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 To C. J., Carter, and Charlotte
—David Kroenke

To Courtney, Noah, Fiona, Layla, and Henry

—Randy Boyle
 Contents Overview
Experiencing MIS offers basic topic coverage of MIS in its 12 chapters and more in-
depth, expanded coverage in its chapter extensions. This modular organization allows
you to pick and choose among those topics. Here chapter extensions are shown below
the chapters to which they are related. You will preserve continuity if you use each of
the 12 chapters in sequence. In most cases, a chapter extension can be covered any time
in the course after its related chapter. You need not use any of the chapter extensions
if time is short.

viii
Brief Contents
Part 1 Why MIS?
1 The Importance of MIS
CE 1 Introduction to Microsoft
Excel 2019 347
2 Organizational Strategy,
Information Systems, and
Competitive Advantage
1 CE 10 Collaborative Information
Systems for Student Projects 499
3
8 Processes, Organizations,
and Information Systems 197
CE 11 Enterprise Resource
Planning (ERP) Systems 519
29 CE 12 Supply Chain Management 533

3 Business Intelligence Systems 55 9 Social Media Information

Systems 227
CE 2 Artificial Intelligence
and Automation 369 CE 13 Enterprise Social Networks
and Knowledge Management 541
CE 3 Database Marketing 383

CE 4 Reporting Systems and OLAP 391

Part 4 Information Systems
Management 259
Part 2 Information Technology 81 10 Information Systems
Security 261
4 Hardware and Software 83
CE 14 Data Breaches 555
CE 5 Mobile Systems 403
11 Information Systems
5 Database Processing 117 Management 295
CE 6 Database Design 419 CE 15 International MIS 567

CE 7 Using Microsoft Access 2019 433 12 Information Systems

Development 319
CE 8 Using Excel and Access
Together 453 CE 16 Systems Development Project
Management 585
6 The Cloud 147
CE 17 Agile Development 597
CE 9 Network and Cloud Technology 481
CE 18 Business Process Management 607
Part 3 Using IS for Competitive
Advantage 175
7 Collaboration Information Systems for
Decision Making, Problem
Solving, and Project Management 177
ix
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Contents
Preface
About the Authors
xx
xxix
2 Organizational Strategy, Information
Systems, and Competitive Advantage 29
Part 1 Why MIS? 1 1. How Does Organizational Strategy Determine
Information Systems Structure? 31
1 The Importance of MIS 3 2. What Five Forces Determine Industry Structure? 31
3. How Does Analysis of Industry Structure
1. Why Is Introduction to MIS the Most Important
Determine Competitive Strategy? 33
Class in the Business School? 5
4. How Does Competitive Strategy Determine
The Digital Revolution 5
Value Chain Structure? 33
Evolving Capabilities 6
Primary Activities in the Value Chain 34
Moore’s Law 6
Support Activities in the Value Chain 35
Metcalfe’s Law 7
Value Chain Linkages 35
Other Forces Pushing Digital Change 7
5. How Do Business Processes Generate Value? 36
This Is the Most Important Class in the School
How Best Bikes Works 36
of Business 8
The Existing Best Bikes Process 36
2. How Will MIS Affect Me? 9
How Best Bikes Processes Must Change to
How Can I Attain Job Security? 9
Support 3D Printing 38
How Can Intro to MIS Help You Learn Nonroutine
6. How Does Competitive Strategy Determine
Skills? 9
Business Processes and the Structure of Information
3. Why Are MIS-Related Jobs in High Demand? 11 Systems? 39
What Is the Bottom Line? 13 7. How Do Information Systems Provide Competitive
4. What Is MIS? 13 Advantages? 40
■■ So What?: A Is for Alphabet 14 Competitive Advantage Via Products 41
Components of an Information System 15 ■■ So What?: Amazon Eats Whole Foods 42
Management and Use of Information Systems 15 Competitive Advantage Via Business Processes 44
Achieving Strategies 16 How Can an Organization Use IS to Create Competitive
5. What Is Information? 17 Advantages? 44
Definitions Vary 17 How Does This System Create a Competitive Advantage? 45
Where Is Information? 17 How does the knowledge in this chapter help you? 45

6. What Data Characteristics Are Necessary ■■ Ethics Guide: The Lure of Love Bots 46
for Quality Information? 18 ■■ Career Guide 47
Accurate 18 Active Review 48 • Key Terms and Concepts 49 • End of
Timely 19 Chapter Questions 49 • Collaboration Exercise 2 50 • Case
Study 2 51 • Endnotes 53
Relevant 19
Just Barely Sufficient 19
3 Business Intelligence Systems 55
Worth Its Cost 19
How does the knowledge in this chapter help you? 20 1. How Do Organizations Use Business
Intelligence (BI) Systems? 57
■■ Ethics Guide: Ethics and Professional Responsibility 20
How Do Organizations Use BI? 57
■■ Career Guide: Five-Component Careers 22
What Are Typical Uses for Business Intelligence? 58
Active Review 23 • Key Terms and Concepts 24 • End of Chapter
Questions 24 • Collaboration Exercise 1 25 • Case Study 1 26 2. What Are the Three Primary Activities in the BI Process? 60
• Endnotes 27 Using Business Intelligence to Find Candidate Parts 60

xi
xii Contents

3. How Do Organizations Use Data Warehouses Active Review 110 • Key Terms and Concepts 110 • End of
and Data Marts to Acquire Data? 63 Chapter Questions 111 • Collaboration Exercise 4 111 • Case
Study 4 112 • Endnotes 114
Problems with Operational Data 65
Data Warehouses Versus Data Marts 66 5 Database Processing 117
4. What Are Three Techniques for Processing BI Data? 67
1. Why Do You Need to Know About Databases? 119
Reporting Analysis 67
Reasons for Learning Database Technology 119
Data Mining Analysis 68
What Is the Purpose of a Database? 119
Big Data 69
2. What Is a Database? 121
5. What Are the Alternatives for Publishing BI? 71
Relationships Among Rows 122
Characteristics of BI Publishing Alternatives 71
Metadata 123
■■ So What?: Geofencing for Business? 72
3. What Is a Database Management System (DBMS)? 124
What Are the Two Functions of a BI Server? 73
■■ So What?: Slick Analytics 125
How does the knowledge in this chapter help you? 74
4. How Do Database Applications Make Databases
■■ Ethics Guide: MIS-diagnosis 74
More Useful? 128
■■ Career Guide 76 Traditional Forms, Queries, Reports, and
Active Review 76 • Key Terms and Concepts 77 • End of Applications 128
Chapter Questions 77 • Collaboration Exercise 3 77 • Case
Browser Forms, Reports, Queries, and Applications 130
Study 3 78 • Endnotes 80
Multiuser Processing 131

Part 2 Information Technology 81 5. How Can eHermes Benefit from a Database System? 132
6. What Are Nontraditional DBMS Products? 133
4 Hardware and Software 83 Need to Store New Data Types Differently 133
Need for Faster Processing Using Many Servers 134
1. What Do Business Professionals Need to Know About
Computer Hardware? 85 Nontraditional DBMS Types 134
Hardware Components 85 Will These New Products Replace the Relational Model? 134
Types of Hardware 85 What Do Nonrelational DBMS Mean for you? 135
Computer Data 86 How does the knowledge in this chapter help you? 135

2. How Can New Hardware Affect Competitive ■■ Ethics Guide: Mining at Work 135
Strategies? 89 ■■ Career Guide 137
The Internet of Things 89 Active Review 138 • Key Terms and Concepts 138 • End of
Digital Reality Devices 90 Chapter Questions 139 • Collaboration Exercise 5 140 • Case
Study 5 140 • Endnotes 145
Self-Driving Cars 93

6
■■ So What?: New from CES 2019 95
The Cloud 147
3D Printing 96
Cryptocurrencies 96 1. Why Is the Cloud the Future for Most Organizations? 148
3. What Do Business Professionals Need to Know About Cloud Computing 149
Software? 97 Why Do Organizations Prefer the Cloud? 150
What Are the Major Operating Systems? 99 When Does the Cloud Not Make Sense? 152
Virtualization 101 2. How Do Organizations Use the Cloud? 153
Owning Versus Licensing 103 Resource Elasticity 153
What Types of Applications Exist, and How Do Pooling Resources 154
Organizations Obtain Them? 103 Over the Internet 154
What Is Firmware? 104 Cloud Services from Cloud Vendors 155
4. Is Open Source Software a Viable Alternative? 105 Content Delivery Networks 157
Why Do Programmers Volunteer Their Services? 105 Using Web Services Internally 159
How Does Open Source Work? 106 3. How Can eHermes Use the Cloud? 160
So, Is Open Source Viable? 107 SaaS Services at eHermes 160
How does the knowledge in this chapter PaaS Services at eHermes 160
help you? 107
IaaS Services at eHermes 161
■■ Ethics Guide: Free Apps for Data 107 4. How Can Organizations Use Cloud
■■ Career Guide 109 Services Securely? 161
 Contents xiii

Virtual Private Network (VPN) 161 How Do Processes Vary by Organizational

Using a Private Cloud 162 Scope? 200
Using a Virtual Private Cloud 164 2. How Can Information Systems Improve
■■ So What?: IRS Systems Overtaxed 164 Process Quality? 202
How Can Processes Be Improved? 203
5. What Does the Cloud Mean for Your Future? 165
How Can Information Systems Improve
How does the knowledge in this chapter help you? 167
Process Quality? 203
■■ Ethics Guide: Reverse Engineering Privacy 168
3. How Do Enterprise Systems Solve the Problems
■■ Career Guide 169 of Departmental Silos? 204
Active Review 170 • Key Terms and Concepts 171 • End of
What Are the Problems of Information Silos? 204
Chapter Questions 171 • Collaboration Exercise 6 171 • Case
Study 6 172 • Endnotes 173 How Do Organizations Solve the Problems
of Information Silos? 206
An Enterprise System for Patient Discharge 207
Part 3 Using IS for Competitive 4. How Do CRM, ERP, and EAI Support Enterprise
Advantage 175 Processes? 207

