BIA 3012 ENGLISH FOR ACADEMIC PURPOSES

TEST 1: WRITING SUPPORTING DETAILS (10%)

Name: NUR AZEEZA BINTI JALALUDDIN Matric number:1221506 Marks:

Group: BL1
Research title: Bullying in community / 10

Thesis statement: (Please ensure that your thesis statement is the same as your group members’)

The causes of bullying are influenced from surrounding and lack religious education which
causes to mental illness and low self-esteem.

Topic sentence:

Research has shown that being a victim bullying can lead to a physical and emotional abuse.

Connecting explanation:

Physical and emotional abuse can have serious and lasting negative impacts on our mental health and
overall wellbeing. Bullying can cause feelings of rejection, exclusion, isolation, low self-esteem and
some individuals can develop depression and anxiety as a result. In some cases, it can even develop into
Acute Stress Disorder or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. (Faillance; 2021). Thus, physical and mental
abuse are one of Adolescents who suffer from depression may lose their confidence and social abilities,
making them targets of bullying from their peers (Heino et al, 2010). Suicide is the third leading cause
of mortality in children and adolescents around the world (WHO, 2021)

(Paraphrased) Evidence / Citation:

There is overwhelming evidence from numerous studies that show there is a strong correlation prevalence
of bullying that associated with mental health. Hallgren et al (2021) the current remained stable and was
highest among girls in year 9; range = 4.9% to 16.9%. mental health problem increased; range=+1.2%
(year 9 boys) to + 4.6% (year 11 girls) and were consistently higher in girls (17.2% in year 2020). Reports
of mental health were four times higher among boys who had been bullied compared to those not bullied.
The corresponding figure for girls was 2.4 higher.

Connecting explanation:

School bullying thus sit through a serious concern, but it is liable to remain an insoluble issue if folk
pursue to see wealthy examples of bullying cast in homes, relationships, workplaces and governments.
Bullying is an evolution reality that enlarge outside the school years. As individual age, other form of
developmentally significant combative behaviors emerges (dating violence, sexual abuse, workplace
bullying) and appointed to expend power, misuse and impact. (Farrel & Vaillancourt, 2021; Pepler et al.,
2006). An expanding perspective shows that bullying behavior, and the rewards associated with it, do
not stop in youth but pursue into the social contexts of adults. Furthermore, the social ecological
perspective highlights the importance of external ecological impacts, such as parents, communities, and
governments, and how bullying and the abuse of power are an issue that deeply involves, but also
transcends, the school setting. For example, when consistent efforts towards altering the power structure
were abandoned at higher ecological levels (e.g., government and community support) (Roland, 2011).
 BIA 3012 ENGLISH FOR ACADEMIC PURPOSES
TEST 1: WRITING SUPPORTING DETAILS (10%)

Concluding sentence:

Thus, being a victim of bullying can lead us to get a serious physical and mental abuse because it was
really trauma of what had happened to the victim’s feelings.

Reference:

Andrew V. Dane, Antonius H N Cillessen, Naomi Andrews & Wendy M Craig. April 2023. ‘Bullying
and The Abuse Of Power. International Journal of Bullying Prevention. <(PDF) Bullying And The
Abuse Of Power (Researchgate.Net)>. Accessed: 23 June 2023

Best Day Psychiatry And Counseling. 2023. ‘The Effects Of Bullying On Mental Health’. <The Effects
Of Bullying On Mental Health - Best Day Psychiatry & Counseling>. Accessed: 23 June 2023.

Eleanor Hendricks & Pius Tangwe Tanga. April 2019. ‘Effects of Bullying on The Psychological
Functioning Of Victims. Southern African Journal of Social Work and Social Development 31 (1).
<(PDF) Effects Of Bullying On The Psychological Functioning Of Victims (Researchgate.Net)>.
Accessed: 23 June 2023

Geir Arild Espnes, Mary-Elizabeth Bradley Eilersten, Hanne Nissen Bjornsen & Unni Karin Moksnes.
08 January 2020. ‘Social Support, Bullying, School-Related Stress and Mental Health In Adolescence.
Nordic Psychology Volume 72 Issue 4. <Full Article: Social Support, Bullying, School-Related Stress
And Mental Health In Adolescence (Tandfonline.Com)>. Accessed: 23 June 2023

Hakan Kallmen & Mats Hallgren. 14 December 2021. ‘Bullying at School and Mental Health Problems
Among Adolescents: A Repeated Cross-Sectional Study. Child and Adolescent Psychiatry and Mental
Health. <Bullying At School And Mental Health Problems Among Adolescents: A Repeated Cross-
Sectional Study | Child And Adolescent Psychiatry And Mental Health | Full Text
(Biomedcentral.Com)>. Accessed: 23 June 2023

Louis A. Faillace. 12 March 2021. ‘The Impact Of Bullying On Mental Health. Psychiatry and
Behavioral Sciences. <The Impact Of Bullying On Mental Health | Mcgovern Medical School
(Uth.Edu)>. Accessed: 23 June 2023

Metin Piskin, Thseen Nazir. September 2015.’School Bullying: Effecting Childs Mental Health. The
International of Indian Psychology 2(4). < (PDF) School Bullying: Effecting Childs Mental Health
(Researchgate.Net)>. Accessed: 23 June 2023
 BIA 3012 ENGLISH FOR ACADEMIC PURPOSES
TEST 1: WRITING SUPPORTING DETAILS (10%)

Direct quotation (you used to write the paraphrased evidence / citation section above):

‘the current remained stable and was highest among girls in year 9; range = 4.9% to 16.9%. mental health
problem increased; range=+1.2% (year 9 boys) to + 4.6% (year 11 girls) and were consistently higher in
girls (17.2% in year 2020). Reports of mental health were four times higher among boys who had been
bullied compared to those not bullied. The corresponding figure for girls was 2.4 higher’. (Hallgren et
al, 2021)

‘the social ecological perspective highlights the importance of external ecological impacts, such as
parents, communities, and governments, and how bullying and the abuse of power are an issue that deeply
involves, but also transcends, the school setting. For example, when consistent efforts towards altering
the power structure were abandoned at higher ecological levels (e.g., government and community
support)’ (Dane et al, 2023)

*Your instructor will compare the quality of your paraphrased sentence above with the direct quotation
you wrote here.
Example of a direct quotation: “Agriculture is the world's second largest greenhouse gas (GHG) emitter due to the use
of fossil fuel-based fertilizers, agricultural machinery, and the burning of biomass” (Qiao et al. 2019, p. 722)