The Importance of Assertiveness 51

Hint: Be polite. Be specific. Describe the effects of those erratic

price changes on your business—and your ability to remain a cus-
tomer. Then ask for something specific. Ask for commitment.

噛2: Say No Assertively

One test of assertiveness is the ability to say no. Do you often find
yourself saying yes to requests when you really want to say no? Are
people always asking you for many small concessions because
you’re a pushover? If so, you need to be assertive—to stand up for
your interests and say no. Using the principles of assertive confron-
tation, how would you say no in the following cases?

The demanding customer. You must refuse the other

side’s demand for an extended warranty on the framing imple-
ments you’re trying to sell because such a practice is not followed
in your industry.

Hint: First, explain that your boss would never agree to such a
demand. Second, offer an alternative (people are more likely to
agree with you if you offer them an alternative). Perhaps you could
extend such an unprecedented warranty if the other side locks in
to a longer-term contract. Third, ask for commitment and under-
standing. The wrong way to respond is to say, ‘‘I said no. What part
of no don’t you understand?’’ Put yourself on the receiving end of
that message. How would it make you feel? Keep in mind that you
want to say no but at the same time preserve the relationship.

The boss asks for too much. Your boss has just asked you
to stay late again to work on a proposal that is due. You don’t mind
pitching in when there are emergencies, but her requests for work-
ing after hours have become routine. If you don’t push back, you’re
afraid you’ll soon have a 10-hour-per-day job.

Hint: State, ‘‘I understand that the proposal is important. As

you know, I’ve stayed late three nights in a row to work on this.

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