Til We Meet Again

by: smolmidoring

Present time: Summer of 2024

There was never a day that is not productive for me, especially since that day. I keep myself busy
all the time with surgeries, out patients, and helping my residents on their thesis. Browsing
through my books — studying is what I do — never in my life I hated reading. One thing caught
my eyes— it's my Brain Hemorrhage book that looks bulked; maybe it's the reminders of what I
should do then or maybe some food wrappings? Looking to that book, it's neither of the two
'maybes'.
It is a three-coffee holder with Ikjun's writing way back 2021.

"The surgery will be over in the evening. see you later~ <3"
"This is the version with one (espresso) shot.”
“If you’re not sleepy, this one is decaffeinated.”

Those were the days, I smiled. I closed my eyes as I'm re-living those magical moments— coffee
and Ikjun. Every day with Ikjun is the happiest days of my life.

THROWBACK: 3 years ago (April 20, 2021)

None of my friends, except Seokhyung, believed that Ikjun and I started dating; eventually, they
believed us when Ikjun gave me a smack kiss on the lips. Junwan shouted after staring at us for
30 seconds straight, he made a big chaos on my office, as usual. Jungwon and Seokhyung, on the
other hand, keep glancing at each other, then on us, then at each other again, until it sinks into
them. Seokhyung started to laugh as if he's watching NJTW and Jungwon brought back 'Andrea'
that time as he did a sign of the cross.

Ikjun held my hand in front of them— Junwan cannot keep on shouting and shouted "I thought
we're family here?" and everyone laughed. I can't believe for 22 years, I handled their dorkness.

I then excused myself to prepare for my incoming surgery; that was actually half a lie to excuse
myself from their totally nonsense questions.
At midnight, I just finished a 14-hour-long surgery and it is already 2:40 in the morning. I was
waiting for Ikjun at the hospital's cafe as he insisted on picking me up. As I waited for him,
Seokmin keeps me company and keeps on bugging me about how I said Ikjun and I were just
friends when they were drinking. I didn't lie that time, we're just friends because we're both
scared.

ring ring
ring ring

He keeps on asking me but I interrupted him to answer Ikjun's call.

"Songhwaya~" Ikjun with a sweet tone really made me blush.

"I'm here at the cafe with Seokmin. I ordered you a coffee." I answered.
"Okay, see you in a bit." a goofy voice of Ikjun like he's a kid.
"See you and drive safe, my love" as I said that, I ended the call immediately because I got so shy
and I totally forgot that Seokmin's with me.

I've waited for Ikjun to come as he said he's coming in a bit.

April 23, 2021……….

I was preparing my white dress— knee-length, bodily-fit, and long sleeves— a beautiful dress
I've picked myself to look extra pretty today. It is just a simple yet elegant dress. I've put a light
make up that matches my white dress with the rose gold ring Ikjun gave me and a necklace with
a simple three dots on it to finish up my look.
I saw the white flowers that I will bring for him, I didn't help but to smile and feel loved. I
remembered how Ikjun loved flowers and even have thousands of it in his gallery.
I get in my car, played 'Someday', put my GPS, and went my way.

We’ll meet again someday

No one knows where we’re going
We’ll meet again someday
I sing along with all my heart in this painful yet beautiful song.

5 minutes later, I'm finally in the destination I needed to go. I can't keep myself up, I'm shaking. I
stayed for 5 more minutes sitting in the car, thinking of how should I overcome it. I was just
observing Junwan, Seokhyung, and Jungwon, they were just standing there, probably waiting for
me. Jungwon sees me in the car and went to me.

"Are you ready?" Jungwon asked with a calm and worried voice. He knows I'm nervous.

I didn't respond. I just looked at him for a second and gave him a genuine smile. He then guided
me towards the entrance.

The boys— Jungwon, Junwan, and Seokhyung entered first as I said I can do it alone.

Looking at the entrance of the church, I was trembling, mixed emotions running through my
body. I closed my eyes and assured myself that it's time.

I entered the church with the white flowers, everyone was looking at me. I cannot hear a single
thing; all I can see is how many people are there, looking at me.

I keep walking. One step at a time.

As I get closer to the altar, it seems clear to me. I see Ikjun standing there in a white tuxedo, neat
hair, and flowers on his pocket, waiting for me, smiling like a genuinely happy child— that was
how my brain tricks me.

Closer and closer, all I hear is people sobbing. I look at the boys, and they're trying not to cry for
me.
One step closer
.
.
.
.
.
And I'm front of the love of my life, Lee Ikjun. Laying on a white casket.
Lifeless.
Breathless, Lee Ikjun.
I gave him the white flowers, in the glass of his casket. I stared at him for seconds, minutes, i
don't know. Memorizing each part of his face, looking at him for the last time. Tears are falling
down continuously in my face like it's an open faucet, a broken faucet.
"We'll meet again someday, Ikjun." I whispered to his casket while tears keep on falling.
"I love you so much it hurts." that was the last words I gave to him before Iksun, Uju, his parents,
the boys, and I closed his casket.

April 20, 2021......... (continuation)

I've been waiting for too long for Ikjun to come. Seokmin already left for his rounds and I was
just sitting alone there. I was thinking that something came up so I called him. It's been 30
minutes since that call.

ring ring
ring ring
ring ring
No one answered. I started to panick as Ikjun never missed my calls.
ring ring
ring ring
He finally answered my call. "Ikjuna~ Where are you? Is everything okay?" I asked out of
anxiousness.
Someone answered, but it is not Ikjun. It is a male's voice "Are you his guardian? It's the Yulje's
paramedic. The phone's owner got into an accident"

My heart dropped as my tears begun to fall.

"Hello ma'am?" the paramedic keeps on talking.

"Hello? Are you still there?" he keeps on asking but I can't say a thing.

Everything is suddenly blurred, I can't hear a thing, it's only just the tingling sound that I can
hear.

Then I passed out.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I woke up on the ER's bed with Seokhyung in my side. "Where's Ikjun?" I asked him.

Seokhyung just stares at me with his puppy eyes, trying not to fall a bit of tears.

"Tell me.... Please." my voice cracked as I started bawling my eyes, crying endlessly. He hugged
me "He's still in the trauma room. They're trying their best." he answered and started crying too.

I pulled off my IV and run towards the trauma room where I saw Ikjun laying on the bed with
blood all over his body. Dr. Bong looked at me and for a while as he said "Songhwa's here."

I was so scared to look at Ikjun in that state, but I saw him smiled when he heard my name. I
slide my hand into his and held his hand.
"Songhwaya~" ikjun said in a cracking and weak voice. I held his hand firmly as my respond
while looking at him, trying not to cry.

"Sorry."

"Sorry for making you wait."

"Sorry that it took me 22 years to say it."

Ikjun tried his best to speak all of that with his weak and trembling voice. The last thing he said
to me was....

"I love you since 1999, my best friend, my greatest love." his eyes started to fall tears.

I cannot say a thing. I just held his hand until he closes his eyes and kissed his forehead.

We stayed like that for an hour. Me holding a lifeless Ikjun's hand while caressing his hair.

Back to the present: Summer of 2024

I realized myself crying again with what happened 3 years ago. How could I forget the one who
loved me wholeheartedly, the one who never crossed the line, the one who were there for me
every time.
I keep staring at the coffee holder with his notes for me.
I sighed.
I leaned on my office chair as I see the pictures in my desk— with the boys and a solo with
Ikjun.
“’Til we meet again, my love” I whispered into the thin air as I close my eyes and a drop of tear
falls down.
---------------------------------------------------- The End ---------------------------------------------------