PSYCHOTHERAPY

LESSONNI
NE

"
Posi
ti
veAt
ti
tudesi
nRecov
ery
"

"Recover
y"shoul dalwaysbeseenasanon- goi
ngpr ocess,no
matterwhet herthe clienthas present
ed thr
ough anxiety,phobias,
al
coholanddr ug-r
elatedproblems,marit
aldi
ffi
cul
ti
es,orber eavement.
Thet herapi
stshould continual
lybeawar ethat,asst ated i
n earl
ier
sect
ions,thecli
entwhoi sgivi
ngupani mport
antpartofhisident
itymay
worr
yhi mselfi
ntoil
lness.

I
nLessonSev enoft hiscour sei twasst at
edt hati
twoul dbe
appropriat
etoi nvolvethecli
enti n"li
sti
ng"v ar
iousareasofsupportthat
mightbeadv antageoust ohisorherr ecovery.Inthissect
ionIwoul d
continueinthatv einandsuggestt othest udentthatany"ol
dacti
v i
ti
es"
thatwi l
lbesuppor t
iveinthetransit
ionalprocessshoul dbedocumented.
You,ast hetherapist,canhelpy ourcli
entbydi scussingandcreat
ingan
i
nv entoryofthoseposi ti
veelement sofhi slif
et hatwil
lprov
idesupport
ashemov esintothenewandunknown.

Posi t
ivepeople,suchasfami l
ymember sandf ri
ends,aremost
i
mpor tantinthisprocess.Whi
let
hef amily,
nat
urall
y,shoul
dbeapr i
mary
sourceof
support,thatisnotalwaysso,
part
icularl
ywheredysfuncti
onalbehavi
our
i
sconcer ned.Ther emaybeso much angerl eftoverf r
om ment al
,
physicalabusethatfamilymembersar erel
uct
anttogivesupport.

Forther ecoveri
ngcli
entwhoenj oy shi
swork,thatactivi
tysuppli
es
a positiv
er ei
nforcement,bothi nt i
me struct
ure and per for
mance
requir
ement s,duri
ngt hetransi
tionper i
od.Bycontrast,thecl i
entwho
doesnotneedt owor kisl
ikel
yt obei ndangerbecausehehasnot i
me
struct
ure,hasf ewornocommi tment s,andhasampl etimet odwel lon
pastbehav ioursand subsequentdi ff
icul
ti
es.The isol
ated indivi
dual,
oftenreti
redorwel l-
to-
do,mustonl ypleasehimself
,andf requentl
yself-
sustai
n
generatedmot ivat
ionisnotsuff
icientto

Ther esurr
ecti
onofol dint
erestsandactivi
ti
escanbesuppor tiv
e
asthecl
ientmov estowardsthenewandunknown.Gar deni
ng,camping,
fi
shi
ng,phy si
calexerci
se,homeorcarr epai
r,oranyact i
vi
tythathas
beenofvalueinthepastshouldbeincl
udedintheinventor
y.

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However,itshoul
dbeappreci
atedbyt hestudentt
hatsuchan
i
nvent
oryshouldonlybeseenassupplement
arytotheposit
ivebel
i
efs
andat
ti
tudesofthecli
enthi
msel
f.

I
fast udentwer etor esearchintot hehi storyofpsy chologyhe
woul df i
ndt hatitisf ul
lofl earnedindividualswhohav ewor kedwi t
h
peopl ewhoar esi ckinanef f
ortt odi
scov ert hecauseoft heiril
lness.I
n
themai n,suchl earnedindivi
dualshavebeenwel lint
ent
ioned,andt her
e
i
sl it
tledoubtoft hefactthattheyhav ebenef i
tedusal l
.Amongstsuch
l
ear nedf el
l
owswasonemanwhodi dnotov erl
yconcer nhimsel fwit
h
sicknessandi tscauses,butr atherdev ot edhi mselftot hest udyof
healthandt hepr omotionofheal t
h.ThiswasAbr aham Maslow, towhom
referencehasbeenmadei near l
i
ersections.

Thepr
imar
yconcer
nofHumani
sti
cPsy
chol
ogyi
soneof-

"
Asar
esul
tofwhaty
oudo,
isy
ourl
i
femor
eorl
ess

sat
isf
ying?
""Doy
oul
i
key
our
sel
f?"

