readme
Zero quarters: free
Twelve quarters: $3
Carnegie Melton's leading source of neon spandex since 1895 -brought to you by the Activities Board
Drug Dealer Sells Life Story, Drugs
Clarence Barthwaite, better known as "The
Hyena" on the streets of Oakland, has decided
that his life of crime, drugs, dunking, and
womanizing is lacking in
one very important wad:
I~Ioneti~. .~.s such,
Barthwaite has decided to
sell the one thing he has
left besides his digYzity: His
store.
Going on sale this F~dav
at a large opening at some
bookstore in Oakland that
looks Like a bar or some-
thing, "~Iv Story" has gar-
nered some interesting
reviews. "Most people who
have not completed high
school would consider
using a ghost writer for an
autobiographical work.
This book shows us whtiT,"
quipped the Post-G~ztiette.
While his book was touted in "Souf Oakland giving out free crack.
Fo' Life," Barthwaite seems most compliment-
I'rrlentos Defense Saves Student from Jail Time
William Cove, an undeclared
HESS 5th ti~ear senior, was
released from custodti~ tiTester-
datiT after his law`~ers used the
"~Ientos Defense" dtu7n.g his
teal. ~~ccused of shoplifting
from Giant Eagle, Cove was
seen on store sectuYtti~ cameras
attempting to steal food.
"~~Te saw him walk over to the
meat section," said Robert
Gtuidel, manager of the
SgLurrel Hill Giant Eagle,
"mutter something to hi.s
frYend, and then stuck some
grotuzd beef in his pants."
This seemingltiT Luzcontrover-
sial who-dtuznit stoi-~; llowev
er, became much Ynore com-
plicated as the defense attor-
ne~ ifz the trial. presstued ~%1r.
GLuidle for more information.
It turned out that among
other things, Cove had mut-
www.activitiesboard.org/readme
ed by the PostG~ztiette's review "They jus' mean
I's not like the rest. THa's my store. Now tiTou
~ r
gonna bud it? I got other stuff to bud, too,
ti~'know Promise ti~ou, all
buds, no stems."
Barthwaite then shook a
plastic bag full of green
stuff at the readme
reporter, who then pre-
tended not to notice
Barthwaite and walked to
the next drug dealer.
~~ccording to the press
k.ri:~:e
release, the opening partti~
should include a whole
bunch of Duquesne girls
with big asses, and a lot of
"stuff fo' sale," according
to Hyena Inc, which is real
l~~ just Barthwaite on lv.s
cellular phone. 111 profits
Fo' shizzle will go straight to
Barthwaite, though he
promises to "give back to ma commtuvt~' bti~
tered to his friend "Hell, I'll
put THIS meat next to QTY
meat. Now I've got twice as
much meat!" However, this
was not deemed relevant to
the case.
What was relevant to the case,
However, was what i~Ir. Cove
did immediateljT after.
~~ccording to secu~t~T footage
and ~Ir. Cove's friend, after
Ahhhh. The freshmaker
packing His ~:~eat, Cove tuaxzed
around in a liarz-~~.n, ginned, while doing it."
and showed l~.is fi~.end a half-
eaten packet of ~Ientos, the ~~sked about his freedom,
Freshrnaker. Cove simpltiT expressed Happi-
ness to be free. On His tuzcon-
Jui-~F members, asked after- ventional defense, However,
wards about tHeir decision to Cove remarked, "I dunno.
free Cove and let Hite keep the Given tHis precedent, I'm
ground beef were united sa~~- goruza be slue to take a pack
ing "He to tallti~ did that of ~Ientos with me on mti~ hot
~Ientos thing. That means tiTou date with this blonde Pitt
get awati~ with, like, anti-tl~ig. cluck, if tiAou get in~T dhft."
~~id He looked reall~~ fresh
r
issue #7,000,007
oct. 22 - oct 28., Zoos
r... ~~ ..~.~.r.~.........a..~.vx....
. ._vhv~,.x.X
..Y:.......r..v.~...........
.:.¢.~ .
