse and incorporate into the book revised sections of two articles
that she co-authored with us: “Reshaping Tradition? Women Negotiating
the Boundaries of Tradition and Modernity in Hong Kong and British
Families”, published in The Sociological Review, 61 (42), 2013 and. “A
Tale of Two Societies: The Doing of Qualitative Comparative Research
in Hong Kong and Britain”, published in Methodological Innovations On-
line 10 (2), 2017. Sui-Ting Kong collaborated with us an article from
more recent research, from which we have used a short extract, “Speak-
ing Against Silence: Finding a Voice in Hong Kong Chinese Families
Through the Umbrella Movement”, Sociology, 52 (5), 2018. While we
were finalising the manuscript, Lauren Cowling played a major role in
compiling and formatting our references. We fully appreciate her effi-
ciency and attention to detail. On a more personal level, we would like
to thank Sui-Ting Kong, Sue Scott, Ann Kaloski-Naylor, Harriet Badger
and Evangeline Kai-Wen Tsao for their friendship and intellectual nur-
turance through some difficult times.
We gratefully acknowledge permission to reuse passages from the fol-
lowing publications in the pages of this book.
ix
x Contents
References 225
Index 247
List of Tables
xi
1
Introduction: The Genesis
of a Transnational Collaborative Project
This book derives from a comparative study of the personal lives of young
adult women and their mothers in Hong Kong and Britain (England and
Wales) against a backdrop of social change in both societies. Transna-
tional collaborative qualitative research of the kind we describe here is
relatively unusual, in part because it presents practical difficulties, not
least in financing it, but also because of the parochial, local focus of
most social research, especially in western countries. We were fortunate
to gain funding from an ESRC Hong Kong Bilateral Award, co-funded
by Hong Kong’s Research Grants Council (RES-000-22-362). A central
element of our bid was to challenge the Eurocentrism of current debates
about families, intimacy and social change under late modern social con-
ditions though investigating the lives of two generations of women in one
‘western’ (British) and one East Asian (Hong Kong) location. We are not
simply treating these two locations as isolated examples, or as different
modernities, but as part of a web of asymmetrical global interconnections
that have produced the condition of the contemporary world variously
described as late, second or post-modernity. In this endeavour, we have
been influenced by feminist and other critical engagements with theori-
sations of late modern intimacy (Smart 2007; Heaphy 2007; Jamieson
extremes of violence used, thinking that the protesters had a just cause.
This experience, therefore, did not do anything to alter her critical stance
on the colonial regime. Her time in Hong Kong planted the seeds of her
later interest in East Asian societies. For all its problems, there was much
about Hong Kong that she loved and which left her with a deep attach-
ment to it and with a continued—and continuing—concern about its
future.
Sik Ying was only eight years old at the time of the disturbances, but
one particular memory of them has stuck in her mind, and also tells us
something about the contrasting lives led by the local Chinese and even
humble members of the British population. At the time Sik Ying’s family
(her parents, grandmother and 6 children) lived in Sai Ying Pun in one
room of an apartment shared with two other families—a contrast with
the roomy three-bedroomed flat where Stevi lived with her parents and
sister. Sik Ying remembers one tragic and horrific incident from the riots:
the death of the radio actor and social commentator Lam Bun, who was
attacked by the leftists, doused with petrol and set alight in his car. The
reason this mattered to an eight-year old was because of the significance
of the serialised radio drama Dai Zengfu (Big/Real Man’s Diary), starring
Lam Bun, in her daily life. Her mother listened to the show every night
at 10 pm. She would bribe the children into helping her assemble plastic
flowers and toys (factory outwork) by telling them that if they were able
to work hard until Dai Zengfu started, they would be rewarded with
late supper snacks—sesame soup, red bean soup and sometimes wonton
noodles. As a result of Lam Bun’s death, which shocked the family, the
much-loved show that had marked the end of their working day was
terminated.
