Interminable Existence

Sample Script
Jeremiah Pasternak
12/06

Jeremiah Pasternak
500 Main St.
Rockland, ME 04841
(207) 596 0111

jeremiahpasternak@hotmail.com
 1

FADE IN:

INT. SAM’s APARTMENT - DAY 1

SAM, an up and coming artist in his early thirties is sitting

on a vintage black leather sofa in the middle of his
spacious, open-concept, loft apartment. He has a pad of
drawing paper in his lap, a pen in one hand and the phone in
the other. Sam is doodling as he talks on the phone with a
woman from a cancer benefit. She is calling in regards to
SAM’s participation in the benefit. He has 24 hours to
create a piece of art that will be auctioned off.

SAM
(into phone)
Oh yeah, I’m REALLY excited about it...
Sure...Yeah, I know it’s a great
opportunity...It is quite an honor...
Of course.

MADDY, Sam’s leggy, twenty something fashion model neighbor

enters through the front door of the apartment, behind where
Sam is sitting.

MADDY
Hey!

Sam look back, smiles and mouths, ‘one minute’.

SAM
(into phone)
Oh sure...Yeah, I’m ready to get
started as soon as I get off the phone.

Maddy goes into Sam’s kitchen, to the right of where he is

sitting and begins to look through the cabinets for something
to eat.

SAM
(into phone)
Yeah, I’ve had this idea for some
time...Of course it’s a good one...
(laughs)
Yes...OK, then, until tomorrow...Yeah,
I look forward to seeing the final
product too...Bye now.
CONTINUED: 2

Sam hangs up and throws his head back as if to say, ‘oh my

god!’. Maddy is rummaging through the kitchen cabinets, but
takes a second to lean over the islang bridging the living
room and the kitchen.

MADDY
What’s up?

SAM
I’m going CRAZY!
(shakes his head
like a wild man)
That was the girl from the cancer
auction on the phone, and I told her I
was just about to get started on
something ‘blow your mind’ amazing...
and...

MADDY
(her head buried in
the refrigerator)
And?

SAM
And, I don’t have ANYTHING to get
started on...nevermind something
auction worthy amazing.
(pause, expecting
a response)
I have...absolutely...no idea what
I’m going to do...and, I only have
twenty-four hours!

Maddy quits rummaging.

MADDY
Why don’t you just paint something?

Sam looks at Maddy, not really sure if she’s being serious.

SAM
Just paint something? Um...
(laughs)
I’m not a painter-

MADDY
You’re an artist! Isn’t that what
you do? Paint?
CONTINUED: 3

SAM
(still unsure if
she’s being serious)
No, not me.

Maddy comes out from behind the kitchen island and sits in a
club chair to the right of the sofa where Sam is sitting,
with a box of ‘Cap’n Crunch’ in her hand.

MADDY
Then, what do you do?

SAM
(now fairly certain
she’s being serious)
It’s very complicated. My work
consists of-

Maddy picks up the box of ‘Cap’n Crunch’ and dumps it into

her open mouth.

SAM
Well...it consists of many different
mediums. I incorporate photography...
sculptural aspects...and lots of other
stuff, you know, depending on what it
is that i’m doing.

Maddy has finished chewing her mouthful of ‘Cap’n Crunch’.

MADDY
You don’t need to go into detail,
(pours another mouthful)
I don’t really care.

Maddy gets up and goes back to the island.

SAM
Then, why would you ask?

MADDY
I don’t know. I guess it felt like
you wanted me to ask, so...

Maddy takes a cake out of the refrigerator. Sam is looking

at his pad with his pen to the paper, but isn’t writing
anything.
CONTINUED: 4

SAM
So, you really don’t care what I do?

MADDY
Should I?

Maddy gets a knife out and begins to cu a piece of the cake.

SAM
(looking away
from Maddy)
Well, I guess you don’t have to...
I mean.

Maddy licks the knife covered with frosting.

MADDY
You’ve never asked me about what I do.

SAM
But, I know what you do.

MADDY
Maybe you don’t.

