Ninja health & safety

SHURIKEN, swords, and other piercing

weapons should NOT be wielded near sensitive
computer equipment, computer screens, water
coolers, or custodial staff.

Keep NOISE to a minimum. Whenever

nK!!!
possible, AVOID use of the following in
open-plan offices: STAY
A. Computer and/or telephone speakers SMART
B. Loud or distracting cellphone ringtones
C. Slow and/or painful killing methods STAY
SAFE
In case of emergency, keep
CORRIDORS and busy aisles clear. STAY
DO NOT block designated fire exits with
electronic equipment, paper or office
DEADLY
supplies, furniture, weapon stockpiles,
or dead bodies.

NUNCHAKU (nunchucks) should NOT be used in bathrooms, cubicles, or supply closets.

Use BREAKROOMS only to prepare meals

and refreshments, not homebrew poisons.
NEVER use the coffee machine to boil toads
or mushrooms without written permission.

Unless absolutely unavoidable, resolve

INTERDEPARTMENTAL VENDETTAS
only outside the building. Time slots can be
booked through the Ninja Resources office.

Management is always right: safe and tidy wins the fight!

Remember GNAT in all you do. Your ninja skills will see you through!

Good Ninja Always Tidy

Copyright ©2009 Ninjalistics. Created by Andrew Fitzpatrick.
Ninjalistics is your leading provider of ISO 9000-compliant
corporate espionage and assassination services. For further
guidance to the corporate ninja workplace, visit our site:
www.ninjalistics.com