This script demonstrates the following skill set:

-Technical Screenwriting Form

-Original premise and characters within standard 3 Act structure, knowing and using
conventions.
--Subtext –shining example appropriately color coded in yellow
-One of many puns – dark green
-True Love- Red
-Irresistible Catch Phrases (An advertising mascots dream!)- Next set of Red text
-Irony-colour coded in blue
-Suspense/dark humor-color coded Grey
-A borderline amazing idea for a hot new product… “cup- bar”, one of many of
Walen and Nesillina’s spin off merchandise – colour coded light green
-Effective 3 part symbolism – clown foreshadows and adds drama as he marks
beginning, middle, and approaching end - underlined
-Action – red font

“WALEN MONOXOLUS AND THE LONELY CIRCUS” – A SCREEN PLAY BY GREGORY

TYLER

1. EXT. SCHOOL YARD. DAY.

HATWOMAN is underneath a dumpster on a dolly, scrubbing it

with a toothbrush. She wears a janitors outfit and a large
sunhat adorned with a red ribbon and large corsage. Her
nametag says “Patty .H. Custodial Staff”

WALEN MONOXOLUS is a very small man with long stingy black

hair that thins to reveal a collection of glistening
infected boils on the bald patches. He wears a black and
red ringmasters suit, with knee high black boots and a long
black whip. He is covered in crawling rats.

Walen pushes a rickety red cart around the corner of the

schools red brick wall and creeps shakily over to a group of
children skipping and LAUGHING. The laughing stops and the
children stare.

WALEN MONOXOLUS
Ding–ha-ling ----Ding---ha-
ling----Hello chhiiiiildrennn, the
Icecream-Man has arrived, would
anyone like a sample?

The littlest child walks forward, untied shoelaces dragging.

Hatwoman directs her gaze sharply in their direction,

running her fingers along the brim of her hat.

HATWOMAN
 (Mutters) Walen....

WALEN MONOXOLUS
Yes of course you would...Oh no, it
seems all of my tasty treats have
melted. If you’d all care to come
back to my liar with me I’ll be
sure to fetch an iceream cone for
each of you...

Hatwoman comes sliding out from under the dumpster on her

dolly at warp speed. She wears a floral utility belt with a
large hat shaped belt buckle and dust pan attached. She has
two brooms sticking up crisscrossed from her back.

HATWOMAN
Not so fast!

Hat-woman slides into Walen, tackling him and sending both

of them speeding along on the dolly as they wrestle.

Walen breaks free from the struggle and barrel rolls off the
speeding dolly as he lets out a sinister cackle. Rats are
thrown from his body, skipping along the cement as they
squeal and splatter blood.

Hatwoman barrel rolls after him, landing on top of him. As

they get up and dust themselves off they bonk heads.

HATWOMAN
Walen Monoxolus,you know this is my
headquarters...

WALEN MONOXOLUS
But of course! I was hoping you’d
be on duty...I came to invite you
to my wedding reception...

Hatwoman jerks her head up in shock, furrowing her brows.

HATWOMAN
So..you mean you...

WALEN MONOXOLUS
Getting remarried.

Walen hands her an invitation made with colored construction

paper.

Hatwoman has a stone look, nods 3 times as she swallows.

HATWOMAN
Oh..I see...Congrats. I assume I’ll
be the only one on the guest list.
Wait, you didn’t kidnap...

WALEN MONOXOLUS
 But of course...which is why I
can’t invite you to the
ceremony..with the whole...

HATWOMAN
yeah..

Hatwoman takes off her hat and looks at it, then looks at
Walen.

WALEN MONOXOLUS
It’s why it didn’t work in the
first place, but once we are locked
together inseparably won’t you join
us for muffins? Its important to me
that you meet her...

HATWOMAN
Oh...well...obviously I have no
choice but to try and save her
before the date.

WALEN MONOXOLUS
But if you don’t succeed?

HATWOMAN
I...I guess I..

Hatwoman stiffens her posture

HATWOMAN
Of course I’ll attend...

