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Official Reprimand

Attention, _________________________________________________________________________!
This form serves as notice of your official reprimand.

Issuer Consequence(s)
For [indicate duration] ___________ You shall conform to the
c Boss
 business days, following standard(s) of
c Supervisor
 work weeks, behavior:
c Supervisor’s boss
 work years,
c Project Manager c Total silence
 ever,
c Project Lead c Perfect punctuality at meetings
 ever, even in subsequent jobs
c Senior team member at other companies, c Absolute adherence to schedules
c Estranged office romantic partner c Sincere, non-ironic enthusiasm
the following office
c Sworn enemy c Loud proclamations of your
privilege(s) is/are denied you: offense upon greeting fellow
c Arch-nemesis
workers, visitors, and strangers
c Human Resources director c Reserved parking space
c Unquestioning obedience
c Use of the photocopier, fax, or
shredder for personal documents c Spineless subservience
Nature of error
c Use of the photocopier, fax, or c Truckling to your superiors’ every
c THOUGHT shredder for any part of your fleeting whim
c Use of the internet for personal This reprimand should make
reasons you feel [check all that apply]:
c Poor scheduling/punctuality
c Use of the coffee machine for
c Poor personal hygiene personal reasons c Ashamed  Confused
c Substandard performance c Use of your own coffee mug for c Guilty  Debased
c Disobedient/threatening behavior personal reasons c Grumpy  Paranoid
c Lackluster morale c Permission to speak to co-workers c Sneezy  Doomed
c Utter incompetence c Obligation of co-workers to care c Somewhat nauseated
when you speak to them
c Pyromania c Willing to amend your ways
c Cigarette breaks
c Lack of regard for safety c Willing to drop all resistance to
c Bathroom breaks authority
c Lack of regard for my safety
c Insulin breaks c Fired with a new determination to
c Theft of office equipment
c Natural light improve yourself
c Theft of stationery
c Oxygen c Fired
c Theft of my coffee mug
c Overflowing e-mail inbox
c Posting insulting comic or form Repentance and reform
c Sexual harassment To avoid future reprimands of this kind, you should:
c Not reciprocating my interest
c Sleeping in a meeting
c Arguing against me in a meeting _______________________________________________________________________
c Attempting murder in a meeting _______________________________________________________________________
c Humming
c Other [specify]:
Have a(n)
______________________________  nice  okay  unpleasant  penitent  very long
Copyright ©2008 Ninjalistics. Written by Gareth Hanrahan. Enduring harsh penance? Cheer up by completing the many helpful forms at

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