"
Doy
ouexper
iencepl
easur
e,peace,
cont
ent
ment
?"

Thi
sconcernwithregar
dtowhati
sgoi
ngonwi
thi
n,begi
nswi
tha
r
ecogni
ti
onoffeel
ings.

I
nthetr
adit
ionofMaslow'
shumanisticpsychol
ogy,letusnowtake
alookatindi
vi
dualswhohav edev
elopedaposi ti
veatti
tudetolif
e,who
fi
rmlybeli
eveinthemsel
ves,andendeav ourtofindoutwhyi tisthat
suchindi
vi
dual
sleadli
vest
hataresov i
brantandfulf
il
li
ng.

Suchi
ndi
vi
dual
s-

*uset
hei
rhumanf
aci
l
iti
es,
powerandt
alent
stot
hei
rful
l
estext
ent
,

*ar
eful
l
yfunct
ioni
ngi
nthei
rint
ernal
andext
ernal
senses,

*arecomf
ortabl
ewith,andopent
o,thef
ull
exper
ience
andexpr
essionofall
humanemot i
ons.

A per
son who i
svibr
ant,ali
ve,and who can adopta posi
ti
ve
at
ti
tudet
oli
fe,
trav
elsi
nconf
idence.Heissecur
einhi
sbel i
eft
hat-

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 PSYCHOTHERAPY
"
Ifonei
sful
l
yal
iveandful
l
yfuncti
oni
ngi
nal
lpar
tsandpower
s,t
he
r
esul
tcanonl
ybehar
mony ,
notchaos.
"

Hei
sposi
ti
vei
nthoughtanddeedandabov
eal
l
,bel
i
evesi
nhi
msel
f.

"Youar
ewhaty oubel
ieveyouare,
"isastatementthathasbeen
chasedaroundforsolongthati
tshouldbewellandtrul
yi ngr
ainedi
n
every
one.Buti
tisnot
.Peopl
estil
ldonotaccepti
tasatrut
h.

Ifwedisti
lthecont emporarywisdom onthissubj
ectwewi l
lfind
thatitcanbef or
mulatedi nt
of i
veessenti
alstepswhichwilll
eadt he
cli
enttothelevelofself
-appreci
ati
on,
self-
beli
ef,andofposi
ti
vethought
whichisnecessarytotheirprogr
ammeofr ecovery.

Thesest eps, nor

mal l
yt akenint heor dersuggested, bui
l
dupont he
cli
ent
'spr evi
ousaccompl i
shment s.Ast het herapi
stwi llbeawaref r
om
thedescr i
pti
onoft hesteps,whi leeachonebui l
dsonandgr owsf r
om
thepreviousst ep,nonei sev erfull
yandf i
nallycomplet ed.Eachstepis
seenasbei ngessent i
all
yanewawar enessofper ception,andthemor e
deepl
yt heclientr eali
sest heseper ceptionst hemor ehewi l
lbel
ievein
perso
himselfandhispot ent
ialasaposi ti
ve

I
nbr
ief
,thef
ivest
epsar
e:

*Toaccepty
ou

*Tobeasy
ou

*Tof
orgety
ou

*Tobel
i
evei
nyou

*Tobel
ongt
oyou

Ex
pandi
ngont
heabov
e-

Thecl
ientmustaccepthi
msel
fasheis.Heshoul
dnotattemptt
o
l
iv
ef orthepromiseofsomet omor
row ort
hepot
enti
althat"
someday"
mightbe
r
ev ealedto

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Heshouldfeelabouthi
mselfasheis,i
nthesamewayandwi th
thesamewar m emoti
onsthathewoul
dfeeli
fhewer
etomeetsomeone
whom her eal
lylikedandadmi r
ed.Heshouldbeenthusi
ast
icabout
himself
.

Peopl
eareli
ber
atedbyt heirself
-acceptancetobeaut hent
icand
real
.Onlywhenthecl i
enthasf ull
yaccept edhimselfcanheacti na
posi
tivemannerand takeallther isksand r esponsi
bil
i
tiesofbeing
himself
.Oncehehasful
lyacceptedhimself,hecan-

*t
hinkhi
sownt
hought
sandmak
ehi
sownchoi
ces

*r
iseabov
etheneedf
ort
heappr
oval
ofot
her
s

*notf
eel
obl
i
gat
edt
oany
one

*accepthi
sownt
hought
sandf
eel
i
ngs,
whi
chwi
l
lbehi
sand
hi
salone

*feel
freetorepor
tinaposi
ti
vemanner
,hi
semot
ions,
ideas
andprefer
ences.