2.
INT - LONLEY CIRCUS DUNGEON.

NESSILINA is a human dressed in a serpentine green

costume. She is behind the glass of a four walled “tank”.
Her tail has a large meat hook through it that is connected
by a rusty chain to the dingy concrete floor that the tank
encloses.

Blue spot-lights light the tank, and Nessilina drags a cup

along a set of bars held together by two pieces of wood, the
cup is attached to the bars by smaller chain.

She hits a large red button labeled “intercom”, and holds it

down with her flippers.

NESSILINA
Arrghhh - I hate playing with
cup-bar!

Walen leans against a steaming caldron playing with the same

contraption while laughing maniacally.

WALEN MONOXOLUS
 Ohh fiddlesticks, my queen! Its
1000 times better than ball-cup
could ever be!

NESSILINA
Don’t you call me that! Just
because you like cup-bar time, I
will too?! Typical! As if I’m
nothing more than an extension of
you...Or am I?

Walen immediately stops laughing, and gathers himself. He

grabs a pocket watch with a spiral on it off of the ground
and puts it back into his pocket. He looks around with
shifty eyes.

WALEN MONOXOLUS
Of course you are! You...you...well
Like I’ve been telling you
my precious...Without my magic
you wouldn’t even exist!

Nessilina rolls over and reveals a zipper on the back of her

serpent suit

NESSILINA
How many more of us are you going
to create Walen? The tooth fairy is
on life support in the cellar, her
wings all beaten and bruised from
batting her wings with her shackles
on!

Walen picks his top hat off the ground and cracks his whip

WALEN MONOXOLUS
This is for your own good! If you
wanna stay a legend, and live with
the glory as the
LOCK-NESS-MOSTERRRRR!

NESSILINA
GLORY! You call this glory!

Nessilina lifts her flippers off of the intercom and begins

beating them passionately against the ground.

NESSILINA
Blub, blub, blub, blub!!!

WALEN MONOXOLUS
Pardon me...Nessilina. But
you forgot to press your intercom

Nessilina presses the intercom and begins again with even

more passion.
 NESSILINA
GLORY? The glory I dream of having
is as the worlds greatest
synchronized swimmer. But I can’t
even remember what water looks like
outside of this tank!

3.INT. THE HATCAVE. DAY

Hatwoman open the door of a small broom closet, and the

hustle bustle of schoolchildren is heard and seen from
inside the closet as she enters and closes the door behind
her.

She leans her head down and pushes it against a spot on the
wall. As she pushes the brick moves back in a perfect
outline of the Hat. She twists her head to the side and a
RUMBLING is heard.

The quilt embroidered with HATCAVE acting as the far wall

falls to the ground, revealing a much larger broom closet.

Janitorial equipment is everywhere and an endless stream of

golden toilet-bowl cups with toilet brushes sticking out are
mounted on the wall. Each is inscribed with “Mild Mannered
Janitor of the Year”, and embellished in a homey beaderie
under each inscription is the words “BY DAY!”.

Scattered about the table are pictures and clippings of one

girl – a caption reveals her name as Cindy-Loo
Livingston. Hatwoman scans the headlines with great
concentration. They read “Crazed Fan Cheers until Crapping
Stands!”, “Man Claiming to be Witchdoctor banned from
Olympic events”, and finally “Olimpic Swimmer Abducted”.

Hatwoman slams her fists on the desk

HATWOMAN
her...her...so it is her...

Hatwoman looks at a small television screen with a blinking

red hat traveling across a map, she watches as the blinking
hat all of a sudden dissapears

HATWOMAN
always did love the underground...
but where...HEAVENS TO BESTY WALEN.
WHERE IS YOU LAIR? Ohh,
te-he...that would just look
darling on a throw pillow!

Hatwoman grabs her crochet needles and sits down with a

pillow, jittering away and muttering...

HATWOMAN
I’ve gotta find it now...now...now
before its too late...for her.
4.INT. LONLEY CIRCUS DUNGEON.

Nessilina lies sleeping on the cement floor of her tank,

there are dried tears around her red eyes, but she twitches
happily in her dream.

