PSY 244 Thought Paper 2

Erica Kimberly R. King

“Do you think divorce should be legalized in the Philippines?”

Divorce is a difficult topic to discuss, more so among Filipinos, since the culture
emphasizes the importance of the family being the basic unit of society. Unfortunately, some
marriages do fall apart for one reason or another, and husband and wife come to a
crossroad where they either attempt to stay together “for the children” or part ways.
Arguments can be made for either decision. Couples may try to hide their problems
and keep it away from their children; however, development occurs in nested systems
wherein one microsystem, in this case, the marital relationship, inevitably has an effect on
parent-child relationships. Staying in a marriage with high conflict may produce a familial
environment high in aggression and violence. Maxwell and Maxwell (2003) found that
Filipino adolescents who witnessed familial aggression and violence self-reported higher
aggression, regardless of gender. Additionally, according to Harold, Shelton, Goeke-Morey,
and Cummings (2004), marital conflict reduces the child’s emotional security about
parenting, which in turn increases internalizing (anxiety, depression) and externalizing
problems (verbal and physical aggression), as well as negatively affecting social
competence, adjustment, and academic achievement.
From here, it may seem that removing the stressor of marital conflict is the obvious
solution in optimizing adolescents’ development. Yu et al. (2010) calls this the Stress Relief
Hypothesis wherein the association between parent’s marital conflict, and conflict and
control in mother-child relationship is moderated by divorce, that is, divorce can actually
relieve the negative effects of marital conflict on adolescents and parents themselves. In
cases of physical domestic violence, divorce allows mothers to become more physically and
mentally healthy, thus being more able to parent effectively.
Arguments can also be made regarding the negative effects of divorce on
adolescence. Fathers are 90% of the time the nonresidential parent, that is, the parent who
does not live with the rest of the family. This makes it particularly difficult for them to maintain
close ties with their children. Furthermore, fathers link their role as a father with their role as
a husband, so they tend to withdraw from their children after divorce. They are also less
likely to develop closer relationships with their sons than mothers will with their daughters.
Yu et al. (2010) hypothesize that this is because mothers compensate for the divorce by
developing a closer relationship with their children, especially with daughters. Corak (2001)
studied the long term consequences of divorce on adolescents and found that these
adolescents put off marriage for longer, and once married, had a greater likelihood of marital
instability, which may end in separation or divorce.
 The Philippines is one of only two countries in the world (the other being Vatican)
where divorce is not legal. Nevertheless, Filipinos have found ways to work around this—
from separation, annulment, to cohabitation. In fact, there is a declining proportion of males
and females who are legally married. Those who do get married do so at an older age than
before. This, along with higher educational attainment provide women with jobs and
economic resources to pay for legal fees of separation, as well as to provide for herself and
her family. There is also an increase in the Nonmarital Cohabitation Phenomenon wherein
one partner is already married to another person outside of the relationship. Additionally,
Filipinos living in urban areas are more likely to dissolve unions compared to those living in
rural areas with traditional values (Abalos, 2017).
Attitudes toward divorce are also increasingly becoming more tolerant. In a survey
conducted by Radio Veritas among 1200 Filipino respondents from urban and rural areas,
39% strongly agree with making divorce legal in the Philippines, compared to 35% who
strongly disagree (Yap & Santos, 2018). Those who agreed tend to be the younger and
richer demographic in the sample. More women than men agreed with making divorce legal.
Looking at the Divorce Bill, Cupin (2018) cites that divorce will be cheaper and
faster compared to annulments, which cost upwards of PHP 250,000 and takes up to
decades to resolve. The Divorce Bill is also both pro-woman and pro-poor. Many divorce
cases involve an abusive relationship where the woman is a victim. The Divorce Bill has
clauses for providing alimony to the innocent spouse, as well as waived litigation fees for
divorce applicants whose real properties are below PHP 5M. The bill also takes precautions
in every part of the process of divorce. First, the bill was drafted in consultation with OFWs,
women’s groups, and other stakeholders. Second, there is a 6 month cooling-off period
