OLET1115

(Im)Politeness in Global Society

Forms of address

A good example of how the norms of politeness vary in different languages is the
different use of forms of address. For instance, in European languages like French,
Italian, and Spanish, there are two ways of addressing your interlocutor (the person you
are talking to). One is more formal such as vous in French, Sie in German, or lei in Italian,
the other is more familiar such as tu in French, du in German, and tu in Italian. If this
seems complicated, well in the case of the Arabic language, it is even more complex. For
example, in Standard Arabic and most regional dialects such as Egyptian or Jordanian
Arabic, there are a masculine and feminine familiar “you,” inta and inti, as well as a
masculine and feminine polite “you,” HaDritak and HaDritik.
All these languages conjugate their verbs. The verb takes a different form
according to the subject. For example, in Italian, “I go” is “vado,” but “you go” is “vai,”
and in the plural, “you guys go,” it becomes “andate.” This means that in these
languages one typically does not need to state the subject, as it is already expressed by
the verb. In English, we normally say “I go.” But in Italian, we don’t need to say “io
vado”: the “io” (I) is already contained in “vado.”
This has an interesting implication in the Arabic language. Arabic also conjugates
verbs according to the subject, and one doesn't need to say the subject. As a result, if
someone does use the word 'you' (inta or inti), the effect is very strong. Typically, the
word “you” is used in arguments, and gives an accusatory tone to the sentence: “YOU
went there, didn’t you!” For this reason, in normal, polite conversation, most people
would try to avoid saying “you” altogether.
When speaking English, speakers from languages like Italian, French, and Arabic
note that they feel the need for an equivalent expression for the polite “you” in English.
Because there is no way of saying ‘you’ more politely, they often tend to use indirect
expressions like “shall we go to the restaurant?” rather than “would YOU like to go to
the restaurant?”

The Japanese language, by contrast, does not conjugate verbs like French or
Arabic, but neither does it express the subject like English. For example, to say “would
you like to go to the restaurant” or “shall we go to the restaurant” you would use an
expression like “restaurant ni ikimasenka?” which means “how about going to the
restaurant?” without any subject.
On the other hand, Japanese has a very developed and complex set of honorifics.
These are special verbs and other grammatical expressions that express respect for your
interlocutor. This is done by using an ‘honorific’ verb form for actions done by the other
person, and a ‘humble’ verb for the actions done by ourselves. Korean language also has
a sophisticated set of honorific verbs and expressions.
In Japanese, if I want to be polite to the person I am talking to, instead of saying
something like “ikimasenka?” I will say “irasshaimasenka?” “Irassharu” is the honorific
form of the verbs “to go” and “to come” in Japanese. Have you ever noticed that when
you enter a Japanese restaurant in Sydney, the waiters shout “Irasshaimase”? This is an
idiomatic expression for “welcome” that is related to this polite verb. When they say
“irasshaimase,” the waiters are thanking you for coming, and expressing respect for you,
valuable customer. Even at a cheap sushi train restaurant! Isn’t that nice?
Similar to speakers of Italian, French, or Arabic, Japanese and Korean people
when speaking English may feel the need for more polite expressions to address the
person they are talking to. As a result, they may use more indirect expressions, or longer
expressions, that may sound clumsy or unnecessary to us. If we don’t know where this is
coming from, this can create miscommunication. We may think that they are mocking us,
or that they are not really saying what they think. Conversely, English expressions may
sound too direct to Japanese, Korean, Arabic, or French speakers.

Another important element that varies across cultures is what name we use to
address the person we are talking to. In Australia, it is very common to address
everyone by their first name, even when they are older than you, or your teacher, or a
superior at work. In European languages like French and Italian, this is not acceptable.
People will call only close friends and family members by their first name. When talking
to a distant acquaintance, a teacher, or a superior at work, they will call them by their
last name, usually preceded by a title, such as “Mr/Ms” (monsieur/madame in French,
signor/signora in Italian) or “Professor” (professeur in French, professore in Italian). In
East Asian languages like Chinese or Japanese, too, the first name is reserved only to
close friends.
Also, in English, people address their parents as “mum” and “dad,” but call
siblings by their name. In Chinese and Japanese, family members are usually not
addressed by their name. In Japanese, you would not call your sister by her name, but
oneesan “older sister.”

Finally, a related area is that of compliments. In Indonesia, it is acceptable, and in
fact common, to greet a person by saying “tambah gemuk,” which literally means “you
got fat”. In China, it is acceptable, and common, to compliment a person on their getting
older, usually when they are over sixty. When speaking English, native speakers of these
languages may find it normal to use similar compliments. This may be quite off-putting
for someone from a culture where “fat” and “old” are the opposite of a compliment…
There are many different ways of addressing the person you are talking to in
different cultures. When speaking English, people might try to find ways of expressing
themselves politely by speaking in ways that are closer to their native language, and
sound strange in English. If we don’t know where this is coming from, this can create
miscommunication. If we are aware that there are many ways of addressing others, it is
easier to realise that what is common sense to us may be strange to others, and what is
strange to us, may be common sense to them. This is an important part of
understanding (im)politeness in global society.