COLEGIO DE DAGUPAN

SCHOOL OF TEACHER EDUCATION

CAMPUS JOURNALISM
Chapter 6. In Focus: Writing the Whole News Story

More Concepts in News Writing

If the lead tells the story in capsule, the body of the news explains the facts in detail.

Should one base the meaning of news writing on this argument, a writer may surmise two

concepts. First, the body of the news retells the story found in the lead. Second, the facts are to

be arranged logically in the body of the news. With these i conclusions, the writer should not only

be good at sensing newsworthy items and gathering news but also be adept in weaving the facts

into the most comprehensible and logical way.

As you go on to write the body of the news item, you should not delete the image of the

inverted triangle, which tells that the most important facts should come first. However, this is

mostly true to a fact story or a straight news. For an action story, the version is different. The

action story follows a chronological arrangement of data other than according to the importance

of facts. Sample stories under action story include stories that lead to themselves such as

accident, fire, some sports events and the like.

Qualities of News

The aim of a news writers is to provide stories to startle and to engage the readers within

the first few sentences and, in the middle, to widen, deepen or sharpen their knowledge. As a

writer you should ensure that the news articles are of quality. When can you say that your articles

are of good quality?

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Accuracy

Attribution

Fairness

Brevity

Clarity

1. Fairness and balance

As a reporter, you must learn to get other's point of view. This may mean calling a person

late at night to get his side of the story or even holding back an investigative story for a day. But

you must do so. This is the best way to bring balance in the copy.

There may be times when an individual may avoid making a statement. In such a case,

state the point, indicating the efforts you made to get his point of view.

Fairness requires that you do not impute motives. Remember that your news report is

going to be read by hundreds of people, and you can influence their thinking by using loaded

words. It is always best to use neutral words.

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2. Accuracy

As a reporter, you have much power. What you write can influence decisions, help form

public opinions of people and contribute to the general attitude of your readers.

With that opportunity in dipping your finger to public forum come the huge

responsibilities that cannot be taken so lightly. Say, you inadvertently committed an error of

detail like, misspelt the name of the guest speaker, misquoted the witness of the school crime or

omitted an essential piece of information. You not only distort the truth, which is the foreground

and anchor of the news. You not only misinform the public. You also damage the credibility of

your campus paper. Hence, being accurate in your writing, whatever article that may be, is your

primordial yardstick in telling if your article is of good quality.

A writer once opined, "I pardon the slight error on comma and period, but I abhor the

error on detail and fact." Further, by being accurate means editing the article before you send it.

The facts that you need to check are:

✓ names and their spellings

✓ their school designations

✓ incident details. In case it is an accident, you must know the exact number of people

who were injured or killed.

✓ statements: The quote reported in the news report must be accurate and in context.

It should not be misinterpreted to imply another meaning.

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✓ scientific names if it is a science story, you must make sure that all scientific names

are correctly spelt and explained. number of runs or goals if it is a sports story, then

you must make sure that the number of runs made or goals scored is mentioned

accurately.

3. Attribution

All news reports, with a few exceptions, must be sourced. This ensures that you are

injecting both facts and opinions, but the opinions are not yours. Always ask yourself, "Who said

this?" The source can be identified as follows:

a. Individual. An individual, who witnessed an accident or survived an earthquake, can be

quoted by name as an eyewitness.

b. Organization. Do not forget to attribute the statement to a spokesperson authorized

by an organization to brief the media on its behalf. An organization in the school may be the

Parent Teachers Association, the Faculty Club, Performing Arts Society, Supreme Student

Government and others. The spokesman can be referred to by:

➢ name and designation

Sample:

Mr. Jing Gel Bells, president of the Parent Teachers Association, said that the

auditorium is...

➢ designation alone

Sample:
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The president of the Parent Teachers Association said that the auditorium

➢ anonymous sources. There are occasions when a news source, who happens to

be a senior government official or an important leader, does not want his or her

name to be used. In such case, the reporter can attribute the story to informed

sources, well-connected sources, official sources i or sources who do not wish to

be named. However, the reporter must know the source well and should trust that

the information provided is correct.