Sam turned to look at Maddy, confused at what she’s getting

at. She puts the first bite of cake into her mouth.

MADDY
(mouth full)
It’s OK if I have some of this, right?

SAM
(shocked)
What are you doing?!

MADDY
(pause as she chews
what’s in her mouth)
Having some cake?

Sam throws his head back again.

MADDY
(oblivious)
What? Do you want a slice?
CONTINUED: 5

SAM
(sighs)
No...I bought that cake especially
for the cancer thing!

MADDY
It’s REALLY good.

SAM
Yeah, that’s kinda why I bought it.

MADDY
Well, you can still bring it...I
mean there’s still at least seven
slices.

SAM
(laughs)
Why are you even here?

MADDY
This time of day, most people are
at work, so-

SAM
So, it’s not because I’m SUCH a great
guy or a great friend...it’s because
I’m the only one home?

MADDY
SAM...of course. And, I knew you’d
have...
(holds up fork
and smiles)

SAM
(rolls his eyes)
Cut me a slice.

Maddy puts her plate down and begins to cut another slice.
The phone rings.

SAM
I’ll get it.

MADDY
(holds up knife)
OK!
CONTINUED: 6

SAM picks up the phone.

SAM
(into phone)
Hello.

EXT. STREET - DAY (CONT’D)

A well-dressed brother and sister, JACK and JANE, are walking

down a busy city street. Jack is in his mid twenties and
Jane is a few years older, but appears to be far well
advanced in her level of maturity. Jack is on the phone.

JACK
(into phone)
Hey, Sammy!

JANE
(yells)
Hi Sam!

INTERCUT:

SAM
(into phone)
Where are you?
(pause)
I thought you were coming by to pick
up your tux.

INTERCUT:

JACK
(yelling into phone)
Can you just bring it to dinner?

INTERCUT:

SAM
(holding phone away
from his ear)
Yeah, fine.
(pause)
You’re breaking up, I can hardly
hear you.

INTERCUT:
CONTINUED: 7

JACK
(yelling into phone)
I’m going to the grocery store,
do you need anything?

INTERCUT:

SAM
(into phone)
I can hear you! Um...
(pause)
As a matter of fact...

INTERCUT:

JANE
(to Jack)
What does he want?

JACK
(into phone)
What do you want?

INTERCUT:

SAM
I need to bring some kind of dessert
to the cancer benefit.

INTERCUT:

JACK
(into phone)
Like what...what do you want?

JANE
What does he want?

INTERCUT:

SAM
(into phone)
Well, I already bought a cake, but
it’s been compromized, so, just pick
out anything that looks decent.

INTERCUT:
CONTINUED: 8

JACK
(into phone)
Does it matter how it tastes, cause
I think it matters.

JANE
What does he want you to taste?

INTERCUT:

SAM
(into phone)
How are you going to taste something
before you buy it?

INTERCUT:

JACK
(into phone)
I don’t know...Oh wait, I’ll just buy
something that I’ve had before...
something I know is good.
(pause)
Maybe cheesecake.

INTERCUT:

SAM
(into phone)
That sounds fine.

INTERCUT:

JANE
No; devil’s food!

JACK
(into phone)
Jane wanted devil’s food.

INTERCUT:

SAM
(into phone)
I don’t care...whatever...just-

INTERCUT:
CONTINUED: 9

JACK
(into phone, sighs)
Oh, I haven’t had devil’s food cake
in forever!

Jane mouths, ‘me neither’.

INTERCUT:

SAM
(into phone)
You’re not going to forget, right?
This is important.

MADDY
He’ll forget.

INTERCUT:

JACK
(into phone)
Have I ever let you down? No, wait...
don’t answer that.

JANE
(excited)
Tell him that I’m going to get a new
dress for the cancer thing right now.

JACK
(into phone)
Jane wants me to tell you that she’s
going to buy a new dress for the
benefit.

INTERCUT:

SAM
(to Maddy)
Jane’s going to buy a new dress.

MADDY
Where?

SAM
(into phone)
Where?

INTERCUT:
CONTINUED: 10

JACK
(to Jane)
Where?

JANE
The Rack.

