SELF-ESTEEM

• DEFINE SELF ESTEEM:

“Self-esteem is the ability to feel good about oneself inside,

regardless of life events or messages being received from
others.”

SELF-ESTEEM THEORY

• WHAT IS SELF ESTEEM:

“Self Esteem is the bridge between who you are and what you
do. It allows a person to feel secure and confident. It helps us
to communicate with confidence and bounce back from
difficulties experienced in life.”
• SELF ESTEEM IS YOUR SELF IMAGE OR HOW YOU
FEEL ABOUT YOURSELF:

“Your Self Esteem is made up of thoughts and feelings you have

about yourself. These may be positive. Example: “I am smart. I
learn from my mistakes. I’m fine.” OR Negative. Example:
“I’m ugly. I’m stupid. I’m afraid to fail. I am boring.”

• POSITVE SELF ESTEEM MEANS:

Accepting yourself totally and unconditionally, fully realizing

you have strengths and weaknesses, good points and bad, +ve
and -ve qualities. The more +ve feelings you have about
yourself, the higher your self-esteem. The more -ve feelings you
have about yourself, the lower your self-esteem.

• WHY SHOULD I THINK ABOUT MY SELF-ESTEEM:

Because self-esteem affects the way you live

 How you think.........

 How you speak speak............

 How you act ..........................

 And How you feel about yourself and

others.................................

 How successful you are in achieving your goals in life.

 HIGH SELF ESTEEM MAKES YOU FEEL:

 EFFECTIVE, PRODUCTIVE, CAPABLE AND LOVING

• A person with High Self Esteem will learn what is important in

life and will not get distracted by feelings of guilt, fear or self-
doubt. With High Self Esteem a person can make choices
without compromising values or ethics and take responsibility
for his or her actions.

IMPORTANCE OF HIGH SELF-ESTEEM

• FEELING GOOD ABOUT YOU ENABLES YOU:

1. TO ACCEPT CHALLENGES:

When you have high Self Esteem, you’re not afraid to develop
your abilities. You’re willing to risk trying new things. If you
don’t try, you can’t grow.

2. TO ENRICH YOUR LIFE:

Happy people are a joy to be around. By being happier with

yourself, you’ll be eager to meet new friends.
By being more comfortable and open about yourself, you’ll
develop closer relationship.

3. TO MAINTAIN SELF CONFIDENCE:

Believing you can do something is winning half the battle.

It allows you to involve yourself completely with whatever
you’re doing. Whole hearted effort helps to bring improvement
to performance.
 4. REMAIN FLEXIBLE:

Change isn’t easy. It is unfamiliar and frightening at times.

However, a positive self-image makes it easier to accept new
ideas and ways of doing things.

• With high esteem you can

 Be the person you want to be.................

 Enjoy others more fully..................
 Offer more of yourself to the world

SELF-ESTEEM THEORY

• LOW SELF ESTEEM:

Can make you feel: ineffective, worthless, incompetent and

unloved

People with Low Esteem have a negative perception of

themselves physically, mentally or emotionally compared to
others.

SOME COMMON EFFECTS OF LOW ESTEEM

A VICIOUS CIRCLE
A VICIOUS CIRCLE

(a) Lack of Self Confidence: People with low self-esteem

often have little confidence in their abilities. They may think
they’re doomed to fall again because they failed before.

(b) Poor performance: Lack of self-confidence may result in

making little or no effort toward realizing projects or goals. But
failures that result from a lack of effort are not a true reflection
of a person’s abilities

Just because a man lacks the use of his eyes doesn't mean he
lacks vision.
-Stevie Wonder

(c) Distorted view of self and others: Some people won’t give
themselves credit for their accomplishments. These people may
think others look better in comparisons. They may also believe
that things just happen to them - that they don’t make them
happen

(d) Unhappy Personal life: Hard to develop personal

relationship. ... lonesome.... unhappy...dejection.... depression
 How do you
Break the
- From Vicious to Victorious Cycle
- TAKE POSITIVE STEPS TO RAISE YOUR SELF
ESTEEM.
STEPS TO RAISE SELF-ESTEEM
1) TAKE RESPONSIBILITY:
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”
– Eleanor Roosevelt
2) APPROPRIATE TREATMENT OF AN EVENT OR A
MESSAGE
A+B=C
where
A = Activating Event;
B = Belief about the event and
C = Consequence/Outcome
3) REDEFINE YOUR BELIEF SYSTEM:
Believe in yourself. Have faith in your abilities. Without self-
confidence you cannot manifest the best in you. Self-confidence
leads to self-realization and successful achievement.
 “If you don’t change your beliefs, your life will be like this
forever. Is that good news?”
- Robert Anthony
“They conquer who believe they can”. – Emerson
4) Make a list of all that you have good
 Body posture:
Good Postures: Sitting/Standing erect; Keeping the palms
together while talking; Keeping hands on the lap in a confident
way; keeping a smile
Not good: Hitting head; standing in a drooping way; Keeping
hands on the cheeks; Standing and keeping hands on the hips;
kneading hands
5) Two ways to cure inferiority complex.
 The first is a complex, time consuming process.
 The second one is to instantaneously infuse confidence.
That is to repeat power thoughts, power words and power
actions.
“I can do all things through God who dwells in me
and strengthens me day after day, every day, and all the days of
my life."
“Day by Day, Every Day, in Every Way Better and Better”
6) Keep smiling; tell jokes; laugh; read humor; listen to jokes; tell
things in lighter vein; take things in lighter vein;
 Twelve Steps to improve
Self Esteem
i. Visualize a success picture
ii. Whenever a negative thought occurs, replace with a
positive thought
iii. Do physical exercise
iv. Do not be over awed by 'great people'
v. Accept compliments gracefully
vi. Pass on Credit to others
vii. Seek a good counselor
viii. Make a list of your abilities and increase that by 10%.
Review monthly.
ix. Accept people as they are. (More you accept others…)
x. Repeat several times: "Day by day, every day, in every
way, better and better."
xi. Before going to bed, review, reaffirm & restore
xii. Use "As if" technique
 SELF-ESTEEM respects Others' Esteem
I am a Person
You are a Person
Without you, I am not a person
For only through you is language made possible
And only through thought is humanness made
possible
You have made me important.
Therefore, I am important and you are important;
If I devalue you, I devalue myself.
(Thomas A Harris: “I am ok you are ok”)