. ::
:. . ~,, _. ..
~,~~~~ ti
Econ Major Has Life
of failure Planed Out
"It's really quite simple," said Brenda
Blackwood. "This economics degree
will certainly get me what I'm looking
for in life -minus the women and the
monetiT." Black-wood has been taking
classes here at CI~ZLT for three dears,
and knows exactly what she has to look
forward to. "Shortlti~ after graduating,
with today's economy=, I can look for-
ward to having a great job!"
B1a.ck~T,~ood later hedged hi.s bets a bit.
"Well, asstuzung that I graduate in
tomorrow's econom~:~. Otherwise I'll
probabltiT move back in at home."
Blackwood's parents, Gregoi-~~ and
Barbara Blacls-wood, shared similar
feelings. "OH, Brett will do wonderfi~l-
lti~! .~~sstuning that she's realljT Iuckti~. But
he probable won't be. ~~emember when
he got West Nile disease two years
ago? OnljT case in the state. Talk about
tuzluckti~." Blackwood's father then
spoke some choice words about Brett's
lovelife, which readme stti-pflsinglti~ has
too much journalistic integ~.nT to pit.
"Yeah, I hope I'll find someone some-
datiT. Look at these predictions."
r
Bla.c11-wood then took out some over-
head slides with lots of dots and
graphs. "It majT not look like much of
r
an increase, but it's significant. I plot-
ted what base I got to on the tiT-axis,
and how much inonetiT I spent on the
e if ~nti~ job
boti~ on the x-axis. I
doesn't pan out, I can probablti~ find a
gujT who I won't date but might hold
hands with soinetitnes."
"OH, no, I'111 slue ever-~~tlling will turn
out all right," Blackt~-ood quipped
about her fiiture. "If social sectuit<T
stays afloat."
r
Issue 7,000,007 - readme p. 2 - October 22 -October 28

Superman Attempts Suicide, Fails Miserably How Stuff Works:

When confronted about lus strng of self-
Spoons
:~.
termination endeavotus, Superman cited :<:
issues with the wflters of his comics: "Fools
keep changin' my shit around, makin' me die
and shit. What's with those extra Supermen
they made up? rind what about my lame-ass
weakness? Why would I be weak against
something from my home planet? ...you
might wanna step back for a second " r1t
this point, Superman pushed readme out of
.:~~:;.
: ::. the way of asteam-roller. After it had rolled
:~~~~:..
'~: over l~im and left him unharmed, lze contin- :: ~: .•:s:•~s:~>::>::.:

ued: "People in this city are so stupid. I How do you get food into tiTour mouth?
mean, they honestly can't tell I'm Clark Kent? Especially that really messy sticky stuff
-~.11. I do is put on my freaking glasses! Idiots like peaches in peach juice? You use a
don't deserve to be saved all flee time. spoon, stupidhead.
OMG OWNT!!! LOL!
They've driven me INSr1NE! Sometimes I
Faster than a speeding bullet. More powerful just like to cut m~=self, see how long I can do Food goes into the mouth and should go
than a locomotive. Known for jumping in it, `til I just ... pass out!" r1t this point, no where else. Schnasangf-uger's Third
front of both. readme walked away slowly and nezvously, Law of Food is also umpoi-tant for the use
beginning to feel suicidal itself: of the spoon, you need to chew then swal-
Metropolis' local excuse for average-citizen low in that order until there is no more
idioc~T, Superman, played by Dean Cain, leas Lois Lane, Clark/Superman's long-time girl food.
grown tired of taking care of full-grown men friend, told readme that "he just snapped one
and has established arecord-high attempted day, tahzg about how stupid Metropolis is These concepts are all you really need to
suicide count. "I mean, we could and prob- and how he doesn't care about it anti~rnore. know about eating before you can grasp
able shoatic~ jail him for his suicide attempts, Oh, and he called me his ho ... but I kinda theuse of a spoon.
