Charming Bastard

Jason Capital: Yo, what’s going on guys? Jason Capital here and welcome to this special
report I am doing for the Natural Charm Activation System. As you guys know,
we went through all the system, we’ve gone through all the techniques, we’ve
gone through how to be charming, we’ve gone through certain techniques you
can have, certain mentalities, a certain energy, the way you look at her, the way
you talk to her.

We’ve covered all of that, but when it comes to being charming there are
obviously different personalities that women revere as charming. There is my
way of doing it, which is, in my opinion, the most efficient, the easiest way for
you to hang ... for you to really get a handle and start kind of acting out in your
everyday life with women. There are other guys I know, close friends of mine,
who are also very, very charming gentlemen, and they have a slightly different
way of going about it, which is totally fine. We all know that there is more than
one road that leads to the center of town. So what I wanted to do is sit down
with a couple of these specific friends, hand-picked friends of mine, who, in
my opinion, are very, very charming guys and really know how to turn it on
when they need to. I wanted to get their take on it. What their life experiences
have taught them, maybe some stories they’ve had with women, just sharing
their own experiences in a totally informal format.

Today, I’m sitting down with my very good friend and father in another
universe somewhere, David Wygant.

David Wygant: Scary universe, man, if you and I were father and son.

Jason: [laughs]

David: The fun, though, that we would have had. Could you imagine that? If you think

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 about the age difference, I would have had you young, right?

Jason: Mm-hmm.

David: Which means that I would have gotten somebody pregnant, because there
is no chance I was getting married at that time in my life, right? So you would
have been a bastard child, which would have been perfect, right? For Charming
Bastard. Then I probably would have been a half-assed dad, there is no way
in the world that you would have taken away my pussy hunts that I really was
going on in my 20s and 30s. You would have been pissed off at me but you
would have seen what I was all about and you would have been charming and
you would have ...

Jason: But I would have been emotionally closed off to because I had the absentee
dad whose was always out picking up women, which, strangely, would have
made me attractive to women. Pull them in and, I guess I would end up in the
exact same place I am today. [laughs]

David: Yeah, you would have been 14 years old, you would have come to my house,
and you know, your mother would have just gotten mad and just said, “Take
him for two weeks.” I wouldn’t know what to do with you, and all of a sudden,
I would realize, you are 14, you want to meet chicks. So then all of a sudden,
we would bond, right? Then from 14 until now, we would have just cruised,
you know. So all the abandonment issues that I gave you during your early
years were definitely forgotten about because then would just go and chase
pussy together. Especially when we went out to Mexico for your 21st birthday,
I would have taken you to Mexico and we would have hooked up with some
45 year-old, hottest cougar you have ever had in your entire life, it would
have been just so great. We would have fucked sisters and it became like this
incestuous thing.

Jason: That would have been cool.

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David: But that’s in another universe and that is what charm is all about, man, it’s
just laying it on the line and not caring what other people think. That’s what I
always considered charm.

Jason: That’s your definition of charm?

David: Yeah, charm is just knowing who you are and not caring. If you think about it,
we are all wired to be charming. A lot of guys will say I want to be the Alpha
guy, right? Alpha guy. The world is full of Alpha guys, right? Charming Alpha
guys. Can you imagine being at Houston’s on a Friday or Saturday night?
30 Charming Alpha guys waiting to eat? There would be a fist fight, right? To
me, charm is understanding who you are as a person. We all have unique
personalities. We have a friend who is quirky and charming, right? He sits
with a little gray hoodie on all day long but you’ve got to admit he is quirky and
charming. I’ve seen him talk to women and he is very quirky and charming.
We’ve got the deep thinker friend, right? He’s deep thinking and charming. He
will sit in the corner and have his hand on his chin like Abraham Lincoln and
he’ll say one thing and a woman will be like, “Oh my god! That’s the greatest
thing I’ve ever heard.” You and I both are at the top. You and I walk into a
room and we own ... we go for the exact, whatever woman we want, we go
right for her. We don’t stop. It’s like we charm her right from the get go. It’s
different. Charming to me is flirting with your eyes, having great eye contact
at all times, never waiver with your eye contact. It’s having passion in your
voice, no matter who you are. Even if you are a nerd, you have a passion in
your voice about the Dungeon’s and Dragon’s duel that you had Friday night,
and a woman is still going to get excited because she is going to think, this
guy is passionate. We have to break him of his video game habits, but he’s
passionate. Charm is inside you. It’s letting out who you are as a man.

Jason: Mm-hmm. Kind of sharing ... I mean the passion, that’s a huge part. It’s a
constant expression of passion and it’s not, the big thing is, it’s not putting it out
there for any type of reaction or any type of response from the girl, but you’re
putting it out there because you love your shit, you love yourself and you want to

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 put it out there. It feels good because it turns you on, what ever it is. Can you talk
a little bit more about this idea of sharing that passion you feel with your friends
with a woman you are talking to, with the woman that you are trying to attract,
but doing it in a way that’s not necessarily like looking ... you’re not doing it for a
manipulative reason or a specific reason, you are just doing it to do it.

