Professional Documents
Culture Documents
How to spot a liar, then? Well, experts claim that if you know the
signs to look for, you can always spot a liar in the act:
1. Start by building trust
When people are lying, they tend to speak more than people who are
being truthful, as if, in trying to cover up the lie, they over-explain, perhaps
in an attempt to obscure the truth in words. Also, you should pay
attention to their getting louder and/or faster, as both of these show
stress. If you hear a crack in the natural tone of voice at some point, this
is the point where the lie is told. Other signs to look out for
are coughing or clearing the throat repeatedly.
When you want to spot a liar in action, ask questions which you know the
person will answer truthfully to and use them as a control with which you
can compare their later responses to key questions. If the person’s
default is calm, for example, and then becomes anxious or angry, you
might have reason for suspicion. It works the other way around too,
though, if someone is unusually calm for the key questions, it might show
that they are feigning it to cover up their real feelings.
When you’re trying to spot a liar, note that they might be prepared in
advance to answer questions deceitfully. But if you catch them off
guard by asking an unexpected question, the facade can quickly crumble.
It’s almost impossible to fake a genuine smile. People will time fake smiles
inappropriately, they’ll smile for longer than they would with an authentic
smile and they’ll smile with their mouths but not with their eyes.
You might be able to detect the real emotion combined with the smile if
you look closely enough.
When people are being honest, they tend to add to the story further
details and facts as they remember how things happened. When people
are lying, they’ll probably just repeat statements they’ve already made so
that they don’t trip up and make a mistake.
I don’t know what the worst thing about being lied to is. Is it the
humiliation of having been taken for a ride? Is it the crushing fall back to
earth after someone warped your idea of reality? Is it that you’re robbed
forever of the ability to trust another person?
There’s no such thing as ‘what a person doesn’t know doesn’t hurt them’.
Make no mistake, lying is a grave sin. When you undermine somebody’s
sense of reality, you are undermining the whole basis on which they make
life decisions and you’re potentially ruining that person’s ability to relate to
people in a trusting and open way.