but I mean, c'mon... he's Superman," said liked that." She kept talkuzg, but she was the
the I~°Tetropolis Chief of Police. "Plus, we'd Lois Lane plati=ed b~~ Margot Kidder in The spoon can be composed of many dif-
leave to start 1vorl~ijag again. Crap on that." Szr~erincria Il ~;and readme likes her a lot bet- ferent elements, but the most common is
ter played by Tefl Hatcher. Pc —Plastic. Plastic spoons dominate the
largest part of the imarket in rlmeflca and
Campus Crime Alert: Suspicious Vending Machine across most the world. Other common
materials used are ~~g- Silver, Pb- Lead, Fe
~~t approximatel~~ 10:23pm on Fridati~, ones and X50 in tens. ~3t this point the vend- — Iron. While important differences do
October 10, a female sophomore in ~aICS ing machine pulled out what appeared to be exist between t11e different spoons, theti=
was assaulted and robbed bti~ a vending a cheap, plastic, Super Soaker and began are all guided by the same principles and
maclvne. This meeting took place on Forbes spraying the victim with water. Dropping the thus all work roughly the same way.
~~venue just outside of the ~Torewood park mone~T and screaming, the victim fled.
ing lot. Initially sut-pflsed by seeing a vend- Witnesses said the vending machine grabbed The two Ymain components to the spoon
ing machine drive up in a red pickup truck, the monetir, jtumped in the truck, and then are the `Handle' and the `Gluftenhower
the victim was then asked for change for a drove off iYz the direction of Squirrel Hill. bowl.' The `Handle' consists of a long nar-
$23 bill. row piece of plastic (note: can be other
The suspect is descflbed as follows: mate~.al) which is g~.pped by the hand.
The vending machine told the victim that he Some of the more advanced handles
needed change because "the Coke ima.chuze Coca-Cola Tale, 5'10"-5'1~", 200 lbs, wear- include: handgrip, "unbreakable" plastic,
in the UC won't accept no X23 bill." While ing a FUBU sweater and ~~bercrotmbie and even anti-lock brakes.
the victim searched through her purse for Fitch hat, no pants, no shoes, no service.
change, flee vending machine parked the Suspect aimed with either Super Soaker 50 The `Gluftenhower bowl' is flee bowl con-
truck and got out. The victim then notified or 100 tmodel. nected to the `Handle.' This bowl (called
the vending imachine that she only had $25 in the `Gluft`~' for short) is formed using
Gluftenhower's constant on a tfl-planar
Cane prevention tips: parabola. Each `Gluft~~' is fof-med using
~` Never approach a suspicious vendi.~ig machine alone. Make sure to bring lots of gL~zs with those exact parameters.
you even wl~.en with a friend
* Use extreme caution. when. approached by a vending machine asking for money ~-~nd there you have it, one of the world's
* If assaulted, ~e stye to either i-Luz awa~T screamii.~g, or whip out yotu Tek-9 and blast that most important utensils broken down into
mofo out of lus grind its mmost basic parts. So the next time you
~` If a vendi~ig ~nacl~ine refuses to give you your money back or your food, do~ not get violent,. eat some puddiiz' impress ti=otu date bti~
walk a~ra~, and .call flee authorities expl<~.ining how the spoon works.
Issue 7,000,007
This is the True section, where we tell you how to live your life
jinn Pays a~:
readmecmu talks to enjoigrrf
She didn't sca~rfice enough ~Q the AIM` gods
enjoigrrl: readme?
readmecmu: readme is Wight
eu.joigr~l: ~vhats~.lappen~, you riot sheep of
paper
readmecmu: c~~ll~. like a villian
readrnec~n~~~: gelln life a ~elQn
e~a.joigrrL• damn, vouf: gellin?
en,joigrrl: ~ou~vrant~ some. mellon?
readmecmu: ~-au~sellin?
r "_
. readmecmu: carer pigeons -were .far supieror
enjoigrrl~ you ca~t~ ~.fford .these.-mellans old
mom.
rcadmec~nu: old?
readmmecmu i'i~a. only 1~0$
en.joigrrl: dux~~.o.:.aline from sdme movie i .'