David: I’m not looking for any outcome, ever. I don’t really care what the outcome
is going to be. To me, it’s like, if you think about it, if you live your life as a
charming bastard, what’s going to happen to you? For instance, today, I live
my life as a charming bastard. I go to Cafe Gratitude, I eat there all the time,
they see that’s it’s me and my to go order seems to appear before the person
that was there before me. All of a sudden. The charming bastard gets the food
quicker. I went to get my hair cut. The guy is really cool, I hooked him up with
audio programs, my own audio programs. I hooked him up with it because
he wanted to understand his past relationship and his past programing, so
he gives me a discount. I end up giving it back to him in a tip. He’s smart
because he gives me a discount on the services, because he only gets half
of it, because the store gets the other half, right? But gives me the deal, so in
turn, I give him the bigger tip. Two charming people are working one another.
I go to a hotel and I walk up to somebody, and I’m never thinking about the
outcome, I’m never thinking about what I can get out of somebody, I just
think about making somebody’s day. I think about being the best person I
can possibly be in that present moment and being connected to that present
moment. I walked to a hotel in New York City. I walk up to the front desk,
I was there a few weeks ago, I stayed at this hotel, I’ve never been there
before. I look at them and I say, “I’ve never been here before.” I talk about
what’s on my mind. I’m excited about it. I’ve never been to this hotel before.
The guy looks at me and says, “oh, you’re going to love it.” I said I’m only
going to love it,” right, and I had a smile on my face, “If you give me the quiet
room.” Because I’m one of these people who will get really angry in the night
if I hear my neighbors sneeze between the walls or, you know, I hear cars
honking and whatever else and they gave me like the best corner room on the
5th floor and I slept until, like, noon, in Manhattan. I didn’t hear a thing.

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 It’s all about creating charming people who really like people. That’s what a
charming person does. A charming person really likes people because you
get to learn so much about everybody, and then you become memorable. If
you become memorable you create attraction. If you create attraction, then
women are going to through themselves after you left and right. Because you
are different than these other guys. Most guys want to become charming so
that they can get laid. So they follow one or two of your tips and they forget
about the other eight that you give. They think to themselves, I’m only going
to take Jason’s two tips and that’s all I’m going to need. They forget about he
other eight things as part of the whole structure pattern that you give them.
All of a sudden they go and they try to get laid and it works for a split second
and the woman ... they get a phone number, but the problem is by the time
they call that woman up, the woman realizes she was with someone who was
inauthentic. Charming people have authenticity about them. They are not
looking for anything because they realize they are going to get it by just being
the best version of themselves.

Jason: I think the big thing that you mentioned there is that you are genuinely
interested in people. You are genuinely interested in other people and
connected with other people and sharing fond, playful moments with other
people. What would you say to guys out there who ... The thing is a lot of
guys hear that and they know that to be interesting, it’s important to be more
interested in the person you are talking to, but either they kind of force their
interest in someone else because they want to get something from her, or
they go, “But I’m not interested.” They go, “Why would I be interested in her,
I don’t know anything about her. What’s interesting about her?” How can you
... If you are not a guy who is interested, like genuinely interested in other
people, how can you develop that?

David: Ah, it’s like you almost have to go backwards in time, right, and realize that
when you were a child, you were interested in everything. A little child is
amazing. You know that, you’ve got 10 nieces and nephews and stuff like that,
so you know how cool, and you’ve seen my daughter, you know what they do.

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Jason: Everything is amazing to her.

David: Everything is amazing. It’s like she will look at you, “Do you remember
Jason?”

“Yes, yes, I think I do.” And she looks at you like you are new for the very first
time and it makes you feel good and it makes you engaged with her. So what
I tell guys all the time is like, when you find somebody new, look at them as
a new toy. You have never experienced them before, you are curious about
them. That’s the best thing in the world, to be curious about somebody, right?
So when you are standing there in front of a new woman, instead of you giving
your power away, putting your penis in your hands and handing it over to her,
you become just curious about her. For instance, this is always a great analogy.
I remember I was in a Ralph’s one day and I was just bored, you know, waiting
in line, I hate Ralph’s, you know, because we like Whole Foods, it’s just such a
better experience, right?

Jason: Yeah.

David: Yeah, it is. I went to Ralph’s, I had to get some stuff for the house, right? I
was doing a little barbeque and had to get a few things for the house and
there was this woman in front of me and she takes out of her basket Cap’n
Crunch. I look at her, right, and I say to her, “Is that for you?” Being curious,
right. She goes, “Yes, it is.” I go, “I’ve got to tell you something, I have not
met anybody that ate Cap’n Crunch in our age in a long, long time.” And then,
I said to her, “Remember what it was like?” She goes, “Yeah, you’ve got to
eat it so fast.” She goes, “Yeah you do, otherwise it turns into a contraceptive
sponge.” Because it does, you know, Cap’n Crunch expands, and we had this
conversation about it and I looked at her and I said, “Why?” and she looked at
me and she says, “I’m stoned.” Right? And I started laughing and she’s going,
“Shhh, don’t tell anybody, I played hooky today and I’m stoned and I’m going
to eat Cap’n Crunch.” And I got her phone number, we ended up hanging out.
But the beauty of it is, I was so curious about it and I was so playful and that

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 to me is, that’s what confidence, that’s what charisma, that’s what everything
is based on. That curiosity, that passion that you have for everybody. Who
are you and how can I find out about you because that’s what every woman
wants to know. They want a man that’s interested in them from the get go.
That’s that magic moment that they all look for, to be interested in them right
from the get go.