Soon after the disturbances, Sik Ying’s family moved to a new public
housing estate in East Kowloon. She was educated at St Paul’s School
(Lam Tin), which, like most schools in Hong Kong, was church run,
reflecting the colonial context in which Christian organisations and mis-
sionaries provided much of the welfare and education for the local pop-
ulation. St Paul’s was a school for girls run by the Sisters of St. Paul de
Chartres, an order than had been active in Hong Kong since the mid-
nineteenth century. Sik Ying went on to obtain her undergraduate and
1 Introduction: The Genesis of a Transnational … 5
master’s degrees at the University of Hong Kong, where she was sub-
sequently employed. It was, therefore, a thoroughly colonial education,
modelled on the British system.1 Later, as a mature student, Sik Ying
went to the UK for postgraduate study, gaining her Ph.D. from the Uni-
versity of Essex in 1996. Overseas education is valued in Hong Kong and
in the colonial era British education was seen as the best available. Study-
ing in the UK was also facilitated by the colonial system. Sik Ying’s Ph.D.
was funded by a Commonwealth Scholarship, by a grant specifically for
junior women academics who did not have a Ph.D. She also acquired a
British passport as part of a special scheme to discourage educated people
from fleeing Hong Kong prior to the 1997 handover to China.
Sik Ying arrived in the UK in the early 1990s, by which time Hong
Kong had changed dramatically since the 1960s. It had experienced rapid
economic growth with GDP per capita rising substantially year on year
from $714 in 1968 to $13,281 in 1990.2 It was still, by this measure,
not as wealthy as the UK (with a per capita GDP of $20,808 in 1990)3
but was now identified as one of the ‘Asian Tigers’ and no longer as a
‘third world’ economy. The gulf between rich and poor remained, but
the educated middle classes were doing well, enjoying high salaries and
the benefits of a technologically advanced consumer society. On arriving
in the UK, Sik Ying was shocked to find that the country was so back-
ward, especially technologically. For example, the accommodation office
at the Essex University was using pencil to record room bookings and
allocation. She found British people polite but rather slow and inefficient
after the hard-working fast-paced life in Hong Kong. She also felt that
she was richer than her UK peers, could afford expensive designer clothes
and long international phone calls to her boyfriend in Holland. Yet at the
same time she was disappointed and disoriented by her encounter with
the reality of life in Britain. Her English was not as good as she thought,
despite being educated through the medium of English since she started
secondary school, and she had a Hong Kong accent. Her understanding
1 Hong Kong has recently moved to a school and university system more like that in the USA.
2 https://countryeconomy.com/gdp/hong-kong?year=1990. Accessed 24 February 2019.
3 https://countryeconomy.com/gdp/uk. Accessed 24 February 2019.
6 S. Jackson and P. S. Y. Ho
privilege she had enjoyed many years before in Hong Kong. She had
learnt from her East Asian graduate students who had also connected
her to networks of scholars from the region, enabling her to discover the
richness of feminist work being produced there but which was largely
unknown in British sociology and women’s and gender studies. It was
this that precipitated our first meeting in Trondheim. Stevi had noticed
that the names of a small group of Hong Kong scholars appeared on the
conference programme and wanted to meet them. Spotting a group of
Chinese people at breakfast in the hotel she took a chance and walked
over to their table, asked if they were the delegates from Hong Kong
(they were) and introduced herself.
We started working together on the proposal for the project in 2009,
began to plan the research in 2010 and conducted the fieldwork over the
next eighteen months. It was in some ways opportunistic, a response to
a funding call that offered a rare opportunity for collaboration between
UK and Hong Kong scholars. It was not, however, only opportunistic,
as we had a genuine intellectual aim: to do work that challenged western
knowledge claims. Even so, the UK and Hong Kong may seem odd cases
for comparison as one is a nation and the other is a Special Administra-
tive Region of China.4 This asymmetrical relationship, however, is part of
what makes the comparison of interest. As our personal biographical nar-
ratives indicate, these two societies are a product of their interconnected
histories and, as we will argue later, of the wider global connections that
shaped the modern world.