Sample:

According to a trusted source coming the school, the auditoritum…

➢ exceptions: The reporter need not to worry about attribution in those cases that

he/she has witnessed. For instance, the reporter can report a volleyball match or

a rally stating what happened. This is because these are statements of fact that

have occurred in public domain and have been witnessed by scores of people. The

same applies to the swearing in of a new principal or president of the college or

historical facts.

4. Brevity and Clarity

Newspaper writing is not just academic writing. Hence, as a journalist, do not use big

words and long sentences to show the readers how smart you are or how extensive your

vocabulary is. Your Communication Arts teacher must have shouted this, "Write to express not

to impress." Also, remember that, as a writer, your target i readers or audience are pressed of

time. You have to give the news very quickly, concisely and briefly. Think of this: if all your news
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stories are newsworthy and with high degree of interest, then every story in the campus paper

competes for the reader's attention. With every story you write, ask yourself, "What is the news

here?" Then, ask yourself, including the persons around you - say, your co-writers - What

questions will the reader have that I need to answer? Jot them down and be sure none is left

unanswered.

When the reader starts to scratch his scalp, there are only two reasons why the reader

does so. First, his scalp is truly itchy. Second, you, as the writer, have failed to attain clarity. If his

reason is the second one, then the reader must be lying on a bed of thorns to grasp the details

of your news story. The culprit must be your lengthy sentences and paragraphs. In short, write

short. Write short sentences, short paragraphs and short articles. Use simple words. One tip to

ensure clarity is to read your story aloud. Doing this technique may be awkward, but it will help

you find sentences difficult to understand.

The importance of this characteristic cannot be over stressed. You must learn to write

short stories without missing important facts. Please remember that today's reader is in a hurry.

He does not have lengthy patience to go through long news reports. Brevity does not only mean

writing a short story. It also means using short words, short sentences and short paragraphs.

5. Style

Good writers are artists, so are news writers. As a promising news writer, you can

entertain, inspire, educate and sometimes earn the ire of your readers. A song goes, "Never to

walk in anyone's shadow." So, act according your own style. i Do not copy others' style but always
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SCHOOL OF TEACHER EDUCATION

remember to follow the guidelines in writing news articles. Look for some opportunities like the

construction of your paragraphs i and phrases, to veer from the old and traditional scenes in the

newspaper. Never forget, though, that your primordial objective is to tell people what they need

to know, not to show them how much of a literary artist you are.

First Five Formula for an Inverted Triangle News Story

1. Effective lead, focused, short, memorable

2. A second paragraph that amplifies the lead

3. A third paragraph that continues to build detail

4. Additional details in decreasing importance

5. Power quote: an interesting quote that propels meaning, not just a fluffy quote that gets

in the way

The Do's of News Writing Style

1. Omit needless words.

2. Be sparing with adjectives but lavish with verbs.

3. Beware of your special words.

4. Simplify words.

5. Remember your signposts.

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The Don’ts of News Writing Style

1. Colloquialism. This can be described as writing in the way that one would speak. In doing so,

you should avoid using "filler" words like beginning the sentence with "basically," "often," "well,"

and "so".

Avoiding contractions is also included in the ambit of colloquialism. As a journalist, you

replace "can't with cannot take note: cannot is one word "doesn't" with does not, "aren't" with

are not, "could 've" with could have, and so

In news writing, too, you should limit your use of subjective pronouns. That is, use third

person perspective. Do not use first or second person pronouns like "L" "me," "you' and "we'

Included in the list of rules in writing is to avoid vague words. They are described as

expressions or words that are open to interpretation or that do not express precise ideas.

2. Circumlocution. This means that the writer uses many words where few would do.

Circumlocution is basically a figure of speech where the meaning of a word or a phrase is

indirectly expressed through several or many words. It is in contrast to brevity and conciseness.

