the little book of

shadow work
by Kemi Marie
 Copyright © 2021 by Melanated Momma LLC

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof

may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever
without the express written permission of the publisher
except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

Printed in the United States of America

First Printing, 2021

Los Angeles, CA
www.melanatedmomma.com
this is a journal
for you to explore
your
authentic self
 into the shadows
“Bad faith…the phenomenon in which human
beings, under pressure from social forces, adopt
false values and disown their innate freedom, hence
acting inauthentically.” —Jean Paul Sarte, Being And
Nothingness. Jean-Paul Sartre called it mauvaise foi,
also to be known as ‘bad faith’ or a devotion to living
inauthentically.

To Sartre, living inauthentically means denying the

natural freedom and autonomy life grants us in
exchange for the rituals and structures created by
others as a means to control people. It is said these
structures restrict a humans natural ability to live
and exist freely. It reduces humans to beings of
facticity, stuck under labels, concrete definitions of
self and unable to escape into their own desires and
pursuits because of the projections of others.
 into the shadows

To live authentically, one must travel a lone road of

autonomy. To live authentically, one must unpack all
thats been thrown onto them, wander into the
depths of healing in order to align with the most
important part of oneself: the spirit. The spirit is
what people have when they don’t have anything.
Connecting to the spirit allows people to heal and
live a prosperous, authentic life. Traveling into the
depths of the soul means walking through shadows,
running into walls and cobwebs just to access the
light. The road to healing and reuniting with the
authentic soul is a harsh road. It is a road less
travelled.
 into the shadows
Shadow work is looking at the meaning behind
unconscious emotions, responses, and actions taken
in situations. It is every impulse, every repressed
emotion, and everything you'd typically feel
ashamed to feel. While shadow work is digging into
the darkness, sometimes that introspection comes
from good emotions and good responses.

Theres a shadow behind everything, even the things

we deem as "good." Shadow work doesn't always
have to be heavy. Typically the root is heavy, but
sometimes the surface level shadow work is asking
yourself: "Why am I such a perfectionist?"

Sometimes its digging deeper into why emotional

intimacy and attention in relationships is so
important to you. It doesn't always have to be an
inquiry into toxic traits. Shadow work can be an
inquiry into the good things too. However, the
purpose is to always reveal unconscious behaviors
and core beliefs that inform who you are today.
 into the shadows
Much of shadow work requires introspection. it
requires journaling and looking at seemingly surface
level problems, issues, as well as feelings and
analyzing them so that you understand the exact
reason you react in the way you do.

Shadow work is recognizing that anger towards a

partner for taking too long to text back is not an
issue they need to fix but an unhealthy attachment
style that you need to fix. Shadow work is
recognizing that people draining your energy with
their needs shows a need for stronger boundaries
within self.

Shadow work is recognizing that the world is a

mirror. Shadow work is recognizing that life doesn’t
just happen. Every action and non-action that you
take results in either a healthy or unhealthy
response from the world. Shadow work asks, “what
does this mean about me on a deeper level?”
 into the shadows
It is not to blame oneself. it is simply to become
aware so that maybe next time you set more
boundaries. Maybe instead of getting upset at their
lack of response, you turn inward and take steps to
soothe other issues. Look to the shadow to find the
lessons. Look to the shadow to see how you can be a
better you.

Where does this come from?

Why is it popping up?
What is the lesson here?
What do I need to work on?
How can I change this problem?
How can I support myself?
What’s the core, root issue here?

These are the questions we ask ourselves when

pursuing the shadow.
 The 5 sections:

identity
inner child

philosophy spirituality

vulnerability
Vulnerability
affirm:

I accept vulnerability as a

strength
embracing my emotions as

a source of empowerment.
 Vulnerability Questions
1. How do you view sadness and why? How do you express it?
2. How do you view anger and why? How do you express it?
3. How do you express joy and why?
4. When you made mistakes as a child, were you rejected, punished or not
forgiven? How do you think this impacts your ability to forgive others now?
5. What is love outside of any pain attached to it?
6. What frightens you the most?
7. How do you communicate your emotions?
8. How would you like to communicate your emotions?
9. What emotion do you feel most comfortable with?