Working together was not always easy or straightforward. Although we
had stayed in touch over the intervening years since our first meeting, we
did not know each other very well when we began the project and there
was, therefore, a certain degree of risk in collaborating and in not fully
understanding each other’s approach to research or the intellectual bag-
gage we each brought to it. It was very much a learning experience for
both of us. We had slightly different intellectual agendas, differing theo-
retical and methodological concerns and intellectual histories in addition
to our specific cultural locations. This affected what we each brought
4 While here we use ‘UK’ in discussing the relationship between the two territories, elsewhere
we deliberately use ‘Britain’ and ‘British’ since all the UK interviews were conducted in England
and Wales rather than in the UK as a whole.
8 S. Jackson and P. S. Y. Ho
ultimately to the protests that began in the summer of 2019. These later
protests were sparked by a bill (now withdrawn) allowing extradition of
alleged criminals to mainland China but have broadened into wider pro-
democracy activism. The reverberations of the Umbrella Movement, as
our recent research demonstrates, had an impact on personal and family
life (see Ho et al. 2018b, c), which prompts us to think about the future
consequences of the 2019–2020 struggles, intensified early in 2020 by
the coronavirus outbreak. These political developments, because of their
urgency and immediacy, absorbed much of our energy and diverted us
away from completing work on this book. At the same time, however,
they offered us new insights and cast new light on the data we had gath-
ered from our sample of mothers and daughters. Where relevant we use
some of our more recent research in what follows to complement our
earlier findings on Hong Kong family life.
In the next chapter, we begin to explore and elaborate on the issues
outlined above by discussing the theoretical and methodological frame-
work of our study and then introducing our participants. In the fol-
lowing chapter, we set the lives of women in Britain and Hong Kong
in historical context, emphasising the interconnections between the UK,
China and Hong Kong that have shaped those lives. We might think that
this matters only for Hong Kong, but it does not; Britain’s past empire,
we will argue, shaped the ‘home country’ as much as its colonies. In sur-
veying this history, we will use accounts from the women we interviewed,
particularly the older generation, to demonstrate the changes that have
occurred in the social life of each location since the end of the Asia Pacific
War and the Second World War.
In the fourth chapter, we address the central issue of our study: the
diverse forms of family life in our two locations, the meaning ‘family’
has for our participants and the practices associated with it. This empha-
sis on family practices carries over into the following chapter (Chapter 5)
where we make use of the concept of ‘practices of intimacy’ (Jamieson
2011) to analyse the relationships between mothers and daughters and
how they have been sustained from the daughters’ childhoods into their
young adulthood. The sixth chapter charts the romantic and sexual rela-
tionship trajectories of both generations of women, focusing how social
change and sociocultural differences have shaped women’s partnership
1 Introduction: The Genesis of a Transnational … 11
Part of the impetus behind this project was our shared discontent with
the Eurocentrism of much of the existing work on families and rela-
tionships—at least that considered more mainstream—and in particu-
lar a neglect of East Asia. Living, as we are told, in the ‘Asian century’,
we cannot but be aware of Asian economic ascendancy, ‘the seemingly
irreversible shift to the East, particularly to Asia, of the dynamism of
global capitalism’ (Bhambra and Santos 2017: 4). As Dipesh Chakrabarty
(2008) points out, Europe has already been provincialised by history in
the sense that it has lost its central place in the world order, yet it con-
tinues, as an imaginary figure, to hold sway over much of the world and
European social thought continues to exert a global influence on aca-
demic production. There remains a profound asymmetry between the-
ory and research generated from the ‘west’ or the metropole and that
generated elsewhere. Too often, parochially based western knowledge is
assumed to be universal, while that generated elsewhere is categorised
as ‘area studies’, as relevant only to a particular part of the world. The
Taiwanese cultural theorist, Kuan-Hsing Chen, offers an acerbic com-
mentary on this situation:
Europeans, North Americans … [and others have] been doing area stud-
ies in relation to their own living spaces. That is, Martin Heidegger was
actually doing European Studies, as were Michel Foucault, Pierre Bour-
dieu and Jürgen Habermas. Once we recognize how extremely limited the
current conditions of knowledge are, we learn to be humble about our
knowledge claims. The universalist assertions of theory are premature, for
theory too must be deimperialized. (Chen 2010: 3)
Native pasts may serve as sources for claims to alternative cultures and
knowledges. But these are pasts that are themselves inventions of moder-
nity, that already have been reimagined in the face of challenges posed
16 S. Jackson and P. S. Y. Ho
Hong Kong, Taiwan, Singapore, Japan or South Korea are neither west-
ern nor from the Global South (if the latter is conceived as comprising
relatively impoverished or ‘developing’ nations). They are from places
that, in economic terms, might be seen as included in the ‘metropole’,
but in the academic literature continue to be treated as peripheral.
