Date : 18/01/2024

3 KEYS TO SUCCESS
⁃ SIS. NIDHA AHMED

• This is a very important topic for ladies especially. This is a very beautiful topic.
• Everyone’s intention is success.
• Real success for a believer is to be saved by Allah from Jahanam.
• There is nothing wrong is striving for worldly success.

'Uqbah bin 'Amir narrated: "I said: 'O Messenger of Allah! What is the means to
salvation?' He said: 'That you control your tongue, suffice yourself your house, and cry over your
sins.'"

• These 3 points are very practical. During this time, if we try to implement these 3
points, Allah will make our life easy.

i) Control your tongue

• Nowadays, talking is something that people don’t have control over. They just talk
what comes in their mouth. We don’t see the age, respect isn’t given.. Nowadays, we talk in the
same tone with everyone.
• Abu Sa'id Al-Khudri (May Allah be pleased with him) said: The Prophet ‫ﷺ‬said,
"When the son of Adam gets up in the morning, all the limbs humble themselves before the tongue
and say: 'Fear Allah for our sake because we are with you: (i.e., we will be rewarded or punished as a
result of what you do) if you are straight, we will be straight; and if you are crooked, we will become
crooked."'
• All the sins start from our tongue.
• We’ve to try to control our tongue because then life will become easier.
• Scholars say : ‘The wounds of a sword may heal one day; the wounds of the tongue,
they never may.’
• You’ll not know how much your words might hurt the other person.
• .﴾ ١٩ ﴿‫ِیر‬ ِ ‫ص ۡوتُ ۡٱل َحم‬ َ َ‫ت ل‬ِ ٰ⁠ ‫ص ۡوتِكَ إِن أَنك ََر ۡٱۡلَصۡ َو‬ ۡ ‫ٱغض‬
َ ‫ُض مِن‬ ِ ‫َو ۡٱق‬
ۡ ‫ص ۡد فِی َم ۡشیِكَ َو‬
And be moderate in your pace and lower your voice; indeed, the most disagreeable of sounds is the
voice of donkeys.
- Luqmān, Ayah 19
• An intelligent person always speaks less.
• How much ever Deen we learn, that much only we have to keep shutting our
mouths. You should have the fear that the Angel will write whatever you speak.
• It’s very easy for us to get angry at our parents. We should actually speak more
nicely with our family. Allah has told us to not even say “uff” to them. There is a lot of generational
gap. You shouldn’t react much to what they say. We should explain to them nicely. We all know this,
but the problem arises when we don’t implement it. The more back answers you give, the worse the
situation becomes.
• The more you seal your tongue, the easier your life will get.
• َ ‫طبَ ُه ُم ۡٱل َج ٰـ ِهلُونَ قَالُوا‬
.﴾ ٦٣ ﴿‫سلَ ٰـمࣰا‬ َ ‫َوإِذَا خَا‬
And when the ignorant address them [harshly], they say [words of] peace,
- Al-Furqān, Ayah 63

ii) Let your house suffice you

• The best place for us during this time of fitnah is our homes.
• The Prophet ‫ﷺ‬said: “The safety of a man at times of fitnah is in his staying home.”
• Nowadays , there is music everywhere, people aren’t dressed properly, alcohol, etc..
 • Once upon a time, Muslims used to not go to places where alcohol was served. But
now, if they say they serve halal, then the Muslims go.
• We follow our desires.
• Better to avoid going out as much as possible.
• If the house is good, there’ll be good youth, kids, adults, etc.
• When one house becomes good, the whole neighbourhood will become good.
Similarly, when one house becomes bad, the whole neighbourhood will become bad.
• It’s not about building a beautiful house..
• We should make our house our comfort zone. We should make it a place of peace for
our kids.
• How to achieve a beautiful house?
1. Who is the person we choose as our spouse?
⁃ You should select a spouse who will help you build righteous children.
⁃ We always forgot Deen matters.
⁃ When you pray 5 times a day, you aren’t considered religious, rather you’re
considered to be a Muslim.
⁃ We have to see the Deen of the person.
⁃ You can’t think that you’ll be able to change a person after marriage..
⁃ 1st we should change ourselves, then we should try to change others.
⁃ We have to be very careful about the kind of spouse we choose for ourselves as well
as for our children.
2. You should grow together in Deen
⁃ Eemaan keeps increasing & decreasing.
⁃ If we don’t stay in touch with Deen, it will decide.
⁃ Whatever you learn, you’ve to share with your spouse.
⁃ Take your children to whatever classes you attend.
⁃ "The Messenger of Allah ‫ﷺ‬said: may Allah () have mercy on a woman who gets up
at night and prays, then she wakes her husband and prays, and if he refuses she sprinkles water in his
face.'"
⁃ Scholars say : If your husband gets angry when you wake him up for Qiyam, then
you’ll understand what is the level of your husband’s eemaan & you have to work to fix it.
⁃ Everyone doesn’t get the chance to pray Qiyam, Allah chooses as to who should pray
it.
3. Nurture your child the right way
⁃ There’s a saying that upto 12 years, you can teach them at least 8 languages.
⁃ We have to work on their Nafs, mind & body. We have to teach their Nafs about the
Deen, their mind about the worldly matters..
⁃ We should teach them how to live life.
⁃ You have to make you child flexible.
⁃ We should teach our kids to face the problem and not run-away from it.
⁃ ‫ٱج َعلُوا بُیُوتَكُمۡ ق ِۡبلَةࣰ َوأَقِی ُموا ٱلصلَ ٰوةَ َو َبش ِِر‬
ۡ ‫س ٰى َوأَخِ ی ِه أَن تَ َبو َءا ِلق َۡو ِمكُ َما ِب ِمصۡ َر بُیُوتࣰا َو‬
َ ‫َوأَ ۡو َح ۡینَا ِإلَ ٰى ُمو‬
.﴾ ٨٧ ﴿ َ‫ٱل ُم ۡؤ ِمنِین‬ۡ
And We inspired to Moses and his brother, Settle your people in Egypt in houses and make your
houses [facing the] qiblah and establish prayer and give good tidings to the believers.
- Yūnus, Ayah 87.
Scholars say how to make your house qiblah : a place where Allah is worshipped & where Allah is
glorified.
⁃ Nowadays, fitnah isn’t only for children, there’s fitnah for parents as well.
⁃ When they are small, we have to train them.
 ⁃ You can’t allow your children go sleep with their opposite gender cousins.