Jason: And it’s not, it’s not like a dull interest. It’s like a powerful, passionate,
charismatic interest in the other person that you are talking to. I think that’s
really key. But how do you ... a lot of guys, they get into this dating community
and they start learning the wrongs and the rights, right? One of the things
that they hear is never be needy. You can’t be needy, and that’s totally true.
Neediness is probably the most repelling behavior that a man, or a woman,
can portray. How do you be super interested in someone, or very curious, how
do you be extremely curious while at the same time, not giving off any type of
needy vibe. If you are a guy and you are asking all these questions about a
woman, a lot of guys tend to think, well, I’m being needy, I can’t do that.

David: It’s learning your stories and sharing them so you relate to things you have
in common with them, if you think about it, right? One time, ok, I was in
Whole Foods, ok, in line, people will think, oh my god, he only meets people
in the supermarket. No, because you go to the supermarket every single
day, for some odd reason you like fresh food, right? So I remember I was
in line and this woman had sushi, she had potato chips, and then she had
like a vegetable juice. I looked at her and I said, “That’s one hell of a food
combination.” with a smile on my face. I said, “Let me guess, potato chips
first, sushi when you get home, vegetable juice in the morning.” She goes,
“You’re right!” I said, “Yeah, that’s like my same routine.” Whenever I go into
... I always have to have a bag of chips, I used to have a bag of chips, always
got to have this bag of chips when I’m driving home from the market. When
I was a little kid, my mom used to send me to Peter and Sons, this Italian
bakery, this great bakery that just smelled, the whole street smelled like fresh
Italian bread. My mom would always give me enough money, but she would

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 always give me extra money for one Italian loaf of my own because I would
eat it on my way home. It’s a two mile ride home and I would be able to eat
the whole thing on the way home. She goes, “Oh my god, I used to do the
same thing.” She goes, “I’ve been a carb person my whole life.” That, to me,
is not needy. You are sharing it. What a needy guy does, is he looks at a
woman, looks at the same thing and goes into Larry King interview mode and
then says, “So, I see you have potato chips. Are those your favorite?” The
woman goes, “Yes”

“I like potato chips, too. Is that sushi?” She goes, “Yes”

“I like wasabi on my sushi, what about you?” She goes, “Yes”

“That’s great. Vegetable juice, I used to juice, how about you? Oh, that’s right,
you juice, do you like sushi?” He keeps going back to the same three things,
right, and what happens is she looks at him and goes this guy is needy, this
guy is very insecure, this is the type of guy that if I went out with him, in a
relationship, he won’t trust me if I get a call, he would suffocate me, he’s too
nervous. Needy people tend to not share stories because they are always so
afraid, they play it safe. Because a needy person needs that woman in their
life so they monitor the conversation. Me, and you, we don’t care. I don’t care.
I don’t care, I’m telling a story about Peter and the Italian bakery and if she
doesn’t like the story and it doesn’t relate to her, then basically, I’m learning
right there in that moment that she is somebody that won’t connect with me
because I like to tell grandiose stories. I like to connect with women on a very,
on a deeper, higher level. I want to give a portion of me there. A needy guy
never gives himself away. He always plays it safe and goes into Larry King
interview mode. A confident guy will always give something of himself away
because a woman will go out with a confident guy that gave the Peter and Sons
story because she’s going to look at that guy and go, wow, that guy is so cool,
he shared a story. She knows something about you. She trusts a man that
shares something about himself. She distrusts a man that goes into interview
mode. You know that most beginners and newbies are strict interviewers.

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Jason: What they are doing is when they are in that situation and they are doing the
‘is that your favorite kind of chip’ or ‘why do you like chips so much’. Let’s talk
more about chips. Have you ever noticed the rigidness of the Ruffle vs the
smoothness of the Pringle? They’re asking questions because they think they
don’t know what to say but really it’s that they’re not comfortable just openly
sharing all those little anecdotes and opinions and thoughts and comments
that they have, this is what probably got me started doing this, I don’t know
if I ever told you this, but that got me really obsessed with the whole male
female thing is when I was 19 or 20 years old, when I first stopped playing
college basketball and I’m at Michigan State University, I’m going to college
parties for the first time in my life. I’m going out with my friends who have
been going to the parties for years. I would watch them go up to girls and they
are chatting with girls and they are laughing and flirting and I thought, that’s
awesome, I want to do that. Whenever I would talk to a girl, I would be the
most boring guy ever. I would sit there and I wouldn’t know what to say. That
is what I told myself so I would sit there and ask stupid questions about things
that I wasn’t interested in just so that I would have something to say. What I
realized, was that it wasn’t that I didn’t know what to say, it’s that I distrusted
everything my instincts told me to say. I didn’t trust myself to say whatever the
fuck i wanted. Instead, I would end up talking about things I had no interest in.

