Life Begins When You Learn To Love

Yourself Again
By Julia Donnelly Updated August 13, 2019

We always hear “You can’t love someone until you fully love yourself.” But, what if the
problem is that we don’t want to love someone, but something? It doesn’t have to be about a
great love story (although, that would be nice). What if you’re searching for a love of life and
that happiness, joy, and excitement that you know can be there?

Life is never easy. There is always stress at work and in relationships. Struggles with family and
friends. Bills to be paid and chores to be done. It’s not about reaching perfection, but more about
finding acceptance in where you are. We put up walls and allow ourselves to be weighed down
by grief, insecurities, anxiety, stress, and hurt. The more you’ve been betrayed in the past, the
higher and thicker the walls have become. You let them beat you down and get the best of you.
You feel that everyone always sees you as sad, stressed, and just not yourself.

You’re not alone.

Make a promise to yourself that enough is enough. Make a plan. Make a list. Talk to a friend or a
therapist. Explore your walls and dig down deep to discover what they are made of and what
their foundation is.

Forgive your past. It won’t be easy. You’ve been hurt mentally, physically and emotionally. It’s
taken you a long time to get where you are today. But without that hurt, you wouldn’t be as
strong as you are now. You wouldn’t know what you want, and more importantly, what you
deserve.

Forgive your present. Forgive the grief you feel. Forgive work for causing you stress. That friend
for not calling you back. Forgive the guy who broke your heart. Forgive the universe for being
unfair. Forgive your body for whatever ailments you battle each day. Forgive your mind for
being anxious.

Find your passion. You go to work. You come home. You cook. You clean. You go to bed. You
need to take care of you before you can take care of others. What is something that brings you
joy? What is something you’ve always wanted to try? Pick up the paintbrush. Join that gym.
Read that book. Write that book. Learn that instrument.

Forgive yourself. You’ve been through hell and back. And you’re still here. You didn’t give up.
You learned to persevere even in the roughest of times. There will still be rough times. Times
where you don’t know what you’re going to do, or how you’re going to get there. But you will
make it. You made it this far. You don’t have a choice but to keep going.
Once you forgive you will slowly start to feel that joy again. You smile more. You have more
pride in yourself. You get excited for new projects in that passion you discovered. You want to
make plans with friends. You want to get out into the world. You feel like a weight has been
lifted, each day a little more than the last. You won’t be the person you were before the hurt. You
will be better, stronger, and happier.