- Hello folks, today

we're gonna be looking

at the five traits of the dark empath.

I should say upfront there

isn't actually a clinical entity

called a dark empath,

but it is a way of understanding

an abusive personality type.

The first trait that identifies somebody

as being a dark empath

is that they don't get much of a payoff

from normal social interaction.

Even though they are technically

very cognitively empathic,

they don't really enjoy

being around people,

and they're marked for being

quite emotionally detached

from the people around them.

This is all, despite the fact,

that they actually do crave

an awful lot of attention,

so they're highly empathic

but in a completely cognitive way.

They crave a lot of attention,

and they don't get much joy

from being around people.

The second trait that identifies

somebody as a dark empath

is their heightened ability

to effectively map other people.

They're very, very good

at looking at other people

and mapping what they're all about.

They're not particularly good

at mapping themselves and

their own motivations.

The third thing that

would identify somebody

as being a dark empath

is that they're particularly

detached emotionally.

They're very distant emotionally.

They're quite cold as a personality.

The fourth trait that identifies somebody

as being a dark empath

is their grandiosity,

they're extremely grandiose,

but that grandiosity is pushed back

and is in a sort of a
dynamic polarity fight

with a pronounced degree

of self-criticism.

The fifth trait that identifies

somebody as a dark empath

is that they are

exploitative interpersonally.

They really lack any sense of morality.

And they can be very, very cruel.

Those are the five traits

that identify somebody

as a dark empath,

which, as I said, is a
non-clinical definition.

What I think is happening

is you're really talking

about the classic case

of somebody who has fragile

or covert narcissism,

which means that even though they believe

that they're entitled to
special treatment by people,

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they actually struggle

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to get that special treatment from people

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and that evokes an awful lot
of feelings of shame in them.

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So they're constantly
in this exhausting cycle

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of feeling very, very grandiose,

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of having these
delusional, grandiose ideas

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about themselves,

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but then when they get into reality,

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they fail to convince others.

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They can't be classic
grandiose narcissists,

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'cause they fail to convince the world

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of their specialness,
of their superiority.

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Every time they go out into the world,

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and they fail to do that, it
induces narcissistic injury,

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which then, of course,
induces narcissistic rage.

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So people who some would
describe as a dark empath,

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I would just say that's a
covert or vulnerable narcissist,

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actually, they experience more rage

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than grandiose narcissists.

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Interestingly enough, some
of the research that I read

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indicates that there's a
higher degree of propensity

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towards violence amongst those
defined as covert narcissists

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versus those defined
as classic narcissists.

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Because of the frustration,

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because of the constant
idealized self-injury,
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that narcissistic injury,

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they can actually be more violent

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than grandiose narcissists

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who are not really known for
being particularly violent.

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In the literature that I read,

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they particularly pointed
out domestic violence,

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violence towards children,
and violence towards animals,

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as being correlated
with covert narcissism.

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Now, if a dark empath
is a covert narcissist,

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which I'm claiming, I could be wrong,

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then that is a trait that
you could find amongst people

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who have been defined
as dark empaths as well.

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The core to this is delusion, grandiosity,
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the sense of entitlement,

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the desire to take revenge on people.

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This is a very vengeful personality type.

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This is a very sensitive personality type.

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The person that you're defining
as being a dark empath,

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you may also notice that
you get to a point with them

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where even though they
are quite empathetic,

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and you can say no, they're
definitely empathetic,

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'cause they definitely understand

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the feelings of other people.

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And yet, you still notice

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that they're hypersensitive to criticism,

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and they are actually prone

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to being quite emotionally dysregulated.
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You may not see any
overt displays of anger,

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but at a certain level, you
realize there is a threat there,

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and they are actually getting quite angry.

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What this leads to, typically,

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is the sense that you
have to walk on eggshells

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to be around this person.

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At that point,

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when you're looking at all

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of the different personality disorders,

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you can start to see how if a
dark empath is a mirror model,

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let's say, of a covert narcissist,

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these are the areas
where covert narcissism

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can, sometimes, start vectoring in

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with borderline personality disorder,

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where the person's very
emotionally dysregulated.

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They're potentially prone to extreme rage.

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But with a dark empath, it
probably would be a cold rage.

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They're not gonna actually
start throwing things

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and shouting and showing
you, no demonstrative rage,

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but the rage manifests in
their desire for vengeance

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and so, if they are slighted,

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they will go after the person

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with a high degree of persistence.

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Ladies and gentlemen, I hope
that you enjoyed this video.

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If you'd like to know more
about overcoming relationships

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with narcissistic personality types,

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please check out my new course,

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Unplug from the Matrix
of Narcissistic Abuse.

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It's available from this link down here,

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and I look forward to
seeing you again next time.

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Thank you.