dc>nt remember :t:and still in cmu? wove i guess
tlzeres hope fa me a:fle~ all
readmecmu: lal
readmecmu: ghat' can uncle readme do for
you?
enjoigrrl has just- logged off :~
enjoigrrl is nowv online =}
~njoigrrl has just ;logged off. .;~
en~oigrrl is ~now online =)
enjagrrl: whoa m~.T comp is on stfike i t~~ik
readmecmu: Iol
-readme p. 4 - October 22 -October 28
enjoigrrl: i ~ all mfr b~-~11~ax~.t~ thoughts i just
typed tlefee are gone ,forever Think your neighbor is loud?
readmecmu: :'~ Toni Lti=nn Lti~can of Ridgefield,
enjaigrrl sigh Washington broke both her legs after
enjoig~rl:. ~~le aitn gods are telIng ~.ne m~ idea. stomping on the floor of her apart-
.
is sl~`t ment. Her downstairs neighbor was
enjoi~grrl: nxn then? stupid: gads.... plavin.g louch music, and she asked
~ead~ecmu:. i hate aim him to tuna it down. He replied bti~
banging on the ceil;t,g. LtiTcan then
enjoigxrl: i know ~d you could n.an~.e them jumped into the air and smashed onto
arid.:give them studded collars . the floor, breaking both legs.
enjoigrrl: o sweet- nostalgia
enjo~rrl:;and~whe the~.pist
.. ~.Tou off ~Tou:could Just Like My Family
feed.- tl3em: raw rice and. have ~~Tour o~un bird~,T Gareth Duggan of Wales supposedly
:e~ork show died from alcohol. Problem was, his
. enjaigrrl: o times liave~ chan.ged... familtiT didn't believe him. Tlzey let
readmecmu: sigh him lie by the stairs for two days
enjoigrrl: i wonder if you could gee funding before fi.g1-ring out something was
from. tlae school tc~ set up axt elaborate sti~ste~n wrong. His father and brother
of carrier pigeon fnessa thought Duggan was pla,~~ing a joke.
enjoi~r~l~ hm...
readmecmu: l~mmmm For those that loved Dunston
readmecmu: probably Checks In
readmecmu: tlie~.T funded lobster boy Travis, a chimpanzee from Stamford,
Connecticut, held up traffic for hours
after lie escaped fi:om the SUV he
was riding in. Twelve police cruisers
responded but couldn't capture the
chimp. His owners will not be
charged.
Your pet really does have it
out for you
~3 woman from Idaho was shot b~T her
dog last week. Cindy Whitaker
thought wild animals were bothe~ng
her pets so she took a pistol and went
to check on them. Her dog, Baby,
knocked her over and l~iocked the
gun out of Wlvtaker's hand. The dog
then stepped on the gLui, which fired,
shooting a bullet into `~'lutaker's leg.
I'm Guessing it Won't Work
Burlington Cotu~.t<~ officials will intro-
duce humorous speed limit signs in
an attempt to curb excessive speeding.
Example signs: "Free Speeding
Tickets ahead" and `Meet Our Judge
— Exceed ?5 inph."
Hey you
Join readme
ema~! crotella@andrew.cmu.edu
Issue 7,000,007 - readme p. 3 - October 22 -October 28

Top Lesser-Known Uncle readme's Guide to Communal Shower Etiquette

Superheroes So, you're in a dorm now, eh? And you have to shower with a whole bunch of other
people who are sometimes a bit creepy even when they're wearing clothes. And you're
thinking to yourself, "Dude, what's up with this? There's gotta be some etiquette policy
somewhere that they need to read, because that's just weird." So, to solve all of your
problems ever, Uncle readme offers this list.

For example: Saying hi to your buddy: In normal life, friendly. In a private shower, the
kind where you can hear people but you have a little curtain, usually friendly, but kinda
weird. In a communal showering area, acceptable.
