APoi

sonedSoul

I
ntr
oduct
ion
Mynamei sSiziphiweIst aywi t
hmyabusi ve
biol
ogi cal motherandherboy fri
endi nav il
lage
i
nt heEast ernCape.Theyt r
eatlikeI'
m no
humanbei ngmymom makesmewearol d
dresseswhi char et ornandhav eholesi nthem.
Iwalkbar efootwi thnoshoesev enifit'
shot
outside.Ev erydayIwakeupandcl eant he
housewhet herit'scleanornotwhi l
emysi sters
andbr otheraredoi ngnothingjustsitti
ng
aroundandgoi ngt oschool.Mymot her's
boyfriendi sjustt hemanwhoknowshowt okil
l
ainnocentsoul inside.Hehadt ouchedme
mor et han3t i
mesi nunappr opriat
epl aces
l
eav i
ngmewi t
het ernalscarsthatcoul dnev er
beheal edev enbyt herapy.Ihaverepor tedthe
i
ncident swiththi smanbutmymot herwoul d
say"Si ziphiwey oukeepseduci ngmymanand
sayheistheonewhocamet oyousiesyou
mustbeashamedofy oursel
f"whenshet ol
d
met hosewordsmyheartwouldjustshatt
er
i
ntopiecesbecauseshebeli
evesanotherman
i
nsteadofmeandt hatmanwoul dbehappyt o
hearthati
twouldbewrit
tenallov
erhisdark,
evi
lface.
Whi l
et heysleepi nthemai nhouseIwoul dbe
sleepinginadi rtyrondav elonabl anketthatI
keepmy selfwar m with,eversi
ncemyf ather
diedIhav enev erhadpeacei nthathouse.Iwas
aslav einmyf at her'
shouse, everydayIwoul d
bewokenupwi thaglassofwat ersplashedin
myf acebymyy oungersisterwhowas4y ears
youngert hanmeandshewoul dgi ggleafter
that.Iwast hej okeoft hehousenot hi
ngIsaid
wast akenser iously.
Mysi
bli
ngsar
e:
Anovuy
o:Shei
sthefir
stbor
nandis25year
sol
d
shewasaspoil
tbratwhocoul
dn'
tevenhol
da
br
oom andshewasn'
tst
udy
ing,
shehad3ki
ds
Bandile:
Heisthesecondbornandis21years
oldhei sadown-t
o-eart
hguyandalwaysli
kes
tobear oundme.Hei sdoi
nghisl
astyeari
n
BusinessStudi
es.Hehasnokids.
Simamkele:14yearsoldandsheisthel
astbor
n
sheisalsoaspoiltbrat
.Sadl
yshehasababy
whois2y earsoldanmot herseesnoshamein
herdaughter'
spregnancy.
Thepar
entsareNonzameLolo(mot
her)and
DumaniKi
naka(boyf
ri
end)i
fIdescr
ibethem
youwoul
dwantt oki
llme.
Sizi
phiwe'
sdescri
pti
on:Tal
l,sl
ender
,di
mples 
on
bothcheeksIhavelonghairbutyouwould
neverseebecausetheyarealwaysdir
tyandI'
m
17y ear
sold.
Ineverheard"
Ilov
ey ou"from mymotherever
sinceIwasbornexceptfrom Bandi
l
esot hatI
couldcheerupandfeellovefr
om someonei n
thefamil
y.AndIdisl
i
ket osaythatmy
biol
ogicalpar
ent,aper sonwhocar r
iedmef or9
monthsbutshest il
ldoest hatt oherownf lesh
andblood.Ineverthoughtofbei ngsui
cidal
beacauseofbeingmi str
eat edbyaper sonwho
youwoul dli
ketotellyourpr oblemsandt heir
wouldgivebackadv iceev eni fIdidkil
lmy selfI
wouldbebur i
edinbl ackplast icbagsnotev en
i
nacasket .Ihadalreadydi gest edthatthi
swas
theli
fechosenforme.
[
06/
04,
20:
26]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t1
AsIwassl eepi
ngpeacefull
yonthatblanket
,I
fel
tthiscoldrunnysubstanceonmyf ace.I
quicklyjumpedandopenedmyey esitwas
Anov uyo.SheletoutalaughasIsaidIwas
seenasaj okeinthi
shouse
Anovuyo:
Mom i
ssay
inggoandmakebr
eakf
ast
forus
Me:
I'
m wi
l
lbet
her
e
Anov
uyo:
Now!
Me:
Isai
dI'
m comi
ng
Sherolledhereyesatmeandt henlef
t,Ifol
ded
theblanketandwentt ot
hemai nhouse.Iwas
welcomedbyahugf rom Bandi
lehewast he
onlypersonthatlov
edmei nthathouse,hewas
thepersonthatwasdown- t
o-ear
th.Hehad
camebackf r
om CapeTown
Bandi
l
e:Heyy
ou
Me:Hel
l
owowy
oul
ooksot
all
,CapeTownl
oves
you
Bandi
l
e:Iknow
Wechattedforawhil
ethenmymot her
Nonzamelookedatuswithadisgust
edface,
sheneverl
ikedthei
deaofBandil
etal
kingtome
Mom:
Isbr
eakf
astmaki
ngi
tsel
f?
Il
ookeddownandf
iddl
edwi
thmyf
inger
s
Me:
Nomai
twont
Mom:
Thenwhyar
eyoust
il
lher
e?
Me:
Sor
rymaIgoi
ngt
ogoandmakei
t
Bandi
l
e:Letmehel
pyousi
s
Mom:
Bandi
l
eyouwontdot
hatgoandsi
tdown
Bandi
le:
Iwi
ll
helphery
ouwl
ntgi
veme
i
nstr
ucti
onstodo
Me:
It
'sokaybr
oIwi
l
lmanage
Iwenttot hekit
chenandImadet hebr eakfast,I
dishedupt henBandi l
ecameandt oom the
dishestothediningtabl e.Idi
shedupf ormy sel
f
andwentt oeatbyt her ondavelwhi chIsleepin.
Aftert
hatIwashedt hedi shesfol
lowedbyt he
choresinthehouse, around12: 30Iwentt o
drawwat erfrom theriver. 
It
ookabuckett henwalkedtot
heriversinging
asongthatmyf atherusedt
osingtomewhenI
wasli
tt
le.Ineverhadfri
endssi
nceGr ade10so
Iwoul
dwat eralonetodrawwater
,soIar ri
ved
att heri
verIsatdownt hinki
ngthewayIwas
treatedbyNonzameal l t
heseyears.After20
mi nutesIstoodupthendr awedthewat erfr
om
ther i
verIputthebucketonmyhead, Istar
ted
wal ki
ngIfeltshi
ver
sbei ngsentdownmyspi ne
asi fsomeonewaswat chingme.Ilookedback
i
twast hemosthandsomemanIhav enev er
seen 
Me:Uxol
obhuti
enenxaki
?(Sor
rybr
adoy
ou
hav
eapr obl
em?)
Guy:Hayisi
siqhandi
mangazwengobubuhl
e
ndi
bubonaapha( Nogir
l,I
'
mjustamazedbythe
beautyIseehere)
Idecidedt
ostept
omyEngl i
shsi
deandI
smiledwhenhesai
dthatbuttot
hesi
de 
Me:
Whatbeaut
y?Agi
rli
nrags?
Guy
:Therei
ssomethingel
sebeaut
if
ulunder
t
hoseragsandI
'm Lungel
oandyouare?
Hehadpul
l
edouthi
shandf
orahandshake
andIshooki
t
Me:
I'
m Si
zi
phiweIneedt
ogetgoi
ngbef
oremy
mom comesandpull
smehome
Lungel
ol aughedmay bewhatIsaidwasajoke
tohisearsandNonzamewascapabl eofdoi
ng
that
,hehel pedmepl acet
hepailonmyhead
andlefthim standi
ngther
e.Hequickl
ycame
andstoodi nfrontofme
Lungel
o:What
'sy
oursur
name?Wher
edoy
ou
stay
?
Me:Lonokoandwher
eIst
aydoesn'
tconcer
n
you
Lungel
o:Yoursur
namesoundsf
ami
l
iar
Me:
Lungel
oby
e
Lungel
o:Iwi
l
lfi
ndoutwher
eyoust
ayIpr
omi
se
Il
etoutachuckl
ethenwalkedhomewitha
smil
ewrit
tenonmyf ace,
Iwenttoputt
hepai
l
i
nthekit
chenandSimamkelewaslooki
ngat
me 
Me:
Ist
her
eapr
obl
em?
Si
mamkele:
Bet
terbecar
eful
aboutLungel
ohe
wi
llhur
tyou
Me:
What
ever
Simamkeleneverl
i
kedseeingmehappyf or
somehowbutthatdidn'
tstopme.Ourhouse
wasprett
ymuchabi tcl
osetot heri
verandyou
coukdseethi
ngshappeningthere.
Iwenttotherondav
el andlaidont heblanket
,
Bandecameandwewer echatti
ngupast orm.
WellBandil
ewasmybi ol
ogicalbrotherwe
shar
edt hesamemot herandf ather
Bandi
l
e:Si
zidon'
tyouwanttorunandli
ve
somewherebett
erthant
hisrubbi
sh?
Me:
IfIr
unaway
,wher
ewi
l
lIst
aywi
thwho?
Bandi
le:
Youwil
lstayi
nCapeTownwhenI
'
m
set
tl
edandeveryt
hingwi
l
lbefi
ne
Me:
WishIcoul
dbel
i
evey
ou
Bandi
l
e:Bel
i
eve 
meIwi
l
ltakecar
eofy
ou 
Heki ssedmyf oreheadt henwehugged, aft
er
thatIwentt ocooksupperbecauset hatwas
whatIal way sdidev erydaywi thBandi le'shelp
sincehewasback.Af t
ert heyat eIwashedt he
dishesandwentt omyr oom, i
twasf reaking
coldt hatdayIwasst arti
ngt oshi verBandi l
e
gav emehi shoodiej ustt okeepmewar m and
anot herblanketfort hebot hofus.If eltsafein
hisar mslikeev er
y thingwoul dchangef orme
andIwoul dleavet hismi sery.Icouldfeel my
eyesst art
ingtocl osesoIal sof ol
l
owedt hen
slept.
.
[
06/
04,
20:
26]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t2
Thefol
l
owingdayIwokeupwit
hmyhand
l
ockedwit
hBandil
e'
sItr
iedt
oyanki
toutbuti
t
washeldsot i
ght.I
'
m surehewantedtobe
awareIwasawake, sohefinal
l
yletgo.Ist
ood
upthentookoffhishoodi
ebecausethesun
wasoutalready,
helookedatmeandIl ooked
athi
m back
Bandi
l
e:Li
lonethi
sist
ortur
ewakingev
ery
day
toworkasify
ouaregett
ingpai
d!
Me:
Idon'
twanttobeweepedbecauseIwoke
upl
atebythatwoman
Helookedathi
sphonet
henshookhi
sheadand
madeasmi r
k
Bandi
l
e:Iwil
lgety
ououtoft
hishel
la17y
ear
ol
dcan'tl
iv
eliket
his
Me:
Andt
akemewher
e?
Bandi
le:
Somewher
esafet
haty
ouwi
l
lbe
secur
edandcar
edfor
 
Me:
Iwi
l
lwai
tfort
hatt
ohappen
Iopenedthedoorthentookchi
ckencor
nssoI
wenttofeedthechickeni
nthei
rpansowecan
geteggsf orev er
y daybreakfast,If
edthem then
start
edr acki
ngt hey ar
danddi dmyev ery
day
choresaf t
erthat.Wel l
lif
ewasr oughbecauseI
wassummonedt obe" Tryphina"athomebutas
Isaidt oBandilethatIhav enowher etorunto,I
hadf ait
hhewoul dmanaget ogetmeoutof
thatplace.Afterdoingev eryt
hingIneededt odo,
Ipour edcoldwat erint
oawashi ngbasinthen
wentt omyr oom andIcl osedthedoorbehind
me. 
Istr
ippeddownt henwashi ngmybodywi thmy
hands.Isuddenl yfeltshiv
er ssentbymybr ai
ns
downmyspi net omyankl es,theper sonwas
comingcloserandf eltt
hem br eathingheav il
y
onmyneck.Il ookedbacki twast hatman
l
ookingatmet henr emov edt hebasi nwi t
h
angerandpushedmet othebed, Iscr eamedat
thetopofmyl ungscal l
ingoutBandi le'
sname.
Dumani coveredmymout hwi thhishandsoI
couldnotbeabl et oscream agai nashe
i
nsertedhimsel fint
ome, I
'm suremyor gans
wer
edamagedf
rom al
lthi
scommot
ion.
 
ThedoorswangopenitwasBandilehepull
ed
Dumani awayfr
om methenpunchedhisface,
I
woremydr essandsl
appedDumani.Thenoise
broughtNonzameandtheot
hersintot
he
rondavel
 
Nonzame:
Whati
shappeni
ngher
e? 
Bandil
e:Whydon'
tyouasky
oursocal
l
ed
"boy
fri
end"?
Hemadeinver
tedcommasi
ntheai
r,Nonzame
l
ookedatDumani
Dumani
:
Wel
lIwant
edt
ofi
ndmyt
owel
s 
Me:
Youli
ar!Youwant
edt
osl
eepwi
thmef
or
t
hefour
thti
me!
Bandi
l
elookedatmewi
thapuzzl
edf
ace
Nonzame:
Hey!Don'
tyoudar
esayt
haty
our
st
epfat
herdi
dthatt
oy ou
Bandi
l
e:Four
tht
imeSi
zi
phi
we?Whenwer
eyou
pl
anni
ngt
otel
lmet
his?
Iswal
lowedhardandlookedatBandil
ewho
wasstart
ingtohesi
tat
eatmedelaying
answeri
nghisquest
ion
Bandi
l
e:Answert
hef
reaki
n'quest
ion!
Hesaidthathi
sdeepvoi
cewhichInev
erhear
d
bef
oreinmyent i
rel
i
feknowi
nghim
Me:
I,
I.
..
..
Iwasgoingt
otel
lyoubutIwasaf
rai
d
ofy
ourreact
ion
Bandi
l
e:Buty
oushoul
dhav
e
Nonzameinter
ruptedBandil
eandshehel ped
herboy
fri
end/husbandupt ostandup.Bandi
le
l
ookedatherindisbel
iefnotknowingwhatto
say
Bandil
e:Yougoi
ngt
ohelphim buther
apedy
our
daughtermoret
hantwoti
mes?
Nonzamepaidnoheed(i
gnored)towhat
Bandil
esaidandonl
yrol
ledhereyesand
bi
dding(commandi
ng)Dumani t
okeepcloset
o
hi
m. 
AnovuyoandSimamkel
ewereabitdownbut
didn'
twanttoshowemoti
onaboutt
hescenar
io
thatj
ustoccur
ed. 
Whati ftheyfel
tsincer
ef ormeevent hough
theydidn'twanttoshow?Di dtheyal
so
experienceasIdidorwhat ?Isthi
sDumani
wor t
ht r
usti
ngbyNonzameori sher
affect
ionatelovebli
ndingher?Thesewer ethe
questionsgoingthroughmymi ndinthat
second.  
Iwassoberi
ngintear
sIcouldn'
tst
opBandil
e
gavemeat i
ghthug,wipi
ngawaymyt ear
sthat
werest
art
ingtomakehi smuscul
arvestwet
. 
Hewasal sostarti
ngt oteari
ngupbecauseI
knewi ttorehim upseeingmei nt
hatstat
e.I
closedmyey esli
steningtohissharpquesti
ons
shatteri
ngmysoul intopiecesbri
ngi
ngbackt he
moment swherel i
feseemedt obeamistake
thateverhappenedt ome.Af t
ercryi
nginhis
ar
msIf i
nall
ycal
meddownandst oodonbot
h
myfeet,asIwasaboutt
oexi
ttherondav
el
Bandi
lecall
edoutmyname
Me:
What
?
Bandi
l
e:Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
Me:
Taki
ngawal
k
Bandi
l
e:CanIcomewi
th?
Inoddedt henwewal kedtogethert
otheriver,
thegi rl
swer eprett
yamazedseei ngBandi
le,we
satf oranhourorso.Tal ki
ngabouteachot hers
differencesIeventual
lytol
dhim aboutthe
traumaIwentt hrougheventearswouldescape
i
nourey esbutwemadeagoodt i
meoutofi t,
wewenthome.  
Luckily,
Iwasgi v
enaday -offf
rom cooking
supperbyNonzame.Iat ethenwashedt he
dishesandshegav emeasponget osleepin
forthefirstt
imeinforev
er,Iwasabi tshocked
byt hatbecauseitwasanunusual thi
ngf orher
t
odo.
Bandi l
eandIwentt other ondav el
wechat ted
forawhi le,
hetoldmeev ery
thinghappeningi n
hisli
fef r
om univ
ersit
ygradest ohi sl
ovelife.
HowcanIt hankGodf oranawesomebr other
thatissoopenedandgr atefultohaveasi ster
l
ikeme?Ev ery
thingthathappenedont hatday
j
ustf adesawayl i
kenothingev erhappened, so
afterthoseconversati
onswesl ept
[
06/
04,
20:
26]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t3
Thefoll
owingdayIwoket hentookabat hwith
col
dwat erthatIhadpouri nabasin.Bandil
e
wasawakesowef i
nishedtheblanketswesl ept
i
nthenIst art
edwithmychor esitwasal r
eady
i
nbloodstream.Afterworkingi
nt hathotand
bl
azingsunIwentt oseatunderat reewhich
wasinthemi ddleoftheyardandv eryhuge,
Bandil
egav emeagl assofwat erthenIgulped
i
tdownmyt
hroatl
eav
ingcol
dnessonmy
t
hroat
.
Wechat tedforawhi l
etoget
herthatman
Dumani cameov ertousandl ookedatBandi
l
e
wit
hadi sgustedface.Iwasgetti
ngscared
becauseIwasaf raidofmanwhowoul dbe
capableofmoscul ati
ngaperson
Bandi
l
e:Dev
ili
nthef
leshwhatdoy
ouwant
?
Dumani:
Whenar
eyoul
eav
ing?Youov
erst
ayed
yourv
isi
t
Bandi
l
e:Youcantel
lthatt
oyourownchi
l
dren
andIwil
ll
eaveanyt
imeIwantto
Dumani:
Bet
termindyourt
oney
oungman
causeI
'
m notyourage
Bandi
l
e:Sav
ethatcr
apy
oust
upi
dma-
BeforeBandil
ecouldfinishhisvowel apunch
cameacr ossmakinghi sexpensiv
esungl asses
poppedof f
.Thesetwower eli
kewat erandoil
theycoul
dn'tstandeachot her'
ssit
es,thefight
wasgoi nguptoanotherl
evelsoIseperatedthe
twooft hem.Nonzamecamer unningholding
Simamkel e'
sdaught
erinherarms,theywer e
breat
hingheavil
y
Nonzame:Whatar
eyoudoi
ngt
othechi
l
d
Dumani?
!
Dumani
:
Showi
nghi
m howt
orespecthi
sel
der
s
Bandi
l
e:Hahayouwantt
ogetmyr espect
,Br
o
youwil
lworkt
oearnmyrespectshame
Bandil
e'sli
pwasdroppingbitsofbloodt
hen
brusheditawaywithhi
sthumb, thensmil
ed
reveal
inghisl
eftsi
dedimple.Wewentt othe
rondavel
Me:Bandi
l
eyouwerecrazyfordoingthat
!He
coul
dhaveki
ll
edyouinaninstancejustl
iket
hat
!
Isnappedmyf
inger
stoget
herhel
etouta
chuckl
d
Bandil
e:Hewoul
dhav
eseenf
lamesf
rom a
paraf
fi
nf i
re
Me:
Hehe 
Icleanedhiswoundswhichwer enotthat
dramat i
cbutcut
sonhi sl
ips,abruiseonhislef
t
cheek.Ithenwenttomakesampandbeans
withsomemeatont hesi
def oral
lofus
becausenooneel sewantedt omakeit.Af
ter
everyoneateIwashedthedishes,Iwenttothe
toi
lettopeethenwipedafterthat
. 
Iwashedmyhandst
henironedtheclot
hes,
Nonzamecameinhol
dingthebucketIdraw
waterwi
th
Nonzame:
Wedon'
thav
ewat
eri
nthi
shouse 
Shet hrewthebucketatmeandi thi
tmycheek.
Irubbedmycheek, Iswi
tchedofftheir
onthen
start
edmy1km wal ktotheri
ver.Thiscar
stoppedinfrontofmesuddenl ythewindow
roll
eddownqui cklyitwasLungelo(r
emember
himf rom I
nsert2?Good)hesmi ledwhenhe
sawme
Lungel
o:Dear
est
 Si
zi
phi
we
Me:
Hel
l
o 
Ismi
l
edathi
m al
sodi
dhe
Lungel
o:Don'
tyouwantt
ogot
otownwi
thme?
AsmuchasIwant edtogowithIwouldnever
gowithastr
anger .All
Iwasthi
nkingwas"What
i
fhe'saseri
alkil
ler?""
Whathetakestoaplace
bey
ondthisvil
lageandneverbri
ngsmeback? "
Il
ookedathi
m andshookmyhead
Lungel
o:Pl
easeSi
zi
Me:
Ican'
tIgotal
otofhousewor
ktof
ini
sh
Hesmi l
edfai
ntl
yIcoul dseet he
disappoint
mentinhisey es.Hedr oveoff
maki ngthedustont heroadgeti ntomyeyes.I
wentt otheri
veranddr awthewat ert
hen
walkedbackhomei twasal readydawn.
Nonzamecal ledmet oherroom, shewas
sobingintearswhichwasanunsual f
ormet o
seen
Me:
MamaIheary
ouar
ecal
l
ingme
Nonzame:
Ther
eissomet
hingIhav
ebeen
meaningt
otel
lyou
Me:
Okaymamaandt
hati
s?
Moretear
swer
epouri
ngoutofherey
es,
she
br
eathedi
nandoutsl
owl
y 
Nonzame: Siziphi
weInev ermeantt odothisto
you,Iwasj ealousandangr ythatmyhusband's
chil
drenwoul dbenot hinginthisworldbutbe
givi
ngbi r
thmachi nes.Iwasdev ist
atedatthe
factthatyouandBandi lewoul dbeachievi
ng
bigthingssoIdeci dedtosendhi mt oschool
andy outost ayandalsobet hesameas
Anov uyoandSi mamkel e.
 
Myey
espoppedoutwi
tht
ear
sfor
mingal
so 
Me:
Wowjustwow,
yousuchahear
tl
essper
son.
Ar
eyouevenmymother
?
Nonzame:
YesI
'
m mybabyand-
Icutherof
fbef
oreshecoul
dfi
nish
Me:
Iwon'
tl
ist
ent
othat
Ist
oodupthenwenttothatr
ondavel
and
l
ockedmysel
fini
t.Icr
iedandcri
edti
llIsl
ept
wit
hwhatNonzamesaid.

.
..
.
[
06/
04,
20:
26]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t4
Iwaswokenupwi thsomeonebangi ngthedoor
count l
essti
mesandcal l
ingoutmyname,
"Sizi
phiwe,Si
ziphi
we".Isoundedl i
keBandile's
voice,Isl
owlyopenedmyey esbackt oEarth
withwhatNonzamesai dsti
llr
inginginmyhead.
Myheadwaspoundi ngIt hi
nkitwast heside
effectofcryi
ngandmyey eswerepuf fyIcould
feelthem.Iwascryingforeveryt
hingthatev er
happenedt omenotwhatIwast oldbythat
womant ome.Backt othestoryasIsai d
Bandi l
ewasbangingthedoorf ormet oopen
Me:
Whatdoy
ouwant
?
Bandi
l
e:Letmei
nSi
zi
phi
we
Me:
No!Justl
eav
emeal
one
Bandi
l
e:Iwon'
t,
opent
hisi
t'
scol
d
Istoodupandwentt oopenthedoorforhim,
hisfacialexpressi
onwassayi
ng"Gir
l,you
messedup! "Thoughhedi
dsaythatverbal
lyt
o
mebuti tal
lshowed.Hegavemeat ighthug,
gentlybrushingmyback
Me:Howcanshebesocruel
?Inev
erdid
any
thingt
oher!Imeandi
dshedothati
n
pur
pose? 
Bandi
le:Si
sImayhav eanswerst
oev
ery
thi
ng
butI
'm confusedaboutt
hisone 
Ijustkeptsober
ingintear
s,Iwasapersonthat
expressedmyemot i
onsintot
all
ydif
fer
entways
from cry
ingtoscreamingmylungsout.And
thisti
meIwasshowi ngmyemot i
onsverywell
,
soBandi l
etri
edhisbesttocomfortmeandhe
di
d. 
Me:
What
'st
het
ime?
Bandi
l
e:Pastoneo'
cl
ocki
nthemor
ning
Me:
Okayl
etmesl
eep
Imovedawayf
rom hi
slov
ingembraceandI
l
ayedmybodyi
nthespongethensleptagai
n.

[
Isleptf
oracoupl
eofhour
sthenwaswokenup
bysomeoneshaki
ngmeandIcouldsmel
lgood
food]

Ii
mmedi at
elyopenedmyeyesandi
twas
Nonzamehol di
ngatraywhi
chhadEngl
i
sh
br
eakfast
Nonzame:
Morni
ng 
myAngel
hopey
ousl
ept
wel
landImadeyouthi
s
Shesmil
edandst
ret
chedherar
mssoshecan
beabl
etoputt
hedoorinmylap
Me:
I'
mful
lIdon'
twanty
ourf
ood.
Herglori
oussmilesuddenl
ydi
sappear
edf
rom
herdark,gor
geousface
Nonzame:
Sizi
phi
wehowmanyti
mesandIsayI
waswrongforwhatIdi
dtoy
ou?
Ishr
uggedmyshoul
der
sandl
ookedaway
Nonzame:Ialsonevermeantt
odothistoyou
asIsaidj
ealousyandangerdrov
emet opoint
i
nl i
fewhereImadey ouaslav
einst
eadof
taki
ngtoschool
Wow!Thiswasasi
det
hatmyInev
erhear
dor
seenofmymother
 
Me:
I-
Sheplacedherf
ingeronherl
i
pst
otel
ltost
op
tal
ki
ng 
Nonzame:MybabyI'
mv erysorr
yforallt
his
nast
ythingsIdi
dtoyouandI '
m notexpect
ing
youtoforgi
vemequickl
y
Ij
ustr
oll
edmyeyesandlookedawayshe
br
oughtt
hefoi
dtowardsme 
Nonzame:
Atl
eastwoul
dyoupl
easeeati
t?
Me:
Idon'
twantt
o 
Nonzame:
Please!
 Myhear
tandsoul
madet
his
f
oryou.Atl
eastabit
e
Itookt
hefoodandatejustt
omakehergl
i
mse
butnott
odisappoi
nther
Me:
Thanky
ouf
ort
hef
ood
Nonzame:
Okaycal
lmei
fyouneedany
thi
ng 
InoddedIstartedwonder ingaboutthesudden
changeofhear t.Didanyonegi v
eherawake-up
cal
l tosetmef r
ee?Butany waysIconti
nued
eatingthenwentt owasht hedishes.Aft
era
whileIwenttopol i
shther edstoepthen
fi
nished,Anovuy ocamet ositonthegrass
whichwasaf ewcent i
metr esawayfrom me
Anovuy
o:Si
ziwoul
dyoupl
easekeepasecr
et
forme?
"
WhywouldIwanttokeepyoursecr
et?"That
waswhatIsai
dinmyheartbutnotoutloud
Me:
Sur
e 
Shewental
lti
midandsuddenl
yshewentf
rom
hundr
edtozer
o
Anovuyo:
Wel
lyouseemylast
bor
nMahl
e?(
I
nodded)Hei
sDumani'
sson 
Myeyesgrewwi deIdidn'
texpectt
oheart
hat
f
rom herorany
oneel se
Me:
Yousai
dwhat
?
Anovuyojustshookherheadandtear
swere
star
ti
ngtof al
li
nhereyes.Iqui
ckl
ywenttohug
herbecauseIcouldseethepai
ninherey
es! 
Me:I
t'
sgoingt
obeal
ri
ghtanddi
dyout
ell
mom
aboutt
his?
Anov
uyo:Idi
dbutshealsodeni
editasi
fshe
wasunderalov
epotionorsomethi
ng?
Wel
aughedatt
hati
twasqui
tecr
azybutIf
elt
asi
fitwast
rue
Me:
Whati
fthat
'st
ruet
hough?
Anov
uyo:
Iwoul
dbeabnor
mal
andamazed 
Wecontinuedt
alki
ngandIcoul
dseet
he
happi
nessinher
Anovuyo:
Sizi
phiweIwouldl
i
ketosayI
'
mreal
l
y
sor
ryforever
ythingIdi
dtoyou
Me:
It
'sokay
WesharedatighthugandIwashappythatthey
werechangi
ngandshowedthei
rlovetome.I
fi
nal
lyl
etgoandNonzamewascal l
ingmesoI
wenttoherr
oom andshewasholdingablack
pl
asti
cbag
Nonzame:
Mydearher
ear
eyourcl
othes 
Iopenedt
heplasti
citwasmycl
othest
hatI
usedtowearbefor
eshegavemeragstowear
Me:
Thanky
ousomuch
It
ookt
hebagsandwentt
opourwat
erf
orme
towash.IwenttowashthenIloti
onedwit
hthe
bodyl
otionsIgotf
rom herandworemyplum
maxidressthendi
dadoekj ustf
ortheout
fi
tto
l
ookdecent.
Iwenttothrowthewat erout
sideIsawagr ey
carcomingint
ot heyardanditstopped,2guys
cameoutandt hesecondonel ookedlike
Bandil
e.Theybothturnedtofacemei twas
real
l
yBandileandLungel o
Ohno!Di
dtheyknoweachot
her
? 
Theycamet
omebot
hoft
hem t
henBandi
l
e
gavemeahug
Bandil
e:Li
lonet
hisi
sLungel
omycl
osest
fr
iend 
Wel
ookedateachot
hernotknowi
ngwhet
her
t
osayhel
l
oorwhat
Me:
He-
Lungel
o:He-
Wesai
dthatatt
hesamet
imeandsmi
l
ed
Lungel
o:Yougof
ir
st
Me:
Howar
eyoubhut
i?
Lungel
o:I
'
mfi
net
hanksandy
ou?
Me:
I'
mfi
ne
Iwasstart
ingtogetshakeaboutthis,so
Bandi
leaskedmet opourdrinksforthem andI
wenttodoi t
.Iputt
heglassesinat r
aythen
mademywayt othebenchthattheywer e
si
tt
ingin.
 
Lungel
ocamer
ushi
ngt
owar
dsmeandt
hen
l
ookedatme
Lungel
o:Whydi
dyout
ell
meBandi
l
ewasy
our
brot
her
?
Me:
Youdi
dn'
taskhowwasIsupposet
otel
lyou

TOBECONTI
NUED
.
..
.
[
06/
04,
20:
26]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t5
Iwassi t
ti
ngwi thLungeloandBandil
einthe
rondav elnotevenattemptingtol
ist
ent othei
r
wildconv ersati
onswhichwer enott
hat
amusi ngbutt heykeptlaughingt
heyheadsof f.I
keptthinkingaboutNonzamewhowasnow
suddenl ylovi
ngmeasherowndaught erbutfor
somanyy earsshewasseei ngmeas
"Tryphina".
 
Itwasabitf
unnythatmomentar
il
ysheisnow
acti
ngmotherf
iguretomebutanyway
sIwasn't
thatpi
ssedatt
hat.
 
SoIcamebacktothesensesofthi
suni
verse
whenLungel
ocal
ledoutmynameandl ooked
atmewithasmil
ewrit
tenallov
erhisf
acewith
hi
sphonei
nhi
shand
Me:
Mhh?
Lungel
o:Ij
ustaskedy
ouaquest
ion
Ifr
ownedmyf
acet
oindi
cat
eIwasawar
eoft
he
quest
ion
Me:
Whi
chwas?Iwasn'
tl
ist
eni
ng
Hel
etoutchuckl
eaf
terIsai
dthat
Lungel
o:Whi
chGr
adewer
etakenoutof
?
Thi
swasn'
taquesti
onpeoplewouldaskmeI
i
mmediat
elyknewBandi
lehadgiv
enhim
i
nfor
mati
onaboutsi
tuat
ion
Me:
Wel
lIwasaboutt
odoGr
ade11
Het
ypedi
nhi
sphoneaf
terIsai
dthatt
ohi
m 
Lungel
o:OkaycanIhav
eyourr
epor
tcar
d?
Me:
OkayIwi
l
l
Hesmi
l
edthenwinkedhi
slef
tey
eandBandi
l
e
gav
ehi
m astar
e
Lungel
o:Yi
ntoni
 
mfet
hu?(
What
'
supdude?
)
Bandil
e:Ungamcingi
nomci ngakelowo
ndakubulal
angezandla!(
Don'tev
ent hi
nkabout
her,
Iwoul dki
ll
ypuwi thmybarehands!)
Ireal
lywantedt
olaughbecausethewayhe
saiditwassayi
ng"Amassivestorm woul
d
comey ourway"
,Onlyi
fheknewt hi
ngswere
goingdownunderhisnose.
 
Me:
Letmegoandsear
chf
ort
hatcar
d
Bandi
le:
Hur
ryupLungel
oisl
eav
ingi
nten
minut
es!
Lungelowashavi
nganansweri
nhisv
ocalsbut
heafrai
dofBandil
e,I
'
m 150/
100%sur
ethathe
wasbeatinguppeopl
ewhowouldmesshim up.
Istoodupf r
om t
hebenchthenwenttothe
room andbumpedintoNonzamesoberingi
n
tearsbutshequi
ckl
ywipedthem.Thiswoman
wasf ul
lofdramawhati
smaki nghercr
ythi
s
ti
me? !
Me:
What
'swr
ong?
Nonzame:
Not
hing 
much,
whatdoy
ouneed?
Me:
Ij
ustwantmyr
epor
tcar
d?
Nonzame:
Whydoy
ouneedi
t?
Me:
Ij
ustwantt
ore-
checki
t 
Herfaci
alexpr
essi
onj
ustchangedbutshe
noddedherhead
Nonzame:I
nthecupboar
dwhichisnextt
othe
mir
roranditi
sinabrownenv
elope
Me:
Okayt
hanks 
Irushedt othetheherr oom t
henwentto
cabinetshet ol
ditwasi n.It
ookoutthecar
d
howmuchImi ssedschool andIgli
mpsedati
t,
allIcouldseewher esixesandsevensinmy
report.SoIplaceditagainintheenvel
opeand
wentt othekitchen
Me:
Foundi
t
Nonzame:
Okay
Shesmi l
edaft
erthosewordsIwalkedtot
he
rondavelwi
thLungel
ogluedtohisphoneal
so
Bandil
eandtheyweresmi l
i
ng. 
SoIcl
ear
edmyv
oiceandt
heysuddenl
ylooked
atme
Bandi
l
e:Goti
t?
Me:
Yeap
Ihandedi
tovert
oLungel
oandheopenedi
tand
hi
sey esl
i
fted
Lungel
o:Wowt
hisi
ssoamazi
ng!
Bandi
l
e:Gotaf
termemf
ethu
Me:
Youal
i
ar!
 
Wel aughedthenaccompani edLungelotohi
s
car,
hebumpedshoul derswithBandi
lethenhe
gavemehug.Idi dn'
twanttoletgohisscent
j
ustr emindedmeoft hefir
sttimeIgotint
ohis
arms.HisCol ognewaskill
ingmemaki ngmy
soulruncrazy.Wef i
nal
lyletgoandletgo
Lungel
o:BandzIwi
l
lseey
oui
nCapeTownand
youtooSizi
Bandi
l
e:Sur
emf
ethu
Me:
(Ismi
l
ed)By
e 
Iwonderwhatdidhemeanwhenhesai d"Iwill
seeyouinCapeTown" ?Sohedrov
eoutoft he
yard,
IlookedatBandi
l
ewi t
haquestioni
ngf ace
becauseIhadmanyquestionsr
unningthrough
mymi nd
Me:HowdoesheknowIdon'
thaveGr
ade12?
Whatdoeshemeanwhenhesayshewil
lsee
meinCPT?BecauseInev
ert
oldhimt
hose
t
hings!
Bandi
l
e:Hey
!Stopwiththe1000quest
ions!He
sawmewhenIwashur t
ingwhenDaddiedandI
tol
dhi
m aboutyoursi
tuati
on.Ar
eyousatisf
ied
now?
Me:
Okaybr
o
Ihuggedhi
sar
mthenwewentt
othemai
n
house,
Anovuy
oandSi mamkelewerecooki
ng
thi
ngshaddef
inat
elychangedi
nthi
shouse!
WellDumaniwasapper ant
lyki
ckedoutoft
he
houseforvar
iousreasonswhichweresowould
bedamnconf usi
ngt omebutwewer efi
nal
ly
fr
eeandlif
ewasj ustokay.
 
Sowewenttositi
nthefami
l
yeati
ng,wat
chi
ng
Gener
ati
onsandevencomment
ingonthe
epi
sode.
 
SoBandi andIwashedthedishesthenwewent
totherondavel
werewesl epti
n.Nonzamehad
giv
enmeabedt osleepinanothershockt
o
deathabouther.
 
Wel
edont
hebedandhewasst
ari
ngatme
Me:
Spi
titBandi
l
e!
Hebr
eat
hedi
nandmur
mmed"
okay
"
Bandi
l
e:Ar
eyoudat
ingLungel
o?
Il
it
eral
lysatupst
rai
ghtget
ti
ngchokedbymy
sal
ivawhichwasgoi
ngdownmyt hroat
.
Me:
Wai
t!No!What
?
Iknewhewassmell
ingrat
sar
oundhi
m butI
tr
iedmybestt
oactnormal
Bandi
l
e:Thet
rut
hwi
l
lsety
ouf
ree
Ilookedathi
mt henmyl ong,
blackey
ebrows
roseupatthatspli
tsecondandIwasstart
ing
tofeelmyheartraci
ng
Me:
NoI
'
m not
!
Bandi
l
e:Oh!Goodni
ghtSi
zo
Herot
atedhi
sbodytof
acet
heot
hersi
deandI
al
sodidashedi
d. 
Washesuspecti
ngsomethi
ng?Iwasn'tgoi
ng
t
obeabletofoolmybrot
hercauseheknows
mequi
tewelltoknowI'
m nott
ell
ingt
het r
uth.
 
Aft
erret
hinki
ngaboutt
hequesti
oned
concer
ningLungel
oIfi
nal
lysl
ept,
asevery
thi
ng
wasjusttur
nedint
othepastandthef
utur
e
l
ookingfi
neahead..
.
..
[
06/
04,
20:
26]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t6
ThenextdayIwokeupfeeli
nghappybutt
otell
youthetrut
hIdi
dn'
tknowwhatmademehappy ,
soIstoodupandBandil
ewasnotnexttome
butthewasnoteonhispi
ll
ow.Ipi
ckeditt
hen
star
tedreadi
ng;
"Si
ziIwenttot
ownandIwi l
l
back 
XOXO"
ItoreitupthenfixedthebedandImademy
wayt othemai nhouse,IfoundSimapl ayi
ng
withhersonKhani y
olewhoissoador ableyou
couldeathim up.Iwasn'tsureofSimababy
daddybutsur el
yi twasoneofherBlessers,let
's
getbackt othetopic.It
ookKhani f
rom Sima's
armsi ntomineandIst ar
tedbaby-t
alkingwith
hi
m,Iwasamagnett
owar
dschi
ldr
ent
heyj
ust
l
ovedbei
ngar
oundmycompany
. 
Me:
Hei
sgr
owi
ngupf
astandmor
echeer
ful
Ismi
l
edatherandshesmi
l
edback
Si
ma:
Mybundl
eofj
oyy
ouknow
Inoddedthenshest ar
tedstretchingKhani'
s
footandhewasgi ggli
ngenjoyingt he
mov ementofhismom' sfi
nger s.SoIgav ehi
m
backtoSimat hentookabasi nandpour edhot
waterini
t,If
eltsomeoneelse'spr esenceinthe
kit
chensoIlookedbackt oseewhot hatwas
anditwasNonzame
Me:
Yougav
emeaf
ri
ght
! 
Nonzame:
Sor
rybabyIdi
dn'
tmeant
o,Iwant
ed
t
osaygoodmorning 
Me:
Mor
ningma
Nonzame:
Goi
ngsomewher
e?
Me:
NoI
'
m notgoi
ngany
wher
e
Nonzame:
Okaydear
ShekissedmycheekandIwentt ot herondavel
wit
ht hebasi
ninmyhands.Il ockedt hedoor
aft
ergoinginandIst r
ippeddownt hewashed
mybody ,Il
oti
onedaf t
erthatandIwor emy
bl
ackandwhi temaxi skir
tandawhi tevestalso
pumpsonmyf eet.Idoekedar oundmyheadt o
covermyhairwhichwasanabsol utedisast
er,I
wentt ot
hrowthewat erawayt henwi peditwith
myt owelandIhangedt hem ont heline.
 
Ideci
dedt otakeawalktoclearmymi nd
becauseitwasev er
ywhere,
asIwaswal king
downt heroad.I
tseemedasi fever
yonewas
l
aughingatmebecausepeopl eknewaboutme
bei
ngr apebymyst epf
ather
. 
AsIwaswal ki
ngIspott
edLungelo'
scarandthe
wasagirlt
alki
ngthr
oughhiswindow,Ididn'
t
wanttosaytheyweredati
ngorsomething.But
Ial
sothoughtmaybeitwashissi
stersoI
deci
dedtowalkpastthem j
ustt
oseehis
r
eact
ion.
Iwalkedpastt hem andLungel ocal
l
edme, I
thi
nkmyhear tmi ssedabeatandIl ookedat
back.Hisey esnav igat
edtot hepassangerdoor
soIdidasi nstructed,t
hebi r
dscameback
again.Dancingandmov i
ngar oundmystomach
andhesai dgoodby etothisgirlt
henstar
tedthe
car.
 
Lungel
o:Canwegot
otownpl
ease?
Me:
Okaywecan
Hest art
edthecart
henturnedupt
hevol
umeon
theradio,whi
chwasprett
ymuchalovesong
andIt hi
nkitwasLi
onelRi
chiexSt
uckOnYouif
I'
m sure. 
Sohedr oveoffgoi
ngataslowpaceandhe
wasn'tr
ushing,wewer ej
usttal
kingabout
random thi
ngsthatcoupl
eswoul dtal
kabout.I
noti
cedthatwewer einQueenstownsohe
stoppedbytheparkingswhichwerenextto
Spur,wegotoffthecarheopenedt herest
urant
doorf
ormet
oenterf
ir
st.Thi
sgorgeuswai
tr
ess
cametomewit
hasmileonherface
Wai
tr
ess:
Hel
l
o, 
tabl
efor2?
Me:
Yes 
Wai
tr
ess:
Okaywoul
dyoupl
easef
oll
owme?
InoddedthenLungel
oandIfol
lowedbehi
ndher
,
sheledustoatableandwesatshegaveust
he
menus. 
Wai
tr
ess:
Cal
lmei
fyouar
ereadyt
oor
der
Me:
Okay
Iwastheonedoi ngmostoft hetal
ki
ngwhile
Lungel
owasgl uedtohisphonenotev en
rai
si
nguphi sheadjusttoglanceatme,Ipaged
thr
oughthemenusear chingforsomethi
ngto
eatbutLungel
owasst il
lonhisphone
Me:
Arey
ougoi
ngt
oeaty
ourphone?
Hemovedhi
sfi
nger
sawayfr
om hisphoneand
l
ookedatmewi
thaconf
usedface
Lungel
o:Whatdoy
oumean?
Me:
Youexcat
lyknowwhatImean
Lungel
o:BabeI'
m sor
ryit
'sj
ustt
hatI
'
m busy
wit
hmybusi nessesokay?
Hestret
chedouthishandsohecanr
eachmi
ne
butIputthem onmythi
ghs.
 
Me:What
everLungel
omakesur
eitkeepsy
ou
company
!
Lungel
o:Whyar eyoubei
ngdr
amat i
cbecauseI
tol
dyouI'm handl
i
ngmybusinesses!
Di
dhejustsayI
'
m dramat
ic?
!Okayhej
ust
cr
ossedthel
imi
tli
ne 
Me:
Am Ibei
ngdr
amat
ic?Ohmywor
d! 
Lungel
o:Fl
i
p!Babe 
Thewaitr
esscameandIqui
ckl
yact
ednor
mal
soshewouldn'
tseet
hewasaconfl
i
ct
happeni
ngbeenus
Wai
tr
ess:
CanIt
akey
ouror
deror
?
Lungel
o:Youcan
Wai
tr
ess:
Whatar
eyouhav
ingsi
r?
Lungel
o:Acheeseburgerwi
thchi
ps,
alsosome
cal
amariandwingsforstar
ter
s
Shewr
otet
hatdownandl
ookedatme
Wai
tr
ess:
Andy
oumam?
Me:
Alsoabur
gerwi
thchi
psandSpr
it
efor
r
efr
eshment
Lungel
o:Mi
net
oo
Wai
tr
ess:
That
's 
all
?
Lungel
o:Yes
Shenoddedthenl
eft
,Iwasn'
tmi
ndi
ngLungel
o
unt
ilhecametosi
tnexttome
Lungel
o:Mycakes,mypununu,
myhoneyboo-
booI'
m sor
ryforsayi
ngyouweredr
amati
candI
wasoutofli
ne
Ir
oll
edmyey
esnotev
entryi
ngtoinsertt
he
i
nfor
mati
oni
ntomymind,
hestart
edt i
ckl
ingme
andIwasgi
ggl
i
ngl
i
kea3y
earol
d
Lungel
o:Iwon'
tst
opt
il
lyouf
orgi
veme 
Iwaslaughi
ngmyheadof
fandIwasst
art
ingt
o
breat
hfast
Me:
Okayf
ine,
Ifor
giv
eyou
Lungel
o:Goodgi
rl
!
Hestoppedt i
ckli
ngmeandhedeci dedtoplay
withmyf ingersandwewer ehav i
ngl i
ght
conversationswithkissesinbetween, ourf
ood
thenwedugi n.Lungelowasal sofeedingme
whichwasqui teromanticbecausemostguy s
wouldn'tdot hatt
ot heygir
lfr
iends(Ifyou
understandwhatImean) .
Afterweatesettl
edthebil
lthenwemadeour
wayt othecarandIli
ter
all
yfull
yfedsoIsatat
thepassengerseatandimmedi at
elydozedof
f
tosleep.

*
***
Iwokeupwhent hecarfel
tasifi
twasn'
t
movingsoIrubbedmyey esandyawnedatt
he
sametime.Lungel
owasst ar
ingatmewitha
smil
espreaduponhisface
Lungel
o:Di
dyouknowhowbeaut
if
uly
ouar
e
whenyouasleep?
Iwasstarti
ngtoblushIqui
ckl
ylookedaway
from hi
sdirect
ionsohewouldseemycheeks
turni
ngreddish
Me:
Wel
lIwi
l
ltaket
hatasacompl
i
ment
 
Lungel
o:Pl
easedoso
Heleanedf orwardt
henpull
edmet ohim with
mychi nandsmashedhi sli
psontomi ne,
l
eavingmewi thani
nstantt
ri
ggertomyspi ne
whi
chIdi dn'tknowwhatcauseditwhetherit
wast heenjoymentorsomethi
ngelse.
 
