Interpersonal Attraction: From First Impressions To Long Term Intimacy

Interpersonal Attraction:
From First Impressions

to Long Term Intimacy
Chapter Outline
I. What Causes Attraction?

What Causes Attraction?
Friendships and close relationships are
at or near the top of the list of what
people say makes them happy; people
desire to be liked by even the most
casual of acquaintances.
The Person Next Door: The

Propinquity Effect
The finding that the more we see and

interact with people, the more likely they are
to become our friends is known as the
propinquity effect.

Propinquity Effect
The propinquity effect works because of the

mere exposure effect, the finding that the
more exposure we have to a stimulus, the
more apt we are to like it.
Propinquity Effect
Propinquity Effect
Similarity
As we get to know each other better, other

factors besides propinquity and
attractiveness come into play in
determining liking. Key among these is
similarity to ourselves.
Similarity
People who are similar are attractive

because they validate our own self-worth
and we assume that people who disagree
with us have negative personality traits.
Reciprocal Liking
One of the most potent determinants of our

liking someone is if we believe that that
person likes us.
If we believe somebody else likes us, we will

be a more likable person in their presence;
this will lead them to actually like us more,
which leads to a self-fulfilling prophecy.
A person’s level of self-esteem moderates

how we are affected by other people liking
us. Swann and colleagues (1992) have
shown that people with high self-esteem
like and interact with those who like them,
but people with low self-esteem prefer to
interact with somebody who criticized
them.
Physical Attractiveness on Liking
Physical attractiveness is a major

determinant of liking in studies of first
impressions.
Debate has existed on sex differences in the

importance of physical attractiveness.
Feingold (1990) reports that both sexes
value attractiveness, although men value it
somewhat more than women; however this
difference is larger for stated attitudes and
values than for actual behavior.
Recent research supports the idea that

physical attractiveness is equally important
to men and women.
The media bombards us with a standard of

beauty; and also associates beautiful
characters with high moral standards;
because of the media, we develop shared
standards of beauty.
For both sexes, this standard includes

large eyes, prominent cheekbones, and a
big smile. For women, a small nose and
chin, narrow cheeks and high eyebrows are
considered attractive; for men, a large chin
is considered attractive.
People assume that physical attractiveness

is highly correlated with other desirable
traits; this is known as the “what is
beautiful is good” stereotype.
There is a some truth to the association

between physical attractiveness and
sociability; this may be due to a self-
fulfilling prophecy.
Recollections of Initial Attraction

Aron et al. (1989) found that for love, people
reported reciprocal liking and
attractiveness important. Similarity and
propinquity were mentioned with low to
moderate frequency. For friendship,
reciprocal liking, attractiveness, similarity,
and propinquity were all mentioned as
important.
Theories of Interpersonal Attraction:

Social Exchange and Equity
Social exchange theory is the theory holding that

how people feel about a relationship depends on
their perceptions of the rewards and costs of the
relationship, the kind of relationship they believe
they deserve (comparison level), and their chances
for having a better relationship with someone else
(comparison level for alternatives).
Theories of Interpersonal Attraction:

Social Exchange and Equity
Equity theory is the theory holding that

people are happiest with relationships in
which the rewards and costs a person
experiences and the contributions he or
she makes to the relationship are roughly
equal to the rewards, costs, and
contributions of the other person.
Chapter Outline
II. Close Relationships

Close Relationships
Until recently, there was little research
in social psychology on enduring
relationships, because they are more
difficult to study scientifically: random
assignment is impossible, and feelings
can be hard to measure.
Close Relationships
Defining Love
There seem to be multiple kinds of love;

different scales to measure these have
been developed in the past decade.
Close Relationships
Defining Love
Companionate love is the feelings of

intimacy and affection we feel for another
person when we care deeply for the
person, but do not necessarily experience
passion or arousal in his or her presence.
Close Relationships
Defining Love
Passionate love is the feelings of intense

longing, accompanied by physiological
arousal, we feel for another person; when
our love is reciprocated, we feel great
fulfillment and ecstasy, but when it is not,
we feel sadness and despair.
Close Relationships
Defining Love
Sternberg developed the triangular theory

of love. This is the idea that different kinds
of love consist of varying degrees of three
components: intimacy, passion, and
commitment.
Close Relationships
Defining Love
Close Relationships
Culture and Love
Culture plays a role in how people label

their experiences and what they expect
from them. Dion and Dion (1993) suggest
that romantic love is an important basis for
marriage in individualistic societies but is
less valued in collectivist ones.
Close Relationships
Culture and Love
Recent research has noted that cultural

differences in the value placed on
romantic love are decreasing. Young
people in some collectivist cultures are
becoming more individualistic in their
approach to romantic love.
Chapter Outline
III. Love and Relationships

Love and Relationships
This section examines how the factors

examined in relationship formation play
out over time.
Evolutionary Explanations of Love
Evolutionary biology judges an animal’s

“fitness” in terms of its reproductive
success; the evolutionary approach to
love states that men and women are
attracted to different characteristics in
each other because this fosters
reproductive success.
Buss (1985) suggests that this approach

explains the different strategies of men
and women in romantic relationships.
Recent research has found that women

with more economic power are more
interested in physically attractive men
than are women with little economic
power.
Attachment Styles and Intimate

Relationships
The attachment styles approach to close

relationships focuses on the expectations
people develop about relationships based
on the relationship they had with their
primary caregiver when they were infants.