Oncet heclienthasmast eredthear tofaccept

inghimsel
fand
bei nghimself,i
tisnecessar
yforhimt omov eontoacquir
ingt
heskil
lof
"forgett
ing"himself.Tol
earntoreachoutinapositi
vemannertoother
s.
Pr acti
singthis stepdev el
opsagenui neandcaringconcernforhis
fellowsandmov esawayf r
om self
-cent
redness.

Ithasof t
enbeenst atedt hatthesizeofaper son'swor l
dcanbe
measur ed by the size oft hatper son'
s heart.The cl i
entcan be
comf ort
ableinthewor l
dofr eal
ityonlytotheextentthathehasl earned
toloveitandtocar efort
hosei nit.Forhi
mt odevelopaposi ti
veatti
tude
i
nhi sdealingswithothersi
ti snecessaryforhi
mt omot ivatehimselfto
escapef rom thedar kanddi minishedwor l
dofego- centri
cit
y,withi t
s
populati
onofone,anddev elopanempat hythatwillenablehimt of eel
deeplyandspont aneousl
yforother s.

Iti
sonlywhent hecli
enthasdev elopedaposi
ti
veatt
it
udet o
ent
eri
ngt s"
hi f
eeli
ngworl
d"ofotherst
hathisownwor
ldwil
lbeenl
arged
andhi
spotent
ial
forhumanexperi
enceenhanced.

Theinnermostbel
i
efofever
yonewhochoosest
oindulge
themselv
esinnegati
vet
houghtpat
ter
nsis"
Iam notgoodenough.
"
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Ift
hisbeli
efi
sf i
rmlyroot
edthentherei
sonlyonewayi nwhichi
t
canbeovercomeandt hati
sbytheuprooti
ngofthenegati
vethought
pat
ter
nsandt hetr
ansplant
ingofposi
ti
veonesinthei
rstead.

Thecli
entneedst omakeacommi tmenttobeli
evei
nhimsel f
,think
posit
ivethoughtsand acti n a posit
ive manner.Itisonlybysuch
commi t
mentt hathecanshapet hel i
feofthevibr
antandposit
iveperson
wehav espokenof .Failur
et obelieveinoneselfcanonlyresultint he
cl
ientspendi
ngt herestofhisli
fecompensat i
nghimselff
orthatfai
lure.

Thecl i
entneedst obel ong.Toenj oyasenseofcommuni ty
.A
communi tyisseen asa uni on ofper sonswho hav e somethi
ng in
common,who shar ei n mutuali
tyt heirmostpr eci
ous possessi
on.
Themsel v
es.The cl ientneedst o beabl etof eelthatheposi t
ively
bel
ongst oaf amily
,achur ch,tothehumanf amil
y .Heneedstobeabl e
to appreciat
et hatthere are also ot hers wi
th whom he can f eel
comfortableandathome.Wi thwhom hecanexper i
enceasenseof
mutualbelonging.

Asenseofisol
ati
onfort
hecli
entisdi
mini
shi
nganddest
ruct
ive-
I
tdri
vesthecli
enti
ntodept
hsoflonel
i
nessand

i
sol
ati
onI
tunder
minest
hecl
i
ent
'sconf
idence

I
tpromotesnegat
ivefeel
ingsofl
owsel
fwor
th,
angerand
r
esentmenti
ntheclient
.

Thepositi
vethi
nki
ngandactingper
sonwhohast
akent
hest
eps
t
hataresuggestedhasbutonequesti
oni
nmind-

"HowcanIful
l
yexper
ience,
enj
oy,
prof
itf
rom t
hisday
,thi
sper
son,
t
hischal
lenge?
"

Ther
efor
e,cl
i
ent
sshoul
d,asar
esul
toft
her
apy
,benotonl
yposi
ti
ve
but-

Conf
identt
hatt
heywi
llbeconst
ruct
iver
athert
handest
ruct
ive
i
ntheirwor
dsandact
ions.

Confi
dentt
hattheywil
lbecapabl
eofconst
antand
sat
isf
yingr
elat
ionshi
ps.

