The A person who I admired most is my grandmother.

I call her “lita” ,

a short for “abuelita”. She always supports me , no matter what other
people say said . For example, when I decided to study philosophy and
my parents were against that, she used to encourage me to follow
my desire.

Unfortunately , she was born in a society w here women woman’s

could
can not decide d what they want ed to study because they had to stay
at home. However, she has never given give up easily in her his life,
she is very determined. When she told her mother that she wanted to
study nursing nursery and she refused, my grandmother managed to
secretly practi s ce with a friend.

Anyway/Anyhow, After all she couldn't keep up with her studies

because she got pregnant of my dad. A few years later , when I was
born , and she helped with my upbringing raise me . I have never met
a more passionate person. She loves plants and she has an enormous
garden with more than one hundred plants. She also loves cooking
and she does it excellent ly! I think she has inspired me in so many
ways , but mostly I believe that I inherited heritage her
determination.

● CONTENT: quite relevant and developed.

● ORGANISATION AND COHESION: quite well organized and ideas flow quite well. Check
linking devices
● RANGE AND ACCURACY: quite good use of grammar structures and vocabulary.
However, there are some aspects that should be revised (see corrections)
● Score: 70%