..,.. ,:. ... ,. ~ ...: ...... ,.: ,::r Action Normal Life Private shower Communal
"Lady Di7nks-a-Lot"... with the power o Shower
getting knocked up in high school and an Saying Iii o yo~.~ . ei:de e
Frie~dly~:: ~, ~.c~~piable
uncanny abilitti= to bring shame to the farm b~.idd~=
h: Patting ti=oLu bud on F~endlti=! BIZr1RRE. Creep
the back
"~~Tr. Clean"... with the power of tasting Friendly...som.etimes ~ Oi~l~=~ if ya-u'r~ d.at=
~ g Ex~ceedl~gl~ gay:
really great, kids. weird i~g
Citi=in.g Odd, but OIL Goth Inconceivable
The ".~~ne~can Single"... with the power of
sta~~zg up all night eating cheese. Dropping soap Why:are you~. e`hold=~ Who c~:res? Yau will be mocked.
Coincidentally, he's unattached... relation- i~g soap~~ forever:.
ship-wise... not like, attached to things... Kissing tiTour girl
well, cheese, maybe. Fa~rlti= normal. Hot. Die. Unless you're
friend videotaping it.
1~d~usting your. 1~Iildly n~.de Wl~ate~rer. Ilse snap, and only
"loll Ground Beef Man"... with the power package ~~ d~ it once: Cots
grinding live cows into not live cows... yea,
as washing.
he's not that super. Slapping ti=our bud's Weird except in Unheard of SEP field!
butt football
"Tlie i'~Ian"... with the power to keep "Poor
Man" down.
New from the CMU Entrepreneur's Club:

;HomeAmputeeT"' Kit
The "West ~~irginia Kid"... with lightning-
fast buck-tooth strike and the awesome
power of the "illiteracti= gnp." Also able to
impregnate cousins faster than a speeding Never have to deal with
bullet. unwanted limbs again
Tlie "I ~~lwati=s Just ~~ssiuned That He Was Safe and sanitary
Gay Man"... with the power of being tough
and iligged and not at all a ladti=.
Kit includes:
butter knife and gauze
The "Pocket Protector I~i.d"... with the
power to get leis ass kicked all throughout "Finally! Home amputation thaf
elemental-~~ school. doesn't cost an arm and a leg!"

Editing & Writi~ Staff

Tough and Rugged: Chris Rotella
Ladies: Muffin, Aileen D'Esposito, Dana Vinson, Chaos, Greg Modzelewski, Brian Leahy, Brian Gray,
Ashley Holtgraver, Bhiago Berson, Esteban Bowles-Martinez, '~, Andxey Dolgov, Alison Lauer, Yuhua
Li, AB Hair Chris Smoak, Fred Merkle, Nazli Kfoury, Alisa Brown, Zachary Harris, James 'Troup, Katie
Wallat, Mike Blain, Evan Sundwick, Karthik Parasuraman, Jake Portnoff, Andrew Kline, Andrew Moore
What is readme? Well, it's fiuzntiT and it's useful. ~~nd free. So it's better than sliced bread. activities board
Who makes it? readme is panted b~T the .~~ctivities Board, sponsored bti= ti~our student activities fee
Where do I get it? readme is handed out at ~~B events and left in stacks around campus
Online: www.activitiesboard.org/readme
How do I help? Email crotella.@andrev~cmu.edu. We need fiu~ly writers, non-fiuiny w~.ters, and Photoshopers
And remember: Oniti= one person read this last week. I win, ~~ileen loses.
Issue 7,000,007
This is the True section, where we tell you how to live your life
Logic would dictate that in a CI~°TU enter-
tainment guide, I should preview the antsy;
gloomti=, coffee-house sounds of the Eels.
Or perhaps the visual and audio spectacle
that is the Blue Tan Group. Or at the veiti=
least, the again-popular post-punk sounds
of Killing Joke. lend while I'd be more than
happy= to see any of those bands in conceit,
and I'm sure they'll all put on wonderful
shows, "eff "-it. Slati=en's coming, and theti='ll
eat anti= of the other shows this week alive.
Jagermeister, that licorice-flavored demon,
leas once again put together a music tour
showcasing the heaviest acts out there.