Wefinall
ybr
okei
twhenwebot
hwer
ebr
eat
hing
heav
ily
Me:
WowIneedt
ogetgoi
ng
Lungel
o:OkaycakesIl
ovey
ou
Thosewor
dsmademysoul li
ght
enupand
mademethinkofsuchanamazi
ngper
sonhe
was.
Washemydesti
nytoet
ernalhappi
ness?Ormy
f
utur
ehusbandi
nthemaking?Butanywayst
he
f
utur
ewoulddet
ermi
neeveryt
hingthati
sgoi
ng
t
ohappen.
Igotoffthecart
henwav edathi
m andwalked
home, Igoti
ntotheyar
dthenwentstrai
ghtto
therondavel
.Bandil
ewasthesit
ti
ngont hebed
l
isteni
ngtohisheadphonesandhelookedat
me 
Bandi
l
e:Wher
eyouf
rom?
Me:
From af
ri
end
Bandi
le:
Ibett
erhopei t
'snotsomelamedude
whowi l
lbr
eaky ourheartandmakeyoucr
y
eachandeveryday
Me:
Hewon'
thei
spur
egent
lemanandv
ery
l
ovi
ng
Bandi
l
e:Ial
way
sknewsomet
hingwasup
Me:
Thr
il
lednow?
Bandi
l
e:Bey
ondex
planat
ion
Me:
Hahabhut
i 
Wesmi
ledateachotherandhetookouta
yel
l
owenvel
opeitwaswr i
tt
enI
ntercapeout
side
Bandi
l
e:Wear
eleav
ingonFr
idayt
oCapeTown
I
twasWednesdayIwassohappywhenhesai
d
t
hat
.Iwasfi
l
ledwithj
oyandexci
tement
Me:
Real
l
y?
Bandi
l
e:Yessi
s
Ihuggedhi
m andIwasshout
ing"
ThankYou"to
hi
m.SoIchangedint
omypy j
amasthentucked
i
ntobed
Bandi
l
e:Soear
ly?
 
Me:
I'
mti
redabut
i
Bandi
l
e:Okaygoodni
ght
Icoveredmysel
fwiththeblanketandcomf
ort
er,
Iwassoexcitedtofi
nall
ygot oCapeTown
becauseIal
way ssawmy selft
here. 
Thiswasjustt
hebeginni
ngofmyl i
febecause
thi
ngswerechangi
ngsoquicklybutIwas
grat
eful
forsmallt
hingst
hatIgot,
 
Isl
eptwhenIwasf
eel
i
ngdr
owsy
.

.
..
..
[
06/
04,
20:
26]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t7
Iwokeupthefol
lowi
ngdaywi
thBandi
lesnor
ing
hi
slungsandIshookhi
mthenheopenedhe
woke
Bandi
l
e:Mhm?
Me:
Don'
tsnor
ethi
sloud
Bandi
l
e:I
sthatwhyy
ouar
ewokeme?
Inoddedandhechuckl
ed 
Bandi
l
e:Youar
ehal
l
uci
nat
ingsi
s
Me:
I'
m not
!
Hewasl aughingatmeandwentbacktosleep,
Istoodthenwentt obr
ushmyteet
houtsi
dei t
wasalreadyhot.Iwenttot
hemainhouseandI
couldsmelleggsandbaconwhenIwentin,
Nonzamewasst andi
ngovert
hestov
e 
Me:
Goodmor
ningmot
her
Nonzame:
Mor
ning 
dearhowar
eyou?
Me:
I'
mfi
net
hanksandy
ou?
Nonzame:
I'
m gooddear
,wher
eist
hatr
epor
t
car
d?
Ohno!Iwasn'tmuchofagoodli
arbutIhadto
saysomethingtoher
.Iwasst
art
ingtofeel
my
bodyichebutIhadtohol
dmysel
ftoget
her
Me:
Wel
l
..Uhm,
Ithi
nki
t'
swi
thBandi
l
ebecause
hewast
her
eonewhowant
edi
t
Nonzame:
Okaydear
,si
tdownl
etmedi
shupf
or
you
Il
etoutasi
ghofr el
i
efbutsi
lent
lysoshe
coul
dn'
tseethatIwasl
ying
AsNonzamewasdi shi
ngBandilecamein
weari
ngamuscularv estandshort
swithfl
ip-
fl
opson,sohegreetedNonzamei napoli
te
mannerbecausetheyhadanar gumentabout
megoingtoCapeTownwi thhi
m
Nonzame:
Wher
eist
hatr
epor
tcar
d?
Il
ookedatBandi
lewit
hpuppyey
essohecoul
d
nott
ell
thetr
uthabouti
t
Bandi
le:
Sizi
phi
we'
s?(Nonz
amenodded)It
ooki
t
soIcanapplyf
oraschooli
nCPTf
orher
Nonzame:Si
zi
phi
weisnotgoi
ngt
otheWest
ern
unt
ilshe'
sol
denough
Iwasl
i
steni
ngtothem exchangi
ngwor
dsabout
measifIwasn'
ti
ntheroom butIdi
dn'
twantt
o
sayany
thi
ng 
Bandi
l
e:Shei
sgoi
ngl
i
kei
tornot
!
Nonzame:
Wewi
l
lseeaboutt
hat
 
Bandi
l
e:Gameon
Nonzame:Don'
tyoudar
edisr
espectmeBandi
l
e,
I
'm noty
ourageandwil
lneverbeone
Bandi
l
e:What
ev-
Beforehecoul
dfinishhissent
enceasl apfl
ew
acrosshi
sli
ghtincompl exi
onface,hestart
ed
gri
ndinghi
steet
ht ogetherandheturnedred
andopenedhisnost r
il
swidebecauseofanger
Nonzame:
AsIsai
ddon'
tdi
srespectme
Bandi
l
e:Sav
eit
Hesatdownnextt omeandIshookmyhead
t
henheldhishand,hesqueezedmyf i
nger
s
t
ogetherandthatcausedi
ncredi
blepai
ntome
Me:
OwBandi
l
e!Youar
ehur
ti
ngme!
Bandi
l
e:Sor
rysi
s 
Hekissedmyhandandsmi
l
edbuthewasst
il
l
f
uri
ous
Me:Li
stenhere(Herai
seduphisheadt ol
ookat
me)I'
m goingtoCapeTownwi thyoutomorr
ow
nomatterwhatshesays.Iwon'
tbeliv
inghere
unt
ilamiracl
eoutofthebluepopsup 
Bandi
le:
Thatwouldmeanalottome,Iwi
l
ltake
car
eofy ouevenifi
tmeansIhavet
osacr
ifi
ce
mylastforyouIwil
lsi
s
Iwassmili
ngmyheadof fbecauseIfinall
y
real
i
sedthatImeantt
hewor l
dt oBandileeven
i
fwewoul dhavesi
bli
ngriv
alsbutthatwas
whatbr
inginguscl
oserandclosertogether.
Me:
Butwemustmakeshedoesn'
tseeuswhen
weleav
eorhel
lwi
l
lbr
eakloosewi
ththat
woman
Bandi
l
e:Andi
twi
l
l
Welaughedt
henat
ewewashedt hedishesand
Anovuy
ocameindraggi
ngherf
eetint
ot he
ki
tchen
Anov
uyo:
Mor
ning 
guy
s
Us:
Hel
l
o
Anov
uyo:
Hav
en'
t 
youseenmom?
Me:
Shewentoutandhasn'
tcameback
Anov
uyo:
Okay
Shewenttothefr
idgeandtookoutaplatet
hen
wenttowarmiti
nt hemicr
owave,Bandil
ewent
tot
hrowthewateroutsi
deandAnov uy
owas
l
ookingatme 
Me:
What
?
Anovuy
o:Ihearthatsomeonef
rom t
hehouseis
dat
ingLungelobutIdon'
tknowwho,isi
tyou?
Iwouldnotadmi tt
oherthatIwasdati
ng
LungelobecausesheperhapsruntoBandi
l
e
andtellhi
m aboutus,
Icouldn'
tri
skmuch
fur
therthanthi
s
Me:
Noi
t'
snotme
Anovuyo:
Simamkel
esaidi
t'
snotherand
cer
tai
nlynotmesowhichmeansit'
syou
Voi
ce:
Sizi
phi
we 
youdat
ingLungel
o?
Shi
t!I
'm bust
editwasBandileno!Iturnedand
hewaslookingatmewi thadisapprovalf
ace.I
hadtocomecl eanbecauseIcan'tkeeponlyi
ng
topeopl
e
Me:
YesIam bhut
i,
sor
ryi
fIdi
sappoi
ntedy
ou
Anov
uyocl
appedherhandst
wice 
Bandi
le:
Heismybestfr
iendSi
zi
phi
wecoul
dn'
t
youchoosesomeoneel
se?
Thatreal
l
yhurtmecauseahumanbei
ngcan't
choosewhotolov
ebutthel
oveyouhavecan
chooseapersonf
oryou.
Me:I
tnotl
ikeIi
ntent
ional
l
ychosehi
mtodat
e
hi
my ouknow?
Bandi
l
e:Youhav
etobr
eakwi
thupwi
thhi
m!
I
shei
nsaneori
ssomet
hingwr
ongi
nhi
spost
of
fi
ce?
Me:
Iwon'
tabl
etodosoabut
i 
Bandi
l
e:Li
kei
tornotmnt
akaDady
ouwi
l
l 
Me:
Youwon'
tmakedot
hat
Bandi
l
e:Poorsoul
youwi
l
l
Iwasn'ti
nthemoodt oargueaboutLungeloso
Iwenttotakeabasi nthenpouredwaterinit
andtookabat hi
nt herondavel
.Ilot
ionedthen
woreadenim shortwithalimet-shi
rtandflops
Idoekedtohidemyunpl easanthair
,Ithen
thr
owt hewaterandwi pedthebasinwithmy
towelandhangedthem ont heli
ne. 
Bandi
l
e:Ar
eyouv
isi
ti
nghi
m?
Iknewhewasr
efer
ri
ngt
oLungel
o
Me:
Whosai
dany
thi
ngl
i
ket
hat
?
Bandi
l
e:Di
dyousay"
Youdat
ing"
?
Hemadequotat
iaonmar
ksinthinairIjust
r
oll
edmyeyesandlef
thi
m standingthere.AsI
wasaboutt
oexi
ttheyar
d,If
eltt
hisgr
iponmy
l
eftar
m andi
twasBandi
le
Me:
What
?
Bandi
l
e:Yougoi
ngt
ocr
yinhi
sar
msnow?
Me:NoI'
mj stt
aki
ngawal
ktol
eav
eyouand
yourant
ics 
Bandi
l
e:I
'
mj ustpi
ssedt
hatmyfri
endwould
dat
emysi st
erwhil
ehe'
sinanot
herr
elat
ion-
Hepausedandr
eleasedhi
sgr
iponmyar
m
Me:
Yousai
dwhat
?
Hewasst
art
ingt
omov
eback
Bandi
l
e:Not
hing 
mnt
ase
Me:
I'
m notaf
ool
Bandi
l
etel
lmenow!
Bandil
e:Okay
!He'
sdati
nghi
slong-
ter
m
gi
rlf
ri
endwhoi sDubai
nowandshewill
beback
nextyear
Isuddenl
yfel
tli
keasidechickthatwasusedso
Icoul
dkeephim company.Ifel
ttear
sstart
ing
topouroutofmyey es,Iwasreal
lyafooltojust
agreebei
nghisgirl
fr
iendbutthi
swast hewor l
d
thatweli
vedin.Noonewoul dsaytheyareina
rel
ati
onshi
pbuty oujustbl
i
ndedbyt helov
ey ou
get.
Bandi
l
ewascomf
ort
ingme 
Bandi
l
e:Idi
dn'
tmeant
ohur
tyou 
Thatwentt hroughmyr i
ghtearouttomyl ef
t
one.AsIt houghtcr
yingwouldsolvemymessi t
j
ustcreatedmor eandIendeduphav inga
massiveheadachewhi chIcan'tevenbeginto
tal
kabouti t
.Bandil
ehushedmet osleepandI
j
ustsleptthinki
ngaboutthissi
tuati
onIwasi n.
[
06/
04,
20:
26]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t8
Iwokeupf eel
i
ngdrainedIsatonmybutt
ocks
andlookedoutsi
dethewindow,mymindwas
fi
ll
edwithquesti
onsthatneededdamnst
rai
ght
answer
sfr
om me.
Ithoughttomy selfwhywasIstressingovera
mant hatwassuccesf ul?Whohadev eryt
hing
heneededwhi l
stIdon'tev
enhaveaMat r
ic
Certi
fi
cate!Isthi
swhatIwant edtodospend
mywhol elifedoingthi
s?NoIcouldn'tdosoI
hadtobr eakallti
eswithLungel
oev enifhewas
myf i
rstl
ov er!
 
Ohi twasal readyFr
idayar ound09: 45inthe
mor ni
ng, Isl
eptinmycl othesf rom theday
before.SoIheadedt ot hemai nr oom and
Bandilewast her
emaki ngbr eakfastweari
ng
denimj eanswi thawhitepl ai
nV-neckand
bl
ackJor dans,hesmiledwhenhesawme
Bandi
l
e:Mor
ning 
sis
Me:
Hibr
o
Bandi
le:
Goandwashandgett
othebusst
ati
on
ear
lysowewon'
tmissit
.
Me:
Okaybhut
i
Itookabasinandpouredwat erthenwentt o
wash,Il
otionedthenworemyonebut tonjeans
withafl
oraltopwhichhadl aceatt heback
showingmybr aalsoNikeAi r
Forcet hatBandil
e
hadboughtmewi t
hhislastsav i
ngsbutI
al
way sthoughti
twasmor ethant hat.
 
Idoekedwi
thaf l
ower
edscarft
ohi
dmyhai
r
andmybrotherhadpr
omisedtogi
vememoney
towashmyhai r
.
Iwenttothr
owthewaterawaythenwipedthe
basi
nandhangedthem i
ntheli
ne.Iwenttothe
ki
tchenandBandi
l
ewasdi shi
ngupthengav e
memyf ood
Bandi
l
e:Wowy
oul
ookbeautmnt
ase
Me:
Thanky
oubr
other
Isatdowntoeataf
tert
hatIwashedt
hedi
shes,
NonzamebumpedintomewhenIwasgoingto
therondav
el
Nonzame:
Wazewamuhl
engani
yami
!Ubaba
wakhobezojabul
aukuthii
ntombiyakheint
le
kanj
e(Youlooksobeauti
fulmychi l
d!Your
fat
herwoul
dhav ebeenhappyt oseehis
daught
erl
ookingnicel
ikethis)
Me:
Thanky
ouma 
Nonzame:
Arey
oust
il
lconsi
der
inggoi
ngt
o
CapeTown?
Me:
YesmaI
'
m st
il
lgoi
ngnot
hingcamechange
mymind
Nonzame:I
fyousaysot
henIwi
shy
oual
lthe
besti
neveryt
hingy
ou
Me:
Thanks
Sheopenedherarmsf
ormetohugherandI
di
d,Ipull
edoutt
henwentt
opackmythi
ngsso
BandiandIcango 
Bandi
l
e:Canwego?
Me:
Yeswecan
Wewentt
othemai
nhousewi
thourl
uggaget
o
saygoodby
etot
hef
ami
l
y
Simamkele:
Hav
easaf
etr
ipguy
spl
easecome
andvi
situs
Me:
Wewi
i
lcomev
isi
t
Anov
uyo:
Wel
ovey
ouguy
sokay
?
Bandi
l
e:Lov
eyoumor
e
Iknewhewasbeingsar
cast
ictowar
dsthem
becauset
hat
'
salsohiswayofnothur
ti
nga
person
Nonzame:
Don'
tbr
ingbackgr
andki
dspl
easemy
chi
l
dren
Bandi
l
e:Wewi
l
lnev
erdoso
Nonzame:
That
'sgoodnowgobef
oret
axi
s
f
ini
shup
Wegr ouphuggedt hentookourl
uggage,
AnovuyoandSimamkel eaccompani
edusto
getataxi
.TheyleftafterwegotataxiIwas
exci
tedbecauseitwasmyf ir
stt
imeoutofthe
provi
ncetoanotherandont opofthatIwas
goingwit
hmybr other.Wet ookanot hert
axit
o
buyourfoodforthejourneyafterthatwetook
anothert
axit
otot heofficessti
lli
nQueenstown.
Wegotof fattheI
nt er
capeoff
iceswithour
l
uggagear ound14:20andthecoacheswer e
l
etti
ngthepeopleintothei
rseats.SoIhanded
overthet
icketswhileBandi
lewenttogivethe
secondcoachourluggaget ol
oadi t
. 
Hecamebackwi thablanketandearphonesi
n
hi
sar msthenwenttoseatinthedeckeri
nthe
fi
rstseat
sinthebus.
Iwassmi l
i
ngmylungsoutBandil
ewascool
,I
under
standwhyhewasn'tt
hatexci
tedhewas
usedtobusesandal
lthat
.
I
tst
art
edmov
ingandIwaswat
chi
ngt
her
oad.
 
WelisteningtohismusiconhisphonewhichI
qui
teenjoy edespeci
all
yhip-
hop,ar
ound18:30
wewer einGr aaf
-Rei
nettandwewer egi
vena
15mi nutebreaktogoandbuyi t
emsy oumay
need.Bandi
ledidn'
twantmetogobecausehe
thoughtIwouldgetl
ostandal
lthat
,mybrot
her
though(smil
ing)
. 
Hecamebackwi t
hMay nardsandwatert
hen
st
art
ingtal
ki
ngaboutcrazythi
ngsli
kehis
gi
rl
fr
iendsandal
lthat
.Around23:45wewerein
Geor
gey esi
ntheWesternCape 
Me:
Arewecl
oset
oCPT?
Bandi
l
e:Youcoul
dsayso
Me:
Okayt
hat
'sgood
Bandi
l
e:Nowsl
eepi
tlat
efory
out
obest
il
l
awake
Me:
Okaydad
Heletoutachuckl
ethenki
ssedmyf
orehead
andIsleptonhi
schest.

*
***
Someonewasshaki
ngmesof
tl
yandIopened
myey
es
Me:
What
?
Bandi
l
e:Wehav
ear
ri
vedi
nCPT
Myey eslit
eral
lypoppedopenandIlooked
around,thi
swasev er
ythi
ngIsawaboutCape
Town.Wegotof fthebusandwenttocoll
ect
ourluggage,Bandil
ewast al
kingonhi
sphone
thencamecl osertome
Bandi
l
e:Wewi
l
lgoi
n5 
Me:
Okaywhat
'st
het
ime?
Bandi
l
e:Pastsev
en-
thi
rt
y
Isimplynoddedthenaft
erthat5minutesa
sil
verGolfGTIst
oppedinfrontofus,
thishot,
tal
lmancameoutofi tthenbumpedshoul der
s
withBandil
eandglancedatme
Guy:
MfethuImi
ssedy
ou,
whydi
dyoul
eav
eme
her
ealone?
Bandi
l
e:Youwer
ebusywi
thy
ourchi
cksowe
di
dn'
twantt
odi
stur
byou
Guy
:Iheary
oubr
a,l
etmeguesst
hisi
sSi
zphi
we?
Didal
lBandi
l
e'sf
ri
endsknowaboutme?Thi
s
dude
Me:
Int
hef
leshbhut
i
Guy:
AndI
'
m TaZubuty
oucancal
lmeZusi
phe,
ni
cemeet
ingy
ou
Inoddedt henweshookhandsandhesmi l
ed
revealinghisdimplesalsodidIrevealmine,
their(Bandil
eandZu)l oadedt hel
uggagei nthe
boot .Wegoti nandZust artedtheengineand
drov eoff,
theywer eshowingmemanypl aces
andIsawawhi teboardwithSeapointinblue
wor ds.Zust oppedinfr
ontoft hi
samazi ng
apar tmentswhichlookedliketheycosteda
fort
une
Bandi
l
e:Thi
siswer
eIst
ayImeanwer
ewear
e
goi
ngtostay
Me:
Theyl
ookni
ce
Wegotof
fwi
thourluggageandwentin,
he
pr
essedt
hel
i
ftbut
tonthenwegotintoit
 
Bandi
l
e:Pr
esst
he10t
hfl
oorbut
ton
Hest
aysi
nthe10t
hfl
oor
?! 
Me:
10t
habut
i?Sohi
gh 
Bandi
l
e:Qui
tebet
tert
han20
Wegotofftheli
ftthenheopenedadoorwhi ch
was2doorsaway sfrom theli
ftandwewenti n.
Wow!Wast hewor dIwoulduset odescribehis
apar
tmentitwasblackandwhi te,heshowed
mearoundthiswasheav enonEar th.Sohe
showedmemyr oom ithadamar oonandwhi te
j
ustasIeverimaginedmyr oom woul dbe. 
Ichangedintomypy
jamasandt
uckedi
ntobed
thenslept
..

.
..
[
06/
04,
20:
26]Ron:

APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t9
Iwokei nfr
eshwhiteli
neninacomf ortabl
ebed
thatIneversl
eptoninmyentirelif
e.Ipushed
theli
nenawayf rom mybodythenst oodup,I
l
ookedar oundtheroom i
twasr eall
yniceasi
fa
KingorQueenwassl eepi
ngthere. 
Iopenedthecurt
ainsandther
ewasadoor
behi
ndit,
curiosi
tytookov
erIopenedt
hedoor
i
twasabal conyandIwentont oi
t.
 
Icouldfeelt
hesalt
yseabreezehi
tmyfacei
n
splendidway,t
hiswasal
lIeverdr
eamn'
tof
eversinceIwasmadeaslave. 
Afterafewmi nutesofstandi
ngthereIwentto
thebathroom (Theroom wasaen- sui
te)i
ta
decentplacewhichhadbl ackstr
ipesandwhit
e
ti
lesaroundthewal lal
soont hefl
oor,
thewasa
massi
vebat
htub,
showerandt
oil
eti
none
r
oom. 
Iranthebatht
ubwaterandtookoffmycl
othes
thenIsoakedmybodyinthewater
.
Somet hi
ngwasf ishyaboutBandileIknowhe' s
myf l
eshandbl oodbuthowcanast udentbe
stay
ingataf l
atli
ket hi
s?Hemayhav eapart-
ti
mej obandasav ingsaccountbuttheyboth
coul
dn'tcoverallthef i
nancesofhi
s!Iwas
star
ti
ngt of
eel i
nsecur eabouthim soIfi
nished
waterthenIdri
edmybody . 
Ilot
ionedthenworemyshor t
swi thasportsbr
a
andslippersonmyf eet,Itr
iedcombi ngmyhair
butitwassopai nf
ulandIl etitbe.Iwent
downst ai
rsusi
ngthest air
caset hatstoppedat
theentranceoftheli
vingroom.
Thewasapl asmat v,
asoundsy st
em wi t
ha
DstvExpl
orardecoderandtal
lspeakers.Myj
aw
droppedwhenIsawt hosethi
ngsev enthe
coucheswereleather
,Iwentt
ot hekit
chenand
openedt hefri
dgewhichwasfull
ypackedwi t
h
goodies.Itookoutamilkcart
oonthen
searchedforabowl andfoundit
,IpouredCorn
FlakeswithmilkthenIj
umpedont othekit
chen
counterandstart
edeatingmycereal.
 
Ifel
tshi
ver
sgoi
ngdownmyspineli
keif
someonewaswatchi
ngme,Il
ookedbacki
t
wasLungel
owit
hhiseyesgl
uedonmyback
Lungel
o:Si
zibabe
Iwant
edt
opuckt
hati
nst
anceofhi
m say
ingmy
name
Me:
HiLungel
o
Lungel
o:Notev
enahug?
Me:
Didy
ouaskf
ori
t?
Lungel
o:Ouch!Whatdi
dIdot
ogett
hecol
d
shoul
derfrom y
ou?
Hecamecl osertot
hecounterandputhi
s
warm handsonmyt hi
gh,Iwasreadytoask
hi
m butfir
stl
yIremovedhishandsfr
om me 
Me:Whenwer
eyougoi
ngt
otel
lmeabouty
our
gi
rl
fr
iend?
Heswall
owedhardandwasshockedi
fImay
sayduet
otheexpressi
ononhi
sface
Lungel
o:How?Whot
oldy
ou?
Me:
Justanswert
hedamnquest
ionLungel
o!
Hebr
eat
hedoutl
oudandl
ookedont
hef
loor
Lungelo:YesIhaveagirl
fri
endwhoisi
nDubai
,
butSiziphi
wet otel
lyouthetr
uthIdol
ovey
ou
al
otmor ethanherImeanit
Me:That'
swhatallguy
ssayIl
ovey
oumor e
t
hanherbutIwon'tbeafool
edbythosewor
ds
i
t'
sov erLungel
o!
If
eltsomethi
ngsli
dedownmyshoulder
sasi fI
wascarry
ingalar
geburdenonmyshoulder
s
Lungel
o:NotnowSi
ziIr
eal
l
ylov
eyou
Me:
Likei
tornot
,wear
ehi
stor
y
Isl
i
deddownt
hecount
ert
henr
insedmypl
ate
andwi
pedi
tthenpl
acedi
tbackt
oit
'spl
ace.
Me:
Iwi
l
lcal
lBandi
l
efory
ou
Lungel
osimplynoddedsti
l
lpuzzl
edatwhatI
sai
dtohim,IwenttoknockatBandi
l
e'sdoor
andheshouted"Comein"
Bandi
l
e:Li
lone 
Me:
Abut
iLungel
oiswai
ti
ngf
ory
oudownst
air
s 
Bandi
l
e:Okayt
hanks
Imademywayt
othedoor
Bandi
l
e:Her
eissomemoneyt
ogoanddoy
our
hai
r
Me:
Arey
out
aki
ngme?
Bandi
l
e:Nopey
ouwi
l
lgoal
one
I
shecr
azy
?Idon'
tev
enknowCapeTown
Me:
Excuseme?Al
one?
Bandi
le:
Youwi
l
lcal
lacabt
ocomeandpi
ck
you 
HehandedmeaSamsungGalaxyNotewit
h
t
hreeR200not
esandheki
ssedmyf or
ehead
Bandi
le:
Ihav
etor
ushsomewher
eandIl
ove
youli
lone
Me:
Okaybhut
i,l
ovey
out
oo
Hetookhi
sbi
kerj
acketandphonethenI
wat
chedhiml
eave,Iwentt
omyr oom. 
Iworemybl ackhigh-ri
sejeanswit
hablack
vestandaf l
oweredlongcardiganwhi
chwas
j
ustabovemyknees.Iwor eablackandwhite
NikeRoshethendoekedmyheadt ohidethe
hair
,Ical
ledacabusi ngthenumberBandile
gavemeandt hedri
versaidhewill
bether
ei n
10mi nut
es. 
Iwentoutthenlockedt hedoorandpressedthe
l
iftbut
tontoopen, Ist
eppedi nt
henpressedthe
Groundbutton.IgotoffthenIwait
edforthe
cabtoarri
veandf i
nall
yi tdi
dthenIwentin
Dr
iver
:Af
ter
noonmam,
wher
ear
eyougoi
ng
t
oday
?
Me:
Anear
bysal
onwoul
dbeokay
Dr
iver
:Okaymam
Hedroveanddr ovehewasshowi ngmepl aces
l
ikemallsandallthat
.Thedri
verstoppedat
beautysal
onsoIpai dandgotoff,Iwentinand
ever
yone'seyesfocusedonme.Okay !Thatwas
abitawkwardsoIwentt otherecepti
onist
Rec:
Hel
l
omam,
howmayIhel
pyout
oday
?
Me:
Hell
oIwouldli
ket
orel
axmyhai
rthendoa
medi
um st
rai
ght-
up
Rec:
Thatwi
l
lbeR300al
toget
her
IgaveheraR400t hengotmychangebackand
wenttositatanattendant
,It
oldherwhatI
wantedtodo.Shest art
eddoi
ngmyhai rt
hen
brai
deditaft
erthat
Att
endant
:Awumhl
enont
ombi
(Youar
eso
beaut
if
ulgir
ly)
Ismi
l
edatherwi
thmydi
mpl
esr
eveal
i
ng 
Me:
Enkosi
sisi
(Thanky
oumam/
sist
er)
Ihuggedherf ormakingmebeaut i
ful
,my
stomachwasgr umbli
ngIexi tedthesalonthen
walkedtothemal lwhichwasnotf ar.Iwentto
Steersandplacedmyor derthenwentt ositat
thetabl
e,Iwasdownl oadingsongsandapps
unti
lsomeonecl earedtheirt
hr oatandIlooked
up.Itwasanav erageheightedgi r
lwhohada
greatbodyandabi gbust
Gir
l:
CanIsi
ther
e?Ihav
ebeenst
andi
ngf
or
ages
Me:
Def
inet
ely
Shepul
l
edoutt
hechai
randsatdown
Gi
rl
:I
'
m ThandazwaMot
samai
 
Shepul
l
edoutherhandf
orahandshake
Me:
AndI
'
m Si
zi
phi
weLonoko,
nicet
omeety
ou
Weshookhandsandsmi
l
edateachot
her
Thandazwa:
Nicet
omeety
out
oo
Wej
ustgi
ggl
edaf
tert
hat
Myf
oodcameandThandazwa'
sal
so
Me:Thatmycuet
oleav
e,i
twasni
cemeet
ing
you 
Thandazwa:
Met
oobutIneedy
ournumber
s
babes
ThisThandazwagi
rlwassomet
hingel
se,
she
seemedquiteout
goi
ng. 
Me:
072*
***
***
Iwasactual
l
yr eadi
ngthem of
fthescr
eenof
theSamsungsosheal sogavemehers.We
shar
edahugt henIbrokeit
Thandazwa:
Ihopet
oseey
ouagai
n
Me:
Ial
sodoI
It
ookmyor derthenwewalkedtothedoorand
wentourseper
ateways,Ical
ledt
hecabandI
wenttoi
t.Ipai
dagainthenhedroppedmein
f
rontoft
heapar
tment
sandIwentt
oBandi
l
e's.
 
IopenedthedoorthenIthr
ewmy sel
fonthe
couchandatewhilewatchi
ngsomemov i
eson
CatchUp.Iwasfeeli
ngabitsl
eepysoIjustl
aid
myheadont hecouchcushionandslept
.

*
**
[
06/
04,
20:
26]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t10
"Wakeup"saidavoi
ceclosetomyl ef
tear,I
sl
owlyopenedmyey eswhil
erubbingthem t
o
getaclearv
isi
on.I
twasBandileholdi
nga
brownpaperbagwhichl
ookedli
keitwasfrom
KFC, 
Me:
Heyabut
i,what
'st
het
ime?
Bandi
l
e:Pastt
en-
thi
rt
y
Me:
Andy
ouhav
ejustar
ri
ved?
Bandi
l
e:Yesi
twashect
icatwor
k
Isatupstrai
ghtsohecoul
dbeablet
osi
t,
Bandil
ejustthr
ewhisbodyhi
tt
ingmewi
thhi
s
l
eftshoulderonmyarm.
Me:
Ouch!
 
Bandi
l
e:Sor
rysi
sandIboughty
out
his
Me:
Thanksabhut
i,sot
ell
mewher
eisy
our
wor
k?
Isnatchedt
hepaperbagfrom him andtooked
outthebox,asIaskedBandi
lethisquestionhe
j
ustlookedatmewi thaconfusedf ace 
Bandi
l
e:Comeagai
n?
Me:
What
'sy
ouroccupat
ionbr
a?
Bandi
le:
Well
I'
m anaccount
antataf
ri
end'
s
busi
nessandthat
'
sit
Somethingwasjustnotri
ghtaboutwhat
Bandi
lesaid,
yesheisv er
ygoodinAccount
ing
butno.Ihadtofi
ndoutaboutthis
Me:
Buty
ouar
est
il
ldoi
ngy
ourl
asty
ear
?
Bandi
l
e:YesI
'
m 
Me:Youstayi
nthi
sbeaut
if
ul,
enor
mousf
latbut
yousti
l
linvar
-
Bandil
e:Won'ty
oustopwiththeseonemil
li
on,
fuckenthr
il
li
onquesti
ons!Ineedtogoandli
e
down
Wow!Thatwasaf i
rstdidIjustletmybr ot
her'
s
angersideunl eash?Isuddenl yfeltwrongf or
askinghimt hosequest i
ons.Iheardt hedoor
from upstai
rsbei ngslammedhar dt oclose.I
l
ostmyappet i
teandcl osedthef oodt hen
placeditont hecoffeet abl
e,Iswi t
chedof fthe
televi
son.
AsIwentupt hestair
sIstoppedtoknockat
Bandil
eroom butIstoppedmy sel
ffr
om bei
ng
shoutedat,Il
efthi
mt obe.Iwenttomyroom
thenchangedintomyshor tpy
jamasandtucked
i
ntobed.Iletmybodyshutdownandsl ept.
Iwaswokenupbyhungerwhi chinvadedmy
stomachthenIqui cklyfixedmybed, Isprayed
myhairwithanAnt i
-Dandr uf
fHai rSpraybefore
Icoul
dtakeashower .Istri
ppeddownt hen
mademywayt ot hebat hroom, takingalong
warm showerwhi chj ustleteverysingleknoti
n
mybodydi sappeared.
Ithendri
edmybodyandl ot
ioned,It
ookouta
blackmaxi dresswithawhi tevestandabr a.I
wor et
henqui cklywentdownst air
sstrai
ghtto
thekit
chen, t
hesmel lofbaconandeggsmade
mer uncrazyl i
kealunatic.Bandil
ewasdi shi
ng
upandsmi ledwhenhesome, hecameand
tookmyhandsl ocki
ngt hem withhis
Bandil
e:Pr
incess,
I'
m sorrythatIsnappedl
ast
ni
ght.It
'sj
ustthatyouwer easkingmany
questi
onsandIcoul dn'
thandleit
Me:I
'
m alsosor
ryf
orst
icki
ngmynosei
nyour
busi
ness
Bandi
l
e:I
t'
sunder
standabl
esi
s,hugmay
be?
Me:
Thoughty
ouwoul
dnev
erask
Heopenedhi
sarmsandIwentst
rai
ghtf
or
t
hem,itwasj
ustanemot
ional
hugandIbroke
i
t 
Bandi
l
e:Shal
lweeat
?
Me:
Hel
lyeah
Welaughedatt
hatIsatdownontheki
tchen
chai
rwhichwasbehi
ndthecount
er
Bandi
l
e:BonAppet
it
e!
Ismil
edwewer ehavi
ngaj
oll
ygoodt
alk
toget
heraft
ereat
ingwewashedt
hedi
shes
toget
her.
Iwoul dsaymyr elat
ionshipwithhim wasat i
ght
one,weespeci al
lyhim didn'
tletanyonecomei n
betweenus.Wehadt hatbrot
her-si
sterbond
together,
didIment i
onhehadacar ?NoIdi dn't
,
wellheisdriv
ingaGol f7whichcamet osupr
ise
tomecauseIwasn' tsurewher ehegott he
moneyf rom. 
Bouncing,
rejoi
cedt
othepar
twher
ewewe
washingdishes.
 
Wef i
nishedwashingthem andhewentt ohis
room totakeashowerwhi lstIwaswatching
someRegul arShow.After30mi nutesormore,
Bandil
ecamewi t
hhisCologneessencef il
l
ing
theli
vi
ngr oom whichwasabsol ut
elyamazing.
Hesaiddownnextt omet hencatchedthe
channelwiththeremote
Me:
Bendi
sabukel
epha!(
Iwasst
il
lwat
chi
ng!
)
Bandil
e:Si
sit
hisi
smyapar
tmenti
fIwantt
o
changeIwill
change
Ijustrol
l
edmyey esandlethim be,
mylipstook
ov ermyface.Ialmostl
ookedlikeaduckli
ngin
thepond, Bandi
lewaslaughingatme
Bandi
l
e:Remov
ethosel
i
pswena(
you)
!
Idi
dashesaidt
henwentupst
air
stotaket
hat
Samsunghehadgi
venmeandIloggedonto
WhatsApp.
 
Iwasstart
edchat
ti
ngwit
hThandazwa(
thegi
rlI
metatSteers,
doyour
emember?)
Thandi
:
Fri
endar
eyouf
reet
hisaf
ter
noon?
Me:
Yeswhy
?
Thandi
:Iwoul
dli
keust
ogot
oWat
erf
rontof
possi
ble
Me:Okaycool
,Iwi
l
laskf
ormybr
other
's
approv
alfi
rst
Thandi
:
Wil
lher
efr
om y
out
hen,
Ciao
Me:
Ciaot
oo
Ididn'
texcatl
yknowt hemeaningoftheword
butIjustusedit
,soIwentoutofWhat sApp
thenwentdownst ai
rsBandil
ewassleepingon
thecouchsideway s.Ishookhi
m andhe
openedhisey es
Me:Bhut
iaf
ri
endi
staki
ngmeoutt
oWat
erf
ront
canIgo?
Hequi
ckl
ysatup
Bandi
l
e:Whoset
hatf
ri
end?
Me:Agi
rlImetyest
erdayatSt
eer
s,wej
ust
becamefri
ends
Bandil
e:Ar
eyououtofyourmi
ndorsomet
hing?
Goingoutwit
hastrange?
Me:
Noandshe'
snotast
ranger
Bandi
l
e:Okayi
fshe'
snott
ell
meherf
ull
name
Me:
It
'sThandazwaMot
samai
 
Bandi
l
e:Okaybuty
oust
il
lnotgoi
ng
Me:
Pleasebhut
i!
Heshookhi
sheadno!HowIal wayslongedto
gotoWater
frontmyentir
eli
fe,
Iwentupstai
rs
tomyroom anddial
l
edThandazwa'
snumber .
Shepi
ckedupont hesecondri
ng
Her
:Si
zi
Me:
Ican'
tgo 
Her
:Di
dyourbr
otherdi
sappr
ove?
Me:
Yes 
Her
:Cool
wewi
l
ljustgoonanot
herday
Shesoundedabi
tdi
sappoi
ntedf
rom whatI
coul
dhere
Me:
Yes,
Iwi
l
lmakei
tupt
oyou
Her
:I
t'
sfi
neby
e
Me:
Bye
Wehungupandt hesamet i
meIreceiv
eda
messagef rom Bandil
esayi
nghewi l
lbebackso
Ijustignor
editandlaidonthebed.Iwas
tossinglef
tandrightthi
nki
nginmymi nd"Can
hehav esomei nf
ormat i
onaboutthi
ssocall
ed
"Accountantj
obofhi s"?
Curiousit
ystrucki nonceagain,Iquickl
ysli
pped
i
nmyf lopswhi chwereinfrontofmybedandI
racedtot hestudywhi chwasaboutt wodoors
awayf rom mine.Iopenedi tthenfearji
ngl
edi t
's
wayi nt
omyent i
rebody,Il
eftthedooropenj ust
i
ncasesomet hinghappens.Iwassear chi
ngf or
mindblowingi
nfor
mati
onfrom t
hecupboar
ds
unti
lIcameacrossaf
olderwhi
chcaughtmy
ful
latt
enti
on
Me:
MrM Lonoko'
sWi
l
l,okay
Ipagedthrought
hefi
rstpageithadsome
i
niti
alsandwhatsoever.Thesecondonehad
mynameoni t
Me: Iherebyleavemydaught erwit
hadouble
storyhouseandhal famil
liontocompl
eteher
educat i
onandanot herhalftodowhatevershe
mayr equi
re.Myj awwasopenedwi dethatmy
fatherwasr oll
inginser
iousmoneybeforehe
died. 
Ithoughtt
omyselft
hisi
swhyBandi
l
edeci
ded
tobringmetoCapeTown?

.
.
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul
I
nser
t11
Iconti
nuedpagi ngthewi l
l,
Bandil
ealsogota
mill
i
onl ikeme.Sot hat'swhyhel i
vedinthese
apart
ment sandalsoboughthi mselfacar,If
elt
sohorribleforthi
nkinghewoul dgethimselfi
n
dodgybusi ness.That'
swhywear etaughtto
askbefor espreadi
ngt hingsthatar
euntrue,I
heardtheapar tmentdoorcl oseandsomeone
cal
li
ngoutmyname.  
Foot
stepswerealreadygoingupthest ai
tcaseI
hadnowher etohi
debutunder neaththetable,
I
qui
cklymademywayunder .Myheartwas
beat
ingatahighratethatneverhappenedt o
mebef or
e. 
Shit!Idi
dn'tclosethedoorwhenIcamei nthe
study,Icouldsenset r
oublecomingmyway .I
sawAdi dast ekki
esinfrontoft
hetabl
eand
cameexact l
ytheplaceIwashidingmyself
.
Ij
umpedandhitmyheadonthet
abl
ebecause
ofLungel
o'
sfacewhi
chscar
edmetodeat
h.
Lungel
o:Serv
esy ouri
ght
!Whyar
eyouhi
dind
underyourbrot
her'
stabl
e?
Ihadt
ocomeupwi
thsomet
hingl
i
abl
e
Me:
Iwassear
chi
ngf
ormyear
ri
ngs 
Lungel
o:Hahadon'
tyoudar
ef ool
memydear
.
Nowgetupandl et
'sgotoyourbrot
her
Me:
No!No!Andy
ouwi
l
lsaywhatt
ohi
m?
Lungel
o:Thaty
ouwer
einhi
sst
udyduh!
Hehadi
mit
atedagi
rl
'
svoi
cebutdef
inat
elynot
mine
Me:
Ihat
eyou 
Lungel
o:AndIl
ovey
ou
Ij
ustrol
l
edmyeyesandfol
l
owedhi
mt othe
l
ounge,t
hewer
e5guy si
ncl
udi
ngBandi
lesi
tt
ing
i
nthesofas
Lungelo:
Ifoundheri
nyourst
udy
,hi
dingunder
thetable
Theguy
swer
elaughi
ngasi
faj
okewast
oldt
o
t
hem
Bandi
le:
Iwi
lldeal
withyoulat
er(hepoint
edat
me).Thi
saremyf r
iendsLi
tha,Avuy
il
e,Zusi
phe,
Sandi
le,
Bry
son
Bry
sonl
ookedl
i
keaColour
edguybutIwasn'
t
sur
eandhewasst
ari
ngatme
Them:
Hi 
Me:
Hel
l
o
Ithenl
eftthem t
omyr oom, It
ookthephone
andpluggedintheearphonesthentur
nedonDj
SnakeftBipol
arSunshinexMiddleandismy
favour
it
esongwhi chalwaysgotmedancing.
 
Iwentdownst air
st otheki
tchenImademy sel
f
acheesesandwi chandpouredmy sel
fjui
ce,I
waschat t
ingtowi thThandazwaonWhat sApp
weact ual
lygettokneweachot hers
personali
ti
es.Ifeltsomeonetappingmeonmy
shoulderIlookedbackitwasBr yson
Br
yson:
CanIhav
eagl
assofwat
er?
Me:
Sur
e
IstoodthenwenttotakeaglasssoIcoukd
pourhim water
.Hiseyeswerefocusedonmy
everymov ementIdi
d,andgaveittohi
m
Br
yson:
Thanksy
ou,
what
'
syourname?
Me:
Sizi
phi
we
Br
yson:
Suitsy
ouper
fect
ly,
yourbodyand
ev
eryt
hing
Ismi
l
edathi
m becausehewast
ryi
nghi
sluck
onme
Br
yson:
Eveny
oursmi
l
e
Voi
ce:
Don'
ttr
yyourl
uckonher
I
tsoundedasLungel
o'
sdeepv
oiceandi
twas
r
eal
ly
Br
yson:
Whosai
dI'
mtr
yingmyl
uckonher
?
Lungel
o:Thet
hingsy
ouwer
esay
ingt
oher
Me:
Lungel
ojustshutupokay
!Br
ysoni
sbei
ng
f
ri
endl
ythanmostpeople
Br
yson:
ThanksSi
zi
Lungel
o:Ipr
omi
sehewi
l
lhur
tyou
Me:Orbecauseyoujustgav
esomeonean
exper
ienceonthat
?
Lungel
o:Nobut
Me:Justsav
eitIdon'
tneedt
oheary
our
nonsense
Iwasr
eall
yannoy
edbyLungeloandhi
sjaw
wasonthefl
oorf
rom whatIsai
d
Br
yson:
I'
m sorr
yaboutthatSizi
phi
weokayandI
wasn'
ttr
yingmyluckony ou
Me:
It
'scool
mannohar
dfeel
i
ngs
Heraisedhi
shandforahigh-
fiveandIgavehi
m,
Lungelost
ormedoutofthekit
chenandflati
n
anangrymannerbutIdi
dn'tmindhisat
ti
tude
youknow. 
Bandi
lecal
l
edmet
osi
twi
tht
hem andIsatnext
tohi
m
Zusi
phe:
Bra'
sdon'
tyouwantsomet
ake-
away
s?
Av
uyi
l
e:Youpay
ing?
Zusi
phe:
Yesi
t'
sonme
Sandi
l
e:Let
'shi
tther
oad 
Bandi
l
e:Canshecomet
o?
Bryson:
Whywoul
dn'
tshe?Si
ziy
oucancome
too
Me:Okayt
hanks,
letmegoandchangemy
shoes
Iwaswear ingslippersandt heguysagr eedsoI
wentt omyr oom andwor emyr edNi keRoshe.
Wewentoutoft hef l
atandIlockedaf tergoing
out,wegoti ntoabl ackMercedeswhi chl ooked
l
ikeami nibus.Av uy i
lewasont hedriv er'
sseat ,
theywerechat ti
ngupaboutt heygir
ls, sexlife
andev ennastythi ngsthatweredisgust ing.
Guy sdotalklamet hi
ngswhent heyar e
together
,soInot icedwewer einoutsidea
butchery 
Me:
Wher
ear
ewe?
Bandi
l
e:Khay
eli
tsha
Me:
Wow
Wewentoutt
henZusipheorderedthenwentto
br
aait
hemeat,Iwastal
kingtoBrysonbecause
wefi
ndsomethi
ngint
eresti
ngtotalkabout
Av
uyi
l
e:Whathappenedt
oLungel
o?
BrysonandIlookedateach,
Ishr
uggedmy
shoulder
stogether
. 
Weatethenspentsometi
meIwasget
ti
ngto
knowtheguysandtheywer
epr
ett
yawesome
peopl
e. 
Aft
erawhil
eAv uy
il
edr
oveBandi
leandItot
he
apar
tment
,droppi
ngusonthedr
iveway
. 
Av
uyi
l
e:Ni
cemeet
ingy
ouSi
zi
phi
we
Me:
Mypl
easur
eby
e
Them:
Bye 
Wewav
edandheof
fdi
sappear
ingi
nthose
busystreet
s.Iwasl eadi
ngthewaytot he
apartmentrunni
ngawayf rom Bandi
l
e'slect
ures.
Ithenwentstrai
ghtt omyroom andlocked
my sel
finit
,Icheckedthetimeitwas21:45soI
changedintomyGr annynight
dressandputon
af l
owereddoek. 
Iqui
ckl
ydozedof
ftosl
eep.