JACK
(into phone)
The Rack.

INTERCUT:

SAM
(to Maddy)
She’s going to the Rack.

MADDY
No, not the Rack! Tell her I’ll meet
her at Barney’s in half an hour.

SAM
(into phone)
Tell her-
(to Maddy)
You tell her!

SAM throws the phone to Maddy.

MADDY
(into phone)
Jane?

INTERCUT:

JACK
(into phone)
Jack.

INTERCUT:

MADDY
(into phone)
Jack, tell Jane to meet me at Barney’s
in half an hour, K?

Maddy hangs up.

CONTINUED: 11

MADDY
I gotta go.

MADDY jumps up, tosses the phone back to Sam and runs out the
front door, leaving the box of cereal, her dish and the cake
out. Sam is speechless.

INTERCUT:

JACK
You have to meet Maddy at Barney’s
in half an hour.

JANE
You’re kidding, right!?

JACK shrugs his shoulders so that his sister knows that he’s
not kidding. Jane punches him in the arm.

INT. ELEVATOR - DAY 1

Maddy is waiting in the elevator. It stops on the third

floor and DORIS, an older women from the building, gets in.

MADDY
(cheery)
Good afternoon Doris.

DORIS
Well, you have a special glow today
Maddy, don’t you. What’s the occasion?

MADDY
I’m going shopping!

DORIS
Isn’t that exciting.

The elevator stops at Maddy’s floor.

MADDY
Yes, it is!

MADDY steps out of the elevator and turns back to face it.

MADDY
Now, you have a wonderful day too, K?
CONTINUED: 12

DORIS
I’ll certainly try.

The elevator door closes.

INT. CONVENIENT STORE - DAY 1

Jack is standing at the register with a roll of lottery

tickets. He looks frustrated, obviously not winning. The
CASHIER, an asian man with a large grin on his face is
watching him scratch away as there are few other people in
the store. Jack scratches the last ticket of a roll of six
or seven.

CASHIER
Five more, Mr. Jack?

JACK
Oh...I really shouldn’t.

Jack takes out his wallet and sees that it’s almost empty.
He takes out a grocery list from his back pocket and tries to
add up in his head what it’s going to cost before making a
decision.

JACK
Yeah, what the heck. Give me...
five ‘Lucky Aces’.

INT. SAM’s APARTMENT - DAY 1

SAM is on the phone with his mother, still sitting on the

couch with his pad and pen.

SAM
(into phone)
Yes Ma, I’m very excited...
(holds the phone
away from his ear)
uh huh...yeah...yup...
(puts the phone
back to his ear)
Yeah, it is a big deal...I know...Of
course I tried it on...Why wouldn’t
it fit...Ma, I’m pretty sure I
haven’t grown since the last time I
wore it...
CONTINUED: 13

SAM (CONT’D)
(into phone)
Yes, I’ve worn it since prom...ok...
I love you too...I’ve got to go, I
have another call...Yup, bye.

Sam pushes the ‘talk’ button on the phone.

SAM
(into phone)
Hello?

INT. BARNEY’S - DRESSING ROOM - DAY (CONT’D)

Jane is in the dressing room with at least four or five dress

hung up for her to try on.

JANE
(into phone)
I’m going to kill you!

INTERCUT:

SAM
(into phone, joking)
Who is this?

INTERCUT:

JANE
(into phone)
Sam!

INTERCUT:

SAM
(into phone, joking)
Is this that girl from high school?...
The one that refused to shave her
armpits? Cause, you know, it wasn’t me
that made fun of you...actually...I may
have even had a little crush-

INTERCUT:
CONTINUED: 14

JANE
(into phone,
interrupts)
-Who are you?

INTERCUT:

SAM
(into phone)
I’m Sam, who are you?

INTERCUT:

JANE
(into phone,
whisper yelling)
Someone that’s seriously mad at
you...I can’t believe you told her
I was going shopping! That was for
your ears only! You know how she is.

INTERCUT:

SAM
(into phone)
Crazy? Annoying? Obtrusive?
Imposing?

