THE IDEAL MUSLIM HUSBAND

B. Aisha Lemu
A British Scholar & Writer

THE IDEAL MUSLIM HUSBAND

b( B. Aisha Lemu

B. Aisha Lemu
First Published 19 ! "e# Pri$ted 199%& I 99'. 1999 RePrinted 2007

Published b()# Islami* Edu*ati+$ Trust ,Publi*ati+$s Di-isi+$. P,M.B. //9& Mi$$a& Ni0er State.

Mu*h i$1 has.& bee$ s2illed& a$d mu*h breath s2e$t i$ de3i$i$0 the r+le +3 Muslim 4+me$& the ri0hts +3 Muslim 4+me$ the duties +3 Muslim 4+me$& a$d 4hat *+$stitutes a$ ideal Muslim 4i3e . Ma(be be*ause there has bee$ s+ mu*h misu$dersta$di$0 +3 the r+le +3 4+me$& 4e seem t+ 0i-e it s2e*ial em2hasis i$ le*tures a$d b++1s. H+4e-er si$*e me$ a$d 4+me$ are i$ter#de2e$da$t it is $+t 4ise t+ *+$*e$trate +$ +$e a$d remai$ sile$t ab+ut the +ther. The last time I 4as i$-ited t+ s2ea1 ab+ut 5The Ideal Muslim 6i3e5& I made a 2r+mise that m( $e7t assi0$me$t 4+uld be t+ 2re2are a le*ture +$ 5The Ideal Muslim Husba$d5. Ma$( me$ seem t+ 3eel that 4+me$3+l1.& a$d their 4i-es i$ 2arti*ular& sh+uld be ideal Muslims , 4hile the( themsel-es a$d their 3ell+4 me$ beha-e as the( li1e 4ith+ut re3ere$*e t+ the 8ur9 a$ a$d Su$$ah& a$d u$*halle$0ed b( the Shari9ah This 2a2er is there3+re i$te$ded t+ redress the bala$*e& t+ tur$ the s2+tli0ht +$ t+ the me$& s+ that the( ma( be a4are +3 the Islami* sta$dard 3+r a$ ideal husba$d& a$d tr( t+ rea*h that sta$dard as mu*h as the( 4ish their 4i-es t+ rea*h the sta$dard +3 a$ ideal Muslim 4i3e. The +b-i+us 2la*e t+ l++1 3+r these sta$dards +3 beha-i+ur is i$ the 8ur9a$ a$d Hadith. Let us there3+re start at the be0i$$i$0. H+4 d+es the ideal husba$d beha-e be3+re marria0e: A3ter all a ma$ d+es $+t t+tall( *ha$0e his *hara*ter 4ith e33e*t 3r+m his 4eddi$0 da(. The bride is ;+i$i$0 her li3e 4ith that +3 a$+ther 2ers+$ 4h+se 2ers+$alit( a$d habits ha-e bee$ i$ s+me de0ree alread( 3+rmed. 6hat the$ sh+uld be the beha-i+ur t+4ards 4+me$ +3 a (+u$0 ma$ be3+re marria0e:

Islam d+es $+t a**e2t the -ie4 *+mm+$ i$ 4ester$ se*ular s+*iet( that be3+re marria0e a (+u$0 ma$ is e72e*ted t+ 5s+4 his 4ild +ats5 # 4hether b( 3re<ue$ti$0 2r+stitutes +r b( slee2i$0 ar+u$d& +r ha-i$0 a$( 3+rm +3 5trial marria0e5. F+r all su*h a*ti-ities the 8ur9 a$ has 2res*ribed a le0al 2u$ishme$t +3 1== lashes. ,8ur9a$ /')/.. The 8ur9a$ m+re+-er sa(s)

I$ +ther 4+rds& the 1e( t+ su**ess i$ marria0e is see$ as the m+ral <ualit( +3 the 2art$er. The ideal Muslim bride0r++m there3+re 0+es i$t+ marria0e 4ith the res2+$sible attitude +3 a 2ers+$ establishi$0 a 3amil( +$ the best 2+ssible 3+u$dati+$ +3 l+-e a$d mutual *+m2assi+$& a$d $+t +3 i$3atuati+$ +-er beaut(& ambiti+$ 3+r 4ealth +r s+*ial 2+siti+$. The 8ur9a$ has des*ribed the marria0e relati+$shi2 i$ these terms>#

"and as for those who are unable to marry, let them live in continence until Allah grants them sufficiency out of His bounty.,. 5 ,8ur9a$ /')%%.
T+ assist (+u$0 ma$ i$ this situati+$ the Pr+2het i$ a Hadith re*+rded i$ Bu1hari 3urther ad-ised)

'Among His signs is the fact that He has created spouses from among yourselves, so that you may find tran!uility with them; and He has put love and mercy between you. "n that are sign for people who reflect" ,8ur9a$ %=)/1.
A$d a0ai$)

"Young men, those of you who can support a wife should marry, for it keeps you from looking at women and preserves your chastity; but those who cannot should fast, for it is a means of cooling passion, "
F+r th+se 4h+ ha-e the mea$s t+ 0et married& h+4 sh+uld the( 0+ ab+ut it: 6e ha-e me$ti+$ed that the m+dem 4ester$ 2ra*ti*e +3 ha-i$0 0irl 3rie$ds a$d trial marria0es is em2hati*all( u$la43ul 3+r Muslims. I$stead it is e72e*ted that the 3amil( a$d its 3rie$ds 4ill 2la( a bi0 r+le i$ 3i$di$0 suitable 2art$ers 3+r b+th their s+$s a$d dau0hters. This 2r+*ess +3 3i$di$0 +ut i$ detail ab+ut the *hara*ter a$d *ir*umsta$*es +3 the 2r+2+sed 2art$ers be3+re all+4i$0 the 3eeli$0s +3 the b+( a$d 0irl t+ be ar+used has se-eral ad-a$ta0es. Its e33e*t is t+ *ut +ut a l+t +3 the embarrassme$t a$d tem2tati+$ a$d hearta*he 4hi*h are *+mm+$ i$ the 4ester$ s(stem +3 *+urtshi2 a$d i$timate relati+$s be3+re marria0e. The b+( is e72e*ted t+ share 4ith his 2are$ts *ertai$ 2ri+rities i$ the t(2e +3 0irl he h+2es t+ marr(& a$d this is me$ti+$ed i$ a Hadith related b( Abu Huraira i$ 4hi*h the Pr+2het ad-ised)#

"#hey $wives% are garmentts for you. while you are garments for them" ,8ur9a$ /) 1 !.
Ha-i$0 s+u0ht his bride i$ a$ h+$+urable 4a(& a$d married her i$ the ma$$er 2res*ribed b( the Pr+2het # that is 4ith 2ubli* *elebrati+$ but the mi$imum +3 3uss a$d +ste$tati+$ # 4hat are the Muslim husba$d9s duties: His 3irst dut( is mai$te$a$*e a$d 2r+te*ti+$& a$d +-erall res2+$sibilit( 3+r the 4el3are +3 his 4i3e& 4hi*h is 2res*ribed i$ the 8ur9a$)

"&en shall take full care of women with the bounties which Allah has bestowed more abundantly on the former than on the latter, and with what they may spend out of their possessions ... " ,8ur9a$ ')%'.
This i$*ludes 3eedi$0& *l+thi$0 a$d shelter 3+r the 4i3e a$d 3+r a$( *hildre$ +3 the marria0e. This is a le0all( e$3+r*eable dut( 4hi*h remai$s e-e$ a3ter di-+r*e u$til tl1e e72ir( +3 the iddah +r e-e$ l+$0er i$ the -ie4 +3 s+me s*h+lars. Fi$a$*ial res2+$sibilit( 3+r the 3amil( there3+re rests s<uarel( +$ the husba$d& a$d the 4i3e has $+ dut( t+ *+$tribute t+ 3amil( e72e$ses u$less she has the mea$s a$d the 4ish t+ d+ s+.