Relationships
The secure attachment style may develop

in those who have responsive caregivers
as infants and is characterized by trust, a
lack of concern with being abandoned,
and the view that one is worthy and well-
liked. Securely attached individuals have
the most enduring, long-term romantic
relationships.

Relationships
The avoidant attachment style may develop

in those who have aloof and distant
caregivers as infants and is characterized by
a suppression of attachment needs, because
attempts to be intimate have been rebuffed.
People with this style find it difficult to
develop intimate relationships.

Relationships
The anxious/ambivalent attachment style may

develop in those who had inconsistent and
overbearing caregivers as infants and is
characterized by a concern that others will not
reciprocate one’s desire for intimacy, resulting in
high levels of anxiety. Individuals with this
attachment style have the most short-lived romantic
relationships.

Relationships
Although relationships in which both

partners are securely attached are the
most successful and satisfying, anxious
woman-avoidant man relationships can
work due to the ease of attributing
problems in the relationship to gender
stereotypes.
Social Exchange in Long-Term

Relationships
Research has shown ample support for

social exchange theory in intimate
relationships. Rusbult (1980) finds that
rewards are always important in
determining the outcome of relationships,
while costs become increasingly important
over time.

Relationships
Her investment model of relationships holds

that people’s commitment to a relationship
depends on their satisfaction in terms of
rewards, costs, and comparison level, their
comparison level for alternatives, and how
much they have invested in the relationship
that would be lost by leaving it.

Relationships

Relationships
Equity in Long-Term Relationships
In new or casual relationships, people

trade benefits “in kind”; in intimate
relationships, people trade very different
resources and are looser about it.
Exchange relationships are relationships

governed by the need for equity; while
communal relationships are relationships
in which people’s primary concern is
being responsive to the other person’s
needs.
People in communal relationships are not

completely unconcerned with equity -- if
the relationship is inequitable, over time
they will become dissatisfied.

Chapter Outline
IV. Ending Intimate Relationships

Ending Intimate Relationships
The Process of Breaking Up
Recently, researchers have started to look

at what drives people to end relationships
and the processes involved in breaking up
a relationship.


Duck (1982) theorizes that there are four
stages involved in the dissolution of a
relationship: intrapersonal (focusing on
dissatisfaction), dyadic (revealing these to
the partner), social (announcing the breakup
to others), and back to intrapersonal
(devising accounts of the breakup as we
recover from it).
The Experience of Breaking Up

Akert (1998) and others find that the role
people play in a breakup is a key determinant
of how they feel about it: breakees were most
upset, breakers least, and mutuals in the
middle. Women experienced somewhat more
negative emotions than men. When the
breakup is mutual, partners are more likely to
remain friends after the relationships has
ended.

Interpersonal Attraction: From First Impressions To Long Term Intimacy

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Interpersonal Attraction:

From First Impressions

I. What Causes Attraction?

The Person Next Door: The

The finding that the more we see and

The Person Next Door: The

The propinquity effect works because of the

As we get to know each other better, other

People who are similar are attractive

One of the most potent determinants of our

If we believe somebody else likes us, we will

A person’s level of self-esteem moderates

Physical Attractiveness on Liking

Physical attractiveness is a major

Physical Attractiveness on Liking

Debate has existed on sex differences in the

Physical Attractiveness on Liking

Recent research supports the idea that

Physical Attractiveness on Liking

The media bombards us with a standard of

Physical Attractiveness on Liking

For both sexes, this standard includes

Physical Attractiveness on Liking

People assume that physical attractiveness

Physical Attractiveness on Liking

There is a some truth to the association

Recollections of Initial Attraction

Theories of Interpersonal Attraction:

Social exchange theory is the theory holding that

Theories of Interpersonal Attraction:

Equity theory is the theory holding that

II. Close Relationships

There seem to be multiple kinds of love;

Companionate love is the feelings of

Passionate love is the feelings of intense

Sternberg developed the triangular theory

Culture and Love

Culture plays a role in how people label

Culture and Love

Recent research has noted that cultural

III. Love and Relationships

This section examines how the factors

Evolutionary Explanations of Love

Evolutionary biology judges an animal’s

Evolutionary Explanations of Love

Buss (1985) suggests that this approach

Evolutionary Explanations of Love

Recent research has found that women

Attachment Styles and Intimate

The attachment styles approach to close

Attachment Styles and Intimate

The secure attachment style may develop

Attachment Styles and Intimate

The avoidant attachment style may develop

Attachment Styles and Intimate

The anxious/ambivalent attachment style may

Attachment Styles and Intimate

Although relationships in which both

Social Exchange in Long-Term

Research has shown ample support for

Social Exchange in Long-Term

Her investment model of relationships holds

Social Exchange in Long-Term