So when there is a guy at the supermarket talking to some girl about potato
chips and he’s asking her what kind of dip she likes and you know, the most
boring questions, why that’s so disgusting to David and to me adnd to that girl
is that he’s clearly not saying or talking about anything he wants to. He’s not
... if you are a guy out there and you are asking girls these boring questions
like what do you do and where are you from and all the interview shit, you
are not talking about things you are actually interested in. No one gives
a fuck what her favorite chip is. There is no way you actually give a fuck,
when you first meet a girl, if that’s her favorite chip, you don’t care. There
are more important things to talk about, there’s more passionate things you
want to talk about, there’s deeper things you want to talk about. There is all
this observation and comments and stories that are going on in your mind

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 that you want to share, and you are not giving any of those. Instead you are
staying on this one safe subject that you don’t care about, that you know she
is bored by. Why would you ever want to talk about things like that. Instead,
you want to be sharing off the cuff. Saying what you want. Lower the bar for
what is acceptable to say. There is no bar. You can just let it roll. Because
what happens is, when you start letting it roll, you start getting really freewith
your conversation, you start getting really energetic.

Literally, when we stared this interview, I was really laid back and now I’m
talking more. I’m getting more into it and that’s what happens when you are
talking to a girl. You start saying what you want, you start being free, you
start expressing yourself and making little comments or making little jokes
about whatever you want or making little predictions about what kind of food
she has and you say she eats this one first and this one second and then
she decides whether she wants to eat the ice cream or not because she’s
watching her weight but she has this internal battle.

You play with it and that’s you actually sharing and talking about the things
and the ideas and the jokes that you want to talk about and that to me is how
you are extremely curious about someone without being needy. That’s how
you are charming. That is charming.

If you were to remember a time that you were talking to someone and they
were really interested in you, but it wasn’t like they needed anything from you,
it was just like a free flowing conversation but you could tell there was passion
behind what they were saying and energy, they were interested. You left that
conversation going man, that’s a charming person, I like that person. We have
a friend, actually, who I think does this better than anyone, I’d love to hear
your take on him personally, but I think Josh Pellicer, when he wants to, wants
to be normal ... I think he is phenomenal at ... he always has this high energy
about him and he’s always really interested in what you’ve got going on.

David: When he’s normal.

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Jason: When he’s normal. Not always.

David: When he is normal, he is really charming, he makes me feel good. Like, when
he is normal, he will tell you, how have you been, you know, and he listens.
He hasn’t been that way in a long time. The old version of him was pretty
amazing, as a person. The new version is just, I don’t know. You can combine
them both and ...

Jason: It’s a phase.

David: It’s a phase, and you can see the phase, but he was very authentic and
I’ll share a really funny story. There’s two stories that changed my life. I
remember I was 20, it was the year I turned 23 or 24, right? I was living in
Manhattan and I remember I got a job, a job you would love, too. I got fired
from every job I got out of college for like the first year and a half. I had an
attitude problem. I did. I couldn’t give a shit about their companies. I just
wanted to go and meet women. I was working in Manhattan for the first time,
I wanted to go to Bloomingdales and check out the make-up girls. They were
hot. So when I got fired, I needed a gig and a friend of mine hooked me up
in Bloomingdales to be a perfume sprayer. Best job I ever had. I stood there
all day long and basically flirted with women. I got nine phone numbers at the
end of day one. The ninth phone number was a woman that I absolutely fell
for. We fell in love and we were together for three months and it just didn’t
work out. We were from different sides of the path, she was from Brooklyn,
she was like Bay Ridge, Saturday Night Fever girl, you know, like real Italian,
New York, and I was this fucking city guy and we ended up breaking up
because I ended up almost cheating on her and i told her and of course you
never do that. I didn’t cheat on her but she reacted in a negative way and I
remember I was really upset one day and I was riding the subway home and I
sat next to this hot redhead, older woman, and I’m just going like this, pulling
my hair out. I look at her and I go, man, I’ve had such a shit day and she
says, “Why?” and I said, “I don’t know. My girlfriend broke up with me, she
thinks I cheated on her.” and I just wanted to talk, right? SO we talked.

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 She took me back to her house and fucked me all night long. It’s something
that I realized. Expressing who you are in the moment is so not what
everybody expects. It’s like it’s a dream come true to women is a guy that is
expressive about where he is in the present moment, whether it’s good bad or
indifferent or anything. I’ve done that to women all the time.

I remember one night I went up to a group of women sitting at the bar and I
said I’ve been watching you for two hours, all of you are blowing guys off but
all of you are looking to get laid because I see the way that you are looking
at men, I see the way you are looking at their groins. It’s fucking comical to
watch. You, the blond over there, you are dying to get laid because you are
looking at more men than ever before but you can’t find anybody that really
attracts you because most of these guys have no game. The brunette in the
middle? You are just basically going to fuck anybody because I watched you
fall all over that old guy. I just labeled each of them and they sat there and
looked at me and they go, time out. I go what? They go holy shit, you’re right,
and the conversation was unreal.

It’s like freedom to say what you want, and that’s what, going back to Josh,
Josh always had the freedom to say what he wants, when he wasn’t a
nut. You do the same thing and I do the same thing. We give ourselves
permission. What a lot of these guys who are listening don’t do, they don’t
give themselves permission to say what they want. When you play it safe in
life, you never get what you want. If you are a quarterback in the NFL and you
play it safe, guess what usually happens? Interception, right?