'A woman ma( be sought for her wealth, her birth, her beauty or her religious character. ut do look for the religious woman. And if you do it for any other consideration ,your hands be rubbed in dirt. 5,Bu1bari a$d
Muslim.

The le0al +bli0ati+$s +3 a husba$d d+ $+t st+2 4ith 2r+-isi+$ +3 the basi* re<uireme$ts +3 mai$te$a$*e a$d 2r+te*ti+$. He is als+ e7*e2e*ted t+ 0i-e her *+m2a$( a$d marital relati+$s& a$d t+ a-+id d+i$0 a$(thi$0 that 4+uld harm her. These +bli0ati+$s are e$3+r*ed b( the Shari9ah. I3 a ma$ 3ails t+ mai$tai$ his 4i3e +r 3ails t+ -isit her 3+r m+re tha$ a *ertai$ 2eri+d +3 time& the 4i3e has 0r+u$ds t+ be 0ra$ted a di-+r*e b( a Shari9ah *+urt. Similarl(& i3 she *a$ 2r+-e t+ the *+urt that the husba$d is d+i$0 her harm ,idrar.& be it b( dri$1i$0 al*+h+l& +r beati$0 her 4ith+ut la43ul *ause& +r abusi$0 her +r her 2are$ts a$d s+ +$& she is e$titled t+ be 0ra$ted a di-+r*e. I$ $+$e +3 these *ases *a$ the husba$d *laim ba*1 a$( 2art +3 the d+4r( +r 2rese$ts he has 0i-e$ t+ the 4i3e. The husba$d is h+4e-er ur0ed i$ the 8ur9a$ t+ a-+id di-+r*e a$d tr( t+ 2reser-e marria0e e-e$ i3 it is $+t ideal. This is t+ be d+$e i$ the 3irst i$sta$*e b( e7er*isi$0 2atie$*e 4ith his 4i3e9s 3aults& The 8ur9a$ sa(s)

4i3e is i$ me$struati+$& but 4he$ she has 3i$ished me$struati+$ a$d $+t (et resumed marital relati+$s 4ith husba$d ,8ur9a$ ?@) I ..I$ +ther 4+rds di-+r*e is $+t t+ be 2r+$+u$*ed i$ a$0er +r at ra$d+m& but at a s2e*i3i* time 4he$ the husba$d is i$ *+$tr+l +3 his reas+$& a$d the 4i3e hersel3 is $+t i$ the state +3 em+ti+$al u2set that s+metime a**+m2a$ies me$struati+$. The husba$d is t+ *+$ti$ue 0++d treatme$t +3 the 4i3e e-e$ i3 di-+r*e is i$ the e$d de*ided u2+$. He is t+ 1ee2 a$d 3eed her a be3+re i$ his +4$ h+use u$til the e72ir( her iddah ,4aiti$0 2eri+d. 4ith+ut harassme$t& ,8ur9a$ ?@)1> ?@)?1. a$d t+ ma1e 2r+-isi+$ 3+r her a**+rdi$0 t+ his mea$s. He is $+t t+ ta1e ba*1 a$( +3 the 0i3ts he ma( ha-e 0i-e$ be be3+re +r duri$0 the marria0e)

"'ive with them on a footing of kindness and e!uity, lf you take a dislike to them, it may be that you dislike a thing while Allah brings about it a great deal of good",
,8ur9a$ ')19. The Pr+2het ,2ea*e be u2+$ him. als+ em2hasised the u$desirabilit( +3 di-+r*e i$ a Hadith 3+u$d i$ Abu Dau9d9s *+lle*ti+$)

"#he parties should either hold together on e!uitable terms or separate with kindness. "t is not lawful for you $men% to take back any of your gifts from your wives. " ,8ur9a$
/)//9. A$ the *+$trar(& the husba$d is t+ 0i-e her a 0i3t +r s+me 3+rm +3 mai$te$a$*e t+ sustai$ her a3ter di-+r*e ,8ur9a$ /)/'1. M+re+-er he is $+t t+ i$ter3ere i3 a3ter di-+r*e she 4ishes t+ marr( s+me+$e else)

"#he most hateful of all lawful things, in the sight of Allah, is divorce. "
The ideal husba$d sh+uld there3+re& i3 $eed arises& ma1e 3ull use +3 8ur9a$i* 2r+-isi+$s 3+r re*+$*iliati+$ a$d arbitrati+$& ,8ur9a$ ')%'. be3+re 2r+*eedi$0 4ith di-+r*e. It is t+ be $+ted that the Pr+2het # the ideal husba$d # $e-er di-+r*ed a$( +3 his 4i-es. I3 a ma$ d+es di-+r*e his 4i3e& he sh+uld 3+ll+4 the ste2s a22r+-ed i$ the 8ur9a$ a$d Su$$ah +3 0i-i$0 a re-+*able di-+r*e& +3 the t(2e that all+4s 3+r *++li$0 +33 a$d re*+$*iliati+$ be3+re it be*+mes 3i$al +$ the third 2r+$+u$*eme$t The di-+r*e is $+t t+ be 2r+$+u$*ed 4hile the

5 .. & And when you divorce women and they have reached the end of their waiting term, hinder them not from marrying other men if they have agreed with each other in a fair manner." ,8ur9a$ /)/%/.
The husba$d sh+uld als+ 1$+4 that a**+rdi$0 t+ the Shari9ah he is $+t the +$e t+ ha-e *ust+d( +3 his *hildre$ a3ter di-+r*e& *+$trar( t+ the *+mm+$ 2ra*ti*e. It is the 4i3e 4h+ is 0i-e$ 2ri+rit( i$ *ust+d( +3 *hildre$& i$ a**+rda$*e 4ith a Hadith related b( Amru b. Shu9aib i$ Ib$ Ma;ah& 4hi*h tells h+4 a 4+ma$ *ame t+ the Pr+2het a$d said)

