1

My Life Story: A Personal Narrative

Steve Harris

Arizona State University

OGL482: Pro Seminar II

Dr. Jules (Jay) Klagge, Ph.D.

September 1, 2023
 2

My Life Story: A Personal Narrative

Helen Keller once said, “A bend in the road is not the end of the road…unless you fail to

make the turn.” In my life, there have been bends on the road, some of which were not on the

map. However, instead of slamming on the brakes, I have stayed behind the wheel, navigating

where the road takes me, even if it was unpleasant at the time. Smooth, straight roads do not test

a person’s character or create opportunities for personal growth; bumpy, curvy roads do.

The following collection of stories will represent how I became the person I am today.

Each story, woven together, will create a narrative that unfolds over time. They will reveal

someone who has experienced peaks and valleys in life. They will showcase adversity but

resiliency, heartbreak but perseverance, loss but a new life, and failure but achievement, to name

a few. These are all elements that represent the different threads that make up the tapestry of my

own life. They have molded and shaped me into who I am today.

The Early Years

As someone now in his 40s, I have developed into someone who has a clear sense of

identity, purpose, confidence, responsibility, and an understanding of where I fit into society. But

I wasn’t born with all of this; it was developed over time and through many events that have

influenced many aspects of who I am today. That said, my early childhood years played an

instrumental role in starting me on the right trajectory for personal and developmental growth.

On November 30th, 1973. I was born in Medford, Oregon, and my parents and I resided

there until they decided to move up to Salem, Oregon, in 1978. I was an only child. My

formative childhood years were filled with love, laughter, and plenty of great memories. We were
 3

a close-knit family unit. Although I knew no difference then, I had a “model” childhood. I grew

up in a nurturing, stable, and secure environment. I lived in the same house, stayed in the same

school district, and mostly had the same friends until high school, when a few moved away.

I grew up in a middle-class neighborhood. While we were not wealthy, I was not

“without” either. My dad was the sole provider for our household. When we moved to Salem, it

was so he could pursue a career in real estate. But after a few months, he grew tired of working

all the nights and weekends required to show homes to prospective buyers. It meant being away

from our family more than he wanted. In response, he revolved out of real estate and went into

the insurance business, where he made a living for over twenty years. It wasn’t until much later

in life that I even knew the backstory behind my dad’s transition from real estate to insurance

sales, and this was by design; my parents wanted me to focus on being a kid and nothing else.

They protected me from anything concerning, such as my dad’s employment. I had the space to

grow up in an environment where my “concerns” were when the next Star Wars action figure

was being released, not whether I would have food on the table.

My parents instilled many fundamental values and life principles from an early age. They

introduced me to Christianity, even though I was too young to understand what having a

relationship with Jesus meant until I was much older. They taught me the value of money, how to

communicate respectfully with others (e.g., manners, etiquette, etc.), the importance of having

good social skills, respecting others and their property, and so on. Starting around 5th grade, I had

a weekly allowance, but I had to complete my chores before I received it. I would also

occasionally mow our neighbor’s lawn if I wanted to earn extra money. This was my first

introduction to “work ethic” and how I could earn a reward as a return on my time investment.
 4

Both of my parents were very involved in my extracurricular activities during childhood.

I played numerous individual and team sports and discovered I had a competitive drive. At least

one or both attended all my sporting events during my elementary and middle school years. My

mother was a scorekeeper for my little league baseball team for multiple seasons. She was

behind the backstop, rain or shine. My dad was an active leader in the local chapter of the Cub

Scouts, which I was a part of during elementary school. Again, they modeled what I wanted to

provide later in my life when I started my own family. Their commitment to involvement in all

aspects of my life would represent safety, comfort, and predictability vital to a child developing

his identity and a sense of self-worth.

I was also fortunate to have a stay-at-home mom. Since my dad worked during the day,

she was the one who usually made my lunches and got me off to school most days, and she

would pick me up from school or was home when I arrived. This was a rather typical routine

during my elementary and middle school years. As a result, I spent considerable time with my

mom, and we had a strong bond and relationship (and we still do today). I felt safe expressing

my feelings to her and could seek guidance if I faced any challenges. Not only did I benefit

developmentally from the stability and predictability of this environment, but it served as a

model family structure that I wanted to replicate for my future wife and family one day.

The early years of my life were vital to my development. I was immersed in a nurturing

environment where I experienced unwavering support, love, and guidance from my parents. I

had two role models, healthy and fulfilling relationships, a prolonged sense of security, and a

smooth runway to be a “kid.” I would learn skills that, while they may not have seemed

important at the time, were skills that I would use as I continued to mature. My identity was
 5

starting to take shape during this stage of adolescence. As a result, I had a good foundation ready

for continued development as I entered a new and challenging phase in my life: high school.

