Habit of Personal Responsibility

Business Studies Department, BUKC 1

Lecture Outcomes
Be able to enhance awareness of paradigms and
have the power to choose actions and responses.
a. Be able to understand the social mirror, what
is between the stimulus and response.
b. How to define proactivity?
c. Explain the Proactive model and how to take
initiative.
d. Be able to understand the difference between
the circle of concern & circle of influence and
differentiate between direct, indirect and no
control problems
e. How to make and keep commitments 2
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• Humans have a unique trait.
• Humans can exercise “self-awareness”;
the ability to think about their own
thought process
• To know their MOOD, FEELINGS or
MENTAL STATE and assess its reasons.

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• Despite of its REAL colour (i.e. the
reality).
• What we see is still very much
dependent on…
• The colour of the LENSES that we
are looking through.

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•what we see may not even
represent the actual colour it
is.
•The lenses are like our
paradigms for most of us.

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• Being Proactive is about increasing our
awareness of our own paradigms.
• So that we are able to recognise those,
which might be…
• Incorrect or incomplete, and which are
within us.
• from there…

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• If our vision comes from social mirror,
opinions, perceptions and paradigms of
others…
• Our view of
• ourselves are disjointed and distorted…
• Largely determined by conditioning and
conditions.
• By 3 social maps – 3 Theories of
Determinism…

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• We can choose our actions…
• Consequences are governed by natural laws,
by principles.
• We do, however, have the power to choose
our attitudes and responses…
• Even in situations over which we have no
control.

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Our ability to Our ability to sense
stand apart from right from wrong
our selves and
examine our
thoughts, moods
and behaviour

Our ability to
visualize beyond our
experience and Our ability to act,
present reality independent of
external influences 24
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SERVICE

fairness

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• While we carry on with our day-to-
day lives,
• Take the time to pause, and tap into
the 4 human endowments.
• Use the freedom to choose to act in
small ways, to bring about the
changes we want in our lives.

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• We can choose our responses by
EXERCISING that freedom.
• If we keep doing that, eventually, with the
right choices…
• The responses we choose will begin to
influence the stimulus (what happens to us).

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•Habit #1 is the foundational
Habit.
•It is the KEY to implementing the
other Habits.
•The underlying principle of Habit
#1 is
TAKE RESPONSIBILITY
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https://youtu.be/UKlqGfbaJfw 37
• As human beings, we are responsible
for our own lives
• Which also means, we are able to
determine what will happen to us.
RESPONSE-ABILITY
• Ask yourself, how often do you let
other people decide how you should
feel?
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•Reactive people are often affected by the
environment/ social weather
•Are your feelings dependent or independent of
them?
•How many times have you allowed yourself to
become a victim of unfavourable
circumstances?
•Think about it.
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https://youtu.be/ssG6PD2MMGg
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• Having understood these liberating
truths,
• We must NEVER build our
emotional lives around the
weaknesses of other people.
• Otherwise, we disempower
ourselves to give power to their
weaknesses to mess our lives up!
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 NO ONE CAN
HURT YOU
WITHOUT
YOUR
CONSENT

Eleanor Roosevelt
1884-1962 43
•It is not what people that do to us
that hurts us…
•It’s our CHOSEN RESPONSES
that hurt us.

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Victor Frankl suggests:
•Three central values in life:
• The experiential
• The creative
• The attitudinal
•The highest central value of life is
attitudinal i.e. How WE respond in life
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•The concept is ~
•You and I have the capacity to
CHOOSE
our responses.

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• The difference between Positive
Thinking and Proactivity:
• Face reality
• Know the choices in facing the
circumstances and projections

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• The opposite of Proactive is
Reactive (React).
• We can usually tell if a person is
Proactive or Reactive by the words
that he or she uses.

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 I can’t  I can
 It’s not my fault  I’m sorry
 I have to  I choose to
 We have no other  Let’s look at all our
choice options
 They won’t let me  I will get this done
 There is nothing we  There must be
can do something we can do

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• Proactive people understand that
their lives are the product of ~
VALUES,
not feelings,
DECISIONS,
not conditions

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 Transition person
• A transition Person breaks unhealthy, harmful,
abusive, reactive or ineffective learned
behaviours and replaces them with proactive,
helpful, effective behaviours. This person models
positive behaviour and passes on effective habits
that strengthen and build others in positive
ways

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 Reactive Focus
When people focus on things they
cannot control, they have less
time and energy to spend on
things they can influence.
Consequently, their Circle of
Influence shrinks. 56
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As long as we are working in
our Circle of Concern, we
empower the things within it
to control us.

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• The circle where they have influence
• This is also where they focus all their
energies.

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 Proactive Focus
When people focus on
things they can
influence, they expand
their knowledge and
experience, and they
build trustworthiness.
As a result, their Circle
of Influence grows.

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• For Direct control problems, work on
your Habits 1, 2 and 3.
• For Indirect control problems change
your methods through Habits 4, 5 and 6.
• For No Control problems (past or
situational realities), learn to live with
them.

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https://youtu.be/0yL2UpecLJ4 66
•Which also means...
•We would have more and
more control over things we
are concerned about.

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• Before we totally shift our life focus to the
Inner Circle consider that...
• We are free to choose our actions, but not
“consequences”; which will follow natural
law.
• We need to acknowledge “mistakes”, correct
and learn from them.

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AT the very heart of our circle
of influence is our ability to
make and keep commitments
and promises

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 PRINCIPLES BEHIND
HABIT #1

Responsibility, choice, accountability,

initiative & resourcefulness

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 HABIT #1 PARADIGM
Effective: I am free to choose and am
ultimately responsible for my happiness
Ineffective: this is just the way things are
and there is not much I can do about it

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 To be PROACTIVE
•Start 1st by…
•Always treating people as if
they are PROACTIVE.

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 What should I do
Pause and respond based on
principles and desired results
Employ proactive language
Concentrate on your Circle of
Influence
Be a “transition person”
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 What can I expect
Better influence
Greater self-awareness
More initiative
Becoming a creative driver of your
own life

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• Test the principle of Proactivity for 30 days.
• Work only in your Circle of Influence.
• Make small commitments and keep them
Be a light, not a judge, be a model not a critic
and be a part of solution, not part of the
problem.

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 Reference Videos
Circle of influence vs Circle of Concern
• https://youtu.be/U3UM_m8MQOw

Habit 1 - become proactive action changes things

• https://youtu.be/ZZaWGyYynvE

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 Any Questions?

Business Studies Department, BUKC 77

 Thank You

Business Studies Department, BUKC 78