"#ruly my belly served as a container for my son here, amd my breast served as a skin bag for him $to drink out of%, and my bosom served as a refuge for him; and now his father has divorced me, and he $also% desires to take him away from me." The Pr+2het said) "You have a better right to have him as long as you do no marry again."
I$ the Mali1i S*h++l +3 Islami* Buris2rude$*e& this rule is s(stematised t+ 0i-e 2ri+rit( i$ *ust+d( +3 *hildre$ t+ the m+ther a$d t+ @ +ther relati-es& 2re3erabl( +$ the m+ther9s side +3 the 3amil(& be3+re the *ust+d( *+uld be *laimed b( the 3ather. This *ust+d( lasts u$til 2ubert( 3+r a s+$ a$d u$til marria0e 3+r a dau0hter& 4hile the 3i$a$*ial res2+$sibilit( 3+r their mai$te$a$*e remai$s 4ith their 3ather. The 1$+4led0e +3 the $e*essit( +3 se2arati+$ 3r+m his *hildre$ must *ertai$l( a*t as a *he*1 +$ i$dis*rimmate di-+r*e +$ the 2art +3 the husba$d. It IS als+ t+ be b+r$ i$ mi$d that the husba$d is re<uired t+ be 3aith3ul i$ marria0e as mu*h as the 4i3e is. The 2u$ishme$t 3+r adulter( +3 a married 2ers+$& male +r 3emale& u$der the Shari9ah is death. The 3a*t that the 2u$ishme$t ma( ha22e$ $+t t+ be a22lied i$ this 4+rld at a 2arti*ular time +r 2la*e d+es $+t ma1e the si$ a$( less 0rie-+us i$ the si0ht +3 Allah. A si$ that is $+t e72iated i$ this 4+rld is a3ter all 0+i$0 t+ 3+ll+4 a 2ers+$ t+ the 0ra-e. There3+re the husba$d sh+uld $+t 3ail t+ 3+ll+4 Allah9s *+mma$d i$ 8ur9a$)

I3 3+r s+me seri+us reas+$ the husba$d *a$$+t ma$a0e 4ith his 3irst 4i3e but d+es $+t 4a$t t+ di-+r*e her& he is $+t 2r+hibited 3r+m *+$tra*ti$0 a$+ther marria0e& 2r+-ided it is d+$e i$ a le0al a$d h+$+urable 4a(. The 2ermissi+$ t+ marr( m+re tha$ +$e 4i3e at a time is h+4e-er *+$diti+$al)

5 ... "f you fear that you cannot do *ustice between them, then marry only one." ,8ur9a$ ')%.
This *+$diti+$ is +3te$ ta1e$ -er( li0htl( i$ this *+u$tr( 4here 2+l(0am( has l+$0 bee$ a s+*ial *ust+m. N+ 4+rds i$ the 8ur9a$& h+4e-er& are 4ith+ut mea$i$0& a$d this -erse sh+uld $+t be ta1e$ li0htl(. A 4ea1 husba$d 4ill $+t be res2e*ted a$d 4ill $+t a*t 3airl( bet4ee$ his 4i-es& 4hereb( his marr(i$0 m+re tha$ +$e is li1el( t+ lead t+ i$;usti*e& *+$sta$t disharm+$( a$d the brea1#u2 +3 his 3amil(& 4hi*h is $+t i$ his i$terests +r theirs +r i$ the i$terests +3 the Muslim Ummah. I3 ha-i$0 married m+re tha$ +$e& h+4e-er& a husba$d 3i$ds his heart i$*li$i$0 t+ +$e at the e72e$se +3 the +ther& he is 4ar$ed that this i$*li$ati+$ sh+uld $+t rea*h the sta0e +3 $e0le*t +3 the $eeds +3 the +ther 4i3e.

"And you will not he able to treat your wives with e!ual *ustice however much you may desire it. ut do not incline towards one to the e+clusion of the other, leaving her as it were in suspense." ,8ur9a$ ') 1/9.
This 4ar$i$0 a0ai$st i$;usti*e is str+$0l( rei$3+r*ed by the Hadith i$ 4hi*h Abu Huraira re2+rted that the Pr+2het said)

"#ell the believing men to lower their ga(e and to be mindful of their chastity) verily this will be most conducive to their purity # $and% verily Allah is aware of all that they do." ,8ur9a$
/')%=. Th+se me$ 4h+ *ruise ar+u$d i$ their *ars l++1i$0 3+r s*h++l 0irls t+ 2i*1 u2 are surel( dis0ra*i$0 themsel-es& a$d 3+r3eiti$0 all ri0hts t+ re<uire *hastit( +3 their 4i-es.

",hoever has two wives and does not treat them e!ually, shall come on the -ay of .esurrection with half his body hanging down." ,Tra$smitted b( Abu Da9ud& Nasa9i a$d Ib$Ma;ah..
6e ha-e s+ 3ar e7ami$ed the le0al 3rame4+r1 +3 marria0e a$d di-+r*e as +utli$ed mai$l( i$ the 8ur9a$.

! ?

This $+4 $eeds t+ be 3illed i$ 4ith illustrati+$ a$d elab+rati+$ dra4$ 3r+m the Su$$ah& si$*e the 8ur9a$ tells us) "You have in the Apostle of Allah a beautiful pattern of conduct for anyone whose hope is in Allah and the final -ay.5 ,8ur9a$ %%)/1. H+4 did the Pr+2het ,2ea*e be u2+$ him. the$& beha-e as a husba$d9: Ab-i+usl( he +bser-ed the le0al 3rame4+r1& but h+4 did he beha-e i$ his da(#t+C#da( relati+$shi2s 4ith his 4i-es: A l+t +3 i$3+rmati+$ is t+ be 0athered ab+ut this 3r+m the Hadith& b+th dire*tl( a$d i$dire*tl(& a$d als+ 3r+m the Sirah ,the Bi+0ra2h( +3 the Pr+2het.. His 0uidi$0 2ri$*i2le +$ the treatme$t +3 4i-es is stated i$ s+me 4ell 1$+4$ Ahadith su*h as the 3+ll+4i$0 3r+m Bu1hari a$d Muslim) "/rom among the believers are those who have the kindest disposition and are kindest to their families # such are those who show the most perfect faith. #he best among them are those who are kindest to their wives." H+4 did the Pr+2het himsel3 e7em2li3( this 1i$d$ess: Firstl( he 4as $+t a di33i*ult +r rem+te +r t(ra$$i*al husba$d +3 the t(2e 4h+ re0ard all h+useh+ld *h+res as 54+me$9s 4+r15. I$ a Hadith i$ Bu1hari& Aisha 4as as1ed b( AI#As4ad b. DaEid 4hat the Pr+2het used t+ d+ i$ his h+use. She re2lied) "He used to work for his family, that is, serve the family, and when prayer time came, he went out for prayer. 5 Ather Hadith tell us that he used t+ me$d his +4$ *l+thes. Se*+$dl( he did$9t ma1e a 3uss ab+ut 3++d. It is re*+rded i$ a Hadith 3r+m Abu Huraira i$ the *+lle*ti+$ +3 Muslim) "Allah's &essenger never found fault with food "f he liked something, he ate it, and if he disliked it, he *ust