While there is now a large body of research on gender in East Asia
produced by western and indigenous researchers, much of which is fem-
inist, it largely remains sequestered in ‘area studies’ and has only rarely
been taken up by mainstream western academic feminism. When East
Asia in general, and Chinese societies in particular, have been consid-
ered by western feminists this has, in the past, sometimes simply repro-
duced orientalist and essentialist constructions of eastern women. Writ-
ing in the 1990s, Jinhua Teng (1996) pointed out that Chinese women
had historically received attention when they fitted into western political
or theoretical agendas, whether colonial, leftist, developmental or fem-
inist in character. They were thus variously portrayed as emblematic of
cultural backwardness, victims of patriarchal tradition or revolutionary
heroines. From these diverse positions Chinese women were treated as
a homogenised, unitary category and Chinese tradition, whether con-
ceived as continuing into the present or as transcended by socialist trans-
formation, was represented as having existed unchanged over the cen-
turies, as at ‘an eternal standstill’ (1996: 134). In early feminist engage-
ments with China, essentialising Chinese women was an offshoot of
treating women as a whole as a fixed, unitary category, subordinated by
a universal patriarchy, but when ‘essentialism is informed by orientalism,
one runs the risk of establishing a hierarchical relation between Western
women and Chinese women that ironically reinforces the discursive sub-
ordination of Chinese women’ (Teng 1996: 141). Feminism has come a
long way since the 1970s and it is now widely recognised that women
are not a unitary category. Feminist work on Chinese societies has also
grown and developed since then, and especially since Teng’s article was
published. There is now a plenty of sophisticated and nuanced research
on the gendered complexities of Chinese societies. Yet Teng’s hopes that
women’s studies might provide an opportunity for ‘Chinese studies to
end its segregation’, which has ‘meant its marginalization in the Western
academy’ (1996: 144–145), remain unrealised.
18 S. Jackson and P. S. Y. Ho
In the context of this book, it is vital that we recognise that not all
Chinese majority societies are the same; Hong Kong differs from main-
land China, Taiwan and Singapore. These societies may share a cultural
heritage but this is not something that has remained unchanged over
time and how it has changed, and how it has been re-shaped and re-
interrogated in the past and present, has been influenced by their diverse
histories, including the legacies of colonialism, western and Japanese.
These societies also differ in terms of socio-economic conditions, their
political regimes and their location within the regional and global geopo-
litical order. Even within the small territory of Hong Kong, there are
differences of class, of age and generation, of antecedents (local or main-
land) and individual biographies among women. It is as absurd to treat
‘Chinese women’ or ‘Chinese culture’ as unitary as it would be to regard
British women or British culture as essential unities. Yet the imagined
fictions of ‘west’ and ‘east’ continue to haunt us—we do not imagine
ourselves to be immune from stereotypes of ‘the other’. This is where
collaborative working between scholars from two different cultures can
be an advantage, in sensitising us to local specificities, raising questions
about what each takes for granted and enabling a mutual and reciprocal
process of making what is familiar to each of us strange and, conversely,
facilitating an appreciation of everyday actualities that might seem, to an
outsider, alien and ‘other’ (Jackson and Ho 2018).