High School: Peaks, Valleys, Words of Wisdom and Heartache

Peaks, valleys, words of wisdom, and heartache. This best describes my high school

experience, and it was the first “season” where I would experience my first curves in the road,

with some of them being sharp.

The first semester of my freshman year would be my first opportunity to experience

considerable adversity during adolescence. While I was typically a “B” student during middle

school (7th and 8th grade), I had a rough adjustment to high school. There were new challenges

and distractions that I didn’t have before in school, including puberty, girls, and a new and

expanded circle of friends, to name a few. As a result, my ending GPA of my first semester was

2.17, and I received a “D” in my English class. I had never received such a low grade or GPA

before. I was disappointed in myself, and so were my parents. I learned the hard way what can

happen when one does not apply himself to a series of essential tasks; actions have

consequences. While I didn’t know much about the GPA requirements to get into college then, I

knew I didn’t do myself any favors with this performance. It was a reality check that I needed. I

would later claw my way back to an ending 2.83 GPA upon completing my freshman year.

During my sophomore year, my dad, whom I suspected was motivated by my previous

year’s academic performance, started having discussions with me about my future and what the

world was like after high school. A phrase he repeated numerous times stuck with me then and it

still does to this day: “Son, the world doesn’t owe you a living. You need to go out and earn it.”

Those profound words of wisdom were just as valid then as they are now, and his influence in
 6

this area of my life was vital in preparing me for how I planned to be a contributing member of

society down the road.

While I did not have the “how” part figured out yet, I had plenty of encouragement and

confidence instilled by my parents that I was going to have all the tools to do well in life. I was

tall for my age at the time, and due to how my parents prepared me to interact with older people,

I was often mistaken for someone older than I was. I was constantly asked what I planned to do

after I finished school (assuming I was already in college). My answer was always the same: “I’ll

be in sales of some sort.” While I had no idea what I wanted to do early on, when my parents

were in circles with our extended family and friends, they always said, “He’ll be in sales, just

like his dad.” But the more I heard it, the more it made sense. My dad was in sales, and he

provided for our family. Like my dad, I was competitive, loved talking with people, and was a

hard worker. I figured if he could do it and succeed, why couldn't I? But it was ultimately my

parents’ persistence in speaking my future career into existence that led me to adopt it as truth.

While they had no way to know for sure at the time, their influence would later lead me to a

successful career in sales.

As I entered my junior year, I became fascinated with competitive bicycle racing. My

parents bought me a mountain bike, and it wasn’t long before I rode it whenever I wasn’t

working or in school. After participating in my first race, I was hooked. I started competing for

the next six months until my curiosity peaked at competitive road bike racing. I had at the time at

a local grocery store where I eventually saved enough money to purchase my first road racing

bike. It wasn’t long before I was a two-sport bike racing competitor. I started competing in local

road races, winning or placing in the top five. I was soon invited to join a local racing team,

which helped take my training regime to the next level. This changed the way I viewed road bike
 7

racing. It went from being a hobby to a considerable part of my life as a junior and senior. By the

end of my junior year, I was on a rigid training schedule that I integrated with my academic and

work responsibilities. I was devoted to road racing full-time (while I was still in school and had a

part-time job) and would ride my mountain bike whenever I had extra time. Through my

consistent high placing in amateur category races, I would soon elevate to a new category where

nearly every person was on a regional or national team. I set out to reach this goal when I joined

the team and attained it about 12 months later. I eventually had to make a tough decision: (1)

pursue a career in professional bike racing, or (2) continue down a more “traditional” road of

going to school to assist in establishing a career in something else. I opted for the “something

else” strategy but learned what I could accomplish through hard work, discipline, and being

committed to a goal.

Meanwhile, in the background, while I was enjoying success from my dedication to a

sport, my parent’s marriage was struggling. By the middle of my junior year, they started to have

several verbal arguments; this was out of the norm. They eventually got to a point where they

began referring to the “D” word, for “divorce.” While I grew up in a household with Christian

values, there was a season when we stopped going to church as a family, which opened the door

for trouble to surface. In the Christian faith, marriage is viewed as a sacred covenant based on

promises and commitment. Along with this is the importance of each spouse concurrently

working to grow in their relationship with Jesus and to follow his examples. With this dimension

relatively absent from their marriage, they were drifting apart. I didn’t understand all of this back

then; I just knew the future of my parents' marriage didn’t look promising.

By my senior year, I had come to terms with the reality that my parents would likely

separate. In some respects, this forced me to grow up faster than I wanted to. It also put a strain
 8

on my relationship with my dad, as I believed at the time that he was the one responsible for the

eventual fracturing of the safe and secure family structure that I had known for seventeen years (I

would later in life learn that both of my parents were equally responsible). My relationship with

my dad was challenging during my senior year and beyond. He struggled with finding a good

balance between letting me spread my wings and being a father who could instill healthy

boundaries. He wanted me to live by his rules and I wanted to live by mine. We were both

stubborn, and I wanted my independence. I pushed and pushed, and eventually, my dad

acquiesced and basically let me have the freedom that I wanted at the time. While I may have

considered this a “victory,” the reality at the time was that it was likely painful for him to let go.