abstained from it" # implying that he never complained about the food or its cooking. Aisha re2+rted that 4he$e-er she 4as si*1 the Pr+2het 4+uld *+me t+ her t+ sh+4 his s(m2ath(. N+r 4as he ashamed t+ let it be 1$+4$ that his l+-e 3+r his 4i3e 4as 0reater tha$ his l+-e 3+r a$( +ther huma$ bei$0. It is re*+rded i$ the Hadith *+lle*ti+$s +3 Bu1hari a$d Muslim that s+me+$e as1ed the Pr+2het) 56h+ am+$0 all 2e+2le is m+st bel+-ed b( (+u:5 A$d he said 5Aisha5. This l+-e a$d u$dersta$di$0 3+r Aisha did $+t e*li2se his hi0h re0ard 3+r his 3irst 4i3e Fhadi;ah& 4h+ had bee$ his +$l( 4i3e 3+r ab+ut /@ (ears u$til her death. Aisha re2+rted that he al4a(s treasured the mem+r( +3 Fhadi;ah 4h+ had su22+rted a$d e$*+ura0ed him thr+u0h the di33i*ult (ears i$ Me**a& a$d that he used re0ularl( t+ ma1e 0i3ts t+ Fhadi;ah9s *l+se 3rie$ds as a$ e72ressi+$ +3 his u$dimi$ished esteem a$d l+-e 3+r her. He $e-er held himsel3 al++3 3r+m his 4i-es as i3 the( 4ere by their $ature as 4+me$ i$3eri+r. A$ the *+$trar(& he i$*luded 52la(i$0 0ames 4ith +$e9s 4i3e5 as +$e +3 the le0itimate e$tertai$me$ts. A**+rdi$0 t+ a Hadith i$ Abu Da9ud& Ib$ Ma;ah a$d Baiha<i) 9) .. #here is no amusement which is praiseworthy e+cept three, namely training a horse, sporting with one's wife and shooting arrows with a bow. .. I$ illustrati+$ +3 this 2ra*ti*e& Aisha re*+rds that +$ m+re tha$ +$e +**asi+$ she a$d the Pr+2het ra$ ra*es a$d s+metimes she 4+$ a$d s+metimes he 4+$& M+st me$ +3 $+4ada(s *+$sider it 3ar be$eath their di0$it( t+ 2la( a$( s+rt +3 0ame 4ith their 4i-es& a$d their marria0es are the duller a$d 2++rer 3+r it. I thi$1 this is +$e +3 the 2r+blems 4e e$*+u$ter i$ the 4a( 4e lear$ ab+ut the li3e +3 the Pr+2het. M+st +3 the hist+r( b++1s d4ell +$ the 2+liti*al a$d militar( as2e*ts +3 the Pr+2het9s li3e& a$d his

2ers+$alit(& 4hi*h 4as +b-i+usl( -er( attra*ti-e& eludes us. 6e te$d 3+r this reas+$ t+ 2i*ture him as al4a(s seri+us& 4hile the Hadith i$3+rms us that alth+u0h he rarel( lau0hed al+ud& 5$+b+d( used t+ smile as mu*h as he did5. This is 3ull( i$ a**+rda$*e 4ith the Hadith) "0miling at your brother $&uslim% is charity'" The Pr+2het9s attitude t+4ards 3emale *hildre$ a$d 3emale edu*ati+$ is a beauti3ul elab+rati+$ +3 4hat is 3+u$d i$ the 8ur9a$. The 8ur9a$ $+t +$l( 3+rbade the Bahili((ah 2ra*ti*e +3 3emale i$3a$ti*ide& but e-e$ *+$dem$ed the *+mm+$ 2ra*ti*e +3 sh+4i$0 disa22+i$tme$t +r a$0er +-er the birth +3 a 3emale *hild. ,8ur9a$ 1?)@ #@9.. A Hadith related b( Ib$ Abbas i$ 3a*t e$*+ura0es the re-erse) ",hoever has a female child and does not bury her alive, nor hide her in contempt, nor prefers his male child over her, Allah will make him enter 1aradise." ,Abu Da9ud. The Pr+2het sh+4ed the 0reatest l+-e a$d a33e*ti+$ 3+r his 3emale *hildre$& 2arti*ularl( 3+r Fatima. Aisha related that) ",henever the 1rophet $peace be upon him% saw /atima he would welcome her, and rising from his seat would kiss her, and then taking her by the hand would seat her in his own seat.5 ,Bu1hari.. He de*reed that e-er( Muslim # male a$d 3emale # must as a dut( see1 1$+4led0e& a$d 2res*ribed edu*ati+$ 3+r all *hildre$ i$ the 3+ll+4i$0 4+rds) "2o present or gift of a parent, out of all the gifts and presents to a child, is superior to a good broad $general% education. 5

,Tirmidhi a$d Baiha<i..

He laid s2e*ial em2hasis +$ the edu*ati+$ +3 dau0hters) ",hoever brings up two sisters or two daughters, and gives them a broad education, and treats them well, and gives them in marriage, for him 1aradise." ,Abu Da9ud& Tirmidhi..
..

This *+$*er$ 3+r the edu*ati+$ +3 0irls 4as re3le*ted i$ his tea*hi$0 +3 Aisha& 4h+ 4as still a (+u$0 0irl 4he$ he married her a$d 4as +$l( 1 4he$ he died. She had a $atural abilit( 3+r lear$i$0 a$d a str+$0 se$se +3 reas+$i$0 a$d he tau0ht her as mu*h as she 4as read( t+ lear$. He 4as s+ im2ressed a$d 2leased 4ith her lear$i$0 that he e-e$ t+ld 2e+2le) "You can learn half your religion from this rosy3cheeked girl." He there3+re e$*+ura0ed 2e+2le t+ *+$sult her +$ reli0i+us matters. a$d a3ter his death she be*ame +$e +3 the ma;+r s+ur*es +3 Hadith. Fr+m all this 4e *a$ see that s+me 2e+2le9s resista$*e t+ all+4i$0 their dau0hters t+ ha-e a**ess t+ 1$+4led0e is $+t +$l( mis0uided but <uite *+$trar( t+ all the Pr+2het 2rea*hed a$d 2ra*tised. A$ ideal Muslim husba$d is there3+re e72e*ted t+ be dee2l( *+mmitted t+ a$d i$-+l-ed i$ the edu*ati+$ +3 all his *hildre$ #the dau0hters as mu*h as the s+$s. The Pr+2het9s res2e*t 3+r a 4i3e9s i$telli0e$*e a$d u$dersta$di$0 4as als+ re3le*ted i$ his readi$ess t+ *+$sult his 4i-es a$d t+ res2+$d t+ their 0++d ad-i*e. A$ i$sta$*e +3 this 2ra*ti*e is re*+rded +$ the +**asi+$ +3 the si0$i$0 +3 the Treat( +3 Hudaibi(ah. Ma$( +3 the Muslims 4ere relu*ta$t t+ a**e2t the Treat(. The( did $+t 4a$t t+ 0+ h+me 4ith+ut 2er3+rmi$0 2il0rima0e a$d the( *+$sidered s+me 2arts +3 the Treat( disad-a$ta0e+us t+ the Muslims. The( 4ere there3+re relu*ta$t t+ +be( his i$stru*ti+$s t+ slau0hter their sa*ri3i*ial Gamels a$d sha-e their heads& 4hi*h 4+uld s(mb+lise that the 2il0rima0e 4as +-er a$d the matter *l+sed. The Pr+2het 4ithdre4 t+ his te$t i$ 2er2le7it( a$d t+ld his 4i3e Umm Salamah 4hat had ha22e$ed. She ad-ised him) 'Go out and speak to no man until you have performed your sacrifice. 95The Pr+2het 3+ll+4ed her ad-i*e& a$d slau0htered the *amel *alli$0) " ismillah Allahu Akbar" i$ a l+ud -+i*e& 4hereu2+$

