Writing Entry 2

A Proposal Report
Writing: Characteristics of a proposal report: Paragraphs & headings, style & register
Useful Language: persuasion, suggestion, comparison & contrast, beginning &
ending a proposal report
Writing Task:A proposal for the location of a company’s new coffee area

Style and Register

1. Look at the task below.

You must answer this question. Write your answer in 300 – 350 words in an
appropriate style.
You work for a large company. The extract below comes from a memo which was
circulated by one of the managers. The Human Resources Director has now asked staff
representatives to submit a written proposal, suggesting ways to deal with the
problems outlined in the extract and justifying any expenditure involved.

In common with most of the population, our staff tend to lead extremely
unhealthy lifestyles. Far too many exist on a diet of burgers, chips and pizzas or
similar fast foods. Few people exercise as they should, with the majority
spending their free time in sedentary activities such as watching television or
playing computer games. Obesity is a widespread problem and there is an
increased incidence of heart disease. We need to take urgent steps as a company
to encourage our workforce to become fitter and healthier.

Write your proposal.

Answer the questions:

1. Who do you work for? What special role do you have among the staff?
………………………………………………………………………………………………
2. Where does the extract come from? Who wrote it?
………………………………………………………………………………………………
3. Who has asked you to write this proposal?
a) a colleague b) your employer c) a person who has a high position
4. Should your language be
a) formal? b) informal?
5. For what purpose are you writing the proposal? To recommend something?
To explain the reason for a state of affairs? To oppose something? For some
other reason?
………………………………………………………………………………………………
6. Which two major areas have you been asked to cover in your proposal?
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2. Imagine you are an examiner. Read the two proposals, A and B, below. Look at
whether the style and register are appropriate
PROPOSAL A PROPOSAL B
PROPOSAL TO PROMOTE BETTER HEALTH IN
THE WORKFORCE
Introduction
Dear Sir or Madam,
The aim of this proposal is to suggest practical ways to
Here is my proposal. I believe it will encourage the company’s workforce to become fitter and
help us to make our staff fitter and healthier.
healthier.
Diet
A major problem is that some of our
1. Health Education
staff do not have a clue about the
A number of our staff appear to be unaware of the
importance of diet. We must run our
consequences of eating fried fatty food. I recommend that
own health scheme. If people realize
we run our own health campaign, with posters and
that fatty foods are bad for them, they
leaflets, to encourage people to eat a healthier diet.
will stop eating them. I reckon we
should run a campaign. We can make 2. Practical steps
posters and leaflets and show people In the meantime, we should take some practical steps.
how their health will improve if they Many members of staff are in the habit of working
eat more vegetables and fruit. Why not through their lunchtime. It is common practice for them
get staff to take a proper break instead to order a burger or pizza, which they eat at their desks. I
of having working lunches all the time? propose that we encourage staff to take a proper break
That way, they wouldn’t eat so much and go to the staff restaurant where healthier foods such
fast food. as salads would be included on the menu.
Most of our staff know they should Exercise
exercise more. They know all about the
1. The current situation
dangers of obesity and heart problems.
When questioned, most workers said they were aware of
The problem is they have to commute
the health benefits of exercising and the dangers of
long distances to work, so they don’t
obesity. However, it is a fact that some of our staff
have time to go to a gym or to exercise
commute considerable distances in order to get to work,
classes when they get home.
which means that they have limited leisure time in the
What about setting up a gym here at evening. If we were to offer exercise facilities at work, it
work? Then they could exercise here appears that a substantial number of people would be
before and after work and it will save ready to take advantage of these.
them going out again when they get
2. Practical steps
home.
I suggest we set up a staff gymnasium with showers and a
It will cost the company money in the coffee bar, which people could use either before or after
beginning because we will have to work during the lunch period. Staff would then have the
build the gym and get equipment, but opportunity to exercise on the premises without
we will get the money back in the end inconvenience or expense. We should also run after-work
because everyone will be fitter. classes in aerobics and step dancing and set up a football
club to encourage those who would not normally use a
I hope you will find my proposal
gym.
helpful.
Expenditure
I feel strongly that the long-term benefits to our company
would very quickly offset the expenditure involved. Fewer
days would be lost to sickness and the work capacity and
general morale of the staff would be much higher.
Conclusion
I believe that my proposal is the best way to create a
healthier and fitter workforce, and I hope my proposal
will be given due consideration.

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When you write a proposal you‟re trying to persuade readers to follow a course of
action. Your readers may be a boss or teacher (in which case you will need quite a
formal style), or colleagues or members of your club (in which case the style will be a
little less formal – you can address your readers more personally, perhaps use
contractions). In both cases the format should be the same. You‟ll have to make a
suggestion or suggestions based on some factual information.

3. Read the box above and look back at proposal B on page 2. Work with a partner and
list as many characteristics of a proposal report as you can think of. Then compare
your ideas with those of other students in the class. Add any other ideas to your list.

Paragraphs and Headings

4. Joanne is head of her company‟s social committee. She asked staff what they
want as part of group membership to a new gym. Read her notes. Which point is
not essential? Why?

Look at the proposal Joanne wrote based on the notes. Suggest an overall title.
Then suggest headings for each paragraph.

