Ian Jay Cailing

BSE – VED IV

List of things that is bothering me:

Family
School requirements
Self-Boost
Community obligation
Relationship
Top 2 of things bothering me
Self-boost
School requirements
3 specific things
Self-boost
o I am having problems lately dealing with doubts in this field because I can
see myself very far from others.
o I feel like I am lacking so many things that a teacher must possess.
o Sometimes, I don’t know any more if I can be a good and effective teacher
which I must be.
School requirements
o I have problems managing my time because of so many things flashing
into my mind.
o I am having a hard time balancing community obligation and my school
activities.
o Having a hard time dealing with personal matters and school.

Inside out reflection:

"Are you all right?" A question that could lead me to lie about my feelings or to stay true.
I don't want to jeopardize other people's help when I desperately needed it. I tend to
push them away by saying, "I'm fine," even though I'm not. I'm not doing well because
I'm afraid of being rejected. I'm not happy because I don't want to be disappointed. I'm
not feeling well, but I don't want them to see me cry. Who would want to hear about my
problems? Sadness robbed me of my happiness. I despise being alone, weak, and
afraid. But by the time I needed someone the most, no one was there. I was suffocated
by hatred and self-pity by the time I needed fresh air. I was occupied by sadness and I
thought it was going to consume me but on the contrary, it lightens me up. Just like in
the short clip, "Embracing sadness is an essential part of the healing process". I was
enlightened and caught up. Emotions and feelings are want makes my life in balance.
There is sadness, joy, love, and everything in between. I just needed to embrace it and
be true to what I am feeling. Indeed, my feelings are valid and it is okay to be
vulnerable. Depression is not a laughing matter. As much as others want to help me, I
need to help myself.