Years past have included acts like
Drowning Pool, (lied)P.E., and other up-
and-coming metal bands. This year, theti='re
back to the basics with the ones who start-
ed it all. Slati=er effectively created thrash-
metal back in the early= eighties, and they=
still by far do it the best. Tom ~-1ra~.=a's
r ~
screaming is just as angst-madden as it was
20 ti=ears ago, I~err~T King's guitar solos have
only gotten wickeder, and oj~;n al di-Um-
mer Dave Lombardo is back on the scene.
If tiTou were disappointed in the weak
Ozzfest line-up over the sLunmer and have
been craving a show to thin ti=our insides
out, this is the one.
Without a doubt, Slab=er will plati= their clas-
sics. Slati=er will plati= their new stuff. Slayer
will play whatever the hell they want, and
it'll beat ti~ou to a pL~lp. Because it's just that
r
good. But like anyT advertisement there's
more!
r~adme tshir~ks?
give us your money
we give you cons~stantness
,~o,,,,e.<~„
~arrai~a~~e ~nfront o~ d+oherty~ ~ay~e the ~c~ itss a treasure hung
-readme p. 5 - October ?_2 -October 2~
~~:
Before ti=ou can enjoti= the beast that is
Slayer, you have to suxvive Hatebreed and
their brutal show Don't wore about mosh-
pits, though. Hatebreed isn't into that kind
of thing. I would, However, recommend
rt.~niing away from the stomp-pits as fast as
ti=ou can. Their brand of vengeance-hard-
core has been flpping audiences apart for a
while now with fist-pumping antHems like
"I Will Be Heard" and "~1 Call For Blood."
Oh, and "Final Prayer" off of last ~=ear's
Perseverence features none other than Slay=en's
Kerr= King thrashing the guitar.
l~lso on the bill are i~~lidwest hardcore act
Sworn Enemy and ELuopean black-met-
allers ~3rch Enemy= {no relation). No matter
how ti=ou look at it, this is the metal show to
see tlus year. So go. ~~nd tr= to come back
alive.
From the Desk of Student
Body Vice President
Gilbert Dussek
Through a joint effort of Student
Govemtnent and Comput;ng Services, we are
pleased to announce the launch of the new
Carnegie I~6Iellon Web Portal
(littps://mv.cmu.edu}. This message sef-ves
to give a verti= brief overview of the 2-ti=ear
project.
The vision is to establish the web portal as
the first and default poiizt of communication
between the institution and anyone with a
persistent relationship with the universitti=.
Those targeted constituencies include stu-
dents, faculty.=, staff, alunuli, and in the future,
prospective students.
The web portal integrates e-mail, personal
calendar, university= events calendar, news,
announcements, and much more. In addi-
tion, Student Information On-Line (SIO),
On-Line Registration (OLR), and Course
Info~uation On-Line (CIO) are easily= acces-
sible through the portal. Future additions
iizclude the ability= to access Campus press,
Dine~ipress and Dine~tra balances. .~s a
result of its incrediblti= customizable user
r
interface, the portal expe~ence vases greatly
from user to user, based on his/her inde-
pendent needs.
There's Ynore -lots more -but those are just
some of the highlights. The best way to
experience the portal is to visit the site,
hops: / /iuyT.cinu.edu. It is oLu hope that
evei-~=one takes fi~11 advantage of evei-~~hing
t11e portal has to offer.
If you have anti= questions or comments about
the web portal, or simply want more informa-
tion, please don't hesitate to e-mail Yne at
sbvp~c andrewcmu.edu, or feel free to stop
b~~ the Student Goverruuent Office (UC
318F}. Office Hours are Tuesdays between
Spm and 6pm.
On AFL Instant
Messenger all day?
Talk to readme while you cyber
with the 40-year-old men!
Our screen name is
readrr~ecmu
If you're funny enough, we'If
put you in readrne!
 Events and Things On and Off Campus
Wednesday, October 22
concert: The Cougars, A Week in July. Highlander
Cafe. 7pm. Free.
concert: Behemoth, Black Dahlia Murders, Six Feet
Under, Skinless (a~ Rosebud Cafe. X18-20.