Working between Hong Kong and the UK is a very specific project.
Neither can be considered representative of their geographical region
(Europe or East Asia) and thus cannot be used to generalise about East
Asian or European social mores and practices. While this comparative
case may be very particular, the historical relationship between the UK
and Hong Kong, as coloniser and colonised, respectively, makes it of par-
ticular interest as an exercise in attending to the interconnected histories
that have shaped the modern world (cf. Bhambra 2007). Both are now
part of the rich, post-industrial world but British colonialism has left its
mark. The particular niche Hong Kong occupied in the British Empire
was associated with a neglect of the local population (see Chapter 3).
Up to the 1970s, Hong Kong was characterised by ‘third world’ lev-
els of poverty but it is now richer in terms of GDP per capita than
the UK. World Bank figures indicate that in 1960 Hong Kong’s per
2 Conceptualising and Investigating the Gendered … 19
capital GDP was less than a third of the UK’s (US$429.44 compared
with US$1380.31). Since then Hong Kong’s wealth has grown exponen-
tially, with a GDP per capita of $46,193.61 in 2017 surpassing the UK’s
$39,720.44.1 The IMF ranks Hong Kong as the 10th richest economy in
the world (with the UK ranking 28th).2 This is, however, only part of the
picture; Hong Kong may be among the richest places in the world, but
it is also one of the most unequal in terms of the distribution of income,
ranking 9th most unequal, much worse than the UK (at 86th) and worse
than comparable Asian economies (Singapore 32nd, Japan 63rd, South
Korea 76th, Taiwan 81st).3 The most widely used, though far from per-
fect, index of inequality is the Gini coefficient, where the closer to zero,
the more equal, the closer to one the more unequal. Hong Kong’s Gini
coefficient has risen steadily from 0.45 in the 1980s to 0.54 in 20164 ;
The UK has also become more unequal since the 1970s, from its histori-
cally most equal at around 0.24 to around 0.34 in 2015–2016, with the
most significant rise, unsurprisingly, in the 1980s.5 Britain’s increasing
inequality, reflecting the erosion of progressive taxation and the welfare
state, while alarming in its consequences, has not produced the degree of
stark inequality and grinding poverty evident in Hong Kong, where the
policies of both the colonial and present administration have resulted
in a lack of welfare provision and a huge gulf between rich and poor
(Goodstadt 2013a, b, 2018). These conditions force Hong Kong’s inhab-
itants into self-reliance in a climate of economic uncertainty, with con-
sequences for their personal lives, as we will see in subsequent chapters.
In this postcolonial era, comparing women’s lives in two contexts, shaped
by their differing relations to the legacies of colonialism and imperialism,
offers us an opportunity to think about the gendered consequences of
1 https://data.worldbank.org/indicator/ny.gdp.pcap.cd?end=2017&start=1960&view=chart.
Accessed 3 February 2019.
2 https://www.businessinsider.com/the-richest-countries-in-the-world-2018-5?r=US&IR=T#29-
france-45473-1. Accessed 3 February 2019.
3 https://photius.com/rankings/2018/economy/distribution_of_family_income_gini_index_
2018_0.html.
4 https://www.socialindicators.org.hk/en/indicators/economy/11.6. Accessed 3 February 2019.
5 https://www.equalitytrust.org.uk/how-has-inequality-changed. Accessed 3 February 2019.
20 S. Jackson and P. S. Y. Ho
exploring the impact of political protest on Hong Kong family life (Ho
et al. 2018b).