Walen unlocks the door to the tank and walks hunchbacked

over to Nessilina, no water spills out as the tank is only
lit with blue lights.

He closes the door behind him and goes to sit next to

Nessilina, putting her head in his lap.

From his breast pocket he pulls out the spiral pocket-watch,

lifts her eyelids with his claw-like black nails, and begins
to swing it back and forth muttering an inaudible
incantation.

WALEN MONOXOLUS
My love, I promise you’re
better off without remembering
that life of empty
fame.

Walen spoon cuddles Nessilina from behind and the rats

envelop them both.

WALEN MONOXOLUS
The rarest attractions in
the world, and all under my
control. Only 2 more sleeps until
we share this power, my bride.

As walen gets up from the cuddle to exit, a trading card

slipS out of his pocket and is left behind. One of the blue
lights flicker as the rats follow him out.

5. INT- NESSILINA’S TANK

Nessilina lies on the floor of her tank looking forlorn

through the glass. She breathes her hot breath onto the
tank and traces waves in the fog along the glass. She stares
through.

She throws herself onto the ground, burying her face in her
hands to sob. She falls right onto the trading card that
slipped out of Walen pocket, and was left behind.

She lifts her head up and catches a glimpse of the

card. She struggles curiously to pick it up with her
flippers, then manages to hold it close to look. It is a
trading card depicting a female swimmer triumphantly
splashing her arm out of the water holding several gold
medals. Out of the swimmers bathing cap flows the same
fire-red hair that sprouts tangled and knotted out of
 Nessilina’s serpent head-piece.

Nessilina looks at the picture, squinting and confused. She

looks disoriented and shakes her head rapidly for a second.

She looks back out the glass. Stares at her reflection and
then back at the card.

6.
INT. UNDER BRIDGE - EXT - NIGHT

Hatwoman wades through the sewage water under a bridge

approaching a steel door leading into a cement shelter. The
mailbox is overflowing with letters and has the initials "P"
and "W" scratched in a heart.

The door is boarded shut and there is red tape that says
foreclosed on it. Hatwoman takes a key out of her stocking
and tries it in the door.

It does not fit in. She tries again and still

nothing. Hatwoman takes a sharp breath.

HATWOMAN
Changed the locks...

Hatwomangrab some of the mail and flips through it. Stops at a bill
from "UHELL Professional Lair Reallocators" - she opens it
and scans it. It is just a total owed and no new location
is listed. Her face falls in disappointment.

7. INT- NESSILINA’S TANK.

Nessilina cannot sleep, she tosses and turns, she clutches

the card to her chest. She keeps looking at it and
squinting like she is trying to remember something.

Walen creeps towards the tank, opens the door and enters,
dangling his spiral pocket-watch. The keys jingle on their
ring as he approaches.

Nessilina rolls around to face him, and looks shocked and

puzzled.

NESSILINA
The water! It didn’t pour out?
You said without these
walls holding in the water I’d
suffocate

Walen is startled, fumbles to hide his pocket watch but it

slides to the ground. He tries to stuff the keys back into
his pocket, looking stunned and at a loss for words.

The blue light flickers, and Nessilina’s eyes dart over to

it. She looks at the lock on the door. Her expression
changes from confusion to a forced smile and adoring eyes,
she looks at Walen as he blushes.

NESSILINA
Come closer Walen, I want to know
more about you, if I am to become
your Bride...

Walen approaches awkwardly.

NESSILINA
I am lonely, lie with me. Tell
me about your childhood.

Walen giggles and snuggles up next to Nessilina. She

shudders but composes herself long enough to muster a smile
and she brushes his hair off of his face with her flipper
and looks into his beady red eyes.

WALEN MONOXOLUS
This place reminds me of my
childhood in the brothel. Germany’s
red light district. My mother,
Gretchen Spankfurter, yes , YES she
was a prostitute!

Walen gets worked up and cracks his whip. Nessilina pets

him soothingly, inconspicuously patting down his pockets.

NESSILINA
Its ok Walen, I’m glad you’re the
only mother and father I’ve ever
had.