He just wanted what he felt was best for me and sometimes my immaturity and selfishness got in

the way of respecting my dad’s perspective and position of authority.

It is no secret that parenting is hard; there is no “owner’s manual.” My dad did not have

good role models of his own growing up. He grew up in a physically and mentally abusive

environment with his father. Thankfully, my childhood was not influenced by my dad’s. While he

had a short temper at times, he never verbally or physically abused my mother or me. Again, it

wasn’t until I was older that I could appreciate just how well my parents raised me, especially

my dad, considering how the environment I experienced was the very antithesis of what he

experienced. The only parenting example he could refer to was one he did not want to repeat. He

and my mom provided a childhood for me that many other kids would have loved to experience.

While I took it for granted at the time, I certainly do not now. My experiences growing up will

considerably influence my parenting strategy when I have a family of my own.

My high school years gave me opportunities for achievement, moments to learn the

consequences of my mistakes, experience deep heartache, and navigate events of pain and
 9

disappointment. All these moments were vital in the development of the person that I am today.

Despite the roller coaster of challenges, these years taught me about resilience. They taught me

to press on when things get tough. Additionally, I was equipped with profound words of wisdom

that would shape my decisions and perspectives on life and how I would be a part of it. While I

did not have complete visibility on how the next chapter of my life would unfold, I was confident

in my ability to navigate through whatever life had in store for me ahead.

“Decision” Time

Have you ever desperately looked for a solution to a problem in all the wrong places,

only to later find out the answer was in front of you the entire time? This was the case for me

immediately following high school. I was lost and looking to be found, although I wasn’t sure

what I was looking for. This would all change soon enough, a few months after I graduated high

school.

I grew up in a household with principles consistent with Christianity, but that didn’t mean

I always followed them. This was especially true after my parents separated, as the emotional

turmoil I experienced would cause me to turn to other means to cope with the pain. While I never

touched drugs or a drop of alcohol until I was of legal drinking age, I turned to unhealthy

relationships, but it still didn’t fill the void I felt in my life. During this season, a friend invited

me to a youth group event where I met the youth pastor, Gary, who was really into surfing and

bodyboarding like I was. We bonded quickly over this. A couple of weeks later, he invited me to

go with him and a small crew on a surf trip. While on this trip, he asked me some tough and

thought-provoking questions about my faith and whether I had ever accepted Jesus into my life.

He challenged me and I could not give him a sensible reason why I had not. I was mentally

broken and emotionally fatigued. I tried to exhaust many options to replace a void in my life
 10

when the answer was in front of me all along. So, on that December day in 2018, I accepted

Jesus into my heart while surfing at Otter Rock on the Oregon coast. I was baptized two weeks

later at my new church in Salem, where I had previously attended the youth group event.

It wasn’t long before I started serving the high school ministry as a volunteer on the

church’s youth staff, which resulted in building some healthy relationships, some of which I still

have today. Gary invested in me when I needed it the most, and I truly felt his love, which I

lacked when my relationship with my dad was strained. He had a tremendous influence during

that season of my life. God used him as a vessel to reach me, to “right the ship,” and I am still

eternally grateful for that. I still stay in touch with Gary, as he has since retired and moved with

his wife to a suburb on the outskirts of Houston, Texas.

My decision to accept Jesus into my life and the subsequent growth of my faith has

considerably impacted me over the past 31 years. It has influenced how I see the world and

equipped me to handle the peaks and valleys in my life. It has been a beacon of light amid

darkness and given me a life purpose beyond myself. My relationship with God and everything it

represents is central to my identity.

Post-High School: Eight Years of Exploration, Discovery, Trials, and Tribulations

Notable Christian author C.S. Lewis once said, “Life with God is not immunity from

difficulties, but peace in difficulties.” While I had a newfound faith in God, it didn’t mean my

life would get easier, as I would discover I had more “valleys” than “peaks” on the road ahead.

After high school was a time of uncertainty. My parents finalized their divorce shortly

after I graduated in 1992, and my mother moved to another home nearby while my dad stayed in
 11

the same house where I grew up. The family structure I had for more than seventeen years had

collapsed. While this was a difficult transition, I was determined to persevere through it.

I lived with my dad for a couple of months before arranging to rent a room from a friend.

My relationship with my dad wasn’t the best, and I was determined to live outside the “my

house, my rules” umbrella. I was 18 years old, knew everything, and wanted my independence. I

was in uncharted waters while wanting to discover who I was and how I would fit into society.

I planned to go to a local community college using financial aid assistance in the fall, but

that was later derailed after my dad didn’t want to disclose his financial data to the government.