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the Muslims 3+r0+t their relu*ta$*e a$d ra*ed t+ ma1e their +4$ sa*ri3i*es. The 2rese$*e +3 Umm Salamah +$ this ;+ur$e( e7em2li3ies a$+ther as2e*t +3 the Pr+2het9s deali$0s 4ith his 4i-es. A$e +r m+re +3 them alm+st i$-ariabl( a**+m2a$ied him +$ his ;+ur$e(s a$d *am2ai0$s. T+ e$sure 3air$ess the( 4+uld dra4 l+ts as t+ 4hi*h 4i3e +r 4i-es 4+uld a**+m2a$( him. His 4i-es 4ere thus $+t 1e2t l+*1ed u2 s+ that the( *+uld$9t e72erie$*e 4hat 4as 0+i$0 +$ i$ the +utside 4+rld. The( 4+re their m+dest dress ,hi;ab. a$d 4e$t +ut a$d sa4 e-er(thi$0 that 4as 0+i$0 +$& a$d themsel-es 2arti*i2ated 4he$ $e*essar(& 3+r e7am2le i$ $ursi$0 the 4+u$ded +$ the battle3ields.

4mar once criticised the 1rophet's wife 0audah for going out, saying he had recognised her in the street. 0o she appealed to the 1rophet for support and he supported her saying) ",omen have the right to go out for their needs." $2arrated by Aisha in ukhari% 0imilarly the 1rophet allowed his wives and other women to go out to the mos!ues for their prayers. He also advised other men) "-o not prevent the female servants of Allah from going to the houses of Allah $i.e. mos!ues%," $&uslim%.
The ideal Muslim husba$d there3+re d+es $+t im2+se restri*ti+$s +$ his 4i3e 0reater tha$ th+se im2+sed b( Allah& +r b( the Pr+2het +$ his +4$ 3amil(. All the 3+re0+i$0 i$di*ate that the 4+ma$ 4h+ is married t+ a$ ideal Muslim husba$d is 2r+te*ted but $+t su22ressed& a$d is there3+re li1el( t+ be -er( ha22( a$d *+$te$ted. H+4e-er& the Muslim husba$d is $+t e72e*ted t+ 2lease his 4i3e at all *+st& i3 4hat 2leases her ma( be 4r+$0 +r a0ai$st her i$terests +r the i$terests +3 the 3amil(. The 8ur9a$ sa(s)

"5 you who have attained to faith6 ward of from yourselves and your families that fire. $of the hereafter% whose fuel is human beings and stones."$7ur'an 88)8%

I$ this res2e*t a husba$d has a dut( t+ e$sure that his 4i3e is 3ull( edu*ated as a Muslim. I3 this has bee$ $e0le*ted i$ her 2are$ts9 h+me he must ta1e $e*essar( ste2s t+ remed( it& either b( tea*hi$0 her himsel3 +r b( arra$0i$0 3+r her Islami* edu*ati+$ b( +ther mea$s. The husba$d is e72e*ted t+ 0i-e leadershi2 i$ the 3amil(. 6e ha-e see$ that this 3+rm +3 leadershi2 is $+t di*tat+rshi2 +r t(ra$$(& The 4ise husba$d 4ill& as i$di*ated& *+$sult his 4i3e +$ im2+rta$t matters *+$*er$i$0 the 3amil(& a$d i3 he sees her ad-i*e is 0++d& a**e2t it. H+4e-er& Islam has 0i-e$ the ma$ auth+rit( as the head +3 the 3amil( a$d he is e72e*ted t+ abide b( the 8ur9a$ a$d Su$$ah a$d e$dea-+ur t+ e$sure that he a$d his 3amil( d+ $+t -i+late Islami* $+rms +3 beha-i+ur. The 1i$d treatme$t re<uired t+4ards a 4i3e sh+uld $+t there3+re i$*lude *+$d+$i$0 her misbeha-i+ur. The 8ur9a$ has 2res*ribed s2e*i3i* 0raded series +3 three ste2s 4hi*h the husba$d sh+uld ta1e i3 the 4i3e sh+4s b( her beha-i+ur that she is rebelli$0 a0ai$st Islami* $+rms +3 *+$du*t. His 3irst ste2 sh+uld be t+ s2ea1 t+ her seri+usl( ab+ut the im2li*ati+$ a$d li1el( *+$se<ue$*es +3 4hat she is d+i$0. I3 she 3ails t+ res2+$d t+ this si$*ere adm+$iti+$& his $e7t ste2 is t+ sus2e$d marital relati+$s 4ith her 3+r a 2eri+d +3 time. I3 this ste2 als+ 3ails he is 2ermitted t+ beat her li0htl( as a 3i$al a*t +3 *+rre*ti+$. I3 she the$ *+m2lies the husba$d sh+uld ta1e $+ 3urther a*ti+$ a0ai$st her ,8ur9a$ ')%'.. 9This beati$0 is the last res+rt& a$d $+t the 3irst +$e> a$d the Pr+2het ,2ea*e be u2+$ him. 2la*ed s+me limitati+$s +$ it& as 3+ll+4 ,a. It sh+uld $+t be +$ the 3a*e +r +$ a$( +3 the easil( i$;ured 2art +39 the b+d(> ,b. It sh+uld $+t be hard e$+u0h t+ *ause 2ai$ +r i$;ur( +r lea-e a mar1. The Pr+2het i$di*ated that i3 a ma$ must beat his 4i3e it sh+uld be more +r less s(mb+li*& 4ith s+methi$0 li1e a t++thbrush.

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The Pr+2het himsel3 -er( mu*h disli1ed the beati$0 +3 4i-es& a$d $e-er beat a$( +3 his +4$. I$ Abu Da9ud9s *+lle*ti+$ +3 Hadith he is re2+rted b( La<it b. Habrah t+ ha-e said)

''Admonish your wife, and if there be any good in her she will receive it; and beat not your wife like a slave. "
I$ a$+ther Hadith 3r+m A(as b. Abdullah& he s2e*i3i*all( said)

"-o not beat Allah's female servants (i.e. women%" (Abu Da9ud& Ib$ Ma;ah..
I$ Trimidhi9s *+lle*ti+$ is a$+ther Hadith related b( Amru b. al# Ah4as)

