Thursday nov 2nd 2023

Literature and love 15

Toxic masculinity in “Good looking”
Toxic masculinity is often equated with harmful traditional cultural norms such
as emotional repression, dominant attitudes and behaviours, and aggressive competition.
According to the journal of school psychology, toxic masculinity is a term that is
frequently used to describe a collection of ‘socially regressive (masculine) traits that serve to
foster domination, the devaluation of women, homophobia, and wanton violence’.
We will see elements of toxic masculinity exhibited by the focal male character
in Thammavongsa’s short story
Although the male characters in ‘good looking’ are not physically violent, they
often express views and engage in behaviours that devalue women.

Narcissm
The focal character in the short story – referred to as ‘dad’ by the first person
narrator – shows signs of being self absorbed, conceited, and self important
According to the mayo clinic – NPD is a ‘mental condition In which people have
an inflated sense of their own importance, a deep need for excessive attention and admiration,
troubled relationships, and a lack of empathy for others.
NPD can cause problems in a relationship, and causes people with the disorder
to be unhappy and disappointed when they are not given the special favours and admiration
that they believe they deserve. They may find their relationship unfulfilling, and others may not
enjoy being around them

When self love goes bad

Philautia, a Greek work that refers to self love, has both positive and negative
potential, in a positive sense, it describes it as self respect, and self acceptance
In its negative way, it can manifest as narcissm and selfishness
On the face of it, theres nothing especially narcisstic about believing yourself to
be good looking.

Philautia; walking a fine line?

The inclusion of the words ‘thought himself a good looking man’ indicates that
this information is not coming from the son as a flattering observation.
That is coming from the father himself, which means that he has been letting
other people know about how he rates his own physical attractiveness.
Thursday nov 2nd 2023

The Narrator
The narrator is the focal characters son. The story is from the perspective of the
son and lends to a sense of reliability to the account.
He knows his father in a way that a non family member might not .
We are given the impression that the narrator has been watching his father
closely over the years, taking note of small but significant details, building up a picture of a
personality that seems to be impacted by narcisstic tendancies

Toxic Behaviour’s and relationships

The narrator’s dad relates to women in ways that can be described as ‘toxic’
Recall that toxic relationships are characterized by attitudes and behaviours that
are emotionally, and even physically damaging towards the other people involved
No physical damage occurs in ‘good looking’, but the dads narcissm fuels a
manipulative approach to dealing with women, not only at work, but also in personal
relationships.