.
..
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t12
Shekhi
nahftKy leDeustchxBackToTheBeach
st
artedpl
ayingandt hatindi
cat
edsomeonewas
gi
vingmeacal l.Whowoul dwanttodi
stur
bme
asIwassleepingsopeacef ul
ly
? 
Isearchedformyphoneundert hepil
l
owand
gotit
, Il
ookedwithabl
urvi
sionatthecall
erI
D.
Itwasapr i
vatenumbersoIpickeditup
Me:
Sizi
hel
l
o
Cal
l
er:
Hel
l
o,am Ispeaki
ngt
oSi
zi
phi
weLonoko?
Shesoundedl
ikeapr
off
esi
onal
whoi
sused
cal
li
ngpeopl
e24/7
Me:
Yest
hisi
sher
 
Cal
l
er:
Howar
eyoumam?
Me:
I'
mfi
net
hanksandy
ou?
Cal
l
er:
I'
m okay
,Ihav
egoodnewst
omakey
our
morni
ngdear
Me:
Real
l
y?Iwoul
dneedt
hat
!
Call
er:
Well
, y
ouhavebeenacceptedtoour
schoolandyoumaycomet ocoll
ectyour
unif
orm pl
usatouronThursdayaft
ernoon
around12:45
IwasscreamedsoloudI
'm qui
teposit
ivethat
theper
sonremovedthephonefrom t
heirear
Me:
Real
l
y?
Cal
l
er:
Yes,
wil
lsendane-
mai
ltoshowy
our
accept
anceandmynameisLi
zzyCampbel
lso
youwil
laskformeatt
her
ecept
ion
Me:
Okayt
hanky
ousosomuch
Her
:Okaydear
,enj
oyy
ourmor
ningby
e
Me:
Bye
Ihungupandstart
edjumpi
ngupanddown
screami
ngyes!It
ookabreat
herthencal
med
downIdidashortpray
ert
othanktheAlmi
ght
y
above.
Iwouldn'tbeherewithouthim,Iwenttobrush
myt eeththenrushedtoBandil
e'sroom.I
bargedintotheroom withoutt
hinkingtwi
ceof
knocking,Bandil
ewasawake.Hel ookedatme
whileyawning
Me:
Ij
ustgott
hebestnews!
Isai
dthatwi
thabi
gsmi
l
ewr
it
tenacr
ossmy
face
Bandil
e:Whi
chare?(Hedidn'
tsoundt
hat
exci
tedbutrat
hercold)
Me:Ouch!WellIgotaccept
edatt
hatschool
you
hadappli
edforme
Bandi
l
e:What
?!
Me:
Yes!
 
Bandi
l
e:Gi
vemeahug
Ij
umpedont
opofmeandwasl
eav
ingki
sses
onbot
hmycheeks
Bandi
l
e:Congr
atul
ati
onsmnt
asebutI
'
m st
il
l
madthatyouwereinmyst
udy
Me:
I'
m sor
rybr
oIdi
dmeant
o
Bandi
l
e:Whatdi
dyousee?
HowwasIgoi
ngt
ohi
m Isawdad'
swi
l
l?
Bandi
l
e:Tel
lmet
het
rut
hpl
ease?
Me:
Isawdaddy
'swi
l
landIr
eadt
hroughi
t
Bandi
le:
Okaybutyouwi
l
lbepuni
shedf
orgoi
ng
thr
oughmystuff
Me:
Iwon'
tfi
ghti
tcauseIknowi
twaswr
ong
Bandi
l
e:Wher
eyougoi
ngt
ofi
ghtagai
nsti
t?
Me:
YesdawgIwas
Bandi
e:Nowy
ouar
ecal
l
ingmedawg?
Hewaslet
ti
ngoutchuckl
esandhespankedmy
l
eftar
m 
Me:Letmegoandt
akeashowert
henpr
epar
e
br
eakfast
Bandi
l
e:Goodgi
rlal
readyser
vingy
ourpuni
sh
IchuckledbecauseIknewhewasj ustmocki
ng
me, soIwentt omyroom str
aighttothe
bathroom andtookashower.Idr i
edthen
l
otionedIwor emyblackt
ightsandabaseball
shi
rtwi t
hsli
ppersonmyf eet
,Ifixedmyhair
i
ntoapony t
ailf
orm.
 
Li
zzysentmeane-mail
ofconfi
rmati
on,Iwoul
d
saymydaystar
tedata200%rateoutof100%.
SoImademybedt henopenedthedoorl
eadi
ng
tot
hebal
conyandIstoodther
e,whowould
hav
eevert
houghtIwouldbeoutofthe
si
tuat
ionIwasi
n? 
Aft
ert
hatpri
v at
esoulcl
eansi
ngcer
emonyI
gavemysel
f,Iwentdownstai
rs.
Ipreparedbreakfastf orBandil
eandIwhocame
downwear ingkaki shor t
swi t
hablueandwhite
stri
ppedmuscul arv estandf l
opsonhisfeet
thenstoodbehindt heki tchencount
er.
 
Bandi
l
e:Di
shupmnt aseI'
m hungr
yandpl
ease
mayIhaveyourphone?
Il
ookedathi
m wi
thasmi
rkonmyf
ace
Me:
Because?Whyshoul
dIgi
vei
ttoy
ou?
Bandi
l
e:Youar
ebei
ngpuni
shed-
Me:Forent
eri
ngmystudywi
thoutmyappr
oval
!
Ial
readyknowthedr
il
lbr
a
Bandi
l
e:CanIhav
eit
?
Me:
Fine
Il
if
teduptheshir
tandtookoutthephone
handi
ngitoutt
ohishands,Idi
shedupforthe
bot
hofusthenweat
e.Heof
feredtowashthe
di
sheswhi
l
stIwascl
eani
ngaroundthef
lat
. 
Aknockcamethr
ought
hedoorsoIqui
ckl
y
wentt
oanswerit
. 
Thisbeautif
ull
adywit
haweaveonwearing
Niketracksui
tpant
swithaNi
ket
-shi
rtand
tekki
es. 
Me:
Hel
l
osi
si,
canIhel
pyou?
Lady
:Hel
pmewi
thwhat
?Wher
eismyman?
Sheshov
edherbodyi
ntot
hedoorpushi
ngme
wit
hherarm away
Me:
Whoar
eyoul
ooki
ngf
or?
Lady
:Wher
eismyman?Ar
eyouhi
sgi
rl
fr
iend?
Shethrewherhandbagont hesofaandcar
keysthencamet owardsme!Thi sladylooked
l
ikeshewasr eadytofight,
Iwasscar edto
deaththatIwasgoi ngt obebeatenor
something!Ionlyhadoneopt i
onleftj
usttocall
outBandile'
sname
Me:
Bandi
l
e!!Cr
azywomani
nli
vi
ngr
oom!

.
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t13
Voi
ce:
Khazi
mlano!
!That
'smysi
ster
!
OhshewasKhazi
mla,
 
Khazi
mla:
What
?She'
syourwhat
?
Me:
I'
m Bandi
l
e'sl
i
ttl
esi
ster
Khazi
mla:
DearI
'm sosor
ryfordoi
ngt
hatt
oyou,
Idi
dn'
tknowthatyouwerehis-
Me:
It
'sokaysi
siKhazi
mla 
Ipul
l
edherf orahugshewasreall
y
embarassedyoucoul
dtel
lfr
om thewayshe
wastalki
ngtome
Khamzi
l
a:LetmegoI
'
m sor
rybaby
Me:
Okayby
esi
si
ShekissedBandil
e'
sbutt
om l
ipsandwentout
thedoorIwatchedherl
eavebefor
econf
ront
ing
mybrother
Me:
Whatdi
dyoudot
oher
? 
Bandi
l
e:Pl
easespeaki
nful
lsent
encesnot
ter
ms
Thosearewhathewoul
dsayt
ogetoutofa
si
tuat
ionhewasin
Me:
Youexact
lyknowwhatI
'
m say
ing
Bandil
e:Shecaughtmewi
thanumberofgi
rl
s
naked 
Myjawwasonthefl
oorIf
inal
l
yunder
stood
whyshebecamenut
swhenshesawme
Me:Youdidwhat
?Thatwomanlov
esyoubut
rubthati
nherf
ace?Bray
oushoul
dbe
ashamedofyoursel
f
Bandi
l
e:Iwasj
ustf
eedi
ngmymai
nsi
s,shej
ust
becomesf
rust
atedwhenIt
alkaboutdoi
ngt
he
deed
Howst
upi
dcanmybr
otherbe?
 
Me:Sothatmatt
ers"
feedi
ngy
ourmai
n"y
ouar
e
somethi
ngelse!
 
Hedidn'
tut
terawor
doutofhi
smout
hand
bur
iedhi
sheadinhi
shands
Me:Can'
tyouseeshel ov
esy ou?Imeanshe
sti
ckswit
hyouthroughthickandthi
n!I
fyou
weremymanIwoul dhav edumpedy ouages
agobutsheisshowingherlovebutyoudon'
t
seem t
ounderst
andt hat
Herai
sedhisheadandl
ookedatmewi
tha
conf
usedface
Bandil
e:Shoul
dn'
titbemegi
vingyouadv
ice
i
nsteadofy ougi
vi
ngmeadvice?
Ir
oll
edmyeyesandmov
edbackwar
dst
orest
mybackont
hesofa
Me:
What
everBandi
l
ebuty
ouwi
l
lneedi
tone
dayIcr
ossmyhear
tandhopet
odi
e!
Bandi
le:
Itooky
ouradv
iceOpr
ahwhywoul
dn'
tI
takei
t?
Islappedhisar
m wi
thf
ull
for
cemaki
ngsur
ehe
feelsthepai
n
Bandi
l
e:ButIt
ooky
ouradv
iceOpr
ah-
to-
be 
Hewaslaughi
nghi
sheadoffaf
tercal
l
ingme
Opr
ahandIwasalsol
aughi
ng 
Me:
Let
'
sgopr
epar
esupper
Bandi
l
e:Whatar
ewemaki
ng?
Me:
Lasagnewoul
dbeokay
Henoddedthenwewenttothekitchen
pr
epar
ingsupperfort
hebothofus,aft
ereat
ing
wewashedthedishesandwenttowatchWhy
Di
dIGetMar r
iedII
? 
Itwasaromancemov iewhi
chIseemedt
o
enjoy
,eventhoughyouwoul
dshedsometear
s
hereandtherewhil
emunchi
ngdownon
popcor
ns,
ice-
cream andsomef
izzydr
inks.
Soaf t
erthatsobersmoreespecial
lycoming
from me,wewentt osleep.Bandi
lewasquiteI
thinkitwasthelect
uresIgavetohim,Icoul
dn'
t
l
ethi m ki
l
laperson'ssoulwholoveshimto
deathdown
Me:
Goodni
ghtbr
oandmakey
oucal
lKhazi
mla
Bandi
l
e:Ni
ghtsi
sandIwi
l
lhaha
Me:
Hahaokaygood
Wewentt oourseperateroomsandIgoti nt
o
minethenchangedintomyni ghti
esthenputon
myflowereddoek.Ituckedintobedwhil
e
l
ist
eningtoCharl
iXCXxBoom Cl ap,
itan
amazingsong.SoIsleptafterawhil
e.

*
***
***
**
2weekspassed
School
swer
enowopenandIwasnowan
offi
calGrade11pupi lsoontobeaMat ri
culat
e.
Iwokeupar ound05:30thenqui ckl
yfi
xmybed,
Itookashower .Iworemywhi teshir
twithmy
cunicwhi chbluewithmywhi tesocksand
Grasshopper .Ifi
xedmyhairintoabunt hen
tookmyschool bagandputmyphonei nmy
pocket.Iwentdownst air
sandt ookpancakes
onthepl atethensqueezedthehoneysy rupon
them,Ipour edcoffeeint
othecup.  
Bandi
l
ecamewear
inghi
scapbutt
heot
herway
ar
ound
Bandi
l
e:Readyt
ogo?
Inoddedwhi l
egulpi
ngdownt hecoff
eewit
hthe
pancake.Itookmyschoolbagthenfoll
owed
behi
ndBandi let
ohisGolf7,
hedr ov
eoutthe
apart
ment s.Mybrot
herdrovetomyschooland
handedov erR50notet
ome
Me:
Thanks
Bandi
l
e:Lear
nyourbooksnotboy
s
Me:
Iwi
l
l
Bandi
l
e:Goodseey
oul
ater
HekissedmyforeheadthenIgotoff.St
art
inga
newschoolwasnerve-r
ecking,
Iknewnooneso
i
twouldbereal
lyhardtomakef ri
endsbut
any
way sIwoul
dmakef r
iends.
 
Goi
ngint
ot heschoolgr
oundsIsuddenlyf
eltas
i
fIwasgoingpsychopathi
citwasreal
lybi
g. 
Ist
artedwal
kingaroundInot
icedsomeone
l
ookingatmeandI '
m sur
etheyweretry
ingto
thi
nksheknowsmef r
om.Thisgir
lcamecloser
anditwasThandazwa
Me:
Thandi
?
Isai
dthatwi
thasmi
l
ewr
it
tenal
lov
ermyf
ace
Thandazwa:
Sizi
? 
OhmyGodIdi
dn'
tthi
nkI
wouldseeyouhere
Me:
Alsodi
d 
Anot
hergi
rlappr
oacheduswhoseemedt
obe
Thandazwa'
sfr
iend
Gi
rl
:Andwhoi
sthi
s?
Sheseemedasami
ddleclass,
upt
ightbi
tch
(excusemef
ort
hel
anguage).
Thandazwa:
Thi
sisSizi
phi
weLonokoImether
atSteer
s,2weeksago
Gir
l:
OhI '
m Amangal
eXi
po,
Thandazwa'
sbest
bestfr
iend!
Thandazwa:
That
'
swasi
nappr
opr
iat
e 
Wasshetry
ingt
orubt
hati
nmyf
ace?Whata
t
ypi
calgi
rl
!!
!
•
•
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t14
Thef
ir
stdayofschool
ispr
ett
ymucht
hef
ir
st
dayofschool ,somewoul dsay,"
Mydaywas
amazi ng"whil
esomesay ,
"Worstdayofmyl if
e".
Iwoul dsaymi nedi
dn'tfal
lunderthose.Itwas
j
ustunexpl ai
nableImeanIf i
tt
edinwel l
withthe
rightpeopleofcourse.Sothebellrangandt hat
meanti twastimef orl
unchbreaksot he
teacherdismissedus,Ifol
lowedbehi ndan
Indiangirl
namedSamor aPravi
shwhowasal so
af reshmanatschool l
ikeme. 
IsawAmangel eandThandazwastandingwith
twoguy st
hatIdidn'
tknowbythetuckshopsoI
mademywayt othem.Wewer enotdoingthe
samesubjects,t
heseguysstoppedtal
kingand
focusedonme
Thandazwa:
Don'
t 
youev
ent
hinkofher
! 
Guy1:
Damnsheissohot
!Kay
peewi
l
lbe
sat
isf
iedwi
tht
hisone
Amangel
e:I
'
mtheonewhoi
ssupposet
osat
isf
y
hi
m 
Thef
ir
stguymadea"
Mmh"soundt
oAmangel
e
Guy2:Sorudeofusnott
ointr
oduceour
sel
ves,
I'
m Luthoandthi
sismyniggaOlwet
huandyou
are?
Me:
Sizi
phi
weLonoko
Luthoshookhisheadokayt henanot herguy
approachedus,IknowIwasn' tsupposeto
droolorevenstareataguy.Butt hi
swas
temptationinf
rontofme,theguywaswel l-
bui
l
t,
l
ightskinned,t
all
andabrush- cut
!Itri
edsohard
nottolookbutnoIkeptstaring. 
Amangelemadeherwayt ot hi
sguy,makingher
bodyhughis.Shout
ing"
Kay pee",
doy outhi
nk
theguycared?Nopehejustsmiledandmade
hiswaywher eOl
wethu,
Thandazwa, LuthoandI
werestandi
ng. 
Ol
wet
hu:
Njay
eGame(
Dogoft
hegame)
Theybumpedf
ist
sthet
hreeoft
hem
Guy
:Yi
zof
ethu(
That
'si
tbr
a)Thandi
myf
ri
end
Thandazwa:
Bestpl
ayerofal
lti
mes!
Guy
:Youknowmyf
ri
end
Theyl
aughedandhepl
acedhiseyesonmy
bodywhi
lescanni
ngf
rom headt
ot oes
Guy
:I
'm Khany
isoPi
l
ayandy
ouar
e?
Hepul
ledouthi
shandf
orahandshakewi
tha
smi
lewri
tt
enuponhisf
ace
Me:
Sizi
phi
weLonoko 
Ishakedhi
shandlooki
ngstrai
ghtint
ohi sey
es
whichwerespar
kli
ngormay bei
twasmewi th
mymi ndoccupi
edbyhischarmingvoiceand
eyes.
 
Amangel
e:Kay
pee 
canIt
alkt
oyou?
That'
swhenInot i
cedoureyesandhandshad
l
ockedtogetherforacoupl
eofminutes,
Khanyi
soclearedhist
hroatandweseperat
ed
ourhands
Khany
iso:
Okay
,seey
'al
ll
ater
Thandazwa:
Sur
e 
Ididn'tanswerfr
om theembar r
assmentthat
j
usthappened, soThandazwaandIwentt obuy
2st eakandkidneypieswithLaysandtwo
Fant aOrangedri
nks.Sowewentt ositunder
thet r
eeonabenchwhi chcreat
edacool,shady
area.Wesatandst artedeati
ng
Thandazwa:
Sizi
wil
lyoupr
omi
semeonet
hing?
Me:
Yes 
Thandazwa:Pleasedon'
tfal
lforKhany
isothat
guycanturnfriendsi
ntoenemiesandcause
manyheartbreaks
Me:
I'
m notev
eni
nter
est
edathi
m
WhowasIf
ool
ingbecauseIwasr
eal
l
y
i
nter
est
edi
nhi
m
Thandazwa:Aweekdoesn'
tendwi
thoutaf
ight
abouthim ev
enAmangelewaspar
tofit
Icl
appedmyhandst oget
her
,thi
sKhanyisowas
arealpl
ayerbutgi
rl
scanbeweirdsometimes
howcanwef ightf
orguyswhowill
justmessus
upandl
eav
eushangi
ng?
Sothebel
lrangtogobackt oourcl
asses,
Thandi
andIwentt ooursepar
ateclasseswi
th
ahugfrom herkeepi
ngmehappy .
 
Iwentt omyAccountingcl
assIsatatthetabl
e
nexttot hedoor,
Khanyi
soandhisfri
ends
enteredIknewt r
oubl
ewascomi nguponme.
Theyst oppedinfr
ontofmeandKhany i
sowas
stari
ngbutt hi
sguyli
kestost
are. 
Me:
CanIhel
pyou?
Isnappedmyhandsi
nfrontofKhany
iso'
sface
whof i
nal
lyr
evi
vedi
ntot
hesensesofthisEart
h
Khany
iso:
That'
s 
myplacey
ouar
esi
tt
ingi
n,my
nameiscavedonit
Hepoi
ntedatt
hebackofthechai
randt
hehi
s
namewasingoldandsi
l
ver 
Me:
I'
m sor
ryIdi
dn'
tcheck 
Khany
iso:
It
'sokaybuty
oucansi
tbehi
ndme
Me:
Okay
 
Ist oodupt henwentf ormyt extbookal sodi
d
Khany isoourf inger stouchedonceagai nour
ey eslocked.Ol wet huandLut hocl earedt hey
throatsandsmi l
ingont heside, Iseper ated
from hi mt hensatt wot abl
esawayf rom him.
Somet hingswer eget t
ingabi tawkwar dwith
Khany isoImeant hewaywewoul dl ookateach
otherandt hephy sical contacthappeni ng!The
l
essonst ar
tedandIwasconcent ractingI
wasn' tthinkinganyf unnybusi nessesj ustmy
school work. 
Thelessonendedandi twashome- t
ime.Iwent
outofcl asswiththeot
herst
udent stal
ki
ngwith
them, Thandazwawaswaut i
ngf ormebyt he
school gateandIwenttoher.It
oldher
everyt
hingaboutwhathappenedandshewasa
bitpuzzled.Bandil
ecametofetchmef rom
school soIhuggedThandazwaandwentt o
Bandile'
scarplacingmybagint hebackseat
andIcl i
mbedi n. 
Bandi
l
e:Howwasy
ourf
ir
stday
?
Me:
ItwasgoodIf
it
tedi
nwi
tht
heot
herki
ds
Bandi
l
e:That
'sgoodnowl
et'
sgohome
Inoddedt henhedr ov eofftohi sapartmenti
n
Seapoint,hepar kedthecar .Thenwewentt o
hi
sf l
at,Icouldsmel ldiv
inef oodmadecomi ng
fr
om theki tchen.Iwentt omyr oom and
changedi ntomycasual clothesthendidmy
homewor k.Iwentt oeatt hef oodwaspr epared
byBandi l
eaf tereat
ingIbecamedr owsyand
wenttosl eep. 
.
..
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t15
Iwokeupt henstart
edthequestt
of i
ndmy
phoneundermypi ll
ow,If
ounditthenchecked
theti
mei twas01:45.Mystomachwas
grumbli
ngont heothersi
de,soIworemy
sl
i
pper
sleav
ingmysi
de-
lampon.
 
Imademywayt ot hekit
chenr ushi
ngdownt he
stai
rs,Imademy selfacheesesandwhi chand
pouredsomej ui
cef ormyselfthenstar
ted
eati
ng.Iri
nsemydi shesandwentbackt omy
room Ichangedintomyshor tpyjamasthenput
onadoekt ocov ermyhai r.Ituckedint
obed
andsleptagain.

*
**

"
TRRR"TRRR"TRRR"
Myannoy i
ngalarm starti
ngmakenoi senextto
meIqui cklyswitcheditoff.Isatuponmy
butt
ockst henrubbedmyey estoget
hertogeta
cl
earvisionwhiley awningforacoupleofti
mes.
Icl
imbedoutofmybedt henwentt otakea
shower,Idriedthenloti
onedandwor emywhi t
e
shi
rt,
shor tti
ghtsandsocksIf i
xedmybed.  
Iwentdownst
air
st omakemyl unchIdidn'
t
wanttobuyfr
om thetuckshop,
Bandil
ecame
downandheseemedt ohav ewokenupont he
ri
ghtsi
deofbedIguess. 
Bandi
l
e:GoodMor
ningl
i
lone
Me:Mor
ningbhut
isomeoneseemst
obei
na
goodmood! 
Isai
dthatwi
thasmi
l
ewr
it
tenonmyf
ace
Bandi
le:
Whowoul dn'
tbe?Onthi
sglor
iousday
wit
hthebir
dschirpi
ngonyourwindowandthe
sunbri
ghtout
side. 
Me:
Okayl
etmegoandpr
epar
etogot
oschool
Bandi
l
e:AlsomustI
,ohSiziyoumusttakeacab
thi
saft
ernoonIhav
eclassesthi
saft
ernoon
Iwasabi
tdi
sappoi
ntedbecauseIdi
dn'
tl
iket
o
uset
axi
sbutIhadt
onomat terwhat
Me:
Okayi
t'
scool
Bandi
l
e:Goandweary
ouruni
for
m
Me:
Onmyway
Iwentupst airstowearmycuni cand
Grasshopper ,Imadeaneatbunandspr ayed
myhai ralsobr ushingit.SoIt ookmyAdi das
bagpackt henwentt ot hekitchenIputmy
l
unchboxi nitandmademy selfCornFlakes,I
wentt owat chRegul arShow.Iat ethenwentt o
placethedi shinthesi nkitwasal r
eady07: 05
soIwentt othepar kingsandBandi l
ewas
alreadyinthecar .Iwenti ntothecart henhe
drov et
omyschool ,hestoppedi nfr
ontoft he
school groundsandBandi l
ehandedmeR200
not e
Bandi
l
e:St
udybooksnot
?
Me:
Boy
s
Bandi
l
e:Goodgi
rlIwi
l
lseey
oul
aterathome,
I
l
oveyousis
Me:
Il
ovey
out
oobr
o 
Iwentoutoft
hecarwi
thmybagandent
ered
theschoolgrounds,
Iwaswai t
ingfor
Thandazwabyt hegatebecauseshehadn't
arr
ived.Ii
nsert
edtheearpl
ugsandl i
stenedto
mymusi c,someonecoveredmyey eswi t
hthei
r
hands
Voi
ce:
Pick-
A-Boo!
Thev oi
cewassoundi
ngf
ami
l
iarbutIcoul
dn'
t
rel
ateitt
owho 
Me:
Whoar
eyou?
Iwasfeel
i
ngt
hei
rhandswi
thmyf
inger
sbut
not
hing
Voi
ce:
Okayl
etmegi
vey
ouacl
ue,
K-H
Theper
sonwaswhisperi
ngnextt
omyear
sof
tl
ywhichgotmefasci
nat
ed
Me:
Khany
iso?
Voi
ce:
Yept
hat
'sme 
Heremovedhi
shandsf
rom myey
esandI
t
urnedar
oundtof
acehi
m
Me:
Oht
hePi
ck-
A-Booguy
?
Khany
iso:
Yeswhoar
eyouwai
ti
ngf
or?
Me:
Thandazwaandy
ou?
Khanyi
so:NooneIjustsawy
oustandi
ngal
one
soIthoughtIshoul
dcomeandkeepyou
company
Me:
Oht
hat
'sni
cebutnot
hanks 
If
ini
shedmysent
encewi
thasmi
l
e 
Khany
iso:
Ouch!(
Het
ouchedhi
slef
tsi
dewhi
ch
washishear
t)
Me:
Butr
eal
l
ynot
hanks
Khanyi
so:
Oh!Ij
ustcamewi
thl
ovel
ycompany
toyou
Me:
Khany
isowi
l
lyoul
eav
emeal
one?
Khany
iso:
Okayj
ustdi
aly
ourdi
git
s
Hetookouthi
scel
l
phoneandsmi
l
edt
othe
si
de
Me:
071f
orgeti
t
Iplacedmyearphonesbackt
omyear
sandhe
tookthem of
fandmadeasmi rk.
Khany
iso:
Iwi
l
lgeti
t
Me:
Iwi
l
lli
ket
oseey
out
ry,
suchapoorsoul
Khany
iso:
Ilov
eyouwheny
ousayt
hat
Ij
ustl
etachuckl
eandThandazwaappr
oached
methenwehugged
Thandazwa:
Andhi
m?
It
oldherever
ythi
ngt
hatj
usthappenedandshe
waslaughi
ng
Thandazwa:That
'
shi
m hewon'
tst
opwhenhei
s
aft
eragirl
Me:Hemustst
opbecauseI
'
m noti
nter
est
edi
n
hi
m
Thandazwa:
Ohmyf
ri
end!
Shewashav i
ngtheti
meofherli
feImeanshe
waslaughi
ngherheadof
f.Thandazwawasa
gi
rlwhowasn'
tqui
cktojudgeshewasav
ery
bubbl
e,l
ovi
ngandconf
identper
son.
 
Sothebellrangandwewentt oourclassat
l
eastwewer ei
nthesameclass.Thedaywent
byfastInoti
ceditwashome-ti
meIwasal so
confusedbecausewejustgotint
oclassand
nowi twashometimebutanywaysitwasquite
good. 
Sowewentoutofourschool grounds,
Amangelewasabsentf r
om schoolonl
yGod
knowswhy !ThandazwaandIstrol
leddownt
o
thebusstop 
Thandazwa:
Whydon'
twegot
oCent
uryCi
ty?
Ir
eal
lywantedt
ogot
her
eIwasr
eal
l
yexci
ted
soIj
ustanswer
ed
Me:
YesIal
way
slongedt
ogot
oCent
uryCi
ty
Thandazwa:
Let
's 
cat
chat
axi
 
Wetookataxi
toCent
uryIwassoexci
tedand
t
hri
l
ledatt
hesametime,t
hemallwasverybi
g
l
ikeenor
mous.Soweboughtsomemi lkshakes
anddidsomewindowshoppi
ngbecausewe
werenotal
lowedtoent
erwear
inguni
form butI
don'
tknowwhy .
 
Weal
soboughtsomet
akeaway
sthenat
e, 
Me:
Whydi
dn'
tAmacomet
oschool
?
Thandazwa:
Shesai
dshewasn'
tfeel
i
ngwel
land
deci
dednottocome
Me:
Iwonderwhat
'
smadehersi
ck
Weconti
nuedeatingandthenf
ini
shedwewer
e
goi
ngtotakeseperat
ecabs
Thandazwa:
Iwi
l
lseey
out
omor
row 
Me:
Seey
ou
West oodupt henwehuggedandwentt oour
seper
atecabs, Idi
rectedthedri
vertomy
apart
mentt henIpaid.Igotofft
henwentt othe
apart
mentunl ockedthedoorandt hengotin,I
l
ockedt hedoorbehindme.  
Iwenttomyr oom thenchangedi nt
omyshor t
s
andaplai
nblackshi r
twi thf
li
pfl
ops, Ihadno
homeworksoIt hrewmy sel
fonthecouchand
watchedsomet elevi
sion.Aft
erawhilethere
wasaknockont hedoorandIwentt oansweri t,
Iopenedthedoor .
 
No!No!NoI
tcoul
dn'
tbenothi
m! 
Howdidhefi
ndme?I sheheretomoscul
ate
meagain?Am Idr
eamingorhasreal
i
tyst
ruck
agai
n? 
.
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t16
Whati
shedoi
ngher
e?Howdi
dhef
indme?
 
I
twasDumani thest
epfat
herwhousedto
mosculat
eme, hedi
dn'
tevencar
eift
hatmay
breakdownmysoulbutknewhewast hi
nki
ng
ofsati
sfy
inghi
mself
. 
Dumani wasn'tt
hatchubbyheusedt
obe, he
seemedasahomel essHobo.Hewaslooking
scruf
fy,
curleddir
tyhai
randwascarr
yinga
Shopri
tegrocerybag.
Ti
mej ustf
rozenothi
ngmadesense,
Ist
art
ed
wonderi
nghowdi dhefi
ndme? 
Dumani
:
Sizi
phi
wear
eyoust
il
lher
e?
Ij
umpedupal
i
ttl
ebecauseofshock
Me:Whatdoyouwanther
e?GoIdon'
twantt
o
seeyourpat
het
icf
ace!
It
ri
edpushi
nghi
m outthedoorbuthewasv
ery
st
rongsoIdi
dn'
tsuceedi
nthat
Dumani
:
Pleasel
etmeexpl
ainwhyI
'
m her
e
Me:
5secondsst
art
snow
Hebreathedoutabi
tthenl
ookedatmewi
th
sor
ryeyes
Dumani
:
Icameall
ther
ewayher
etot
ellyout
hat
Ir
egr
etever
ysi
ngl
eminut
eIl
aidmyhandson
you.I
'm beingpuni
shedf
ormysi nsIlostmy
every
thi
ngbecauseofmydoi ngsthatIdid
thi
ngstoy ouandyoursi
ster
Me:Thatser
vesyourightI
'
m sohappythaty
ou
getti
ngpuni
shed,di
dy out
hinkIenj
oyedbei
ng
touchedbyamanwhoIdon' tevenknowbutI
onlyknowthei
rname?
Tearswereal
readyfl
ushingoutofmyeyes
becauseofmymemor ycomingback.Hecame
cl
osertohughim Ipushedhim awayandhefel
l
onthedoorst
ep. 
IpushedDumani withmyar msandi mmediatl
y
closedt hedoorthenl ockedi t
.Isl
ideddownt he
doorwi thtearsstreamingout .Icr
ouchedmy
bodywi t
hmyl egsandr ockedmy selfbackand
fourth,Dumani keptknocki ngonthedoorf or
several t
imesandf i
nall
ygav eupbecauseI
wasn' topening.
 
Deepwoundswer
eonceagai
nuncovered,
all
t
hememor i
eswer
ecomingback.Ist
oodup
from thef
loorandwenttolayonthecar
peti
n
theli
vingroom.Islowlyt
ookdeepbreat
hest
o
calm downt henf
inal
lyst
opped.
Iheardthedooropenandfootst
epsleadi
ng
i
ntothelivi
ngroom,Ir
aisedupmyheadt osee
thepersonanditwasBandil
e.Hequickl
y
kneeledinfr
ontofmeandwr appedhisar
ms
aroundmyneck
Bandi
l
e:Whathappened?
 
Icover
edmyf
acewi
thmyhandsanddi
dn'
t
answerhi
m
Bandi
le:
Sizi
phi
wetalk!Iwon'
tbeabl
etohel
pif
youdon'
tsayanyt
hing
Me:Hecameandtol
dmehe'
ssor
ry,
her
egr
ets
ev
erysecondhet
ouchedme
Bandi
l
e:Whi
chbast
ardi
stha-Dumani
shi
t!
 
Inoddedandhewasv
eryf
uri
ous
Bandi
l
e:Di
dhet
ouchy
ouorany
thi
ng?
Me:Nopehewant
edt
ohugbutIpushedhi
m
away
Bandi
l
e:Good,
ever
ythi
ngi
sgoi
ngt
obef
ineI
promi
seyou 
Heki
ssedmyf
oreheadandhel
pedmeup 
Bandi
l
e:Let
'sgoandt
akesomepai
nki
l
ler
sto
cur
etheheadache
Me:
Okay
It
'slikeheknewmyheadwaspoundi ngand
spinningaround.Wewentt othekitchenandhe
tookoutt wopill
sandgav ethem t
omewi t
ha
glassofwat er
.Idrankthem thenupandgulped
thewat erdown.Hehadbr oughtpizzaand
somebr aaimeat,Bandi
ledi
shedupf orthr
ee
plates
Me:
Thet
hir
done?Ai
n'
twet
wo?
Hestar
tedsmi
li
ngandlookedont
hesi
desoI
coul
dn'
tbeabl
etoseehim
Bandi
l
e:Wewi
l
lbehav
ingav
isi
tor
Hest
art
edt
ogl
owaf
tersay
ingt
hat
Me:
Iwonderwho?Butt
imewi
l
ltel
l
Bandi
l
e:Yepnowl
et'
sgoeat
Hetookt heplateswhil
eItookthedri
nkcans
andglasses,wewat chedsomet el
evi
sionwhi
le
eat
ing.Afterawhi l
eIburpedbecauseIwasful
l,
aknockcamet hroughthedoor
Bandi
l
e:Iwi
l
lgeti
t
Me:
Okay
 
HerushedtothedoorandIcoll
ectedthedi
shes
andwenttoputthem i
nthekit
chensinkand
star
tedwashi
ngthem.Giggl
eswer ecoming
fr
om thel
ivi
ngroom l
eadi
ngtot hekit
cheni
t
wasKhazimlaandBandil
eholdi
nghandswhi l
e
Bandil
ewaswalkingbehi
ndher. 
Khazi
mla:
HeySi
zi
Me:
Hel
l
osi
si 
Khazi
mla:
Howar
eyou?
 
Me:
I'
mfi
net
hanksandy
ou?
Khazi
mla:
I'
m al
sof
ine
SheseemedlikeagenerousladywhoIwould
l
iketoseeasmysi st
er-
in-
lawoneday,I
'
mj ust
j
oking(l
aughi
ng).
 
If
ini
shedwashi
ngt
hedi
shest
henpackedt
hem
Me:
Bhut
iI'
m goi
ngt
omyr
oom 
Bandi
l
e:Okayandpl
easesl
eepwhi
l
eyouati
t
HewinkedandsmiledIjustchuckl
ebecauseI
knewhewantedtogeti nt
obusinesswi
thhis
chi
ckandIcoul
dn'tstandinthei
rway
Me:
Iwi
l
lsl
eepdon'
twor
ry
Bandi
l
e:Ni
ght
Me:
Night
Khazi
mla:
Sleept
ightanddon'
tl
ett
hebedbugs
bi
te
Me:
hahaIwon'
t 
Iwentt omyr oom andchangedint
omy
pyjamast hentuckedi
ntobed,Iwason
What sAppchattingt
oThandazwaabout
random things.
Ievenforgotthet
roubl
eswhi
chhappenedon
thatday,
IwentoutofWhatsAppandsleptwi
th
peacerunningthr
oughmybody.
 
.
..
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t17
Iwokeupt henextdaywit
hmyal ar
m making
thatannoyi
ngsound,soIswitcheditofft
hen
stret
ched.Icl
i
mbedoutofbedandwentt othe
bathroom t
orunabathwhilebrushingmyt eet
h,
Istri
ppedofft
henwentintothebatht ub.
 
AsIwasbathingIthoughtt
omy sel
fwhyshoul
d
Iholdgr
udgesevenifIknewthatDumanidi
d
hurtmeemotional
andment al
?Iwon'tbeabl
e
tofindi
nnerpeaceifIdon'
tforgi
veandforget
him.Ideci
dedtoputev er
ythi
ngthathappened
i
nt hepastaboutDumani t
houghhedoesn't
know.
If
eltthi
shugebar
gainslidedownmyshoul
der
s
l
eavingmedetoxi
cif
ied.Ineededt
ost
arta
cr
eateanewleafinmyl i
fe. 
I
twasaThur sdaysoIdri
ed,loti
onedandwor e
myuni f
orm withawhit
eshi r
t,socksand
Grasshopper.Il
etmyhairintoapony t
ail
then
quickl
yfi
xedmybed, Itookmybagpackand
wentdownstairs.
 
Iwaswel comedwi
thbr
eakf
astontopofthe
tabl
e,Khaziml
acameweari
ngBandil
e'
sshir
t
andboxer s
Khazi
mla:
Goodmor
ningdear
,howar
eyou?
Me:
I'
mfi
net
hanksandy
ou?
Khazi
mla:
I'
m okay
,youcandi
shupf
ory
our
sel
f
Me:
Thanks 
Ipl
acedbacon,
eggs,sausage,beefburgerand
sometoastt
henstar
tedeatingmyf ood,
Bandi
lecameandsatdown 
Bandi
l
e:Youar
egoi
ngt
ochoke!
Helookedatmeandshookhi
shead,
I
swall
owedthef
ood
Me:
Iwi
l
lnev
er
Bandil
e:Wewi
l
lseebyt
hewayhowar
eyou
feel
i
ng?
Me:Ifeel
free,
peacehasi
nvadedmysoul
I'
m
l
ightheart
ed 
Hesmi
l
edatmet
henhel
dmyl
efthand
Bandi
l
e:ThatgoodI
'
m happyt
oheart
hat
Ial
sosmiledthenrel
easedhishandfrom mine
andcont
inuedeati
ngmybr eakfast
,Khazi
mla
cameandsatwi t
husbr i
ngi
ngflapj
acksalong 
Me:
Bhut
ithi
sist
her
eal
MrsLonokot
obe
Bandi
l
enoddedandwassmi
l
ingatme
Khazi
mla:
Wewi
l
lseeaboutt
hati
fsomeone
agr
eestoit
SheglancedatBandi
l
eandpushedherl
i
ps
toget
her,
 
Bandi
l
e:Youwi
l
lbedear
 
Me:
Canal
sobr
ingbackhusband?
Mybrotherf
rownedhi
sfaceandl
ookedatme,
Khazi
mlawaslaughi
ng
Bandi
l
e:Ahay
ouwi
shsi
s?
Me:
Iwi
l
lbr
ingonebr
othery
ouwi
l
lsee
Bandi
l
e:Mhh!EatsoIcant
akey
out
oschool
Inoddedandat ethefl
apjacksIwentt othe
kit
chent oputmydishestot hekit
chen.Iwiped
myhandswi t
hat owelt
henwentt ot heli
vi
ng
room Itookmybagpackandst oodbyt he
tel
evisi
onstand.Bandi
lecameput t
ingonhis
capandIsai dgoodbyetoKhazi mlathen
fol
lowedBandi l
etotheelevator
 
Bandi
le:
Didyour
eal
l
ymeany
ouwant
edt
obr
ing
ahusband?
Me:
Iwasj
oki
ngbr
o
Bandi
l
e:GoodandIl
ovey
ouf
ort
hat
Me:
Lov
eyout
oo
Wehi gh-
fi
vedthengotoutoftheel
evatort
ohis
car.Hedroveoffoutoftheapar
tmentsand
drovetomyschool whichwasabout10
minutesdri
ve.HegavemeR200not eagain 
Me:
Byebhut
iseey
oul
ater
Bandi
l
e:Cheer
s 
Itookmybagandgotof fthecar,
Iwalkedinto
theschoolgr
oundsandpamphl et
swer egi
v en
out.Ir
ecei
vedonewhi chwassay ing"Pool
PartyOfTheYear"andor gani
sedbysome
Grade12students.If
oldediti
nhal ft
henmade
mywayt oThandazwawhowasl i
steni
ngtoher
musicwithherheadphones.Weshar edahug
andexchangedkissesonourcheeks 
Me:
Babes
Thandazwa:
Dearhowar
eyou?
Me:
I'
m awesomeandy
ou?
Thandazwa:I
'
mf enomi
nall
ove,di
dyouhear
aboutthepoolpar
tyonSat
urday?
Me:
Yesar
eyougoi
ngt
oit
?
Thandazwa:
Def
inat
elyandy
ou?
Me:
Ifmybr
otherappr
oves
Thandazwa:
That
'
sthepar
tyoft
hey
eari
nour
school
Me:Butwhydoy
oudoi
tont
hef
ir
stweekof
school
?
Thandazwa:
I'
m notsur
ebuti
t'
showwedoi
t
Me:
Oh?
Thandazwa:Yescanwetakesel
fi
esIal
way
s
wantedtotakethem wi
thyou
Me:
Please
Shet ookoutherphoneandst artedt aki
ng
pict
ur esdoi ngsimilarposesthatIl ear
n'tfrom
her.West oppedwhent hebellrangf orclasses
tostar t,stil
lAmangel ewasstil
labsent .
Rumour swer ealr
eadystart
ingy ouknowHi gh-
School kids,somewher esay i
ngshewas
sufferingf rom depressi
onandot herssaidshe
waspr egnant .
Youwouldnev erknowwhattobeli
evesowe
wenttoourseperatecl
assesanditwas
Account
ing.Theteacher(
MrGoldberg)
assi
gnedust odoanassignmentwithapar
tner
butnooneseemedt ocar
eunti
lhewaspair
ing
usup
Gol
dber
g:Si
zi
phi
weandKhany
iso
Me:
Wit
hwhosi
r?
Gol
dber
g:Khany
isoPi
l
ay
Me:
Okaysi
r
Iwant
edt
ochangewi
thsomeoneel
se,
I
coul
dn'
twi
thKhany
isosohecamet
osi
tnextt
o
me
Khany
iso:
Hey
 
Me:
Hi
Khany
iso:
Sowear
epar
tner
snow?
Me:
Iguessso
Hesmi
l
edf
aint
lyandsi
l
encef
il
ledourspace
Khany
iso:
Arey
ougoi
ngt
othepar
ty?
Me:
Thepool
par
ty?May
be
Khany
iso:
Please 
goi
t'
sgoi
ngt
obel
i
t
Me:
Iwi
l
lseeaboutt
hat
Khany
iso:
CanIpl
easehav
eyourdi
git
s?
Me:
AsIsai
d072-
Khany
iso:
For
get
 i
t 
Welaughedatthatandourey eslockedwit
hour
handscomingcloserandcloserunti
l t
heymade
contact
.Icl
ear
edmyt hr
oatandmov edmy
handsf
rom hi
s
Khany
iso:
Sor
ryaboutt
hat
Ist
rat
chedmyheadandl
ookedawaywi
th
embarr
asmentf
il
ledmyf
ace
Me:
It
'sokayl
et,
let
'sdot
hewor
k 
Khany
iso:
Okaybab-
Il
ookedathi
m wi
thaconf
usedf
aceandhej
ust
l
augh
Me:
Whatdi
dyousay
?
Khany
iso:
OkaySi
zit
hat
'swhatIsai
d
Me:
Okay(
Ichuckl
edal
i
ttl
ebi
t)
Wedi dourworkwhilesteali
ngglancestol
ook
ateachother.Whenwef ini
shedwewer e
chatt
ingtoeachother,
hewasar eall
ycoolguy
andverykindbutyouwoul dneverseethat
becauseheisaplayboy
Me:
Whydi
dyoubecomeapl
ayer
?
Khany
iso:
Idon'
tknowbutIknowt
hatIst
art
ed
i
nGr
ade6whengi
rlswer
est
art
ingt
ofal
lfor
met
heni
tal
lst
art
ed
Me:
Don'
tyout
hinky
oucanchange?
Khanyi
so:I
fIf
indapersonwhocanhel
pme
change,
whowi l
lbewithmeandlov
emefor
whoI'mthenIwouldchange
Hewasl
ooki
ngatmei
nanot
herwayandwas
smi
li
ngt
othesi
de 
Me:
Wow!Ihopey
ouf
indt
hatper
sonIr
eal
l
ydo
Khany
iso:
What
's 
i
fthatper
soni
syou?
What
?IsKhanyi
sooutofhi
smi
ndori
shi
slov
e
f
ormedri
vinghi
m cr
azy?
Il
etoutal
aughandl
ookedathi
m
Me:
Whywoul
ditbeme?
Khanyi
so:
It
'st
hatyouunder
standmeandIl
i
ke
agir
lwhoisli
kethat
Ij
uststar
edathim wi
thnowordstosayto
Khanyi
so.Ist
hisguyt
ell
ingouthi
shear
tor
want
stof
ool
mewi
thhi
ssweett
enderwor
ds?
.
I
sthi
sKhany
isowor
th-
tr
ust
ingori
shegoi
ngt
o
pl
aymyhear
t? 
.
Whatdoy out
hinkofKhany
iso?Wi
l
lheev
er
change?

Febr
uar
y4at4:
38pm 
· 
Publ
i
c
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t18
Mostoft heperiodsIspentthem wi
thKhanyiso,
i
twasqui t
egoodbecauseIwasf i
nall
y
understandinghist
ruepersonal
it
y.Thebellf
or
breakrangandIt ookmybagpackandexi ted
theclass,Iwenttothetuckshopcoint
anerand
boughtapepperst eakpie,500mlCoca-Col
a
Li
fewithsomeMaynardsandDorit
os.
ThandazwacamewhenIwasgoi ngtofi
nda
pl
acetoseatandal
soboughthersel
fthesame
i
temsasmi ne,
wewenttositunderanoaktr
ee
whichwasnexttot
hetenni
scourtsowesat
downandstart
edeati
ng
Me:Fri
endweshoul
dgoandseeAmangal
ethi
s
af
ternoon
Thandazwa:
YouknowIwasal
sot
hinki
ngt
hat
 
Me:I
tfeelswrongt
hatwear
enotbyherside
ev
ent houghsheandIar
est
il
lnott
hatti
ght
Thandazwa:Wewil
lgothi
saft
ernoon,
mgani(f
ri
end)t
ell
whathappenedbetweeny
ou
andKhanyisoi
nAccounti
ng?
Me:
Whatdoy
oumeanmgani
?
Iwantedtohearhersi
dest
orybecauseI
not
icedshehasmanysourcesaboutnews.
 
