Gwen stood in line for the newest roller coaster in the biggest amusement park in the

state. It was supposed to be incredible, the fastest roller coaster ever seen with drops and loops

that could shake your soul from your body. This was supposed to be an exciting moment, a

moment everyone in line was looking forward to. However, as Gwen stood in line, her legs

shaky and hands sweaty, she could feel nothing but fear and anxiety. Interestingly enough, Gwen

wasn’t nervous about the roller coaster. No, Gwen could handle anything, she told herself all the

time that this was light work and mere child’s play. She had ridden every roller coaster in the

amusement park dozens, maybe even hundreds, of times. So no, she wasn’t afraid of the roller

coaster. Instead, Gwen was absolutely terrified of the upcoming due date for her paper. It was

such a simple concept, something so easy it should have been nothing to Gwen. The topic? “Pick

an author/scholar that discusses topics we’ve gone over in class. How do you relate to them as a

writer?” Easy. Simple. Gwen could think of a billion different authors she loved. After all, who

doesn’t love reading, especially when you’re in your first year of college and anything other than

classwork is far more interesting. For most of her peers, Gwen was sure they had finished the

assignment in a day or two; but Gwen wasn’t feeling so hot about this assignment. Every time

she started, it never felt right. ‘I don’t want to use my opinion too much,’ or ‘That author might

be boring to the professor,’ ‘That author was a little controversial,’ and ‘Do they really care what

I think? It’s an academic paper,’ were all things that floated in Gwen’s head whenever she so

much as tried to get started on her work. Every time she wrote, she felt it was too personal, and

that's why she was so scared. Questions spiraled in her mind, questions of whether or not she’d

be able to finish this paper and if she’d fail the class as a result. As she was busy spacing out, she

had failed to notice the line moving ahead of her. A gentle tap on her shoulder brought back to

reality with a gasp.

 “Excuse me,” a man behind her said, “Sorry, the line is moving.” He smiled, clearly

trying to prove to her that he truly wasn’t upset that Gwen had been holding up the line for a

moment.

“Oh,” Gwen muttered, glancing between the man and widening the gap in front of her,

“Oh, right, I’m so sorry.” Gwen spoke sheepishly, the sweat in her palms growing out of

embarrassment from the interaction.

As she stepped forward, filling in the space in front of her, Gwen’s ears caught wind of a

conversation behind her.

“I just think that personal essays tie in really well with academic papers. Academic

inquiry is totally focused on discovery.”

Gwen’s eyes shifted through the people and spotted a group of five or so people behind

her. They all seemed like friends, but seemed incredibly engrossed in their conversation.

“That could be true and I see your reasoning for that, but I think you could see it more as

freewriting. You get personal in freewriting and freewriting helps you learn how to write more

fluently and easily.” One man spoke.

“Sorry, sorry,” Gwen muttered, awkwardly tapping the shoulder of the man who had

alerted her about the line moving, “Are you guys talking about writing?”

“Yeah! More so on expressivism and how it helps with writing,” the same man offering a

warm smile as he shook her hand, “My name’s Bruce Ballenger! I was just telling my friends

here that the act of writing changes for so many students when allowed to write in a personal

voice while making sense of their experiences.”

Gwen seemed stunned, finding it quite strange that her thoughts were consumed with her

latest writing assignment and there was a group of people discussing writing just behind her.
 “I’m so sorry, but are you guys writers?” Gwen asked hopefully, anxiously wondering if

she could get any form of advice from what they were saying.

“That we are, and I have to agree with Bruce,” a woman said, grinning as she then shook

hands with Gwen, “I’m Michele Zugnoni and I have to say that personal writing allows students

to gain insight into themselves both as individuals and as students. Writers ground themselves in

their individuality this way.”

“Oh, so are you guys saying it’s okay to be more personal in writing?” Gwen asked

nervously, a spark of hope igniting within her.

“It’s always okay to be personal in writing,” the man she had heard talking about

freewriting spoke up now, “I’m Peter Elbow! Our thinking doesn’t need to be formal and

impersonal or even strictly logical when we work on non personal things or academic topics.

Some essays are even better when students nudge the focus a bit more in the personal direction.”

“Really? So what if, for example, I'm writing an essay about an author’s work and how I

relate to them?” Gwen asked, rather sheepishly as she realized how silly her situation was.

“That’s what you’re worried about?” A woman asked, smiling at Gwen gently.

“I’m Anne Herrington, I think it’s quite lovely they’re having you do such a personal

essay. Failing to recognize the presence of personal experience in academic writing contributes

to dismissing its value.” Anne explained, her friends nodding in agreement as they mumbled

confirmation of their stance on the topic.

“While I think that’s all great, let’s not forget that writing all about yourself is the

hallmark of expressivism. Expressionistic rhetoric involves the placement of the self at the center

of communication. It isn’t all about you.” One man spoke, his expression rather flat as he gave

his two cents.

 “That’s James Berlin,” Michele muttered, rolling her eyes as she turned to Gwen, “While

of course it isn’t ‘all about you,’ that isn’t what expressivism is about. Self-expression in writing

is a true exploration of self and of connection to others. It builds your identity as a writer.”

“Am I allowed to have an identity as a writer though? Everything I’ve written before now

has been so academic–and I’ve always been told that I shouldn’t include first person terms or

personal ideas into my writing.” Gwen spoke shyly, still nervous as she slowly began to question

what she had learned early into her education.

“Well of course there’s always two different ways of writing,” Bruce said, “we have

exploratory writing, which is more personal, and academic writing, which includes more

research and formality.”