He is not strong who throws people down, but he is strong among us who controls himself when angry." ,Abu Huraira i$ Bu1hari a$d Muslim.. Aisha +bser-ed this sel3 *+$tr+l i$ the Pr+2het9s beha-i+ur ) #he 1rophet $pbuh%, never beat any of his wives or servants; in fact he did not strike anything with his hand e+cept in the cause of Allah, or when the prohibitions of Allah were violated, and he retaliated on behalf of Allah. "
The Ideal Muslim husba$d there3+re stri-es t+ emulate the Pr+2het9s 2ra*ti*e b( a-+idi$0 beati$0 *+m2letel( a$d dis*+ura0i$0 it i$ +thers. It is $+t at all be*+mi$0 3+r a Muslim t+ be a 4i3e#beater i$ de3ia$*e +3 the Pr+2het9s e72li*it disli1e +3 the 2ra*ti*e. This bri$0s us t+ a$+ther i$teresti$0 as2e*t +3 the Pr+2het9s relati+$shi2 4ith his 4i-es. He a22are$tl( all+4ed his 4i-es t+ d+ 4hat is *alled 5a$s4eri$0 ba*15 b( me$ 4h+ thi$1 that 4+me$ li1e *hildre$& sh+uld be see$ but $+t heard. There are se-eral re*+rded i$sta$*es +3 the Pr+2het9s *+m2a$i+$s rem+$strati$0 4ith him +r 4ith his 4i-es ab+ut this 2ra*ti*e. Ne-ertheless he *h+se t+ all+4 his 4i-es t+ s2ea1 their mi$ds. A$ i$*ide$t related i$ Ib$ Isha<9s Sirat "asul Allah ,a$ earl( bi+0ra2h( +3 the Pr+2het. ma1es i$teresti$0 readi$0)

''And en*oin on one another goodness towards women; verily they are married to you) you have no power over them at all unless they come in for a flagrantly filthy action; but if they are devoted to you, then seek no way against them. And verily, you have rights over your women and your women have rights over you"
The Muslim husba$d there3+re has $+ ri0ht t+ beat his 4i3e dis*rimi$atel( +r habituall( 3+r 2ett( +33e$*es& a$d i3 he d+es s+ the 4i3e has a ri0ht t+ see1 di-+r*e b( a Shari9ah *+urt. Similarl(& as 4e *a$ see& Islam has $+t auth+rised me$ t+ beat u2 their 4i-es i$ the 4a( 4e s+metimes 3i$d them d+i$0& s+ that the 2++r 4i3e *+mes +ut i$;ured l++1i$0 as i3 the( had d+$e te$ r+u$ds i$ a b+7i$0#ri$0. The 2he$+me$+$ +3 4i3e#beati$0 is $+t 2e*uliar t+ Muslims # it is u$d i$ all 2arts +3 the 4+rld am+$0 *ertai$ t(2es +3 me$. H+4e-er& s+me Muslims u$;ustl( *laim that the( ha-e reli0i+us sa$*ti+$ 4he$ the( beat their 4i-es& 4hile i$ m+st *ases the( are beati$0 them +$l( be*ause the( themsel-es are dru$1& +r brutal b( $ature& +r ;ust i$ a bad tem2er. Bad tem2er is t+ be *+$tr+lled& $+t -e$ted +$ the 4ea1er se7. The Pr+2het re3erred t+ this i$ a$+ther Hadith 4he$ he said)

9ne day 4mar rebuked his wife for something and she sharply answered him back) and when he e+postulated with her she replied that the wives of the 1rophet were in the habit of answering him back so why should she not do the same. "And there is one of them", she added, meaning their daughter $Hafsah%, "who speaks her mind unabashed from morning till night') :reatly troubled by
"e#t+ld i$ 5Muhammad # his Li3e based +$ the Earliest S+ur*es5 b( Marti$ Li$0s ,Islami* Trust S+*iet(& Ie+r0e Alle$ & U$4i$ 19 %.

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this. 4mar went to Hafsah, who did not deny that what her mother said was true. "You have neither the grace of Aisha nor the beauty of ;ainab," he said, hoping to shake her self3confidence; and when these words seemed to have no effect, he added: "Are you so sure, that if you anger the 1rophet, Allah will not destroy you in His anger<" #hen he went to his cousin 4mm 0alamah $another wife of the 1rophet% and said) ""s it true that you speak your minds to Allah's &essenger and answer him without respect" " y all that is wonderful, " said 4mm 0alamah, ',hatt call have you to come between Allah's &essenger and his wives< Yes, by :od, we speak to him our minds, and if he allows us to do so that his is affair, and if he forbids us he will find us more obedient to him than we are to you. 4mar then realised he had gone too far and withdrew. I$ this a$e*d+te 4e *a$ *learl( hear the -+i*es +3 4+me$ 4h+ res2e*t their husba$d $+t be*ause the( are a3raid +3 him +r +ut +3 h(2+*ri*(& but +ut +3 0e$ui$e admirati+$ a$d l+-e. The 3a*t that he all+4ed them t+ s2ea1 their mi$ds sh+4s that the Pr+2het $e-er re0arded 4+me$ as sla-es +r se*+$d *lass *itiEe$s but as huma$ bei$0 t+ 4h+m Allah has 0i-e$ reas+$ a$d the abilit( t+ disti$0uish ri0ht 3r+m 4r+$0 as He has 0i-e$ them t+ me$. Aisha 4e$t 3urther i$ a Hadith t+ sa( that 4he$ the Pr+2het t+ld her s+methi$0 she 4+uld <uesti+$ him *l+sel( ab+ut it s+ that she *+uld u$dersta$d its ;usti3i*ati+$ be3+re she 4+uld be satis3ied. The Pr+2het did $+t tell her she had $+ ri0ht t+ *r+ss <uesti+$ him be*ause he 4as a Pr+2het a$d a ma$& 4hile she 4as +$l( a (+u$0 4+ma$. It a22ears +$ the *+$trar( that he a22re*iated her *irit*al 3a*ult( a$d *lear thi$1i$0. Fr+m this 4e *a$ see the Pr+2het had su*h *alm i$$er *ertai$t( a$d $atural leadershi2 <ualities that he did $+t $eed t+ assert himsel3 +-er his 4i-es& +r be +$ the de3e$si-e a0ai$st them& Th+se me$ 4h+ beha-e li1e t(ra$ts i$ the h+me& 4h+ assert their rule i$ a$ arbitrar( +r -i+le$t ma$$er& are usuall( the 4ea1 +$es 4h+ a*tuall( su33er 3r+m