Thandazwa:
Ihearyouwerepai
reduptheny
ou
hel
dhandsandev enat
temptedtoki
ss
Ij
ustlaughedandl
aidonmyback,tear
swere
evencomingoutfr
om myeyesbecauseof
l
aughinghard.
 
Me:At
tempt
edt
oki
ss?(
Thel
aught
ercameback
agai
n)
Thandazwa:
That'
swhatIhear
dfr
om someof
yourcl
assmates
Me:Nothat
'sfal
se,
Iagreewedidhol
dhands
butnott
hekissi
ngpart
,nofr
iend
Thandazwa:
IthoughtIshoul
daskformysel
f
becauseIal
sodidn'
tbeli
evetheki
ssi
ng 
Me:Any
thi
ngyouhearaboutmepl
easecone
andaskmeokay
Thandazwa:
Yesf
ri
endIwi
l
l
Me:
Excel
l
ent
Wechat t
edforawhi
lethenwenttodisposethe
wrapperswehadfr
om ourlunchint
othebin,
thebel
lrangandwewenttot hesameclass.
Theteacherdi
dwantshewassupposet odo,I
wasconcent
rat
ingnof
unnybusi
ness.
Thedaywentbyf astandi twashomet ime,I
tookmybagpackandf ollowedt hest udentsout
oftheclassIsawKhany isost andingwi th
anothergirl
flirt
ing.It'
st ruewhent heysay" A
l
eopardnev erchangesi t'
sspot "hewasev en
goingundert hegi rl
'sskirtmay behewas
playi
ngwi t
hhert highs.ButIdi dn'tmi ndt hem
becauseIdon' thav eany thingagai nstKhany i
so
andIwon' tstickt othef actwher ehesai dhe
maychangebecauseofme.Li feist ooshor tto
besitt
ingaroundwai t
ingf orsomeonet o
changefory oui nsteady ouwi l
l best ucki nthe
samechapt erofy ourlifef oreverst i
llclaiming
youarewai ti
ngf orsomeonet ochange.
Thandazwacamet
omer
unni
ngandshewas
breat
hingl
oudl
y
Me:
Damnwhathappenedt
oyou?
Thandazwa:Ihav
ebeenscreami
ngouty
our
namebuty ounotanswer
ing
Me:
I'
m sor
ryf
ri
endal
othasbeengoi
ngoni
n
mymind
Thandazwa:
Mindt
oshar
eIdon'
ttoheary
ou
saythat
Me:Nopenot
hingt
hatser
iousbutt
hanksf
or
bei
ngconcer
ned 
Thandazwa:
Any
thi
ngf
ormybest
ie
Shepul
l
edoutasmi
l
eatme
Me:
Sowebest
iesnow?
Thandazwa:Duh!Noel
sebutyoumyf r
iend,we
arepartner
sincri
meeventhoughwewon' t
commi tone(Wegiggl
ed)andIlov
eyoumgani 
Me:
Ncoah!Il
ovey
out
oomgani
rest
(best
f
ri
end)
 
Wehuggedt henmadeourwayt otheschool
gateandIsawBandil
e'
scar.Idragged
Thandazwatogoandmeethi m event
hough
shedidn'
twant,wewentt
ohiswi ndowandI
knockedonit.Hej
umpedupabi tandshookhis
head
Bandi
l
e:Youf
ri
ght
nedme
Me:
Sor
ryany
way
sthi
sismyf
ri
endThandazwa
Mot
samai
Thandazwa:
Hel
l
o bhut
i
Bandi
l
e:Hel
l
oThandi
,howar
eyou?
Thandazwa:
I'
m goodt
hanksandy
ou?
Bandi
l
e:I
'
m al
sogood 
Thandazwawasabitner
voustot
alktoBandi
l
e
buti
t'
snatur
alt
hatwegetnerv
ousaround
peopl
ewearenotusedto
Me:
Bhuticanyoutakeustoaf
ri
end'
shousr
t
henaft
erthattot
hemal l
Bandi
l
e:Okayt
hat
'sf
inebutwhatdoy
ouwantat
themall
?
Il
ookedatThandazwawhot
appi
ngherhandon
hercuni
c
Me:
Uhm wear
egoi
ngt
ouhm 
Thandazwa:
Buyswi
mmingcostumesfora
part
ycominguponSat
urdayt
hatwil
lbeheldat
myhouse
Shewasagoodli
arwhowoukdneverknow
whenshei
slyi
ngortel
l
ingt
hetr
uth
Bandi
l
e:Whydi
dn'
tyousaysoSi
zi
phi
we?
Me:
Itsl
i
ppedoutofmymi
ndsoIf
orgett
oask
Bandi
l
e:Soi
t'
swhen?
Thandazwa:Sat
urdayni
ghtitwi
l
lstar
tatabout
thr
ee-t
hir
tyandendedaroundel
even
Bandi
l
e:Okayshewi
l
lcomenow
Myey esli
terall
ypoppedwhenhesaidthatbutI
knewIwaspl ayi
ngwithext
remel
yhot,
hotf i
re
becauseifBandi l
efi
ndsoutweli
edtohim hell
wil
lbreaklooseespecial
lyf
orme.
Me:Thanksbhuti
cany
out
akeust
oaf
ri
end'
s
houseplease?
Bandi
l
e:Sur
elet
'sgo 
Iopenedt hebackseatdoorf ormeand
Thandazwat oent er,Bandi l
estartedt heengi ne
Thandazwagav ehim di rect
ionstoAmangal e's
house.Whenwegott othehousei twas
magni f
icateitlookedl ikeapal acei nacer tai
n
kingdom, Thandi andIgotof fthecar .She
pressedsomet hingont hewal landt hegate
openedi nasl owpace, Amangel ewassi t
ti
ngby
theswimmi ngpool whichwasspar kli
ngblue.I
havenev erseensomet hingamazi ngthant hatI
didn'
tev enmi ndt hem Iwasj ustgazingmy
eyesaroundt hehouseandpi cturedmy sel
finit
oneday . 
Iwentbacktothegi
rl
swhower edri
nki
ngj
uice
andlaughi
ng,Amangal
ejustl
aidherey
eson
meandbackonThandi
Amangal
e:HeySi
zi
 
Me:
Hi 
Amangal
e:Her
eisy
ourj
uice
Shegav
emeagl
assandIt
ooki
tfr
om her
Me:
Thanks 
Westar
tedt
alki
ngaboutr andom st
uff
,
Amangel
ehadfinall
ytookmeasherf ri
end
whi
chwasquitenice 
Amangel
e:Guy
sIhav
etot
ell
yousomet
hing
Us:
What
?
Amangel e:RememberthatdayIwasabsent
from school?(Wenodded)mymom t ookmet o
thehospitalbecauseIwasfil
l
ingnauseousand
throwingup, wel
lIwasgivenabloodtestand,
and
Tear
swerealr
eadyst
art
ingt
ofor
ninherey
es
andshel
ookeddown
Thandazwa:
Nono!Ar
eyoupr
egnant
?
Me:
Arey
ou?
Shel
ookedandshookherheadupanddown 
Amangele:YesI
'
m 13weekspr
egnantandt
her
e
i
snoturningbacknow
.
.
TOBECONTI
NUED
•
•
Famil
ypleasehel
pmeher ehowismywr i
ti
ng?
I
sitbori
ng,exci
ti
ngori
sitjustl
acki
ng?
 
Pleasecommentoni
t,don'
tbeaf
rai
dto
tel
l!
 
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t19
IwantedtoaskAmangel ewhoi sthefat
herof
herchil
dbutIkeptholdi
ngmy selfbackunti
l
si
lencefi
ll
edourspaceandIkeptt raci
ngmy
eyesonThandazwat henbackatAmangel e'
s
bell
y
Me:
Doy
ouknowt
hef
ather
?
Amangel
e:It
hinki
t'
sOl
wethubutwealway
s
usedpr
otect
ionwhenwesleptt
oget
her
Ilookedatherwithaconfusedf
aceIdi
dn'
t
thinkthatsheandOlwet
huwouldbetoget
her
Thandazwa:
Khany
iso'
sfr
iend?
 
Amangel
e:Yeshi
m 
Thandazwa:
Real
lyf
ri
end?Olwet
hu?Coul
dn'
t
youthi
nkofanyguy?Ol
wethu
Amangel
e:What
's 
thatsupposet
omean?
 
Thandazwa:
Thaty
ousl
eptwi
thOl
wet
hu
Amangele:Whati
fIsleptwit
hhim?Isitbecause
youalwayshadacr ushonOlwethubuthe
nevershowedint
erestist
hatyourprobl
em?
Okay!Thi
ngswerenowget
ti
ngoutofhandand
Ihadtostopt
hisfeud
Me:
Woul
dyout
woj
ustshutup!
Amangel
e:Lookwho'
stal
ki
ng?
Thandazwa:
Leav
e Si
zi
phi
weoutoft
his
r
ememberIknowy
ourdar
ksecr
ett
haty
ou-
Me:Thandazwashutthehellup!I'
m sickofy ou
twobeingoneachothersthroats!Let'
sgo
bef
orey ousaysomethi
ngy ouwi l
lregretl
ater
on!
Thandazwa:
Sizi
phi
weshe-
Iputmyhandinf
rontofmyfacet
ost
op
Thandazwaf
rom speaki
ng
Me:
Let
'
sgoby
eAmangel
e
Ipul
ledThandazwaupt henwewentt
othecar
,
Bandil
estar
tedthecaranddrov
eofft
othe
mall
. 
Bandi
l
e:Iwi
lldr
opy
ouof
fI'
m needed
somewhere
Me:
Okaybhut
i
Hest
oppedi
nfr
ontoft
hemal
landgav
emea
cr
edi
tcar
d
Bandi
l
e:By
egi
rl
s
Us:
Bye
Wecl i
mbedoutt hecarandwenttoPick'
n'Pay
Clot
hing,welookedaroundandsawthe
swimmi ngcostumes.Itookabl
ackandwhite
pockerdotwhichwasat wopi
ece,
Thandazwa
tookaor angeandwhitecost
ume.Wepaidthen
wenttoeatatCassie'
s 
Thandazwa:
YouknowAmangel
epi
ssedmeof
f
Me:
Butf
ri
endhor
monesar
epl
ayi
ngwi
thher
Thandazwa:
Screw 
hor
monessheexact
lyknows
whyshesaidthatt
ome
Shewasv
erypi
ssedy
oucoul
dtel
lwi
thhert
one
Me:
Mgani
restpl
easef
orgi
veher
Myphonestar
tedri
ngi
ngandIdi
dn'
tknowt
he
numbersoIanswer
ed
Me:
Hel
l
o
Cal
l
er:
Itol
dyouIwoul
dgety
ournumber
!
Thev
oicesoundedasKhany
iso
Me:
Khanyiso?Howt
hef
reaki
n'waydi
dyouget
mydigi
ts?
!
Him:BabesIhav
egotconnect
ionsar
oundt
he
school
Me:Ipr
omi seyouIwil
lbl
ocky
ouf
rom r
ecei
vi
ng
anycontactfr
om you
Khany
isowasl
aughi
ngasi
fIsai
dsomet
hing
cr
azy
Hi
m:Wewil
lseeaboutt
hat
,hopet
oseey
ouat
t
hepar
ty
Me:
Sur
eby
eKhany
iso
Hi
m:Bye(hesoundeddi
sappoi
ntedI
'
m sur
ehe
want
edtochatwithme)
Wehungupatt hesameti
me,Thandazwawas
l
ooki
ngatmei ndisbel
i
efwhi
l
eItookasipin
myorangej
uice
Me:
What
? 
Thandazwa:
Phone 
cal
l
s?Mmhwewi
l
lsee
wher
ethi
sonet
akesy
ou
Me:
Whatdoy
oumeanexact
ly?
Thandazwa:
Gir
ldon'
tactal
lst
upi
dyouknow
exact
lywhatI
'mtal
ki
ngabout
Shewasusi
ngt
heAmeri
canaccentandy
ou
woul
dshewasfr
om t
her
e.
Me:
I'
mti
redl
et'
sgohome
Thatwastheonl yexcuseIhadjusttoescape
herquest
ionsaboutmeandKhany iso.Wepaid
thendi
dsomewi ndowshoppi ngwithfr
iend,
I
call
edacabandi twasal r
eadytherewhenwe
whereexi
tingthemal l
.ThandiandIshareda
hugthenbaby ki
ssedpeoplethoughtwewer e
l
esbianandkeptonpoi nti
ngfinger
satusev en
thecabdri
v erhowcanpeoplebesomet i
mes?
Me:
Seey
out
omor
rowf
ri
end 
Thandi
:
Byef
ri
end
Igoti
ntot
hecabandthedri
verdroveoff
,Igav
e
hi
m di
rect
ionst
otheapar
tments.Ipai
dthen
gotofft
hecabImademywayt othecondo,I
openedthedoor.Icoul
dhearlaughscoming
fr
om theli
vi
ngroom soIdecidetogoand
check.
 
Didhereal
lybringhi
schickwit
hsohecanr ubit
i
nmyf ace?Mencanbej er
kssometimes!He
ki
ssedherlipsashesawmepassi ng.I
twas
Lungel
okissinghisgi
rl
fr
iendandthei
rfi
ngers
wrappedaroundeachothershands.
 
Iwasn'tjeal
ousnorpi ssedbecauseevery
feel
ingIhadf orhim hadjustdi
sappereadfr
om
mysy stem.SoIj ustsmiledtoshowsome
grat
itudetowardst hem,Bandiwaswi t
hhis
dearestKhazimlaandot herdudesalsosome
gir
ls
Me:
Heyguy
s
Them:
Hi
It
ookoutt
hecr
edi
tcar
dandhadi
tov
ert
o
Bandi
l
e 
Bandi
l
e:Ipr
ayy
oudi
duseal
lofi
t 
Theot her
swerel
aughi
ngal
sodi
dI,Lungel
o
kepttraci
nghi
seyesont
omebutIdidn'
tmind
him atall
Me:
Nopej
ustaf
ewbucks
Bandil
ejustsmi
ledandfl
ickedtothestai
rcase
whichhemeantIshouldgot omyr oom.I
noddedthenwenttomyroom, Itookoffmy
schooluni
form.
 
Iwentt othebathroom andr anmy selfawarm,
bubblybat hIt
ookmyphoneandear plugst
hen
gotintothebathtub.ItwasjustHeav enon
Earthyouknow, afteranhourorsoIwentt omy
room thensatont opoft hebed.Al otwas
goingthroughmymi ndIalsodidn'tknowwhat
causedi tbutt
hef eel
ingsIfeltwerelike
somet hi
ngwasgoi ngtohappent omeor
somet hi
ng. 
Ilot
ionedthentr
iedonmyswi mmingcostumeI
real
lylookedgooditshowedever
ysingl
e
featureonmybodywel l
.Itooksomepi ctures
withmyphoneandsentt hem toThandazwat o
see, Iworemypy jamasandt uckedintobed.A
knockdi sturbedmypeacet herapysessiont hat
Ihav ewithmy sel
fev ery
dayj usttoclearallbad
i
ntent i
onsIhav egot,Iwentt oopeni ttherewas
Lungel oleaningov erthedoorl atch.
 
Hepushedhi
mselfi
ntomyroom andopened
hi
sarmswhilecomi
ngcloset
ome.Ilookedat
hi
mindisbel
i
ef 
Lungel
o:Si
ziImi
ssedy
ou,
notseei
ngy
oumade
megomad
Il
etoutachuckl
ethenl
ookedathi
m
Me:
Wow!That
'sr
ichcomi
ngf
rom y
ou 
Lungel
o:Li
stenIcoul
dn'tpr
etendinf
rontof
NwabisasoIhadt obreakal
lties
Her
eachedoutf
ormyhandbutIputr
est
ed
t
hem onmyhips
Me:
Idon'
tev
enwantt
oheary
ourst
upi
dassl
i
es
okay
?Justgetoutofmyr
oom pl
ease
Iwentt
ostandbyt
hedoorandIpoi
ntedt
othe
st
air
case
Lungel
o:Iwi
l
lcomeandpi
cky
ouupt
omor
row
Me:
Ther
ewon'
tbepi
cki
ngmeupt
omor
row 
Lungelodidn'tevenanswerIsl ammedt hedoor
behindhim, Iwentbackt omyphone.Lungel o
real
lyhadt hener veevenwhenhi sgi r
lf
riendis
around,Imeantt hosewor dswhenIsai dto
Lungelothatwewer edone.Myst omachwas
grumblingsoIwentt ot hekit
chen, i
twasso
quit
eIguessIwashomeal onewhi chwasni ce.
Imademy selfamacar oniandcheeset hen
pouredmy selfjuiceIwentt oeatint heliving
room whilewat chingsomeSof i
at heFi r
ston
DisneyJunior.Iwasar ealcart
oonf anIcan'tlie,
Iwenttowashmydi shesinthekitchen.Iwi ped
them andwentbackt omyr oom, Ituckedi nto
bedandsl ept.
*
***

Thef oll
owi ngdayIwokeup, thankGodi twas
Friday.Iwasi nt hecor rectmood, li
feseemedt o
beawesomeandev erythingwasj ustinor der
.I
cli
mbedof fbedt henf ixedmybedandwentt o
thebat hroom, Ibr ushedmyt eeththentooka
quickshower .If inishedt henl oti
onedandwor e
myuni form wi thabl azer, If
ixedmyhai rintoa
bun.Iwentdownst airswi thmybagpack
strappeduponmyshoul der,Imademy sel f
cerealandpour edcof feei ntoamug.Iwentt o
thelivi
ngr oom andst artedeat i
ng,myphone
startedtor i
ngsoIt ooki toutf r
om myski rt
pocket ,Icheckedt hecal lerident i
tyi
twas
Bandi l
esoIpi ckedup
Me:
Abhut
i
Him:Heygi
rlIwon'
tbeablet
otakey
out
o
schoolt
odayI'
m outoft
own
Me:
Whatdoy
oumeany
ouar
eoutoft
own?
Hi
m:WellI
'minGeorgeandIwi
l
lbebackon
Mondaynextweek
Me:
Real
l
y?!Nonocomebackt
omor
row
Hi
m:Ican'
tsi
sIneedt
ogoandIl
ovey
ou
Me:
ByeIl
ovey
oual
so
Wehungupatt hesamet ime,soIwashome
alonef ortheweekend.Ial wayswantedtostay
aloneint heapartment ,
soItookwentt o
Bandile'sroom becausehet ol
dmeIwoul dget
thelunchmoneyt here.ItookaR100not einthe
drawerandwentbackt otheli
v i
ngroom,Itook
mybagt henl
ockedt heapartmentdoor.AsI
openedt hegat
et oleavetheapar t
ment
groundsIsawLungel o'scarandhewas
standingnexttoi t
.IactedasifIdidn'
tseehim
andwentt otheleftsideoftheroad
Lungel
o:Don'
tactasi
fyoudi
dn'
tseeme
Hewasli
ter
all
ybreat
hingcl
oset
omyneckand
Iknewhewasnexttome
Me:
Woul
dyoul
eav
emeal
one
Lungelo:
CanIatl
eastt
akey
out
oschool
andI
canleaveyou?
It
houghtt
omysel
fIwoul
dsavesomemoney
byget
ti
ngafr
eeri
defr
om hi
m soInodded
Lungel
o:ThankscanIhav
eyourbag?
Igaveittohim,heopenedthepassangerdoor
formet ogetinsoIwentinwhileheplacedmy
baginthebackseat.Herantohisseatand
star
tedtheenginethecarstar
tedmovingata
slowpace.Thecarwasf il
l
edwi t
hsil
enceandI
wasn'tgoingtoent
ertai
nhim. 
Lungel
o:Igety
ouaremadatmeforall
Idi
dto
youbutI'
m sorr
yfr
om t
hebot
tom ofmyhear
t
Me:
It
'sokayLungel
oI'
m ov
ert
hat
Lungel
o:Socanwebef
ri
endsandal
lthat
?
WashethinkingIwoul
dlethi
m backtomyli
fe
agai
n?Het houghtwr
ongIwouldneverev
enifI
hadnofr
iends
Me:
Idon'
tthinksoLungelocany
oupl
easedr
ive
f
ast
erIdon'twantt
obel ate
Lungelolookedreal
lydi
sappointedbuti t
'swhat
theheartwantedandIcouldn'tstopit
.He
droppedmeof fandschool hedidn'
tev ensay
goodbyebutIalsowasn'treadyforitbecausei t
mighthav ebeenacoldgoodby e.Hedr oveoff
atahighspeedIent er
edtheschool grounds, I
getpull
edasIst ar
twalki
ng.ItwasKhany iso
pull
ingme
Me:
Whatdoy
ouwant
?
Khany
iso:
Ineedt
otel
lyousomet
hing
Me:
Whati
sit
? 
Khanyiso:IhavebeenholdingthisSiziphi
weI
l
ov eyou, Imaybeapl ayboybutthatdoesn't
meanIcantl ovesomeonel i
kelovet hem.Ev
er
si
nceIl aidmyey esony ouIjustfel
lonmy
kneesf oryou.Youarebeautiful
,funnyand
every
thingIal waysneededingirlbutI
understandify ouwil
lsayno
Befor
eIcouldanswerKhany
iso,
hehadalready
l
eftmet her
estandi
ngwit
hhiswordsci
rculai
ng
mymi nd.
Leavi
ngmeoccupi
edwhet
herIshoul
dsayy
es
orno!
 
Ineverhear
danyguytal
kaboutmel i
kethat
thi
swast hefi
rst
.Iwasst
arti
ngtofal
lfort
he
guyinst
eadofbeinghi
sfr
iend..
..

Mol
weni
Agai
nBel
ovedOnes 

[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t20
Icoul
dn'tconcetr
ateintheclass,
Ikept
repl
ayi
ngwhatKhany i
sosaidinmyhead.Tot el
l
thetr
uthIwasj ustf
all
inghardforKhanyiso
eachandev ery
daythatcan'tbestoppedIthinkI
waslovestruck.Thebellr
angandt hat'
sthe
onlyt
hingthatbroughtmebackt olif
e,Istood
upfr
om mychai
randfol
lowedbehindtheot
her
ki
dsunt
ilmyMathemati
csteachercal
l
edme
whowasMrsOli
fant
Me:
Mam?
Ol
ifant
:Si
zi
phi
weIseeyouwerenotpay
ing
at
tenti
onincl
ass,
isev
ery
thi
ngokay?
Ishookmyheady
esandl
ookedbackather
Ol
i
phant
:I
fyouhav
eanypr
obl
em athome,
tel
l
meokay
?
Shetookmyhandandpushedi twi
thher'
s.I
wasabi tconf
usedwhatwoul
dshemeant
aboutsaying"
ift
her
e'ssomet
hingwrongat
home". 
Me:
Iwi
l
ldosomam (
smi
l
ingather
)
Ol
i
phant
:Thanks 
Angel
youcangof
orbr
eak
Iexit
edt hecl
assr
oom andmademywayt othe
tuckshopIboughtthesameoldmeal.
Thandazwawav edatmet oi
ndicat
ehersel
f
wher eshewas,soIwenttoher.
Isatnexttoherthentookoutmyphoneand
wentt oKhanyi
so'scontactandItypeda
message, "
KhanyisoIal
sol oveyoubutI
'm not
sureyouaretheright
fulpersonforme"thenI
pressedsend.
 
Iopenedmywat erthenjustst
aredintothi
nai
r
wit
houttaki
ngasipf rom t
hewat er
,Thandi
snappedherfi
ngersinfrontofmyf ace.I
quickl
ycl
osedmyey esandopenedt hem 
Thandi
:
Mgani
what
'
seat
ingy
oui
nsi
de?
Me:
Not
hingf
ri
end,
whatwoul
dmakey
out
hink
t
hat
?
Ismi
ledfaint
lyj
ustt
oconf
useherbutmyf
ri
end
woul
dn'tbackdown
Thandi:
Youbarelytouchedyourfoodandyou
alsokeepgl
ancingaty ourphone,pl
easef
ri
end
tell
mewhat'seatingyou?
Me:Nothing!Don'
tyougetitnot
hingi
swr
ong!
St
opf ussinginmybusiness
Ij
ustsnappedatThandazwabecauseofmi
xed
emotionsgoi
ngthr
oughmyhead, Ist
oodup
andtookmybag
Thandi
:
I'
m sor
ryf
ri
end!
 
Me:
Justsav
eit
,Idon'
twantt
oheari
t
Imov edawayf rom herthenrant othetoi
l
ets
andIl ockedmy sel
finoneoft hem.Iknow
Thandazwadi sli
kedseeingmei nthatwaybutI
couldn'thol
dbackany thi
ng.Iinsertedmy
earphonesandt urnedthev ol
umeupt oapoint
wher eyoucouldhearany thi
ng!Myphone
start
edr i
ngingIansweredwi t
houtcheckingthe
call
eridenti
ty 
Me:
Tal
k!
Cal
ler
:Si
zi
phi
wedoy
our
eal
l
yknowwhaty
ou
want?
Iremovedmyphonefr
om myeart
ocheckt
he
call
erandi
twasKhanyi
so
Hi
m:Imeany
oul
ovemeandIl
ovey
oubuti
t
seemst
hiswon'
twor
koutf
orus
Me:Khanyi
soI
'
m notaf
rai
dofbei
ngi
na
r
elati
onshi
pwi
thyoubut
Hi
m:Butwhat
?
It
ookadeepbr
eat
hinandst
art
edt
alki
ng
Me:I
'm af
rai
dthaty
ourtact
icsofbei
ngaplayer
won'
tstopandIwil
lbedealingwi
thyoursi
de
chi
ckseverynowandthen
Him:
BooI
'
m wil
li
ngtochangef
ory
ounot
hing
canst
opmefr
om doingt
hat
Me: Mmhr eal
l
y?Soy ouhav echangedi fy
ousti
ll
touchgirl
sthi
ghsinschool orsti
l
lhaving
i
ntercousewiththem!Isthatthechangey ou
tal
kingaboutoryouarejustgoingfurtherwi
th
beingthebaddestassofbei ngaplayer?Ist
hat
i
t?
Therewasnoresponsefr
om him andIknewI
tal
keddeepbutthatwasreal
i
tywel i
vedin
Me:
Ij
ustknewi
tyoucan'
tev
enanswera
quest
ion!
Him:Thanksal otforjudgi
ngmeasi fI
'
m no
humanbei ng.Ialsohav efeel
i
ngst
oobut
anywaysy oumadeamar konwhereIstand
wit
hy ou.Goodby eSiziphi
we
Me:
Idi
dn'
t-
Thephonestar
tedbeepi
ngi
nthebackgr
ound
bef
oreIcoul
dfini
shmysent
ence
Me:
Idi
dn'
tmeant
osayt
hat
. 
Okay!Every
thingwasjustarackImeanthe
cl
osestpeopleIpushedthem totheedgeofa
cl
if
f,readyforthem t
ofal
lof
fespecial
ly
Thandazwa. 
Ihadtogomakepeacewi thherIcheckedmy
wristwatchitwasal r
eady5mi nutesbefore
schoolcomesout .Iwai tedforafewmi nutes
thebellr
angandev er
yonewasmaki nganoise,
Itookthatopportunit
yt oleavethetoil
etsat
l
eastjusttonotletany oneseeIwasi nther
efor
afullhour.Iscannedar oundtheyardtol
ookfor
Thandazwa, Isawherst andi
ngunderatr
ee
beingoccupiedwi thherphone.Iwalkedtoher
,
Amangel ewasn'tcomi ngt oschool
Iguessshe
wasabi tembar rasedofcomi ngwithabig
tummyt oschool . 
Me:
Fri
endshi
p!
Thandazwarai
sedherheadt
olookatmet
hen
backatherphone
Thandi
:
Oh!I
t'
syou
Ouch!That
'swascol
dbutIdeser
vedi
tfr
om
l
osingmytemperonher
Me:
Whoel
sewoul
ditbe?
Shepressedthepowerbut
tononherphoneand
pl
aceditinherpocket
Thandi:
Someonewhot alkstoherf r
iendi nt
ime
ofdist
ressanddoesn'
tjustsnapofbei ngasked.
Sizi
Iexpectedmorethant hatf
rom y ou,I
shouldhaveknownthaty oudon'twantpeopl e
i
nyourbusi
nessandI
'
m sor
ry
Shesoundedasifshewantedtocryor
somethi
ngbutIunderst
oodwhereshecame
fr
om.Abiglumpf or
medonmyt hroatIthought
tomysel
f,whyshouldIhur
therli
ket hat
.
Me:NoI'
mt hereonewhoissupposedt
osay
sorr
ytoyou!ButmganiIshoul
dn'
thave
snappedl
ikethat.
 
Thandazwa:
Ideserv
edthatbecauseIli
ke
st
icki
ngmynosei nt
oyourbusiness 
Ishookmyheadnoandwr
appedmyar
m
aroundherneck 
Me:
Thosearejustbenefi
tsofhavi
ngabest
f
ri
endbecauseyoustressoutli
keasi
sterf
or
meandIappreci
atethat
Thandazwa:That
'ssweetfr
iendandIal
so
appreci
ateseei
ngyoutalkl
ikethat
Iopenedmyar
msforahugandspr
eadabi
g
smil
euponmyface
Me:
Truce?
Thandazwa:
Truce 
mgani
Wehuggedf
oracoupl
eofsecondsandl
etgo
Me:Chocol
atecakeandLat
teatmyhouset
his
ev
ening?
Thandazwa:
Eveni
ng?
Me:
Yesi
twi
l
lbesomesor
tofsl
eepov
er
Thandazwa:
Iwi
l
lbethereby6:
45Ipr
omi
seand
pl
easesendmetheco-ordi
nat
es 
Me:Hahawi
lldoso,
letmecal
lacabt
ocome
andpickmeup
Thandazwa:
Wher
e i
syourbr
other
?Isn'
the
supposetopi
cky
ouup?
Me:
Hei
soutoft
own 
Thandazwa:That
'
swhyyouar
easki
ngmef ora
sl
eepover?Someonei
sscar
edofbedbugs
Me:
Yousogoof
yyouknowt
hat
?
Wewer elaughi
ngnon-
stop,Thandazwawasan
actual
lybestf
ri
endtohave.Shewasakeeperi
n
otherwords.
Thandazwa:
Onlyf
oryoumyf
ri
endt
hat
'
swhen
mywi l
dnesscomesout
Me:
Youar
esomet
hingel
se!
Icalledthecabandaf t
er10mi nutesitwas
alr
eadywai ti
ngformebyt heschool gate.
Thandazwawasget ti
ngpickedupbyhersi ster
sowewentourseper ateway s.Thecabdr i
ver
drov etotheapar
tment sIpaidandst rol
ledto
thecondo.Iopenedt hedoorwi t
hmykey sI
threwmybagacr osstheli
v i
ngr oom while
takingtheremotetoswi t
chont hetel
evisi
on. 
Ilaidonthe"L"chairIwasrethi
nki
ngev er
ythi
ng
IsaidtoKhanyisoev entear
swerestarti
ngto
escapef r
om myey es.Iwasn'tt
hatpersonwho
l
ikedt oseeormakeany onesaidandal lt
hat,
afterwipi
ngawayt hetearsIwenttomyr oom
andt ookoffmyschool unif
orm.Iworeasi mpl
e
fl
owereddressandfl
ipfl
opsthenwentt
othe
ki
tchenandprepar
edacheesesandwhichfor
my sel
fwhi
lstpour
ingjui
ceint
oaglass.
 
Aftereat
ingIri
nsedthedishesandsweeped
thefloor
,Iwasfeeli
ngti
redsoIrest
edont he
couch.Ifoundmy sel
fdeepinsl
eep.

*
***
Aknockwasgoingthr
oughthedoornon-
stop
andIwasst
arti
ngtogetpi
ssedbecausethat
per
sonwasdist
urbi
ngmysleep. 
Me:
Okay
!Okay
!Iwi
l
lbet
her
e
Isl
ippedint
omyf li
pfl
opsanddraggedmybody
tothedoor,Iunlockedthedooranditwas
Thandazwa, shewascar r
yingaAdi
das
sport
sbag
Me:
Youknowhowt
oknockmyf
ri
end
Thandazwa:
Youar
enotopeni
ngupsowhatdi
d
Idowrong?
Imov
edawayf
rom t
hedoorandshewal
kedi
n 
Me:
Letmegoandrinsemymout
hyoucan
swi
tchont
het
elev
ision
Thandazwa:
Okayf
ri
end
Itookthesport
sbagandwenttoputi ti
nmy
room thenqui
cklyri
nsedmymout h.Iappl
i
ed
l
ipiceonmyl i
ps,Iwentdownst
air
st o
Thandazwa. 
Me:
Comeandhel
pmewi
tht
hef
ood
Thandazwa:
Okayf
ri
endIhopei
t'
ssomet
hing
mouthwater
ing
Shewaswal
ki
ngbehi
ndmeandl
aughi
ng
Me:
Lat
teandcakemyf
ri
end
Thandazwa:
Onl
y?!
!Youhav
enohospi
tal
i
ty
mgani
Il
aughedather
Me:
Justki
ddi
ng!
It
ookoutcansofcool
dri
nksandsomecar
amel
i
ce-
cream al
sosomepopcor
ns.
 
Thandazwa:
Nowt
hat
'sasl
eepov
er
Me:
YouseeIhav
ehospi
tal
i
ty
Thandazwa:Iguesssowoul
dyout
ell
mewhat
'
s
wrongplease?
Me:
Let
'
sgosi
tdownandIwi
l
ltel
lyou
Wet ooktheitemsandthenwentt
ositint
he
couch.Itookadeepbreathandst
art
edtal
king
fr
om stratchaboutmeandKhanyi
so. 
Thandazwawasr
eal
l
yshockedandamazedat
thesameti
me
Thandazwa:
Youwi
l
lbest
rongmgani
forme
Me:
Iwi
l
l
Shehuggedmeandwest art
edeatingtheice-
cream whi
l
etalki
ngandcr
ackingsomej okes.
Afterawhi
lewewatchedsomer omanceand
comedymov i
es,wewereal
sosheddingt ear
s. 
Wespentt
hewhol
eni
ghtt
alki
nganddoi
nggi
rl
y
stuff
,asIsai
dThandazwawasat r
uefri
end.A
personthatwouldbemyrightsi
deforever
,I
wasr eal
lybl
essedtohav
eaf ri
endli
keher.
Wesleptwi
thourheadscl
oset
ogetherand
t
hoseweremoment sIwoul
dcher
ishforev
er.
..
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t21 
Mybodywasst if
fwhenIwokeup,Ithi
nkitwas
theeffectthathappenswhenyousleeponthe
sofaallnight.Thepl
acewascleannotevena
plateonthecof feet
able,
soIstoodand
stret
ched. 
Imademywayt otheki
tchen,
Thandazwawas
dri
nki
ngsomethi
ngfrom mugandsteam was
comingoutf
rom i
t
Me:
Letmeguessi
sthatLat
te?
Thandi:
Youknowmyf r
iendany
way
swemust
getreadyf
orthePA-
RTY
Myfri
endwasj
ustr
atchetf
rom heract
ionsy
ou
coul
dtel
l
Me:
What
'st
her
usht
othi
s"Par
ty"
? 
Imadeqout
ati
onmar
ksinthi
nair,
Thandazwa
j
ustl
ookedatmewi
thnoresponse
Thandi
:
Isthatar
hetori
cal
quest
ionbecausei
fit
i
s,Iwon'
tanswerthat
Me:
Noneedt oanswert
hatwasj
ustst
upi
dit
y
t
hatIasked
Thandi
:
Goodt
haty
ouknow
It
ookoutt
wobowlsf
rom thecupboar
dthen
pl
acedt
hem ont
heki
tchencounter
Me:
Cor
nFl
akesorWeet
-Bi
x?
Thandazwa:
Weet
-Bi
xmaket
hem oneandahal
f
Ihandedov ert
heboxt oherwhil
epouri
ngthe
CornFlakesint
omybowl .Iaddedcoldmil
kand
sugarint
ot hebowlandstart
edeati
ng.Iwashed
mybowl andher'
sthenwenttotakeashower
whil
eThandazwawaswashi ngi ntheguest
r
oom, It
ookawar m, l
ongbath.Ifi
nishedand
woremyswi mmi ngcostumeandshor tsthen
f
ixedmyhai r
,Iappliedsomelipsti
ck.Iwasn't
t
hattypewhol i
kedmake- upifyougi v
eme
l
ipst
ickt
henI '
m allsort
ed."
Scoob"( anickname
t
hatIgotfrom her)IheardThandazwat iny
voi
cecall
ingme
Me:
Fluf
fyi
nmyr
oom!
Thedooropentoanext
entwher
eIthought
therewer
epoli
ceint
hefl
atandThandiwas
pressi
ngonhercost
umezip
Thandi
:
Cany
ouassi
stmeher
e?
Me:
Sur
e
Ipul
l
edt
hezi
pupandf
ixedherhai
r.
 
Thandi
:
Thecabwi
l
lbeher
ein20mi
nut
es
Me:Okaywhichshoesshoul
dIwear
,the
gl
adiat
torheel
sorsandal
s?
Thandi
:
Sandal
swoul
dbeokay
 
Me:
Sur
ethi
ng
SoIworemysandalsandpackedsomej eans
wit
hadenimjacketinmybagpack.Ifol
lowed
outmyroom Thandazwawhowascr azyabout
goi
ngtothi
sparty!
 
Iwenttot hekit
chenandgr abbedanappl
ein
thef
ruitbasketthenstart
edeat i
ngit
,myphone
wasringingandIcheckedt hecall
eri
dent
it
yit
wasKhany i
so.Iwonderedtomy sel
fwhatdi
d
hewant ?SoIanswer edthecall
 
Me:
Kay
Pee 
Hi
m:HeyScoob,
arey
ougoi
ngt
othepar
ty?
Me:
Yeswhy
?
Hi
m:Iwantt
ocomeandpi
cky
oual
soIneedt
o
t
alkt
oyou 
Me:
Youcancomewhatdowantt
otal
kabout
?
Him:Iwantt
otal
kfacet
ofacenotov
ert
he
phone 
Me:
Cool
wet
hencant
alk
Hi
m:Sendmet
heco-
ordi
nat
est
oyourhouse
Me:
Okaywi
l
ldoso
Hi
m:Sur
eseey
out
hen
Me:
Seey
ou
Wehungupatt hesamet i
meandIwasamazed
hewouldcallmeaft
erIsaidthosewor
dst
ohim
ontheprev
iousday,soThandazwawaswai
ti
ng
formeimpati
entl
y 
Thandi
:
Can'
twegonow?
!
Me:
Wecan'
tKhany
isoi
scomi
ngt
opi
ckusup
Thandi
:
Tel
lhi
mtohur
ryupIneedsomebooz
e
Me:
Chi
l
lfr
iendy
ouwi
l
lgety
ourbooze
Isatonthechai
rnextt
oThandazwaand
star
ingdownatmyphonetoseeifhehas
repl
iedt
omymessageornot .
Aft
erwait
ingf
oratleast30mi
nut
esor
somethi
ngKhanyi
sosaidhewaswai
ti
ng
outsi
deforus,ThandiandItookourt
hingsand
exit
edtheflatwi
thmel ocki
ngthedoorbehind
us.Therewasawhi t
eVW Gol fGTIwi
thtint
ed
windowsandKhany i
sowasl eani
ngnexttothe
passengerdoor,
 
Khany
iso:
Ladi
es!
 
Us:
Hey
 
Heopenedhi sarmstohugThandazwaand
theyhuggedthenhuggedme.Hi sCologne
becamet oxi
ntomysensesl eavi
ngmemy
poisonedsoulr
unningwild,soheopenedt he
doorformeandIgoti n.Ifastenedmyseatbelt
andKhany i
sostart
edthecart hendroveoff.
..
.
Wewer etalki
nginthecarl
ikenoconf l
ict
happenedbetweenus,sothedr i
vetothisevent
wasqui t
elongIevenendedupsl eepi
ng.A
photosoundwokemeupandIsl owlyopened
myey es,i
twasThandazwahol di
ngupher
cel
lphoneinfrontofmyface
Khany
iso:
Woul
dyoupl
easesendmet
hatsnap?
Theywer
elaughi
ngwhi
leIwassti
ll
rubbi
ngmy
eyest
ogetmyblurv
isi
ontofadeaway
Me:
Noonei
sget
ti
ngapi
ctur
eofmesl
eepi
ng!
 
Khany
iso:
Wewi
l
l
Thandazwa:
SentKay
pee!
Khany
iso:
Yout
her
ebest
Theybumpedf
ist
s 
Me:
Hav
en'
twear
ri
vedatt
hispl
ace?
Khany
iso:
In5wewi
l
lbet
her
e
Thandi
:
Itseemsl
i
kef
orev
ert
il
lwegett
her
e
KhanyisoraisedupthespeedofthecarIwas
evenholdingthedoorjustt
ositproperly
.Inev
er
beeninacarwhi chwasdr i
venli
ket hati
nmy
enti
relif
e,yesBandi
ledoesdrivefastbutno
l
ikethat. 
Therewereal otofcar
ssurroundingt
heplace,
Thandiscreamed" Wuw!Thanky ouLord!
"So
thi
swast heplace,i
twasjustasi mpl
emassive
housewit
hpool
sout
sidei
nasubur
ban
nei
ghbour
hood 
Khany
iso:
Sizi
wel
comet
othepar
ty!
 
Me:
Ist
hisi
t?
Khany
iso:
Whatdi
dyout
hinki
twas?
Ishruggedmyshoulder
sandhest oppedi
nthe
parki
ngs,sowegotoffthecarandKhanyi
so
str
etchedouthi
shandt ohol
dmi neandI
all
owedhimt odoso. 
Therewasev ery
thingthatwouldt
hinkoftobe
i
napar tystar
ti
ngf rom l
iqourt
opooltabl
es,I
social
i
sedwi t
hev eryoneandIwasgoing
aroundwithThandazwa.  
Thandi
:
Shot
s?
Shewashol
dingav
odkabot
tl
einherhand
Me:
Onewoul
dbef
ine
Shepour
editformethenIgulpeditdownmy
thr
oatwi
thalemonjui
ceafterthattoremov
e
thebit
tertast
e.Thisgir
lcamet owardsusand
shewasshor t,dar
kincomplexion.She
whisperedinmyear" Pi
ll
ayiscall
ingyou"she
point
edbysomecor ri
dorwhichlookedprett
y
darktomeabi tcreepyIwouldsay
Me:
Ishet
her
e?
Gi
rl
:Yesf
oll
owme
Itol
dThandazwawher eIwasgoingandshe
j
ustnodded.I
'm notsuresheheardmefrom t
he
l
oudmusi cwhichwaspl ay
ing,
Ifol
lowedbehi
nd
thi
sgirl
andKhany i
sowast her
estandi
ngbythe
corr
idor
. 
Gi
rl
:Her
eshei
s!
Khany
iso:
Thanks 
Nel
Her
:Any
timebr
o
Shelef
tust
oget
her
,st
ari
ngi
ntoeachot
her
's
eyes
Me:
What
?
Khanyi
so:
Your
eal
l
yhur
tmeov
ert
hecal
l
yest
erday
Me:
Sor
rymanIdi
dn'
tmeant
o
Khanyi
so:Si
ziphiwey oumustknowwhenIsayI
l
oveyou,Inev erfel
tli
kethisaboutagi
rlinmy
ent
ir
elif
e.*Het ookmyl efthand*Iwi
llputa
di
amondi nthishandonedayIpr omi
sey ou!
Ij
ustpushedasmi
l
eandagi
ggl
eatt
hesame
ti
me
Me:
Icoul
dseet
hatdayhappeni
ng
Khany
iso:
Itseemsy
oudon'
tappr
ovewhatIsay
Me:
Ireal
l
ydon'
t 
Khany
iso:
Youdon'
t,
ouch!
Hepl
acedhi
shandonhi
shear
tandpul
l
edme
t
ohim
Khanyi
so:
Thi
sisy
ourhomeandy
ouwi
l
lbe
mine!
 
Wi
thoutgi
vi
ngmet
hechancet
oanswerhi
sli
ps
wereal r
eadyl ockedinmi ne.Ourtongues
embr acedt helovewehav eforeachotherand
ourli
psbr ingingpleasureintooursight
s, t
he
ki
sscont inuedf oracoupleofmi nutesandwe
stoppedwhenwewer ebreathi
ngheav i
ly.Iwas
l
eftspeechl essnotev enhav i
ngthewor dsto
describehowIf el
t
Khanyi
so:
ThatwasgoodcanIhav
eanot
herone
pl
ease?
Il
ookedathi
mindi
sbel
i
ef
Me:Youtooki
tyour
selfl
et'
sgobacktothe
ot
hersbefor
etheyt
hinkwehavedisappear
ed
Khany
iso:
Youar
eri
ghtl
et'
sgo!
 
Wewal kedbacktother
est
,jami
ngalongthe
songsbeingplay
edbytheDJtoget
her.YesI
wastakingsomesipsfr
om somecidersand
vodkas.

*
***
AsIwasholdi
ngther
edandwhit
ecup,
Ifel
tmy
l
eftfi
nger
scri
ppl
eandthecupsl
i
ppedf
rom my
hands.
 
Ifell
onthefloorhit
ti
ngthepavementhardbut
somet hi
ngwasoddbecauseIcoul dhear
everyonechatt
ingandmov i
ngaroundbutI
wasn'tmov i
ngordoinganyt
hing.Somegirl
quickl
ycamet omeandkeptsl appi
ngmyf ace
softl
ybutthatdidn'
tmakeanydiff
erence
Gi
rl
:May
beshei
shav
ingast
roke
Olwet
hu:
Shoul
dn'
twecal
ltheambul
anceor
somethi
ng?
Gir
l:
Ofcoursei
diotdowanthert
odi
eont
his
pavement?
Ever
ythi
ngstar
tedtogoi
nslowmot i
on,my
mouthwasactuall
ymovi
ngtot helef
tandmy
headstayedi
nthesameposit
ion. 
Gi
rl
:Makei
tsnapt
her
e!Br
ingmeacupofwat
er
andi
ceal
soacushi
on.
Icoul
dheart
heambulancesir
enscoming
cl
oserandcl
osert
ous,I'
m notsur
ewhere
ThandazwawasbutKhanyi
sowasnexttome
squeezi
ngmyhand. 
Nothingwasmaki ngsenseatthatmomentI
wascar r
iedintot heambul ancewit
hastroll
er.
Anoxy genmaskwaspl acedonmynoseand
needleswer einser t
edinmyar m.Wegott othe
hospital
Iwasr ushedt otheEmergencyunit
,the
doctorscamet oexami nemeasmuchasI
wantedt otalkIcoul dn'
t. 
Doct
or:
Whathappened?
Khanyi
so:Wewerehavi
ngapart
yatmyhouse
andshejustcol
l
apsedont
othepavement
Doct
or:
Didn'
tshehi
tthepav
ementonherhead?
Khany
iso:
Ithi
nkshedi
d
Doct
or:
Wewil
ldosomebloodtestsonherand
anMRIscant
oseeifshedi
dn'
tfract
ure
any
thi
ng,
arey
ouherf
ami
l
yorsomet
hing?
Khanyi
soshookhi
sheadandt
hedoct
orl
ooked
athi
m
Doct
or:
Doy
ouhav
etheynumber
sorsomet
hing?
Khany
iso:
Icancal
lthem 
Doct
or:
Pleasedosowhi
l
eIdosomebl
ood
t
estsonher 
Khanyisoshookhi
sheadupanddownthent
he
doctorlef
tther
oom,Khany
isoki
ssedmy
for
ehead 
Khany
iso:
Youwi
l
lgetbet
termyl
oveIpr
omi
se
Icoul
dn'
trespondt
ohi
minanyway
. 
Whatwashappeni
ngt
ome?Am Il
i
vingundera
dar
kcloud?
 
