Interpersonal

Attraction and
Close Relationships
√ MARITAL HAPPINESS

PREPARED BY :- SHAZIDA PERVEEN

ROLL NO. - 2019/BPY/02
SEMESTER- 4TH
DEPARTMENT OF PSYCHOLOGY
ASSAM WOMEN’S UNIVERSITY, JORHAT, ASSAM
 MARRIAGE :-
INTRODUCTION
Marriage is when two people decide to take vows to
spend the rest of their lives together. It is a social and
legal contract between two individuals that unites
their lives legally, economically, and emotionally.

According to Psychology dictionary, Marriage is also

called matrimony or wedlock. Marriage is clearly one
of the most important events in most people's lives ;
that's one reason, why it is often celebrated with
lavish parties.
 MARITAL HAPPINESS:
Marital happiness is a judgment made by a spouse that indicates the
sense of well being or satisfaction he or she experiences in the
marital relationship.
Marital happiness Is far more important than anything else in
determining personal well-being
FACTORS AFFECTING MARITAL
HAPPINESS:
• Financial Problems , Family-related problems and issues
relating to children.
• Age of Marriage , Family Conflict , understanding problems.
• Communication , Mixed Up priorities , Emotional Infidelity ,
In – Laws
• Infidelity in marriage
• Parenting Disagreements etc.
But aside from such problems , research findings indicate that
there are several factors present even before the wedding
that are useful in predicting whether , and to what extent ,
marriages will succeed or fail.
1. SIMILARITY AND ASSUMED SIMILARITY:
√ Similarity :- the tendency for two individuals to be like each other
at one moment in time.
• Similarity between potential spouses is an important predictir of
marital happiness.
• Married People are similar to eachother and their similarity remains
stable over time.
• Similar People Marry , and similarity neither increases nor decreases
as time passes.
• Happy couples show more actual similarity
√ Assumed similarity:- the tendency to assume that another person
is similar to oneself.
• Happily married couples believe they are more similar to each other
than they actually are
• Spouses have a high degree of assumed similarity , which is
similarity that doesn’t
• Assumed similarity appear to contribute to marital satisfaction.
2. DISPOSITIONAL FACTORS :
• some individuals are better able to maintain a positive relationship
than others, and they are better bets as marriage partners than
others.
For example :- Narcissim
• Interpersonal behavior and attachment styles.
• Anxiety , Negativity and Neuroticism are associated with later
relationship problems.
WHY RELATIONSHIPS FAIL— AND
WHY, SOMETIMES, THEY SUCCEED.
• "Happily ever after" and "Till death do us
part“, Expressions losing their meaning due to
increasing divorce rates.
• Most people enter marriage with high hopes
and positive views of their partners ; yet more
and more marriages these days end in divorce.
• Unmarried respondants estimate for
themselves only a 10 percent chance of a
divorce when they marry(Fowers, Lyons, Montel
, & Shaked, 2001).
MAJOR CAUSES OF FAILED
MARRIAGE:
1. Cost and Benefits of Marital Interactions (Clark and Grote ,
1998) :-
• To engage in intentionally positive acts and to avoid intentionally
negative acts.
• Some individuals actually work to obtain negative , threatening
information.
• Maximizing benefits and minimizing costs.
 2. Problems Between Spouses:-

• No spouse is perfect.If both fails to understand each other it may create problem.
• Negative Qualities and positive one.
• For example:- Disappointing discovery that the actual similarity between spouses is
less than the assumed similarity(sillars et Al. 1994)
• Some Marital problems are universal and probably unavoidable.
• The list of decisions—and compromises—is endless.
• Most married couples report that they have disagreements and most indicate that
serious conflicts arise once a month or more often(McGonale, Kessler, &
Schilling,1992)
3. Perceiving Love—or at least Approval — as contingent on success:-

• partner's love and approval is linked to external success.

Example – jobs ,or at school, achievements in their careers
• Expectations—Partners will be kind and loving , express approval of them, only
when they are successful.
• Such perceptions likely to develop among people low in self-esteem.
• The marital impacts of low self-esteem are many, including fear or lack of
physical intimacy, not living up to your marriage potential, and not allowing
someone to love and accept both positive and negative parts of you.
 4. External Pressures: The effects of being in a Marginalized Relationship

• Marginalized relationship means a nontraditional , romantic

involvements. Where couples experience social disapproval.
• Different ethinic groups , Same gender , Age difference—Victims of
Prejuices.
• People in marginalized relationships did report lower investments
but showed satisfaction equal to that of people in nonmarginalized
relationships.
• Marginalized relationships Expressed greater commitment than
nonmarginalized relationships.
• "Romeo and Juliet" effect [ coined by Driscoll, Davis, and Lipetz
(1972) ]- the tendency of relationship partners, usually adolescents, to
feel greater affection for their partners when they perceive others
(e.g., parents) to be interfering with the relationship.
 FACTORS THAT CONTRIBUTE TO A
SUCCESSFUL MARRIAGE :
• Love :Example - Give and take in love. You give to the relationship
unconditionally without expecting something back from your partner.
• Commitment : Example - Work as a team and compromise
• Trust: Example- Not controlling or monitoring each other.
• Time : Example- activities that let you keep engaging with each other, such
as playing tennis together
• Attention: Example – Making their favorite food To show you care.
THE CONSEQUENCES OF A FAILED
RELATIONSHIP:-
• Spouses find the end of their relationship more difficult than the
end of a friendship
• effects on the partners, often leading to great sadness, worry, a high
level of tension, anxiety, and depression.
• Unhealthy marriages characterized by substantial parental conflict
pose a clear risk for child well-being.
• Secure attachment style work actively to save a relationship.
Insecure attachment styles are more likely to end a relationship.
• Active Responses -Ending the relationship as quickly as
possibleExample- moving out, filling for divorce etc.Or working to
improve it .Example- Have a Talk , seeing a marriage counselor.
• Most divorced individuals marry again, especially men.
• "Remarriage represents the triumph of hope over experience" -
Samuel Johnson.
CONCLUSION :
Marriage is often termed as the “sacred bond.” Many people even believe that a couple is meant to
be together in this world and hereafter. Yet, sometimes we see marriages with broken, twisted,
and unexpected ends. One of the worst scenarios of all is when one of the partners stops trying in
a relationship and is at the brink of leaving. Fixing broken pieces of your marriage is no easy task,
but following a series of steps can help the situation and make it better over time.
For Example :-
• Find time to negotiate
• Give each other some space
• Don’t drag older issues
• Whatever reason for contending lies in your relationship, be ready to accept it.
• Seek professional help