Jason: Tru dat.

David: Look at, let’s look at the 2013 Super Bowl. To this day, Harbaugh had three
plays inside the five yard line and didn’t run once. He played it safe. He went
and threw the ball and threw the ball and didn’t run once. He didn’t run one
time and that’s what people do. They get into what is a pressure packed
situation and for a lot of these guys, meeting a woman is a pressure packed

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 situation, so instead of just being the fun person that they are, they have to
play it safe and they throw the ball three times. Three bad passes in a row.
Then they get into their heads and the think to themselves this isn’t going to
work, this doesn’t work, and then six months pass by and they just go into
lala-ville and their just home using the KY jelly every night, checking out
internet porn, fucking stroking their cock, fucking dumping a load, fucking
feeling like a loser. It’s like, it doesn’t work. Eventually you are going to have
to say to yourself I’m not going to play it safe. You’re going to have fun. I
think the key is, and you know this, is like pick three places that you can be
charismatic, that you can have the personality. That’s why you and I always
laugh and go Whole Foods is the best. You will call me up and be like, let’s go
to Whole Foods.

Jason: All the time.

David: Let’s go hunting and have fun in the aisles of the Whole Foods. Let’s go to
the farmer’s market. It’s like, pick three places where you can actually relate
to women and get good at those places. Forget about the other places. Just
because your friends going to a big barbeque and you suck at them, don’t
go to it. Only go where you are good and you will see your whole social life
change.

Jason: That’s great, yeah, and you don’t always have to stick to those three places but
you get really fucking good in those places and then you can take it anywhere.
Then home court advantage, enemy territory, it doesn’t matter, you’re still
fucking awesome because you develop, it takes about a month, but you
develop that character. To me I really, I think the key to being charming is that
conversational freedom. It’s giving yourself that permission to say what you
want, whenever you want, whatever situation you are in. To me, that was like
... you want to get to the core of why I do what I do, it’s to have that freedom.
That’s like the most important thing in the world to me, is that.

Is that no matter where I am or who I’m with, it doesn’t matter what other people

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 are expecting of the social etiquette, I don’t care about any of that. I want to be
able to express myself exactly how I feel and if I want to say fucked up things
and say raunchy sex jokes or swear or cuss or scream, whatever it is, I give
myself permission and freedom to do that. I think people walk away from the
situation ... some people will go damn, that guy is crazy, he’s out of his mind,
but most of them walk away, they really recognize, I think, two things. Number
one is that he’s different, right? Because you know as well as I that 99% of
people out there do not say what they are thinking about in any situation. They
are always bullshitting, they are always playing to etiquette, they are always
trying to tell the other person not what they want to express but what they think
the other person wants to hear which is funny because I don’t care who you
are, you HAVE NO IDEA what the other person wants to hear so stop giving a
fuck about that and go back to expressing yourself freely however you want,
just like you did when you were a young, free kid ...

David: They are living in fear.

Jason: Yeah, it’s bullshit. It’s all bullshit, and when they meet ... a girl meets someone,
meets a man that doesn’t have that, and he’s just boom, he’s just out there
and he’s just spitting whatever he wants to, that in itself is incredibly attractive,
because he is free. He is not shackled by society. He’s free in his expression,
his communication, and that’s incredibly attractive, that’s charming.

David: I was in the market one time, a farmer’s market, with my daughter, and this
hot girl was just watching me and my daughter, my daughter’s beautiful,
holding her hand, playing around ...

Jason: Playing it up, yeah, of course.

David: You know, gave her a kiss, right, put her down. She looks at me and says,
“You’re wonderful with her.” and I looked at her and said, “I’m even more
wonderful with you.” I said, “But right now I’m with my daughter and there is
nothing I can do about it.”

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Jason: Nice.

David: So it’s like, I looked at her and said, “I’m more wonderful with you.” and she
looks at me and she starts giggling and laughing and it was just that ballsy
thing because I saw the way she was checking me out. It’s like, I called her out
and she liked it because it’s like a confidence thing. It’s charming to call them
out, it’s their dream. It’s like, I wasn’t born this way, I had to teach myself just
like you had to teach yourself. I had to go and painfully learn how to do this. I
remember when I was 23 years old, I walked the streets of Manhattan with my
Walkman on, yeah ok, I’m dating myself a little bit, and I observed what people
were doing and for like two weeks I just made observations, right, and then I’d
practice in front of the mirror at home, I did all that stuff, right? Race you across
the street, let’s do it again, race you across the street, and I did it with a smile. I
know you’ve been there.

Jason: I do that shit, of course. I still do shit like that.

