Title: The Invisible Harm of Downplaying a Romantic Partner’s Aggression

Authors: Ximena B. Arriaga1, Nicole M. Capezza, Wind Goodfriend, and Katherine E. Allsop

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 Title: The Invisible Harm of Downplaying a Romantic Partner’s Aggression

The article “The Invisible Harm of Downplaying a Romantic Partner’s Aggression” by

Arriaga et al. delivers on a sensitive topic that quite a several people can relate to. Specific

instances of harm tend to be visible, and people can see the dents and scars that have been

afflicted. However, Arriaga et al. deliver on the idea of the harm that does not leave any physical

harm or scars but scars the victim’s heart, mind, and soul. Instances of bullying, insults,

belittlement, and other verbal or emotional abuses happen to inflict damage and harm that is

never visible to the naked eye. Some individuals are part of conflicts for the sole purpose of

inflicting harm or making a victim out of their partner. Theirs is to leave invisible scars that take

away their partner's happiness, joy, and peace. However, as Arriaga et al. happen to note, when a

partner happens to be motivated to continue a relationship, they will not relate their misery to the

aggression they happen to face at the hands of their partner. But why does a victim choose to

stay with a toxic person who continually victimizes them? The first answer is the commitment to

a relationship. The second entails the perception that being in a relationship is better than being

out of it. The third reason is that when a person is committed to a relationship, they will find

reasons to justify their choice to stay. However, the downside of downplaying the effects of an

antagonistic relationship is that it distorts someone's judgment of aggressive behavior. Also, it

takes away one's happiness and leaves one distressed even though they may want to deny it.

The article is an eye-opener into the adverse effects of aggression in romantic

relationships. One would expect that a partner would terminate a connection the moment a

partner becomes aggressive. However, the article allows us to see why someone would choose to

stick to an abusive relationship. I have learned that although nonphysical forms of aggression are
common in society, their harm is not widely recognized. As a result, this type of aggression tends

to be downplayed as less harmful, when in the real sense is harming the victims. The researchers

raise an interesting point where they point out how committed individuals are broken, yet they do

not recognize it, making the harm invisible. The article is a wake-up call to committed partners

to avoid being taken advantage of.