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Emma Wagner

Professor Mitchell

SED342

March 22nd, 2023

Dancing with Our Partners Reflections and Recollections

Chapter 1:

Reflection 1. There are many things that can be done to ease the awkwardness, ambivalence, or

initial uncertainty during the first initial meeting. The teacher can reach out to the parents before

the meeting to say “hello” and introduce themself. The teacher can take the beginning of the

meeting and introduce everyone at the table. The table should be round so all members are equal.

The teacher can contact the parents often to build a strong rapport.

Recollection 1. One thing I took away from the reading about the parent-professional partnership

and the dance metaphor is it takes time to learn to dance with a partner. The meaning of this

metaphor is it takes time to build a strong relationship with families. It can be hard to trust at

first, and it only grows stronger through time.

Reflection 2. Professionals should introduce everyone at the beginning of the meeting with their

job titles, use parent-friendly language, create connections with the parents, and find a common

goal to reduce awkwardness in the initial meeting. Parents can be upfront with their wants and

needs, and advocate for their students to limit awkwardness. The professionals can start with

students’ strengths before talking about the weaknesses.

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Reflection 3. When asked to think about a personal story when I felt strongly about a situation:

my mind went directly to when I did not make the National Honor Society. My friends were

accepted, and everyone at my small school knew I did not get in. I was mortified. I wanted to get

in so badly, and it never occurred to me that they would not accept me. I was a straight-A

student, a great athlete, and a good person. I was told I was too quiet, not a strong leader, and

would not be accepted. I wanted to be accepted because my older sister had been. I felt like a

failure in my family. I wanted everyone to understand that being quiet does not make you less of

a leader. I can still lead through my actions.

Reflection 4. I would assume the parents were feeling overwhelmed, blindsided, and angry. I

assume the professionals were feeling frustrated, determined, and unvalued. The parents’

interests and values were based on previous school experiences. They had a plan all along and

were shocked when the teachers wanted to go a different route. The family was feeling

undermined because of their cultural beliefs. The professional's education impacted their

thoughts and decisions. They had schooling and evidence on why their idea was more

acceptable. They were hurt when the family did not like their recommendation.

Reflection 5.

Ms. Watkins- “We understand how this could look like segregation, but we would like to place

Josie in the classroom where she will be most successful.”

Mr. Lopez- “So you think I do not want what is best for my child?”

Ms. Watkins- “No we believe you want what is best for your daughter and that is why you are

advocating for her right now.”

Mrs. Lopez- “Is there any way that Josie could be placed in the general education setting?”
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Ms. Watkins- “Yes, it is ultimately your decision, but we do not think Josie will be successful in

that setting.”

Mr. Lopez- “There you go again telling me I do not know what is best for my child.”

I believe the meeting would go on like this and nothing would be accomplished. One suggestion

I would make for Ms. Walkins is to listen to what the parents have to say. She should

acknowledge their feelings and try to find a solution that works for everyone. The parents should

take a second to calm down and not jump to conclusions. They need to know that the teachers

are professionals.

Recollection 2. One thing I will take away from the reading on “colliding and Campaigning” is

that it is important to try and see things through new perspectives. It is essential to listen to

understand as well.

Recollection 3. If I remember one thing from my reading about Cooperating and Compromising,

it is to communicate often to build rapport.

Recollection 4. If I remember one thing from my reading about Creative Partnering and

Collaborating, it is this stage represents a family that has a fluid connection. Everyone's needs

are met. There can still be arguing, but it does not mean that each group does not respect one

another.

Chapter 2:

Reflection 1. While reading the Story of Sam, I had a lot of different emotions arise. I just kept

switching my position. I was sorry that the parents had to go through this, and it offered my

insight. I could feel what the school psychologist was feeling as well as being the “bearer of bad
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news.” I want to remember this story when I begin to build relationships with families. It can be

such a scary experience for most families. I need to be able to support them.

Reflection 2. As I read the Story of Rachel, it invoked many feelings. Again, I could feel for

both sides of the story. It would be hard as the parent, and it will be challenging as the special

education teacher. The takeaway is to listen to the parents and acknowledge their feelings. Show

the family empathy. It is, however, best to listen and respond to family needs/wants.

Chapter 3:

Reflection 1. As I reviewed this list, the three that caught my attention were “ask, speak out, and

communicate.” It is important that all parts of the team are good at communicating with one

another. It is important that the parents speak out about their child because ultimately, they know

their child the best. I choose “ask” because it is essential to ask questions to understand. I also

liked “involve your child” and “remember who your child is.”

Reflection 2. The reframing of “in denial” impacts my thinking about what families might

experience because it can be such a change in their lives. It can be hard for families to be

optimistic when they are told their child is different. “Hope” is a remarkable thing for parents to

have in this process, but sometimes it just is not realistic.

Reflection 3. Two other strategies to promote partnership are allowing time for parents to ask

questions and start the meeting by listing student’s strengths or a heartwarming story.

Reflection 4. It is important that parents feel welcomed and at ease at the beginning of the

meeting. Provide any support to help reach the goal.

Reflection 5. One thing I want to remember about beginning a meeting is to provide

refreshments and light chit-chat with the parents. It can help ease their minds before all logistics
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are discussed. One thing I want to remember about ending a meeting is to reassure the parents

they can contact me whenever they have concerns, questions, or just need some positivity.

Chapter 4:

Reflection 1. I have experienced my parents being angry at me. I was at my house, and I did not

listen to what my father said resulting in wrongdoing. I felt stupid, upset, and embarrassed. I felt

like a disappointment to my parents. I hid in my room after being yelled at.

Reflection 2. A list of the mother’s feelings: scared, frustrated, helpless, to blame, and

disheveled.

Recollection1. One thing I will remember from my reading about understanding anger is it

comes out of love.

Reflection 3. I thought it was very personal how Diane communicated with D.J.’s mother. It was

less formal which made it less intimidating for the parent. The mother was probably reading the

letters the whole time and felt she was inadequate to respond. It was creative thinking on the

teacher's part.

Chapter 4:

Reflection1.

Dear Mom,

I wanted to take a second to tell you how much I appreciate you. I value all the time you give me

and my sisters. You value yourself while also taking care of everyone around you. I am who I am

today because of the selfless way you raised me.

With love,
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Emma Wagner