Thursday, October 23
concert: The Paybacks, Gore Gore Girls @ 51st Street
Pub
concert: Rainbow Kitchen Benefit Concert
Rosebud. 7pm, ~10. 21+
concert: Vienna Teng @Club Cafe, 7:30 pm, $10, 21+
concert: From Autumn to Ashes, Every Time I Die,
Prizefighter @Club Laga, 7pm, ~12
concert: "`The Giriz Garage Tour" w/ Lennon,
Northern State, theSTART, Lillix, and Brassy @Nick's
Fat City, 8pm, ~13
Friday, Octok~er 24
concert: Insane Clown Posse, Bone Tlzugs `N
Harmony, Teclz N9ne, All That's Left @Club Laga,
7:30 pm, $55
art: Shopwerks @The Frame. Opening reception 7-
10pm
concert: Krim Waters ~~ Crawford Grill
concert: Coco Montoya @ Moondog's
concert: Neal l~ZcCoy ~~ Pepsi Cola. Roadhouse,
Burgettstown,PA, 8pm, X55-75/4 person table
concert: Matchbook Romance, Don't Look Down,
Runner Up @ VF~XI, Charleroi, PA
Saturday, October 25
concert: Marshall Crenshaw @Club Cafe, 7:30 pm,
$18, 21+
concert: Adam Evil c~ The Outside Royalty @Rex
Theatre, 8pm. $10. 21+
concert: Kim Waters ~~ Crawford Grill
concert: Aretlza Franklin ~~ Heinz Hall
concert: 90 Day Men ~t Modern Formations Gallery
concert: Savoy Brown Feat. K:i~. Simtnonds
Moondog's
concert: Jucifer ~~ IVIr=~ Smalls Fun House/Theatre
concert: Cruxslladows ~~ Upstage @Club Laga
concert: DieselboyT @ WliiskeyT Dick's
Sunday, _October 26
concert: My Chemical I-~oxnance, A Static Lullaby,
Vaux, Murder By Death @Club Laga, 7pm, ~10
concert: "Jagermeister Music Tour" w/ Slayer,
Hatebreed, Arch Enemy, Sworn Enemy @Ice Garden
Arena, Belle Vernon, PA, 7pm, X28
concert: C1lallenger, Panthers @Modern Formations
Gallery
concert: John Gorka @Rosebud, 7:50 pm, $17. 21+
concert: Black Cross @Shadow Lounge
Monday, October 27
concert: Blue Man Group -Rock Tour, Tracy Bonham,
Venus Hum ~~ A.J. Palumbo Center, 7:30 pm, X35-45
concert: Joan Baez, Josh Ritter @ Byham Tl~eatre
concert: Clumsy Lovers, Jerre Joseph and tl~.e
Jackmormons @Club Cafe, 7:50 pm, ~10, 21+
concert: Pete Yorn, Jesse Malin @Club Laga, 8pm,
X20
concert: ~ Doors Down, Seether, Shinedown @
Indiana University.; Indiana, PA
concert: Cher, Tommy Drake @Petersen Events
Center, 7:30 pm, X55.50-78.50
concert: Hey Mercedes @Upstage ~~ Club Laga, 7pm
Tuesday, October 28
concert: Eels and MC Honky ~~ Rosebud Cafe. 8pm.
X14-18
concert: Death Cab For Cube, Mates of State ~~ Club
Laga, 7pm, 12
concert: DJ Vadim @Rex Theatre
concert: Eels, MC Honk~--yT @Rosebud, 8pm, ~1~
Wednesday, October 29
movie: True Romance. McConomyT. 10, 12pm. $1
concert: Widespread Panic, Particle @ A.J. Palumbo
Center, 7:30 pm, X30
concert: I~illirig Joke, Amen @Club Laga, 8pm, ~15
concert:.._ Disco D @Memphis Lounge
concert: Puddle Of Mudd @Rock Jungle
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