7 Collaboration Information Systems The Need for Business Process Engineering 208
Emergence of Enterprise Application Solutions 208
for Decision Making, Problem
Customer Relationship Management (CRM) 209
Solving, and Project Management 177
■■ So What?: Digital Dining 210
1. What Are the Two Key Characteristics of Enterprise Resource Planning (ERP) 211
Collaboration? 179
Enterprise Application Integration (EAI) 212
Importance of Constructive Criticism 179
5. What Are the Challenges of Implementing
Guidelines for Giving and Receiving Constructive and Upgrading Enterprise Information Systems? 213
Criticism 181
6. How Do Inter-Enterprise IS Solve the Problems
Warning! 181 of Enterprise Silos? 215
2. What Are Three Criteria for Successful Collaboration? 182 How does the knowledge in this chapter help you? 217
Successful Outcome 182 ■■ Ethics Guide: Paid Deletion 217
Growth in Team Capability 182
■■ Career Guide 218
Meaningful and Satisfying Experience 183
Active Review 219 • Key Terms and Concepts 220 • End
3. What Are the Four Primary Purposes of Collaboration? 183 of Chapter Questions 220 • Collaboration Exercise 8 220 •
Becoming Informed 184 Case Study 8 223 • Endnotes 225
Making Decisions
Solving Problems
184
186
9 Social Media Information Systems 227
Managing Projects 186 1. What Is a Social Media Information System (SMIS)? 229
■■ So What?: Future of the Gig Economy 188 Three SMIS Roles 229
4. What Are the Components and Functions of a SMIS Components 232
Collaboration Information System? 189 2. How Do SMIS Advance Organizational Strategy? 234
The Five Collaboration System Components 189 Social Media and the Sales and Marketing
Primary Functions: Communication and Content Activity 234
Sharing 190 Social Media and Customer Service 235
How does the knowledge in this chapter help you? 191 Social Media and Inbound and Outbound Logistics 235
■■ Ethics Guide: Big Brother Wearables 191 Social Media and Manufacturing and Operations 236
■■ Career Guide 192 Social Media and Human Resources 236
Active Review 193 • Key Terms and Concepts 193 • End of ■■ So What?: Enhanced Golf Fan 237
Chapter Questions 194 • Collaboration Exercise 7 194 • Case 3. How Do SMIS Increase Social Capital? 238
Study 7 194 • Endnotes 196
What Is the Value of Social Capital? 239

8 Processes, Organizations, and How Do Social Networks Add Value to

Businesses? 240
Information Systems 197
Using Social Networking to Increase the Number
1. What Are the Basic Types of Processes? 199 of Relationships 240
How Do Structured Processes Differ From Dynamic Using Social Networks to Increase the Strength
Processes? 199 of Relationships 240
xiv Contents

Using Social Networks to Connect to Those Systems Procedures 284

with More Resources 242 Security Monitoring 285
4. How Do (Some) Companies Earn Revenue 8. How Should Organizations Respond to
from Social Media? 243 Security Incidents? 286
You Are the Product 243 How does the knowledge in this chapter help you? 287
Revenue Models for Social Media 244 ■■ Ethics Guide: Web Recording Everything 287
Does Mobility Reduce Online Ad Revenue? 245 ■■ Career Guide 289
5. How Can Organizations Address SMIS Active Review 290 • Key Terms and Concepts 290 •
Security Concerns? 246 End of Chapter Questions 291 • Collaboration
Managing the Risk of Employee Communication 247 Exercise 10 291 • Case Study 10 292 • Endnotes 293
Managing the Risk of Inappropriate Content 247
11 Information Systems Management 295
6. Where Is Social Media Taking Us? 250
How does the knowledge in this chapter 1. What Are the Functions and Organization
help you? 251 of the IS Department? 297
■■ Ethics Guide: Synthetic Friends 251 How Is the IS Department Organized? 297
■■ Career Guide 252 Security Officers 299
Active Review 253 • Key Terms and Concepts 254 • End of What IS-Related Job Positions Exist? 299
Chapter Questions 254 • Collaboration Exercise 9 254 • 2. How Do Organizations Plan the Use of IS? 301
Case Study 9 255 • Endnotes 257 Align Information Systems with Organizational
Strategy 301
Part 4 Information Systems Communicate IS Issues to the Executive Group 302
Management 259 Develop Priorities and Enforce Them Within
the IS Department 302
10 Information Systems Security 261 Sponsor the Steering Committee 302
1. What Is the Goal of Information Systems 3. What Are the Advantages and Disadvantages
Security? 263 of Outsourcing? 303
The IS Security Threat/Loss Scenario 263 Outsourcing Information Systems 303
What Are the Sources of Threats? 265 ■■ So What?: Poor Data Management at Facebook 304

What Types of Security Loss Exist? 266 International Outsourcing 306

Goal of Information Systems Security 268 What Are the Outsourcing Alternatives? 307
2. How Big Is the Computer Security Problem? 268 What Are the Risks of Outsourcing? 308
3. How Should You Respond to Security Threats? 270 4. What Are Your User Rights and Responsibilities? 310
4. How Should Organizations Respond to Security Your User Rights 310
Threats? 272 Your User Responsibilities 311
■■ So What?: Largest! Data! Breach! Ever! 273 How does the knowledge in this chapter help you? 312
5. How Can Technical Safeguards Protect ■■ Ethics Guide: Training Your Replacement 312
Against Security Threats? 274
■■ Career Guide 313
Identification and Authentication 274 Active Review 314 • Key Terms and Concepts 315 • End of
Single Sign-on for Multiple Systems 275 Chapter Questions 315 • Collaboration Exercise 11 315 • Case
Encryption 275 Study 11 316 • Endnotes 318

Firewalls
Malware Protection
277
277
12 Information Systems
Development 319
Design for Secure Applications 279
6. How Can Data Safeguards Protect 1. What Is Systems Development? 321
Against Security Threats? 279 2. Why Is Systems Development Difficult
Legal Safeguards for Data 280 and Risky? 322
7. How Can Human Safeguards Protect The Difficulty of Requirements Determination 322
Against Security Threats? 280 Changes in Requirements 323
Human Safeguards for Employees 281 Scheduling and Budgeting Difficulties 323
Human Safeguards for Nonemployee Personnel 283 Changing Technology 324
Account Administration 283 Diseconomies of Scale 324
 Contents xv

Is It Really So Bleak? 324 Procedure Design 332

3. What Are the Five Phases of the SDLC? 325 Design of Job Descriptions 333
4. How Is System Definition Accomplished? 326 7. How Is an Information System Implemented? 333
Define System Goals and Scope 326 System Testing 333
Assess Feasibility 327 System Conversion 334
Form a Project Team 327 8. What Are the Tasks for System Maintenance? 335
5. What Is the Users’ Role in the Requirements 9. What Are Some of the Problems With the SDLC? 336
Phase? 328 The SDLC Waterfall 336
Determine Requirements 328 Requirements Documentation Difficulty 337
Approve Requirements 329 Scheduling and Budgeting Difficulties 337
Role of a Prototype 329 How does the knowledge in this chapter help you? 337
6. How Are the Five Components Designed? 330 ■■ Ethics Guide: Engineered Slowdown 338
Hardware Design 330 ■■ Career Guide: Developing Your Personal Brand 339
■■ So What?: Banking on IoT 330 Active Review 341 • Key Terms and Concepts 341 • End of
Software Design 332 Chapter Questions 342 • Collaboration Exercise 12 342 • Case
Study 12 343 • Endnotes 345
Database Design 332

Chapter Extensions

Chapter Extension 1: Machine Learning 378

IBM’s Watson 379
Introduction to Microsoft Active Review 381 • Key Terms and Concepts 381 • End of
Excel 2019 347 Chapter Questions 381 • Endnotes 382

1. What Is a Spreadsheet? 347

2. How Do You Get Started with Excel? 348 Chapter Extension 3:
3. How Can You Enter Data? 351 Database Marketing 383
Key in the Data 351
1. What Is a Database Marketing Opportunity? 383
Let Excel Add the Data Using a Pattern 352
2. How Does RFM Analysis Classify Customers? 384
4. How Can You Insert and Delete Rows and Columns
3. How Does Market-Basket Analysis Identify
and Change Their Size? 356
Cross-Selling Opportunities? 385
5. How Can You Format Data? 359
4. How Do Decision Trees Identify Market
6. How Can You Create a (Simple) Formula? 360 Segments? 386
7. How Can You Print Results? 364 A Decision Tree for Student Performance 387
Active Review 366 • Key Terms and Concepts 367 • End
of Chapter Questions 367
A Decision Tree for Loan Evaluation 388
Active Review 389 • Key Terms and Concepts 390 • End of
Chapter Questions 390 • Endnotes 390
Chapter Extension 2:
Artificial Intelligence and Automation 369 Chapter Extension 4:
1. Why Is Artificial Intelligence Important? 369 Reporting Systems and OLAP 391
Advances in AI 370
1. How Do Reporting Systems Enable People
2. How Will AI and Automation Affect Organizations? 371 to Create Information? 391
Benefits of Automated Labor 372 2. What Are the Components and Characteristics
3. How Will AI Affect Me? 374 of Reporting Systems? 394
Unwanted Dirty Jobs 374 Report Type 394
Retraining and Retooling 375 Report Media 395
Surviving a Shifting Workplace 375 Report Mode 396
4. What Is the Goal of AI? 376 3. How Are Reports Authored, Managed, and
Integrated Enabler of Other Technology 376 Delivered? 396
5. How Does AI Work? 378 Report Authoring 396
xvi Contents