David: Yeah, or I’d look at them go, “Nice hair.” And then I thought, I’m going to go
out and everything that I did for the next two weeks was just everything I
observed, I was going to use words with. So all of a sudden a woman would
be impatient looking at her watch and I’d be like, “Oh my god, oh my god,
change, change, quickly” I would say anything like, “Hurry light, change,
I’ll race you.” And like I remember everything started working and then I
remember one time, like the challenges that you do to yourself, like the next
time, like I know you guys are going to relate to this. The next time I see that
gym girl, I’m going to go talk to her. How many times have you said that to
yourself? The next time, I’m going to go talk to her. So finally, there was this
girl Bonnie that worked out at my gym on 73rd, 75th and Broadway, and there
it was, there she was. I’m thinking oh man, this is the next time, here we go,
and for six months I didn’t talk to her. I made every excuse in the book not to
talk to her. SO of course, what do I do? I stare at her the whole time, I don’t
talk to her, she starts walking down the steps and I’m like, this is the next time
and I think to myself, what’s it going to hurt if I go talk to her right now? This is

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 the next time, I want to get over this next time mentality. I run down the steps,
here I am on Broadway in Manhattan, like a sailor, like looking at the seven
seas with my hand over my eyes, looking around, and all of a sudden there
she is, she’s walking and I run after her. I tap her on the shoulder and she
goes, “What?” right, and she smiles because she’s seen my in the gym.

So I go alright, and I told her exactly, “I’ve seen you here so many times, I’ve
never talked to you and I’ve felt like a complete idiot and today I woke up this
morning and thought to myself maybe the girl is going to be in the gym and I
said to myself, this is the next, the next time I’m going to go talk to you.” She
starts cracking up and she says, “You got a pen?” I said no, she said, “Hold on
a second.” She reaches into her purse, rights down her number and Bonnie
and we ended up sleeping together two weeks later. I mean it’s like, and she
was so flattered by it and when we went out on a date she looked at me and
she goes, “You were this maniac coming after me on the street, you were just
so cute and so real.”

You know, and I did it and it was authentic and that’s what charming is. It’s
about being authentic. Even if you are nervous, and I tell shy guys this all the
time, walk up to a woman and say to her, “I noticed you from a distance and
I really want to talk to you, I’m just not good at this whole thing. I’m not really
great, this isn’t my forte to come up with something really clever.”

You can use that, that can be your story, your opener, and she will look at
you and she will be so honored and she’ll be like hi, my name is Jane, what’s
yours, and you can have a great conversation with her and you will realize
that they are equally as screwed up as you. They equally have demons
and they are equally as uncharming and they are equally as nervous, so
somebody has to make the first move and in society, being a man, you are
expected to make the first move. If you keep waiting for a woman to make
the move, you are going to be 90 years-old with your socks up to your knees,
your pants up to your chest, and you haven’t been laid since you were sixty.

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Jason: Mm-hmm, and it’s fun. That’s the best part about it is once you make that shift
from kind of worrying about what you are going to say, thinking about what
you are going to say, to the shift to now I just say whatever the fuck I want to
say, outcomes be gone, outcomes don’t matter, I’m about the enjoyment of the
process of hearing myself say whatever the fuck was on my brain and then
putting it out there for the world. That is what I’m all about, that shit turns me
on, that’s what I like. When you start doing that, you are going to ... it’s just so
much fun, it’s so freeing and it’s so much fun. It becomes addictive to just say
whatever the fuck you are thinking, all the time, where ever you are, with who
ever it is that you are with.

David: It’s so much fun, it’s like the most freeing experience in the world because
we all have it inside of us because we are all just little kids inside of us. We
are all little boys inside of us so it’s about time you screamed. It’s about time
you said what was on your mind, it’s about time you stopped trying to find the
most perfect thing to say and just start saying what is perfect. Here is the key,
Jason and I can go out and we can have ten of you guys and we can all go
out together and entire weekend and let me tell you something, one woman’s
going to like me and one woman’s going to like Jason and one woman’s
going like you, and you know what, you aren’t going to know until you open
your mouth and you got to open your mouth at all times because whether
you are a nerd and you are not an Alpha male, you’re a Beta male, whatever
the terms are, it doesn’t matter. Your personality is inside you, if you don’t let
it out, nobody is ever going to notice you are there. Just practice. Just one
day, go up to a woman and say whatever you feel, literally. As long as it’s
not crude and disgusting and say nice tits or something like that, but go up
to a woman and go, you’re beautiful, if you think she is beautiful. But mean
it from your heart, make it authentic, make it real. Have good eye contact.
Have the passion in your voice that you and I are having.. Have the tonality of
a confident man. It doesn’t matter if it’s the first time you say it. The first time
you say anything is going to be nerve wracking. After that, it just gets easier
and easier and easier, but you’ve got to start doing it because the excuses
are getting really old.

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Jason: Mm-hmm, and the thing is, you guys, if you have been learning from other
people out there, you’ve been studying dating information or whatever, you’ve
heard the adage don’t give a woman a compliment, right? Don’t compliment a
woman, and the reason that was ever taught is because the guys who would try
that, when they would compliment a woman, it wasn’t real. They didn’t feel it.

They would say to a woman, you know, you’re really pretty, what’s your name,
or your really pretty. It was like there was no feeling behind it, there was no
passion. There was a reaction seeking element behind it. They were saying it
to get a certain response from a woman. They were like, ok, I told you you were
pretty, now can we go fuck? That’s what they thought was going to happen but
what David’s talking about here, which is ... you know, I used to tell guys not
to compliment women until I actually tried it authentically myself from my core
and I noticed what actually happened which was really effective, is you say it
with passion, you say it with meaning, you say it with feeling in that moment,
you say, “ God, I literally just saw you across the street and you are literally
amazing, I had to come meet you, what is your name?” When you say it like
that and you actually mean it, she doesn’t even hear the words, she doesn’t
hear the compliment. All she hears is that energy and that eye contact that you
are bringing. You’re just like boom, I’m here for you, who are you? That takes
her completely out of the world and into the moment with you and it’s like you
guys are in this world now where it’s like ... it’s instant attraction is what it is.

