ATTITUDE TOWARDS

AGGRESSIVE PARENTS
DEFINITION OF TERMS {according to oxford
dictionary}
ATTITUDE: Is a settled way of thinking about
something or someone.
Aggression: {noun} a feeling of anger or
antipathy resulting in hostile or violent behavior
or readiness to attack or confront
Aggressive: {adjective} ready or likely to attach
or confront
Aggressions are usually triggered by
particular events, which may involve
circumstances that have led
the{client} parent to feel threatened
or frustrated.
The following signs may indicate that a parent could
potentially become aggressive or violent.
Appearance: that is carrying anything like a weapon.
Physical activity: restlessness or agitation, hostile facial
expression with sustained eye contact that connote “off
limit”.
Mood: angry, irritated, tense, distressed, difficult
controlling emotions.
Speech: loud, swearing or threatening.
DOS AND DON’TS OF
MANAGING
AGGRESSIVE
PARENTS
DOS:
Stay calm and keep your emotions in check. Adopt a
passive and non-threatening posture
{e.g. body at 45% angel to aggressor}.
Let the parent air his/her feeling and acknowledge them
Ask open minded question to keep the dialogue
Use space for self-protection i.e. position yourself close to
the exit.
DONTS:
Challenge or threaten a parent by tone of voice, eyes or body language
Say things that will escalate the aggression
Yell, even if the parent is yelling at you.
Rush the parent
Argue with the parent
Stay around if the client doesn’t calm down
Ignore verbal threats or warnings of violence
Tolerate violence
Try to disarm a person with a weapon or battle it alone.
TIPS FOR TEACHERS ON
DEALING WITH
DIFFICUIT PARENTS
1. No Surprises
THIS IS PROBABLY THE MOST IMPORTANT THING TO KEEP IN MIND
THROUGHOUT THE YEAR: MAKE SURE YOU KEEP PARENTS
APPRISED OF ANY ISSUES. IF YOU THINK A STUDENT HAS LEARNING
PROBLEMS AND SHOULD BE TESTED, DON'T WAIT UNTIL THE
ENTIRE YEAR HAS PASSED BEFORE SUGGESTING IT. YOU CAN
OFTEN AVOID PROBLEMS AT THE END OF THE YEAR IF PARENTS
HAVE ALREADY BEEN MADE AWARE OF YOUR CONCERNS.
BUT EVEN FOR TEACHERS WHO'VE DONE A GREAT JOB OF KEEPING
PARENTS ON BOARD, SOME PARENTS WILL "FORGET" THAT
THEY'VE BEEN INFORMED OF ANY PROBLEMS AT THE END OF THE
YEAR. IN THESE CASES, IT'S IMPORTANT TO KEEP A RECORD OF
EMAILS, PHONE CALLS, OR OTHER CONVERSATIONS YOU'VE HAD
REGARDING THE STUDENT'S ISSUES THROUGHOUT THE YEAR.
2. Meet Face-to-Face with Parents
INVITE THEM IN TO MEET WITH YOU RATHER
THAN TRYING TO RESOLVE A PROBLEM OVER THE
PHONE OR EMAIL. THAT WAY, YOU CAN SHOW
THEM SAMPLES OF THEIR CHILD'S WORK OR
RECORDS OF ATTENDANCE. YOU CAN ALSO SHARE
EVIDENCE OF THE TIMES YOU DISCUSSED THE
ISSUE WITH THEM. IN THE END, IT'S USUALLY
EASIER FOR ANGRY PARENTS TO SAY UNPLEASANT
THINGS ELECTRONICALLY THAN IN PERSON.
3. Alert Your Principal to the Situation
IF THE PARENTS HAVE ALREADY
CALLED TO COMPLAIN, THE
PRINCIPAL MAY WANT TO SIT IN ON
THE MEETING. IF NOT, SHE MAY
WANT TO BE AVAILABLE IF THE ISSUE
CAN'T BE RESOLVED BETWEEN YOU
AND THE PARENTS.
4. Listen and Ask Questions
SHAKE HANDS WITH THE PARENTS
WHO COME TO MEET WITH YOU AND
ASK THEM TO EXPLAIN WHAT
THEY'RE UNHAPPY ABOUT. WAIT
UNTIL THEY FINISH, AND DON'T
INTERRUPT UNLESS YOU'RE ASKING
FOR CLARIFICATION.
5. Try to Find Things You Agree On
MAKE SURE PARENTS UNDERSTAND THAT, AS
THE CHILD'S TEACHER, YOU'D LIKE TO SEE
HIM DO BETTER, TOO. BE CLEAR THAT YOUR
ROLE IS NOT TO PUNISH THE CHILD AT THE
END OF THE YEAR FOR NOT STUDYING, NOT
HANDING IN WORK, OR BEING ABSENT. YOUR
ROLE IS TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO MAKE
THEIR CHILD MORE SUCCESSFUL IN THE
FUTURE.
6. Don't Allow Yourself to Be Pressured
A FEW PARENTS MAY ASK A TEACHER TO CHANGE A
GRADE OR MOVE THEIR CHILD FORWARD EVEN IF
HE OR SHE HASN'T FULFILLED THE
REQUIREMENTS. YOU, OF COURSE, HAVE TO
ADHERE TO YOUR PROFESSIONAL ETHICS—AND
YOU DON'T WANT THE REPUTATION OF SOMEONE
WHO CAN BE MANIPULATED BY PARENTS. IF THEY
WANT TO, PARENTS ALWAYS HAVE THE OPTION TO
ESCALATE THE PROBLEM TO THE PRINCIPAL.
7. Know When the Conversation Is Over
IN MY EXPERIENCE, ONCE MOST DIFFICULT PARENTS HAVE
EXPRESSED THEIR UNHAPPINESS OR ANGER, YOU CAN ALL
CAN MOVE ON TO FIND A WORKABLE SOLUTION
TOGETHER. UNFORTUNATELY, THIS IS NOT THE CASE WITH
ALL PARENTS. IT'S FINE FOR PARENTS TO BE ANGRY, BUT IT
ISN'T OK FOR THEM TO BE ABUSIVE. IF THAT HAPPENS AND
IT'S CLEAR YOU'RE NOT GOING TO AGREE, IT'S TIME TO
BRING THE CONVERSATION TO A CLOSE. THEY MAY DECIDE
TO TAKE THEIR COMPLAINT TO THE PRINCIPAL, AND
THAT'S FINE. THAT'S HOW THE SYSTEM WORKS.
CONCLUSION
DURING YOUR CAREER, YOU'LL HAVE MANY
MEETINGS WITH PARENTS. MOST OF THEM WILL BE
EASY, GRATIFYING, AND PLEASANT—BUT A
HANDFUL WON'T BE. KNOWING HOW TO DEAL WITH
DIFFICULT PARENTS SHOULD BE PART OF EVERY
TEACHER'S SKILL SET, SO YOU CAN KEEP YOUR
COOL WHILE WORKING TO FIND A RESOLUTION
THAT'S IN THE STUDENT'S BEST INTERESTS.
MAY GOD HELP US ALL
IN JESUS NAME”
THANK YOU