Report Management 396 Active Review 431 • Key Terms and Concepts 432 • End of
Report Delivery 397 Chapter Questions 432 • Endnote 432

4. How Are OLAP Reports Dynamic? 398

Active Review 400 • Key Terms and Concepts 401 • End of Chapter Extension 7:
Chapter Questions 401
Using Microsoft Access 2019 433
Chapter Extension 5: 1. How Do You Create Tables? 433
Mobile Systems 403 Starting Access 434
Creating Tables 434
1. What Are Mobile Systems? 403
2. How Do You Create Relationships? 438
2. Why Are Mobile Systems Important? 403
3. How Do You Create a Data Entry Form? 441
Hardware 404
4. How Do You Create Queries Using the Query
Software 404 Design Tool? 444
Data 405 5. How Do You Create a Report? 446
Procedures 406 Active Review 451 • End of Chapter Questions 452
People 406
3. How Do Native and Web-based Mobile Chapter Extension 8:
Applications Compare? 407
Using Excel and Access Together 453
Developing Native Mobile Applications 407
Developing Web Mobile Applications 408 1. Why Use Excel and Access Together? 453
Which Is Better? 409 2. What Is Import/Export? 454
4. What Characterizes Quality Mobile User Import/Export of Text Data 454
Experiences? 409 Import/Export of Excel and Access Data 457
Feature Content 410 3. How Can You Create Charts with Excel? 458
Use Context-Sensitive Chrome 410 Creating a Pie Chart 458
Provide Animation and Lively Behavior 411 Creating a Column Chart 460
Design to Scale and Share 411 4. How Can You Create Group Totals in Access? 460
Use the Cloud 412 5. How Can You Use Excel to Graph Access Data? 466
5. What Are the Challenges of Personal Mobile 6. How Can You Use Access to Report Excel Data? 469
Devices at Work? 413 7. How Can You Combine Excel and Access to
Advantages and Disadvantages of Employee Use Analyze Data? 474
of Mobile Systems at Work 414 Active Review 478 • Key Terms and Concepts 479 • End of
Survey of Organizational BYOD Policy 415 Chapter Questions 479 • Endnote 479
Active Review 416 • Key Terms and Concepts
Chapter Questions 417 • Endnotes 417
417 • End of
Chapter Extension 9:
Network and Cloud Technology 481
Chapter Extension 6: 1. What Is a Computer Network? 481
Database Design 419 2. What Are the Components of a LAN? 482
1. Who Will Volunteer? 419 Connecting Your LAN to the Internet 484
2. How Are Database Application Systems 3. How Does the Internet Work? 485
Developed? 420 The Internet and the U.S. Postal System 485
3. What Are the Components of the Entity-Relationship Step 1: Assemble Package (Packets) 485
Data Model? 421 Step 2: Put Name on Package (Domain Names) 486
Entities 421 Step 3: Look Up Address (IP Address) 486
Relationships 422 Step 4: Put Address on Package (IP Address
4. How Is a Data Model Transformed into a Database on Packet) 487
Design? 424 Step 5: Put Registered Mail Sticker on
Normalization 424 Package (TCP) 488
Representing Relationships 426 Step 6: Ship Package (Packets Transported by
5. What Is the Users’ Role? 428 Carriers) 488
6. Who Will Volunteer? (Continued) 429 4. How Do Web Servers Support the Cloud? 489
 Contents xvii

Three-Tier Architecture 490 3. How Are ERP Systems Implemented

Watch the Three Tiers in Action! 490 and Upgraded? 526
Service-Oriented Architecture (SOA) 491 4. What Types of Organizations Use ERP? 527
Internet Protocols 494 ERP by Industry Type 527
TCP/IP Protocol Architecture 494 ERP by Organization Size 527
Active Review 497 • Key Terms and Concepts 497 • End of International ERP 528
Chapter Questions 498 • Endnote 498
5. How Do the Major ERP Vendors Compare? 528
ERP Market Leaders 528
Chapter Extension 10: ERP Products 529
ERP in the Future 531
Collaborative Information Systems Active Review 531 • Key Terms and Concepts 532 • End of
for Student Projects 499 Chapter Questions 532 • Endnotes 532

1. What Are the IS Requirements for Student

Project Collaborations? 499 Chapter Extension 12:
Required Features 499 Supply Chain Management 533
Nice-to-Have Features 500
1. What Are Typical Inter-Enterprise Processes? 533
Collaboration Tool Characteristics 500
2. What Is a Supply Chain? 534
2. How Can You Use Collaboration Tools to
Improve Team Communication? 501 3. What Factors Affect Supply Chain
Performance? 535
3. How Can You Use Collaboration Tools to
Share Content? 503 4. How Does Supply Chain Profitability Differ
from Organizational Profitability? 536
Shared Content with No Control 505
5. What Is the Bullwhip Effect? 537
Shared Content with Version Management
on Google Drive 505 6. How Do Information Systems Affect Supply
Chain Performance? 538
Shared Content with Version Control 507
Active Review 539 • Key Terms and Concepts 539 • End of
4. How Can You Use Collaboration Tools to Chapter Questions 540 • Endnotes 540
Manage Tasks? 510
Sharing a Task List on Google Drive 511 Chapter Extension 13:
Sharing a Task List Using Microsoft
SharePoint 512 Enterprise Social Networks and
5. Which Collaboration Information System Is Knowledge Management 541
Right for Your Team? 513 1. How Do Organizations Develop an
The Minimal Collaboration Tool Set 513 Effective SMIS? 541
The Good Collaboration Tool Set 513 Step 1: Define Your Goals 542
The Comprehensive Collaboration Tool Set 514 Step 2: Identify Success Metrics 542
Choosing the Set for Your Team 515 Step 3: Identify the Target Audience 543
Don’t Forget Procedures and People! 515 Step 4: Define Your Value 543
Active Review 516 • Key Terms and Concepts 517 • End of
Step 5: Make Personal Connections 544
Chapter Questions 517 • Endnotes 517
Step 6: Gather and Analyze Data 544

Chapter Extension 11: 2. What Is an Enterprise Social Network (ESN)? 545

Enterprise 2.0 545
Enterprise Resource Planning (ERP) Changing Communication 546
Systems 519 Deploying Successful Enterprise Social
Networks 546
1. What Is the Purpose of ERP Systems? 519
3. What Are the Benefits of Knowledge
2. What Are the Elements of an ERP Solution? 522
Management? 547
Hardware 522
4. What Are Expert Systems? 548
Software: ERP Application Programs 523
5. What Are Content Management Systems? 549
Data: ERP Databases 523
What Are the Challenges of Content Management? 550
Procedures: Business Process Procedures 524
What Are Content Management Application
People: Training and Consulting 524 Alternatives? 550
xviii Contents

Active Review 551 • Key Terms and Concepts 552 • End of Cultural Norms 579
Chapter Questions 552 • Endnotes 552 5. What Are the Challenges of International IS

Chapter Extension 14:

Management? 579
Why Is International Information Systems
Data Breaches 555 Development More Challenging? 579
What Are the Challenges of International
1. What Is a Data Breach? 555
Project Management? 580
Why Do Data Breaches Happen? 556
What Are the Challenges of International IS
2. How Do Data Breaches Happen? 557 Management? 582
Hitting Target 557 Active Review 583 • Key Terms and Concepts 583 • End of
How Did They Do It? 557 Chapter Questions 584 • Endnotes 584

The Damage 558

3. How Should Organizations Respond Chapter Extension 16:
to Data Breaches? 559
Respond Quickly 559 Systems Development Project
Plan for a Data Breach 560 Management 585
Be Honest about the Breach 560
1. Why Is Formalized Project Management Necessary? 585
4. What Are the Legal Consequences of
2. What Are the Trade-Offs in Requirements,
a Data Breach? 560
Cost, and Time? 586
5. How Can Data Breaches Be Prevented? 562
3. What Are the Dimensions of Project Management? 587
6. What Is Your Role in IS Security? 563
4. How Does a Work Breakdown Structure
Strong Passwords 563 Drive Project Management? 589
Password Etiquette 564 5. What Is the Biggest Challenge for Planning
Active Review 564 • Key Terms and Concepts 565 • End of
a Systems Development Project? 592
Chapter Questions 565 • Endnotes 565
6. What Are the Biggest Challenges for Managing

Chapter Extension 15: a Systems Development Project?