INTERCUT:

JANE
(into phone)
Yes, yes, yes and yes!

INTERCUT:

SAM
(into phone)
Still, at least you get to spend the
rest of the day shopping. I, on the
other hand have twenty-four hrs to
create something amazing that people
are actually going to want to bid on-

INTERCUT:
CONTINUED: 15

JANE
(into phone,
interrupts)
Sam, it’s a charity auction! People
don’t actually want the stuff they bid
on; they’re bidding because they want
to give their money away.

INTERCUT:

SAM
(into phone)
But, is it so wrong for me to want
someone who bids on my ‘art’ to
actually want it?

INTERCUT:

JANE
(into phone)
I’m just saying that whatever you do
will raise money...there’s no pressure.

INTERCUT:

SAM
(into phone)
So, you’d rather be doing this than
trying on couture gowns at ‘Barney’s’?

INTERCUT:

JANE
(into phone)
Sam, do you have any idea what it’s
like for an ‘ordinary girl’ to go
shopping with a model?

MADDY (O.S)
How’s that little black one working
out for you?

Jane pokes her head out from behind the curtain. Maddy is
standing there with a big smile on her face and three more
dresses in her hand.

JANE
(to Maddy, whispers)
One second.
CONTINUED: 16

Jane goes back into the dressing room.

JANE
(into phone)
OK, I have to go.

INTERCUT:

SAM
(into phone)
Has she tried on any lingerie yet?

INTERCUT:

JANE
(into phone)
Ya know, men like you are really
great for a woman’s self-esteem!

INTERCUT:

SAM
(into phone)
Good luck.

INTERCUT:

Jane hangs up and opens the curtain.

MADDY
So?

JANE
(shrugging her
shoulders)
Maddy, the black one would be great...
if I actually had the boobs to fill
it out, but-

MADDY
How about the red one?

JANE
I LOVE the red one...but, it’s $1200,
and that’s about $1000 more than I
was planning on spending.
CONTINUED: 17

MADDY
Don’t worry about that, let’s get the
red one.

JANE
But-

INT. CONVENIENT STORE - DAY 1

Jack is still scratching lottery tickets.

JACK
(to Cashier)
This is the one...I can feel it.

Jack scratches the ticket.

CASHIER
For your sake Mr. Jack, I hope so.

Jack throws the ticket on the counter, obviously frustrated.

JACK
Come on!

The Cashier shrugs his soldiers. Jack takes out his wallet
and counts his money once again. He then takes out his
grocery list from his back pocket and puts it away before
even looking at it.

JACK
(to Cashier)
One more five dollar one.

CASHIER
Just one?

Jack hands the Cashier five dollars.

JACK
Just one and then cut me off.

The Cashier gives Jack the ticket. Jack kisses it and looks
up, as if to ask God to please give him a winner. He looks
down and scratches away feverishly. It’s not a winner. He
throws it on the counter on top of the rest the pile of
losers..
CONTINUED: 18

JACK
One more.

CASHIER
Yes, sir.

EXT. STREET CAFE - DAY 1

Jane and Maddy are sitting at an outdoor cafe on a busy city

street. Both have Barney’s bags on the chairs next to them.

JANE
You’re sure...I mean ONE HUNDRED
PERCENT CERTAIN that I can bring
it back without any problems?

MADDY
Jane, listen to me. Every model I
know, myself included, does ALL of
their shopping at Barney’s. It’s
the ONE and ONLY ‘swanky’ store
where you can buy stuff, wear it
once and bring it back without any
questions.

JANE
So, you’ve done this before...and
no problems?

MADDY
More times than I can count and
there’s NEVER been a problem.

JANE
May I ask why you do it?

MADDY
Anyone that’s anyone doesn’t wear the
same thing twice...and for people,
like myself who can’t afford to have
closets full of worn, never to be worn
again clothes, this is the perfect
solution! I can look absolutely amazing
and it doesn’t really cost me anything.

JANE
I don’t know...it just doesn’t feel
right.
CONTINUED: 19

MADDY
Maybe not now, but tomorrow night when
you put it on, and all eyes are on you
and that AMAZING $1200 dress you’ll be
thanking me...big time!

