What Is Love?

• What exactly is love?

• Defining different definitions of love?
• What is the true meaning of love, according to the Bible
• History of love
• Elements of love
• What love is not
• 12 signs of love
• 8 types of love
• Impact of being in love
• Love and mental health

A relationship is composed of friendship, sexual attraction, intellectual

compatibility, and, of course, love. Love is the glue that keeps a
relationship strong and solid. It is deeply biological. But what is
love, and how do you know if you are truly in love?
It is difficult to define love because everyone’s perception of real love can
be dramatically different. People often get confused between lust,
attraction, and companionship. Hence, there is no one best definition of
love.

However, love can be summarized as an intense feeling of euphoria and

deep affection for someone or something. This love definition or love
meaning might not encompass all the emotions that comprise how it feels
when you are in love.

Is love an emotion? Yes.

Can abstract emotions such as love be defined in specific terms? Maybe

not.

However, there are certain words and actions that fall in the realm of love,
while others do not.

Some gestures can be termed love. On the other hand, some other
emotions and feelings can be confused for love, but people soon realize
that they are not true love. Here is to understanding more about love and
the feeling.

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What exactly is love?

If you want to define love in one sentence, love is one of the most
profound emotions humans experience. It is a combination of attraction
and closeness. The person we feel attracted or close to is the person we
are, usually, in love with.

Such a person can be a friend, parent, siblings, or even our pet. Such love
is based on a feeling of attraction or affection.

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Defining different definitions of love?

Love can be defined in different ways because there are different types of
love. The answer to the question, “What is love for you?” can differ for
everyone, depending on the relationship in context.

As per the Cambridge dictionary, love is defined as liking

another adult very much and
being romantically and sexually attracted to them or
having strong feelings of liking a friend or person in your family.

While this is a more literal definition of the word, love can be defined in
many other ways.

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How to describe love?
Feelings of love can be defined as an amalgamation of various other
emotions. Love is caring, compassion, patience, not being jealous, not
having expectations, giving yourself and other people a chance, and not
rushing.

What is love, then? You ask. Love has most often been used as a noun, but
in practice, love is a verb. It is about what we do for others and the many
ways we make other people feel loved and cared for.

What is the true meaning of

love, according to the Bible
As per John 15:9-10, “As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you:
continue you in my love. If you keep my commandments, you shall abide
in my love; even as I have kept my Father’s commandments, and abide in
his love.”

If you set boundaries and abide by them, there is nothing purer and holier
than love. Like God had made certain rules to adhere to, if we do, he loves
us absolutely, completely. This is the meaning of ‘what is love.’
According to the Bible, love is pristine and sanctimonious.

However, the first love mentioned in the Bible is not romantic, but
paternal love (Genesis 22.) It refers to the unconditional actions that a
mother or father is willing to perform for their child. This is also where the
idea of love being an action comes into play.

History of love
Just like most things around the world, love has also seen a transformation
over the years and centuries. Love was not always the way we know it
now.

Back in the day, love was secondary or not even under consideration when
it came to a union between two people. Marriages, which in some cultures
and parts of the world are known as the ultimate goal of a romantic
relationship, were mostly transactional.

People married based on whether or not the marriage would bring them
any benefits in terms of wealth and power.

However, if we look at forms of art such as poetry, it seems that love is an

old emotion – something people have been experiencing for a long time.

Elements of love
Love is a holistic feeling. It involves many elements, words,, and actions
which define love. “What is love, and what isn’t?” is a very common
question we can find ourselves asking.

Many people may wonder what is the meaning of love in a relationship.

The answer lies in the elements of love.

1. Care
Care is one of the primary elements of love.

If we love someone, we care about them, their feelings, and their well-
being. We may go out of our way to make sure they are okay, and even
compromise and sacrifice our needs and wants to give them what they
need.

2. Admiration
Admiration is very crucial in love and relationships.

Admiration can be for their physicality or even for their mind and
personality. Liking someone for their external and internal self and
respecting their thoughts is an essential element of love.

3. Desire
Desire is both sexual and physical and mental.

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Just wanting to spend more time with someone, being around them, and
wanting them – are all parts of the desire you feel when you are in love
with someone.

What love is not

As we discuss the elements of love and what is love, it is also important to

know what love is not.

We can often confuse some other emotions or feelings for love, but sooner
or later, we realize that what we feel for a certain person is not love.

▪ Love is not lust

Despite the phrase “it was love at first sight,” love is not something we
feel right away.
That strong feeling of attraction, like a magnet pulling you towards that
person you’ve just met? That’s infatuation and sexual chemistry.