7. What Is the Single Most Important Task
593

International MIS 567 for Users on a Systems Development Project? 594

Active Review 595 • Key Terms and Concepts 596 • End of
1. How Does the Global Economy Affect Chapter Questions 596 • Endnotes 596
Organizations and Processes? 567
How Does the Global Economy Change the Chapter Extension 17:
Competitive Environment? 568
How Does the Emerging Global Economy Change Agile Development 597
Competitive Strategy? 569 1. Why Is the SDLC Losing Credibility? 597
How Does the Global Economy Change Value 2. What Are the Principles of Agile Development
Chains and Business Processes? 571 Methodologies? 598
2. What Are the Characteristics of International 3. What Is the Scrum Process? 600
IS Components? 571
Scrum Essentials 600
What’s Required to Localize Software? 572
When Are We Done? 601
IBM’s Watson Learns Korean 573
Key Roles 602
What Are the Problems and Issues of Global Databases? 573
4. How Do Requirements Drive the Scrum Process? 602
What Are the Challenges of International
Creating Requirements Tasks 603
Enterprise Applications? 574
Scheduling Tasks 603
3. How Do Inter-Enterprise IS Facilitate
Globalization? 575 Committing to Finish Tasks 604

How Do Global Information Systems Affect Hocus-Pocus? 604

Active Review 604 • Key Terms and Concepts 605 • End of
Supply Chain Profitability? 575
Chapter Questions 605 • Endnotes 605
What IS the Economic Effect of Global Manufacturing? 576
How Does Social Media Affect International Business? 576
Chapter Extension 18:
4. What Are the Security Challenges of
International IS? 577 Business Process Management 607
Legal Environment 577 1. Why Do Organizations Need to Manage
Physical Security 578 Business Processes? 607
 Contents xix

A Sample Ordering Business Process 607 5 How Is BPM Practiced in the Real World? 616
Why Does This Process Need Management? 608 Defining the Process Problem 616
2. What Are the Stages of Business Process Designing the New Process 618
Management (BPM)? 610 Create Process Components 618
3. How Do Business Processes and Information Implement New Processes 618
Systems Relate? 611 Active Review 619 • Key Terms and Concepts 619 • End of
4. Which Come First: Business Processes Chapter Questions 620
or Information Systems? 613
Business Processes First 613 Application Exercises 621

Information System First 614 Glossary 639

Another Factor: Off-the-Shelf Software 614 Index 653
And the Answer Is ... 615
Preface
In Chapter 1, we claim that MIS is the most important class
in the business curriculum. That’s a bold statement, and ev-
ery year we ask whether it remains true. Is there any dis-
cipline having a greater impact on contemporary business
and government than IS? We continue to doubt there is.
Every year brings important new technology to organiza-
tions, and many of these organizations respond by creating
innovative applications that increase productivity and help
them accomplish their strategies.
Over the past year, we’ve seen long-discussed innova-
tions take big leaps forward. Self-driving vehicles made
huge strides over the past year. Uber, Tesla Motors, and
Waymo (Google) logged millions of autonomous miles.
Nearly all other automobile manufacturers are running
full-tilt to turn their traditional cars into fully autonomous
smart cars. A recent study by Intel estimates self-driving ve-
hicle services will be worth $7 trillion by 2050.1 Consider
what will happen when Amazon starts formal adoption of
the self-driving trucks they’re currently testing. It could re-
duce shipping costs by 80 percent!
At the annual Consumer Electronics Show (CES) in
2018, Toyota announced an autonomous concept vehicle
named the e-Palette that the company believes will fulfill
a role in an emerging mobility as a service (MaaS) market.
By mid-2019, Subaru, Suzuki Motor Corp., Mazda Motor
Corp., Isuzu Motors, and Toyota had all invested in a joint
venture to utilize the e-Palette platform.
This year, roll-up TVs were a hit at CES. Harley-
Davidson showed off its new all-electric motorcycle
named LiveWire; it can go 0 to 60 in 3.5 seconds, travel
200 miles on a single charge, and use a power regenera-
tion mode to slow the motorcycle. There were also a gag-
gle of smart devices like Jabra’s smart headphones. The
adaptive headphones are powered by an AI that adapts
to the environment they’re in. They analyze the sounds in
the environment and adjust their noise-canceling abilities
automatically. Businesses see the potential value in smart
devices such as these. They also recognize the need to col-
lect, store, and analyze the data these devices generate. As
a result, jobs in analytics, business intelligence, and Big
Data are all in high demand right now.
Digital reality (sometimes called virtual reality) has re-
ally taken off. Microsoft showed off its second-generation
device named Hololens 2, which will be released in late 2019.
Google also showed off a demo of its device named Magic
Leap, but received a lukewarm reception. Expectations are
high for Magic Leap considering that investors have put a
record-breaking $4.5 billion into this secretive startup.
xx
The reviews for digital reality devices from early adopt-
ers are glowing. These devices will create entirely new types
of companies and could change the way people live, work,
shop, and entertain themselves.
In addition to changing the ways individuals live and
gather data, recent innovations are changing the way com-
panies work, too. For example, over the past year Amazon
experienced tremendous success using Kiva robots in its ful-
fillment centers. It expanded use of these robots to dozens
of warehouses around the world. These 200,000 Kiva robots
have reduced operating costs by 20 percent ($22 million per
warehouse); they have also reduced click-to-ship times by
75 percent.2 If Amazon rolls out these robots to all of its 110
warehouses, it could save billions. Technology—in this case,
an automated workforce—is fundamentally changing the
way organizations operate. It’s enabling them to be more
productive, innovative, and adaptable.
Of course, not all of this year’s technology news has
been good. Large-scale data breaches continue to be a ma-
jor problem. In 2018, some of the largest data breaches
included Marriot International (500M accounts), Under
Armour (150M accounts), and Twitter (330M accounts).
And 2019 looks to be even worse. We’ve already seen losses
by First American Corp (885M accounts), Facebook (540M
accounts), Exactis (340M accounts), and Quora (100M ac-
counts).3 Overall, businesses accounted for 66 percent of
stolen accounts. And these are just a fraction of the total
number of organizations affected this year.
This edition of the text has been updated for these
developments as well as normal revisions that address
emergent technologies like artificial intelligence, machine
learning, cloud-based services, and so on.
All of these changes highlight the fact that more so-
phisticated and demanding users push organizations into
a rapidly changing future—one that requires continual
adjustments in business planning. In order to participate
in this business environment, our graduates need to know
how to apply emerging technologies to better achieve their
organizations’ strategies. Knowledge of MIS is critical to
this endeavor. And this pace continues to remind us of
Carrie Fisher’s statement, “The problem with instantaneous
gratification is that it’s just not fast enough.”
Why This Ninth Edition?
To reiterate the preface of earlier editions, we believe it is
exceedingly important to make frequent adaptations to this
text because of the delays associated with long textbook
 Preface xxi

Table 1 Changes in the Ninth Edition

Chapter Description of Change
1 New eHermes introduction
New and updated charts for CPU and data storage growth
New job sector comparison statistics
Discussion of the MIS skills gap
Updated BLS job statistics for business and MIS occupations
New collaboration exercise (creating a collaboration system)
New section on Information (1-5)
New section on data characteristics (1-6)
New case study (Pluralsight)
2 New eHermes introduction
Chapter content moved up from Chapter 3
New So What? Guide (Amazon Eats Whole Foods)
Added discussion of first and second mover advantages
Added discussion of business processes, BPM, repositories, and activities
Updated Amazon case study
New Career Guide (Senior Learning and Development Specialist)
New Collaboration Exercise (Singing Valley Resort)
New discussion about business process modeling (2-5)
3 New eHermes introduction
Chapter content moved up from Chapter 9
New So What? Guide (Geofencing for Businesses)
Updated Access 2019 images
4 New eHermes introduction
New So What? Guide (New from CES 2019)
New Career Guide (Senior Software Engineer)
Added discussion about cryptocurrencies, Bitcoin, blockchain, and phablets (4-2)
Updated industry statistics throughout the chapter
5 New eHermes introduction
New Ethics Guide (Mining at Work)
New Career Guide (Principal Data Engineer)
New section 5-7 discussing databases at eHermes
Updated images and statistics throughout the chapter
Updated Excel and Access 2019 images
6 New eHermes introduction
New So What? Guide (IRS Systems Overtaxed)
New Ethics Guide (Reverse Engineering Privacy)
Updated industry statistics throughout the chapter
Updated section 6-3 discussing eHermes using the cloud
New Case Study (Salesforce.com)
Updated discussion about telemedicine
New MyLab MIS question about AWS offerings and eHermes
7 New Chapter on Collaboration Information Systems
7-1 What Are the Two Key Characteristics of Collaboration?
7-2 What Are Three Criteria for Successful Collaboration?
7-3 What Are the Four Primary Purposes of Collaboration?
7-4 What Are the Components and Functions of a Collaboration Information System?
New So What? Guide (Future of the Gig Economy)
New Career Guide (Senior Product Manager)
New Ethics Guide (Big Brother Wearables)
xxii Preface

Table 1 Changes in the Ninth Edition (continued )