hidde$ i$3eri+rit( *+r$2le7s a$d are a3raid +3 bei$0 sh+4$ u2 as me$tall( +r m+rall( i$3eri+r t+ their 4i-es. T+ 3+restall this the( 2h(si*all( 3ri0hte$ +r threate$ their 4i-es. 6h+ are the$ a3raid t+ +2e$ their m+uths i$ their husba$d9s 2rese$*e& let al+$e t+ disa0ree 4ith him. A$+ther i$*ide$t illustrates h+4 the Pr+2het asserted his leadershi2 +3 his 3amil( 4ith+ut harsh 4+rds +r -i+le$*e. This is re-ealed i$ the 4a( he treated his 4i-es 4he$ the( be*ame t++ dema$di$0 +3 the *+m3+rts +3 this 4+rld. Aisha related that be3+re the *a2ture +3 the +asis +3 Fha(bar she had $+t 1$+4$ 4hat it 4as t+ eat her 3ill +3 dates. The Pr+2het9s 4i-es& 3ull( a4are +3 the 0e$eral 2+-ert( +3 the Muslims i$ Medi$a& as1ed +$l( 3+r their m+st basi* $eeds& A3ter the *a2ture +3 Fha(bar 4ith its ri*h a0ri*ultural 2r+du*e& the Muslims 4ere better +33& a$d the Pr+2het 4as able t+ 0i-e his 4i-es s+me 2rese$ts& a$d the( 4ere $+t sl+4 i$ lear$i$0 t+ as1 3+r m+re *+m3+rts. This led t+ 2r+blems be*ause i$ 3air$ess& 4hat 4as 0i-e$ t+ +$e sh+uld be 0i-e$ t+ all& a$d *+$siderable rese$tme$t am+$0 s+me +3 his 4i-es 4hi*h disru2ted the 2ea*e +3 the h+useh+ld. 6he$ his ad-i*e t+ them 4as $+t heeded he 3+ll+4ed the $e7t 8ur9a$i* ste2 a$d 4ithdre4 himsel3 3r+m them all a$d sta(ed i$ a r++3ed -era$dah that 4as the +$l( r++m he had a2art 3r+m his 4i-es9 a2artme$ts. "um+ur s++$ s2read that the Pr+2het had di-+r*ed his 4i-es& a$d the 4i-es& i$ sus2e$se& re0retted bitterl( their dema$ds +$ him. He the$ let it be 1$+4$ th+u0h Umar that he had $+t di-+r*ed them but that he did $+t 4ish t+ see a$( +3 them u$til a 3ull lu$ar m+$th had ela2sed. At the e$d +3 the m+$th he as1ed his 4i-es +$e b( +$e t+ ma1e their +4$ *h+i*e i$ a**+rda$*e 4ith $e4l(#re-ealed -erses +3 the 8ur9a$) "9 1rophet6 0ay to your wives) if you desire but the life of this world and its charms, then come and " will bestow its

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goods upon you, and will release you with a fair release. this e$d a <uesti+$$aire 4asI2assed t+ a ra$d+m 0r+u2 +3 %@ edu*ated ut 4+me$ if you desire Allah andas1i$0 His &essenger the abode Muslim married +$es& them t+ and ide$tit( 4hat of the( the Hereafter, then im2+rta$t verily Allah has i$ laid in store for you a *+$sidered t+ be the m+st <ualities a husba$d. mighty for such ofs*+red you as do good" ==)l>3 The 3i-e m+streward, im2+rta$t 8ualities / 2+i$ts ea*h $7ur'an a$d the 3i-e $e7t m+st ?@%. im2+rta$t <ualities s*+red 1 2+i$t ea*h. Aishaisre2lied The result sh+4$ 4ith+ut bel+4. hesitati+$) "Aerily, " desire Allah. and His &essenger and the abode of +3 the Hereafter" a$d there 4as $+t +$e +3 6+me$9s Arder Pri+rit( i$ the Desirable his 4i-es 4h+ did $+t *h++se the same. These e-e$ts are related i$ a 8ualities +3 a$ Ideal Muslim Husba$d
$umber +3 Hadith b++1s& i$*ludi$0 Bu1hari a$d Muslim.9 Here 4e see a husba$d 4h+ i$ s2ite +3 his l+-e a$d s(m2ath( 3+r his 4i-es& 4+uld $+t be *arried a4a( t+ *+mmit i$;usti*e bet4ee$ them& $+t 2ut himsel3 i$t+ di33i*ulties +r 4r+$0#d+i$0 i$ +rder t+ satis3( their desires be(+$d 4hat 4as $e*essar(. He 4as $+t read( 3+r the r+le +3 the 5he$#2e*1ed husba$d.5 His 3irm$ess i$ the matter <ui*1l( made his 4i-es see it i$ its 2r+2er 2ers2e*ti-e& a$d 2ea*e 4as rest+red t+ the h+useh+ld 4ith+ut re*+urse t+ di-+r*e +r e-e$ a harsh 4+rd . It is i$*ide$ts li1e these that ma1e it <uite *lear 4h( the Pr+2het ,2.b.u.h. is held u2 as a beauti3ul e7am2le t+ Muslims i$ e-er( as2e*t +3 his li3e. There are +3 *+urse $umer+us +ther 3a*ets +3 his 2ers+$alit( a$d beha-i+ur 4hi*h *+$tributed t+ ma1i$0 him a$ ideal husba$d. He 4as +3 *+urse *lea$ a$d 2ure b+th i$ his th+u0hts a$d 2ers+$& a$d -er( 0e$er+us i$ a**+rda$*e 4ith his +4$ sa(i$0)

56+me$9s a33air5. I$ +ur +4$ s+*iet( t+da( this is a *+mm+$ 2he$+me$+$ 4here it is the m+ther 4h+ +3te$ 2la(s a ma;+r r+le i$ e$suri$0 that the *hildre$ are *l+thed a$d *ared 3+r& that their s*h++l 3ees are 2aid& that the( lear$ 0++d beha-i+ur a$d s+ +$. 6hile it is 0++d that the m+ther sh+4s this l+-e a$d *+$*er$& it is $+t a22r+-ed 3+r the 3ather t+ aba$d+$ his +4$ m+ral a$d 3i$a$*ial res2+$sibilities a$d i0$+re the 2r+2er edu*ati+$ a$d u2bri$0i$0 +3 his *hildre$. 6e ha-e me$ti+$ed the Pr+2het9s +4$ r+le i$ the u2bri$0i$0 +3 his +4$ dau0hters ,it 4as +$l( the dau0hters that sur-i-ed t+ maturit(. a$d his em2hasis +$ edu*ati+$ 3+r b+th se7es. There are als+ $umer+us Hadith i$di*ati$0 his l+-e 3+r *hildre$ a$d his 2ra*ti*e +3 sh+4i$0 his l+-e 3+r them& F+r e7am2le i$ a Hadith 3r+m Abu Huraira it is related as 3+ll+4s)

"#he 1rophet of Allah kissed his grandson Hassan the son of Ali in the presence of A!ra' b. Habis, whereupon A!ra' said) "Aerily, " have children, and yet " have never kissed any of them" #he 1rophet looked towards him and said) ",hat can " do for you if Allah has taken away mercy from your heart< He that shows no mercy shall have no mercy shown to him. 5,Bu1hari a$d Muslim..
The Muslim 3amil( is there3+re ideall( a -er( u$ited 3amil(. Mutual u$dersta$di$0 bet4ee$ husba$d a$d 4i3e lies at the r++t +3 it. The Islami* u2bri$0i$0 +3 the *hildre$ is +$e +3 its m+st im2+rta$t 3u$*ti+$s. F+r it t+ su**eed as the basi* u$it +3 the Muslim Ummah b+th husba$d a$d 4i3e $eed t+ 1$+4 their duties a$d t+ 2ra*ti*e sel3 *+$tr+l i$ tr(i$0 t+ abide b( the Islami* *+de +3 *+$du*t 4ithi$ the 3amil(. I 4ish t+ dra4 this 2a2er t+ a *l+se b( a22r+a*hi$0 the sub;e*t brie3l( 3r+m a di33ere$t a$0le. 6e ha-e s+ 3ar l++1ed at the duties +3 the Muslim husba$d as s2elled +ut i$ the 8ur9a$ a$d see$ h+4 these 2+i$ts 4ere e72a$ded a$d added t+ i$ the Su$$ah. 6e ha-e als+ ta1e$ re*+rded i$*ide$ts i$ the li3e +3 the Pr+2het as a$ illustrati+$ +3 a$ ideal Muslim husba$d i$ a*ti+$. Lastl( I a22r+a*hed the <uesti+$ 56hat is a$ ideal Musli$ husba$d5 b( as1i$0 Muslim 4+me$ t+ tell me 4hat the( th+u0ht. T+
1#