Thi
swerequest
ionsgoingthr
oughmymi nd
andIcoul
dn'
ter
asethem li
keerasi
ngpenci
l
wri
ti
ngsfr
om apieceofpaper
!
Li
fej
ustseemedt
obeagr
eatt
heor
ythatcan
nev
erbechangedbyany
one.
 
.
..
..
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t22
Iwokeupt henextdayandscannedar oundthe
room, itwasunf amili
artothesur roundingsI'
m
usedt o.Ilookedatthebedi twashospi tal
beddingst hatcoveredthemat t
ressandasheet
whichcov eredme,Ihadf orgett
ent hatIwasi n
hospital.Khanyisoheadwasbur iedunderhi s
armsnextt omyhandsoIshookhi m andhe
quickl
yr aiseduphishead
Me:
Wat
te-
Khany
iso:
Wat
er?
Inoddedandhestoodupfrom thechai
rtopour
waterinthegl
ass,
Khany
isohelpedmedr i
nk
wit
ht hestr
aw. 
Khany
iso:
Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
Hewasbrushi
ngbackmyhai
randsmi
l
edatme
showi
ngoffhi
sri
ghtsi
dedi
mple
Me:
I'
m doi
nggoodatl
eastIcant
alkpr
oper
ly
Khany
iso:
That'
s 
good,Ical
l
edy
ourbr
otheri
fit
washimthatIcal
led
Me:Heisgoi
ngt
ofr
eakoutwhenhehear
s
aboutt
his
Khany
iso:
Let
'sbet
terhopehedoesn'
t
Inoddedt osay"
Hopeso"andt
hedoor
suddenlyopenedwi
thnowarni
ngofaknock,
it
wasBandi l
eandhecametomysideandgave
meat ighthug
Bandi
l
e:Ar
eyouokay
? 
Me:Wecoul
dsaysoI
'
m qui
tebet
tert
hanl
ast
ni
ght
Bandi
ler
aiseduphiseyest
olookatKhanyi
so,
I
thi
nkhewast r
yingt
ofamil
i
ari
zehim wi
th
someone
Me:
Thisi
sKhanyi
somyf
ri
end,
Khany
isot
hisi
s
mybrot
herBandi
l
e
Khany
iso:
Sal
ute 
Grot
man(
Greet
ingsBi
gMan)
Bandi
l
e:Sur
ent
wana(
Boy
)
Brotherscanbecr azysomet i
mes,Bandil
ekept
steali
nggl ancestol ookatKhanyi
sowhichwas
maki nghim abi tnervous.Thedooropened
oncemor ebutt herewasaknockt hi
ssecond
ti
mear ound,itwast hedoctorandmoment ar
il
y
heent eredThandazwawasbehi ndhim
Doct
or:
Morni
ngev
ery
one,
Ihopemypat
ienti
s
doi
ngwell
?
Me:
I'
m goodDocqui
tebet
teri
fImaysay
 
Doctor:
That'
sgoodtohear,
Ihavegoty
our
bl
oodt estr
esul
tsandtheyseem t
obe
eventual
lyt
ri
cky
Bandi
l
e:What
'st
hatsupposet
omean?
Thedoct
oropenedt
hef
il
eandl
ookedatal
lof
us
Doctor:
WhatImeani sthatt
hereisno
substanceoranyt
hingfoundinSiziphi
we's
blood.Wedon'thaveanyscient
if
ical
explai
nati
ontowhatmaycausedt hestroket
o
occur 
Bandi
le:
Whatdoy ougetpai
dfor?Totel
lusy
ou
don'
thaveexpl
ainat
ionstoourpr
obl
ems
Hewasfumingwithangerbuthecouldn'tt
ake
i
toutwit
hafist
-f
ight.Thedoctorwasjust
chi
ll
edwit
heveryt
hingbecausehedealswith
peopl
ewhoareli
keBandi l
eeveryday
.
Me:
Takei
teasyabhut
i 
Bandil
e:NoSizi
phi
we!Iwon'
tbeabl
etotakei
t
easyifIdon'
tknowwhat'
swrongwit
hyou!I
real
l
ycan't
Khany
isoandThandazwawerereall
yqui
te,
they
weret
herebyfl
eshbutnotbysoul.Imay
i
nter
pretthattheywereeachi
ntheyown
uni
versenotinthisEar
th.
Doctor
:Iunder
standitmaybef r
ustat
ingt
onot
knowwhatcausedt heinci
dentbutwemust
takeSi
ziphi
wef oranMRI
Bandi
l
e:Andwhati
sthatf
or?
Doctor
:Tochecki
fthereisnof
ract
urei
n
Si
ziphi
we'sbodyorskull
Bandi
l
e:Okaydoct
ory
oucandoso
Doctor
:Anur
sewi
l
lcomeandassi
sty
out
othat
room 
Me:
Okaydoc
Heexit
edt
her
oom,
Thandazwawashol
dingmy
hand
Me:
Wher
ewer
eyou?
Thandazwa:
Totell
youthetr
uth,
Idon'tknow
andfri
endsorr
yfornotcomi
ngwi t
hlastnight
Me:
Wer
eyout
hatdr
unky
oudi
dn'
thearany
si
rensorany
thi
ngl
i
ket
hat
?
Thandazwa:
Ihear
dthem butIt
houghtIwasi
na
dream 
Me:
Butany
way
sit
'
sni
cey
oucoul
dmakei
ther
e
Thandazwa:
Icoul
dn'
tl
etmyf
ri
endbeal
onei
n
thi
sroom
Khanyi
so:
Wear
eher
etokeephercompany
though
Bandi
l
e:Sayt
hatagai
n 
Thandazwa:
Sheunder
standswhatImeanokay
?
Wel aughedatt
hewayshesai
dthat,sot
he
nursecameandhelpedmechangeintot
he
hospital
gownthenl
oadedmeintoawheelchai
r.
Iwastreatedasaper sonthatisnotabl
eto
walkordoany t
hingsot henursetookmet o
someone, Iwasplacedintoabedandt henthe
bedwasr emotedt oenteratubeofsomesor t
.I
wasscaredaboutt hi
sMRIscanbecausei twas
mysomet hingthatIneverimaginedtobut
ev
eryt
hinghasi
t'
sfi
rstt
imeandt
hatwast
he
si
tuat
ionIwasi
n.
Doctor
:Youwontf
eel
anypai
nitdoesn'
tgi
veof
f
heatenergy
 
Me:
SoIwontf
eel
anyt
ypeofbuzzi
ngandal
l
t
hat
?
Doct
or:
Yes 
Therewer eredlazersgoingupanddownmy
body,Iwasgi venapai rof3Dglasseswhi ch
weredar kyoucouldn'tseethrought hem.Af ter
acoupleofmi nutesIwassentbackt omywar d,
theguyswer enotint heroom sot heyleftme
aloneinahospi t
alroom allbymy self.Boredom
stri
kedIlookedformagazi nesIcoul dn'tf
ind
them alsotheremot econtrolf
orthet elevisi
on,
theonlyresortIhadwast osl
eep.Icl osedmy
eyesthinki
nghowdi dthishappent ome?  
Itwasquiterar
efordoctorsnottof
indany
expl
ainat
ionsforsomethingyoumayhav e.I
evenregr
ettedgoingt
ot hatpart
ybuti
tcame
wit
ht heter
ri
tor yofbei
ngat eenager
.Star
ti
ng
fr
om beingaf arm gir
l/
slaveinherownhomet o
agirl
whof oundher selfi
nthebiggestci
ty
st
riv
ingtoachi evegoldinli
fe.
 
Quest
ionsst
art
edgoingt
hroughmymi
ndwi
th
answersf
oll
owi
ngthem! 
Ifoundmyselfsheddi
ngt ear
sbutIdon'
tknow
whatresul
tedinmecr yi
ngandIjustl
eftt
his
Earthgoi
ngtotheuniverseofsl
eep.

*
***

Iopenedmyeyeswit
hsomeonest
ari
ngatme,
I
l
ookedupitwasKhanyi
so
Me:
Duuudeee!
Khany
iso:
Youar
esobeaut
if
ulwheny
ouar
e
asl
eep
Me:
Howl
onghav
eyoubeenher
e?
Khany
iso:
Longenought
oseey
ousl
eep
Me:
Yousuchawei
rdo!
 
Hechuckl
edandhandedmeabr
ownpaperbag
Khany
iso:
Somesandwi
chandj
uiceboughtby
me
Me:
Thanksy
ousuchal
i
fesav
er 
Khany
iso:
Iknow
Hepull
edasmil
eacr
osshisf
aceandhest
and
onthechai
rwhi
chwasnextt
omybed,hewas
st
ari
ngatme
Me:
What
?
Khany
iso:
Younev
ert
oldmewher
eyouar
efr
om?
Icl
ear
edmyt
hroatandsatupst
rai
ghtt
oface
him
Me:I
'mfrom asmal
lvi
ll
agecl
oseto
Queenst
owni nt
heEast
ernCape
Khany
iso:
Youcomeaf
ar,
sohowwasi
tgr
owi
ng
upinavil
l
age?
HowwasIgoingtost
art
?SoIt
ookhi
shand
j
ustf
orcomfort
Me:From myexperi
encei
twasacol d-
hear t
ed
l
ifebecauseIwasaslaveathome,every
t hi
ng
hadtobedonebymeandsomet hi
ngsIt hought
maynev erhappent
omehappened
Helookedatmewit
hapuzzl
edf
aceandhi
s
ey
ebrowsroseup
Khany
iso:
Whatdoy
oumean?
 
Me:IfItel
lyouthi
syouwouldl
ookatme
diff
erentl
yandeventhi
nkI'
mjustaburdenor
j
ustav ict
im whoiscar
ryi
ngbadluckupon
them
Khanyi
so:
No!No!Si
ziIwouldneverl
ookatyou
i
notherwaynomatterwhathappenedtoyouI
wil
lbebyyoursi
de,
throughthi
ckandthi
njust
me
It
ookadeepbreat
handl
ookedst
rai
ghti
nto
Khany
iso'
sey
es
Me:I'
m avi
cti
m ofr apebymyst epfat
her,ontop
ofthatmymot herneverbeli
evedthatherso
cal
led"boy
fri
end"woul ddosuchhar mtome.
Shewouldalway ssayIkeepseducingherman
andwhenhewant stogetitIwil
lcomer unni
ng
toher
Tearswer
ealreadyrunningdownmyf aceand
Khanyi
sotri
edallhecouldtokeepmecal m,
tal
ki
ngaboutmydr eadfulpastawakenedmany
unheal
edwounds.ButIhadt otell
someone
abouti
tespeci
all
ywhoi sclosetomel i
ke
Khanyi
so.
 
Khany i
so:I
'
m notbeingdi
sr espectfult
owards
yourmot herbutareyousur ethafshe'syour
biologi
calmother?Imeannopar entinthis
whol ewideworldwouldlettheirchil
dgo
throughthatnever
Ishruggedmyshoulder
snobecausereal
l
y
whichparentwouldl
etherchi
ldbei
nthat
si
tuati
onwhent heyar
earound?
Khany
isowasgiv
ingmetighthugstocal
m me
downandfor
eheadki
sses,Ifi
nal
lycal
med
downandwipedmytear
saway
Khanyi
so:
I'
m sosadt
oheary
ourpastandt
hat
wouldnev
erchanget
hewayIseeyouokay
? 
Me:
OkayIunder
stand
Hewi
pedat
earwhi
chhadescapedf
rom my
ey
es
Khanyi
so:
Let
'sst
optal
kingaboutt
hepast
whichmadeusbothshedtear
s
Me:
Whendi
dyoushedat
ear
?
Khany
iso:
Didn'
t 
youseei
t?I
tescapedf
rom my
eyesr
eall
y!
Ilaughedathi
m becauseIknewt
hatwasaway
forhimtocheermeup
Me:Hahahashowmeev
idenceandIwi
l
lbel
i
eve
you
Khany
iso:
Att
hemoment
,Idonthav
eany
ev
idencebutIdi
dshedat
ear
Iwaslaughingactuallyhavingt het i
meofmy
l
ifewithKhanyiso,eventhoughIwast alki
ngt
o
hi
m, mymi ndwasel sewher et hinkingof
Nonzamebei ngmybi ol
ogical mot her.
Questi
onsonceagai nst art
edt ocircul
atemy
head,butIdidn'
thaveanycr azyi deasabout
Nonzame.ButIt houghtt omy self,Whywould
Nonzamel etDumani moscul ate/rapemebut
whenshewast oldthatIwasl eav i
ngshe
suddenlybecameal ov i
ng,car ingmot her?
 
Butwenev erknowhowt hebrai
nsofhuman
creatur
esoperate,t
odaytheywi
llbeful
lof
hatredanddarknessbuttomorr
owt heyar
e
l
ov i
ngandjoyful
! 
It
houghttomy sel
f,"
WasIliv
ingunderadark
cl
oudcreatedbyapersonwhowoul dnever
whatmet osuceedinli
fe?
" 
Relevantanswerswoul
dbematchedtot
hei
r
desir
edquestionsbutt
imewi
l
ltell
for
ev
ery
thi
ngt
obepl
acedont
het
abl
e.
.
..
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t23
AsIwassi t
tingal onewit
hKhany isohavi
ngt
he
ti
meofourl i
v esint hewardroom, myphone
star
tedri
ngingi twasanumbert hatIhav
e
neverseenbef oresoIpickeditup.
Me:
Hel
l
o
Cal
l
er:
HeySizi
it'
sAmangel
e,Ihear
dyouwher
e
i
nhospi
tal
. 
Thandazwamayhavet
oldherori
twaspar
tof
thenewsfeedgoi
ngar
ound
Me:
YesI
'
minhospi
tal
Her
:Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
 
Me:I
'mf
eeli
nggoodandmany
ouhav
ebeen
scar
cel
atel
y!
Her:
That
'sgood,
Ihav
ebeenhi
dingbehi
nd
cl
oseddoors
Me:Iunder
standf
ri
endbuty
oumustcomet
o
school
Her:
Iwil
lcomewhenIhav
egi
venbi
rt
hnotwhi
l
e
I
'm st
il
lyouknow
Me:Soy
ouar
egoi
ngt
owai
tunt
ily
our9mont
hs
ar
edue?
Her
:That'
stheonlyopt
ionIhave,Iwon'tst
and
bei
ngjudgedandlaughedatthatschoolsoI
wouldrat
herathome
Me:Youaresoundingli
kealunati
cdoy ouknow
that?Butnooff
enceifIwereyouIwouldbe
goingtoschoolf
rom MondaytoFridaynot
waiti
ngforthegoodspir
it
stofreeme
Her
:Si
ziy
oudon'
tunder
standmysi
tuat
ionokay
?
Me:
Makemeunder
standt
hen
Her
:Iwil
lbel
abell
edasaper
sonwhohasf al
l
en
f
rom theA-
Classl
evel
downtothepr
egnant
bi
tchl
evel
Me:That'
sy ourprobl
em!Yout hi
nkabouty
our
stat
usandsat isf
yingother
s.Thi
nkaboutfor
yoursel
fforoneokay ?
Her
:Yesmam Iwi
l
lthi
nkaboutmy
sel
fmor
e 
Me:
Excel
l
ent
Her:
Icansenset
hatyouaremuchbet
terf
rom
t
helectur
esyouaregi
vingme,
Ihavet
ogoand
f
reshenupformycheck-up
Me:
Okayt
alkl
ater
Her
:Lat
er
Wehungupatt hesameti
me, Khanyi
sowas
l
ookingatmeIwoul dsaydrooli
nginother
words.Thisguyknowshowt omakeaper son
hav
eanxi ous
Me:
Yint
oni
?(Whati
sit
?)
Khany
iso:I
t'
sjustt
hatyouar
ebeaut
if
ulandI
keepf
all
inghardforyougi
rl
Istar
tedblushi
ngandIlookedt
othesi
det
o
hidethatIwasblushi
ng
Me:Dude!St
opusi
ngt
hatcat
ch-
phr
aseIhav
e
hear
denoughofit
Khany
iso:
Why
?Doesi
tmakey
ougocr
azy
?!
Ofcourse,i
tdri
vesmecr
azybutIwoul
dnev
er
saythattohi
m
Me:No!I
twil
lbor
emetodeat
hthat
'
swhyy
ou
shoul
dstopusi
ngit
Khany
iso:
Arey
ouposi
ti
veaboutt
hat
?
Me:
110%posi
ti
ve
Khany
iso:
Sur
e,sur
e,sur
e?
Me:
Yeswhywoul
dn'
tIbe?
Khany
isost
art
edti
ckl
ingmeandIwasgi
ggl
i
ng
l
ikea3-y
earol
dtoddl
er.
 
Me:
Stop!Youar
eki
l
li
ngme
Khanyi
so:
Fir
stsay
,yourcatch-
phr
asei
snot
bori
ngandyoumayf or
everuseit
Me:Okay
!Okay
!Stopti
ckl
i
ngmesoIcanbe
abl
etosayi
tproper
ly
Hesl
owlyr
emov edhi
shandsandl ookedatme,
wai
ti
ngpat
ient
lytohearmerepeatwhathesaid
Me:
Yourcatch-
phrasei
snotbor
ingandy
ou
mayfor
everuseit
Khanyi
sost
art
edtol
i
ght
enupandpul
l
edout
hi
spinki
efi
nger
Khany
iso:
Pinki
e pr
omi
se?
Me:
Pinki
epr
omi
se
I
naspl itsecond,Ifoundmy sel
fwrappingmy
handaroundhi sneck.Enjoyi
ngthepleasur
eI'
m
gett
ingfrom hiskisses,
IbrokeitbecauseIwas
thi
nkinginmyhead.  
Whatifsomeoneenter
sandseesus?Even
worsewhatifBandi
l
ecomesinandseesus
r
ighti
naction?
Khany
iso:
Whati
sit
?
Hesoundedangr
yatsomepoi
ntormadatt
he
f
actIst
oppedhim
Me:
Thi
sfeel
swr
ong,
Ican'
tdoi
t
Khanyi
so:ComeonSi
zi
phi
we, wedi
dit
yest
erdaydidy
oucompl
ain?
Me:Noit
'sj
ustthatI
'
m concer
nedabout
someoneenter
ingandseesus 
Khanyi
so:
Fuckthem!Can'
tyouseetheburni
ng
l
ovewehav eforeachot
her
?Imeanki ssesj
ust
ri
sefr
om thebothofuswit
houtaski
ng! 
Me:
Iknowwehav
ethatki
ndofl
ovebutIcan'
t
doi
tli
kethi
s
Khanyi
so:Li
sten 
her
e,noonei
sgoi
ngt
oseeus
okay?Trustme
Inoddedandyetagainwegodownt hesame
road,hewentunderthegownIwaswear ing
from t
hehospit
altomyt hi
ghs.Asmuchof
discomfor
tIwasfeelingIcoul
dn'
tstophi
m, hi
s
toucheswerel
ikeli
tt
leAngelsmovingupand
downmyl
eg.
 
WasIf al
l
inghar
dforKhanyiso?Ashesai
d"t
he
burni
nglovewehaveforeachother
"doesi
t
real
lyexi
st?
 
Voi
ce:
Whatar
eyoudoi
ng?
Noitcan'
tbehim,mygutt ol
dmesomet hi
ng
wrongwouldhappen!ItwasBandi
le'
svoi
ce,
Khanyi
soquickl
ymov edawayfrom meand
st
oodnexttothechair
Bandi
l
e:Thi
siswhyheisal waysher
e?Soyou
cansmooch-smooch(
kiss)behi
ndmyback!
Khany
iso:
Nobhu-
Mybrothercutof
fKhany
isobef
orehecoul
d
f
ini
shtalki
ng
Bandi
l
e:Youkeepqui
etandgett
hehel
loutof
her
ebeforeIdosomethi
ngbad
Khanyi
sol
ookedatmeandmur mmeed" I
'm
sor
ry"t
henrushedof
ftogetoutoft
heward,
nowhehadleftmetoanswermybrother
's
har
dcor
equest
ional
one
Bandi
le:
Howcoulddothathuh?Af
terIhav
e
beenaski
ngyounicel
ynottogoaf
terboysbut
noyouhavedonetheopposit
e
Hesoundeddisappoi
ntedandIwasal
so
di
sapoi
ntedinmy sel
fforl
ett
ingmybr
other
downbydoingthatwithKhanyi
so
Me:I
tdidn'
tmeant
ohappen,
it'
sjustt
hatIgot
l
ostinhiswor
dsandI
'
m sorr
y
Bandi
l
e:Younglady,your
eal
lyl
etmedown.I
hadhi
ghhopesf oryouandsor
rywon'
tmend
whatj
usthappened,whenyouaredi
schar
ged
markyoursel
fgroundedf
or2months 
If
rownedmyf aceandlookedathi
m sohe
woul
datleastbreakdownthepuni
shment
Me:
Pleasebhut
idon'
tbel
i
ket
hat
Bandil
e:Mymindisalreadymadeup, youshoul
d
havethoughtaboutyouractionsandwhat
consequencestheywillbr
ing 
Ilaidmybackont hebedheadbutIalsoagree
withBandi l
ethatIdidwrongbybreaki
nghis
rules.Si
lencefi
ll
edtheroom andIwasn'tt
o
startaconv er
sati
onwithBandil
ebecausehe
wasst il
lmadatme.
Thedoct
orcamei
nwi
thahugesmi
l
eddr
awn
uponhi
sface
Doctor
:Afternoonguys,
Igotwonder
fulnewsf or
you.Si
ziphiwey ouar
egett
ingdi
schargedtoday
Me:
Today
?Cani
tbet
omor
rowpl
ease
Thedoct
orl
aughedandshookhi
sheadno
Me:
Man!(Isai
dthatbangi
ngmyhandacr
oss
t
hebed)
Doct
or:
Youcansi
gnt
her
eleasef
ormsf
orme
andyouar
edone
Me:
Youcangi
vei
ttomybr
other
,hewi
l
ldoi
t
Hehandedoverthefor
mstoBandi
l
eandhe
wassi
gningcountl
essti
mes
Doct
or:
Thanky
ousi
r,hav
eawonder
ful
dayby
e
Us:
Bye
Hewentoutt
her
oom andBandi
l
elookedatme
Bandi
le:
Yourcl
othesar
eint
hatbagandgoand
takeashower
Me:
Okay
Itookthebagandwentt othebat hr
oom, Itook
ashowert henloti
onedandIwor emycl othes
thatBandi
lehadcamewi th.If
ixedmyheadand
foll
owedbehi ndBandilewhowasal ready
standi
ngbyt hedoor ,wewentt ohi scarandI
l
oadedt hebagi nt
ot hebackseat .Iwentintothe
front
seatthenfastenedt heseatbeltand
Bandil
estartedtheengi nethendr oveofftoSea
Point.

*
***
Thedr i
vehomewasj ustboring, Imeant here
wasnoconv ersationsbetweenmeandBandi l
e
l
ikeweuset ohav e,onlytheradi owhi chwas
playi
ngHi p-Hopmusi cwast heonl ything
makingadi f
ferenceinthecar .Heopenedt he
gatewitht heremot eli
ketheot herresidents
whichliv
edi ntheapar tments, hepar kedhi scar
i
nt hegaraget hathadot hercar s. 
Itookmybagandmademywayupt hestairsto
theent ranceoft heapar t
ments.It ookthel i
ftto
theroom l eavingBandilebehindatt hepar king
l
ot ,
Ist ormedi nt
ot heapar t
menti twasmess
everythingwasont hef l
oorandIcar ed-
less
abouti t.Iwenttomyr oom andpl uggedmy
phonei nt
othechar gerwhi l
eIwentdownst air
s
tomakemy selfsomet hingtoeat .Ithenwentt o
watchRegul arShow, Ilovedthatshow
especial l
yMor decaiandRi gby.Ihear dBandi l
e
comi ngt owardst heli
vingandIj umpedupt o
thekitchen 
Bandi
l
e:Youcan'
ti
gnor
emef
orev
ersi
sthat
'
sa
f
act
Iwasn'
tmadathimi tjustt
hatthepuni
shment
hehadassignedf
ormewast oomuchnot hr
ee
muchf ormetohandle.YesIcanstayi
ndoor
s
butnotfort
hreemonths,Icoul
dn't
 
Me:
I'
m noti
gnor
ingy
oubr
a
Bandi
l
e:Thenwhati
sit
?
Ishookmyheadnoandr
insedmydi
shes 
Me:
Goodni
ghtbhut
i
Bandi
l
e:Soear
ly?
Me:
Yes,
themedi
cat
ioni
sst
art
ingt
oki
cki
n
Bandi
l
e:Okaygoodni
ght
Me:
Night
Idr
aggedmy sel
fupstai
rsandIwasr eal
l
yti
red,
Iwentt
omyr oom andchangedintomy
pyj
amas.Myphonest art
edri
ngi
ngandi twasa
vi
deocall
from ThandazwasoIpicked
Me:
Fri
endshi
p
Her
:HeyScoob,
howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
 
Me:
I'
m goodandI
'
m backhomeFl
uff
y
Her:
That'
sgoodIcouldn'
tcomevi
sity
ouat
hospi
tal
becauseyourBaconAndEggsasked
menottocome
Me:
Why
?
Her
:Hesai
dsomethi
ngaboutshowinghisl
ove
t
oyouanddoesn'
twantanyonetodist
urby
ou
t
wo
Ifoundmy selfgi
ggli
ngbecauseoft
heev
ent
s
thattookplacewithKhanyi
so 
Her
:Det
ail
s!Det
ail
s!
Itol
dherev
ery
thi
ngthathappenedbet
weenthe
twoofusandmyfri
endwasov erthemoom
Her:
Weddi
ngbel
l
sar
eri
ngi
ngl
eft
,ri
ghtand
cent
er 
Me:
Whatwoul
dyout
hinkwear
egoi
ngt
owed?
 
Her
:Idon'
tknowbuti
twi
l
lhappeni
nthenext
f
ewy
ear
smgani
(f
ri
end)wewi
l
lsee
Me:Getsomesl
eepf
ri
endseemsl
i
key
ouneed
i
t!
Her
:Youshoul
dgeti
tnotme!
Me:
Any
way
sgoodni
ght
Her
:Ni
ghtandIl
ovey
ou
Me:
Lov
eyoumor
e!
Ibl
ewaki ssacrossherdi
recti
onandsheblew
back,
Idisconnectedf
rom thecal
landt
ucked
i
ntobed.Ifi
nall
ydozedofftosleep.
.

*
***
Myphonewasr i
ngi
ngandIdidn'
tevenbot
her
tocheckt
hecall
eri
denti
ty.Whowouldwantt
o
dist
urbmypeacef
ulsl
eep?
Me:
Hel
l
o
Cal
l
er:
DidIwakey
ouup?
ItsoundedasKhanyi
so'
sv oi
ceandIt
hinkmy
heartski
ppedabeatbecauseIdi
dn'
thewoul
d
call
 
Me:
Yeswhatdoy
ouwant
?
Hi
m:Iwant
edt
ochecki
fyout
haty
ouar
eokay
Me:
YesI
'
mthanksf
orchecki
ng
Him:
Cool
nowgobackt
osl
eepandknowIl
ove
younomatt
erwhat
Me:
Il
ovey
out
oo 
IwasamazedthatIsai
dthatt
ohim butheyI
havet
oadmitIwasf al
l
inghar
dfort
heguy
Hi
m:Ni
ght
Me:
Night
Wehungupatt hesamet i
meaf terbl
owing
ki
ssesinthinairfr
om eachother'
sdirect
ion,I
tr
iedgetti
ngbackt osl
eepafterheari
nghis
voicebutthatseemedasmi ssi
oni mpossibl
e,
afterawhileIsl
ept.
.
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t24
Somethingwasawkwar dwithmysl eep,Iwas
sweati
ngandv er
yr estl
ess.Ifel
tsomeone
brushi
ngmyback, Islowlyopenedmyey esand
i
twasBandi l
ekeepingmecal m.Thatwasv er
y
weird,
li
kereal
lyweirdbecausenooneev er
doesthattomeespeci al
lywhenI '
m asleep
Me:
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngi
nmyr
oom?
Bandi
le:
Youwerecry
ingi
ny oursl
eep,
shout
ing
outwordst
hatIcoul
dn'
thear 
Me:
Whydi
dn'
tyouwakemeuporsomet
hing?
Bandi
l
e:Doy
out
hinkIdi
dn'
ttr
ythat
?
Ishr
uggedmyshoul
der
sandr
emov
edmy
sel
f
fr
om hi
sembrace
Me:
IwonderwhatwasIdr
eami
ngabout
?
It
racedupmyey
est
othewhi
tecei
l
ing
Bandi
le:
Ihopeit'
snotsomet
hingbador
anyt
hingthatunusual
 
Me:
Ihopesot
oo
Icheckedt
het
imeonmyphonei
twas
04:55am 
Bandi
l
e:Ar
eyougoi
ngt
oschool
?
Helookedatmewit
haconf
usedf
acebecauseI
wasstart
ingt
ofi
xmybed
Me:YesIneedt
o,Grade11isahugest
epi
n
hi
ghschoolsoIcan'
tmissanyt
hing
Bandil
e:That'
sgoody ouaret
hinki
ngabouty
our
fut
ureinsteadofthatKhanyi
soboy!
Di
dhereall
yneedtobr
ingupKhany
isoatt
his
t
imeofthemorni
ng?!
 
Me:
Real
l
y?Di
dyouhav
eto?
Bandi
le:I
t'
sjustt
hatIdon'twanty
outo
exper
ienceheart
-breakatthi
sageokay
?I'
m
onlyl
ookingoutforyoubecauseyouar
ethe
onl
ythi
ngIhavetosur
viv
einthiswor
ldnott
hat
Idon'
twannaseeyoudateany
one
Me:Iunder
standwher
eyouar
ecomi
ngf
rom
Bandz
Bandil
e:Thanksfort
hat
,rememberst
rai
ght
homeaf ter
schoolandy
ouarenotsupposet
o
usethatname!
Shoot!It
houghthehadf
orgotabouthi
m
groundi
ngme! 
Me:
Fine!
 
Heopenedmybedr oom doorandl ef
tmy
presencei nther oom, Istart
edt othi
nkhar d
aboutwhatIj ustdr eamn' taboutbutnothing
seemedt oflashback.Iwentt othebathroom
andbr ushedmyt eetht henItookawar m
shower ,Iwrappedat owel aroundmybodyand
Ithrewmy selfont opofmybed.  
Af
ter5minutesofl
ett
ingmymindgot
oit
's
bl
ankzone,Il
oti
onedandwor
emyschool
uni
formthenti
edmyhairintoaneatknot.I
wentdownstai
rs,
Itookoutabowlandpoured
Fut
ureLi
feandboil
ingwateri
ntoi
tthenstar
ted
eat
ing.
 
Wai t
ingf orBandi l
etocomedownbuti t
seemedhei stakingforever ,
Ipour edcoffee
i
ntomyf av ouri
tewhi chhadapi ctureofmeand
dad.It hinki twasmadewhenIwasi nthe
vil
laget omygener alknowl edgeabouti t,Itook
outmyphoneandl oggedont omyI nstagram
account[ Icreateditwitht hehelpofdear est
Thandazwaofcour se].Afterawhi le,Bandile
cameandIt ookmybagt henf oll
owedbehi nd
himt ot hecar .Sowegoti ntothecarandI
fastenedmyseat bl
et,aquest ioncamet omy
occupi edmi nd.Passingal lthequest i
onsIhad
spinningar oundmyhead.It houghtt omy self
"Whydon' tIaskBandi l
eaboutt hemi l
li
onr ands
i
nt hebank? "Butmyot herhalfthought" Doy ou
wantt omakey ourbrotherangr y?Thendon' t
askhi m"  
Therewereact uall
ytwoSiziphiwe'sinmyhead,
theli
kel
ytobedar e-
devi
lSiziphiweandt he
moreAngel Siziphi
wesoIdi dn'tknowwhi ch
onetofoll
ow!Whenhewasaboutt oreachmy
schoolandthecarwasf i
l
ledwi thsilencesoI
knewitwast her i
ghtti
met oask
Me:
Wher
edi
ddadgett
hemi
l
li
onst
hatheowns?
Bandi
lel
ookedatmewit
halookwhichwas
expr
essi
ng"Whatt
hehel
lar
ey out
alki
ng
about
?" 
Me:Youexact
lyknowI
'
mtal
ki
ngabout
!Pl
ease
don'
ttr
ytofoolme!
Bandi
le:
Hey!Idi
dn'
tsayany
thi
ngy
ouf
il
ledmy
mouthwithyourwor
dsnotme!
ItookadeepbreathinbecauseIknewIwas
goingtot
alknonsenseandwouldr eal
l
ypi
ss
Bandil
eoff
. 
Me:
Butyoudoknowwhatgav
ehi
m al
lthe
money
,don'
tyou?
Heconcent r
ateontheroadwhi l
ethi
nking
deepl
yhowt oanswermyquest i
on,Ididn'
twant
anystupi
danswer s!No,Ineededstr
aight
answers,Ineededtoknowwher eallt
hemoney
camef r
om
Bandi l
e:Dadhadownedamul t
ipl
ebusiness
acr ossthecountr
yandoutsidetheconti
nent,
hesi gnedthem overt
omeandy oubeforehe
diedbutwear egoingt oof
fi
cialownthem when
wear e25years.Areyousati
sfi
edwithyour
"elderl
yquesti
ons"? 
Ileanedbackont heseatwhil
ethinki
nghow
ri
chDadwas, buthenev ert
houghtofmebei ng
i
nt hatvi
ll
agewithoutanypropercareorcl
othes,
yeshedi dvi
sitmebutatleasthemayhav e
tookmewi thhim.Tearswerealreadymaking
theirwayoutofmyey es!
Bandi
l
e:Si
zi
phiwewhyar
eyoucr
ying?Di
dIsay
somethi
ngoff
ensi
ve?
Me:
Noi
t'
snoty
ou 
Ithoughttomysel
fthat"
Didt
hissocall
edman
'
Dad' r
eall
ycar
eaboutme?Didheev enknow
thatIwasevenmosculat
edathome?  
Idoagr ee,hedidleavemewithmoneybehi nd
butthatwoul dneverbeabletomendmy
brokensoul whichsoundedli
keagui tarpl
ayed
withbrokenst r
ingsanddidn'
tletoutany
musical t
unef r
om it.
Hef i
nal
lyreachedtheschoolgatesand
stoppedthecar,Bandi
legavemeat ighthug
andkeptsay i
ngnicewordstor ej
oicemyhear t
andtryi
ngtof i
xthebrokenpieces
Bandi
l
e:Wewi l
ltal
kaboutitwhenyoucome
backf
rom schoolandhere'
syourl
unchmoney
HehandedmeaR100not
eandsqueezedmy
handt
ight
ly
Me:
Okayby
e
Bandi
l
e:By
e
It
ookmybagandexi
tedt
hecart
henmademy
wayi ntot heschoolgr
ounds.IsawThandazwa
sitt
ingatt hebenchwithOlwet huandKhanyi
so
butIdidn' tknowwherethet hi
rdonewas.SoI
mademywayt othem,Thandazwacame
runningtomeandgav eatighthug.Shewas
l
iteral
lyhappyt oseemeal llookinggoodand
happyev enthoughbehindmysmi let
hewas
soul whichwasbi tt
er/
poisonous.  
Thandi
:
Fri
endshi
pIhopey
ouar
edoi
nggood!
 
Me:
I'
m act
ual
l
yov
ert
hemoonmyf
ri
end
Thandi
:
That
'sgoodmgani
Sheheldmyhandthenmadeourwayto
Khanyi
soandOlwethu,
Iex
changedhugswi
th
them 
Olwet
hu:
MrsPi
l
layy
oul
ooki
nghotev
ery
timeI
see
Didhej
ustcallmeMrsPil
l
ay?Okaysomethi
ng
wasupwiththese3andIneededt
ofindout
abouti
t
Me:
Whyam Isuddenl
yMr
sPi
l
lay
?
Khanyi
so:
It
'sj
ustt
hatIcanpi
ctur
emy sel
f
spendi
ngther
estofmylif
ewit
hy ou
Il
ookedatThandazwabecauseshewasthe
per
sonwhoisn'tcapabl
eofkeepi
ngasecret
Me:
Thandazwa?
!
Sheracedhert
humbsaroundandl
ookedatme
wit
houtgiv
ingaexpr
essi
on
Thandazwa:Okay!
 Okay
!Khanyi
sowaspl anning
totakeyououtonadat etoWater
front.I
twas
supposetobesomet hi
ngkeptasasecr etbut
youknowIcan'tbeabletokeepasecr et
.The
datewasgoingtobesor omanti
cIwasact uall
y
fal
li
ngforitt
hat'
swhyOl wet
huiscall
ingy ou
MrsPill
ay!Huh!
Shebreat
hedoutl oudbecauseshedidn'tev
en
pausetobreat
h!Andt heguyshadtheirhands
cover
ingt
heirfaces
Me:
Iknewsomet
hingwasupwi
tht
het
hreeof
y
oubutKhany
isower
eyougoi
ngt
odot
hat
?
Khanyi
so:
YesIwasbecauseIl
oveyouwithal
l
mineandifIl
osey
ou,Iwouldnev
errecov
er
Thisguywastal
kingasifweal
readyina
rel
ati
onshi
pthathasbeengoi
ngonf ory
ear
s
andyears.
Me:Dudeyouareonl
y18tobetell
i
ngmethat
i
sh!Okayit
'snotl
i
keI'
mthelastgi
rly
ouar
e
i
nterest
edin
Khanyisoj
ustl
ookedatmewi
that
ensel
ook
andletoutachuckl
e 
Olwethu:
Sizi
youarethel
astgi
rlf
orhim
becauseInevert
houghthewouldsaythatt
oa
gi
rl
Me:Butwemustl
ookf
orot
her
sbef
orewe
wouldset
tl
edown
Khany
iso:
Iknowbutgi
rly
ouhav
egotmyhear
t
Il
etoutagi
ggl
ejustt
othewayhewassay
ingi
t
Me:
Fine!Fi
ne!Butwemaydat
eoneday
Thandazwa:
Can'
t 
youst
artnow?Pl
easeguy
s
youwouldmakeacutecouple
Me:
Ther
eisnor
ushi
ntot
hisokay
?
Them:
Okay
Sil
encefi
l
ledourar
eaunt
ilThandazwabr
oke
theice
Thandazwa:Kaypeewhatdi
dyoumeant
hatday
wheny oucall
edmewhenSi zi
wasi
nhospi
tal
?
Khany
iso:
Whatdi
dIsay
?
Thandazwa:
"Youwantt
oshowy
ourl
ovet
o
Si
ziphi
we?
Khanyi
so:
ImeantIwanttobealonewithherto
expr
esstheloveIhav
eforher
!Wai t
,wait
,wait
whatdi
dy outhi
nkImeanyouhav edir
tyminds!
 
Weal
ll
aughedathi
m wi
thnocont
rol
Me:
Wedi
dn'
tsayany
thi
ngwhatar
eyout
hinki
ng?
Khany
iso:
Yout
hinki
ngIwant
edt
ohav
escr
ew
wi
thSi
zi
phi
we
Thandazwa:
Exact
ly!
 
Khany
iso:
Geezpeopl
e!Iwoul
dnev
erdot
hatt
o
her
Ol
wet
hu:
That
'sgoodmybr
other
 
Thebel
lrangf
ortheschoolt
oenterandwe
wentt
oassemblyforourcl
asses

*
***

Iwenttoclassandsatattheback,Iwenti
nto
myt hought
snotev enconcet
rat
ingonwhatthe
teacherwastal
kingabout.
WasNonzamemymot herorjustsomel
ady
whomar r
iedDadanddeci dedtotakemeasher
daught
er?Butthatwasfunnybecausemydad
wouldvi
sitme.
Ont
heot
hersi
deIt
houghti
twaswei
rdt
hatmy
dadMelusilef
tmealonewi t
hthatabusi
ve
womani nahousewi t
hnomor al
sandy esshe
di
dagr eatj
obofrai
singmebutt he
atmospherewasn'
tthatr
ight.
 
Voi
ce:
GetoutSi
zi
phi
we!
 
That'
swhenIreali
sedIwasnot i
cedthatIhad
beencaughtIwasn'tl
i
steni
ng.Il
ookedupi t
wastheteachernextt
ome 
Me:
Pleasemam!Iwi
l
lli
sten
Teacher
:No!Youarenotev
enintheri
ghtpage
andIwonttoler
atei
t.Nowgetout!
 
Idi
dn'
twanttoarguewit
hateacher
,It
ookmy
bagandwenttositbyt
hedoor.
 
ThebellrangforbreakandIwenttobuymy
regul
arlunchatthetuckshopcont
ainerand
Thandazwawasbehi ndme
Thandazwa:
Iseeyouwher
esatoutofcl
ass
whathappened?
Me:
Iwasi
ndeept
hought
ssoIwasn'
tl
ist
eni
ng
Thandazwa:
Oh?
Me:
Yep
Wewentt ositundert het reeandst art
edeat i
ng
whiletalkingaboutAmangel eandher
att
endanceofnotcomi ngt oschool,wewer e
notgossi pingaboutherwewer ejusttalki
ng.
Thedaywentbyf astt henThandazwaandI
partedway stocat chat axihome.WhenIgott o
theflatsIf el
tsleepyt henIwentt othe
apartmentandunl ockedt hedoor ,Iwent
str
aightt omyr oom andchangedi ntomy
casual shor t
sandv est .Irestedforawhi l
ethen
wentt omakemy selffoodf rom t
heki t
chenand
backt omyr oom.Ipl acedev eryt
hingIwoul d
needf ortheni ghtondr essingtable,If
elt
ashamedoff acingBandi l
eaf t
erthedramaIdi d
i
nt hemor ning.
 
Il
ockedthedoorandswi t
chedont het
elev i
son
whichwasfl
atscreenplacedonthewall,Idid
myhomewor kandate.Thetelev
isonstartedto
becomeabor
eonmesoIdeci
dedt
osl
eepi
t
out.

*
***

[
Dreami
ng]

I
tlookedli
keascary
,dar
khutwhichseemed
mayhav ebeeni
nthemiddl
eofnowhere.Iwas
t
ir
edupmymout h,
armsandlegs
Per
son:Di
dyour
eall
ythi
nky
ouwer
egoi
ngt
o
sur
viv
einthi
sworl
d?
Thewayhe/ shewassay i
ngitwasv er
y
dangerousandl ookedl
i
keasangoma
(t
radit
ionalhealer)whohadl ongdreadl
ocks
andbeadsar oundherhandsandneck.As
muchasIwant edtoanswernothingcould
comeoutofmymout hbutIwasjusttossi
ng
aroundtryi
ngt of r
eemy self
Person:
Nowy ouwil
ldi
efort
hesi
nsdonebyt
he
peopleyoul
ove!Haha 
Theperson'slaighwasv er
yinti
midatingnot
evenhav i
ngtheodesitytotryandfreeme.
He/shetookoutashar pbl
ade/razerandrai
sed
upmyt -shi
rtthenplacedtherazeronmyl ef
t
breast
.

[
Dreami
ngconcl
udes]

Iwokeupscreamingmyl ungsandtear
s
escapi
ngmyey es.Thi
sdream lef
tme
tr
aumatizedt
hinki
ngatthefactImaydie!
WasIgoi
ngtodi
e?Diditsymbol
i
seany
thi
ng
t
hatwasgoi
ngtohappeninmyli
fe?
 
Iwasreal
l
yconfusedIr
esor
tedt
oprayert
oget
mebacktomysensesbecauseIwasn'
t
thi
nki
ngstr
aight
!
Am Igoi
ngt
odie?Onl
ytheAl
mightymaygi
vea
cl
earpat
haboutmyupcomi
ngfutur
e.

.
..
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t25
Me:
No!No!Pl
easedon'
tki
l
lme 
Thatwasthef i
rstwordIsaidwhenIwokeup.
Whointheirri
ghteousli
fet
imewouldbother
havi
ngtokill
me?Inev erwrongedanyonenot
eventr
yingtocauseanyt y
peofpaintowards
them.
 
Icouldn'
tshakethedr eam of
fitkeptspinning
aroundmyheadwi ththeabanghappeni ngat
thedoor.Thatmademel ooklikeapshy copath,
Itookmybi gteddybearthatBandileboughtf or
meandhuggedi t.I
fitwasahumanbei ngt hei
r
wouldhavechokedt odeat hduetot hel
ossof
oxy
gent
hei
rmaybesuf
fer
ingf
rom.
 
Bandi
l
e:Si
zi
phi
weopent
hisf
reaki
n'door
! 
Ij
ustknewitwoul
dbehim becausenooneel
se
wasaroundint
heapar
tment
Me:
Iwantt
obel
eftal
one
Bandi
le:
Iwi
l
lbangont
hisdoorunt
ily
ouopen
upforme 
Li
keIsai
d,mybrothernev
ergiv
esupespeci
all
y
whensomethi
ngishappeningi
nfr
ontofhi
m he
woul
dnevergi
veup. 
Heconti
nuedbangi
ngont hedoorwhichwas
st
arti
ngtobecomeanuisanceuponme.Igot
uptoopenthedoorf
orhim wit
hmyl ungsf
il
led
wit
hanger
Bandi
le:
What'
supwit
hyou?Youwer
ecr
ying!I
coul
dhearyoufr
om myroom!
 
I
magine,myroom isthr
eeroomsawayfrom hi
s.
Soi
nactual
lysense,Iwasnotcry
ingnobutI
wasdefi
nat
elyscreamingoutl
oud. 
Isi
ghedoutwhi
l
eseati
ngonmyr
ocki
ngchai
r
goi
ngbackandfour
thoni
t
Me:Iwashavi
ngabaddream wher
eIwasti
ed
upandreadyt
obeslaught
eredi
ntopi
eceswi
th
arazor
Hejustf
rownedwithhiseyebr
owsr
aisedupas
i
fI'
mt el
l
ingafai
ryt
ailst
ory
Bandi
le:
Sizi
xol
ongokuxelelalentobutkukho
i
ntoeshayaamanzingay
e( Sizisor
rytotell
you
thi
sbutther
eissomethi
ngf i
shyabouty ou)
Whatthehel
l?Whywouldhesaysuchathi
ng?
ButIknowhemeantforgoodr
easonsnotf
or
badonesIhopeso!
 