Chapter Description of Change
New Case Study (Airbnb)
New collaboration exercise
8 New ARES Systems introduction
New discussion on structured versus dynamic processes (8-1)
New discussion of workgroup, enterprise, and inter-enterprise processes (8-1)
New discussion of process efficiency versus process effectiveness (8-2)
New discussion of enterprise application solutions (8-4)
New So What? Guide (Digital Dining)
New Career Guide (Platform Engineer)
9 New Career Guide (Social Media Marketing)
New Case Study (LinkedIn)
New discussion about Geofencing
Updated collaboration exercise
Updated industry statistics and charts throughout the chapter
Updated discussion about the future of social media (9-6)
10 New So What? Guide (Largest! Data! Breach! Ever!)
New Ethics Guide (Web Recording Everything)
New industry statistics and charts throughout the chapter
New discussion about legal safeguards for data including PCI DSS, GLBA, and HIPAA
11 New So What? Guide (Poor Data Management at Facebook)
New Career Guide (Data Governance Officer)
Updated industry statistics and charts throughout the chapter
12 New Ethics Guide (Engineered Slowdown)
New charts and statistics about agile and scrum use
Chapter
Extensions Description of Change
Appl Ex Updated data files
Updated Microsoft Office 2019 compliant files and chapter images
New exercise about Microsoft AI applications Fetch! and How-Old
New exercise about networking commands ping and ipconfig
New exercise about Recuva file recovery
New exercise about Microsoft MakeCode application development
CE1 Chapter content and images updated to Microsoft Excel 2019
CE2 Updated chapter statistics and charts
CE5 Updated mobile statistics
Removed references to depreciated Microsoft charms
CE6 Chapter content and images updated to Microsoft Access 365
CE7 Chapter content and images updated to Microsoft Access 365
CE8 Chapter content and images updated to Microsoft Access 365 and Microsoft Excel 2019
Updated chapter project instructions
CE9 Updated discussion about ICANN and net neutrality
Updated chapter statistics
CE10 New Microsoft Whiteboard example
Updated Google Drive images
Updated SharePoint images
CE11 Updated chapter statistics about ERP leaders and ERP adoption
CE13 Updated chapter statistics and ESN example using Cummins
CE14 Updated data breach statistics and charts
New section on user role in IS security (CE14-6)
New chart showing the most commonly used weak passwords