5Jerily, Allah is pure and loves the pure, is clean and loves the clean, is beneficient and loves the beneficient, is generous and loves the generous." ,Tirmidhi.
A$+ther -er( im2+rta$t *hara*teristi* 4as his l+-e +3 *hildre$. L+-e +3 her +4$ *hildre$ is alm+st aut+mati* t+ a m+ther a$d 4ith that l+-e 0+es a *are a$d *+$*er$ 3+r their 4el3are that lasts till her d(i$0 da(. S+me me$ d+ $+t share this l+-e 3+r their *hildre$ i$ a$(thi$0 li1e the same de0ree& a$d *+$sider the *hildre$ t+ be Fr+ KK #9Muhammad # his Li3e based +$ the Earliest S+ur*e.# b( Marti$ Li$0s ,Islami* Trust S+*iet(& Ie+r0e Alle$ & U$4i$ 19 %.
1"

P+i$ts A Pi+us Muslim Truth3ul$ess a$d H+$est( A 0++d leader Busti*e a$d 3air$ess L+-e +3 *hildre$ Fi$d$ess a$d *+$siderati+$ "eadi$ess t+ *+$sult his 4i3e I++d Ma$$ers Ghastit( a$d 0++d m+rals Trust4+rthi$ess a$d reliabilit( '9 '! '= % %! %1 %= /9 /? /@

A-+ids <uarrelli$0 a$d beati$0 Glea$ habits Stre$0th +3 mi$d a$d 4ill Ie$tle$ess Ie$er+sit( A l+-i$0 $ature Abilit( t+ be *+$te$ted 4ith +$e 4i3e Se$se +3 hum+ur "eas+$able$ess Firm$ess I$telli0e$*e Seri+us$ess I++d l++1s
20

// /= 19 1! 1? 1@ 1% 11 9 ! ?

P+i$t9s

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This list +3 <ualities is $+t +3 *+urse e7hausti-e& a$d are a 3e4 im2+rta$t +missi+$s. H+4e-er& it raises ma$( i$teresti$0 2+i$ts 3+r +ur br+thers t+ *+$sider i$ their e$dea-+ur t+ <uali3( as a 2+te$tial ideal Muslim husba$d. Th+se 4h+ 3eared that b( adheri$0 t+ Islami* 2iet( a$d m+ral sta$dards the( 4+uld 3ri0hte$ 4+me$ a4a(& 4ill see that the( are a*tuall( at the t+2 +3 the lea0ue. This i$3+rmati+$ als+ *+$3irms the $atural +rder +3 thi$0s re3erred t+ a$d u2held i$ the 8ur9a$& i$ that 4+me$ d+ a22are$tl( 4a$t me$ 3+l1 t+ lead a$d $+t be led. Leadershi2 ta1es a hi0h 2+siti+$ at Number %. But that leadershi2 has t+ be deser-ed a$d <uali3ied b( all the +ther <ualities me$ti+$ed i$ the u22er 2art +3 the list su*h as 2iet( truth3ul$ess& 3air$ess& 1i$d$ess& *+$sultati+$& 0++d ma$$ers& 0++d m+rals a$d s+ +$. It is i$teresti$0 t+ 0+ +-er i$ +$e9s mi$d the <ualities +3 the Pr+2het me$ti+$ed i$ the earlier 2art +3 this 2a2er a$d mat*h them 4ith this list t+ see h+4 3ar the Pr+2het9s beha-i+ur t+ his 4i-es dem+$strates 2er3e*tl( th+se <ualities t+ 4hi*h 4+me$ 0i-e 2ri+rit(. There3+re a$( ma$ 4h+ 4a$ts t+ ma1e a su**ess +3 his marria0e *a$$+t 0+ 4r+$0 i3 he ta1es as his m+del a$d e7am2le the 2ra*ti*e +3 the blessed Pr+2het. F+r +ur br+thers I 2ra( 3+r Allah t+ 0i-e them the 3aith a$d m+ral stre$0th t+ attai$ th+se 0reat <ualities a$d thereb( ma1e a su**ess +3 their marria0es. F+r +ur sisters I 2ra( 3+r Allah9s 0uida$*e t+ ma1e ea*h +$e +3 us 4+rth( +3 bei$0 the 4i3e +3 a$ ideal Muslim husba$d.

21

TITLE AND AUTHOR 1. $unior !sla%ic Studies (B. A &'()* Boo+ 1 ,a-hid and .i/h Boo+ 2A &essons on the 0ur1an Boo+ 2B 0ur1anic Arabic Boo+ 2 ,ahdhib and Sirah A 3ritical &oo+ at the ,heory o4 '5olution (B. A &'()* What the Bible says about (uha%%ad (A 6''6A,* ,he (oral ,eachin7s o4 !sla% ((. S!66!8* !sla%ic 3iti9enshi: and (oral Res:onsibility (B. A &'()* 'ducation !sla%ic 3once:ts and (odern Society (B. A &'()* (uha%%ad1s Pro:hethood; An Analytical <ie- ($. BA6AW!1 A 6e7ree abo5e the% (B. A. &' ()* #. !S&A(; ,he Basic ,ruths (=. S. !6R!S* !sla% and Alcohol (B. A. &'()* 3hrist in !sla% (A 6''6A,* 12. Reconstruction o4 the (ethodolo7y o4 ,eachin7 Science and Arts (A.$. 8>'?A@*. !sla% 4or A4rica (S. A &'()* ,he !deal (usli% Ausband (B. A &'()* AaBB da )%ra A Sau+a+e (S. A. &'()* Asiran ,sa4i (()AA((A6 WAll da S. A &'()* $a7orar ?oyar-a (S. A. &'()* A Boo+ o4 .astin7 (S. A. &'()* !sla%ic Studies 4or Senior Secondary School Boo+ 2 (B. A &'()* &aCity, (oderation and 'Ctre%is% in !sla% (B. A. &'()* 21. ,he Risala (,reatise on (ali+i &a- o4 Abdullah !bn Daya Al-0ayra-ani* ,ranslated by $8S'PA ?'@@>. $u91u A%%ah (". A. &'()* (isconce:tions about !sla% (()AA((A6 AA('6* (isinter:retations o4 the 0ur1an (()AA((A6 AA('6*. ,he Alche%y o4 Aa::iness (A&-=AADDA&!* Pro:het (uha%%ad; Blessin7 4or (an+ind Ani%als in !sla% (B. A. &'()* Wo%en in !sla% and (usli% Society (AASSA@ ,)RAB* &et us reason to7ether (()AA((A6 AA('6* $esus; A Pro:het o4 !sla% (S)&A!(A@ AA('6 ().ASSiR Ste:s on the ri7ht Path ('d. B. A &'() E A. A. 68&&'> (u yi ,unani ,are (,ranslated by ?. A(!@*

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!sla%ic 'ducation ,rust (Publication di5ision*, P. A. B. 22#, (inna, @i7er State, @i7eria