The “Orgasmic” Orgasm-Gap in India

Ahh Sex… the word that has people screaming in pleasure, but for those
with vaginas. Umm… Not really.
You must have heard about Gender gap, Pay gap. But have you ever heard about
Orgasm gap? Yes, you heard it right! Orgasm gap is term coined by Laurie Mintz, a
University of Florida professor. By textbook definition it means cis-heterosexual
women have been found to experience fewer orgasms as compared to men, lesbian or
bisexual women. Kind of morbid, I know!
According to various studies conducted by researchers from different universities
across the world including Claremont Graduate University, Indiana University, while
95 percent heterosexual men have claimed to orgasmed during sexual intercourse,
only 65 percent women can say they have found pleasure.
However, the numbers seem to be even more depressing in India, wherein according
to a survey 70 percent Indian women have never orgasmed during sex. It is kind of
ironic though because studies prove that if you’re a vagina owner, you can orgasm 20
times in a row! What a shame that more than fifty percent female population goes
without experiencing that kind of nerve wrecking pleasure even once in their lives.
A recent study examines it in the context of the much-discussed female orgasm, and
finds that it isn't really useful. According to the report, just one out of every ten
women had an orgasm during a one-night encounter, but 64 percent of males have
an orgasm in the same circumstance.
The lack of orgasms has been attributed to many socio-cultural as well as
evolutionary attributes. If we look upon the anatomy of a female body, clitoris is in
fact the organ responsible for the sexual pleasure in a female body. Men and women
alike showed a lack of comprehension of female anatomy, with 59 percent of men
and 45 percent of women unable to name the vagina. Over half of men and women
didn't know where the urethra was, and 43 percent of women and 52 percent of men
didn't know where the labia were. The clitoris was the only portion of the diagram
that most individuals got right, despite its appearance as the magical pleasure
button.
Nevertheless, anatomy aside, viewing the patriarchal structure of the Indian society
wherein women embracing and expressing their sexuality has always been somewhat
of a taboo and is viewed as inherently shameful.
Misrepresentation in porn is another reason why the orgasm-gap is so wide in India.
Porn is mostly the only source of sex-education in India and because it only focuses
on one kind of pleasure, our expectations of ‘great sex’ is quite unrealistic.
Pornography more often than not is hyper focused on male pleasure with a complete
disregard for female pleasure.
The orgasm gap seems to exist even between single women and women with a
partner, wherein 39 percent women have attested to the fact that they seem to
orgasm more frequently while masturbating rather than while engaging in a sexual
intercourse with their partner.
Many women have even admitted to faking orgasms just so their partners had
climaxed or to not bruise the so called ‘male ego’.
So, in order to reduce the orgasm-gap, more open conversation need to take place
and the taboo around sex talks would have to take a back seat for pleasure to take the
front seat. Communication is the key holds true meaning while it comes to giving and
receiving pleasure during sexual intercourse. Telling your partner how you like it is
the road to attaining orgasms.
“Who knows you might even go from being the Sahara to gushing like
the Niagara.”
Exploring your own body is another important step towards bridging the orgasm gap
and studies have shown that more women get off of Masturbating and providing self-
pleasure. Trying out sex permutations and combinations can be another step towards
attaining more orgasms. In a study done in the US, 36 percent women said that
clitoris stimulation has helped them orgasm multiple times, whereas 18 percent have
affirmed to orgasming to sexual intercourse alone.
Experiment and communication are your key to 20 orgasms!
Shows like Sex Education are doing a great job in raising awareness while being
wittingly funny. One such attempt was made by Durex Mutual Climax Condoms,
which "slows her down and accelerates her up" so that they both climax at the same
time. The film employs the not-so-subtle metaphor of a meal to demonstrate the
stages men and women go through during the act of sex and how the finish may often
be a touch anti-climactic, before breaking the metaphor to show how profoundly
enjoyable it can be when you #ComeTogether. However, the need of the hour is for
Indian media to take a plunge into the genre in a more productive manner.
Ditch the scary key words like shame, pregnancy, promiscuity. Why
can’t we talk about sex using pleasure, fun and curiosity?