In western theory, particular forms of intimacy have been associated
with the development of modernity, but this relationship has been much
contested. In the first place, the way modernity is framed is profoundly
Eurocentric. In the long history of theorising modernity, dating back to
the nineteenth century, western scholars have tended to assume (until
very recently) that their parochially based theories are universally appli-
cable. In much academic theorising, modernity has been seen as paradig-
matically western, an assumption now brought into question (see Bham-
bra 2007; Chakrabarty 2008). If we define late modernity in the narrow
sense in which it is usually understood (a sense that requires some inter-
rogation), it is a condition characteristic of ‘developed’, post-industrial
and wealthy societies. These now include East Asian nations and terri-
tories such as Japan, South Korea, Singapore, Taiwan and Hong Kong,
while China is in the process of a major modernisation project. These
societies, with some common features but differing histories, cultures
and socio-political conditions, therefore present scholars with an oppor-
tunity to think about the consequences of late modern social change
for our intimate lives beyond the Euro-American arena and to reflect
critically on Eurocentric theories. Yet it is not only western academics
who need to do some re-thinking. As Chakrabarty argues, provincial-
ising Europe not only means recognising that ‘Europe’s acquisition of
the adjective “modern” for itself is an integral part of the story of Euro-
pean imperialism’, but that modernising nationalisms elsewhere have also
been complicit in equating Europe and modernity (2008: 43). While
Chakrabarty is largely concerned with the ways in which this idea of
modernity manifests in the Indian context, it could also be applied to
much East Asian scholarship. As a consequence of the hegemony of
western theory, many East Asian scholars take the idea of modernity as
paradigmatically western as a starting point, even as they modify and
contest western theories in relation to their particular local contexts (see,
for example, Tanabe and Tokita-Tanabe 2003; Yan 2009; Chang 2010b).
A further problem of seeing European societies as the originators
of modernity and everyone else as engaged in a game of catch-up,
it that it ignores the interconnected histories that made the rise of
2 Conceptualising and Investigating the Gendered … 23
in the western world and then taken as the basis of contrasts with Asia,
false comparisons are being made. Secondly, modifying the theories of
Beck or Giddens to fit China, Japan or Korea, while ignoring critiques
of their work, leaves the account of western modernity untouched. If
modernity is imagined from specific locations, then this applies to soci-
ological imaginings too, to how sociologists imagine both their own and
other societies.
It is therefore worth considering briefly some of the problems western
scholars have identified in these influential theories and the alternative
images of western societies they have produced. One key theme in all
the criticisms is the lack of evidence to support many of the claims Gid-
dens (1992) and Beck and Beck-Gernsheim (1995, 2002) make about
changes to intimate lives under late modern conditions—and their wilful
neglect of existing research, especially feminist research, on these issues.
Their claims are thus seen as more speculative than empirically grounded
(Jamieson 1999; Heaphy 2007; Jackson 2015). There are, however, a
number of more specific points made by their critics. First, Western soci-
eties can be imagined as overly de-traditionalised, as if only Asian soci-
eties have traditions, so that the European and modern are assumed to
be opposed to the local and traditional—as in Tanabe and Tokita Tan-
abe’s account (2003). They argue, contra Giddens, that modernity in
Asia ‘cannot be seen as a “post-traditional order”’, but involves a ‘com-
plex self-reflexive endeavour to position oneself for and against “Euro-
pean modernity” and “indigenous tradition”’ (2003: 4, emphasis in orig-
inal). It is easy to see why a reading of western accounts might give the
impression that tradition in the West is dead—or no longer very salient
to everyday life. Modernity is characterised as a ‘post-traditional order’
(Giddens 1991: 4) or as profoundly affected by ‘de-traditionalization’
Beck and Beck-Gernsheim (2001: 25–26). While neither Giddens nor
Beck and Beck-Gernsheim argue that tradition is completely irrelevant
to late modern life, they see it as no longer having institutional moor-
ings; in the contemporary world tradition ‘loses its rationale’ (Giddens
1991: 206) or ‘has force only through the decisions and experience of
individuals’ (Beck and Beck-Gernsheim 2002: 26). It is largely ‘invented’
tradition (Hobsbawm 1983) that is seen as having some purchase in con-
temporary times: as ‘chosen and invented’ to cope with the pressures of
2 Conceptualising and Investigating the Gendered … 27
may have become less authoritarian in western societies, but they are far
from being egalitarian; how democratic and open they are can vary from
one western country to another (see, e.g. Schalet 2011), as well varying
within any society.