JANE
I know, it does look sooo good...But,
this is the first and last time.

MADDY
If you say so.

JANE
And, please don’t tell my brother,
or SAM.

Maddy ‘zips’ her lips shut.

INT. SAM’s APARTMENT - DAY 1

Sam hasn’t moved from his couch. His pen is pressed firmly
against the pad on his lap, but it’s not moving.

SAM
(talking to himself)
How can she compare shopping...to this!

INT. GROCERY STORE - DAY 1

Jack is pushing around a shopping cart, list in hand. Up and

down the aisles, he finally ends up at the freshly made
dessert section. He looks over their selection and then
looks around suspiciously to see if anyone is watching him.
Satisfied that no one is watching, he picks up a cake and
slides it in the underside of the carriage. Jack then
proceeds to the checkout where a female CASHIER scans through
all of his items.

CASHIER
That’ll be $29.67.

Jack takes out his wallet and is relieved to see a $20 and a
$10.

JACK
Just enough.
CONTINUED: 20

Jack hands the $30 to the Cashier.

CASHIER
Thirty-three cents is your change.
Have a nice day.

JACK
Thanks, you too.

JACK smiles at the Cashier and pushed his cart toward the
door. Just as he is about to go through the automatic doors
Jack spots a SECURITY GUARD. The Security Guard lets Jack
walk out of the store and then rushes after him.

SECURITY
Excuse me, sir.

JACK
(turns around)
Me?

SECURITY
Yes, you.

JACK
What...seems to be the problem?

SECURITY
Did you pay for that cake?

JACK
What cake?

SECURITY
The one that’s conveniently placed
under your carriage.

Jack looks down and pretends to be surprised.

JACK
Oh, someone must have..put that...
there...

SECURITY
Sir, I’m going to have to ask you to
come with me.
 21

INT. DINER - NIGHT 1

Sam, Maddy and Jane are sitting in a booth at the diner they
frequently visit. Sam is squished in one side with Jack’s
tuxedo and on the other Jane is reading the menu and Maddy is
trying to flag down a waiter.

SAM
(surprised)
So...you two had a fun day?

MADDY
Sam, it was a great day! Jane’s
dress is absolutely gorgeous and
she looks stunning in it-

JANE
(puts down her menu)
-Oh, stop it!

MADDY
And, after Barney’s she took me by
her gallery and it was SO amazing...
Now, when I’m done with modelling I
think I might want to...
(gives Jane a
friendly tap)
maybe get into the art business.

SAM
(eyeing Jane)
That’s really terrific...And, to think,
all afternoon I was afraid that after a
day together, you might be ready to pull
out each other’s hair...
(sarcastic)
I don’t know why I ever would have
thought that.

MADDY
Me neither. I knew we were going to
have a blast from the second I left
your house.

A WAITRESS comes and pours coffee.

CONTINUED: 22

JANE
(sincere)
It was a lot of fun...And, I never would
have got my dress if Maddy wasn’t there,
so...

Sam’s phone rings. He struggles to find it and when he does

checks the caller ID.

SAM
It’s Jack.
(into phone)
Hello.

JANE
Tell him I’m not waiting to order.

SAM
(into phone, surprised)
You’re where?

INT. SECURITY OFFICE - NIGHT 1

Sam, Maddy and Jane are in a tiny office with the Security
Guard. There is a tv sitting on a metal table. Playing is
the surveillance footage of Jack eyeing the cake, looking
around and then putting it under the carriage.

SAM
At least he didn’t forget.

JANE
This isn’t funny!

SECURITY
No, ma’am, it’s not.

JANE
(to Guard)
He’s just...so smart...and at the
same time so amazingly dumb.

SAM
This is my fault...I mean...

Another SECURITY GUARD brings Jack into the already crowded

room. Both Guards leave. Jack has a stupid grin on his
face.
CONTINUED: 23

JACK
Well, that wasn’t particularly
pleasant.

JANE
What were you thinking?

JACK
Relax.

JANE
Relax?!