“More personal writing assignments really help students to develop essential skills with

writing, even allowing students like you to foster both personal and professional identities

through your writing.” Michele said, beaming with pride when she saw a look of understanding

wash over Gwen’s eyes.

“I get what you mean now,” Gwen muttered, nodding fervently, “I’ve just spent so much

time being so professional and throwing my own opinions out the window that I don’t even

know how to start an assignment that focuses so much on those opinions. I can’t even get started!

All I can think about is whether or not I’m talking about myself too much or if my professor

would even like my opinion.”

“That’s the thing. Writers should take more authority over themselves as writers by

writing more from the self, but not necessarily about the self. You can really use that for your

paper. You can discuss the ways in which you can relate from a writing standpoint. Even the way
you write your paper can be a way you connect to your author. That’s how you build your

writer’s voice.” Peter chimed in, Gwen nodding in understanding.

“My writer’s voice?” Gwen asked, clearly confused as she looked around the crowd

before her.

“Yeah, the part of your writing that blends all the different parts of your personal style.”

James said, chiming once again, “From what I’ve read, personal writing activities are a perfect

example of a writer’s unique voice. However, I think it’s also important to acknowledge that

these ‘expressionist’ ideas don’t align whatsoever with Plato’s philosophical ideas.”

Michele shook her head lightly, clearly not a huge fan of Berlin’s ideas on expressivism.

He took quick notice, seeming appalled that anyone would disagree.

“What? I mean, his entire concept of truth is about perfect form and ideas, expressionist

theories are all about subjective experience and someone’s personal interpretation. This couldn’t

be any further from the objective truth of what Plato’s theories consist of.” James spoke, his tone

sounding rather exasperated as if he had made this argument several times before.

“You can’t ignore the benefits of expressivism, though. You have to bring up the parallel

in these ideas of yours, I read it in your last paper that you forced us to peer review about six

different times!” Michele said, giving him a rather stern look.

“Okay, I’ll admit there are parallels! Both expressionist theory and Plato’s philosophy

hold the process of inquiry and dialogue to a high regard, and they both happen to look to private

experience for a form of truth. So they’re not that different, so what?” James suggested, clearly

trying to push for someone to continue arguing for expressivism.

“The ‘so what’ is the fact that language is a principle medium that allows you to interact

with yourself. In the framework of self-expression, the inquiry and dialogue is about the writer
and this helps tremendously to improve upon one’s work.” Peter suggested, grinning as he could

tell Gwen was putting the pieces together and Michele was ready for the final blow.

“Exactly, Peter. Self-reflective writing, or freewriting, allows you to explore yourself.”

This time, Michele wasn’t exactly speaking to the group but more directly towards Gwen,

“Writing with the purest intention of simply exploring your thoughts and emotions is the best

way to improve as a writer, because I’m sure Peter would agree that simply just keeping writing

is the best way to improve. You will find a purpose in your academia and from there, I think you

can one-hundred percent find your identity as a writer.”

“I one-thousand percent agree, and I’m sure you understand what we’re trying to say,

right Gwen?” Peter asked, the pride etched onto his face as Gwen nodded with a smile that didn’t

seem so nervous now.

“I do. Thank you, guys. I really appreciate it because I think I get it now. I shouldn’t be

thinking so hard about it but instead I should really just start writing, like you said.” Gwen’s

smile grew as the group around her nodded in agreement.

“I think I know exactly who I’m going to write about too, I’ll start with the freewriting

and just go from there.” Gwen said softly, finally relaxed as the writers gave her knowing smirks.

“Then I think you found yourself a great place to start,” Michele smiled, “There is no

better way to start than to open your laptop and just start writing. Write about how you relate to

that author and write about their work in a way that’s personal to you. Include your identity as a

writer. It’s your paper after all.”

“Yeah,” Gwen paused, nodding eagerly as a grin spread across her face, “Yeah, it is my

paper isn’t it?”

 The group of friends before nodded in agreement, shared looks of pride across their faces.

Gwen had gone into the amusement park filled with worry. She wasn’t even sure if she was

going to enjoy the super gnarly and awesome roller coaster when she was so worried and

anxious. As luck would have it, however, Gwen seemed to have made herself some new friends

who were more than happy to scream in joy and delight as they all rode on the roller coaster

together. Upon returning home, Gwen’s feeling of adrenaline only continued to rush as she sat at

her desk and started writing about the people she had met in the amusement park as she now

knew exactly how important her identity was to her writing.

Works Cited

Berlin, James. “College English, Vol. 44, No. 8. (Dec., 1982), Pp. 765-777.” Contemporary

Composition: The Major Pedagogical Theories, 2018,

openlab.citytech.cuny.edu/fyw/files/2018/09/BerlinMajor-Pedagogical-Theories.pdf.

Elbow, Peter. “‘Personal Writing’ and ‘Expressivism’ as Problem Terms.” Elbow.Pdf,

2014, wac.colostate.edu/docs/books/expressivism/elbow.pdf.

Herrington, Anne. “GONE FISHIN’: Rendering and the Uses of Personal Experience in

Writing.” Writing with Elbow on JSTOR, www.jstor.org/stable/j.ctt46nxbc. Accessed 7

Feb. 2024.

Michaud, Michael. “Composing a Career, from Expressivism to Essayism: A Conversation

with Bruce Ballenger.” Composition Forum, 2019,

compositionforum.com/issue/41/bruce-ballenger-interview.php.
 Zugnoni, Michele. “ProQuest | Better Research, Better Learning, Better Insights.”

Encouraging Empowerment Through Expression: Creation of a Self-Reflective Writing

Group for First-Generation College Students, 2019, www.proquest.com/.