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9 Exhilarating Ways to Be True to Yourself (Even When You’re Scared)
Let’s face it: pretending to be someone you’re not is one of the most disturbing
experiences in the world.
And realizing that you’ve pretended to be someone else is arguably even more distressing.
But what do we do once we realize we’re not being honest with ourselves?
All too often people make a big drama about expressing “authenticity,” when in reality, being true to yourself is quite simple. But it isn’t
for the fainthearted. In order to be true to yourself, you need courage. However, thankfully courage is a source of energy we all have
access to no matter how insecure we feel.
If you feel like you’re living a lie, forgive yourself. It’s OK! So many of us feel the same way. In fact, learning how to be true to yourself is
all a part of the human growth experience. When we come into this life we are practically destined to live inauthentic lives at some point.
Often, we need to first discover who we’re not being authentic in order to uncover who we truly are deep inside. So don’t worry. There’s
nothing “wrong” with you. You aren’t at fault. But now that you have woken up out of the dream, it’s time to do some serious inner work.
Others of us feel smothered by the weight of our social masks and responsibilities, resulting in states of chronic anxiety and insomnia.
And sometimes, we feel a heavy numbness inside that swallows up our lives in depression.
Realizing that we’re not walking the right path can come gradually, like day fading into night, or all of a sudden, like an avalanche
consuming everything around us. What did that realization feel like to you?
For me, the realization that I was living a complete lie dawned on me slowly, across the span of a year. I felt increasingly confused,
disoriented, anxious, depressed, and my mind spiraled into a very dark place. Thankfully I managed to get out of that place (and I’ll
share how I did that near the end of this article). Ultimately, my decision to be true to myself resulted in burning bridges with my entire
fundamentalist Christian family– but the leap into the unknown was completely and utterly worth it. I have never felt happier, more whole
or more fulfilled!
Think you might be living a lie? Here are some red flags to look out for:
Stop and reflect on these signs. How many resonated with you? The more signs you said an internal “yes” to, the more likely you’re
living an inauthentic life.
Each and every one of us has a destiny, a true life path, a deeply significant soul mission. When we innocently listen to others and try to
conform our lives to their expectations, we come out of alignment with our ultimate life purpose. It’s not that we choose to deliberately
walk the wrong path, instead, our fractured lives are the result of unconsciously conditioned autopilot living.
We are taught since childhood to listen to our “elders” and be obedient to society. But although fitting in helped us to learn the lesson
we needed as children, pleasing others becomes an outdated pattern of living in adulthood. As adults, we need to learn how to stand on
our feet and make decisions that come from our heart and soul, rather than from what others (our parents, friends, lovers or culture) tell
us – this is true adulthood.
If you are craving to connect with your soul and be true to yourself, here are some good pieces of advice (and don’t worry, you can do
these things even if you feel terrified):
8. Forgive yourself
Does a part of you feel like you’re unworthy of living a completely full and happy life? Forgive this self-loathing part of you. If you find it
hard to forgive, forgive your lack of forgiveness. Letting go of any anger that you hold towards yourself will help you to find the freedom
to make real change and live a life that feels authentic. Don’t blame yourself for the predicament you find yourself in: you were simply
doing the best you could with the knowledge and level of awareness you had. Mistakes are a normal part of life. And really … are there
any mistakes? Or are there just opportunities to learn and grow? Now that you’ve woken up you are blessed with the ability to make
conscious decisions. What a relief!
***
Coming out of the closet, revealing your true colors, and listening to the call of your soul can all feel terrifying at first. But in the end, the
longest relationship you will ever have is with yourself. You are with yourself 24/7, so learning how to be true to yourself is vital if you’re
to live a vibrant and fulfilling life.
Finally, don’t forget to laugh. Be playful. Laughter is good medicine. When you stop taking yourself so seriously, you can enjoy the
dance of life just as it is, without all the drama. So don’t forget to enjoy the ride!
If you have any more suggestions on how to be true to yourself – or life-changing stories – please share in the comments!