SAM
(to the Guard in
the next room)
Is he all set to go?

GUARD
You can take him, but we have his
photo on file and I don’t want to
see him back in this store or next
time you’ll be posting bail.

JANE
(to Guard)
Sir, there won’t be a next time.
(looks at Jack)
Right?

JACK
Right sis, never again...never,
never, never.

JANE
(to Guard)
Thank you and we’re very sorry for
the trouble.
(to Jack)
Come on.

SAM
(to Jack)
Here, take this.

Sam hands Jack his tuxedo. Jane and Jack leave the office.
Maddy follows. Sam waits behind.
CONTINUED: 24

SAM enters the room where the two Guards are sitting.

SAM
Did he say why he paid for
everything BUT the cake?

GUARD
Yeah, he gave me some crazy excuse
about buying too many scratch tickets.

SAM
Thanks again.

Sam exits.

EXT. STREET - OUTSIDE SUPERMARKET - NIGHT (CONT’D)

Jack, Jane and Maddy are waiting as Sas comes out.

JANE
Do you still want to go eat?

JACK
I’m starving.

MADDY
Me too...all that shopping REALLY
built up my appetite.

JANE
Sam?

SAM
No, that’s OK. I have to go in
and...
(laughs)
get a cake.

JACK
They probably still have mine in the
security office...they said something
about ‘evidence’.

SAM
Yeah, I’ll go in and ask, and then
I’ve got to get home and start
working on my ‘art’.
CONTINUED: 25

JANE
So, you know what you’re going to do?

SAM
I think I’ve finally got my
necessary inspiration.

Sam turns to go back into the grocery store.

MADDY
(to Sam)
I’ll bring you home something from
the diner.

SAM turns back around.

SAM
That sounds good.

INT. SAM’s APARTMENT - NIGHT 2

SAM is walking around his kitchen, on the phone with his

mother. He’s wearing a tuxedo.

SAM
(into phone)
Yeah, ma...I wish you could be here
too...

Jack and Jane enter. They’re all dressed up and arguing.

SAM
(blocks phone)
I’m on the phone!
(into phone)
No, nothing, ma...just Jack and
Jane...yes, i’ll tell them you say
hello...we’re going to be late...I
love you too.

Sam hangs up the phone and gets close to Jane and looks her
up and down.

SAM
Wow, that is some dress!

JANE
Ya think?
CONTINUED: 26

SAM
Are you kidding, you look...like
a movie star.

JACK
Did she tell you how much she paid
for it? Twelve hundred big ones!

JANE
(annoyed)
Jack, I told you not to..!

SAM
$1200?! For a dress?

JACK
And get this; she’s going to wear
it and then she’s going to bring
it back to Barney’s.

SAM
Bring it back? This had to be
Maddy’s idea.

Maddy enters.

SAM
Speak of the devil-

JACK
Mmmm...did you get devil’s food?-

MADDY
-Did I hear my name?

Maddy goes to fridge and gets a drink and a glass.

MADDY
(holding up a glass)
Anyone?

JANE
(to Sam)
She said she does it all the time...
everyone does it.

SAM
And that means it’s right?
CONTINUED: 27

JACK
Yeah, no...you’re crossing the line,
sis.

JANE
Jack, you stole a cake!

SAM
Correction; tried to steal cake.

JACK
But, that was not for me...it was for
Sam.

SAM
And that makes it OK?

JANE
(near tears)
But, look at it...I look like a
movie star.

SAM
Come to think of it, you kinda look
like Winona Ryder.

Jane gives Jack and Sam a guilty look.

JANE
I know it was wrong, but look how
beautiful it is, and it’s just a one
time thing, so...

MADDY
(interrupts)
We need to leave like...five minutes
ago, or we’re going to be late.

INT. CANCER BENEFIT FUNCTION HALL - TABLE - NIGHT 2

Sam, Maddy, Jack and Jane are sitting one one side of a table
for eight. They are right besides the dance floor and three
tables back from the main stage and podium. People are just
starting to dance as a live band plays. Two attractive GUYS
come up behind Jane and Maddy and tap them on the shoulders.
CONTINUED: 28

GUY 1
Would you ladies like to dance?