3. Ambiguity. This case may be syntactical or semantical. Ambiguity can be either intentional or

unintentional. Intentional ambiguity may be used to mislead a reader or might be necessary due

to the context or subject matter. Unintentional ambiguity, on the other hand, should always be

avoided and can be with care and practice.

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Here are samples of ambiguous sentences from a news report.

1. Dr. Malou Wang, the school principal, tells her secretary, Mrs. Ana B. Yan, that the fault

was hers. (Whose fault?)

Improved: Talking to her secretary, Dr. Malou Ho admitted her fault.

2. According to some sources, when Mr. Carreon put the jar atop the glass table, it was

broken. (What was broken?)

Improved: According to some sources, the glass table had broken when Mr. Carreon

placed the jar on it.

3. Ambiguous: The Dean of the Agriculture Department required eggs to be stamped with

the date when they are laid by the animal science majors. (Who laid eggs?)

Improved: The Dean of the Agriculture Department required the animal science majors

to stamp the eggs with the date when they are laid.

4. Cliches. These are phrases that have been exhausted to the point where they have

completely lost originality.

Avoid these cliches:

No shadow of doubt

Needless to say

Strange as it may seem

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Stands to reason

Last but not least

ln any shape or form

Leave no stone unturned

5. Grandiloquence. These are expressions that are too pompous and use too colorful

language.

Grandiloquent paragraph:

A conflagration which spurred before the sun stroke its rays heightened the anxiousness

of the neighboring families of Maasim Elementary School on the 25h day of our Lord last year.

Clearer paragraph:

Started at dawn of April 25 last year, the fire in the Home Economics Building of Maasim

Elementary School created commotion among the neighboring families.

Transitional Devices

One way to attain the smooth flow of facts when putting them on the right perspective is

the use of transitional devices. They are like bridges between parts of your news. They are cues

that help the reader interpret ideas your news develops.

Moreover, transitional devices are words or phrases that help carry a thought from one

sentence to another, from one idea to another or from one paragraph to another. Finally,
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transitional devices link smoothly sentences and paragraphs so that there are no abrupt jumps

or breaks between ideas.

You should be aware, too, that you only use these when needed. Do not overuse them by

starting each paragraph with a transitional device.

There are several types of transitional devices, and each category leads readers to make

certain connections or assumptions. Some lead readers forward and imply the building of an idea

or thought, while others make readers compare ideas or draw conclusions from the preceding

thoughts.

Here is a list of some common transitional devices that can be used to cue readers

1. To add: and, again, and then, besides, equally important, finally, further, furthermore,

nor, too, next, lastly, what's more, moreover, in addition, first (second, etc.)

2. To compare: whereas, but, yet, on the other hand, however, nevertheless, on the

contrary, by comparison, where, compared to, up against, balanced against, vis a vis, but,

although, conversely, meanwhile, after all, in contrast, although this may

3. To prove: because, for, since, for the same reason, obviously, evidently, furthermore,

moreover, besides, indeed, in fact, in addition, in any case, that is

4. To show exception: yet, still, however, nevertheless, in spite of, despite, of course,

once in a while, sometimes

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5. To show time: immediately, thereafter, soon, after a few hours, finally, then, later,

previously, formerly, first (second, etc.), next, and then

6. To repeat: in brief. as said, as noted.

7. To emphasize: definitely, extremely, obviously, in fact, indeed, in any case, absolutely,

positively, naturally, surprisingly, always, forever, perennially, eternally, never, emphatically,

unquestionably, without a doubt, certainly, undeniably, without reservation

8. To show sequence: first, second, third, and so forth. A, B, C, and so forth. next, i then,

following this, at this time, now, at this point, after, afterward, subsequently, finally,

consequently, previously, before this, simultaneously, concurrently, thus, i therefore, hence,

next, and then, soon

9. To give an example: for example, for instance, in this case, in another case, on this

occasion, in this situation, take the case of, to demonstrate, to illustrate, as an illustration, to

illustrate

10. To summarize or conclude: in brief, on the whole, summing up, to conclude, in

conclusion, as shown, as said, hence, therefore, accordingly, thus, as a result, consequently