Even though he paid his taxes yearly, he was always very weary of disclosing his earnings to any

government entity. It was something I never really understood. Regardless, I was frustrated over

this. It fueled the rift between my dad and me since it impacted my ability to go to school. This

was in addition to feeling like he was responsible for breaking up our family. After that, I

resented my dad for quite a while, but it drove my spirit to persevere through the challenges. (As

the years passed, I was eventually able to reconnect with my dad and reconcile the hurt I

experienced, which stemmed from my parents’ separation. We were both able to speak from our

hearts, air our grievances, and get back on much healthier speaking terms again.)

By the end of the summer after I graduated, I had saved enough money to complete two

semesters of community college at part-time status. However, I decided to enter the workforce

when I didn’t have the finances to continue supporting myself while going to school at the same

time.

While on summer break in 1993, I ended up going to work for a snowboard

manufacturer, Morrow Snowboards, which was rapidly becoming a fixture in this exploding new
 12

sport during the middle 90s. What started as a summer job was almost a 6-year stint in an

exciting industry. I started in manufacturing, learned the business, and ended up working in the

front office as an in-house sales and customer service representative for the Intermountain West

region. I was living a dream job as someone who loved snowboarding and the accompanying

lifestyle. I met many great people and built new relationships, and I had several opportunities to

snowboard in new places during my tenure there. The company was growing, and I aspired to

grow with it. However, that all ended abruptly when I was laid off when the company entered a

challenging financial season due to numerous missteps by company leadership almost two years

after it went public. This company went from being one of the largest manufacturers in the

industry to literally being bought out by one of its competitors to stave off bankruptcy two years

later. The competitor bought the rights to the name and the associated tooling and equipment but

eventually shuttered the facility’s doors and laid off nearly all the staff, including me. I was

devastated and now out of a job. After five and a half years, I was back to square one.

I decided to try to go back to the same community college once again, but it wasn’t long

before the reality set in that I couldn’t afford to go to school and support myself at the same time.

I was on unemployment assistance due to being laid off, which allowed me to complete one class

while I was searching for a new job. I knew I wanted to be in sales, but I needed to find a good

company to align with that didn’t require a college degree. The opportunities were not as

plentiful where I lived then, still in Salem, Oregon.

Utilizing a temporary work agency, I landed a marketing assistant position at one of the

nation’s largest hot tub manufacturers, Marquis Spas. After about six months in the role, I was

introduced to the national sales director and soon ended up working as a contract employee on

their national sales team. This is where I really “cut my teeth” into learning a sales process. In
 13

this case, it was business-to-consumer sales and a straight commission role. If I didn’t sell, I

didn’t eat. Fortunately, I was good at sales and didn’t go hungry. But not knowing if I could pay

the rent the following month was always a bit stressful. However, the trade-off was having the

ability to travel around the country and see different parts of the U.S., something that I aspired to

do while I was young. I wanted to go exploring and “spread my wings.” In addition, this role felt

like I had a traveling sales job that I thought only “someone who went to college” could have.

Yet, in the back of my mind, I still desired to have something where I could grow and acquire

more skills to diversify my resume. I knew this would be important for establishing a more

sustainable career in the future. Eventually, I wanted to settle down, get married, and have a

family. My lifestyle would not make this easy, and my income level would fluctuate, making it

challenging to plan a budget. I didn’t want to bring that into a relationship. In addition, I wanted

to work for a company in a business-to-business sales environment and have a job with a good

salary plus a commission. As mentioned earlier, the “commission-only” role was stressful at

times.

While there were some tall peaks and deep valleys during those eight years after high

school, I had several experiences that, in many ways, led me down the path that influenced the

person I am today. It was all part of a much bigger picture for me, which was unknown then. I

had to navigate different types of adversity: the loss of a job, an inability to stay in school, a

broken family structure, and a strained relationship with my dad. But I was learning new skills

that I hoped would open doors for me, provide stability, and allow me to grow personally and

professionally. While I had a strategy, it was still loose, and I didn’t have all the pieces to the

puzzle at the time. Still, I was determined to find my way in life, even if it was the hard way at

times. This is where my “perseverance” component began to settle in as part of my DNA.

 14

A Lesson on “Doing the Right Thing”

Legendary basketball coach John Wooden said it best: “The true test of a man’s character

is what he does when no one is watching.” Character is developed, not something that someone

is born with. One of the most important aspects of someone’s character is their level of integrity.

In my professional and personal life, I want to be known for having the highest level of integrity

and one who makes ethical decisions, regardless of what might be at stake or whether it is the

popular choice at the time. I learned early on in my career the importance of this, albeit the hard

way.