iii) Cry over your sins

⁃ Seek forgiveness with Allah for your sins.
⁃ We are experts in searching other’s faults, but we don’t know what are the mistakes
we do.
⁃ The Prophet ‫ﷺ‬said: "Every son of Adam sins, and the best of the sinners are the
repentant."
⁃ Allah loves those who seek forgiveness from Him. He waits for people to seek
forgiveness..
⁃ Umar () used to pretend to cry if he wasn’t able to, and over a period of time due to
pretending, real tears would flow.
⁃ Try to cry in sujood.
⁃ Abdullah ibn Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) said he would rather shed tears
from the fear of Allah than give a thousand dinars in charity.
⁃ ﴾ ١٥٣ ﴿ࣰ‫ت ثُم تَابُوا مِن بَعۡ ِدهَا َو َءا َمنُوا إِن َربكَ مِن بَعۡ ِدهَا لَغَفُورࣰ رحِ یم‬ ِ ‫ع ِملُوا ٱلسیِـَٔا‬
َ َ‫َوٱلذِین‬
But those who committed misdeeds and then repented after them and believed - indeed your Lord,
thereafter, is Forgiving and Merciful.
- Al-Aʿrāf, Ayah 153
⁃ Shaytan’s work is to call us to keep committing sins.
⁃ Mu’awiyah ibn Jaydah reported: The Messenger of Allah ‫ ﷺ‬said, “Three eyes will
never see the Hellfire, an eye standing guard in the way of Allah, an eye weeping from the fear of
Allah, and an eye lowering its gaze from what Allah has forbidden.”
⁃ It’s said Umar () had 2 lines in his face because of how much he cried.
⁃ We should learn about Allah’s mercy.
⁃ The Prophet ‫ﷺ‬said:“I see what you do not see. Heaven is groaning and it has a right
to be groaning: there is no space the width of four fingers in it but an angel placing his forehead in
prostration to Allah the Exalted.”
⁃ We don’t know when death can come, so we should keep seeking forgiveness from
Allah.
⁃ When our eemaan decreases, we should read the stories of Muhammad ‫ & ﷺ‬the
sahabah’s.
⁃ .﴾ ٦٠ ﴿ َ‫َوٱلذِینَ ی ُۡؤتُونَ َما َءاتَوا وقُلُو ُب ُهمۡ َو ِجلَة أَن ُهمۡ ِإلَ ٰى َر ِب ِهمۡ َر ⁠ٰ ِج ُعون‬
And they who give what they give while their hearts are fearful because they will be returning to
their Lord –
- Al-Muʾminūn, Ayah 60
Aisha () asked Muhammad ‫ﷺ‬if this ayah was for those who commit sins like Zina, etc.. . Prophet ‫ﷺ‬
said no because it spoke about those who pray, give sadaqah, fast, etc.. but they fear their deeds not
getting accepted by Allah.
Hasan Al-Basri speaks about this ayah : “They do all the good actions correctly but they are very
scared if Allah will accept it or no.”
⁃ A believer’s life should be between fear & hope.
⁃ Hypocrites do bad actions & feel safe.