MADDY
Nah, I don’t really dance.

GUY 2
(to Jane)
How about you?

JANE
You know what, yeah, I’d love to!

Jane gets up and is lead to the dance floor that takes up

much of the small room.

INT. FUNCTION HALL - LATER

Jane is dancing away with a drink in hand, as is Jack. Sam

and Maddy are in the dessert line.

MADDY
So, what did you come up with?

SAM
Why are you all of a sudden so
interested in my work?

MADDY
I meant what kind of cake did you
get...

SAM rolls his eyes at her.

MADDY
Kidding! No, I want to know what
you ‘created’...I mean...one day I
might want to sell your work, so...

SAM
Ha! You and Jane could share an office.

MADDY
Don’t laugh, it might happen. So, tell
me what you did!
CONTINUED: 29

SAM
You’ll see it soon enough at the same
time as everyone else.

Maddy playfully grabs Sam’s arm and shakes him.

MADDY
Come on, give me a hint!

SAM
The best inspiration always comes from
events that happen in an artist’s
life...friends, family...all that.

MADDY
Oh god, you didn’t do something about
Jane’s dress, did you?

INT. FUNCTION HALL - LATER

The dance floor is almost empty, although Jack and Jane are
still out there. Sam and Maddy are back at the table, just
about done with dessert.

MADDY
That was really good.

The AUCTIONEER on stage taps the microphone and everyone

turns to look.

AUCTIONEER
(on stage)
Hi everyone, could you all please make
your way back to your seats. The
‘Art in 24’ charity auction will be
starting shortly and I want to make
sure you all have your checkbooks out
and are ready to give, give, give to a
great cause!

Jack and Jane return from the dance floor, both are dripping
sweat.

JANE
Oh, this is so much fun!
CONTINUED: 30

JACK
I met this great girl with cancer...
and she’s hot!

SAM
I’m sure that won’t be the last of you
she sees tonight.

JACK
(sits down)
How’s the cake?

MADDY
Absolutely delicious!

Jane is fanning herself to try and cool down. She picks up a

glass of water from the place setting in front of Sam and
guzzles it down.

INT. FUNCTION HALL - STAGE - LATER

Various shots of auction pieces as the come up for sale and

the people in the audience raising their paddles to bid.

AUCTIONEER
Up next we have a work by an
up-and-coming local artist Sam
Braden. This is, ‘The Favor’.

The cover is pulled off of the work to reveal a pair of six

foot square photographs. Both are of Jack’s security
mugshot, one with the caption ‘Friends don’t let friends buy
scratch tickets’ and the other ‘Friends don’t let friends
steal cake’.

INT. FUNCTION HALL - TABLE (CONT’D)

Jane and Maddy look at Sam and begin laughing hysterically.

SAM
So, what do you think?

PAUSE

JACK
That’s awesome!
 31

END CREDITS

INT. BARNEY’S - DAY 3

Jane and Maddy are at the customer service counter.

JANE
What do you mean you can’t take it
back? I don’t like it, I don’t
want it.

CASHIER
Well, maybe you should have thought
about that before you wore it.

CASHIER hold up the dress so that Jane can see it more

clearly.

CASHIER
There are sweat stains under the
armpits and the dress. And, I can
smell you on it.

JANE
That isn’t fair!

CASHIER
Life isn’t fair.

Jane sighs in disbelief.

CASHIER
Just remember, the next time you buy
something, if you think you might be
bringing it back, DON’T WEAR IT!

JANE
(disgusted)
Fine.

Jane takes the dress from the Cashier and walks away. Maddy
follows.

JANE
What...what happened?...I thought?
CONTINUED: 32

MADDY
I said you could wear it and bring
it back...not dance in it and sweat
in it...I mean, come on, Barney’s
can’t sell smelly clothes.

Jane keeps walking. Maddy follows.

MADDY
Just think, now you have a great
dress that you can wear to all
your formal events.

JANE
Yeah, or I can sell it on ebay and
try to get some of my $1200 back!

MADDY
Or that.

END