David: I did a challenge one day and it was a blast. I just went out one day and I was
going to compliment everybody and anybody. Dudes, kids, whatever, and it
was fun. It was like an old lady just still feeling alive at her age, walking across
the street. Anything I could think of. If I couldn’t find a compliment, I would give,
right, because I wasn’t going to just do it to anybody, I had to feel something.
So finally, I was doing it for like eight hours, I was just having such a good time
and I was just driving my car, went into the car wash, and this woman at the
car wash was just sitting there and she looks like a fucking vision of beauty. So
I walked up to her and I’m like, “You are like a vision of beauty at the end of a
long day, it’s ridiculous.” I said, “I expected just to look at cars and dudes and

Unleashing Your Natural Charm 19

 that was like my compliment, was the whole thing. She looked at me, we had
dinner that night, it was the greatest night. I mean, she was like, she looked
at me and was like, “Oh my god, you’re so full of life.” Because I saw not just
her beauty but the beauty of the guys, the Mexican guys cleaning the cars
and how they were supporting their families. She just saw so many sides of
me, like instantly, she was turned on because I was confident enough to tell
her about the beauty but I was so in tune with my environment because when
you compliment people all day long, everything becomes clear, when you are
authentic and real and you actually see this.

Jason: Mm-hmm, and the key point, because guys can do this and it won’t work for
them the way it worked for you, and the difference I see every time with the
guys is that when you were doing it, you were not doing it for anything from
her. You were not seeking anything.

David: Nothing.

Jason: Nothing. You literally ... and I talk about tonality but there is two major types of
tonality that guys talk with. They can have the more seeking rapport tonality
where the voice kind of goes up and you know, “You’re just like a vision of
beauty, what is your name? I need to know you.” And it’s kind of like that tonality
goes up and she can feel that there is some type of reaction seeking with you.
But when you come in and you don’t want anything, and you’ll do this naturally,
you don’t actually want anything from a woman, your voice is going to have a
more neutral to downward, breaking rapport tone, it’s going to kind of go down.
So when you see her, it’s not like, “You are like a vision of beauty.” It’s more like,
“You know, you are a vision of beauty, what is your name?” She can feel that
you are not seeking anything from her. That you are saying it because you felt
it and you are one of those dudes who takes risks and you just say whatever
the fuck you want and she can sense that right away and she’s attracted to that,
always. That’s a universally attractive behavior.

David: If you seek nothing, you get everything. The old saying in life. Lend a friend

Unleashing Your Natural Charm 20

 a thousand dollars, you get back ten thousand. You seek nothing, right? If
you seek nothing in life, come on, you fight, everybody fights it all but every
spiritual guru in the world tells you this, the law of attraction, blah, blah, blah.
Seek nothing and get everything back. I seek absolutely nothing. Why is
somebody like you and I, we can always have, we can have a girlfriend a
month, we can have a girlfriend every six months. I’ve never had an issue
finding a girlfriend because I seek nothing. I just seek, I seek nothing, all day
long, I don’t want anything.

Jason: But you give everything. Right, you give everything but you seek nothing.

David: Right, I give everything all day long. From the second I wake up in the
morning, I am so happy. I wake up in the morning, I’m happy. I don’t like
getting out of bed, it takes me a good hour to out of bed, but I am very
appreciative of my day. I don’t expect anything, I have no anxiety over my
day. You’ll never here me say I had a stressful day because I don’t believe
in that. It’s like we were talking to begin this thing, how come you and I can
work four hours a day and get stuff it takes people ten hours a day done. It’s
because we are seeking nothing. We don’t think to ourselves ... people spend
ten hours a day because they are seeking the payoff. Oh god, I’ve got to
make a million dollars this year with this company, right, and it’s like the whole
day is in that gray area like oh fuck, will this move make me all the money.
You and I go and we look at our work and say, alright, I got to get all this stuff
done. We seek nothing, we get everything.

Jason: And we don’t give to get, we give because we enjoy the sharing and the
giving and self-entertaining and wanting nothing in return, when you are
talking to a woman and we say give everything and seek nothing from
her, it’s not ... you’re not giving her just compliment after compliment after
compliment. That’s not giving her, because when you do that you are actually
... uh, I can’t think of the word right now, you’re overwhelming her with too
much pressure, you’re not giving her good emotions in that case, you’re just
being a little bitch who’s giving away all his power on a silver platter. That’s

Unleashing Your Natural Charm 21

 not what giving is. When we say giving, to me it’s giving her that gift of being
in the presence of a masculine, free-thinking, free-speaking, non-reaction
seeking kind of guy. Like the guy whose just like, he’s telling her how beautiful
she is and thenhe’s cracking jokes about her and he’s teasing her a little
bit because women love to laugh at themselves, that’s a gift you give her.
So it’s more about finding that version of you that is that most personable,
charismatic, version, and giving it. Fully.