Me:
Izobeit
het
hant
oni
kengokul
ont
o?(
What
's
t
hatsupposet
omean?)
Bandi
le:
Imeanthaty
oumaybeunderacurseof
wit
chesdonebysomeonewhohatesyou
Me:
Hat
e? 
Okay
!Thatt
ri
ggedmei
ntosomet
hingt
hatwas
complet
elyoutofthi
sworl
d!Itf
eltl
i
kemyey es
wereaboutpopoutastenni
sball
sthatwer
e
bei
ngmov edaround
Bandi
l
e:Letmerephr
asethat
,di
sli
key
ounot
hat
eit'
sjustacr
uelwor
d
Hellyeahitwas!Nowt hatgotmet hi
nkingto
my sel
f."Whowouldev entual
lywanttokil
lme?"
Ievenwentt omyt hi
nkingzonewher e
everyt
hingdidn'
tmakesenseal sothepeople
aroundme.Iev enforgotthatBandi
leandIhad
anunf i
nishedconver
sationthat
'swhenmy
thoughtsturnedi
ntomysl eep

PhoneRi
ngs
Istar
tedsearchi
ngf oritundermypil
l
owjust
fol
lowingthesoundf rom i
t'
sdir
ect
ionwit
hmy
hand.Igrabbeditthenanswerthecallwi
thout
checkingthecal
lerfir
st
Me:
Hel
l
o
Cal
ler:
Wherearey
ou?
!Youmi
ssedt
hree
per
iodsrunni
ng
ItsoundedasThandazwawi
thhersmal
lvoi
ce
shouti
ngatme
Me:Fr
iendIover
sleptsoIcoul
dn'
twakeup
whenthealar
mr ang
Her:
Iknowy
ouar
ely
ingev
ent
houghIcan'
tsee
you
Thosewer
ejustt
ruebenef
it
sofaf ri
endwho
knowswhenyouarel
yingevenoverthephone
whoyouwouldcal
labestfr
iend
Me:Okayfi
ne!YougotmeIdi
dn'
tfeel
li
ke
comingtoschool
Her
:Under
stood,
 
Icomel
ateront
ochecky
ou
Me:
Okayf
ri
end
Her
:By
e
Me:
Bye
Wehungatt
hesamet
imeandIqui
ckl
yrubbed
myey estogethersoIcanseet hephone
properl
ywhenIcheckedt hetimeitwasaround
11:45am.Ijustfel
tabi tboredbecauseI'
m
alr
eadyusedt oar outi
net hat
'sdi
ff
erentf
rom
theonethatwascur r
entlyhappeni
ng.
Youknowwheny ouareusedt
obeatschool
butnowyouarestucki
nyourbedwithnothi
ng
todoandyoukeepglanci
ngatyourphone. 
Itwasoff
ical
thatwast heboringdayofmyli
fe,
soIstoodandfixedmybedt henIwenttotake
awarm bathfi
ll
edwi t
hbubbles.Itookmy
headset
sthenrelaxedinthetub. 
Afteraf ewmi nutesorhour sItookat oweland
wr appeditar oundmybodyt henmademyway
tot hebedroom.Il ot
ionedandwor emycasual
clotheswi t
hsl ippersonmyf eet,Iwentdown
thest ai
rstomakemy sel
fbreakf astwhi
chwas
Engl i
shbreakf ast(eggs,bacon,toast,
worsand
bur ger)
.Idishedupf ormy selfandwentt oeat
whi lewatchingPower puffGirl
s(bestcar
toons
ev
ermade)onCar
toonNet
wor
k. 
Iquicklywentt owasht hedi shesandwentto
standont hebal cony,catchingthecoolsea
breezehitti
ngmyf aceinamagni fi
centwaythat
j
ustletev er
yt oxicfeel
ingsoutmybody .Iwent
tomyr oom t otakeanap, soIlaidonthebed.
Thedr eam camebackbuti twasmor escari
er
thanIimagi ned

[
DREAMI
NG]

Iwasnowunti
edatl
eastIcoul
dspeakt
othi
s
per
sonandaskwhyI'
m here
Me:Pl
easesetmefree,
ther
e'snothi
ngt
o
benef
itwhenyouki
l
l me*Shakenedvoi
ce*
Per
son:Dearther
e'smor
ethany
out
hinkt
her
e's
gol
dinsideofyou
Ij
ustf
eltt
ear
sgoi
ngdownmyey
es 
Per
son:
IfIdon'tki
l
lyou,
troubl
ewi
l
lcomemy
waysoIratherdoso
She/hetookoutanaxenowIwasr eall
yscar
ed,
Ist
oodupheadi ngfort
hedoorbutit
mysteri
ousl
yvanished
Per son:Baddeedswi ll
comey ourway ,nothing
youdowi llsuceed.Joyandhappinesswi l
l bea
l
imi tedthinginyourli
feall
youwi l
lfaceis
trauma, heart-
breakandIwishthatstay supon
forev erorunti
lyoudown.Nowt hecursemay
begi ntoconqueri nyourl
if
e
Me:
Pleasedon'
t!
Theaxewentst r
aighti
ntomyskull
andIwas
cutinhal
f,bloodsplatt
edever
ywhere.I
twas
brownandt urnedredinainst
ance!

[
DREAM ENDS]

Ij
umpedf
rom t
hebed,
Iwaswetasi
fwat
erhad
beenpouredonmybody .Istart
edcr yi
ngt othe
fact
sofwhatI '
veheardsaidbyt hi
s
sangoma(traditi
onalheal
er)aboutmyl i
fe.We
areoft
ent oldthatdreamshav emeani ngand
needtobei nteprer
tthem correctl
y,butinmy
caseIdidn'tevenknowwher et ostartsaying
whatmydr eam wasabout .

Wast hereacursedsummoneduponme?Am I
goi
ngt obet ur
nedtoacrazyper
sonunderthi
s
curse?Isthi
sdeclar
ed"cur
se"wil
lfor
everst
ay
uponmef oret
erni
ty?
 
Ihadtor
esul
ttopr
ayagai
nsoatl
eastImay
feel
goodspi
ri
tsar
oundmeforawhi
le.

.
..
.
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t26
Not hi
ngseemedt oworkallt
hatwaswor ki
ng
mewasj ustfr
ightandtearshappening.Itri
ed
allIcoul
dt ocalm downandhav eabi toffai
th
thatnothingwouldhappent ome, okayhours
passedandIwasundert hecomf ortofaper son
whoIwoul dcall
mydear estbestfri
end
Thandazwa.  
Sheusedwonder fulwordstokeepmyf ait
hup
from "Myfri
endnothi
ngi sgoingtohappento
youwi thourAl
mightylooki
ngaf tery
ou,t
o"It
wasj ustabaddream andev ery
oneexperi
ences
those" 
Yes,IknowIwasdreamingbuti
thadtobe
att
endedbyorpri
estorsomethi
ng.Iwon'
tbe
abl
et ocar
ryonr
eplayi
ngtheeventwer
eI'
m
ki
ll
ed. 
Me:Ai
n'
tyouhungr
y?Youbeenher
ethewhol
e
day
Thandazwa:
Mor ethanhungryIwoul
deata
wholecowifthatwaspossible
Me:
Letmegoandmakesomet
hingt
oeat
Istoodupandwor emyf l
ipf
lopsthenstar
ted
walkingtotheki
tchen.Idrankaglassofwater
andst ar
tedmakingscrambl edeggsformeand
Thandazwa.Idishedupf orthebothofusand
tookherplatet
oheri ntheli
v i
ngroom
Thandazwa:
ThanksScoob
Shetookt
hepl
atewi
thhereyesgluedto
Keepi
ngUpWit
hTheKardashiansontel
evi
sion
Me:
Youandt
hisr
eal
i
tyshows!
 
Isaidt
hatwi
thachucklegoi
ngoutaswel
l,she
tr
acedherey
estomyf acewit
hasmiledr
awn
also
Thandazwa:
That
'
smemgani
Ilaughedatherandwentt othekitchentotake
mypl ateandjoi
nedThandazwaont hesofa.We
wer ehavi
ngagoodl aughatleastthedeadly
eventsthathavebeenhappeningint hepast
fewday swerestar
tingtodisappearjustali
tt
le
notal
loft
hem.
 
Thandazwa:
Fri
endIbroughtsomehomewor
k
fr
om school
foryoutocompl et
e
Real
lydi
dshehaveto?Iknowshehelpingout
butIwasn'
ti
nthemoodt odoanythi
ng.Buthey
Ihadtoactt
hankf
ultoheryouknow
Me:
Thanksf
ri
endIappr
eci
atet
hat
Thandazwa:
Any
thi
ngf
ory
oumgani
.
.Ihav
e
somebeanstospi
l
l
Me:
Spi
l
lmyf
ri
end 
Herfaci
alexpr
essi
onchangedassoonasshe
heardmesaythatfr
om bei
ng"okay
"to
"happi
nessisi
ntheair
"
Thandazwa:Okay!
 WhenIwascomingt
oy our
apart
mentsIbumpedi nt
othisguy
,myfri
end
he'
sistodieforbutsomethi
ngwasoff
ish 
That'
sthefi
rstIhear
dfr
om hersayi
ngaguy
wasof f
isht
oherbecauseever
yguyisperf
ect
forherwhet
heritwasaseri
alki
ll
erorwhat
Me:
Whatdoy
oumeanof
fi
sh?
Istr
etchedmysel
ftoputtheremot
eont he
coffeetabl
esoIcoul
dli
stenatt
ent
ivel
ytomy
fr
iend
Thandazwa:Imeanthatheseemshehasnov a-
va-v
oom li
keanyguys.Heseemsup-t
ightand
l
ikeshimsel
fmor et
hanothers
Me:I
fIwasther
etoseehi
m,di
dyouexchange
numbers?
Shenoddedy esandtookoutherphonethen
star
tedpr essi
ngonit.Iwasnotsureabout
whatshemeantt hi
s'guy'
wasoffishbecause
shedidn'texplai
nfur
therthanIt
houghtshe
would. 
Thedaywasst ar
ti
ngt ogetbett
ereachmi nute,
Ithi
nkitwasbecauseofThandazwaar ound
andshewoul dgotoapoi ntwereshemademy
cheekshurtt
othecor e.Sowest ar
tedwitht he
homewor kandfi
nishedafter3hours,soIt ook
myt ex
tbookstomyr oom andcamet osi tnext
t
oThandi
whowaspacki
ngt
ogohome
Me:
Alr
eadyl
eav
ing?
Thandazwa:YesIneedt
ogoandpr epare
supperformymom becauseourhelperi
snot
aroundfort
woweeks
Me:Oh?Can'ty
ouor
dert
ake-
awaysor
somethingt
owhatyoul
ookl
ike,
youwi
ll
bur
n
thepots
Shest
artedanaly
singher
sel
fwhi
lel
ooki
ngat
themi
rrorwhichwasbythedoor
Thandazwa:
Ther
e'snot
hingwr
ongaboutme
okay?
Me:
Wewi
l
lsee
Shetookherbagandot herbel
ongingsand
headedfort
hedoorwi thmebehi ndher,I
l
ockedthedoor.I
twasaFr i
dayaft
ernoonso
mostofthefl
at'
sr esi
dent swerebackfrom
workandschool,sowewentdownt othe
groundf
loorwit
ht heelevatori
nthemeant ime
Thandazwawascal
l
inghersi
stert
opi
ckher
up.
 
Thandazwa:
Fri
enddon'
tyouwantt
ohave
di
nneratmyhouse?Imeanyourbr
otherwi
l
l
underst
and
Me:Towhathappenedaf ewweeksago?He
wouldneverbecauseIbr
okehi
strustaboutmy
whereabout
s 
Thandazwaj ustnoddedwi thdisappointment
wri
ttenal
l overherfacebutt hatwasal sopar
t
ofthepunishmentbyki ssingKhany iso.Sowe
exi
tedtheapar t
ment '
sgroundandt herewasa
whiteToyotaCoroll
ast andingoutside 
Thandazwa:That
'
smysist
erI
mkhi
thacomeand
sayhi.Shealway
swant
edtoseey
ou
Oh?IguessThandazwat
alksaboutmewithher
famil
y?Butthat
'
swhatwedowi t
hourfr
iends,
ain'
tIr
ight
? 
Sot
hisav
erage-
hei
ght
edwoman/
gir
lcameout
ofthecarwearingapl um penci
lski
rtwitha
bl
ackblazerandapl atfor
m heel,
whol ookeda
l
otlikeThandazwaev enthewayt hei
rare
str
ucturedi
ssimilar
.Shemadeourwayt ous
andopenedherar msi nfrontofmeforahug
andIhuggedher
I
mkhi
tha:
Letmeguessy
ouar
eSi
zi
phi
we?
Inoddedwi
thasmi
l
eonmyf
ace
I
mkhitha:
Ihear
dalotaboutyoufr
om
Thandazwaandyouarebeauti
ful
Me:
Thanky
ousi
si
Isai
dthatlooki
ngdownbecauseofbei
ngshy
whil
etal
kingtoImkhi
tha
I
mkhi
tha:
She'
sshyi
sn'
ti
t?
Thandazwa:
From t
hedayIsawheratt
hemal
l
,
fr
iendl
etmegohomeandIwi ll
seeyouon
Monday 
Me:
Byefr
iendandby
esi
s'
Imkhi
thani
ce
meet
ingy
ou
I
mkhi
tha:
It
'sal
way
sapl
easur
edearby
e
Me:
Bye
Theywenti nsi
dethecarandshedr i
veoffwhile
hooti
ngatme, Iwavedatt hem andmademy
wayintotheapartment.It
ookoutmykey sto
unl
ockthedoorbuti tseemeditwasal r
eady
opened.Ihadtobecool evenifther
e'sarobber
i
nsideIjusthadto.
Wi t
hmehear ingthebeatofmyhear tthrough
myear smademat t
ersev enmor edramat icalso
thesoundofdi sheshi t
ti
ngeachot her.Itooka
golfracketf rom theonesst andi
ngbyt hedoor
andf oll
owedt hesounds, theywerecomi ng
from theki t
chenandhel l wasaboutt obr eak
l
oose.I twasamal ebodyandIwasr eadyt o
attacklikeahungr yshar kfrom beneatht he
shadywat ers,Iraisedther acketandhet ur ned
aroundi twasBandi l
ewhoj ustf
rozeseei ngme
i
nt hatway
Bandi
l
e:Pl
easedon'
tki
l
l!
Idr
oppedt
her
acketont
hef
loorandhugged
hi
m
Me:
Don'tev
erdothatagai
n,doy
ouwantt
o
meety
ourancest
ors?
Bandi
l
e:NoI
'
mtooy
oung 
Ididn'
tseehim ent
ertheapar
tmentsbecause
heusedt heot
herentrancewhi
chwasont he
othersi
de.Hewaspr epari
ngsupperf
orthetwo
ofus
Bandi
l
e:Di
dtheyv
isi
tagai
n?
Isi
ghedandl
ookedathi
m 
Me:
Theywer
ewor
se
Bandi
l
e:Whathappened?
It
oldhi
m every
thi
ngconcer
ningt
hedr
eam and
hi
sjawdropped
Bandil
e:Wemustgoandconsul
taheal
eror
pri
estbefor
ethi
ngsgooutofhand
Me:
Iwasal
sot
hinki
ngoft
hesamet
hing
Bandi
l
e:Andwewi
l
lbet
hef
ir
stonest
omor
row
morni
ng!
Ihadabi toffearofgoi
ngt
oahealerwhil
ston
theothersideahealeri
ski
l
li
ngmeandonce
againcrazyquesti
onscameagai
n.Ithoughtt
o
my sel
f,
 
Whatift
hisi
st hesameper sonwhoisinmy
dream?Ever
ythinghappensincoinci
depeopl
e
andweneedt obecarefuloutther
e. 
SoBandi
ledi
shedupandwewentt oeati
nthe
si
tt
ingr
oom whil
ewat chi
ngtel
evi
sion,
Iwashed
di
sheswhenwef i
nishedeat
ing
Bandi
l
e:Sowhatdoy
out
hinkaboutwhatIsai
d?
Me:
Wecangot
otheheal
erj
ustt
ofi
ndout
Bandi
l
e:Okayby11:
45am wemustgo
Me:
Sur
ewewi
l
l
Bandi
l
e:Ni
ghtScoobsI
'
m goi
ngt
osl
eep 
Me:
At20:
05pm?Ar
eyousur
e?
Bandi
l
e:I
'
mti
redsi
sfr
om al
lthewor
k 
Me:
OkayBandzni
ght
Bandi
l
e:Whatdi
dIsayaboutt
hatname?
Il
etoutal
augh
Me:
Goodni
ghtabut
inowgo
Hel ef
tmeinthekitchenwi thmy sel
fandI
fi
nishedwashi
ngt hedi shesthenIwenttomy
room towashtel
ev i
sion.AfterIwhil
eInoticed
mybodywasshut tingdownonmeal ert
ingme
thatImustgetsomer estsoIchangedintomy
pyjamasandtuckedint obed.

[
SATURDAYMORNI
NG]

Lucki
lyther
ewer enodream fr
om theprevi
ous
night
,whichmademesl eeppeacef
ull
yandat
l
eastIwasabletor est
.SoIfli
ppedmy sel
fint
o
theotherposi
ti
ontogetmyphone, Ihad5
notifi
cati
onsf r
om What sAppandI nstagram.So
Ipagedt hroughmyI nst agram andFacebook
account stogetadozeofgoodnewst hatwer e
goingv i
ralontheInternet .Afterafewmi nutes,I
wentt otakeawar m showerandIl otionedaf ter
that.Iwor emymaxi ski rtandl ongsleev evest
thenputadoekonmyheadal sopumpsonmy
feet,Iquickl
ymademywaydownst air
sand
madesomeRi ceKri
spi es.Ilistenedtot hem
popandt hosewerebeaut if
ul tunestomyear s,
Bandi l
ecamewear i
nghi sNikeCapi ntheright
dir
ect i
onnotbackwar ds.  
Bandi
l
e:Mor
ning 
sis
Iwavedathim becausemymouthwasfi
ll
ed
wit
hthecereal
.Heal sopour
edcer
eal
int
ohis
bowlandstart
edeating
Me:
Shoul
dn'
twebeont
heway
?
Bandi
l
e:Justgi
veme5mi
nut
est
henwewi
l
lgo
Me:
Okay
 
Iri
nsedmyourdi
sheswhil
ehehadrushed
upstai
rst
ogethi
scarkey
s/wal
l
et.
 
Bandi
l
e:Let
'shi
tther
oad!
Ifoll
owedbehindhimt ot
hecar,wegotinand
strappedourseat
belt
s.Hestar
tedtheengi
ne
anddr oveof
fjoi
ningtheMai
nRoad
.

Goingt ot hi
spl acewasjustver
yf ar,Iwoul
d
press"SeekTr ack"becauseIwasget t
ingt
ired
ofBandi ledeephouse.Sohest oppedi nfr
ont
ofthisdodgypl acewhichhadashackout ,he
parkedt hecarandwegotof f.Het ookouthi s
handf ormet ohol dontoandIdid, wewent
i
nsideandgr eet edthepeopl
e.
Wesatforaboutanhourorsoandwewer
e
cal
l
edin.
Okay
!Myfir
stexpr
essi
onwasj
ustshi
tthi
sis
socr
eepy
!Imeanthesmell
ofbur
nttr
adit
ional
medici
newasjusthorr
ibl
eandtheneckl
aces
thatwer
ehangi
ngf r
om thecei
l
ingsowesat
down. 
Heal
er:
Iseeadar
kcl
oudov
ery
oumygi
rl
!Ahh!
!
Hewasf
li
ppi
nghi
saf
eat
herdustorwhat
everi
t
i
s. 
Me:
Ntat
e(Si
r)whatdoy
oumean?
Heal
er:Youar ecur
sedmychi l
d,ancestor
sf rom
acert
aincl anaremadatyourfatherandtheir
shi
ft
edi ttoyouafterhedi
ed.Nothingwil
l help
youevent hemost
powerf
ul nsangoma(tr
adi
ti
onalhealer
)inthi
worl
dwoul dhelpy
ou
Me:
Eveni
fyougi
vemesomet
hingt
ocl
eanse?
Tear
swer
eal
readybei
ngat
hreati
nmyey
es 
Heal
er:
Sadl
ymychild,
Ican'
tfi
ndanyt
hingto
hel
pit
'sacurset
hatwil
lst
ayuponyouforev
er
WhatdidIeverdotodeserv
ethisl
if
e?Ithi
nk
I
'
m beingpunishedf
orotherpeopl
esins!
Nothingcanhel
pme, am Igoingtoev
erl
i
vea
l
if
et hatIal
wayspi
cturedmy sel
f
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t27
[
BANDI
LE]
Itwasj usthear t
breakingseeingmysi ster
(Sizi
phiwe)int hatstate,especiall
ywhenI
couldn'tdoany t
hingtohelpher .Fait
hi nme
startedtocutshor tduetothef actwedi dn't
findanyexpl ainati
onofsomesor tli
nkingto
whatmayhav ecausedt hecurseonher ,Iwas
comf ortingSizibutitwassopai nfult
hatmy
ey eswer estarti
ngt otearupbutIhadt obe
strongf orher
Si
zi
phiwe:
Thi
i
s h-
haa-
ssNonzamewr
it
tenal
l
ov
erit
AsmuchasIwantedt oagreewithherbutI
coul
dn'
tj
ustt
odisrespectanelderevenifshe'
s
notaround.IknowNonzamehadhurtSizi
phi
we
butIcouldn'
talsobesay
ing"
Yes,yesshe'
sthe
onewhol aidthecur
seuponyou"
.
SoIactedl
ikeacomplet
eidiott
hatknew
not
hingaboutwhatwasgoingon
Me:
Whatwoul
dmakey
ousayt
hat
? 
Sheremovedher
selffr
om myar
mswhil
e
wipi
ngawayhertearswhi
chwer
econst
ant
ly
pour
ingout
Si
ziphi
we:
Idon'
thaveagoodreasoncur
rent
ly
butmygutkeepstel
l
ingmeit
'sher
Me:Si
ziphi
weit'
snotri
ghtt
obepoint
ingfi
ngers
andblamingpeopl
e,youmusthav
eprooftosay
apersondidsomethi
ngtoyou
Si
zi
phi
we:
IknowbutIt
hinki
thasherwr
it
tenal
l
ov
er
Iwasgett
ingboredofthstopicaboutNonzame
soIdeci
dedtoturnonMi casaxHeav enl
ySent
andtur
nedupthev ol
ume
Me:Let
'
stakeabreakfr
om al
lthewor
ld'
s
pr
oblems,wher
edoy ouwannagoto?
Il
ookedatSizi
phiwe.Iwant
edt
omakemy
si
sterhappyal
lti
mesandIcoul
dn'
tbar
eseei
ng
hersad 
Sizi
phi
we:(
Smil
i
ng)Iwast
hinki
ngofWat
erf
ront
becauseIal
waysl
ongedt
ogot her
e
Thesmilet hatwasdrawnonherfacejust
meltedall
t heicei
nmyhear t
,shewasmor e
thanasistertomel i
ter
all
ymydaughter
becauseIst aywit
hher24/7butnotallt
he
ti
me. 
Me:
Okayl
et'
sgo 
Ist
artedthecaranddr ov
eof ftoV&A
Waterfr
ontwit
hmyl i
tt
lesist
er,thedr
ivewas
qui
tegood.Shewascommuni cati
nganddidn'
t
bott
leanyfeel
ings,shewasf reeandspeaki
ng
hermindassheal waysdoes. 
Me:
Sot
ell
meaboutt
hisKhany
iso?
 
Shelookedatmeindi
sbel
i
efwi
thherf
ace
sayi
ng,"Whatt
hehel
l?
" 
Si
zi
phi
we:
Wear
ejustf
ri
endsnot
hingmor
e
Iknewshewasl
yi
ngbyt
hewayshequi
ckl
y
answer
edme
Me:Youneedt obehonestwit
hme,takemeas
yoursi
ster,
brotheret
cbecausewearest
uck
t
ogetherforev
er
Si
zi
phiwe:
Idotakey
ouasthatbuthonest
ly
not
hingi
sgoingonbet
weenKhanyisoandI
Me:
Yoursmi
leexpl
ainev
eryt
hingandIwon'
t
r
estt
il
lyout
ell
mewhat '
sgoi
ngon
Si
ziphi
we:Okayfi
ne!It
hinkI
'
m cr
ushi
nghar
don
hi
m butIcan'tr
esi
stit
!
Iremovedmyhandsf
rom t
hest
eer
ingwheel
andclappedt
hem 
Me:Iknewitbutpl
easedon'
trushi
ntoa
r
elati
onshi
pwi t
hhim
Si
zi
phi
we:
That
'swhatIt
oldhi
m al
so.
Si
ziphi
we'sphonest
art
edr
ingi
ngandshe
pi
ckeditup
Her
:Wher
e?
.
..
Her
:Wi
thwho?
.
.
Her
:I
'm al
sogoi
ngt
her
ewi
thmybr
other
.
.
Her
:Seey
ousoon
Siziphi
wer emov
edthephonefrom herearandI
thinksheheardgoodnewsfrom herphonecall
,
shel ookedatmewithpuppyeyes
Me:
Whatdoy
ouwant
?
Si
zi
phiwe:
Myfr
iendsar
eatWat
erf
rontsocanI
goandmeetupwitht
hem?
Me:
Sur
eift
heyar
eal
lther
eyoucan
Si
zi
phi
we:
Youar
ethebest
! 
Sheki
ssedmycheekandIdr
ovetoWater
front
wit
hmysist
erf
inger
sgluedt
oherphone.

•
•
[
SIZI
PHI
WE]
Theconsul t
ati
ontothetradit
ionalheal
ermade
mattersevenmor edramaticbecauseIcouldn'
t
fi
ndtheanswer sIwaslookingf or
.Buthavi
ng
thegreatestsuppor
terwhowasBandi l
emade
ever
y t
hinggosmoot hatleastthepaindazzled
away. 
Ir
ecei
vedaphonecal
lfr
om Khany
iso
Me:
Hel
l
o
Hi
m:Heybabewher
ear
eyou?
Me:
Headi
ngt
oWat
erf
rontandy
ou?
Hi
m:Wat
erf
rontcanwemeetup,
Ineedt
otal
k
t
oyou
Me:
Sur
eIwi
l
ltel
lyouwhenIhav
ear
ri
ved
Hi
m:Seey
ou
Me:
Seey
ou
Wehungupatthesametime,
Bandi
l
ehad
al
readypar
kedhi
scarandwegot
Me:
CanIgoandmeetmyf
ri
end?
Bandi
le:
Ift
heyareherey
oucango,
justgi
veme
acall
wheny ouaredone
Me:
Thanks
Wewentourseper at eways.Itwasmyf i
rstin
V&AWat erf
ront,Iwassoexci tedthatIcouldn't
hol
dbackmyexci t
ementoft hepl
acesoI
cal
ledKhanyisoandt oldhim Iwasthere.After
waiti
ngfor2mi nutes,Ifel
tthesewarml i
ps
pushthei
rwayagai nstmyneckandar ms
gett
ingwrappedar oundmybody ,
tomysupr ise
i
twasKhany iso 
Me:
Youal
lmostgav
emeahear
tat
tack 
Khany
iso:
Sor
ryhey
,howar
eyou?
Me:
I'
m goodt
hanksandy
ou?
Khanyiso:
I'
m good,Ineedtobli
ndfol
dy ou
becausethereissomethingawait
ingforyou
Me:
Shoul
dIbescar
ed?
Khany
iso:
Nopei
t'
shar
mless 
Me:
Okay
Hecov er
edmyey eswi t
haneyemaskandt ook
myhandf orassi
stance.WewalkedandIfelt
thatIwasgett
ingintosomet
hingthatwas
unusual
Me:
Wher
ear
ewegoi
ng?
Khany
iso:
Justwai
tandsee
Wefi
nall
ystoppedandhet ookofft
hemask,I
di
dn'
texceptanyt
hingphenominall
i
ket
his.
 
Joyandbut
ter
fl
iest
ookovermybodyandIwas
feel
i
ngover
whelmedbyev
er y
thi
ng,
Icoul
dn'
t
bel
i
eveinami l
l
ionyear
sthatKhanyi
sowoul
d
dothi
sforme.Imeanwear einhi
ghschool
so
hecan'
taff
ordall
thi
s! 
•
•
[
KHANYI
SO]
Yes, I
'
m wel lknownasaf l
ippi
ngpl ayboybut
ev ersinceIlaidmyey esonSiziphiwe,IknewI
neededt ochangef ast
.Shewasv erydif
ferent
from al lt
hegi r
lsfrom schoolandguy swoul d
l
iter al
lykil
lforthatgirl
,noonehasev erknown
thatIal solearntol oveapersonandi nsiston
doi ngitperfectl
y. 
Ireal
lywantedtochangeforSizi
phi
weandI
alr
eadypict
uredmy sel
fmarryi
ngheroneday,I
knowwear eabouttofini
shhighschoolbut
thatdoesn'
tmeanIcan'tpi
cturemyself
spendingmylif
ewithher.
 
Ihadaskedmyol
derbr
otherAy
abongat
obook
usay achtsot hatIcoul dhav eapi cni
cwi th
Sizi
phiwewi thjustt he2ofuswhi lemov ing
aroundoceanwat er.Iwentthroughhel lt
oget
mybr othertoagr eebooki ngthey acht.Yes, he
knewaboutt hebur ningloveforSiziphiwebutI
wasst i
llafr
aidofherbi gbrotherBandi l
et hat
guyisscar eandi sdef i
natel
ynott heguyt o
messwi t
h. 
Ir
emov edthebl
i
ndf
oldfr
om herey
esandshe
l
ookedamazedordeli
ght
edofwhatherey
es
wereseei
ng
Me:
Youl
i
ke?
Isai
dthatwi
thasmileonmyf
aceandshe
seemedspeechl
ess
Sizi
phi
we:
Shockedactual
l
y!Wher
edi
dyouget
themoneyforal
lthi
s?
Me:
Thatdoesn'
tmat
ter
,al
lthatmat
ter
sist
hat
wearet
ogether
Si
zi
phi
we:
Thi
sissol
ovel
y!
 
Me:
ThanksandIdecor
atedi
tal
lj
ustf
ory
ou
Shel
ookedatmedi
sbel
i
efandshookherhead
no
Me:
Real
l
y!Idi
d
Si
zi
phi
we:
Iwonder
It
ookherhandandwewenttost
andbythe
st
air
casewhichl
edt
othedeckofthey
achtand
westar
tedtal
ki
ng
Me:
Iboughtsomef
ood
Si
zi
phi
we:
Cool
Ineedt
oeatI
'
m sohungr
y! 
Me:
Youandf
ood!
Iletoutachuckl esowewentt oeat,Inoti
ced
thatwewer eal
readysuckingoneachot her
s
l
ips.Theki ssfr
om mypoi ntofviewwasv ery
passionatebutIdon'tknowf r
om Sizi
phiweside.
Ast heheatincreased,Isl
i
ppedmyhandunder
herskirtandshej umpedupal it
tlet
henpulled
outoftheki ss
Si
zi
phi
we:
Ican'
tdot
his
Me:I
'
m sorrybabeIdi
dn'
tmeant
obr
ingback
anyfl
ashbacks
Shepull
edasmilef
rom t
heside.I
twaswr ong
ofmebecauseshehasn'
thealedpr
operl
yf r
om
al
lthetr
aumashefacedcreat
edint
opieceby
herst
epfat
her
. 
Thedaywentbywi t
hSizi
phiwei twasquit
e
goodinfactandweenj oyedeachot her
s
company .Al
lthatIwasthinki
ngi nmyheadis
that
,"CanIeverchangeforSiziphiweandbethe
ri
ghteousboyfri
endforher?" 
ImeanIdon' twanttohurtheri
nanywayorI
mayl oseherforever
,Iwaswalki
ngonthini
ce
withthereputat
ionIhavebutIknewwith
Sizi
phiweeveryt
hingwouldbepossibl
eto
accomplish.
 
Don'
tyouagr
ee?BecauseIdobel
i
evet
hatIcan
al
sochangeandbeagoodguy
.
..
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t28
[
SIZI
PHI
WE]
Thedat ewithKhany i
soi fIcouldputi tt
hatway
becausei twasjustthet woofus, i
twasbey ond
wor dsi twaslovelyandr omant icatthesame
ti
me, eventhoughIdi dn'tknowwher ehegot
themoneyf r
om.Andy es, If
inall
yagreedtobe
hisgir l
fri
endbutIknewi twoul dcomewi th
unex pectedchallengesi fImaysay ,wewer e
goingt okeepi tasecr etforawhi l
e. 
Bandi
leandIwentbackhomewi thsomet hi
ng
amazi
nghappeni ngbet
weenus, Idon'tknowit
waseitherhi
m ormewewer ej
ustr evi
vedI'
m
sur
eitwast hegospelmusicwewer el
ist
eni
ng
towhencomi ngbackfrom Wat
erfront.Sowe
gotint
ot heapart
mentandhedi shedoutour
take-
away sandwest art
edeati
ngwhile
watchingGenerat
ions,Iswal
lowedthefood
whichwasi nm
Me:
Bhut
idoy
ouhaveanyi
deawhyDadwoul
d
l
eav
esomuchmoneybehi
nd?
Helookedatmewi
thaconf
usedf
aceorr
ather
quest
ioni
ngone
Bandi
l
e:It
hinkitwast
osecureourf
utur
eand
wewon'tgoaroundaski
ngpeopl
eformoney
Me:Oh?Butwhatmakesmeabi tconfusedi
s
thathel
eftmebehindi
ntheEaster
nCapewhi l
e
hewasinNorther
nCapeorwhereverhewas
andheknewIneededgoodeducation
Bandil
e:Mydearestsi
ster,t
otellyouthetrut
his
thatIdon'
thaveanyexpl ai
nat
ionstoallyour
questi
onbutwhatI '
m sureofisthat,
Dadhada
safeinhishousewhichwasi nTy ger
burgthat
herepremandedthatitshouldbeopenedby
youwheny ouaremat uredenoughttohandleall
ofi
t
Asafei
nhishouse?Whatcouldbeinit?Alett
er,
money?Thosewerejustquest
ionsf
lowing
ar
oundmyhead, pr
ettymuchtherewasso
muchthatneededt
ober eveal
edaboutmyl i
fe
Me:
Canwegoandchecki
toutt
omor
rowor
?
Ihadt oseewhatwasi nt
hatsafewhet
herI
'
m
mat uredornot
,thatwasthel
eastofmy
problemsthatIhadtoworryabout
Bandi
le:
Areyoumatur
edoremoti
onalstr
ong?I
can'
thaveyoubei
ngamessinthathouseokay
?
Me:Icantakeonanythi
ng, I
'
m astr
ong,br
ave
andcourageousgir
landy esI'
m matur
ed
enoughtofindoutanyt
hing
Bandi
le:
Thent
omor
rowwewi
l
lbeonourwayt
o
Tyger
burg
Me:
Cool
.
Ineededtoknowany
thi
ngt hatl
inkedt
omejust
tofi
lli
nquesti
onswi
thmissinganswerst
o
them,t
heirmaybet imeswher eIjustfeelweak
andIcan'
tstandtof aceanyt r
oublecomi ngmy
waybutthiswasjustonet estmakingit'
sway
tomeandIhadt or espondt oit
,eveniftears
andhatr
edmayr ise.Icamebackt omysenses
whenBandileshookedmet hat'
swhenInot iced
Iwasn'
tli
steni
ngtoany thi
nghehadsai d
Bandi
l
e:Ar
eyouokay
?
Me:
Yeswhywoul
dn'
tIbe?
Bandil
e:Youbeent
hroughalottoday,Isuggest
youmustgoandt akeabaththensleep.Don't
worryaboutthedi
shesIwi
llt
akecar eofthem
Me:
Okay
Hekissedmyf or
eheadwhi l
esayi
ng" Iloveyou"
,
soImademywayupst air
st omyroom.It ooka
warm bat
hf i
l
ledwithbubblesandIrelaxedinit
.
Aft
erawhile,Idr
iedmyselfandwentt osleep
wit
hmypy jamason.
[
NEXTMORNI
NG]

Myphonest ar
tedri
ngingcreati
nganui
sance
nextt
omyear ,Idi
dn'tevenhavethet
houghtt
o
checkthecall
eri
denti
tyIjustputt
hephone
nextt
omyear
Me:
Hel
l
o
Cal
l
er:
Wakeupsl
eepyhead!
I
tsoundedasThandazwa'
svoi
cebutseemed
morefr
eshli
kesl
eepdidn'
tmakei
t'
swayt oher
Me:Yousnob!Whydi
dyouhav
etowakemeup
soearl
y?!
Her
:Myt
all
-ass-
bit
chit'
s11:
30am andy
ou
t
ell
i
ngmeIwokey ouup?
Me:
Myshor
tbase-
bit
ch 
Idi
dn'
tev
encheckt
he
t
ime 
Wef oundour
sel
vespr
acti
call
ylaughi
ngnot
knowingwhatmayhavecausedthatt
ypeof
behav
iour
Her:
Iwast
hinki
ngwecoul
dgooutf
ormov
ies
andsomel
unchlat
eron
Me:
Iki
ndal
iket
hati
deabutI
'
m goi
ngt
otel
lyou
i
fwewil
lgo
Her
:Okayf
ri
end,
pleasedon'
tdi
sappoi
nt
Me:
Iwi
l
ltr
ynott
o,seey
oul
ater
Her
:Cheer
s
Aftert
hatphonecal lfrom Thandazwa, Iwoke
upandf ixedmybedt henwentt otakeashower .
Iremember edthatwewer etomydad' shouse
togoandseet hi
smy steri
ous"l
etter"thathad
mewr itt
enalloverit
.Wi t
hmebei ngdonewi t
h
myhy geineprocess,Iwentdownst aisand
Bandil
ewast heretalkingt ohi
sphone.
Laughinginexactwhi ledoingbreakfast
Bandi
l
e:Ineedt
ogo,
Ilov
eyoubabe
.
..
Bandi
l
e:Mor
ethanany
thi
ngmyl
ove,
bye
Her
emovedt
hephoneandl ookedatmewi
tha
smi
l
espr
eadfrom hi
sface.
Lovewasrej
oici
ngintheai
rformybrot
her,I
thi
nkweweregoingtobeulul
ati
ngtowelcome
amakoti(
bri
de)thi
scomingdays! 
Me:
Mor
ningt
oyout
oo
Hejustchuckl
edbecauseheknewt
hatIwas
makingamockery
Bandi
le:
Morni
ng 
onthi
slov
ely,
beauti
ful
day
wit
hseabreezedoi
ngamarvel
ousjobenter
ing
thi
sfl
at!
Oh!Everywi
ndowwasopenedbecauseitwas
real
l
yabeautif
uldaywit
hthesunshi
ningdown
onEarthandever
ythi
ngseemedtobelovel
y
Bandi
l
e:Sowemustgot
oTy
ger
bur
gI'
m needed
somewhere
Me:
Okay,
bhuti
canigowit
hThandazwat
othe
movi
esaft
erwecameback
Hel
ookedatmei
ndi
sbel
i
ef
Bandi
le:
Ithi
nky
ouf
orgett
haty
ouar
est
il
l
puni
shed
Iwi
shedhehadf
orget
tonaboutt
hat
!
Me:
Please!Ineedt
ogetoutofher
e!
Bandi
l
e:Let
'smakeadeal
then
Me:
I'
m al
lear
s
Iwoul
ddoanyt
hingj
usttohav
eani
cet
imewi
th
myfri
endl
i
ter
all
yanyt
hing
Bandi
l
e:Youmustwashal
ltoday
'sdi
shest
hen
youmaygo
Me:
I'
min!
Bandi
l
e:Good!
 
Weshookhandst olayev
ery
thi
ngont hetable,
j
usttoshowappr ov
alofmydecisi
on.Hedished
upandweat e.Iqui
ckl
ywashedthedishesin
thesi
nk.SoItookmyphoneandf ol
lowed
behi
ndhim becausehehadtol
dmehei sdone
wi
thev
ery
thi
ng.
 
Wewenttothecarandchangedseat
swhi
ch
wasqui
teunusualt
ohappen
Me:
Andt
hen?
Bandi
l
e:Youar
egoi
ngt
odr
ivet
oday
!
Me:Poi
ntofor
der
!Fi
rstofal
lIcan'
tev
endr
ivea
car
Bandi
l
e:Theni
t'
syourdaytol
ear
n,comson!Get
i
nandf ast
eny
ourseatbel
t
Istumpedmyfeetandgotint
othedr
iver
'sseat
,
thenfast
enedmyseatbel
t.
 
Bandi
le:
Okaynow,putonyourlef
tfootont
hat
paddl
ewhichiscal
ledcl
utch.
 
Me:
Okay
Iassembl
edmy
sel
fanddi
dasi
nst
ruct
ed
Bandil
e:Makesureyourgeari
sonneutr
aland
thentwistt
hekeytostartwhi
l
esteppi
ngonthe
clut
ch(Ididandsuccesf
ull
yswit
chedonthe
car
).Good,nowslowlyrel
easefrom t
heclutch
whil
eyourri
ghtfeetst
epsont heaccel
arator
andthecarwil
lmov e
Yesthecarstar
tedmov
ingandIwassohappy
,
fort
hefi
rstti
mei nmyl
i
feIfi
nal
lyknowhowto
dri
ve
Me:
Wear
emov
ing!
Bandi
le:
Yep!Nowdon'
tgett
oexci
tedwemay
causeanacci
dent
 
Di
dhereal
l
yhav
etoshatt
ermymoment
?But
mybr
other
!Hei
ssomethi
ngel
se
Me:
Joyki
l
ler
!
.
.
Wef i
nall
yarr
ivedi
nfrontoft
hismassi
vehouse
whichseemedt obeundergoodmaint
anance
ev
ent houghnoonelivedi
nit.
 
Me:
Ist
hisi
t?
Bandi
l
e:Yessi
s
Me:
Wow!I
t'
ssohuge!
Hejustsmi l
ed,Bandilepull
edov eri
nthe
dri
veway.Igav ethecarbackt obecausedri
ving
wasjusttir
ing.Wewenti nsidethehousefr
om
thedooritwasf ull
ofspiderwebsanddust ,no
onewasar oundt ocleanitbutbesidest
hatit
wasbeaut i
ful.
Bandi
l
e:Wel
come 
todad'
shouse
Me:Ial
readyf
eel
wel
comedev
ent
houghhei
s
nother
e 
Bandi
le:
Ithur
tswi
thl
otsofmemor
iest
reasur
ed
i
nthishouse
Me:
Atl
easty
ouhav
ememor
ies
Bandi
le:
Youalsohav
ememor iesbecauseyou
onecamewheny ouwerebackfrom the
hospi
talandIwassohappytohaveasister
Me:
Oh,
cany
oushowmet
hissaf
eal
ready
?
Iwasgett
ingt
iredofal
ltheemot
ional
tal
k,we
doital
otsoIjusthadt
obackdown
Bandi
l
e:Fol
l
owme
Ifoll
owedbehi ndBandil
eandhewasgoi ngtoa
mor eopen-planspacesituatedbytheexitt
o
thegar den(Isawfl
ower sthroughthewindow
andpr edict
editmaybet hegar den)
.Itwasa
studywhi chwasjustsimplebutal otofbooks
surroundingit,
Bandil
estartedmov i
ngbooks
andt herewassafepeekingatus
Me:
Ist
hati
t?
Bandi
l
e:Yes
Me:
Openi
t!
 
Hestartedpressi
ngonthenumberswhichwere
t
hereandi topeninst
ant
ly,
Iwentcl
osertoopen
t
ocollectthebrownenvel
ope 
Bandi
l
e:Ar
eyour
eady
? 
Inoddedmyheadupanddown.Il
ookedatt
he
envol
openotknowi
ngwhet
hertoopeni
tornot
Bandi
l
e:Posi
ti
ve?
Me:
110%posi
ti
ve
Bandi
l
e:Doi
t
Iqui
cklyri
ppedthel
ett
eranr
eadt
henot
ewhi
ch
wasinsideofi
t,
Dad:MyoneandonlydaughterSizi
phi
we
Lonoko,
Ihopeyouarereadyandf i
ttohear
aboutal
lthet
ragedyyouaregoingtoface.
 
Iwrot ethislet
tert otellyouthat ,
aso- called
cursewi llt
ransferedt oy ouwhenIdi e.Iknow
i
t'shear t
-breakingbutt hereisnot hingt hatI '
m
abletodot orev erseever yt
hingthatwi llhappen.
Justknowt haty ouwi l
lremai nDaddy '
snumber
oneev enthoughIwasn' taroundt oseey ou
growupandbecomeawonder f
ul l
adyt haty ou
are,thecur sewi ll
onlygetwor seify oukeep
feel
ingsor ryfory ourselfandpl easebest rong
mybabyj ustfory ourbr other'
ssake.Cal lthi
s
number072* *** ***t
of indyourr elativesand
knowNonzameLol oisnoty ourbi ological
motherbutmoreofaper
sonwhohasbeen
anoi
tedtotakeofy
ou.
 
PleasealwaysrememberIwi l
lal
waysl
oveyou
andIl ov
ey oumychil
dren.Takecar
eofeach
other.Ti
llweseeeachotheragai
n! 
Nothi
ngwasabletodescribehowIf el
t,deep
downIwashurt.Af
terreadingthatl
etterIj
ust
sl
idedownthebookshelfcryi
ngmyl ungsout
whil
ehuggi
ngmyknees.
WhatdidIdot odeservethisl
if
e?Whydon' tI
j
ustdieandl eav
eallthi
sbehind?Butwhyhasi t
tobeme?Shoul dIalway shavetosav
e
ever
yone'sbuttsotheymayl i
vehappi
ly?MustI
bethereonet osav
eev eryonefr
om si
n?Wor st
ofall
acur sehastobet hrownintomylif
e!
.
..
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t29
•
Nar
rat
ed•
Bandi
lest
oodtherenotknowingwhattodoor
saytohi
ssist
erbecausehethoughttohi
msel
f
"Whati
fIsaysomethi
ngthatiswrongwhichi
s
goi
ngtobeoffendi
ngtowardsher?"
.
Couldn'
thandlethefactthathissi
sterwas
cryi
ngandhecan' tdoany t
hingtohelpher,
Bandil
efoundhimselfalsosober i
ngwhichwas
l
iter
all
yheart-
breaki
ngtov iew.Noonewant ed
toseethei
rsibli
ngsorany onewhot hei
rlove
andknowt hat'
sit'
sonlyrelat
ivesoitwasn'
t
easy
Bandi
l
e:Whatdoest
hel
ett
ersay
? 
Si
zi
phiwet
hrewthelet
tert
owar
dsBandi
l
eand
hegr
abbediti
nhishands.
 
Qui
cklytraci
nghi seyest
hroughthelet
ter,
he
j
ustfrozenotknowi ngwhattosay.Wordsgot
l
ostinhismout hbuthehadt odosomet hi
ngto
hel
prev i
vehissister
 
Bandi
le:
Sist
eritsgoi
ngtobeokay
?Wewi
l
lget
thr
oughthisthebothofus!
Tear swereal r
eadyplayi
ngamajorroleofbei
ng
at hreati
nhi seyes.Thecri
escomingfrom
Siziphiwejustpier
cedthroughhi
seardrums
andshat teredhisheart
.
Sizi
phiwe:
Icouldneverl
iv
ethrought
his!Ineed
tofi
ndoutaboutalltheups&downsofmyl i
fe,
i
t'
sr at
herIfoundoutorIdie
Bandi
l
e:Whatdoy
oumeandi
e?
Hewasf
ranki
l
yconf
used 
Si
zi
phi
we:
Ial
sodon'
tknowwhatImean
Bandil
e:Exact
ly 
youdon'
t!Okayl
et '
scal
lthe
numberont helett
ermaybewillcanfi
nd
somethingtohelporgoandv i
sitNonzamein
theEasternCape
Si
zi
phiweremovedher
sel
ffr
om Bandi
leand
l
ookedathim wi
thadi
sappr
oval
face
Si
zi
phi
we:
Hel
lno!I
'
m nev
ergoi
ngbackt
othat
house!
Bandi
l
e:Si
st hatwer
ey oucanfi
ndpeaceand
knowthereasonbehindthi
scurse!
 