Chapter Description of Change
CE15 Updated statistics about international Internet access (fixed and mobile)
New discussion of the General Data Protection Regulation (GDPR) law
Updated statistics related to spoken languages
Updated examples of bribery and asset seizure
CE18 Updated images for Microsoft Project Professional 2019
Updated statistics and charts related to agile and scrum usage
revision cycles. Text materials we develop in April of one
year are published in January of the next year and are first
used by students in September—a minimum 17-month
delay.
For some areas of study, a year and a half may not seem
long because little changes in that amount of time. But in MIS,
entire companies can be founded and then sold for billions of
dollars in just a few years. YouTube, for example, was founded
in February 2005 and then sold in November 2006 to Google
for $1.65B (21 months). And that wasn’t just a one-time fluke.
Facebook Inc. started in 2004, led the social media revolution,
and became a public company currently (as of mid-2019) val-
ued at $551B. That’s a whopping $36B in growth per year for
15 years! MIS changes fast—very fast. We hope this new edi-
tion is the most up-to-date MIS textbook available.
The changes in this ninth edition are listed in Table 1.
The chapter on Business Intelligence Systems was pulled
forward to Chapter 3 because of the increased importance
of these systems to all businesses. Every large tech com-
pany has spent considerable resources acquiring artificial
intelligence (AI) companies in the past ten years, including
Google ($3.9 billion), Amazon ($871 million), Apple ($786),
Intel ($776), and Microsoft ($690).4 And that’s not counting
additional internal investments. AI and machine learning
are becoming core parts of these companies’ competitive
advantage. Some of the highest-paying jobs are in AI, busi-
ness analytics, Big Data, and data mining.
Even consumers are being affected. Consumers are inter-
acting with AIs like Alexa, Google, and Siri in their homes on
a daily basis. Machine learning is being used to make person-
alized recommendations for online shoppers. It’s also being
used to create automated Gmail replies, optimize Uber ar-
rival times, and identify which songs you’ll want to listen to.
A new chapter on Collaboration Information Systems
(Chapter 7) was added to Part 3 (MIS in Organizations)
because it focuses on systems in organizations, much like
Chapters 8 and 9 do. MIS professors who reviewed the book
said they assign a lot of group work and that they wanted
content to help their students work more effectively within
their groups. Chapter Extension 10 covers collaboration
software options that students can use to manage their as-
signed projects.
To make room for the new chapter, the content from the
previous edition’s Chapter 2 was split and integrated into this
Preface xxiii
edition’s Chapter 1 and Chapter 2. Content in Chapter 8 was
also expanded to include more discussion about processes in
systems. We hope this new organization of chapters will make
the presentation of the chapters flow more naturally.
Chapters 1 through 6 begin with a new discussion of
eHermes, a startup that provides mobile shopping expe-
riences using self-driving vehicles. Chapters 7 through
12 continue to be introduced by the discussion of ARES
Systems, a cloud-based augmented-reality exercise startup.
In addition to motivating the chapter material, both case
scenarios provide numerous opportunities for students to
practice one of Chapter 1’s key skills: “Assess, evaluate, and
apply emerging technology to business.”
This edition also continues to focus on teaching ethics.
Every Ethics Guide asks students to apply Immanuel Kant’s
categorical imperative, Bentham and Mill’s utilitarianism,
or both to the business situation described in the guide. We
hope you find the ethical considerations rich and deep with
these exercises. The categorical imperative is introduced in the
Ethics Guide in Chapter 1 (pages 20–21), and utilitarianism is
introduced in the Ethics Guide in Chapter 2 (pages 46–47).
As shown in Table 1, additional changes were made to
every chapter, including eight new So What? features, five
new Ethics Guides, seven new Career Guides, and four new
chapter cases. Numerous changes were made throughout
the chapters in an attempt to keep them up-to-date. MIS
moves fast, and to keep the text current, we checked every
fact, data point, sentence, and industry reference for obso-
lescence and replaced them as necessary.
Structure, Organization,
and Appearance of This Text
Teaching today is a very different endeavor than it was
years ago. Students have many more distractions and de-
mands on their time. They are quick to tune in and quick
to tune out, so much so that someone compared their atten-
tion spans to those of Labrador Retriever puppies. We can
lament that fact, but we can’t change it. What we can do is
to meet students where they are and creatively attempt to
obtain their engagement.
We designed this text with that hope and goal in mind.
Every feature of this book is designed to make it easy for
xxiv Preface
students to engage with the content, not by watering it
down but rather, we hope, by making it interesting and rel-
evant to them. This text is not an encyclopedia; it attempts
to teach essential topics well. It does so by providing op-
portunities for students to actively engage with the content,
by providing features to help students better manage their
study time, and by having an appearance that makes it easy
for students to pick up and start.
Active Engagement
The structure of this edition of Experiencing MIS provides
many opportunities for active engagement. Each chapter in-
cludes a So What? feature that contains exercises and ques-
tions for students to answer to demonstrate the relevancy of
the chapter’s material to them. Each chapter also contains
an Ethics Guide that looks at the ethical implications of the
chapter content. These can be used for small in-class exer-
cises. Finally, this edition contains 39 application exercises.
Facilitate Student Study
Today’s students were reared in an environment of constant
stimulation and channel surfing, and it seems nearly impos-
sible for many students to focus on a single topic for more
than a few minutes. Again, we can wish it otherwise, but
short attention spans are students’ and our reality. And re-
cent research does seem to substantiate students’ claim that,
except for texting in class, students can multitask in class
without problem.5
This text is structured to accommodate today’s stu-
dents’ learning styles. First, to help students manage their
time, it is organized around questions. The learning objec-
tives for each chapter or chapter extension are presented as
a list of questions. Each major heading of the material is one
of those questions, and the end of the chapter or extension
includes an Active Review in which students are asked to
demonstrate their learning of the answer to each question.
Students should study until they can answer the questions;
that may be 5 minutes or 5 hours, but their job is to answer
those questions. This technique, from Marilla Svinicki’s re-
search, vastly helps students manage their study time.6
You can also use the questions to structure class sessions
or at least parts of those sessions. You can open class by ask-
ing students to “do the questions.” Go around the room and
call on someone to answer a question or part of one.
Second, students learn more when they are emotion-
ally engaged in the material. The purpose of the vignettes
that introduce each chapter is to raise student emotion;
their purpose is to cause students to care about the chapter
material.
Third, 82 percent of students in the business school pre-
fer visual learning to auditory (voice or word) learning.7 To
make it easier for students to open this book and continue to
read it, interesting and engaging art and photos have been
used. In every instance, however, we have insisted that the photo
or art be related to the topic under discussion; these photos are not
simply eye candy. Pearson allows us to personally review and
approve every photo and art exhibit in this text. We believe
a good book does not have to appear boring, but all art must
be relevant.
Features for Engaging
the Student
Experiencing MIS was written to make it impossible for read-
ers of this text to miss the importance of MIS in business.
The text is designed to be approachable, easy to use, some-
times humorous, with an upbeat and in-your-face attitude,
but always with the goal of underlining the importance of
MIS to all businesspeople in the 21st century.
An important part of making the text approachable was
choosing a modular design. The text consists of 12 short
chapters along with 18 supplemental discussions, called
chapter extensions.
The modular nature of this text is discussed in more de-
tail later in this preface.
Emphasis on Collaboration
As with previous editions, this text emphasizes collabo-
ration. It is one of Reich’s key skills for the 21st-century
professional, as described in Chapter 1. We believe we
need not only to require our students to collaborate but
also to teach them key skills for doing so. Chapter 7 and
Chapter Extension 10 present collaboration techniques
and collaboration information systems, respectively. Each
chapter also includes a collaboration exercise at the end
of the chapter.
Additionally, Pearson Education is sponsoring
Microsoft SharePoint for student use. At your request,
Pearson will set up a SharePoint site collection that your
students can use when responding to the collaboration ex-
ercises at the end of each chapter. Students need nothing
more than a browser to participate. See your Pearson sales
representative for more information.
Opening Scenarios for Parts
and Chapters
Each part and each chapter opens with a scenario intended
to get students involved emotionally. We want students to
mentally place themselves in the situation and to realize
that this situation—or something like it—could happen to
them. Each scenario sets up the chapter’s content and pro-
vides an obvious example of why the chapter is relevant to
Another random document with
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 She realised my advantage, but she wouldn’t retreat. The Cortelyou
women never do. Yet she knew enough to allow the honours of war to
a hard-driven enemy. “The Cortelyou men are gentlemen,” she said.
Wasn’t that a neat way of telling me that I would never fail a woman
in distress? I felt pleased that she understood the family so well as to
have no fear for the conduct of even her bitterest enemy. “Besides,”
she continued, “I like the Cortelyou temper.”
I raised my eyebrows.
“Yes,” she persisted, “it’s an absolutely reliable factor. Now, papa
—” Then she hesitated, realising the slip.
With an older girl I should have let her flounder, and enjoyed it;
but she was so young, and blushed so charmingly that I had to help
her out. “Don’t keep me in suspense about your father,” I said, in my
most interested of tones, as if I truly wished to know something of
that blot on the ‘scutcheon. This was my second mistake, and a bad
one.
“We’ll leave Mr. Dabney Cortelyou out of the conversation, please,”
she retorted, looking me in the eyes. Was there ever a meaner return
for an act of pure charity than that?
By the way, Kate’s eyes are not Cortelyou. I wondered from where
she got them. When we are angry we contract ours, which is ugly.
She opens hers, which is—I tried to make her do it again by saying,
“You should set a better example, then.” No good: she had got back
to her form, and was smiling sweetly.
“They are furiously disappointed so far,” she remarked.
“What an old curiosity shop the world is about other people’s
affairs! It’s no concern of theirs that my grandfather and your”—I
faltered, and went on—“that my grandfather had a row in his family.
We don’t talk of it.” When I said “we” I meant the present company,
but unfortunately Kate took it to mean our faction, and knowing of
her father’s idle blabbing, she didn’t like it.
“Your side has always dodged publicity,” she affirmed viciously,
though smiling winsomely. Kate’s smile must be her strong card.
“We have maintained a dignified silence,” I responded calmly; but
I knew that a dagger thrust below that beautifully modelled throat
would be less cruel.
 She tried to carry the wound bravely. “My father is quite justified
in letting the truth be known,” she insisted.
“Then why don’t you, too, give public house-warmings in the
family-skeleton closet?” I inquired blandly. That was really a
triumph, for Kate had never talked to outsiders about the wretched
business. She couldn’t even respond with what she thought; for if she
said that it was always the side in the wrong which talked, she was no
better off, because we, like her, had kept silence, but her father had
chattered it all over town. She looked down, and I gloated over her
silence, till suddenly I thought I saw a suggestion of moisture on her
down-turned lashes. What I said to myself was not flattering, and
moreover is not fit for publication. What I said aloud I still glow over
with pride when it recurs to memory.
“Beware of the croquette!” I exclaimed hastily. “I’ve just burned
my tongue horribly.” And I reached for the ice-water.
She was as quick as I had been. The Cortelyou girls are quick, but
she—well, I think the ancestress who gave her those eyes must have
been a little quicker.
“You spoke a moment too late,” she replied, looking up at me. “I
had just done the same, and feel like weeping.” I wonder what the
recording angel wrote against those two speeches?
Then suddenly Kate began to laugh.
“What is it?” I queried.
“Taste your croquette,” she suggested.
It was as cool as it should have been hot!
We both laughed so heartily that Mr. Baxter called, “Come; don’t
keep such a good story to yourselves.”
“Pretend you are so engrossed that you didn’t hear,” advised Kate,
simulating the utmost interest. “Aren’t we doing well?”
“Thanks to you,” was my gallant reply.
“Thanks to the Cortelyous,” she declared.
“They might have known,” said I, “that we’d never have a public
circus to please them.”
“Isn’t it nice,” she responded, “since we had to have a fracas, that it
should be between ladies and gentlemen?”
 “Isn’t it?” I acceded. “Just supposing there had been some cad
concerned, who would have written to the papers and talked to
reporters!”
“That was impossible, because we are all Cortelyous,” explained
Kate. I like a girl who stands up for her stock.
“Yes,” I assented. “And that’s the one advantage of family rows.”
“I want to tell you,” she went on, “that you do my father a great
injustice. Some natures are silent in grief or pain, and some must cry
out. Because he talks, merely means that he suffers.”
I longed to quote her remark about leaving her father out of the
conversation, but having told her there were no cads in the family,
the quotation was unavailable. So I merely observed, “Not knowing
Mr. Dabney Cortelyou, I have had no chance to do him justice.”
“But what you hear—” she began, with the proudest of looks; and it
really hurt me to have to interrupt her by saying,—
“Since I only get word of him from his dearest friends I am forced
to take a somewhat jaundiced view of him.”
“I suppose you are surrounded by toadies who pretend to know
him,” she said contemptuously.
I was not to be made angry. I was enjoying the dinner too much.
“It would be a very terrible thing for our mutual friends,” I
continued, “if the breach were ever healed, and we exchanged notes
as to their tattling.”
“Fortunately they are in no danger,” she answered, more cheerfully
—indeed I might say, more gleefully—than it seemed to me the
occasion required.
“Fortunately,” I agreed, out of self-respect. Then I weakened a
little by adding, “But what a pity it is you and I didn’t have the
settling of that farm-line!”
“My father could not have acted otherwise,” she challenged back.
“And the courts decided that my grandfather was right.”
“I should have done just as he did,” she replied.
“Then you acknowledge my grandfather was right?”
“I!”—indignantly.
 “You just assured me you should have done as he did!” I teased,
laughing. “No. Of course both of them were justified in everything
but in their making a legal matter a family quarrel. If we had had it to
do, it would have been done amicably, I think.”
“What makes you so sure?” she asked.
“Because I am sweet-tempered, and you—”
She wouldn’t accept a compliment from an enemy, so interrupted
me with, “My father has one of the finest natures I have ever known.”
“‘Physician, know thyself,’” I quoted, getting in the compliment in
spite of her.
“That’s more than you do,” she replied merrily.
This could be taken in two ways, but I preferred to make it
applicable to her rather than to myself. I said, “Our acquaintance has
been short.”
“But we know all about the stock,” she corrected.
“I’m proud of the family,” I acknowledged; “but don’t let’s be
Ibsenish.”
“I knew you didn’t like him,” said Kate, confidentially. “I don’t
either.”
“He’s rather rough on us old families,” I intimated.
“Sour grapes,” explained Kate. “The wouldn’t-because-I-can’t-be
people always stir up the sediments of my Cortelyou temper.”
“I thought you liked the family temper,” I suggested.
“In anybody but myself,” she told me. “With others it’s really a
great help. Now, with my brothers, I know just how far I can go
safely, and it’s easy to manage them.”
“I suppose that accounts for the ease with which you manage me.”
She laughed, and replied demurely, “I think we are both on our
good behaviour.”
“I’m afraid our respective and respected parents won’t think so.”
This made her look serious, and I wondered if her father could be
brute enough ever to lose that awful temper of his at such a charming
daughter. The thought almost made me lose mine. “They can’t blame
you,” I assured her. “Your father—”
 “Is sure that everything I do is right,” she interjected, “but Mrs.
Pellew?”
“We will not make Mrs. Pellew—”
Kate saw I was going to use her own speech, and she interrupted in
turn. “Of course you are over twenty-one,” she continued, “but the
Cortelyou women always have their way. I hope she won’t be very
bad to you.”
She certainly had paid me off, and to boot, for my earlier speech.
And the nasty thing about it was that any attempt to answer her
would look as if I felt there was truth in her speech, which was really
ridiculous. Though I live with my mother, my friends know who is
the real master of the house.
“Any one living with a Cortelyou woman must confess her
superiority,” I responded, bowing deferentially.
“Yes,” she said, nodding her head knowingly. “People say that she
spoils you. Now I see how you compass it.”
“We have only exchanged Ibsen for Mrs. Grundy,” I complained.
“‘Excelsior’ is a good rule,” announced Kate.
“That’s what you’ll be doing in a moment,” said I, trying to look
doleful, for we were eating the game course.
“How well you act it!” replied Kate. “You ought to go on the stage.
What a pity that you should waste your time on clubs and afternoon
teas!”
“Look here,” I protested, “I’ve done my best all through dinner,
considering my Cortelyou temper, and now, just because it’s so
nearly over that you don’t need me any longer is no reason for
making such speeches. I don’t go to my club once a week, and I
despise afternoon teas.”
“That sampler has become positively threadbare,” retorted Kate. “I
really think it must be worked in worsted, and hung up in all the New
York clubs, like ‘God bless our home!’ and ‘Merry Christmas!’”
“I much prefer hearts to clubs, for a steady trump,” I remarked.
“You play billiards, I presume?”
“Yes,” I innocently replied.
“What’s your average run?”
 It was a tempting bait she shoved under my nose, but I realised the
trap; and was too wary to be caught. “Oh, four, when I’m in good
form.”
“Really?”
“Really.” I did not choose to add that I was talking of the balk-line
game, not caring to be too technical with a woman.
“That’s very curious!” she exclaimed.
“I suppose some devoted friend of mine has told you I’m only a
billiard-marker?” I inquired.
“No—but—”
“But?”
“Nothing.”
“George Washington became President by always telling the
truth.”
“That’s the advantage of being a woman,” replied Kate. “We don’t
have to scheme and plot and crawl for the Presidency.”
“How about spring bonnets?” I mildly insinuated.
“Does your mother have a very bad time persuading you to pay for
hers?” laughed Kate, mischievously.
I didn’t like the question, though I knew she was only teasing, so I
recurred to my question. “You haven’t told me what that ‘nothing’
was,” I persisted.
“I oughtn’t,” urged Kate.
“Then I know you will,” I said confidently.
“Well, Seymour Halsey said to Weedon the other night, ‘I wish you
could play with Jack Pellew, so as to knock some of his airs out of
him!’”
“Why,” I ejaculated, “I could play cushion caroms against your
brother’s straight game and beat him then!”
“I never did believe that story about George Washington,” asserted
Kate, with a singular want of relevance.
“No woman could,” I answered, squaring accounts promptly.
Here I saw the little preliminary flutter among the ladies, and
knowing that I should never speak to Kate again, I said:
 “Miss Cortelyou, I’m afraid an unkind remark of mine a little while
ago gave you pain. You’ve probably forgotten it already, but I never
shall cease to regret I made it.”
“Don’t think of it again,” she replied, kindly, as she rose. “And
thank you for a pleasant evening.”
“Don’t blame me for that,” I pleaded hastily. “It was your own
fault.”
“Not entirely,” denied Kate. “We did it so well that I’m prouder
than ever of the family.”
“I decline to share this honour with my grandfather,” I protested
indignantly. “He couldn’t keep his temper, bother him!”
We were at the door now, and Kate gave me the prettiest of parting
nods and smiles.
“Wasn’t it a pity?” she sighed. That was distinctly nice of her. Just
like a Cortelyou woman.
“Whew! Jack,” whistled Ferdie Gallaudet. “I thought I should die,
and expected to sit on your body at the postmortem.” Ferdie thinks
he’s clever!
“Oh, shut up, Ferdie,” I growled, dropping back into my seat.
“Don’t wonder your temper’s queered,” persisted the little ass.
“‘Wotinell’ did you talk about?”
“Family matters,” I muttered.
“Oh, I say, that’s a bit shiny at the joints. It was too well done to
have verged on that subject.”
“We talked family matters, and enjoyed it,” I insisted.
“Ever hear of George Washington?” inquired Ferdie.
“Kate mentioned him to me to-night, and I promised to put him up
at the Knickerbocker for a month.”
“Kate!” exclaimed Ferdie.
I lighted my cigar.
“Kate!” he repeated, with a rising inflection. “Now look here, I
wasn’t born yesterday.”
“Where’s your family Bible?” I inquired blandly.
 “You’ll be saying next that to-night’s arrangement was by ‘special
request.’”
“You were across the table,” I retorted. “Draw your own
conclusions.”
“I suppose you’ll join her later,” suggested Ferdie, in an irritating
manner.
I wouldn’t be bluffed by him, so I replied pointedly, “I may, to save
her from worse.”
“Give you odds on it,” offered Ferdie.
“I don’t make bets where women are concerned,” I crushingly
responded.
“Sorry the strain has left you so bad-tempered,” said Ferdie, rising.
“There’s Caldwell beckoning to me. Ta, ta!”
I have liked Caldwell ever since.
When we joined the ladies I went over to Kate.
“This is persecution,” she smilingly protested, as she made room
for me on the sofa.
“I know it,” I cheerfully groaned, as I sat down beside her. “But I
had to for the sake of the family.”
“A family is a terrible thing to live up to!” sighed Kate.
“Terrible!” I ejaculated.
“Fortunately it will only be for a moment,” she assured me.
“If you go at once,” I urged, “they’ll all think it’s the feud.”
“What a nuisance!” cried Kate. “I ought to be on my way to a
musical this very minute.”
“On the principle that music hath charms?” I queried.
“Good-night!” she said, holding out her hand. I had already
noticed what pretty hands Kate had.
“Forgive me!” I begged.
“Never!” she replied.
“You are serious?” I questioned, and she understood what I meant
as if I had said it. I do like people who can read between the lines!
She amended her “never” to, “Well, not till I have had my chance
to even the score.”
 “Take it now.”
“I haven’t time.”
“I will submit to anything.”
“My revenge must be deep.”
“I will do the thing I most hate.”
“Even afternoon teas?” laughed Kate, archly.
I faltered in voice while promising, “Even afternoon teas!”
“Then I’ll send you a card for mine,” she ended, and left me,
crushed and hopeless.
⁂
No. That didn’t end the feud. It only led to a truce. For a time
things went very well, but then the quarrel broke out with renewed
force. You see, Kate claimed I spoiled the boy, and I claimed she did
the spoiling. So we submitted it to arbitration. My mother said Kate
was very judicious, and her father declared I was a model parent.
Then we called in his godmother, and she decided we all four spoiled
him. It’s been open war ever since, with an occasional brief cessation
of hostilities whenever Kate kisses me. After the boy’s grown up, I
suppose, peace will come again.
His godmother? Oh! Mrs. Baxter. You see, we couldn’t do less, for
she had talked it all over town that the match was of her making. Her
making! In ten cases out of nine she would have had a disrupted
dinner. It’s lucky for her that Kate was a Cortelyou woman!
 “THE BEST LAID PLANS”