Bringing parent–child relationships into the frame also raises questions
about the idea of ‘elective affinities’. Some relationships are clearly more
elective than others. One may choose one’s lover or spouse but not one’s
parents. Couples and individuals may now make decisions on whether
to have children, when and how many, albeit within the constraints of
fertility, the reliability of contraception and the availability of assisted
conception or options for adoption. Once children arrive, however, par-
ent–child bonds are not usually thought of as elective. Both normatively
and legally, parents remain responsible for their children until they attain
adulthood while children, particularly when young, remain dependant
on their parents for their every need. Conversely, some affinities have
always been elective, friendship being the primary example.
Finally, Giddens and Beck and Beck-Gernsheim stand accused of pre-
senting an overly homogenised ‘monochrome’ view of western societies
(Smart and Shipman 2004), a white middle-class view of the world. They
ignore class differences that might lead, for example, to more geographi-
cal mobility and hence movement away from kin among the professional
classes than the less advantaged as well as the ethnic diversity of contem-
porary western societies. The ethnocentrism of these accounts is particu-
larly marked, since there is strong evidence of the continued importance
of kin ties in many minority ethnic communities (Smart and Shipman
2004; Heaphy 2007). To this charge of ethnocentrism could be added
eurocentrism, in the failure to acknowledge the contribution of these
same minorities, and their ancestors in their countries of origin, to the
development of European modernity.
Three points are central to our analysis and pertinent to both western
and East Asian contexts. First, what Carol Smart (2007) calls ‘relation-
ality’ remains central to late modern selves; secondly, ideas and practices
deemed ‘traditional’ (albeit reconfigured within modernity) still play a
part in personal life; and thirdly, gender inequality and heteronorma-
tivity persist—in old and new ways—in the social ordering of personal
30 S. Jackson and P. S. Y. Ho
life. Having said this, we also need to consider what differentiates west-
ern and East Asian societies. First, we need to consider differing histo-
ries of specific nations and territories and their locations within colo-
nial, neo-colonial and modernisation projects and processes. Secondly,
we should take account of varied cultural traditions and how these have
been reshaped by history and by contemporary social conditions in an
increasingly globalised world. Thirdly, while gender inequality and het-
eronormativity are global phenomena they are not everywhere the same,
differing both in degree and form (Jackson 2018, 2019). Finally, all these
differences impact upon the ordering of intimate relationships, the prac-
tices through which they are sustained and how relational selfhood is
constituted and experienced within them. In addressing these differences,
some care needs to be taken over the version of ‘the west’ used for com-
parative purposes.
freed from having to cater to their husbands’ daily needs, while men
are freed from monogamy. These family strategies are class specific—that
of a wife/mother and children moving abroad for educational purpose is
clearly a means of middle-class social reproduction while other forms of
family separation, for example a Hong Kong man taking a job across the
border in China because of lack of local opportunities, may be available
to those who are less privileged.
These class-based strategies have varied consequences, one of which is
the extent to which family members have access to trans-local cultural
and social capital and foreign or ‘western’ ideas, which may affect how
they live their lives. Asian families affected by compressed modernisa-
tion are not homogenous and are not all affected in the same ways by
global–local interrelations. Lan coins the phrase ‘glocal entanglement’ to
describe two levels of global-local entanglements, ‘those between soci-
eties with intersecting histories and often under asymmetrical relations
of power’ and how ‘the local society as an uneven entity receives, engages
and negotiates with these entanglements in a dynamic and disparate
manner’ (2014: 534). These will have differential consequences within
local societies and may both reflect and reinforce local inequalities, in
terms of those who have access to the ideas and commodities that are
seen as part of a ‘modern’ and cosmopolitan lifestyle.