Si
zi
phi
we:
I'
m notgoi
ngt
her
e! 
Bandi
l
e:Won'
tyoujustli
stentomeSi zi
phi
we!
(Hewasshout
ing)Li
stenhere,wearegoingt
o
ECtofi
ndoutevery
thing!Li
keitornot!
 
Si
zi
phi
we:
O-o-
kaybhut
iwecango 
Shewasshaki ng.Nooneev ersawtheother
si
deofBandi l
eev enhi
sgir
lfri
endsawit.Maybe
ourfeel
ingscanriseupint
osomet hi
ng
ext
raordinar
yandwemustal waysbecareful
Bandi
le:
Good!Nowl
et'
sgot
oMcDonal
dsI
'
m
hungr
y
Si
zi
phi
we:
Okayl
et'
sgo
Bandil
ehel
pedSiziphi
weupandshef oldedthe
l
ettert
henpl
aceditinherpocket,t
hei
rlocked
thehousewhi
chwasext remelycoldwhenthey
l
eft.I
twashotoutsideandevenwhent hey
camei
nitwashot
. 
Si
zi
phi
we:
Bandi
Bandi
l
e:Mmh?
Si
ziphi
we:
Don't
 yout
hinkt
her
ear
eghost
sin
dad'
shouse?
 
Bandil
e:Hahayouandyourimagi
nat
ionar
e
runni
ngwi l
dagai
n!Ghosts?
Hechuckl
edwhi
l
ethei
rwenti
nsi
det
hecar
Sizi
phi
we:Yesghosts!Toal
ltheser
iesof
Ghostbust
ersIhavebeenwatchi
ng,itget
scol
d
i
nr oom wher
eghost sar
earoundli
keinthi
s
case
Bandi
le:
I'
m notsayi
ngy ouar
ecr
azyoranythi
ng
butIr
eall
ydon'tbel
iev
ei nt
hemythofghosts
Si
ziphi
we:
Let'
s 
justdr
opi
tbecausei
tseemswe
ar
enotgoingtoresol
vet
his
Bandi
l
e:Sur
edo
Okay
!Bandi
l
est
art
edt
hecaranddr
ovet
o
Mcdonal
dssoheparkedthecar
,theystoodin
t
hequeueandSizi
phi
we'sphonestart
edringi
ng
i
twasThandazwa
Si
zi
phi
we:
Fri
endshi
p
Thandazwa:
MyF,ar
eyoust
il
loutandaboutf
or
thei
deatothemovi
es?
Sizi
phi
we:
Iwasst
il
lthi
nki
ngabouti
tbutacr
isi
s
roseup
Thandazwa:
Man!Okaycan'
tIcomeov
erwi
th
Khanyi
soandtheot
hers?
Sizi
phi
we:Thandazwano!AsIsai
dIhave
somethi
ngthatrockedupokay?Sopl
ease
Thandazwa:
Oh?By
eSi
zi
phi
we
Si
zi
phi
we:
Idi
dn'
tmean-
Beforeshecouldfini
shhersentence,
Thandazwahasdi sconnect
edt hecal
l.Wasshe
pushingevery
oneawayf rom her?Buthey,
she
i
sst i
l
l gr
iev
ingaboutwhathappened
Bandi
l
e:Andwhatwast
heshor
t-
temperf
or?
Si
zi
phi
we:
Notnowpl
ease
Sizi
phiwewenttosi
tatthet
ableswait
ing
anxiousl
yfort
hefoodBandi
lehadordered.
 
Thefoodcamewi
thBandi
l
eandt
heyst
art
ed
eat
ing
Bandi
l
e:Her
eissomemoneyt
ogohome
Si
zi
phi
we:
Aren'
twegoi
ngt
oget
her
?
Bandi
l
e:NoI
'
m neededi
nameet
ingdownt
own
Si
zi
phi
we:
Okayby
e
Bandi
l
e:By
e
Bandilet
ookhiskeysandlef
ttherest
urant.
Thereshewassi t
ti
ngalonewit
hnoonet otalk
to.Shetookherphoneandstart
edpaging
throughbutnotknowi
ngwhatshei sl
ookingfor.
.
.
[
SIZI
PHI
WE]
Wel
l
,whatcanIsayaboutmyl
i
fe?
 
It
'sjusthorri
blefr
om beingrapingt othecursed
drama, noonel i
kenooneev eni ntheirwi
ldest
dreamswoul dwishtobeinshoes.I tmayseem
l
ikeI '
m pushingever
yoneawayf rom mebut
clearlypeopl
edon'tseem tounder standthatI
needast r
angerorfr
iendtotalktoaboutmy
'
cur sedli
fe'
.
WhenBandi leleftmealoneMcDonal ds,I
thoughtaboutThandazwa.Myf ri
endwast ry
ing
allshecouldtobet ruefr
iendbutIwasinstantl
y
turni
ngherdown.Myphonebeepedwhi ch
meantitwasamessage/ WhatsAppnotif
icat
ion
soIcheckedi ttoseewhoi twasf r
om.The
personIhadf orgetaboutbuthey,he
remember edthatthesomeonespeci alandit
wasKhany isomessage
Khany
iso:
Myhoney
-boo,I
'
m sorr
yIcouldn'
tcal
l
i
nthemorningt
ocheckonyou.I
'm busywit
h
famil
yandIneedtobewi
ththem any
waysI
hopey ouar
esti
l
lmuchal
iveandIlov
eyoumy
wife.
 
Thatjustmeltedmyheartf
rom al
lthe
highl
ight
sIhadf acedt
hatmessageseemedt o
awakemet hatsomeoneoutthel
ov esmeand
cares.SoIrepli
edbackandthenstart
ed
walkingfr
om theMcDee'stothenearestmal
l
. 
AsIwaswal ki
ng.List
eni
ngtomyj ams, Icoul
d
feel
thatsomeonewaswat chingnorstari
ng
andIdon'tli
keaper sonwhojustwatchesy ou
butdoesn'tcomef orwar
d,don'ty
ouhat ethat
? 
SoIlookedbackbutdi dn'
tseeanyonebut
peoplewerejustmi ndingthei
rownbusi ness.I
conti
nuedwi ndow- shoppingbutthi
sperson
keptwatchingmeandIdeci dedtostopandsee
whoitwasagai n.Thist al
lguybutnotthattall
guywithpinklips,yellow-bone/l
i
ghtskinned
camest r
aighttomeandhest ar
tedtal
king
Guy
:Iseey
ouhav
efor
fi
tt
edt
oseewhowas
f
oll
owi
ngy
ou 
Me:
Oh?Youwher
etheonef
oll
owi
ngme?
Guy:Yes.Icoul
dn'
ttakeof
fmyey
est
osucha
beauti
fulladyl
i
keyou
Me:
Okayi
fyousayso
Guy:
Whyarebeingsocoldman?Can'
tyousee
ahotni
ggaisherefort
hismmh-(heanal
ysed
mybody) 
Me:
Cutt
heshor
ttal
k!Whatdoy
ouwant
?
Guy
:Okay
!I'
m Menzi
Gumedeandy
ouar
e?
Me:
Ababal
weMay
Iwouldnevernonev ergiveoutmyr eal
namet o
apersonIjustsawatt hemallnever.Whatifi
s
aseri
alkil
l
er?Ev enwor seamurderer?Iknow
i
t'
skindofcrazybutpeopl earetur
ningint
o
monstersnowaday s
Menzi:
CanIhav
eyournumber
s?Per
phapst
ake
youhome?
Me:072y
ouwon'
tgetmynumberandpl
easeI
hav
eacartot
akemehome
WhowasIfool
ingwher
edi
dIgetacar
?Andi
t
wasal
ieontopofanot
her
Menzi
:Okayfi
neany waysI
'
m goi
ngt
oseey
ou
ar
ound.Enj
oyy ourday
Me:
Thanksy
out
oo.
"
Phew!He'sfi
nall
ygone"that'
swasmyhear t
t
alki
ngtomybr ai
nandthisMenzi guywas
r
eall
yscary
.Hesot al
landv er
yveryfit
,he
l
ookedli
keanFBIagentorany t
hinginvol
vi
ng
t
hegovernmentinbet
ween.  
Myphonest
art
edri
ngingagai
n,what
'
supwi
th
somuchcal
lst
oday?
 
Ianswer
edwi
thoutchecki
ngt
hecal
l
eri
dent
it
y
Me:
Hel
l
o?
Cal
l
er:
Am Ispeaki
ngt
oSi
zi
phi
weLonoko?
Me:
Yes
Call
er:
Yourbrot
herhasbeeni
nvol
vedina
ter
ri
bleacci
dentandweneedyouhereatt
he-
Ifel
tmyphonesli
dingdownmyear
.Smashing
ontothepav
ementoutsi
dethemal
landI
suddenl
yfel
tweakandnothi
ngmadesenseto
me
Me:No!No!Bandi
l
ecan'
tbei
naacci
dentnot
whenIneedhim!
Whati
sgoingonwi thmyli
fe?Whydidn'
tIbe
t
heoneintheaccidenti
nst
eadofBandil
e?
What'
swrongwithme?
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t30
Idi
dn'tknowwhichst
eptot akewhetherI
shouldcall
acaborevenstartcal
l
ingthe
persontofindwhi
chhospi
talmybr ot
heri
s
Voi
ce:
Ababal
wewhat
'swr
ong?
Ababal
we?Whot
hehel
li
sAbabal
we?
 
IlookedupanditwasMenzi
,ohLor
dIhadlied
tohim aboutmyname.Ali
ecantur
nit
'sback
ony ou
Me:M-m-
ybr
otherhas-
sbeeni
nv-
olv
edi
nacar
acci
dent
Menzi
:
Doy
ouknowwhi
chhospi
tal
?
Ishookmyheadandtookoutmyphonet
ore-
cal
ltheper
sonwhotol
dmeaboutBandil
ebuti
t
wentbacktovoi
cemai
l.
 
Menzi
:
Let
'sgeti
ntomycarmay
bewecanf
indi
t
AsmuchasI '
m afrai
dtogowi thstr
angersIj
ust
hadt
ot histime,l
ikeitornot.Menziwrapped
hi
sarm aroundmyneckt ryi
ngtokeepmecal m
fr
om al
l t
hesniffi
ngandcr yi
ngthatmybody
wascreating.
 
HeopenedthepassangerdoorsoIcoul
dget
i
nsi
dethecarandIgotinthenburi
edmyf acei
n
bet
weenmyf ol
dedarms.Hopewasl ostbut
fai
thkeptbuldi
ngstrongi
nme, t
ell
ingmethat
everyt
hingwil
lbeokayandIbeli
eveditwoul
d.
Myphonest art
edringi
ngandIcheckedthe
call
erident
it
yanditwasBandil
e'
snumber
call
i
ngsoIanswer ed
Me:
Wher
eishe?
 
Person:
H-ehasbeenadmit
tedandIdon'
tknow
thehospi
talbutIwi
l
lsendyouthedi
rect
ions
Me:
SisKhazi
mlai
sthaty
ou?
Per
son:
Yesnanai
t'
sme 
Me:Pl
easedosendt
hedir
ect
ionsbecauseI
needt
obewi t
hmybrot
her
Her
:Iwi
l
lsendt
hem t
oyou
Me:
Thanks
Wehungupatt
hesamet i
meandMenzi
had
t
il
tedhi
sbodyt
olookatmydi
rect
ion
Menzi
:
And?
Me:
Hisgi
rl
fr
iendwi
l
lsendmedi
rect
ionst
othe
hospi
tal
Menzi
:
Okayl
etmest
artt
heengi
ne
HestartedthecarandIwor emysungl assesto
hidet
hepr esenceoft ears.Tear swerej ust
pouri
ngoutofmyey es,ifIloseBandi l
et henit
's
gameov erf ormeImi ghtaswel ldiewithhim.
Khazi
ml afinall
ysenttheco- ordinatestot he
hospi
talandMenzi drovedt here,IknowImay
haveli
edt ohim aboutmyi dentit
ybutI '
m not
thefi
rstpersont odot hat 
Me:ThanksMenzif
orev
erythi
ng,
Idon'tknow
whatIcouldhav
edoneify
ouwer enotaround
Menzi:
Noniggacanleav
eabeautli
keyou
cr
yingnextt
otheroadanddon'
thel
pthat
'sj
ust
wackman!
HehadanAmer
icanaccentandspokeexact
ly
l
iket
hem
Me:
Arey
ouAmer
icandespi
tey
ourname?
Ihadt
oaskbecausehi
saccentwasj
ustl
i
tand
Iseemedt
oli
kei
t
Menzi:
Nono!I'
m hal
fZul
uandTswanaandI
wasleavi
ngabroadf
orcl
oseto9year
sor
more 
Me:
Oh?Thatexpl
ainswhyy
ouspeakl
i
kean
Ameri
can
Menzi
:
Yep 
Thattalkwi
thMenzi mademeescapereali
tyf
or
awhi l
ebutwhenhest oppedatt
hehospi
tal
that
'swhenev er
ythi
ngsoundedl
essofa
fai
ryt
alemovie 
Me:Huh!Backt
oreal
i
ty,
thanksoncemor
efor
yourhel
p
Menzi:
Youar
ewel
come.CanIaccompanyy
ou
pl
ease?
InoddedbecauseIwasgoi ngtoneedateddy
beartocr
yonwhi chwasgoi ngtobeMenzi
acti
ngasit.Heparkedthecarandwewenti n,
I
wentstr
aightt
other ecept
iondeskandalady
wast
alki
ngt
othet
elephone
Recep:
Hol
donforasec.Goodaf
ter
noom mam,
howmayIhel
py ou?
Me:
I'
mlooki
ngf
orBandi
l
eLonoko,
hej
ustgoti
n
-
That'
swhenIbr
okedownt
alki
ngaboutwhat
happenedt
oBandi
le
Menzi
:Hewasinv
olovedinterr
ibl
eacci
dentand
weheardhe'
sadmitt
edinthishospi
tal
Recep:
Bandi
l
eLonoko?Bandi
l
eLonoko?
Shesaidt
hatpagingthr
oughthef
il
esandmade
asmirkonherfacebutnott
ous
"Siziphi
we!"Iheardmynamecal ledfr
om afar
andIl ookedupi twasKhazi
ml a,
Irantowards
l
eav ingthetwobehind.Shejusthuggedmeand
tearswer etheonlythi
ngcommuni cat
ingtothe
bot hofus
Me:
Whathappened?
Shewipedoutmytear
sandher
sthenpr
essed
herl
i
pst oget
her
 
Khazi
mla:Wehadal
i
ttl
efightandt
henstor
med
outoft
heapart
ment
.Itr
iedstoppi
nghi
m buti
t
wastoolate
Itwasadeepmat t
eri
ftheycoul
dev endaret
o
shoutateachot
herorevenfi
ghttogether
Me:
Justl
i
ket
hat
?
Khazi
mla:
Itj
ustt
oomucht
ohandl
e
Menzi
:
Ababal
wel
etmel
eav
e
Me:
Oh?Thanky
ouv
erymuchf
ory
ourhel
p 
Menzi
:
Any
time,
Ihopey
ourbr
otherget
'
swel
l
Me:
Hopesot
oo.By
e
Menzi
:
Byel
adi
es
HeleftusandwedecidedtogotoBandi
le'
s
wardroom.Whenwegoti ntot
heward.The
scenerywasjustt
oomuch.Imeanthepipes
connectedt
oBandileandmachi
nes
surr
oundinghimitwasjusttoomuchf
ormet o
see.Ij
ustrememberlookingathi
m wi
thtear
s
makingtheirwayout
.Thenal l
Iknowl
ight
s
shutdownf orme!
.
.
[
KHAZI
MLA]
Totellt
hetr
uth,Idon'
tknowwhatreal
ly
happenedbetweenBandil
eandI.Letmego
backandgothroughwhathappenedbefor
ehe
gotint
oanaccident.
 
Okay!Iwassit
ti
ngal oneinmyapartment
l
ist
eningtomymusi coni TunesandIhearda
knockcomingthroughmydoor .Iwenttogo
answer,whenIopenedi twasBandi
le
Me:
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?
Bandi
l
e:Shoul
dImakeanappoi
ntmentt
osee
mywife-
to-
be?
Hepul
l
edmecl
osert
ohi
m andpl
ant
edaki
ss
onmyneck
Me:
Ift
hatwi
l
lev
erhappen
Il
edtothel
ivi
ngroom sowecanseatdown
andhesatonthefl
oorinbet
weenmylegs
Bandi
l
e:BabeI
'
m hav
ingt
roubl
ewi
thmysi
ster
 
Me:
What
'swr
ong?
Ialwaysl
ovedSizi
phi
weasasisteri
nlawfr
om
thefi
rstt
imeIsawherinBandi
l
e'sapart
ment
Bandi
l
e:Shei
shav
ingbadl
uckscomi
ngf
rom
manythi
ngs
Me:
Babei
t'
sgoi
ngt
obef
ineokay
Bandi
l
e:Ihopeso
Ifl
ippedmyheadt oki sshi
m, everyt
hingwent
fr
om 50t o100i nt
hatmi nute.Ever
ything
start
edt osteam andhepi ckedmeupi nhis
armst henstartedkissingme.Iknewi twas
goingtot ur
nt oagamecal l
ed'int
imacy 'Iknow
manybef unnybutheyInev erdonei tbef or
e.
Bandi
l
e:Ar
eyour
eadyf
ort
his?
Me:
Idon'
tthi
nkso 
Bandi
le:Idon'
tseem tof
oll
owyoubecausewe
havecloseto5y ear
stoget
herbuty
etwedon'
t
i
t
Hehadreal
lyheldonyouknow5y ear
s.Noguy
woul
dtoler
atethatbuti
fhedoeshewill
Me:Pl
easedon'
tpressur
izemei
ntodoi
ng
somethi
ngIdon'
twanttodothi
s
Bandi
l
e:Youknowwhatj
ustf
orgetIwasher
e
Hestoodupandwor
ehi
st-
shi
rtal
sobut
toni
ng
hi
sjeans
Me:
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
Bandi
l
e:Ij
ustneedsomeai
r 
Hewentoutoft hefl
atwithangerfi
l
ledinthe
atmosphere.If
oll
owedbehindhim,shouting
outhisnamebutnor esponse.AsIquickl
y
rushedtohiscar,
hehadal r
eadyrever
singout
oft
hepar
king.
 
Nowthatpissedmeof
fbecauseIwon'
tmake
mysel
freadytomakel
ovetosomeoneifI
'
m not
r
eady.
 
WhatwasIsupposetodo?Insi
stmysel
fint
o
doi
ngthat
?Bandil
eissel
fi
shthough.
 
Iwentbacktot heapart
mentandwat ched
tel
evisi
on.Myphonest ar
tedri
ngingIanswer
ed
i
twi t
houtcheckingthecal
leri
denti
ty,
li
keI
alwaysdo.
Me:
KZML(
abbr
evi
ati
onofmyname)hel
l
o
Call
er:
Yourboy
fri
endhasj
ustgoti
ntoan
acci
dent
Me:
Whoi
sthi
s?Youmustbej
oki
ngr
ight
?
Call
er:
HopeIwas.Hehasbeenr
ushedt
othe
nearbyhospi
tal
.
 
Myjawjustdropped,Ididn'
texpectt
ohearthat
f
rom anyone.Icoul
dn'tbeli
evemyear sIj
ust
f
rozethi
nkingthatmaybet rue,buti
twaspart
oft
hedail
ylifeweli
ve.AndIhadtobewith
bot
hBandileasmyloveandoldersi
stert
o
Si
zi
phiwe,evenifwearebotr
elat
edbybloodI
won'
tmind. 
.
.
Wil
l Bandil
erecov
erfr
om hospi
tal
?Wil
l
Si
ziphiwealsogetwel
lfr
om passi
ngoutatt
he
hospital
? 
Ever
ythi
ngseemst obefall
i
ngapartatt
he
Lonokohousehol
ds!Butlet
'shopenot
hingbad
happens.
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t31
[
SIZI
PHI
WE]
Islowl
yopenedmyey esandstart
edscanning
aroundwi
thblurv
isi
ondistur
bingmyeyesight.I
couldseequitebetteratleastt
hatIhadrubbed
myey estogether.Inot
icedapipeconnectedto
myl ef
tarm andamachi nebeepingnextt
omy
earsbuti
tfeltli
keitwaspl ayi
ngr i
ghti
nsi
demy
head.Anursecamei nholdingatray.
 
Nur
se:
Iseey
oudeci
dedt
owakeup
Shehadasmi
l
ewr
it
tenal
lov
erherf
ace
Me:
Wher
eismybr
other
?Isheokay
?
Iwasstar
ti
ngtof
eel
ther
ushoff
lashbacks
comingback
Nur
se:
He'sact
ual
lyf
inehegotdi
schar
gedf
rom
t
heICU,2weeksago
2weeksago?Whati
sthatsupposet
omean?
Me:Hej
ustarr
ivedandhecan'
tbedi
schar
ged
i
t'
stoear
ly 
Nurse:
Mydar
li
ng,
youhav
ebeeni
nthi
sbedf
or
cl
oseto3months
Wow!Thatwassomet
hingext
raor
dinar
y,Ican'
t
passoutf
orcloset
o3mont
hsi
tis
unbel
i
eveabl
e
Me:
3mont
hs?Youmustbej
oki
ng!
Nurse:
WishIwas,
pleaseeaty
ourf
rui
tand
somecereal
Iwonderhowdi dsheknowIwoul dwakeupby
bringingthefoodwhenshecamet ocheckup
onme?Sot henurseleft
.Ist
artedeati
ngupt he
foodshehadbr oughttome.AsIwaseat i
ngI
feltanotherpresenceinther
oom andIl ooked
upt oseewhoi twas.Itwasthedoctorholdi
ng
af i
leandapen.Hehadasmi leonhisandhe
startedspeaking
Doct
or:
MissLonoko,
howar
eyouf
eel
i
ng?
Me:
I'
mfi
net
hanksandy
oudoc?
Doct
or:
I'
m al
sogood,Ihav
esomegoodand
badnewsbutnott
hatbadfory
ou 
Me:
Pleaseoutwi
thi
t
Doct
or:
Okayokay
.Wel
lyoucol
l
apsedduet
o
tr
aumaanddepressional
sostress.Itmayhave
buil
tupi
nsi
deyouandev eryt
hingjustbur
sted
whenyoucoul
dn'tholdi
tinanymor e.
Ihadtobestr
essedIhav
ebeent
hroughal
otof
dramaalr
eady
Me:
Butf
or3mont
hs,
int
hehospi
tal
?
Doctor:Wethi
nkitmayhavebeenshock
causingtheprobl
em butwear
eallhappyt
o
havey oubackwithus
Ismi
l
edf
aint
lyandl
ookedbackatt
hedoct
or
Me:
WhencanIseemybr
other
?
Doct
or:
Uhm..youcangonowbutIwi
l
lcal
la
nur
setoassi
styoutohi
sward
Me:
Thanks
Thedoct
orlef
tther
oom andaelder
lynur
se
cameinpushi
ngawheel
chairt
owardsthebed
Nurse:
Let
'sgoandseeyourbr
otherhehas
beenaski
ngaboutyou
Me:
Real
l
y?(
Smi
l
ing)
Nur
se:
Yesmydear
Shehelpedmei ntothewheel
chai
randpushed
meallthewayt oBandil
e'
sward.Khazi
mlawas
nextt
ohi m,hol
dinghishandatl
astnopipes
wereattachednorsurr
oundi
nghim
Me:
Bandi
l
e?
Helookedupandsmil
edwit
hhi
sdi
mpl
es
r
eveali
ngasthei
ral
waysdo
Bandi
le:
Sizi
phi
we?Youf
inal
l
ywokeup!Pl
ease
don'
tthattomeagai
n
Me:
Alsowi
l
lyou
Ist
oodupf rom thewheelchairt
ogi
vehima
warm hugandaki ssonthecheek.Wetalked
buthehadal ossofmemor y
,buthedi
dn'
t
for
getanyoneofusi ncl
udingKhazi
mlawhich
wasagoodt hi
ng. 
Bandi
l
e:HeySi
zi
phi
we?
Me:
What
?
Herai
sedhi
shandt
opl
aywithhi
sbeadand
l
ookedatmewit
hhi
seyebr
owrai
sed
Bandi
l
e:Doyourememberthel
ett
ert
hatwe
wentt
ocoll
ectatdad'
shouse?
Iwasgett
ingi
ntodeepthoughtbutIdi
dn'
t
rememberthi
slet
terhewastalki
ngabout
Me:
BroIdon'
trememberi
t
Bandi
le:
Comeonman!Ther
eonewhi
chwasi
n
thwsafe
Let
ter
?Lett
er?Shi
t!Thelet
terwit
htherelat
ive
numberandever
ythi
ngelse.Okay!Nowitwas
goi
ngtobeanotherquesttofi
ndthelet
ter.
Me:
Bandi
l
e!Thel
ett
er!OhmyGodwher
ecoul
d
i
tbe?
 
Thatwher
emyanxi et
ylevelswentup,
yesI
rememberaboutt
helett
erandIr emember
placi
ngi
tinmypocketont hatday.
Me:
ExcusemeNur
se?
Nur
se:
Yesmychi
l
d?
Me:
Doy
ouknowwer
emycl
othescoul
dbe?
Nurse:
Theyar
einy
ourcabi
netwi
thy
our
cel
l
phone 
Me:
Canwegoandt
akei
t?
Nur
se:
That
'sf
inewi
thme
IlookedatBandi l
eandhenoddedt hatwasa
approvingsignt hatImaygo.Thenur seandI
wentt omywar d, shewassomethingelseI
meanshet oler
at edme, pol
i
temannerof
speakingandIl iket hatt
obedonet ome.I
foundt hel
etterwhi chwasagreatr el
i
efandthe
nursehelpedmeont omybedbecausehershif
t
wasgoi ngtoend
Nur
se:
NanaIwi
l
lseey
out
omor
rowmor
ning
Me:
Okayma
Shesmi
l
ed.Iconnect
edmyphonet
oachar
ger
soIcoul
dlogi
ntomysoci
alnet
wor
k
account
s. 
Iwasst il
lst
unnedatthefactIwasinhospi
tal
forthreemonths!YesIt'
sreal
lycr
azy,
Ijust
passedoutnot hi
ngelse.AsIwaspaging
throughmyphoneanot hernursecamein
Nur
se:
Her
eisy
ourf
ood
Notev
ena"
hel
l
o"?Comeon!
Ijusttooktheplat
eandstar
tedeati
ng.Nothi
ng
muchwasi nter
esti
ngont.
vbecausether
ewer e
fourbroadcasti
ngchannel
sSABC1,2,3and
E.tv.
 
Ifi
nishedeati
ngthefoodandthenur
secamet o
taketheplat
e.Themeal wasni
ceIguess.Iwas
givenmedicati
onandthenIendedupsleepi
ng.

*
***
Thefol
l
owingdayIwokeuptoabrightmorni
ng.
Iwashappyt
hatIwasgett
ingdi
schargedas
soonasIwokeupanot herdoctorcame,Iknow
i
t'
swrongtodrooloveraolderpersonbutI
coul
dn'
tst
opmy selfonthisone. 
Hewasat al
l,darkski
nnedguyandy oubet
ter
knowIl ikechocolateski
nnedguy,l
etmeget
backt odescribingthi
sguy.AsIsaid,Hewasa
tal
l,darkskinned,muscularbodyandweari
ng
cutenerdgl asses. 
Me:
Takemet
oHeav
enwi
thy
ou
Doct
or:
Excuseme,
what
?
Me:
What
?
Herepl
ayedwhatIhadsaid.Iwast
hinki
ngout
l
oudsohemustunderstand
Me:
Myl
i
ter
atur
etookov
er
Doctor
:Ohokay(
Conf
used)
.Ihaveyourr
elease
for
mswi t
hmeandistheanyonewhowil
lsign
t
hem?
Me:
Iwi
l
ldoi
t
Doct
or:
Okay
Hehandedthefor
mstomeandsmi l
edtothe
si
debecausehehadseent
hatIwasfasci
nat
ed
byhi
m andreal
l
yIwas. 
Doctor
:Thankyou,
Iwil
lhav
ey ourmedicat
ion
wit
hbef or
eyougoandIadviceyougof or
t
herapysessionst
orevi
veyourspi
ri
t.
 
Me:
Okaydoc
Hewalkedt
othedoorandhehadbrackets.He
l
ookedatmethenwinkedswi
ft
lyandthatdrov
e
mecrazyo-
kay!
 
Thenur
secamei
nwi
thherf
acel
i
ght
enedup
Nur
se:
Readyt
ogohome?
Me:
Ofcour
sema
Nur
se:
Good
Shehelpedmewi thever
ythi
ngf r
om washi
ng
mybodyt owear i
ngmyclothes.Iwor
eaNike
tr
acksuitpant
ieswit
haNi keRosheandaplai
n
bl
ackt
-shi
rt
.Ibr
ushedof
fmyhai
r.
 
Me:
Thankyouver
ymuchf
ory
ourhel
pma.I
r
eal
l
yappreci
atei
t
Nurse:
Anyt
hingf
orasweetAngel
li
key
ou.Now
l
et'
sgot oy
ourbrot
her
. 
Itookmyspor tsbagandmedi cinet henwewent
toBandi le'swar d.Thei
r( Him andKhazi mla)
wer ealsoont heirwayt othecar .Bandi l
ewas
walkingwi thcrunches.Wedi dev eryt
hingf r
om
signingrel easef or
mst opaper wor k.Wewentt o
Khazi mla'scarIal sodidn'tknowshewas
drivi
ng,shehadabl ackNi ssanAl mer awithher
nameper sonali
zedont henumberpl ates.
Somet hingswerestarti
ngtofal
lbackt opl
ace
andother swerestil
lnotquit
eback.Iwasjust
happyt hatwewer edischar
gedfrom hospit
al
butthesewasj ustphaseoneoft hecurse
maybei tmay /wi
llupgradesoonbutIhopeit
doesn't,thatwasev er
ythi
nggoingthroughmy
mindbuti twil
lgetbetteri
ntime.Ineedtothe
Easter
nCapetogetaclearmi
ndsetandI
shoulddef
inet
elydot
hat!
.
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t32
Welltwomont hspassedandIwasst il
li
nCape
Town, i
twasar oundSept embersoBandi l
eand
Icameupwi t
hadeci si
ont ogot oEasternCape
j
usttoseehowt hef amilywasdoi ng.WasI
dati
ngKhany iso?Yes, i
twasof fi
cialthatwe
weredatingev ent houghwet ri
edtokeepi ta
secr
etbet weenusbutnot hingstayshidden
for
ever.Amangel ehadgi venbirthherbabygirl
namedOkuhl ewhowasj ustadorable. 
Thedreamswer est i
l
l aroundbutt
heirwentthat
scaryanymoreaftertherapysessi
onsIhav e
beenattendi
ng,thei
rseemedt obereveal
inga
hiddenpict
urebehindt hem andIt
ri
edal l
Icould
t
of oundout.Ididn'
tgobacktoconsul
ta
t
radit
ional
healerjusttoav
oiddi
sappoi
ntment
t
hatmayr esultagain.
Bandi
l
er ecover
edverywellf
rom t
heaccident
andKhazimlawaspregnantmaybetheirwere
doi
ngitmanyt i
mesbutwewi ll
neverknow. 
Iwoul
dsayIwasgoodi nacademicsnot
hing
wasahassleandyesthecursewassti
ll
with
mebutIfi
nall
ydigest
editwascreat
edforme.
.
.
ItwasaSaturdaymorningandwewer ehoping
togotoEasternCapebutIsti
llhadthatgr
udge
every
thi
ngmaycomebackagai n.SoIwokeup
thenwentt
ot hebathr
oom totakeashower
anddotheprocess.
 
Ifi
nishedandIwor emyshort
swit
hat anktop
andf l
ip-
fl
iops,
Iti
edmyt wi
sti
ntoaloosebun
whichwassomet hingIdi
doccasi
onaly
.My
phonewasri
ngi
ngitwasKhany
isoandI
answer
edimmidi
atel
y
Me:
Bae?
Hi
m:Myl
ove
Me:
Yesdear
?
Khanyi
so:Myfamil
ywoul
dli
ketomeetwithyou
todayandthei
rsai
d,"
Noisnotananswerf
or
them"
Iwasnowconf
usedsoKhany
isohadt
oldt
hem
aboutme?Wow!He'
sfast
Me:
Didy
out
ell
them aboutme?
Him:
No,yesbuti
twassomet
hingt
hatwasnot
donei
ntensi
onal
l
y 
Me:
Thenhowdi
dthei
rfi
ndoutaboutme?
Hi
m: Mysist
ersawyourpi
ctur
easmydi
spl
ay
pi
ctureandrantot
ell
ourmom
IwasabitscaredbecauseIdi
dn'
tknowhowhi
s
fami
lywouldreactwhenthei
rsawme
Hi
m:Babepl
easecomet
hroughIwi
l
lcomeand
pi
ckyouup
Me:
Fine!Whatt
ime?
Hi
m:Ar
ound12:
45
Me:
Okayseey
out
hen
Hi
m:Lov
eyou
Me:
Lov
eyout
oo
Wehungupatt hesamet i
me.Idi dn'
tknow
whetheritwasar ightt
hingtomeetwi thhis
f
amily!ButIthinkitwassomet hingshowi ngit
wasagr eatsignforourrelat
ionship.Ithr
ew
myselfonthebedbecauseIwasabi texcit
ed
t
omeetwi t
ht hePill
ayfamily
. 
Iwentdownst ai
rstomakesomethingtoeatf
or
myselfandBandilewasther
etal
kingtohis
phone,ItookoutabowlthenpouredCorn
Fl
akesint hebowlandaddedmilksoIcaneat
up.
 
Bandi
l
e:Wear
eleav
ingMondayf
orEast
ern
Capeandwewi l
lcomebackFri
day
.Youwon'
t
haveschool
thatweekanhe?
 
Me:
Yes,
wewi
l
lgonextweekTuesday
Bandi
l
e:Okayt
hen
Ist
art
edeati
ngandIwantedtot
ell
him about
i
nvi
tat
ionIgotf
rom Khany
iso
Me:Bhut
iIgotani
nvi
tef
orl
unchbyaf
ri
end,
can
Igo?
Hi
m:Whi
chf
ri
end?
Me:
It
'sKhany
iso 
Bandi
l
e:Oh?Iwonderwher
ewi
l
lyougo
Me:
Ial
sodon'
tknow.Ij
usthav
ewai
tandsee
Bandilej
ustsmi l
edbecauseIknewi nhishead
somet hi
ngwasgoi ngon.AsIl ongedtotell
Thandazwaaboutt hepl ansaheadofmet oday
Icouldn'
t,shelostherphonef r
om oneofthe
part
iesthatshehadat tended.Iwenttomy
room andst ar
tedpr eparingfort
his"
lunch"wit
h
thePill
ay'
swhil
elist
eni
ngt
oCalv
inHarr
isf
t
RihannaxThisIsWhatYouCameForandI
start
edsingi
ngalong
Me:Babyt
hisiswhaty
oucamef or
,li
ghti
ning
st
ri
keseveryt
imeshemovesandeverybodyis
watchi
ngherbutshei
slooki
ngatyou,you,you
AndIwasdanci ngalongtot hesong.Iworemy
casual
cl othesandpumpsj ustt oimpressthem.
Il
etmyt wi stloosethisti
meandIdi dn'
tapply
anymake- uporanyoft hat,onceagainmy
phonest artedringi
ngandt histimethenumber
wasdifferentf r
om number sI '
m usedto.I
answeredt hecal l
Me:
Hel
l
o
Cal
ler
:Iseeyourecover
edf
rom t
hati
nci
dent
youandy ourbr
other
Me:
Whoar
eyou?Howdoy
ouknow?
Cal
ler
:Sweethear
tdon'teventr
ytof
indoutwho
i
tisbecauseyouwill
nev erdoso
Me:Don'
ttel
lmet
hatcr
apwheny
oudeci
dedt
o
cal
lme
Call
er:
Iseeyougotthesamecharacteri
sti
cs 
as
yourdad.Makesureyouaref
itenought o
handlemewhenIcomecl i
ngi
ngmycl awsto
getmybusiness.
 
Me:
Whi
chbusi
ness?Mydad'
s?
Cal
l
er:
It
'ssoobv
iousdear
Me:
Ify
ouwi
l
lev
engett
hem
Cal
ler
:Li
tt
legi
rldon'
tfl
att
ery
our
sel
fbecauseI
wil
lgetmyhalf
Me:
Justhol
dyourhor
sesmam pl
ease.
Ihungupbefor
eshecoul dsayany thing.That
momentwhenshet al
kedaboutr evengingto
takeawayourfat
her
'sbusiness.Idiscov er
ed
mydadhadmanypeopl et r
yingtost ealhis
l
egacythathehadbuil
tforusf orthemsel v
es. 
Iwasaggrevat
edatthefactpeopl
ewer
etr
ying
todest
roytheLonokonamebutweweregoing
tostr
iveourwayup,Idi
dn'tt
ellBandi
l
ethat
momentbecausehewasgoi ngtoaskmany
questi
onsaboutt
hiscal
l.Ifi
nishedpr
epar
ing
myselfandIwentdownstair
swi t
hmyhandbag
andcell
phone.
 
.
.
[
KHANYI
SO]
Mypar entsaskingtomeetupwi thSiziphi
we
wassomet hingwhichhappenedwi t
hout
warning.Itallst
art
edwithmysi sterThabisa
al
soknownasPal esawithherSot honame
seeingSiziphiweandIpictur
easmydi spl
ay
pict
ureonmyphone.I twasaf irstformy
parentstoaskt omeetmygi rlf
riend,Ididl
ove
Sizi
phiweandIal sowant edtointroduceherto
myf amilywhent hetimewasr i
ghtbutheyi t
waswor kcutshor tforme. 
Iwenttopi
ckherupandshelookedbeaut
if
ul
asalwayswi
thherey
eslooki
ngsimil
arto
Chi
neseey
es.
 
Me:
Myper
son
Si
zi
phi
we:
Mybet
terhal
f 
WesharedakissandIwasdr
ivi
ngmybr
other
's
cart
hathehadborrowedme
Me:
Mypar
ent
scan'
twai
ttoseey
ou
Si
zi
phi
we:
Whatdi
dyousayt
othem aboutme?
Me:
Not
hingi
tjusthappened 
Si
zi
phi
we:
Ify
ousayso
WechuckledandIdrov
etomyhomewhi chwas
i
nTy ger
burgj
ustafewstreet
sawayfrom
Amangele'
sIhopewestil
lrememberher
.Yeah?
Good! 
Wearri
vedatmyhomeandSi zi
phi
wewas
st
art
ingtohesi
tat
ebutIhel
dherhandsf
ir
mly
Me:
Rel
axt
hei
rar
eni
cepeopl
e
Si
zi
phi
we:
Okay
Sheslowlybr
eat
hedoutl
oud.Andwegotoutof
thecarthenwal
kedt
othehouse.
 
Me:
Mommy
!Wear
eback!
Mymom wasNol uthandoPi
l
layandmydad
wasLutherPi
l
laythei
rwerearar
ecombi
nati
on
ofSot
hoandXhosa.
Mom:
Kagi
so(
myot
hername)
wher
eisshe?
Si
zi
phiweslowlysteppedasi
det
oseemy
motherandtheysharedahug
Si
zi
phi
we:
Hel
l
o ma
Mom wassti
ll
stunnedbythebeaut
yof
Si
zi
phiweandshewasr eal
l
ybeauti
ful
.ButBae
i
shot!MyGod!
Mom: Wow!Wher edidyouf
indthi
sbeaut
if
ulgi
rl
andshedeservesanamewhi chgoesas
Nthabi
seng.Bathong! 
Iguessi
twasgoingt
obef asci
nati
ngaft
ernoon
wit
hmyf ami
lyandSi
ziphi
we/Nthabi
seng.
-
♡
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t33
[
SIZI
PHI
WE]
Lunchwi t
hthePi layfamilywasamazi ngfrom
eati
ngfoodt hatwasmadebyMr sPi l
ayandI
fel
twelcomedwi thwar m arms.Wewer e
seati
ngbehindt hedi ni
ngt abl
ehav i
ngachat ,
gett
ingtoknoweachot herbetterbuttherewas
somethingupwi thPal esashedi dn'
tseem t o
l
ikemet hatmuchbuti t'
swasherownchoi ce
tonotli
keme.Shet ookasi pfrom herjui
ce
whichwasi nagl assandst ar
tedtalki
ngtome.
Palesa:
Tel
lmeSizi
phi
we,whatdoy
ousee
yoursel
fasi
nthefut
ure?
Withal
lthepr
ideandj
oyt
hatIhadi
nsi
deofme
Ianswer
edher.
Me:Wel
lIseemysel
fasaChart
eredAccount
ant
andabusi
nessownert
omyf at
her'
s
compani
es 
Pal
esa:
Oh?That'
sgood.Sotell
whatdidyou
seewhenyoudeci
dedtodatemybr ot
her
?I
meanhe'sawel
l-
knownplayerandIdon'
tthi
nk
youmaybestr
ongtohandlehim
Ij
ustopenedmymouthtoshowconfusi
on
whichst
oppingwor
dstoescapef
rom my
mouth
Beaut
y(Khany
iso'
sMom):That
'
sinappr
opri
ate
Thabi
sa,whyareyoubei
nghardonthechi
ld?
Palesa:Mom!I '
m notbeinghardtoanyonehere.
I
'mj ustpi ssedthatKhanyisoand
Si
viwe( Khany i
so'sbrother
)areal
lowedtobri
ng
overthei rgir
lf
riendsbutwithmenoIcan'teven
bri
ngov eraf r
iend
Mv el
eli
(Khanyi
so'
sdad):Hey!That
'
snowayt o
speaktoy ourmot
her,sheisnotyourageor
fr
iend!
Palesasoundedasav eryrudegirlshedi
dn'
t
evencarehowherspeaki ngtoelderl
ypeopl
e
wasv erywrong.Khany i
so,Siv
iweandIwer e
j
ustlist
eningtotheircoversat
ionnoteven
ut
teringawor dtothem. 
Pal
esa:
I'
m outofher
e.Pl
easedon'
tcal
lordo
any
thi
ngtofindme.Peaceout
! 
Shepushedthechairawayf r
om thetablewit
h
herhandandmadeherwayt othekitchennot
evenatt
empt i
ngtoli
stentoherfatherspeak.
Beautyhadcoveredherfacewit
hherhands, I
guessshewasembar rasedtowhatThabi sa
hadsaidinf
rontofus.
 
Mvel
i:
Siziphi
we mychil
d,sor
ryaboutt
hati
twas
j
ustami sunder
standi
ng. 
Me:
It
'sokaySi
rIunder
stand.
Mv
eli
:
Pleasedon'
tcal
lmeSi
rref
ermeasdad
Me:
Okaydad
Ismi
l
edl
ooki
ngatt
hem.Soonceagai
nthe
conversat
ionstar
tedagai
n,Si
vi
wel ef
tIthinkhe
wasgoi ngoutorsomethi
ng.I
twasme, Mv el
eli
,
BeautyandKhany i
soseat
ingaroundthetable
andwewer et
alki
ng.
Mv
eli
:
Tel
lmeabouty
our
sel
fandf
ami
l
y
Me:I
'
m Sizi
phi
weLonokoandI'
mthedaught
er
ofMarv
inLonoko,
Ihaveabrot
herandt
hat
moreofit
Beaut
yandMv
eli
lookedateachot
hert
hen
backatme
Beaut
y:Mar
vinLonoko?Themanwhousedt o
ownTheEatrestaur
antinJohannesbur
gand
si
gneditov
ertohischil
drenwhenhepassedon?
Shehadmydad' sbi
orighti
nherf
ingerti
ps
becauseever
ythi
ngshesaidwastrue.Inodded
myheadt oanswerBeauty.
 
Mveli
:
Youmustbef
il
thyri
chbecausehehad
ownedmor
ethan4businessi
nandoutsi
dethe
count
ry
Khany
iso:
Dad!
 
Beaut
y:Let'
sskipt
hatt
opicbecauseKhany
iso'
s
dadwil
l betal
ki
nginbusi
nesstermsifwedont
l
eaveit
WeletoutalaughandMv el
iwasshaki nghis
headno.Idi
dhaveani ceti
mewi ththem, "
they"
wereni
cepeopleindeedandnothingseemed
fi
shyaboutt
hem andIhopei tst
ayslikethat.
 
Me:ThankyouMrandMr
sPf ort
heinvi
tat
iont
o
hav
el unchwi
thy
ouandIneedtogethome 
Beauty:
HawuNthabi,
youarenotevenst
ayi
ng
overforsomedesser
tthatIpr
epar
edspeci
all
y
foryou?
Me:
Icanst
ayi
fyoupr
epar
edi
tforme.
Icoul
dn'
tdisappoi
ntifaper
sonwhotookthei
r
ti
metomakesomet hi
ngspeci
alsoIdeci
dedto
stayj
ustf
orMr sP. 
Beaut
y:Babacany
oupl
easecomeandhel
pout
i
nthekitchen?
Shel
ookedatMv
eli
andsmi
l
e.
Mv
eli
:
Wit
hthatsmi
l
eIcan'
tsayno.
Hestoodupandf ol
l
owedBeautyi
ntot
he
ki
tchen.Iwasl
eftwit
hKhany
iso.
Me:
Yourpar
ent
sar
esomet
hingel
sei
nagood
wayt
hough 
Khany
iso:
Iknowhey
.
Hepul
ledmeclosertohi
m andIcoul
dseehe
want
edakissbadly
.
Me:No!Yourr
ent
scanwal
kinanymi
nut
efr
om
now
Khany
iso:
Rel
axt
heywont
.Ipr
omi
se
Me:
Okayf
ine
Ourli
psmetandIwast rembl i
ngbecauseIwas
afr
aidoneofhisparent
swoul dwalkinandsee
usinacti
on.Theymayseemeasal oosegir
l.
Wepulledoutbecausethekisswasget t
ing
damnintenseandwesatpr operl
ywithour
handscol
l
abor
atedundert
het
abl
e.
Mv eliandBeautycamewi t
hthedessertandwe
start
edeat i
ng,i
twasal sodel
ici
ous.Idecidedto
offertowashdi shesbutBeautyorMvelididn'
t
seet hathappening.
 
