Anna McManus 2022

UNDERCOVER COP

(OPEN ON: POLICE DEPARTMENT OFFICE,

GROUP OF OFFICERS SEATED INCLUDING A

CHIEF, WITH AN OFFICER PRESENTING IN

FRONT WITH SCREEN)

(OFFICER 1 IS STARTING TO SIT AS THE

OTHERS APPLAUD)

CHIEF:

Good work this week Monroe, that

grandma licker won’t be out there

much longer. Who’s next?

DANIELS:

That’d be me chief.

(DANIELS APPROACHES THE SCREEN)

As you know, students at Romanwood

High School are having sexual

intercourse in restrooms in

concurrence with a Tiktok trend. So

I went undercover as senior William

NotCop to get to the bottom of it.

(PICTURE OF HIM POORLY DISGUISED

APPEARS)

Apparently, 10th grader Eliza

Willis began the trend with her

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best friend's boyfriend, Mark

Lennon. If you ask me, Eliza was

totally in the wrong, even if she

and Mark—

CHIEF:

Keep it moving Daniels!

DANIELS:

Yes, sorry chief. Since the first

incident, there have been various

offenses, and it’s not just in

restrooms. Kids are doing it in the

Home Ec room, the bleachers of the

gym, and through the fence outside.

(PICTURES OF EACH LOCATION ON SCREEN)

OFFICER JONES:

Ouch.

DANIELS:

We talked about it in Econ class

and I found out that Jessica

Johnson was interested in

participating in the trend, so

after class, I stopped her in the

hall to talk.
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(PAN TO OTHER OFFICERS, ALL

CONFUSED/CONCERNED)

(PICTURE OF YOUNG GIRL ON SCREEN)

She said she liked my quote ‘weird

vibe.’ I asked her if she had had

sex in the bathroom yet and she

said no, but she wants to. So

during passing time, Johnson and I

went to the third floor because we

were less likely to get caught up

there and–

CHIEF:

Daniels! Do not tell me you had sex

with a 15 year old.

DANIELS:

Of course not (SMILES)

(EVERYONE SIGHS, RELIEVED)

DANIELS:

We made love.

OFFICER 1:

Oh god!

Officer 2:

That’s disgusting!

Officer 3:
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Oh my God!

(SOME OFFICERS BEGIN TO STAND AND WALK

TOWARDS DANIELS WITH HANDCUFFS)

CHIEF:

Wait guys, wait!

(OFFICERS BACK OFF)

CHIEF:

Officer Daniels, you mean to tell

me that you had sex–

(DANIELS POINTS AND SMILES)

CHIEF:

–Made love to a 10th grader?

DANIELS:

She was in 11th grade but it’s

whatever (MUMBLING)

Chief:

Oh dear God Daniels, you sick son

of a bitch!

(CHAOS, OTHER OFFICERS YELLING)

DANIELS:

And on the next slide, photo

evidence!

OFFICERS:

NO!
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CHIEF:

Tell us Daniels, what happened

after you…made love?

DANIELS:

Made love yeah (SMILING). Well you

can imagine her surprise when I

told her she was under arrest

(LAUGHS). So I zipped up,

handcuffed her, and I believe she’s

waiting in the hall–

(YOUNG GIRL WALKS ON, HANDCUFFED,

CRYING)

JESSICA:

I’m sorry Daddy!

(PAN TO VERY ANGRY OFFICER, NAME TAG

SAYS JOHNSON)

DANIELS:

Ohhh! Daddy!

(GESTURING TO OFFICER JOHNSON)

I thought you were talking to me!

(LAUGHS)

(OFFICER JOHNSON CHARGES HIM, END)