Modernity may be a singular global phenomenon but its impact is
uneven both within and between nations and regions. The analyses
developed by these Asian theorists emphasise the importance of ‘provin-
cializing the Western experience of modernity and refraining from essen-
tialising or homogenizing non-Western cultures and societies’ (Lan 2014:
544). It is also crucial to take account of the specific histories of given
societies and the local and global socio-economic and political conditions
that have shaped them. Hong Kong and Britain have very particular his-
tories and an interrelationship that continues to influence lives today (see
Chapter 3). It is in terms of these theoretical considerations that we anal-
yse the lives of the women we interviewed.
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huimapäinen vain, kuten sinäkin, Gustel, taidat olla. Hitto vieköön,
kuinka kauan olet jo hyöriskellyt kuninkaan ympärillä? Olet muuten
kerrassaan kuin poika. Ja vaaleat kiharat on ajettu niskasta,
junkkari», ja vanhus nykäisi häntä tukasta. »Älä vain kuvittele olevasi
ainoa naisolento leirissä. Katsoppas vain Jakob Eriksonia tässä.»
Poika astui juuri sisään tuoden pulloja ja laseja. »Samallainen mies
kuin sinäkin! Ole rauhassa, Gustel! Hän ei ole jaksanut oppia
ainoatakaan saksan sanaa. Siihen hän on liian typerä. Mutta mitä
kunnollisin ja jumalisin nainen! Ja ruma! Muuten luonnollisin asia
maailmassa, Gustel: seitsemän paitaressua, elättäjä määrätty
sotaan, vaimo lähtenyt hänen sijastaan. Mitä parhain mies! En voisi
enää mitenkään tulla toimeen ilman häntä.»
Niin olikin. Kun pappi oli avannut portin, horjui häntä vastaan nuori
mies kuolonkalpeana, kuumeisesti tuijottavin silmin, paljain päin,
otsassa ammottava haava. Hänen takanaan nosti toinen hevosen
selästä kuollutta, raskasta miestä. Oudoksi tekevistä haavoista
huolimatta tunsi pappi vainajan Ruotsin kuninkaaksi, jonka tulon
Leipzigiin hän oli nähnyt ja jonka kuva, onnistunut puuveistos, riippui
hänen huoneessaan. Syvästi liikutettuna peitti hän käsin kasvonsa ja
alkoi nyyhkyttää.
Kuumeisesti toimeliaana ja nopeasti puhuen pyysi haavoittunut
nuorukainen, että hänen kuninkaansa laskettaisi paareille vieressä
olevaan kirkkoon. Ensiksi pyysi hän kuitenkin lämmintä vettä ja
pesusienen pestäkseen kuninkaan verisen ja haavojen peittämän
pään. Toverinsa avulla laski hän vainajan, joka oli hänelle liian
raskas nostaa, vaivaiselle vuoteelle, vaipui itse sille istumaan ja
katseli hellästi vahankalpeita kasvoja. Kun hän aikoi kostuttaa niitä
sienellä, meni hän tajuttomaksi ja liukui pitkälleen vainajan ruumiille.
Hänen toverinsa nosti hänet ylös ja huomasi tarkemmin katsottuaan
paitsi otsassa myös toisen haavan rinnassa. Uudesta repeämästä,
joka oli takissa toisen, sydämen kohdalla olevan paikatun repeämän
vieressä, tihkui verta. Avatessaan varovasti toverinsa pukua,
ruotsalainen kornetti ei uskonut silmiään. »Voi sun peijakas!» änkytti
hän, ja Ida-rouva, joka piteli pesuvatia, punehtui tulipunaiseksi.
Samalla temmattiin ovi auki, ja eversti Åke Tott tuli sisään. Hänen
oli täytynyt muona-asioissa lähteä takaisin, mutta toimitettuaan asiat
hän oli rientänyt heti takaisin taistelukentälle ja, tyhjentäessään lasin
paloviinaa kylätiellä, kapakan edessä, kuullut tarinoitavan
satulassaan horjuvasta ratsastajasta, joka oli pitänyt ruumista
edessään hevosen selässä.
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