Khanyi
so:
Dadwouldyoupleaseborr
owmey our
cart
otakebab-sor
ryImeanNt habi
home?
Mv
eli
:
Taket
heBenzkey
s
Khany
iso:
AMGor
?
Mv
eli
:
Anyoft
hose
Khanyi
sostoodupandr
ushedtowhereverhe
wasgoing.Ial
sost
ooduptohel
pwiththe
di
shes 
Beauty:
Nthabimybaby ,
thankyouforagreeing
tomeetupwi thus.Sometimesit
'sawkwar dto
yourpeerstohavelunchwithy
ourboyfri
end's
parent
s
Me:I
t'
sokaymaandt
hanky
ouf
orhav
ingme
her
e
Beaut
y:Youar
ewel
come
Wesharedahugt ogether
.Inoti
cedthatMv el
i
andBeautyhadsawadaught er-
in-
law f
rom me.
Imeanbeinggiv
ent hename" Nt
habiseng"to
ever
ythi
ngelsei
fyoucanr el
atetowhatI '
m
sayi
ng.
Khany
iso:
Let
'sgo 
Me:
Seey
ouagai
npar
ent
s.By
e
Them:
Bye 
Ifol
lowedbehi ndKhanyi
sot othecar.Wewent
toawhi teMercedesBenzAMGwhi chwas
i
ndeedabeaut if
ulcar
,Khanyisoopenedthe
doort hepassangerdoorformet henwentto
hissideanddr oveoff
. 
Khanyi
so:
Thanky
ouf
oragr
eei
ngt
omeetup
wit
hthem l
ove
Me:
It
'sapl
easur
ebabe
Weshar
edakisswhichwaspassi
onat
eagain.I
pul
l
edoutbecauseIknewhemaybetr
igger
ed 
Me:
Takemehome!
Khany
iso:
Iam.
Hewaspl
ayi
ngSphect
uct
ulaandDj
Nav
es
f
eat
uri
ngZai
nSAxIDo
Khanyiso:
"Api ct
uretel
lsat housandwordsthat
Ilov
ey ou,Ireall
ydobutt hereisnoneedforme
tosayallthat.Iwil
lshowy out hatIl
oveyou,I
do,Ido,Idoohy esIdolovey ou"
Iwassmi
l
ingt
othesi
dewhi
l
eli
steni
ngt
ohi
m
si
ng
Me:Youj
ustoneni
ggawhoknowshowt
o
r
ejoi
cemyhearti
ndif
fer
entway
s
Khany
iso:
AndI
'
m happyt
oheart
hosewor
ds
fr
om you
Hesaidt
hatpar
kingt
hecari
nfr
ontoft
he
apar
tments.
 
.
.
[
KHAZI
MLA]
I
tmaysoundcr az yt
hatI'
m suddenlypregnant
butIhavebeendi sagreei
ngtodot hedeedwi t
h
Bandil
e.Ther ewereti
meswher epeople
thoughtthebabymaynotbeBandi le'
sbecause
wenev erslepttoget
herbutthetrut
hwashe
wasmybabydaddy .
 
Aftert heacci denthewasi nvolv
edinandbei ng
hospi tal
isedf orcloseto3mont hsmademe
thi
nkt wice.Ithoughtwhati fhemaynev er
recov eragai n?Evenifhewakesupandhe
decidest odat eanothergi
rlandleavemest i
l
l
holdingback.Iof tensaidhewassel fi
shbut
thatwaswr ongofmebecauseInev ertoldhim
aboutmyf ami l
ycustoms, wellmyfamily
alway ssai dwemustmakei ttotheageof21
sti
llav i
rginandy ouwi l
lbegivenacaror
anythingy oudesire.
Thet
imewhenBandi
leheardIwasexpecti
ng,
hewasr
eal
lyamazedbecauseweonlytogether
onceaf
terhewasr
eleasedf
rom hospi
tal
.
 
SoitwasaSat
urdayaft
ernoonandIwasi
nmy
fl
atwit
hmybestfri
endNqobil
eZunguhav
inga
tal
k
Nqobi
l
e:Fr
iendar
eyouposi
ti
vet
hat
'
sBandi
l
e's
chi
l
d?
Shepl
acedherhandonmyf
latt
ummyand
st
art
edmovingherhand
Me:
Ifi
twasn'
tyoumayhav
eknownbynow!
Nqobi
l
e:Butf
ri
endno.I
tcan'
tbe 
Whywasevery
onesuspect
ingsomethingabout
t
hisbaby
?Evenmyfri
endforgoodness'sake!
Me:Nqobi
leyouknowI '
mthatper
sonwhocan't
hi
desomet hi
ngforev
erandIhavealway
sbeen
l
oyaltoBandi
leeversi
ncewestart
eddati
ng 
Nqobi
l
e:That
'st
ruebecausei
fanot
hermanwas
her
eIwouldhaveknow
Me:
Exact
ly
Aknockcamet hroughthedoorandatthe
sametimeitopened.Speakofthedevi
landhe
wastherei
nani nstance
Bandi
l
e:Ladi
es
Hekissedmyf
oreheadandsatont
heopposi
te
couch
Us:
Hey
Nqobi
l
e:Imustgetgoi
ng,
seey
'al
lar
ound 
Me:
Byef
ri
end
Bandi
l
e:Cheer
s
Shetookhersl
i
ngbagandl
eft
.Si
l
encef
il
ledt
he
room
Me:
Whatdoy
ouwant
?I'
mti
redbabes
Bandi
l
e:I
sitmi
ne?
Me:
What
'sy
our
s?
Bandi
l
e:Thebabyi
sitmi
ne?
Me:
Yeswhoel
sewoul
ditbe?
Bandi
le:
Idon'
tknowmay
beoneofy
our"
hidden
boyf
ri
ends"
Hemadei nver
tedcommasint
heai
rtosymbol
sarcasm.Hewasabitpar
anoi
dbyt
hisbaby
saga
Me:Ther
eisnooneel
seIhavesl
eptwi
th
besi
desyou.Tr
ustmeonthat
Bandi
l
e:Letgoandt
akeaDNAt
estt
obesur
e
i
t'
smine
Iwasn'
tfeel
i
ngscar
edorany
thi
ngbutwor
ri
ed
aboutmyunbor
nbabybei
ngindanger
Me:
Can'
tyouwai
tunt
ili
t'
sbor
n?
Bandi
l
e:NoIneedt
oknownow!
Me:Butthatmaycausedamaget
omy
dev
elopingbabyandIwon'
tbeabl
etosur
viv
eif
any
thinghappenstoit
Bandi
le:
Not
hing 
wil
lhappent
othedamnbaby
.
Stopbei
ngacry-
baby
Me:I
fanythinghappensjustknowthat,
Iwish
andpraythatyouwillhaveguil
tbui
l
tinsi
deof
youforki
l
linganinnocentbaby
Bandi
l
e:Pheesh!
 What
ever
s.Let
'
sgo 
Idon'
tthi
nkBandil
ehear danyt
hinghesaidt
o
mebecausethewayhewasanswer i
ngwas
dif
fer
ent,
ver
ydiff
erent.Fol
lowingtheor
ders
summonedbyBandi l
eIf ol
lowedhim wi
thmy
phoneandearpl
ugstohi scar.
 
Hestart
edthecaranddroveofftothehospi
tal
.
Thedri
vewaslongerthanIexpectedi
twould
be.Fi
nal
lywearri
vedatthehospit
alandgot
att
endedbyafemaledoctorwhowasDr
McKenzie
Doctor
:Iseey
oudeci
dedt
ocomeagai
nMr
Lonoko,what
'swr
ong?
Bandi
le:
Wecamet otakeaDNAt estf
ort
he
unbor
nbabythatsheiscar
ryi
ng
Doct
or:
Wow!Don'
tyouwantt
owai
tunt
ili
t'
s
bornbecausecompl
icat
ionsmayoccurdur i
ng
thepregnancy
?Thebabymay beasti
ll
-bornat
bir
thorshecanhaveami scar
ri
ageduringthe
tri
mesters
Bandi
l
e:Weunderstandal
lthepr
obl
emst hat
mayhappenwit
ht hechil
dcanwepleasedoit?
Doct
or:
OkayMrLonoko,
justf
oll
owme
Iwasqui etasamousej ustl
ist
eningtothem.I
didn'
thav ethest r
engthtof i
ghtBandil
e
becauseIwoul dbest ar
tingawar, wefol
lowed
thedoctortoar oom wher eourbl
oodsampl es
weretaken.Idon' tevenwantt oexplai
nthe
procedurewhi chwasdonet otakebloodf r
om
mybaby .
Doct
or:
Yourr
esult
swil
lbebacki
naweekanda
l
ett
erwil
lbedel
i
veredt
oyourhouse
Bandi
le:
Can'
twegeti
ttoday
?Icanpaydoubl
e
theamount
Doct
or:
Ify
oucanwai
tforaf
ewhour
stheni
t'
sa
deal
Bandi
l
e:I
t'
sseal
ed
Thedoctorl
eftwit
ht hebloodsampl esandI
waslef
twithBandil
e, Ineverknewthathecan
al
sobeev i
lasheisbutl et'
sfacereali
tyal
l
humanshav etwosidesbot hgoodandbad.
Thei
rwon'talway
sst ayasAngel sforeter
nit
y.
Bandi
le:Khazi
mlaIam notdoi
ngthi
stohur
tyou
orany
t hingi
t'
sjustIneedt
oknow
Me: Youshoul
dknowbettert
hanthis!Bandil
eI
havebeennot hi
ngbutl
oyalt
oy ouevenwhen
youwer einhospi
tal
.Nomancant akey our
placebutheyitshowshowar eal
jerkyouare!
(Shouti
ng)
Bandi
l
e:Pl
easedon'
ttal
kli
ket
hat
.
Me:
Justl
eav
emeal
one.(
Scr
eami
ng)
Isai
dthati
nser
ti
ngmyear
plugsi
ntomyear
s
andIcl
osedmyey es.
 
<THREEHOURSPASSED>
Thedoctorcamewithabrownenvel
opeand
handeditt
oBandil
ewhor i
ppedi
topen.His
eyesgrewwideeachsecondhereadthr
ough
thel
ett
er
Bandil
e:BabeI'
m sososor
ryf
ornotbel
i
evi
ng
you.Pl
easef or
giveme 
I
fitwasn'
thisbabyBandil
ewouldn'
thav
esai
d
t
hat.Soit
'soff
ical
heisthefat
herofmychi
ld
Me:
Ineedt
imet
othi
nkaboutmef
orgi
vi
ngy
ou
Doctor
:Letmeleavebot
hofyouandt
he
t
ransacti
onhappenedMrLonoko
Bandi
l
enoddedandt
heDoct
orl
eft
.
Me:
CanIpl
easehav
ethecarkey
s?
Bandi
l
e:Canwet
alkaboutt
his?
Me:
Ther
eisnot
hingt
otal
kabout
.Whati
sdone
i
sdone.
Icoul
dseehewantedt
oshedatearbutIcar
ed
l
essabouthi
m andhi
ssor
ryst
atements.Iwas
tor
ninsideIcouldn'tbeli
evemyownboy f
ri
end
wouldthinkImayhav echeatedonhi
m butt
his
wasever ychall
enget hatl
if
ecamewithandI
needtoendor sethatforthesakeofmyunborn
baby.
..

-
♡
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t34
Itfeltli
ket hisSatur
dayaf t
er noonwasn'tgoi
ng
toendany ti
mesoon, Ididn'tfeell
i
kegoingto
rel
axbyt hebeachev enthoughi twasjusta
wal king-dist
ancef r
om theapar tments.I
coul dn'tcontactThandazwabecauseofher
l
osi nghercel l
phoneandal soAmangel e(My
otherf riendifyoudon'tremember )whowas
busybei ngamom t oherchi ldandalso
Khany i
sowhowasunabl etokeepmecompany
becauseofbei
ngunavai
labl
e.Hedi
dn'
tsaythat
nobutthatwhatIhadpi
ctur
edinmyhead.
 
Iwassi ttingont hecouchandIwaswat ching
somer ealityshowswhi leeat i
ngpopcor n, I
hear dt hedoorsl am openandcl oseatthe
samet i
met hatmademej umpal it
tl
e.Wai ting
foraf ewmi nut es,
Bandileappear edfrom t he
kitchenhol dinga125gofSi mbaChi ps( Creamy
Cheddar )i nhi shandsandt hrewhi mselfont he
opposi t
ecouchnextt omi ne.Iknewt hewayhe
waseat i
ngt hechipssomet hingwasup!I
not i
cedt hatt hoseareev eryperson'schips
whi chcal mt hem doneespeci all
yi nti
meof
distress.Youmaychuckl eal i
tt
lebutit'strue!
Hedi dn'tgr eetoranything,may beIwasj usta
ghosti nhi sf l
at!
Me:
SoI
'
minv
isi
ble?
Helookedatmethenbackatt
hetel
evi
sion.I
swit
cheditof
fbecauseIwast
ir
edofBandil
e'
s
tact
ics.
Hi
m:Duude!Whydi
dyoudot
hatf
or?
!
Me:
Youdi
dn'
tev
ensayawor
d!What
'swr
ong?
Bandi
l
e:Not
hing 
andpl
easeswi
tchont
het
.v
Me:
Noway
!Fi
rstt
ell
mewhat
'
sgoi
ngon?
Him:
It'
stoodr
amat
icandmaybeupset
ti
ngt
o
hear
Ir
oll
edmyey
esbecausemyl
i
fewasal
sof
ull
of
dr
ama
Me:
Justst
artt
alki
ng!
 
Hi
m:Okayfine!DidItel
lyouKhazi
mlais
pr
egnant?Sotoday,Iwentovertohercr
iband
westar
tedarguing
Hewaslyi
ng.Noonewi
l
ljustst
artar
gui
ng
wi
thoutar
eason.
 
Me:
Thatai
n'
tev
encl
oset
obei
ngt
rue
Him:
Fine!Imadehert
akeaDNAtestj
ustt
o
knowifthebabyi
smineornot
Mymi
ndwasj
ustt
wist
ed.Idi
dn'
tev
enknow
whatt
osaynext
.
Me:
Huh?
Him:WetookaDNAt
estwhi
l
ethebabyi
sst
il
l
devel
opi
ngokay?
Me:What?Doy ouknowcompli
cat
ionsmay
occurdur
ingsis'
Khazi
mla'
spr
egnancy?
!What
's
wrongwithyou?
Hi
m:Howdoy
ouknow?
Me:Iwi
l
lansweryoulat
er!Butbr
othatwasj
ust
bei
ngacompleteidi
ot 
Bandi
l
e:Don'
tmakemef
eel
badasIal
readyam.
Me:
That
'sgoodt
ohear
!
Heslowlysuckledli
keababy.ButIdi
dn'tcar
e
becausehetreatedaladybadandIcan'tj
ust
keepquietwi
thmybi gmout ht
hatIhave. 
Bandi
l
e:Goandpacky
ourbagswear
egoi
ngt
o
ECtomorr
ow
Me:
Sosoon?
Hi
m:YesIneedt
ohav
eaf
reshst
artokay
?
Me:
Iheary
ousol
etmego
Hi
m:AndIwi
l
lpr
epar
edi
nner
Me:
Cool
Irushedupst ai
rsbecausethedinnerwason
Bandi l
eandIhadt ojustpackmyt hings.I
startedtohesit
atebecauseIdidn'tknowwhat
woul dhappenwhenI 'minQueenst ownbut
thingswill
/cangosmoot hthatside. 
.
.
[
BANDI
LE]
Youmayf i
nditweirdthatKhazimlaispregnant
alsodidI.Someofmyf ri
endswer ealr
eady
tell
i
ngmet ol
eav eherbecauseshedoesn' t
wantt ogetscrewedbutIknewonedayshe
maycomet ohersenses.IlovedKhaziml awit
h
myal lbutsomethingswerelefttobeinthe
dark,shewasn'tthemaincauseofmyacci dent.
Irememberbei
ngtol
dthatIdidn'
tstopatthe
robot
sandamassivetr
uckhitmycar ,doct
ors
wereactual
l
yst
arni
shedthatIsurv
ivedthat
havoc.
 
Letmegetbackt owher eIbelieveKhazimla
mayhav ebecamepr egnant.I
twasj ustafi
ne
dayandIdecidedt ot akeadrivet henendedup
atBae'sapar
tment .Okayf i
ne,wewer esit
ti
ngin
theli
vingr
oom talkingaboutt hingswi t
hour
bodiesphysi
cal
lyengagedt ogetherandwe
play
edwi t
hourfinger s. 
Babe:YouknowwhenyouIt
houghty
ouwer
e
nevergoi
ngtomakeit
Me:
Whatdoy
oumeanbyt
hat
?
Her:
Youlyi
ngi nt
hathospi
talbedandy ou
l
ookedhelplessf
or3mont hsandl ooki
ng
hel
plessi
tjustbr
okemyhear tthatwemay
nev
erseeeachot heragai
n
Me:
ButbabeyouknowI'
m madeofst
eelbut
l
ookonthebr
ightsi
de,
I'
m al
i
vesti
l
lwit
hy ou 
Icuppedherf
acei
nmyheadwhi
l
eper
kingher
l
ips
Her:Iknowanditmademer eali
sethatIl
ove
andneedy ouinmyli
fe.Youalsothebestthi
ng
thathappenedtomeandpleasealway sknow
that
Me:
Whyar ey
ousoundi
ngl
i
keaper
soni
sgoi
ng
t
odiesoon?
Her
:UphambeneBandi
l
e.Ican'
tdi
esoear
ly
Me:
Youwi
l
lgetpuni
shedf
orcal
l
ingmecr
azy
!
Shel
etoutachuckl
eandst
oodup 
Her:
Iwouldl
iket
oseethathappeni
ng!(
She
pushedherl
i
pstoget
her)
Me:
Thi
swi
l
lhappen!
 
Istart
edchasingheraroundthefl
atandcaught
herwhilepicki
ngherupinmyar ms.We
supri
sedour sel
veswhenourlipsmadea
deli
catesensati
onwithourtonguesembraci
ng
everysingl
emomentwehadt ogether
,Il
ether
standonherf
eetwhi
lesl
owlysqueezi
ngher
buttandshewasl
ett
ingoutsweetl
it
tl
emoans.
 
Istartedmov i
ngherandIt oherroom whi l
e
kissi
ngofcour se,ourcl
otheswentf ly
ingoff
from ourbodies.Wegott ogottoherr oom and
Irestedheront hebedteasingherskirtoff,
Khaziml aseemedt obeenjoyingthemoment
becauset herewasno" Bandil
eI'm notreadyfor
this"
,"Weshoul dn'
tdothisit
'sasi n(
Shewasa
trueChr i
sti
anandal waysrespectedherbodyi f
Imaybespeci f
ic)"
.
Me:
Arey
our
eadyf
ort
his?
Khazi
mla:
Won'
tyoust
opwi
tht
hequest
ions?
Pl
ease
IguessIwill
takethatasay esmay be,we
unbuckledmybeltwithmyjeandr oppingonthe
fl
oor.Iseper
atedherlegswhilegetti
ngin
betweenthem, It
ookoffherbrathenst ar
ted
pl
ay i
ngwithherti
tsshewasenj oyinghersel
f
fr
om thewayshemov edherbody .Mov i
ng
downf r
om herbr
east
sIslowl
ymadeci r
cles
aroundhercooki
eandshewasalready
stret
chi
ngmybackwithhernai
ls.
 
Thatwasjustthebeginni
ng, af
terdoingthose
secti
ons.Mygunwasal r
eadyer ecti
ngandI
remov edmyboxersthenslowlyi nser
tedmy sel
f.
Istart
edwiththebasi
cswhi chwasgoi ngup
anddownandmal eswouldagr ee,Imadesur eI
reachedeverycor
nerinher.
Her
:AhhBandi
l
e!Pl
easepul
lout
!
Shewassqueezingmyhandt
ightandat
ear
escapedf
rom herey
es 
Me:
Thepai
nwi
l
leasej
ustbepat
ientf
orme 
Her
:Ahh,
I-wi
l
lt-
ry!
Painwaswr itt
enalloverherfaceIknowitwas
painandallthatev
er yhumanbei ngwil
l
eventual
l
yhav etodoi t.Aft
erthesecondround
Ididn'
tpull
outandKhazi mlawastryi
ngallshe
couldtoremov emef rom herbecauseshewas
i
ndeep,
int
ensepai
nandIr
emov
edmy
sel
f.
 
Khazi
mla:
Wear
enev
erdoi
ngt
hisagai
n!
Me:
Butbabe-
Shecutmeof
f
Khazi
mla:
Shhl
et'
sjustsl
eepokay
Shepeckedmylipsthencl osedmyey es,i
twas
adayImar kedi
nthecalender .Ineverknewshe
mayalsochangeherhear tandunder standme
butanythi
ngwouldeventuallyhappenwi thmy
Sweetness.
 
Ihopewef oundoutwhatmadeKhazi
mlat
o
carr
ymychi l
dandtotel
lthet
rur
hitwas
amazing!

-
♡
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t35
Thedaycameandwewer ereadyt ohitther oad.
Iwasabi toverwhelmedandt hat '
swhen
every t
hingstart
edt of l
ashback, Icouldn'tret ai
n
my selfbutBandi l
ewast her
egi vi
ngout
cour ageouswor dslike"Nothingwi l
lhappent o
you"" NonzamehaschangedandIpr omi sey ou
myent i
relif
ethatnot hi
ngwi l
l harmy ou".We
l
oadedourl uggagei ntothetrunkandwedr ov e
off,soIputonmyear phonesbecausesi tt
ingi n
oneposi t
ioninthecarwasl iterall
yboring.SoI
l
ookedatBandi lewithsomet hi ngspinning
aroundmyhead.  
Bandi
l
e:What
?
Me:Youknowyoursi
tuat
ionwi
thKhazi
mlai
s
st
il
lspi
nningar
oundmyhead
Bandi
le:
Youst
il
lther
e?It
houghtwecl
osedt
hat
subj
ect
Me:YeswedidbutI
'
m sti
ll
confusedhowy
ou
wouldthi
nkt
hebabyisnotyours?
Hesi
ghedandshookhi
sheadt
henl
ookedat
meandqui
ckl
ybackont
her
oad
Bandi
l
e:I
t'
sal
ongst
ory
Me:Andwewillbestuckt
ogetherforhour
sin
t
hiscarsoIsuggestyoust
artspeaking
Bandil
e:Okayher
ewego, whenIwas
hospit
ali
zedKhaziml
awasseenwi thaman
aroundtowntheyhavebeenseentoget
her
mor et
han4t i
mesatar est
uar
antandKhazi
mla
cl
imbingoutofhiscar
Me:Soy oudi
gest
edthatt
heywer
ehav
ingan
af
fairorsomethi
ng?
Bandi
l
e:Yeswhywoul
dI?
 
Icl
appedmyhands.
 
Me:Whati
fitwasherbr
other
?Fr
iend?Comeon
Bandi
l
e
Hi
m:Soyouunderst
andwhyIhadmi
xedup
f
eel
ingsaboutt
his?
Me:
YesIdounder
standwher
eyoucomef
rom
andpleasedomeafav
ourbysuppor
ti
ngt
he
chi
ld.Wehaveal
otofmoneyImeanR2mill
i
on
i
t'
st oomuch!
 
Bandi
l
e:IknowheybutDadhadt oomuch
moneytosustainhi
m butcoul
dn'
ttakecareof
hi
sowndaught erandIdon'
twanttofol
lowin
hi
sfootst
eps
Thattear
edmeupi nmyi nsidebuti
twasthe
honesttr
uthandIcoul
dn'trunawayfrom i
t.I
cl
earedmyt hr
oatandstart
edt al
ki
ng
Me:YouknowIr ecei
vedacall
yest
erdayf
rom
somel adytel
l
ingmesheisgoingtopul
la
rev
engeonusandgetMar vin'
s(mydad)
businesses
Bandi
le:
Idon'tbeli
ev eit,Ial
sogotthesamecal
l
fr
om alady.Idon'tev ent hi
nkIhavet
he
st
rengthtobef i
ghtingf orthosebusi
nesses
Ihel
dhi
shandwhi
chwasont
hegearbox
Me:
Youhav
eto,
webot
hhav
eto.Wemust
secur
etheLonokolegacyandl
etnoonet
ake
contr
olbesi
desus
Him:It
hinkyouhav eal
readyf
orseent
hef
utur
e
ofthebusinesses
Me:
Especi
all
yTheEatIhav
e 
Bandi
l
e:That
'sgood.
 
Wecontinuedtal
kingespecial
lyaboutthe
busi
nessesandwedi dsomest opsatgarages.
Myphonewasr i
ngingandluckil
yBandilewas
buyi
ngtake-awaysfrom St
eersandt hecall
er
wasKhany i
soandIanswer ed.
 
Me:
Kay
Peedear
Hi
m:Myl
ovehowar
eyou?
Me:
I'
mfi
net
hanksandy
ou?
 
Him:
Wherear
eyou?Iwoul
dli
kef
orust
ogoout
andcat
chamovi
e
Me:
Ican'
tbabeI
'
m outoft
ownbutt
hanksf
or
t
heoff
er
Him:
No!Dadwasev
enki
ndbyal
l
owi
ngust
o
usehi
scar 
Me:
That
'ssweetofhi
m butIcan'
tbabe
Him:
Iknowmunchki
nshav
easaf
etr
ipokay
andIl
oveyou
Me:
Il
ovey
out
oo
Wemadeki sssoundsovert
hephoneandhung
up.Whoknewl ov
ewassomet hi
ngever
wonderf
ul tofi
ndinhumankind?ImeanIcoul
d
seeafuturewithKhanyi
so.SoBandi
lecame
wit
hthef oodandwegotbackont heroad.

(
HOURSLATER)

Wef i
nall
yarri
vedinQueenst ownthentook
anotherhourt
othev i
llage,
wegott heand
peoplewerestar
ingatusmay betheywerenot
usedtoseeingacarlikethatpassingby.Sowe
gottoNonzame'sy ar
dandonet hi
ngthatnever
changedwherechickensroamingaroundt
he
yard.SoBandi
lestoppedhiscarandwegotoff
,
Anov uy
ocamer aci
ngtous.Sheseemedmor e
thi
nnerthanbefor
e
Anov
uyo:
Hommi
es
Us:
Hey
 
Anovuyo:
Whydi
dn'
tyousayy
ouwer
ecomi
ng
thi
sside?
Bandi
l
e:Wedeci
dedy
est
erdayt
ocomet
hissi
de
Anov
uyo:
Okay
.Mom i
sthehousel
et'
sgo
Wef oll
owedbehi ndherandt hehousewasa
degradingsceneryIdon'tthi
nkthegir
lswere
doinganywor karoundt hehouse.Nonzame
wasr esti
ngont hecarpetandwassot hinl
i
ke
shewashav i
ngsomet hing
Me:
Nonzame?
 
Sherai
sedherheadandherey
eshadpushed
backonthei
rsocket
sandshewasreal
l
ythin
Nonzame:
Sizi
phi
we?Bandi
l
e? 
Shetr
iedst
andi
ngupbutfai
l
edandwehugged
herwhil
eshewassi
tt
ingonthecar
pet
Nonzame:
Whydi
dn'
tyousayy
ouwher
ecomi
ng?
Me:
Wej
ustwant
edi
ttobeasupr
ise 
Nonzame:That
'sni
ceandy
oual
lgr
ownup,
I
missedy
ou
Bandi
l
e:Real
l
ydi
dyou?
Me:
Bandi
l
edon'
tst
artpl
ease
Nonzame:
Idi
dandIhav
ebeenr
eal
l
ysi
ck
Youcoul
dtel
lbyt
hewayshewast
rembl
i
ng
Me:
What
'swr
ong?
Nonzame:HI
Vhasbeent heprobl
em, If
oundout
twoweeksagothatI'
mi nst
agethreeandit
's
hasalr
eadymul
tipl
i
edi nmybody
Bandi
l
e:Whocoul
dhav
egi
veni
ttoy
ou?
Nonzame:
Amant
hatIwasseei
ngaf
terDumani
andIthoughthewassentfr
om Heav
enbuthe
wasactuall
yarapi
stfr
om Li
mpopoandwas
runni
ngawayf r
om pol
i
ce
Shetookasipf
rom herwat
erwhi
chwasnext
toherandIwasdevi
stat
edatt
hesit
e
Nonzame:Thedoct
orevensaidImaydiesoon
andIneedtocomecleanofthingsIdi
dinthe
past
.Iwouldneedever
yonetogatheraroundso
wecantalk.
 
That'
sonethingIdisl
ikeofpeopl
ethattheir
daysareoutnumberedonEar t
h.Imeant r
auma,
hatr
edandf earwil
lbecastedoutandI'
m notin
theri
ghtf
ulposit
iontostandthat
Bandi
l
e:Shoul
dIcal
ltheot
her
stocome?
Nonzame:
Iwoul
dreal
l
yappr
eci
atet
hat
Bandil
estoodupf rom thesof
atocal
lthegi
rl
s
andIwasqui te.TheycameandNonzame
star
tedtal
king.
Nonzame:
Sizi
phi
wemychi
l
d,t
her
eis
somethi
ngIneedtot
ell
you.I
'
m noty
our
bi
ologi
calmot
her!
Me:
What
?
Mywhol ewor
ldjustf
rozeandthesentence
Nonzamekeptrepeat
inginmyears.Everyone
tol
dmeaboutthisbutIneverl
i
stened!Why
doesithav
etobeme?

-
♡
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t36
Il
istenedt oNonzamespeakandnowor dwas
abletoescapef rom mymout hbecauseofa
l
umpbl ockingmyt hr
oat.Iwassurr
ondedwit
h
Bandile'
sembr acearoundmewhi chwerehi
s
armswr appedaroundme.
Nonzame:
Iwasgoi
ngt
osel
lyout
oasangoma
(
tradi
ti
onalheal
er)sowecouldgetmoney.But
t
hatdidn'
thappenbecauseyourbrot
hergoti
nto
t
hemi ddl
eandwecoul dn'
tproceedwit
hthat
. 
Ij
ustfrozedidshehat
emet hatmuchshe
act
uallydothat
?ButIwasn'
tshockbythat
Nonzamewascapabl eofdoi
ngthose,
tear
s
werejustst
reamingoutofmyeyes
Me:WhatdidIeverdot
oyouthaty
ouwoul
dsel
l
yourhusband'
sdaught
ery
ourownchi
l
d? 
Shejustlookedatmewi
tht
he"
I'
m sor
ry"
expr
ession
Bandi
l
e:Ar
eyouev
enar
elat
ivet
ous?
 
Sheshookherheadno.Ist
oodupr
eadyt
o
l
eavethel
ivi
ngroom
Nonzame:Wherear
eyougoi
ng?Imustf
ini
sh
t
ell
ingyouthi
s
Me:
Ineedf
reshai
r.Ican'
tev
enbr
eat
he
Bandi
l
e:Justsi
tdown!
 
IsatdownassoonasBandi
l
esai
d"si
tdown"
Nonzame:AsIwassaying,
I'
m notevenclose
beingarel
ati
ve.Iwasawomant hatyourfat
her
askedtotakecareofy
ouwhilehewasout si
de
thecountr
y
Me:
ButIdon'
tgetwhyy
oudeci
dedt
omi
str
eat
meli
kethat
!
Nonzame:
Sizi
,Iwasadvi
cedbyaf r
iendthatI
shoul
ddothistoyouaf
tery
ourdadandIget
marri
edwhi
chseemedt obesucessful
Bandi
l
e:Soyoutr
yingt
osayt
hat
,youanddad
weremarr
ied?
Nonzame:
Yeswewer
e
Me:
Thenwhendi
dyoust
artdat
ingDumani
?
Her:
Wewer enotevendati
ng,hewaspay
ingme
tosl
eepwithyouanditwasgoodmoney
comingi
n.Icouldn'
tsaynobecausey
ourdad
l
eftuspenny-
less.
Me:
Wow!Sohedi
dn'
twantany
thi
ngt
odowi
th
me?
Nonzamequi
ckl
yhel
dmyhandandIl
etherbe
Her
:Heyi
t'
snotl
i
ket
hat
Me:
Thenwhati
sit
?
Her:
Yourbiological
mot herwaspl anni
ngtoki
ll
youandyourf ather
,Ithinktheyhadaterr
it
ory
f
ightabouttheirbusinesses.
Nowt hatwasbeyondcr azy
!Myownmom
attempt i
ngtomurderme?Somehuman
creaturescanbemy steri
oustounr
avel
.Tear
s
wer eplayi
ngahuger oleinmyspaceandI
couldn'tcont
rol
them
Bandi
l
e:Doy
ouknowany
thi
ngaboutt
hecur
se?
Nonzame:Idon'tevenwanttot
alkaboutthat
!I
wasalsotheper sonwhopromotedthecurse
andIevenregretdoingt
hattoyou
Iclappedmyhandsandwipedmyt
ear
sthen
stareddeepi
ntoherey
es
Me:It
hinkyouaret
hedevi
li
nt hefl
eshI
'
m done
l
ist
eni
ngt othi
sdepr
essi
ngish. 
Iremov edmy selffrom Bandil
eandst arted
runningf rom t helounget oreachtheout side.I
washur tl ikedeepl yhurt,f
ir
stlymyownmom
wouldev enwantt okil
lme.Nonzamei snot
evenscar edt oconf essthatshehadl aidahand
i
nt hedr eadf ul eventshappeninginmyl ifebut
shef i
nallycameoutcl ean.Ilookedaround
tryi
ngtof i
ndaspotwher eIcoul dhi
deandI
heardBandi lecal l
ingmecount l
ess,Ihadt ofind
aplacewher eIcoul descapet hereali
tyofl i
fe.
Isawaqui etpl
acewhichwassituat
edout
side
they ar
dandIhidther
e.Li
steni
ngtomymusi c,
tearswerespeaki
ngformeandt heydi
dn'
teven
givemeabr eak.
 
Voi
ce:
Sot
hisi
sal
soy
ourhi
dingpl
ace?
 
Il
ookedupandtherewasthi
schocol
ate
ski
nnedguyst
andinguponme.
Me:
Ij
ustsawi
ttoday
Guy:Whywoul
dabeaut
if
ulgi
rlbesi
tt
ingal
one,
cr
ying?
Hesatnextt
omeandwi
pedt
ear
sfr
om my
ey
es
Me:
Ineedt
ojustcr
y 
Guy
:I
fyousayso,
I'
m Tshepoandy
ouar
e? 
Me:Si
zi
phiwe(
weshookhands)soy
oual
so
comehere?
Tshepo:
Yes,
whenI
'
m st
ressedori
nneedt
obe
al
one 
Me:
Canr
elat
e
Wewer etal
kingunti
lIheardAnov
uyoand
Simamkelecall
ingoutmyname.Theysawme
withTshepoandsuddenlySimastar
tedgoi
ng
crazyIt
hinkshewascr ushi
ngonTshepo
becausehewasahotguy
Anovuy
o:Wehavebeentext
ing,
call
i
ngand
doi
ngallmeasur
estogetyoubutnothi
ng 
Me:
Ij
ustneededsomet
imeal
one
Simamkele:
Let
's 
gohomeguy
satl
eastt
ryt
o
reconci
l
iat
ewit
hmom
Me:
IfIwi
l
lbeabl
etodoso
Anov
uyo:
Pleasedoso
Tshepo:
That
'smycuet
oleav
eyou.Seey
ou
aroundl
adi
es
Us:
Bye
Hedi
sappear
edi
ntot
hinai
randIwasl
eftwi
th
t
hegi
rl
s
Si
mamkel
e:Let
's 
gohomepl
ease
Me:
Okayf
ine
Theyhel
pedmest
andupandwewal kedhome,
Iwasfeel
i
ngabi
thappyatl
eastIwastal
ki
ngto
thegi
rl
s.
WegothomeIcouldsmellfoodbei
ngcooked
f
rom outsi
dethey
ard.WegotinandNonzame
wastry
ingall
shecoulddi
shuphelpedby
Bandile,
weknowthatsomet imesfoll
owing
fr
iendscansomet
imesr esultinbadconseques
afterandIwaswi
l
lingtoforgiveher.
 
Nonzame:
Ever
yonesi
tdownandl
et'
seat
Wedidascommanded, Iwasn'
tgoi
ngtohol
d
gr
udgesfor
everandIneededtofor
giv
e
Nonzamenomat t
erwhat. 
Westart
edt alki
ngtoapointwher
eever
yone
wasexpressingthei
rfeel
i
ngswhichwas
t
heramaticforme.
Nonzame:Iwouldli
ketotakethisopport
uni
ty
andsay,Si
ziphi
weI'mverysorryforthewayI
treat
edyou.Ihopeyoi
finditi
ny ourhear
tto
forgi
ve.
 
Shoul
dIforgiv
eher?ButIthi
nkIhavemademy
mindonthat!Butagai
n,coul
dherapol
ogycl
ose
al
lexposedwounds?

-
♡
Sor
ryi
fanyer
ror
soccur
s 
[
06/
04,
23:
24]Ron:
APoi
sonedSoul

I
nser
t37
Icamet oapoi ntwher eIdecidedt oforgiv
e
Nonzamebecausei twon' tsolveany t
hingifI
holdgrudgesagai nstherf oreverandt hatwil
l
alsoaffectmywel l-being,soIwokeupt henext
daywi t
haspi nni ngheadIt hinkitwast he
effect
sofcr ying.Bandi l
ewassl eepingont he
fl
oorwhi l
eIsl eptont hesinglebed, Iwentto
brushmyt eethout sideandIhear dSimamkel e'
s
sonKhani yolecal l
ingme
Hi
m:Abi
zamakhuy
u!(
Grandmai
scal
l
ingy
ou!
)
Hepull
edmypy jamatothedir
ecti
onofthe
mainhouse.Ipi
ckedhi
m upandpl acedhimin
myarms,Ihaveasoftspotforbabiesal
sovery
cr
azyaboutthem
Me:
Asambe(
let
'sgo)
. 
Hewast al
ki
ngallt
hingsIcoul
dn'tevenhear
whichar
enotevenclosetobeingtypedhere.
SoIwenttoatt
endNonzamebecauseshewas
theonecal
li
ngme.Iwentt oherroom andsat
onthechai
rwhichwasnexttot hedresser
. 
Nonzame:Morni
ng dear
,Ijustwanttotell
you
ever
ythi
ngaboutthecursefrom whereitbegan
Me:
Iwoul
dbedel
i
tat
edt
oheart
hat
Sheslowl
ysi
ghedandsatupst
rai
ghtbecause
shehadbeenfaci
ngt
heceil
i
ng.
 
Nonzame: Thi sallstartedwheny ourf
at herandI
gotmar ri
ed, Iwast oldt osecuremymar ri
age
bybeingsar cami sedsowecoul dhav
eat i
ght
rel
ati
ont oget herandi foneofuscheat sheor
shewillforev erbecur sed.Abouttwot othree
yearsinourmar ri
age, west ar
tedhavingf i
ghts
andlosingt rustineachot herthat'
swhenhe
star
tedhav ingmi stresses. 
Me:
Okaybuthowdoesi
tinv
olv
eme?
Nonzame: Wai t!Wewi llgett here,asIwas
sayinghest artedhav i
ngmi stresseswher ehe
woul dli
ebysay i
ng."Ihav eabusi ness
conferencet oattendto"buthewasact uall
y
goingoutt oseey ourbiological motherthatyou
andBandi leshare.Sohef i
rstcamewi th
Bandileclaimingt hati
t'sjusthi ssister
'sson
andhewi l
lhav eabet t
ereducat ionthissideand
Iknewsomet hingwaswr ongbutIdi dn'
tmind
that.Toyoui twasdi fferent,heact uall
yagreed
thatyouwer ehi sownchi l
dandi fIdon'taccept
thatI'
m out. 
Me:
Wow!Sohewasactual
l
ysay
ingy
oucan
l
eav
eify
oudon'
twantme?
Her:Excat
ly,
twomont hspassedandmyf amil
y
camet ovisi
tusintheFreeState.Mymot her
didn'
teventrytounderst
andt hatyouwer ehi
s
chil
dandt ol
dust hatt
hecurset hatwas
supposetohappent oMar vi
nwi l
lactual
lybe
tr
ansferedtoyouandMar vinmustdi eifthat
happens.Ididn'
twantanythi
ngt ohappent o
youoryourfat
herbecauseIhadacceptyou
Sizi
phi
weasmyowndaught erandIlov
edyou
withmyall
. 
Nonzamehadt
earyeyesandIwasthatki
ndof
per
sonwhodoesn'
tli
keseei
ngother
shurt
Me:
SoI
'
m car
ryi
ngdad'
ssi
nsasmyown?
Shenoddedandt
hatbr
okemyhear
tint
opi
eces
Me:
Whatwi
l
lhappent
omewi
tht
hiscur
se?
Nonzame: Thecursecomeswi thalotof
chall
engesl i
keifyouaremarr
iedyouwi l
l
constant
lyhav efi
ghts,
youmayev engot oan
extentwher eyouevenwanttoseperateand
somehowi tdestr
oysever
ythi
ngandev ery
one
youlove.
 
Nowthatwasbeyondworseitwashect
ic!I
won'
tbetohandl
eevery
thingli
ket
hisno!I
won'
tbeabl
eto! 
Me:
Ist
heanywayIcanf
ighti
torj
ustany
thi
ng
t
oremovei
t?
Nonzame:
I'
m sor
ryt
osaythi
ssadl
yitwi
l
lbe
ar
oundunti
lyoudi
ebutr
ememberyoucan
over
comeit
Me:
How?HowcanIov
ercomet
hisshi
t?!
 
Iwasreall
ypi
ssedandIdon'tt
hinkIhadmy
sel
f
qui
teclear
lyt
hatIhadsworntoanelder
Nonzame: I
fy out rusttheLor dany thingis
possibl
e.Ify ougot otheBibleandr eadf rom
Romans8v erse26t o27wher eitsay s"Inthe
samewayt heSpi ritalsocomest ohel pus,
weakaswear e.Forwedonotknowhowwe
oughttopr ay;theSpi ri
thimsel fpleadswi t
hGod
forusingroanst hatwor dscannotexpr ess.And
God, whoseesi ntoourhear ts,knowswhatt he
thoughtofSpi ri
tis; becauset heSpi r
itpleads
withGodi nbehal fofhi speopl eandi n
accordancewi t
hhi swi l
l"
.WhatImeani st hat
prayeri
stheonl yweapont hatcanhel py ou
overcomet hei mpossi bleandi fyouj ustkneel
andpoury ourhear teveryt
hingwi llbe
accompl
i
shedf
ory
ou.
Me:ButI
'm sti
l
lconfusedinwhatt odo!Idon'
t
knowwhatt odonext.Ifeeldefeat
edbutthere
i
ssomet hi
ngcourageousi nsi
deofme, sayi
ng"I
shoul
dn'
tgiveup,Ishouldcontinuemov i
ng
ahead"
Nonzame:Yesmychi
l
d,f
oll
owt
hatandany
thi
ng
wi
llbepossibl
e
Me:AsmuchasIhat et
osayt hi
sbutsomethi
ng
i
nwi t
hinyouisver
yspeci
al,
yesy oumayhave
hur
tmei ndif
fer
entwaysbutIknowy oudi
dn'
t
meant o
Nonzame: AndIstrongl
yagreet
hatImayhave
treat
edy oubadlybutrememberIchoseto
foll
owt hewrongwayandnowI 'm get
ti
ng
punishedforthat
Idi
dn'tknowwhattosaybecauseIwasseei
ng
adif
ferentsi
deofNonzamewhi chwasf
ull
y
cov
eredbyt hebad
Her:GoandeatbecauseIcansensey ouar e
hungry,pl
easealwaysknowt histhattomor r
ow
maycomewi thsomet hingel
seandknowt hatI
nevermeanttohurty ou.Yesy ouwi l
lthinkI'
m
crazyforsayi
ngthi
sbutIal way slovedy oubut
withmyf amil
ybehindmeev erythi
ngjust
crumbledint
osomet hingIlostcont r
ol ofandI
sayagain,Il
oveallofy ou.
 
Ijustdi
dn'
tknowwhattosayisNonzamegoi
ng
todiesoon?Whati
shappeningtoher?Whyt
he
suddenchangeofhear
t?
.
.
[
NONZAME]
Peoplemayhat eanddisl
ikeme, buttotelly
ou
thetruthIhatemy sel
fmor e.Ireall
yletmy sel
f
down, fol
lowi
ngt hewrongdeedsandf orget
ting
thatIwasput ti
ngmy sel
fatr i
skwasonet hi
ng
ontopofanot her.Ial
way slovedSi zi
phiwewi th
myal lbutIhadt oobeytherulessummonedby
mymom becauseIcamef rom ar
oy alf
ami l
y
whereIwasapr i
ncessandmymot herwasa
Queen.Ial
waysrememberwhenmymot her
usedtoshoutatmeandsay .
 
Mom: It
oldyouthi
swasnomanf oryou.Al
lhe
knowsisrunni
ngaroundsear
chi
ngfornew
pant
ies
Me:Butmom y
oudon'
tunder
standbecausey
ou
don'
twantt
o 
Mom:
Makemeunder
stand!
 
Me:Il
ovet
hatmaneventhoughhemayhur
tme
al
otbutIl
ovehi
m andhi
skids.
That'swhereev eryt
hingturnedintolemonsf or
me.Fol l
owingt heredulati
onsofmymot herI
wast heonewhogott angl
edint hespiderweb,
aftertheprocessofki l
li
ngMar v
int hecur sewas
swangt oSiziphiwe.Icouldn'
tdoany t
hingbut
j
ustr egretl
ist
eningtomymot her .Igot
disownedathomeandIhadt ost epdownas
thepr i
ncessjustforkill
i
ngaper sonbutIwas
toldtodoso, Ieventual
lyt
urnedint
oamonst er
andangerbui l
dupi nme.ImadeSi ziphi
wea
slave,l
etherbetouchedbyamanwhopai dto
sleepwithherjusttogivebackrevengetoher
forcausingproblemsi nmyfamilyandmarri
age
butIdidn'tt
hinkstraughtwhyIdidthat.
 
Alloft hattur
nedagai nstmeandImetwi ththe
count ry'
smostwant edcri
mi nal
, seri
al rapist
andmur dererbutnotknowi ngIwasget ting
punished.Hei nfectedmewi ththedi sease
whichi sHI ValsoanSTDandIf oundoutt oo
l
atet hatIhadbeenaf fect
ed.ThemoneyIhad
wasn' tenought obuymet heARV' SbecauseI
al
sohadt osetasidemoneyt obuygr ocer i
esto
sustainusbecausenoneofmyki dswer e
havingj obs.ButIalsoagreet hesl ow, painful
deathwast her i
ghtwayt odiebecauseIhad
causedal otofemot ionalabuset osomeone' s
chi
ld. 
Thatver
ysecondwhenSizi
phi
weleftt
heroom,
If
eltr
eli
evedl
ikesomet
hinghadbeenhol
ding
meback.Ifel
tmybodyshut ti
ngdownonme,
myey essl
owlycl
osingonmeandIknewi twas
theendofmyjourney.Thiswastherel
ast
breathofmyl
ifebeforeIcoul
dleaveever
ythi
ng
behind.
 
Goodbyeworl
d,goodby
eli
feandgoodby
e
ever
ythi
ng.
 
.
TheEnd