Mother nature gives us a big dose of infatuation to get us together

initially.

Love does include sexual chemistry, but it differs because it is an emotion

that takes time to build. Lust can appear in an instant; love evolves over a
period of time as you get to know the other person inside and out.

▪ A relationship does not mean you are in love

You may be immensely sexually attracted to your partner, but that does
not mean you understand the true definition of love.

If you haven’t developed a base of loving feelings with your partner, you
will become bored once the sexual spark dies down.

▪ Love is not instant

How to explain love and relationship?

A loving relationship is not built in a day. The threads of love take time to
weave together to form a strong bond.

It is only as you and your partner share your thoughts, fears, dreams, and
hopes that love takes root. So, trust the process and don’t rush love. It has
its own timetable that needs to be respected and not hurried.
 ▪ The one true love
We talk about soul mates, but humans are built with the capacity to love
over and over again. Thankfully so, or we would never recover from our
high school crush or losing a partner to divorce or death.

12 signs of love

Love is an emotion, but people do show signs of being in love. You can
tell if someone is in love with you by the things they do for you, or the
words they say, and how they behave with you.

1. Love is generous
In a truly loving relationship, we give to the other without an
expectation of return. We don’t keep an account of who did what for the
other. Giving pleasure to our partner gives us pleasure, too.
2. We feel what our partner feels
The true meaning of love is to feel a sense of joy when we see our
partner happy. When we see that they are sad or depressed, we feel their
blue mood, too. With love comes empathy for the other person’s emotional
state.

3. Love means compromise

The real meaning of love in a relationship is to wilfully compromise your
needs to accommodate your partner’s needs or desires.

But we don’t sacrifice our self in doing this, nor should the other person
require us to sacrifice our self for their gain. That’s not what love is all
about in a relationship; that’s control and abuse.

4. Respect and kindness

What is true love?

Well, when we love, we act respectfully and kindly towards each other.

We do not intentionally hurt or denigrate our partners. When we talk about

them in their absence, it is with such warmth that the listeners can hear the
love in our words. We do not criticize our partners behind their backs.

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5. We act with ethics and morals

Our love for the other person enables us to act morally and ethically, both
with them and in our community. Their presence in our life makes us want
to be better people so that they will continue to admire us.

6. We guard each other’s solitude

With love, we never feel lonely, even when alone. The very thought of
the other person makes us feel as if we have a guardian angel with us at all
times.

7. Their success is yours as well

What is true love in a relationship?

When our partner succeeds at something after a long effort, we beam with
joy as if we were the winner, too. There is no feeling of jealousy or
competition, just pure pleasure at seeing our beloved’s success.

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8. They are always on our mind
Even when separated for work, travel, or other commitments, our thoughts
drift towards them and what they might be doing “right now.”

9. Sexual intimacy deepens

With love, sex becomes sacred. Different from the early days, our
lovemaking now is deep and holy, a true joining of bodies and minds.

10. We feel safe

The presence of love in the relationship allows us to feel protected and

safe as if the other person is a safe harbour for us to come home to. With
them, we feel a sense of security and stability.

11. We feel seen and heard

Our partner sees us for who we are and still loves us. We can show all our
sides, positive and negative, and receive their love unconditionally.
They know who we are at our core. Love allows us to bare our souls and
feel grace in return.

12. Love helps fight without fear

What is love all about? It is a sense of security.

If we are secure in our love relationship, we know we can argue and that it
will not break us apart. We agree to disagree, and we don’t hold grudges
for too long because we don’t like to hold bad feelings towards our
partner.

8 types of love

There are eight different types of love, according to Greek mythology.

These include –
1. Family love or Stodgy
This refers to the type of love we share with our family – parents,
grandparents, siblings, cousins, and others.

2. Marital love or Eros

This is the type of romantic love we feel with a partner who we wish to
marry or have already married.

3. Love by the principle – Agape

This love is not based on emotions but principles. It is referred to as the
love for people we do not like, the love for the unlovable.

4. Brotherly love – Phileo/Philia

As the name suggests, Brotherly love is love for our close ones, who we
hold as dear as family. These people, however, are not our family by
blood.

5. Obsessive Love – Mania

Obsessive love, also known as Mania, is an obsession with one particular
person or a certain way of loving them. Such love hinders your growth and
can interfere with your regular personal and professional life.