Around mid-2001, I decided to pursue a role within the corporate sales division for

Voice Stream Wireless. This was exciting for me as I could wear a suit every day. In my mind,

this was symbolic in that I now worked in “Corporate America,” which, at the time, I felt was an

essential step in my journey to establish a sales career despite not having a college degree. My

quantifiable results in sales over the previous two years helped remove the typical “college

degree required” barrier that was so prevalent at the time. As such, this was my first foray into

the business-to-business sales environment, where I learned what a sales process and longer sales

cycle were. In many cases, I worked with large customers and the process was more complex. I

experienced success after closing my first large sale about five months into my employment. It

validated that I could succeed in a “corporate” setting despite not being college-educated.

About eight months into my employment, I faced a situation where my boss and I were in

the final stages of closing a sizeable corporate agreement. The last step was to obtain a signature

from the decision maker on a revised contract indicating they were ready to move forward. This

isn’t unusual, as it is a routine part of the sales process, but my manager and I were hoping to

close this deal before the sales quarter ended. As the last day of the quarter arrived, my manager
 15

was determined to get this contract signed and told me to sit in the reception area of this large

company until I could secure a meeting with the decision-maker to get his final signature to

move forward. I wasn’t to return to the office without it. By the end of the day, I wasn’t

successful, and I returned to the office. In response, my manager essentially created an

environment where he insinuated that if I wanted to keep my job, I needed to “find a way” to get

that signature on the contract. The deal was done, or at least we thought, and it was crucial for

my manager to get the contract submitted so it would reflect his region’s sales numbers (and his

bonus). In response, I did what I now consider unthinkable and transferred my decision makers’

signature from a previous contract onto a new one using a copy machine. Even twenty-some

years later, I’m embarrassed to admit such a thing. I didn’t feel right, but I felt stuck and didn’t

want to lose my job. I was young and naïve; this was my first experience in what I considered

“corporate life.”

To make a long story short, the deal fell through after this “signed” contract was

submitted and questions were raised by senior leadership. It would result in a deeper

investigation that revealed my manager was involved in several instances of submitting contracts

before they were officially signed or, in some cases, were not signed at all. It was later revealed

that his quarterly bonus was tied to the number of activations, and there was no penalty when

deactivations occurred. He was intentionally “gaming” the system and was subsequently

terminated after the investigation. Thankfully, my job was spared, considering the circumstances

surrounding my situation. His termination later resulted in litigation, and I would have to provide

a deposition on what transpired. It was uncomfortable and a life lesson that would stick with me

to this day.
 16

I learned unequivocally through this experience the importance of my actions needing to

always be on the “right side” of the ethical line and that “doing the right thing” is essential, even

if it is an unpopular choice at the time or may result in adverse consequences. It is a principle

that I live by in all facets of my life.

A Turning Point in My Career

Martin Luther King, Jr. once said, “A person going nowhere can be sure of reaching his

destination. Take the first step in faith. You don't have to see the whole staircase – just take the

first step.” For me, this first step of faith would later be a critical turning point in my career.

While I had experienced some success in “individual contributor” roles thus far, I had

essentially no “people leadership” experience. I knew that if I ever wanted to get into a

leadership role in the future, I would need to align with an organization that would provide a path

for such an opportunity.

After spending more than a turbulent two years in the wireless industry, a close friend

turned me to a company that he recently started working at, Enterprise Rent-A-Car. This

company historically hired its workforce right out of college for its management training

program and it was my best shot at learning new skills to enhance my resume. With a friend who

now worked for the company and influenced hiring, I could bypass the college degree

requirement due to my previous sales background, which was often a barrier for me.

As a result, in 2003, I was on my way to working for a Fortune 500 company where I

would learn how to run a business, lead and empower people through best-in-class training, build

several lasting relationships, and equip myself with valuable new competencies that I could

employ both then and even still to this day.

 17

Everyone in the company started as a management trainee, regardless of someone’s

degree or experience. It is only through navigating a series of rigorous training programs over the

course of 12-18 months that one is eligible to be promoted. Thanks to my previous sales

experience, I could leverage my existing skills and was consistently a top performer in the

region. My success in each role allowed me to continue to move up the organizational ladder. It

validated that I could succeed in business and found a place to call “home” for over five years.

My experience working at Enterprise was the catalyst I needed to change my career

trajectory from shaky, to ushering in a level of stability that I hadn’t experienced before. While

this was important for my professional development, it also gave me new confidence and

elevated my self-esteem. In our society, considerable emphasis is placed on a man’s identity

based on his work. Before Enterprise, I felt insufficient in this area. However, with my new-

found stability, performance, and fulfillment I was enjoying, I felt more secure in who I was and

that my contributions to society were more meaningful than before.

Building on My Success

"The meeting of preparation with opportunity generates the offspring we call luck."

Initially coined by renowned business consultant and motivational speaker Tony Robbins, this

saying resonated with me as it was on the wall of one of my senior leaders at Enterprise. My

“preparation” would soon collide with “opportunity,” resulting in a new and exciting chapter in

my career to soon emerge.