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Conf
identthatt
heywil
lberel
ati
vel
yfreef
rom t
hephy
sical
andpsychologi
cal
symptomsproducedbystr
ess.

Conf
identthatt
heywi
l
lper
for
m wel
li
nreasonabl
epr
opor
ti
on
tot
heirt
alents.

Confi
dentthattheywil
lprov
eadapt
abl
ewhenchangei
sthrust
uponthem orwhent heyhavet
omakeadeci
siont
hatwi
llchange
thecourseoftheirl
i
ves.

I
ttakesagreatdealofpr acti
ceforaclienttol ear
nt oconsulthis
i
nternal r
esour
cestodet er
minewhathewant stodoandactaccor dingl
y,
butbyappl yi
nghimselfposit
ivelytothetaskhewi lleventual
lysucceed.
Acti
ngi nanegativemannerheal l
owshi simpulses,fearsandhabi tst
o
mast erhim.Taking a posi ti
v e out
lookenableshi m to come t oa
consciousdecisi
ontor unhisownshow.I fhemai ntainstheconceptin
mindt hat-

"
Iam awor
thwhi
l
eper
sonandIam power
ful
"

t
henhewi
l
lonl
ygof
rom st
rengt
htost
rengt
h.

Theclientishuman,andassuchshoul dnotbesof ulloffal se

pri
deast othinkthathei sspeci
alanddiffer
entorsupposedtobebet ter
thananyoneel se.Everyonehasweaknessesandweal lhavestr
engt hs.
Weaknessesar enott obeseenasf laws,t
heyarejustanot
herpartofthe
wholeperson.Thecl ientmaynotwantt obeweakorscar edorjealous
orgreedyorsick,butifhedoesnotf ull
yacceptthepart
sofhimthatar e,
he willneverbe abl et o access thatpotent
ialwhich wi
llfacil
i
tat e
i
mpr ovementandchangei nhisli
fe.

I
tiswhil
sthehast hesuppor
toft hether
apeut
icrelat
ionshi
pthat
heneedto"wake-up"andtostar
ttoacceptandlovehimself.Hecannot
doitgradual
l
y ,i
tisacaseofhedoesorhedoesnot .Hecanei t
her
accepthi
mselforkeephi
mselfwait
ing,
wi shi
ng,
andwanting.

Fr
om themomentt hatt
heclientarrivesataposit
ivedecisionthat
nothing shalldefeathim anyl onger,t hen f
rom the i
nstantoft hat
decisionnot hi
ngcandef eathi
m.Asl ongashi sdecisi
oni sar ealand
honestonet hen,fr
om thatmomentonwar dshetakescont r
olov erhis
l
ifeandhi scircumstances.Hewi l
lthencont i
nuetogr ow inhi snew
str
engt hthroughthedeepeningofhi sfaithinhisownpot enti
al,forthe
str
engt hofbeliefi
sthekeytoself-
confidence.
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Byadopti
ngapositi
veatti
tudetohislife,thecl
ientplaceshimself
i
naposi t
ionofpowerwher enohazar d,obst acl
e,ordi ff
icul
tyneed
defeathim.Whenhecanacceptt hatasaf actandhol dthatconfidence
fi
rmlyi nhismi ndunti
litbecomesar eal
ity,thenhewi llhav egained
mast eryoverhi
sli
fe.

Incasesofext remenegat iv
ity,thecl
ientmayl at
chont otri
vi
al
probl
emsordi ffi
cult
iessurroundi
ngagoal ,diff
icul
ti
esthatcouldeasil
y
beov ercomei fatt
empt ed,anduset hesetr
ivi
ali
ti
esasanexcusef ornot
taki
ngact ion.Therewi llbeoccasi onswhenacl i
enthasbecomeso
negativ
et hathe orshe dev el
opswhati sknown ast he "
Yes,but"
syndrome.When anysuggest i
on,no mat t
erhow good,i s always
counteredwi t
hthewor ds-

"
Yes,
butIcan'
tbecause.
..
"

thest
udentshoul
dbeari
nmi
ndt
hef
actt
hatpar
toft
hebasi
cphi
l
osophy
ofthi
scoursei
sthat-

"
Can'
ti
swon'
t,
"

andmot iv
at etheclienttoadjusti
nghisout l
ookaccordingl
y.Af avour
it
e
techni
quef oraddressingthi
spr oblem i
sto"str
ikeoffthe'T'"
,havi
ngthe
cli
entwrit
eoutt hephrase"Ican't"andthen,byerasingorcr ossi
ngout
thelet
ter'
T',turnthephraseintothepositi
veaff
irmatonof"
i Ican".