6. Enduring love – Pragma

Enduring love is the kind of deep, true love that people in long,
meaningful relationships experience.
7. Playful love – Ludus
Playful love, also called young love, is what you feel when you think the
whole world has conspired for the two of you to be together. This love,
however, comes with an expiry date and might die down with time.

8. Self-love – Philautia
This is the type of love that has been talked about quite a bit, especially
recently. It talks about appreciation and care for yourself before you set
out to give it to someone else.

Impact of being in love

Love is a very powerful emotion. Therefore, it can have both positive and
negative impacts on us. These effects of love can range from physical,
emotional, and even psychological. True feelings of love can really change
us.
The positive impact of love
Love is known to have a very positive impact on our well-being, body, and
mind. Some positive impacts of love include –

▪ Reduced risk of heart diseases

▪ Less fatality risk due to heart attacks
▪ Healthy habits
▪ Increased chances of a long and healthy life
▪ Lower stress levels
▪ Reduced risk of mental health issues like depression.

The negative impact of love

Unhealthy, unrequited love and bad relationships can negatively impact
your body, mind, and well-being.

The negative impacts of love can be as follows.

▪ Increased risk of heart diseases

▪ Spiked risk of heart attacks
▪ High levels of stress
▪ Slower disease recovery
▪ Poor mental health

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Love and mental health

As mentioned in the impacts of love, love can have both a positive and
negative impact on people’s mental health.

The feelings of unconditional love, non-judgment, independence, and

security that come with a healthy relationship can boost self-esteem and
confidence. It also reduces stress, which is a common denominator for
various mental health conditions such as anxiety or depression.

On the flip side, bad relationships that are toxic from the beginning or turn
toxic with time can lead to insecurities that develop deeper than just the
relationship and affect a person’s mental health and future relationships.

The feelings of not being good enough, not doing things right, being
unable to meet expectations can make one feel less of themselves. People
leaving without explanations, cheating, and lying can give rise to
abandonment issues that last longer than just the relationship.
To further understand the difference between healthy and unhealthy
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How to practice love

As mentioned above, love is an amalgamation of various factors and
feelings. To practice love healthily and make the people in our lives feel
loved, we have to be open to love.

Having said that, there is no sure-shot step-by-step guide on how to

practice love, but these points may help.

▪ Be more compassionate, take care of the people you love

▪ Be vulnerable, let your guard down and open up to your
partner/parent/sibling
▪ Be willing to accept your flaws
▪ Accept your mistakes and realize how they affect the other person
▪ Apologize
▪ Forgive the people you love when you can tell they are genuinely
sorry
▪ Listen to your loved ones
▪ Prioritize your time with them
▪ Make sure you are there for the big days
▪ Reciprocate their words, gestures, and feelings
▪ Show affection
▪ Appreciate them
How to nurture love

As much as love is an emotion, a feeling, and happens to evolve naturally,

people in relationships must work towards nurturing love.

What is love all about in a relationship?

It is a mix of compassion, care, understanding, and various other factors,

which need to be developed over time.

Here are some tips on cultivating love in relationships:

1. Practice love-kindness meditation

Love-kindness meditation is a technique used to improve interpersonal

relationships.

The premise of the practice is to think about your loved ones while
meditating, focusing on warm feelings, and wishing for their well-being
and happiness.
2. Communication
Communication is one of the key factors in a healthy relationship. Healthy
communication, where you listen to your partner, and speak about your
needs and wants can help you go a long way.

With communication, the risk of misunderstandings is drastically reduced.

It also avoids unrealistic and unmet expectations, which can sometimes be
the root cause of a relationship ending.

3. Conflict resolution
Fights among couples, or any people who love each other, are almost
inevitable. However, how we resolve these fights and conflicts reflects
your willingness to nurture love in your relationship.

When people say mean, hurtful things to each other during a fight or do
not respect each other when they disagree with them, it could mean that
they are not in love.

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Why do you love the way you do?

The answer to that question is quite complex. However, the most suitable
answers to “Why do we love the way we do?” are listed below.

1. Personality
Everyone is unique and has a way they live their lives. This comprises
their personalities. Some people love too deeply, are sensitive to other
people’s needs, and always put their hearts over their heads.

Other people, however, may be practical and rational. For

them, unconditional love might be tricky to understand.

2. Life experiences
The way we love can be majorly impacted by our life experiences. People
who have seen sour relationships may love too much or maybe too
guarded because they do not want to be hurt. How dear someone holds
people can depend on their childhood, family, and other experiences while
growing up.