By the end of my fifth year at Enterprise, I reached a point where my promotability was

limited, as there was minimal movement in the Pacific Northwest beyond a regional manager

role, which was the only way to get promoted within the state at that point. I wasn’t interested in
 18

moving out of state at the time. As such, the friend who got me in the door at Enterprise had

since moved on to another Fortune 500 company, Grainger Industrial Supply, and was doing

quite well. Again, due to his referral, history repeated itself, and I followed him there. We still

joke about it to this day. He and I work for different companies now.

In 2009, I started as a territory sales representative, focusing more on new business

development. Given my previous sales and business development background, I excelled in this

area and started building a personal brand within the region. This would soon result in an

opportunity to be promoted to a desirable commercial account manager position within the

company. I was aligned with several large, multi-site companies across the Pacific Northwest,

where I managed and grew the relationships for each one. With this promotion, I was now

charged with managing a territory worth millions of dollars, which was a significant career

milestone for someone aspiring to increase their level of responsibility in a sales capacity.

While I exceeded my territory goals for eight consecutive years with the company, 2013

was one of my most memorable. This was the year my performance led to my career's largest

year-end commission check, and I qualified for an all-expenses-paid annual sales recognition trip

to Hawaii in early 2014. This was a difficult trip to qualify for, as it was awarded to the

company's top 5 percent of all sales positions (representing over 3,000 sellers). It was the first

time I qualified for a sales recognition trip of this magnitude, and it motivated me to continue my

pursuit of success.

My track record of exceeding my goals each year was vital in my professional

development and in building my brand. It exposed me to influential leaders in the organization,

many of whom I was able to eventually align as part of my sponsorship team, per se. It was these

leaders who selected me to participate in the company’s global emerging leadership (GEL)
 19

program in 2016. This was a 6-month program designed to complement my preparation for the

next step in my career as a national account manager.

After several interviews, I was placed on the “bench” to be promoted. During this time, a

new vice president was aligned with the national sales division, and one of his desires was for

future national account managers to be based near the headquarters of the accounts they

managed. Previously, this wasn’t a factor, and my own regional sales vice president tried to get

this barrier removed. The VP wouldn’t budge as he was trying to set a precedent. This new

reality was disappointing as my wife and I wanted to relocate to Phoenix with this promotion. I

was stuck for the time being.

Coincidentally, a couple of weeks after my new reality set in, I was approached by one of

Grainger’s suppliers for a regional sales manager role for the western U.S. and western Canada.

The competencies required for this role were similar to the national account manager position I

had spent so much time developing for. After a few conversations and interviews, the rest was

history; I decided to revolve out of Grainger and into the company I work for today, Alpha

ProTech, a manufacturer of disposable apparel and infection control devices.

My time at Grainger was pivotal in my career, as all the professional training I had

acquired and the internal and external relationships I built were instrumental in helping propel

my career forward to a new level. This was important for several reasons. First, my experience

added or enhanced several competencies on my resume, which would result in my ability to be

promoted to a senior-level sales role (outside of the company). Second, it paved the way for my

wife and me to relocate to Arizona (which was a significant milestone). Third, it allowed me to

create a single-income household since my wife and I desired to expand our family. Fourth and

finally, it allowed me to enjoy continued success in my sales career, which maintains a level of
 20

confidence in my abilities to be successful. Again, as a man in today’s society, while I realize my

identity has Christ at the center, a part of it is still tied to my work. My job showcases that I can

be a meaningful contributor to society and provide for my family. Although stereotypes have

shifted to where either partner is on equal footing to contribute to the family finances, I still aim

to have a sole-provider family structure, just like I did during my childhood.

Finding the “One”

"Then the Lord God said, "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a

helper fit for him." This passage from the Bible, Genesis 2:18, and several others, hints at God’s

design of marriage and its benefits. That said, once I established the stability I felt I lacked earlier

in my career, I would soon bring this area of my life into more focus. I was starting to consider a

search for the “one.”

The first few years while I was at Enterprise demanded long hours, and I was heavily

invested in establishing my career within the company at the time. I didn’t want to allocate the

time and energy required to build a relationship with a significant other. However, after a

conversation with my mom near the end of 2007, I put more effort into expanding this area of my

life. She convinced me I needed to join the dating website “eharmony.com” because “I wasn’t

going to find a quality woman in a bar.” So, I did, and to make a long story short, it worked. My

now wife, Angela, was the first match that came up. She had all the most important qualities I

desired in a woman, and I did for her in a man; she was the “one.” Nearly three years later, we

were married in a beautiful, Christmas-themed wedding in December of 2010.