(1) …………………………………………………………………………………
(2) …………………………………………………………………………………
The social committee has investigated the possibility of taking advantage of reduced-rate group
memberships at two local gyms, encouraging employees to get regular exercise. This proposal looks
at the differences between two local gyms: To-the-Max and Work Out.
(3) …………………………………………………………………………………
Both gyms are large and well-equipped. Work Out is the larger of the two gyms and includes a 25-
metre pool together with a sauna and spa area. To-the-Max, on the other hand, separates its cardio
gym from the weight-training area, which would be more pleasant for those wanting to do only
cardio exercise. Although it does not have a sauna or spa, its locker and shower facilities have only
just been renovated and are spacious and attractive. Finally, a key difference is that To-the-Max has
its own car park with over 200 spaces. In contrast, Work Out does not provide a car park, but there
is usually free parking in the streets surrounding the gym.
(4) …………………………………………………………………………………
Only two staff members indicated they would like a sauna, while a large number of staff indicated
that they are very interested in attending group fitness classes. Both gyms have a good range of
these. However, not only does To-the-Max have a more varied programme, it also has more group
fitness studios.
(5) …………………………………………………………………………………
To-the-Max is the most expensive, costing £20 per person per month, while Work Out costs £15.
However, the two gyms differ in terms of membership schemes. To-the-Max has the benefit of
offering a more flexible membership scheme because employees can opt out at any stage after the
first month, whereas Work Out requires a minimum of six-month membership before it is possible
to opt out. A further point in relation to cost is that staff would appreciate a financial contribution
from the company for whose take up a fitness programme.
(6) …………………………………………………………………………………
Although To-the-Max is not quite as large and as well equipped as Work Out, it is thought to be the
most suitable gym for our employees. To-the-Max is more expensive, but a company subsidy will
help offset the cost. Furthermore, the possibility of being able to cancel membership after one
month offers greater flexibility. I recommend that we take out a group membership with To-the-
Max.

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5. A. In any kind of writing it is important to structure your paragraphs well. Work

with a partner and discuss these questions about paragraphing. Then compare your
answers with those of other students in the class.
1. How do you make it clear where one paragraph ends and the next begins?
2. How many sentences would you expect to have in most paragraphs? (You will, of
course, find lots of exceptions.)
3. In a writing task of about 250 words, how many paragraphs would you expect
to write?
4. What is the topic sentence of a paragraph?
5. What is the most usual place to find the topic sentence?

A. Look at the proposal in activity 4 and check whether the paragraphs in the
proposal illustrate your answers to the questions in activity 5.

Useful Language
Comparison and Contrast
6. Sometimes you need to compare and contrast information in a proposal.
A. Look at these sentences. Choose the phrases used in the proposal on page 3.
 To-the-Max, (1) although/ on the other hand, separates its cardio gym from
its weight-training area.
 This proposal looks at the (2) differences about/ differences between two local
gyms.
 (3) Although/ However it does not have a sauna or spa, its locker and shower
facilities have just been renovated.
 A (4) key difference/ total difference is that To-the-Max has its own car park.
 (5) Although/ In contrast, Work Out does not provide a car park, (6) but/ however
there is usually free parking in the streets.
 Work Out is (7) larger/ the larger of the two gyms.
 (8) However/ But, not only does To-the-Max have a (9) more/ most
varied programme, it also has more group fitness studios.
 The two gyms (10) differ in/ differ about terms of membership schemes.
 Only two staff members indicated they would like a sauna, (11) while/ on
the other hand a larger number signalled an interest in a range of fitness
classes.
B. Match the correct words/ phrases in A to descriptions a) – g).
a) a verb used to compare two things ...........
b) nouns used to compare two things ..........., ...........
c) a noun phrase that includes a zero or indefinite article and a comparative adjective
...........
d) a noun phrase that includes definite article and a comparative adjective ...........
e) adverbial linkers of contrast ..........., ..........., ...........
f) conjunctions showing concession ..........., ...........
g) a conjunction of contrast ...........

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7. Fill in each gap with a correct word/ phrase from 6A. There is sometimes more than
one possible answer.
a. The..........................................between the two fitness programmes is that I use the
rowing machine more.
b. You should aim to increase your heart rate......................................., if you start to feel
faint or dizzy, please stop immediately.
c. Frank did a cardio workout,........................................Scott did weight training.
d. The two personal trainers......................................terms of their approach to fitness.
e.they had an easy workout, they still feel tired afterwards.
f. I think my gym offers........................................interesting range of classes than others.
g. I go the gym about twice a week. Suzanne,..................................., goes every weekday.
h. I don‟t really like the fitness classes,.........................I enjoy cardio training on my own.
i. The 6 p.m. class is definitely.....................................crowded of the two evening fitness
classes.
j.I often don‟t feel like going, once I get to the gym I usually
enjoy the workout.

Suggestion & Recommendation

8. Look back at the samples on pages 2 and 3. Note down phrases used to introduce a
suggestions and recommendations.
e.g. I would suggest...
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Beginning and Ending a Proposal Report

9. Look back at the samples on pages 2 and 3. Note down useful phrases used to
begin and end a proposal report.
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Writing Practice
You have been asked to write a proposal for the location of a company‟s new coffee area. There
are two options: an unused storeroom or an unused office. Read the notes for the proposal. Decide
which location you think would be best. Write a proposal in 220 – 260 words in an appropriate
style.
storeroomoffice
convenient situated for all staff✓ spacious – lots of natural light
already has running water✓ room for seating – but need to buy tables and chairs
cheap to renovate✘ not conveniently situated – it’s near the manager’s
✘ small – hardly any room foroffice
seating✘ no running water
✘ no windows✘ expensive to renovate

1. Read the question carefully and underline all the points you must cover.
2. Think about register and style.
3. Make a plan. Decide how to divide the information into key sections, and think of a
heading for each section.
4. Think about your introduction and conclusion.
5. Make specific suggestions and recommendations, using useful language you
learned in the lesson.
6. Read and check for mistakes.

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