Philosophical Reflection Paper

I have many experiences in life about encountering people, events, even

ideas. But the experience that kept in my mind is about this event which is taking
CET in WMSU. I Didn't passed the examination and it's really hurtful for me, I
don't know what to feel that time when the result got released and I saw many of
my classmates got excited because they've passed the examination. What I knew
was it prevents me from shedding tears in front of many people. Even me I was so
disappointed to myself. I can't handle anymore or prevent my tears from falling
because I felt so heavy so I decided to go out and find another place where I can
cry. I play the song Still (worship song) to lessen the discouragement. I cried that
day a lot at first I can't even accept the fact the reality I just don't know what to say
to my parents/ family. I knew their expectations to me was high, but then I got
them disappointed. When I went home my mother ask me she said "I saw the
result" and I replied nothing then she spoke again its ok we can find another way. I
was about to cry again that time but I prevent it. What hurt me the most is my
brother kept on saying me that "sige ayan punta pa ng late" and many more. I was
just "ow okay I learned my lesson naman " but what I need is comfort not sermon.
Well, I can't blame them because it was really my fault in the first place. I arrived
late during the exam, and it drives me to feel time pressured.

Time, days, month passes by, it was enrollment already in WMSU. I still tried to
come and ask for other course if there is available if I can enroll even my CET
score is not passing. Seriously, for me it was the very challenging year. I fought
every single day to wake up and find new hope even I felt very hopeless already. I
can't count how many times I went in school just to confirm if there's a course
available for those not CET passers, I was still hoping that there is. Later on, when
a teacher confront that the Dean didn't accept in the course of Food tech. I was so
disappointed again, but then she said there's another course that maybe can accept,
after that i went there with my friend who has the same situation with me. The
teacher said she will just call us if the Dean will accept. After a days, there's many
things running in my mind because my family says that I'll just stop for the mean
time and wait for another CET next year which is this year. That time I don't know
what to say and feel or decide, because for me I don't want to stop but later on I
decided to beg a sign from God.

I says if the teacher calls and says the dean approves it I will continue, but if he
says opposite I won't continue anymore. Then the date arrives when I was
expecting the teacher's call. My phone rang and I answered it. He said the Dean
approves it. I feel excited but he calls again and Said there's a problem “binawi
daw ng Dean” hmmm, so I don't know any more what to decide, then after an hour.
He calls again and said we'll go there as soon as possible because, the dean
Accepted/approves it again already. My feelings get confuse because "why?" Is
this the real sign? I don't know what to feel but we went there ahead to pass the
requirements.

Even though I entered in the course that wasn't my dream course, I still accepted it
because I'll just shift in the next school year. But this time I need to love this
course for me not feel sad and still make an effort to learned those lessons in that
course. I learned my lesson with my experienced. I learned not to go late during
important event specifically if its examination. I learned that failing is not the
definition of who you are, I learned that it's ok to fail for me to do more or for me
to make change and strive harder, I learned that in every Circumstances there is
hope, I learned that don't be just complacent I need to do more so that I can learn
more.

I'm thankful that all this things happened because it makes me more stronger and
face my fears in life. I found how to be Still in our Heavenly Father no matter
what, I felt ok after all but there are times that I can't avoid to think that if I passed
the CET maybe I don't have a problem now. Well, I can't blame myself too
because I know God gave me a lesson. And I know he has a better plan for me, I
just need to hold on because everything happens for a reason. Day by day is such a
wonderful day if we just look on the positive side. But don't be afraid to feel not
ok, because that feeling will make you stronger and will make u a better version of
yourself.