David: I love giving. I mean giving is what the key to life is. The more you give, the
more you get, the more you never have to ask. Then, when you are in a
relationship, the more you give to somebody, then when you ask, for your own
needs, they will give them to you, because you give to somebody. So needs
are important. Needy is bad, needs are important.

Jason: All these things that we are talking about here, these are all the
characteristics that go into what makes a guy a “charming bastard”. You know,
when someone walks away from a conversation, they talk to me or David, a
lot of times, they literally say to themselves, that’s a charming bastard right
there and it’s because we live these characteristics. This is not something that
we do, they are things that we are. They are ingrained into us, they are a part
of our programing now. One last thing before we finish up here I want to get
your opinion on is the idea of someone who is very charming has a, they have
a very keen sense of what they other person is feeling and they can adapt
to that, right? They are not emotionally unaware of what the other person
is feeling. They have that emotional acuity of what’s going on. Can you talk
about that for a second?

David: It’s because they listen. In order to find that emotional, you know, to connect
to someone emotionally, you connect to their, you listen to them. You are not
talking at people, you are talking to them. You are not lecturing them, but you
are enlightening them and you listen to what they have to say. The key to life is
listening. The most charming people are the best listeners, not people who can
just talk, because those are talkers. Talkers talk the talk but don’t walk the walk.

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 You want to talk the talk, walk the walk, and be charming, you listen. All the
information that you need about somebody is what they say to you. Charming
people, or charming bastards, if you want to put it that way, will listen very
carefully to what someone says and feel what they needs to say, because
we all do it intuitively but we all ignore it and actually be able to continue that
conversation more. When a woman opens up to you and they open up like a
flower and it’s beautiful, it’s like a key moment when they say, “God, I used to
love when I was a kid an I ate Cap’n Crunch.”

What do you love about being a kid? A charming person will always take
her words and send it right back at her and and take her deeper, on a more
emotional journey, and that’s the key to conversation, is taking those words,
going deeper into it, but it’s listening. If you don’t listen, the problem is most
guys are always anticipating. You know, what can I say next. I don’t know what
I’m going to say next, ever, that’s the future, you don’t ever know, no one can
ever tell you what to say next. There is no scripted conversation out there that’s
ever going to work for you. So you’ve got to listen. The key to life is listening.
If you listen, you become charming. The better listener you are, the more
charming you are going to be.

Jason: Mm-hmm, and it’s not just listening to what she’s saying, but it’s what she’s
saying. It’s her eyes, her body language ...

David: What she’s feeling, and don’t even worry about her body language because
if your body language is strong, her body language will mimic yours. You
know, I never tell guys all the time, that’s why I’ve never done a full body
language product because there is no point to it because guys are going to
get into their heads even more. She flipped her hair over to the left hand side.
Well, it’s because she’s got a cowlick. You know, it doesn’t mean she wants
to blow you, she’s got a cowlick. Because if your body language is strong ...
a charming bastard has great body language, his head is like a string being
pulled up to the ceiling and his posture is strong and he can feel every muscle
in his body and he can feel the way he walks, you know, and he knows his

Unleashing Your Natural Charm 23

 eye contact is good and it’s direct and he sucks a woman in and he’s got
great charismatic hands that can talk, it’s just ... you’re charming, you are
full of life. That’s what a charming person does. You don’t worry about the
other person because a charming person is a leader not a follower. A man
that worries about a woman’s body language is a follower and he’s a needy
bastard, not a charming bastard.

Jason: Before we finish up her, David, is there anything else that you want to add that
goes into becoming a more charming human being, and more charming man?
Anything else you think we haven’t covered?

David: No, except just be patient with yourself. Allow yourself to fail because in life,
failure does not ... to me failure is great. When you fail it means you actually
made an attempt. Never use the word I can’t. Never use the word I try. Every
single day, if you need help, ask for it. It’s not a bad thing to need help. It’s not
a bad thing to be critiqued. It’s not a bad thing to get coached. It’s not a bad
thing to send an email to somebody. It’s not a bad thing to ever reach out for
help. The most successful people know the magic word is help.

Jason: Mm-hmm, and ask. That’s the number one secret to getting help with what
ever it is that you need, is ask.

David: You ask.

Jason: It doesn’t make you a lesser person, it makes you a bolder, greater person,
because you are willing to put yourself and your ego on the line when you do
that.

David: A stronger person. Weak people don’t ask. They spend all their days in their
gray whole. In their little cubicle, all day long with their hoodie up and they
never ask and what happens is, all of a sudden, they look at somebody and
they finally ask for help but they’ve been in their head for five or six ...

Unleashing Your Natural Charm 24

Jason: Five years later they realize that they are unhappy.

David: Ten years.

Jason: Or an entire lifetime.

David: They wake up and they are 33 years old and they think what the hell
happened in the last 11 years since I got out of college. You know, I’ve been
wearing this hoodie every single day.

Jason: So don’t let that happen to you, alright? Alright, so that will do it for this audio
report here between Jason Capital and David Wygant. David, thank you so
much for being here and giving, just like you talk about you do. You just give
and give and we highly appreciate it, man. So we will talk to you guys later.

Unleashing Your Natural Charm 25