WALEN MONOXOLUS
I would hide under the bed and play
with my circus figurines! I had my
own little circus under that bed..
a circus for one. That’s the kind
for me...

Nessilina reaches into his pocket, then withdraws her

flipper immediately. It is dripping of green slime and she
shakes it off violently, gags, closes her eyes, and delves
back in. She pulls out the metal key ring while exclaiming
over sound the JINGLING...

NESSILINA
OHH, WALEN! But now we can
share!

WALEN MONOXOLUS
And sometimes, Nessilina...The
customers would get violent... ILL
NEVER FORGET one particularly
brutal pistol whipping; seeing that
 clump of golden hair ripped from
her proud cinnamon buns...

Walen holds his hand by his ears, motioning two cinnamon

buns. His eyes well up and he begins petting a rat that
crawls down his arm onto his hand. He looks at the rat,
pets it while continuing to talk.

WALEN MONOXOLUS
(CONT.)
Seeing it lying there, defeated - a
symbol of who we were...all I can
tell you for sure is that was the
moment that I lost my German
accent.

Walen weeps and Nessilina hesitantly wraps her arms around

him clutching the stolen keys. She looks grossed out, but
her expression gradually changes to one of pity and sadnesss
as she shakes her head and rests it on his boiled neck.

Walen gets too excited and craps himself. He gets up

looking flustered and embarrassed. He tries to gather the
mess as it spackles the floor, dropping through his tattered
clothing. He gives up as the volume of shit continues to
increase. He staggers out leaving a trail.

NESSILINA
Goodnight Walen...

Walen turns sheepishly.

WALEN MONOXOLUS
Goodnight my Queen...

He locks the tank on the way out

8. INT. LONELY CIRCUS DUNGEON

Nessilina takes off her serpent costume and is no longer

attached by her fake tail to the hook and chain, she wears a
one-piece bathing suit. She studies her arms and legs in
awe, caressing them rabidly. She starts making swimming
motions, and rhythmically pointing her newly-discovered toes
with glee in her face.

She begins to cry tears of happiness and laugh giddily as

she uses the keys to exit her tank, tiptoeing past a
sleeping Walen curled up by his caldron.

Nessilina runs around excitedly looking for an exit, going

into every crevasse, and trying to climb out from every
angle. Her excitement turns to frantic desperation as she
realizes there is no way out for her. She runs around into
different rooms, looking under rugs, underneath dead rats,
behind piles of bones.
 She spots a light at the top of the cave, and tries to climb
but cannot reach.

In her frenzy she trips over the clown who coughs up blood
and speaks weakly

CLOWN
Theres no hope, kill us
both. please...

NESSILINA
No! Don’t give up, lift me up!

The clown shakes his shackle leg and looks at Nessilina

bleakly, letting his neck go limp and planting his face in
the concrete.

9. INT - NESSILINA’S TANK.

Nessilina has put her suit back waits on the floor of her
tank.

Walen enters with his pocket-watch and lies behind

Nessilina.

WALEN MONOXOLUS
I know your up Nessilina, I’m
excited for the big day tomorrow
too...But I forgot to refresh the
spell, better hurry before you
evaporate!

NESSILINA
Not tonight, my creator. Come and
lie with me. Who will be your best
man, and my bridesmaid’s. What
about CLOWN and CHUPACABRA.

WALEN MONOXOLUS
Chupacabra? I found him dead in his
cell this morning, a shriveled pile
of skin, claws, and hair...Silly
little guy chewed off his own leg
trying to get his shackle off.

Nessilina turns to look in his eyes.

NESSILINA
I’d like Clown to be free to help
me get ready, and you musn’t see me
before...So can you leave us
unlocked together? I want to be
beautiful for you.

Walen blushes and nods, then closes his eyes and goes to
 sleep. Nessilina pretends to go to sleep, but stares with
hopeful eyes wide open.

10. EXT. VILLAGE SQUARE. DAY.

Hatwoman hides behind a wall, looking at a watch with the

same flashing hat-light. She walks sneekily forward, hiding
behind trees, fire hydrants, fat people and looking around.

The hat-light starts flashing faster and the watch begins to

beep.