(waived for domestic abuse cases) and a ‘change of heart’ clause, should the couple agree
to stay together even after the application has been filed. If not, then a lawyer, social worker,
psychologist and psychiatrist will be assigned to each case, and a joint plan for parenthood
will be arranged.
Given all these, I believe that divorce should be legalized in the Philippines. There
are negative effects on adolescents when parents with marital conflict stay together and
when they separate. The current options available to couples are expensive and laborious,
draining already depleted financial and emotional resources of families with marital conflict.
Relationships are strained even further for a longer period of time. Nonmarital cohabitation
occurs, with the stigma associated with it, and without the legal benefits of being legally
married. With the divorce bill, however, Filipinos will have a better option. The Divorce Bill
takes appropriate precautions and keeps the most vulnerable stakeholders—children,
domestic abuse victims, and indigent applicants—in mind. It provides professional and
much-needed support to families in the process of divorce, and would allow parents to be
able to cleanly move on with their lives and be in a better position to parent their
adolescents.
When the Divorce Bill is finally implemented in the Philippines, more care and
attention should be given to children and adolescents of divorcing couples. Adolescence is a
time of drastic change in an adolescent’s physical, cognitive, and socioemotional
landscapes. Add to that parental conflict, familial violence and divorce, and it becomes an
incredibly insecure time for the adolescent. Parents should attempt to separate their marital
conflict from their parent-child relationship, but also acknowledge the fact that since
development occurs in nested systems, they can never be truly separated. At least, by
knowing that they are inevitably affected by marital conflict, they can take more precautions
in regulating their emotions when interacting with their adolescent after an intense fight with
their spouse. Often in fights, parents use children to hurt their partner, threatening that they
will never see their child again. This is stressful and hurtful for both the nonresidential parent
and the child, emphasizing the need for calm, join decision-making in parenting
arrangements where everyone’s wishes and capabilities are taken into consideration.
Parents should be honest to their adolescents, encourage them to ask questions, while also
taking into account their developmental stage (i.e. cognitive and emotional capacity). Lastly,
both parents should do their best in providing unconditional love and support to the
adolescent, and maintain close ties despite living in separate households.
Parents, schools, and communities should work together in reducing stigma around
divorce. It is important to maintain routines so that adolescents can count on structured
aspects of their lives for safety and security amidst a changing internal and external
environment; however, at the same time, adults in the adolescents’ lives should be more
understanding and helpful while the adolescent is adjusting. Finally, Teachers, guidance
counselors, and peers can lend an ear to an adolescent who may want to have someone
external from the family to talk to.
 References
Abalos, J. B. (2017, May 9). Divorce and separation in the Philippines: Trends and
correlates. Demographic Research, 37, 1515-1548, doi:
10.4054/DemRes.2017.36.50
Corak, M. (2001). Death and divorce: The long‐term consequences of parental loss on
adolescents. Journal of Labor Economics, 19(3), 682-715, doi:10.1086/322078
Cupin, B. (2018, February 22). Explainer: What are the grounds, provisions in House divorce
bill? Rappler. Retrieved from https://www.rappler.com/nation/196612-explainer-
house-divorce-bill
Harold, G., Shelton, K., Goeke-Morey, M., & Cummings, E.M. (2004). Marital conflict, child
emotional security about family relationships and child adjustment. Social
Development, 13(3), 350-376.
Maxwell, C. D., & Maxwell, S. R. (2003, December 1). Experiencing and witnessing familial
aggression and their relationship to physically aggressive behaviors among Filipino
adolescents. Journal of Interpersonal Violence, 18(12), 1432-1451,
https://doi.org/10.1177/0886260503258034
Yap, D., & Santos, T. G. (2018, March 22). Church survey: More Filipinos ‘strongly agree’
with divorce law, Inquirer.net. Retrieved from
http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/977251/church-survey-more-filipinos-strongly-agree-
with-divorce-law
Yu, T., Pettit, G. S., Lansford, J. E., Dodge, K. A., & Bates, J. E. (2010). The Interactive
Effects of Marital Conflict and Divorce on Parent-Adult Children’s
Relationships. Journal of Marriage and the Family, 72(2), 282–292.
http://doi.org/10.1111/j.1741-3737.2010.00699.x