Getting married represented a significant change in my life. I grew up as an only child

and was used to being alone. I provided for myself, made decisions for myself, and had little
 21

responsibility for anyone else. Everything changed when I got married; I was now one-half of a

partnership, and “husband” represented a considerable part of my identity. While these were all

welcomed changes, it was still an adjustment. Overnight, I had a built-in incentive to be a better

version of myself. There were areas of my life that I wanted to work on, especially in developing

better faith-based habits that would contribute to a healthy marriage. My outlook on life and my

career had a greater sense of urgency than I had placed on it before. I needed to start thinking

about financial stability in the future, retirement planning, my long-term career strategy, and so

on. In other words, getting married was my core drive to start “adulting.” Outside of accepting

Christ into my life, it was one of the best decisions I have made. My wife instills confidence in

me if I am in doubt, encourages me if I am discouraged, loves and accepts me for my strengths

and flaws, and lifts me up if I ever feel down. She is my biggest fan, cheerleader, challenger, and

best friend, and I can’t imagine “doing life” without her.

The Call I Never Wanted

In the Bible, Isaiah 41:10 says: “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed,

for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right

hand.” I remember this passage when I face trials in my life. Little did I know that when I woke

up on the morning of June 10th, 2014, my life would be forever changed by the end of the day.

That afternoon, while I was on my way home from work, I received a call from a number

I didn’t recognize. It came up as “blocked.” At first, I thought it was a “spam” caller. Upon

answering it, I wish it had been, as it was much, much worse. I still remember it like it was

yesterday. It was a police detective from the county coroner’s office from where my dad

relocated to several years after my parents separated. He informed me that my dad “was involved
 22

in an incident, and it didn’t end well for him.” My dad was gone. In a matter of a few seconds,

my life was turned upside down.

By this time, I had dealt with the death of a friend who died in a plane crash ten years

prior, but nothing could have prepared me for this. I was thrust into a world that one only sees on

television. I had newspaper and television reporters trying to track me down for statements

(which I never did provide). I needed to handle all the funeral and memorial arrangements, write

an obituary, handle my dad’s estate, and work with two different police agencies to meet their

needs, all while trying to process that my dad had died. It was only through my Christian faith,

my amazingly strong wife, and a few sleeping aides I used for the first few nights, that I was able

to get through the most traumatic and emotionally taxing trial in my life. I had never leaned on

both as hard as I did during those two weeks while I was out of town going through this.

The circumstances surrounding my dad’s death were unimaginable and challenging to

process. He died due to two gunshot wounds to his chest, as two sheriffs fired on him. Even to

this day, I don’t know all the details, even though it was on the front page of the town newspaper

for three straight days. I never read any of them and still have no plans to. All I know is that half

the town believed he committed suicide, and the other half suspected foul play was involved and

that he was murdered. My wife knows more about what happened than I do. I did not want to

know all the finite details since it wouldn’t change the outcome. I wanted to preserve my fond

memories of my dad, not dwell on the details of how he died or investigate all the different

theories surrounding it.

While traumatic at the time, navigating through this trial considerably impacted my life

moving forward. First, the bar was raised on what “real” adversity was and how much I could

handle. While I didn’t want to go through this experience, it did give me a new perspective on
 23

how much strength I have to navigate difficult circumstances. Second, it gave me more courage

to tackle specific challenges since nothing would compare to what I just went through. Third, I

deepened my ability to empathize with others; it softened me. While I was experiencing the

turbulence associated with my dad’s death, the world kept on turning. A profound takeaway was

that you never know what someone might be going through at any given time. On the surface,

someone might appear as though they are doing “fine,” but underneath the surface might be a

different story. That said, I was reminded of the importance of extending grace to others, even if

they have wronged me. A couple of days after my dad’s passing, I distinctly remember walking

into a grocery store where the lady at the check-out stand would ask how my day was going. She

had no idea what a loaded question that was. Unbeknownst to her, it was my dad’s picture on the

front cover of the newspaper in her checkout line for all the wrong reasons. Instead of an

authentic response, which I’m sure she wasn’t prepared for, I would respond with “good.” Little

did she know I was utterly wrecked inside and in the middle of a storm. Fourth, it led me to a

more profound connection to God, as there were plenty of times during this storm when I could

feel His presence. Fifth and finally, it highlighted the importance of protecting my mental health.

Given the nature and complexity surrounding my dad’s death, I needed to unpack and process

this in a way that went beyond the realm of conventional biblical wisdom through my pastor. I

consulted with a professional Christian therapist to ensure that I had no feelings still pent up

inside that would become an issue down the road.

In the end, I was thankful that my dad and I were able to reconnect and repair our

relationship. Nothing was left unspoken. I reminded my dad how grateful I was that he raised me

how he did and how much I loved him many times. Going through this unimaginable trial
 24

reminded me how important it is to ensure nothing is left unsaid to the people in my life who are

important to me.

Finishing What I Started.