AS ENACTED
IN

Two Social Cups of Tea,

Two Social Jokes, and
One Social Agony.

Scene

Parlour in country house of Mrs. Wycherly.

Characters

Mrs. Wycherly,
Miss Helen Wycherly,
Miss Rose Newcome,
Miss Amy Sherman,
Lord Ferrol,
George Harold,
Steven Harold,
Dennis Grant.

Syllabus

ACT I
A cup of tea and two social jokes.
5.30 P. M. Friday.

ACT II

A cup of tea and one social agony.

5.30 P. M. Tuesday.
 ACT I
Scene.—Parlour in country house with doors r. and l. At back, a
fireplace with open fire. Down centre l., a small table, with
white blotting-pad, large paper-knife, and writing
paraphernalia; and two chairs r. and l. Down centre r., a small
table with tea-service, and chair r. At extreme r. two easy-
chairs.
Mrs. Wycherly sits at writing-desk r. with teacup on table,
reading a letter in her hand. Amy sits at desk l. Helen at tea-
table, making tea. Steven at mantel. George and Dennis seated
at r. with teacups.

Helen. Another cup, mama?

Steven. She doesn’t hear you, Helen.
George. Thanks to his precious letter.
Helen (louder). More tea, mama!
Rose (outside l., calling). Are you having tea, Helen?
Helen. Yes, Rose.
Amy. And something very exciting as well.
George. More exciting even than your novel, I’ll be bound.
Dennis (calling). Bring the chocolates with you, if you haven’t
eaten them all.
Enter Rose, l., with box of chocolates and book.
Rose. What is it?
Dennis. Ask Mrs. Wycherly.
Rose. What is the excitement, Mrs. Wycherly?
George. Louder.
Amy (loudly). Mrs. Wycherly!
Mrs. W. (starting). Oh! What?
George. That is just the problem. Is he a what, or isn’t he?
Dennis (bitterly). I don’t believe it will make the least difference
even if he proves a “What is it.”
 Steven (more bitterly). No, we fellows see how it will be! The
moment “me lud” arrives, we shall be nowhere with you girls.
George. George Augustus Guelph Dunstan, Earl of Ferrol and
Staunton! His very letter of acceptance has made Helen forget that it
is cream—not sugar—that I “omit for want of space.”
Helen. Not at all! If you had been polite you would have given that
cup to Rose. As for his lordling, do you for an instant suppose that I
intend to compete as long as Rose and Amy are here? No, sir—I leave
him to my betters, D. V.
Mrs. W. Well, really, I don’t think that either his titles or his being
in the hands of an oculist is any excuse for making his time so
indefinite (looks at letter). He will be charmed to pay me a visit, “by
next Friday, or perhaps even sooner.” Now isn’t that a nice position
to leave a hostess who wishes to make his stay quite as pleasant as
his papa made mine when I was at the “Towers.” Imagine this
betitled being getting into the Junction by the evening train and then
having to walk over to Beechcroft.
Rose. Oh, wouldn’t it be lovely to see him coming in at the gate, so
wet and muddy that Tiger would make the same mistake that he did
with that poor minister?
Dennis. I hope, if he does have to foot it, he will not bring the usual
number of parcels that the swells on the other side consider as
necessary as those books which Charlie Lamb said “no gentleman
should be without.”
Amy. Mrs. Wycherly, how can this man be two earls at once?
Steven. The English aristocracy finds it convenient to have an alias
now and again.
Mrs. W. I’m not sure, Amy, but I believe it has something to do
with his mother. I never could understand the peerage.
George. Ye gods! to think of a mother with a marriageable
daughter not understanding the peerage!
Helen. I won’t be slandered by you. Marriageable daughter,
indeed!
Rose (scornfully). Yes, isn’t that a regular man’s view of it?
Dennis. Well, I think it’s very creditable to be without a peer.
Amy. That depends on how you appear.
 Rose. And that depends on your appear age.
George (pityingly). Don’t notice them; they’re quite harmless.
Speaking of the peerage, though, did any of you see Labouchere’s
screed in “Truth”?
Mrs. W. I haven’t, for one—what was it?
George. Bass, the proprietor of the pale ale, has just been made a
baron, and this was an editorial on the “Last Addition to the
Beerage.”
Amy. Mrs. Wycherly, do let me have the letter: I want to see what
kind of a hand he writes.

[Mrs. W. passes letter to Amy.