Mostst
udentswi l
lhaveheardatsomet i
meofsuggesti
ontherapy,
theuseofposit
ive,
helpfulphr
ases.Thistechniquewasmadefamousby
EmileCouewhooper atedasuccessfulcl
inicinFrancei
nthe1920'
s.Iti
s
possibl
ethatanumberofst udentswi l
lalsobef ami
l
iarwi
thhiswel l
known,gener
alsuggestionfor
mula.

"
Daybyday
,inev
eryway
,I'
m get
ti
ngbet
terandbet
ter
."

Thetheoryist hatbyrepeati
ngtheformulaov erandoveronadail
y
basisthecl
ientwi l
lgetbetter.Suggest
ionther
apycanbeef f
ecti
vewhen
usedi nthecor rectmannerf orthecor r
ectpurpose.Howev er,i
fthe
suggesti
on isv iewed by t he rati
onalmi nd oft he cl
i
entas being
exaggerat
edorf alse,thesuggesti
onwi l
lberej
ected.

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Itisal
waysagoodideawhenattempti
ngtomotiv
ateaclientt
o
posi
ti
vechangetohavehi
m standbackandtakeanobject
ivel
ookat
hi
mself.Wher
e hashebeen?Wherewouldheli
ketof
inishup?Toask
hi
mself-

Am Ipr
oudoft
hemanneri
nwhi
chmyl
i
fehasbeenl
edt
odat
e?

Whatregret
sdoIhav
e,howwoul
dIhav
eli
kedt
hingst
o
bedi
ff
er ent
?

Hav
eIendeavouredtoexpl
oremynat
ural
tal
ent
s,mygi
ft
sto
t
hei
rful
l
estextent?

HaveIj
ustbeenr
esi
gnedt
oli
fe,accept
edwhatwasof
fer
edand
f
eltt
hatIwasget
ti
ngnomorethanIdeser
ved?

HaveIbeenaf
raidt
otrytobediff
erentbecauseoffearofwhat
ot
hersmightt
hinkordo-orbecauseofawkwar dnessonmy
ownpart?

Whatwoul
dIhav
echangedi
fIhadbeengi
vent
hepowert
odo

so?Howwi
l
lIchangemyl
i
fenow?

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QUESTI
ONSONLESSONNI
NE
Pl
easeanswert
hef ol
l
owingquestionsusi
ngnomor et
han75wor
dsf
or
each.
I
ncorpor
atethequesti
onswit
hinyour
answers(eg.t
henumberofdaysintheyear
i
s365)

Quest
ion1. St
atehowr
ecov
erymustbeseen.
Quest
ion2. Whatshouldbel
ookedonaspar
tofaposi
ti
ve
suppor
tsystem?
Quest
ion3. Whatrecommendat
ionsar
emader
egar
dingsucha
suppor
tsyst
em?
Quest
ion4. St
atet
hepr
imar
yconcer
nsofhumani
sti
cpsy
chol
ogy
.
Quest
ion5. Stat
ewhatoccur
sini
ndivi
dual
swhohav
e
devel
opedaposi
ti
veat
ti
tudetoli
fe.
Quest
ion6. Whati
sthebel
i
eft
hatsuchaposi
ti
vei
ndi
vi
dual
hol
ds?Quest
ion7. St
atet
hegi
venst
epst
hatar
eseenasessent
ial
t
orecov
ery
.Quest
ion8. Howcant
hesi
zeofaper
son'
swor
ldbe
assessed?
Quest
ion9. Whatoccurswhenacl
i
entent
erst
hef
eel
i
ng
wor
ldofother
s?
Quest
ion10. St
atet
hecommi
tmentacl
i
entmustmaket
ohi
msel
f.
Quest
ion11. Whyisasenseofisol
ati
onseent
obe
dest
ruct
iveanddi
mini
shing?
Quest
ion12. Whencansuggest
iont
her
apybeanef
fect
ivet
ool
?
Gi
vedetai
l
s.

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NGSERVI
CES WWW.
NEETATCS.
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