“Where did you go to college?” Until three years ago, it was this question that I hated

being asked by anyone the most. Over the last 20 years, I have been fortunate to work alongside

most team members who have college degrees. However, my lack of a college education has

been a source of insecurity for me for a long time, and at times, it seemed like a goal that was

questionable if I would ever accomplish. There were some instances where it was a barrier to my

promotability if I desired a more senior leadership role within a company. It was always in the

back of my mind as something I wanted to complete “someday.” It was a piece of my identity I

felt was missing and one that I longed for. That all changed during 2020, when COVID wreaked

havoc on our world.

During “normal” times, I traveled at least one or two nights per week for work. But,

when my company banned traveling for the foreseeable future, I looked at this not as an

opportunity to loaf around the house but as a chance to head back to school to finish what I

started. Getting started was a tough pill to swallow and a bit intimidating at first. I had 19 credit

hours of college coursework to my name; I was a freshman in college in my mid-40s. I had not

touched a schoolbook or written an academic paper for 21 years. Going to school online was not

even a “thing” back then. After researching the different degree options at Arizona State

University, my decision was clear: I wanted a bachelor’s degree in organizational leadership

(OGL).
 25

But, before starting my OGL journey, I opted to complete all of my general requirements

through the Maricopa Community College network to prevent overspending for my education

since I’m self-funding this pursuit on my own. I started with two classes for the first semester to

adjust to being a student again. Then, once I validated that I could do well in the online format, I

decided to elevate to full-time status from the second semester onward. After completing all my

general requirements, I transferred to ASU to complete my OGL degree coursework.

While I have over 20 years of experience working in primarily “individual contributor”

roles, I do have some experience working as a “people leader” as well. However, I felt I lacked

the “formal learning” necessary to elevate my craft to be a better-rounded, more effective leader.

That said, I wanted ASU’s OGL program to serve as the vehicle to prepare me to be an effective

leader in today’s business environment.

Two years later, I have developed a solid foundation of several fundamental leadership

principles, which I will continue to build upon after graduation in a few short weeks. My

coursework immersed me in a new world of theories, concepts, models, ideas, processes, etc.,

that would ultimately enhance my foundational core leadership competencies. I have developed a

deeper understanding of what it means to be a “best-in-class” leader and a new awareness of my

strengths and areas where I would like to focus during my post-academic development. My goal

has always been to be an effective leader who inspires and empowers others to be the best

version of themselves. If my team is successful, then I am successful. Thanks to this investment

in my personal and professional development over the past three years, I feel I am well on my

way to realizing this!

Moreover, my academic journey has impacted my life in another way; it validated that I

can achieve in the classroom, just as I do in my professional life. After I obtained straight “A’s”
 26

for two semesters early in my journey, I set another personal goal of graduating Summa Cum

Laude, the highest honors status possible in academics. I figured if I applied the same level of

commitment, work ethic, persistence, and execution of efficient time management that I do in my

professional life, this would be a goal to strive for academically as well. I struggled somewhat

with my grades in high school for various reasons, but I wanted to prove to myself that I could

do it. In the end, my academic performance in high school did not repeat itself in college; I will

graduate with a Summa Cum Laude distinction in a few weeks.

Reflection

As I reflect on my life’s journey and the collection of stories I have showcased, I have

been reminded of all I have experienced that has shaped my character into who I am today. I

have experienced moments of great joy and happiness, celebrations of achievement, the

conquering of goals, and the love of many good people. However, I have encountered and

navigated several challenges along the way. Hardships, failures, and heartache tested my

resilience and resolve. Through it all, I have realized that while these challenges were difficult at

the time, they were all vehicles contributing to my personal growth. They made me stronger. My

struggles taught me about perseverance, patience, and, most importantly, that I am not on this

journey alone and that my life is only a small part of a much grander picture. As I have matured,

especially in my personal Faith journey, my focus has been less on “self” and more on how I can

best “serve” instead.

That said, I look at my life story differently now. I consider all my experiences to be part

of God’s divine plan for my life, regardless of their nature. They represent puzzle pieces that,

when finished, will create a picture far greater than I could ever imagine or achieve on my own. I
 27

know that His plan for my life is still unfolding, and I look forward to the chapters that are yet to

be written.

I was initially looking forward to writing this narrative, but I soon discovered it was more

difficult than I perceived it would be. I wanted to be authentic and transparent in my approach to

this assignment and commit to it. To do that, it required me to be more vulnerable than I have

ever been on paper (or, in some cases, at all). Sharing my challenges and expressing how I felt

during and immediately after high school was sometimes difficult. What was hardest was writing

about the experience of losing my dad. I have discussed it in limited circles, but never on paper. I

had to write this section over a couple of days. Although his death occurred more than ten years

ago, all the “feels” associated with the event are still fresh. One never forgets it; you learn to

manage the pain over time. However, writing about what occurred and what I felt was also, in a

way, therapeutic.

On another note, considering that some of the content of my narrative is deeply personal,

I am hesitant to place it on my e-portfolio for the general public to read. However, for this class,

I will include it.

My E-Portfolio Website: https://steveharrisasu.weebly.com/