Dennis. There! That’s the way in this life. I’ll be bound you never
wanted to see what my writing was like.
Rose. Well, did you ever want to see Amy’s hand?
Steven. Hers is too small to make it worth while.
Amy (sweetly). Is your tea sweet enough, Steven?
Dennis. Why waste your sweetness on the desert air?
Steven. Thank you, Dennis, but I am not a deserted heir, and don’t
suppose I shall be, till The Right Honourable George Augustus
Guelph Dunstan, Earl of Ferrol and Staunton, puts in his
appearance. Till then, Mrs. Amy Sherman Micawber will never desert
her Steven.
Helen. Really, I think it is very unkind to say all these things before
Lord Ferrol arrives. If you begin like this over the “cheerful and
uninebriating teacup,” with a good dinner not far distant, what will
you say when you have just dragged yourself out of bed to breakfast?
Dennis (fiercely). The talking point will be passed. We shall act!
Bul-lud!!!
George (rising and setting teacup on tea-table). So let it be
understood, if you girls give us the cold shoulder when his lordship
arrives, we will not be responsible for the consequences.
Steven. But don’t say we didn’t warn you.
Helen. Well, you deserve to have the cold shoulder for talking to us
so.
 Rose. Yes, just as if we had all turned tuft-hunters.
Mrs. W. At least it shows modesty. The boys all take for granted
they cannot stand up against the new-comer.
Rose. Oh, Mrs. Wycherly, what nice, honest, guileless men you
must have known when you were a girl! To think that these should
gain the reputation of modesty by their grumbling!
Helen. Yes, dear, they are delusions and snares, having fully
mastered Talleyrand’s aphorism “that words were meant to conceal
ideas.”
Amy. “Put not your trust in kings and princes.”
George. That’s just what we want, only please extend it to the
aristocracy.
Rose. You all deserve to have us leave you to your own devices, as
soon as we can get a decent substitute.
Mrs. W. Well, if Lord Ferrol is anything like his father, I can
promise you no unworthy one, even compared to my boys here.
Steven (crossing down stage to Mrs. W. and bowing). Mrs.
Wycherly, the race does not improve. Why are the daughters no
longer as their mothers were?
Helen. }
Amy. } Oh!!!
Rose. }
Helen (springing to her feet). Mr. Chairman, or Mrs. Chairwoman,
is not the honourable gentleman’s language unparliamentary?
Rose. It’s uncomplimentary, and I believe that is what
unparliamentary generally means.
Amy (rising). I move the expulsion of the honourable gentleman.
Helen (rising). Second the motion.
Omnes. Question! Question! Question!
Mrs. W. (rising with mock solemnity and leaning on desk).
Gentlemen, after the most mature deliberation the speaker must
announce three decisions. First, the language was not
uncomplimentary, and—
 Rose } } Bribery!
Helen } together. } Treachery, treachery!
Amy } } Oh! Oh! Oh!!
Mrs. W. (pounding on table with paper-knife). Order! Order!—
And ergo, not unparliamentary. Secondly, that in consequence the
motion of expulsion is not in order. Thirdly, even if it were in order,
the question could not be taken without debate.
Rose. I appeal to the House.
Dennis (rising). All right! Three to three. Speaker throws casting
vote with us. How do you do—minority?
[Bows.
Helen (rising). Excuse me. We three decline to vote, so there is no
quorum. The question is before the House still, and can be spoken to.
Dennis. How badly the question must feel.
Amy. Not half so badly as you ought to.
Mrs. W. (pounding). Order! The dignity of the chair must be
upheld!
Rose. Then why don’t you hold it up? We’ve no objection.
Amy (rising). Mr. Speaker—
Mrs. W. The honourable member from—from—
George. Philadelphia?

[Passes Amy the chocolates

from tea-table.

Amy (sinking faintly into chair). Oh, not so bad as that!

Mrs. W. Very well—from the slough of despair—
Amy. Mr. Speaker, I rise from my slough of despair to demand,
with a tear in my eye—
Dennis. And a chocolate in your mouth—
Mrs. W. (pounds). Order!—
Amy. To vindicate myself—
George. Well, if you’re going to rise, why don’t you do it?
 Mrs. W. (crossing to tea-table, and seizing hot water pot.) I shall
pour the hot water on the next person who interrupts the honourable
gentleman.
Amy. To vindicate myself and my compeers in the—alas!—
opposition. We have remained silent under the slur of malice—we
have watched the arbitrary and—(I fear corrupt is an
unparliamentary word)—ah—questionable rulings of the presiding
officer. But, so saith the adage, “Even the worm will turn;” and why
not woman? So when we hear the distinguished and courteous
stranger, about to enter our sacred portals, maligned and sneered at
—then—then do we turn upon the “allegators” and declare, that as
soon as the shadow of his “gracious”—no—I mean “early” presence
darkens these halls of misrule, then, with one accord, for better, for
worse, we will cleave to him.
Feminine Omnes. We will.
Rose. Now, boys, you see what you have done! and, as you
remarked a moment ago, “Don’t say we didn’t warn you.”

[Bell rings.

Mrs. W. There, young people,—that is the dressing bell. Now don’t

loiter, for I shall frown on any one who is not in the drawing-room
five minutes before seven. I declare this sitting adjourned.

[All rise. Mrs. W. crosses back

and exits r. d. Rose
comes down c. and
whispers to Amy; they
laugh, put their hands
behind each other’s
waists, and skip up r.

Rose and Amy (singing). “Johnny, get your gun, get your sword,
get your pistol. Johnny, get your gun, get your gun, get your gun.”

[Exit r. d. Men all laugh

heartily.

Helen (rapping on table in imitation of Mrs. W.). Order! Order!

 George. Cash!

[Men all laugh. Helen looks

at them scornfully and
then exits r. d. Dennis
starts to follow.

George. What’s your hurry, Dennis? Lots of time.

[Sits.

Steven (reseating himself). I bless my governing star every night

that it was given to my sex to dress in the time spent by t’otherest in
doing up its back hair.
Dennis (crossing back to fireplace). Oh, yes! But as one girl said to
me, “That time isn’t worth having, for you can’t be with us!”
George. You must both have been pretty far gone, old fellow.
Dennis. Not half so badly as the girls are prospectively on “me
lud.”
Steven. No, we are in for “a bad quarter of an hour” when he shows
up.
Dennis. If he will only prove a show!
Steven (sadly). The only English swells I’ve met were very jolly,
gentlemanly fellows.
Dennis (cheerfully). All the more chance that this one turns out
the delicate little wood violet, such as we occasionally read of in the
papers as ornamenting the “Ouse of Lords.”
George (gloomily). I am afraid we shall be the flower part of this
show.
Dennis. In what respect?
George. Why, wall flowers, of course.
Steven. Really, it’s no joking matter. I don’t know how long the
girls will carry on their intended neglect, but it will be strong while it
lasts.
Dennis (coming down stage indignantly). If I have to put in two
days of life without—without—
 Steven (interrupting). Faith, hope, or charity, which?
George. Why don’t you say Amy, and have done with it?
Dennis (half turning). Very well. If I have to put in a week here,
ten miles from anything, with Amy overflowing with sweetness for
that—that—
[Hesitates.
George. Oh, speak it out, old man! The word will do you good.
Dennis. No, it wouldn’t do justice to the subject.
Steven. Well, Dennis, you needn’t think you’re the only one in this
box.
Dennis. Hope he’ll get here on a rainy night, and no carriage at the
station, as Rose suggested. Do you suppose a fiver would make our
dearly beloved Burgess misunderstand the carriage order?
George. Burgess is a living proof of the saying, that “every man has
his price.”
Steven. How do you know?
George. I found it out when he drove Mrs. Wycherly home, quite
forgetting to say that Rose and I were to be picked up at Oakridge, as
she had specially directed.
Steven (reprovingly).
“You sockin’ old fox!
You pretty white cat—
I sink dear mama
Should be told about dat.”

Dennis (sadly). It might be possible to corrupt the worthy Burgess,

but, unless we could arrange for a rainy day, I don’t see that it would
do us much good. The Anglo-Saxon doesn’t think much of ten miles.
Steven. No; and the Wycherlys would be so hurt at a guest of theirs
having such an accident that they would be doubly sweet to him.
Dennis. What day did he say he would come?
Steven. “Friday, or perhaps sooner.”
George. I suppose the “D. & T.” can’t arrange one of their
numerous accidents for that train?
 Dennis (crossly). Of course not! Whoever heard of a timely
railroad disaster?
George. Oh, for a mishap of some kind!
Steven (springing to his feet and slapping his leg). Fellows, I have
an inspiration!
George. Did you get it by inheritance, or out of a bottle?
Steven. Look here; his ludship does not arrive, probably, till
Friday. My friend, Frank Parker, is to come up here Tuesday. Let’s
make him personate the “Lord high everything else.”

George} together {Well?

Dennis} {What for?

[Both rise and come down

stage to Steven.

Steven. Why, in the first place, we shall fool the girls. That’s one
for us! In the second place, they’ll carry out their tender programme
on him, and so be tired of it when the “only genuine has our name
blown in the bottle” puts in his appearance. That’s two for us! Thirdly
and lastly, we will tell him to be a snob, so that the girls will find it
impossible to carry out their plans on him. That’s three for us!
Dennis. But will Parker dare to play such a trick in his first visit?
Wouldn’t he be like those would-be tragedians whose first and last
appearances are identical?
Steven. Oh, Mrs. Wycherly would forgive him anything, for he is
the son of an old sweetheart of hers. As for Frank, he’s up to
anything, and has lived so long in the West that his highest form of
amusement is a practical joke.
Dennis. But how are you going to fool our hostess?
George. Why, she has never seen Frank, and only heard of his
existence when Steven and I brought word of the jolly fellow we had
met in Colorado.
Steven. And, besides, he’s a winner in disguising his person and
voice. George and I coached all one day, lamenting that he had been
left behind, and there he was, sitting beside the driver all the time.
Now to the act!