She spotS Walen skipping along the road towards a flower

store.

11. INT. FLOWER STORE. DAY

Hatwoman peers through a bushel of flowers and Walen enters,

skipping haggardly with a happy grimace on his face. An old
man with spectacles and sweater vest stands behind the
counter making twitchy faces at Walen.

WALEN MONOXOLUS
Posies for a wedding please!
Posies for a wedding! I’d like a
posy or two, please!

An old woman STOREKEEPER lifts her head up from under the

table and puts her dentures back in.

STOREKEEP
How sweet. What is her favourite
color my dear? The special woman
should always get to choose...

Hatwoman narrows her eyes and cringes behind the flowers.

Walen stares blankly.

STOREKEEP
Oh dear...you don’t know. Another
shot gun wedding Harold.

HAROLD
Mmmmmhmmmmm

Harold snaps his suspenders

STOREKEEP
Oh well..i suppose sluts still
deserve to pick their
flowers...blood red i reckon but
but you go ahead and call that
tramp of yours dear...

The old woman passes him a phone and he dials.

12.INT - LONELY CIRCUS DUNGEON.

Nessilina and clown are unchained and she is shaking him on

the ground trying to revive him. She is slapping him and
hugging him and begging. She takes his pulse and then throws
herself down in apathy...she takes in a deep sigh and nods
slowly to herself, a little smile cracks.

The intercom begins buzzing and she loses herself with

excitement, pressing it eagerly.

WALEN MONOXOLUS
(O.S)
Hello, my tramp...would you like
blood red flowers?

Nessilina’s face falls but she answers warmly.

NESSILINA
Yes. that will be very special.

13. INT. FLOWER STORE. DAY

Walen is leaving with red flowers and Hatwoman dashes around

the corner of flowers to the counter. She pulls out a badge
and hold it up, it has a picture of a sunhat on it. The
couple back off.

She takes the phone and hits a button that is labeled

redial.

14. INT. NESSILINA TANK.

Nesslina is putting on her veil and looking at her

reflection in the glass.

The intercom buzzes and she rolls over and presses it.

HATWOMAN
(O.S)
Cindy-Loo! Where are you!

Nessilina is shocked and silent for a moment, but answers

excitedly and begins making swimming motions again.

NESSILINA
In a dungeon, I remember an
island...Sometimes I can hear
seahawks...

HATWOMAN
Not Witchdoctor cove! Why didn’t I
think of that! How do you enter the
dungeon?
 Walen is heard approaching the tank and Nessilina panics and
ends the call.

15. INT. THE LONELY CIRCUS DUNGEON.

Nessilina wears a white veil, and has a posy pinned to her

serpent suit. Walen wears a tuxedo and has a posy pinned to
his breast pocket. The couple holds hands as Walen breaks
free, jumps in front and throws on a priest robe.

WALEN MONOXOLUS
So, Walen, Do you now
bind Yourself to Nessilina in
wed-loch-ness, with this golden
shackle that can never be removed?

Walen throws off the robe and jumps back in position holding
Nessilina’s hand. He clips the shackle around his ankle and
jumps back, putting on the robe again.

WALEN MONOXOLUS
And do you, Nessilina, Do the same?

Nesslina is sweating and looks around. She looks at the

excitement in Walen’s face, looks at the ground, looks back
into Walen’s eyes with the same hint of pity and sorrow for
him. She grabs the shackle, and begins locking it around her
slender neck.

Hatwoman bursts through the wall and rocks crumble, sky

shines through and birds are heard. Nessilina locks her
neck shackle.

HATWOMAN
Crimefighter first! Wedding guest
second!

Hatwoman takes off her hat and throws it like a discus at

Walen triumphantly yelling.

HATWOMAN
Taking out the trash!!!!

A look of panic flashes in Nessilina’s eyes and she dives in

front of the discus. It decapitates her and Walen and
Hatwoman get splattered with blood. They stand there
silently for a moment. Hatwoman sweeps Nessilina’s decapitated
head into her dust pan.

HATWOMAN
Well...She seemed nice...