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10. What emotion do you feel least comfortable with?
11. Define vulnerability and how it takes form in your life.
12. How can you find strength in vulnerability? What does strength mean in
terms of vulnerability?
13. In what ways can you effectively move through emotion?
14. How often do you ask for help?
15. How does saying "no" make you feel?
16. What are you letting go of?
17. What do you need to forgive yourself for? Write a letter forgiving yourself
for any undesirable traits or aspects of self that you'd like to let go.
18. Write down how you are feeling. Ask yourself what message this feeling is
trying to convey?
19. I show myself compassion by...
20. I show myself love by...
21. I show myself kindness by...
22. Are you more comfortable with giving or receiving?
23. How do you implement boundaries?
24. What does vulnerability look like to you?
How do you view sadness and why? How do you express it?
How do you view anger and why? How do you express it?
How do you express joy and why?
When you made mistakes as a child, were you rejected, punished or not forgiven? How do you
think this impacts your ability to forgive others now?
What is love outside of any pain attached to it?
What frightens you the most?
How do you communicate your emotions?
How would you like to communicate your emotions?
What emotion do you feel most comfortable with?
Define vulnerability and how it takes form in your life.
How can you find strength in vulnerability? What does strength mean in terms of
vulnerability?
In what ways can you effectively move through emotion?
How often do you ask for help?
How does saying "no" make you feel?
What are you letting go of?
What do you need to forgive yourself for? Write a letter forgiving yourself for any undesirable
traits or aspects of self that you'd like to let go.
Write down how you are feeling. Ask yourself what message this feeling is trying to convey?
I show myself compassion by...
I show myself love by...
I show myself kindness by...
Are you more comfortable with giving or receiving?
How do you implement boundaries?
What does vulnerability look like to you?
Identity
affirm:

i open myself up to new ideas

and
ways of existing in harmony with

my higher self.
 Identity Questions
1. “I know I’m happy when ______”
2. “I know I’m stressed when ____”
3. “I know I don’t want something when ______”
4. “I know I do want something when _____”
5. What characteristics, lifestyles, identities have been assigned to or assumed of
you? i.e being strong, hardworking, gender, sexuality, financial orientation, etc.
6. Do you feel like you’re taking an active role in your life and making the choices
you want to make?
7. What judgment of yourself do you also judge others for?
8. Whats a quality you see in others that you'd like to inherit?
9. Whats a quality of self that you offer to others?

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10. Are you being who you want to be?
11. Who are you when you live purely from your mind? From your body? How can
you balance or integrate the tool?
12. Does being good at, better than, or visibly recognized allow you to feel
powerful?
13. In what ways do you assert yourself?
14. In what spaces do you feel powerful?
15. How much of your confidence/self worth is centered on the recognition of
others or the merits you have?
16. How do you cultivate confidence?
17. What privileges of dominant culture do you have?
18. In what ways did dominant culture ostracize you?
19. Write a standards list of everything you require.
20. What would you like to improve about yourself?
21. How have you already improved yourself over the years?
22. In what ways have you shamed and repressed yourself? Why? How can you
release this shame?
23. In what ways have your parents influenced or drove you to who you are today?
24. What would you like to be recognized for?
25. Who are you when no one is watching?
“I know I’m happy when ______”
I know I’m stressed when ____”
“I know I don’t want something when ______”
“I know I do want something when _____”
What characteristics, lifestyles, identities have been assigned to or assumed of you? i.e being
strong, hardworking, gender, sexuality, financial orientation, etc.
Do you feel like you’re taking an active role in your life and making the choices you want to
make?
What judgment of yourself do you also judge others for?
Whats a quality you see in others that you'd like to inherit?
Whats a quality of self that you offer to others?
Are you being who you want to be?
Who are you when you live purely from your mind? From your body? How can you balance or
integrate the tool?
In what ways do you assert yourself?
Does being good at, better than, or visibly recognized allow you to feel powerful?
In what spaces do you feel powerful?
How much of your confidence/self worth is centered on the recognition of others or the merits
you have?
How do you cultivate confidence?
What privileges of dominant culture do you have?
In what ways did dominant culture ostracize you?
Write a standards list of everything you require.
What would you like to improve about yourself?
How have you already improved yourself over the years?
In what ways have you shamed and repressed yourself? Why? How can you release this
shame?
In what ways have your parents influenced or drove you to who you are today?
What would you like to be recognized for?
Who are you when no one is watching?
Philosophy
affirm:

i am capable of achieving

greatness
as aligned with my definition

of success.
Personal Philosophy Questions
1. How do you define wisdom?
2. What is the meaning of life?
3. What beliefs are you committed to that are beneficial for you?
4. What are you committed/attached to that isn’t benefitting you?
5. How do you personally define devotion and dedication? Who taught you
this? Is this what you believe?
6. What is pleasure in your mind?
7. What is power?
8. What is true strength?

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9. What does it mean for you to take up space?
10. How do you hold space for others?
11. How comfortable are you with not knowing?
12. Define love outside of other feelings you've attached to it
13. How do you define God and why?
14. How do you define what is "good" and what is "bad?
15. In what ways have the ideas of good versus bad contributed to personal
feelings of guilt, shame, imperfection or undesirability?
16. How is confidence displayed?
17. What determines your happiness? Can you do nothing and still
experience happiness and contentment?
18. Do you think there can be pleasure if pain doesn't exist? Could there be
happiness if sadness doesnt exist? Good if bad doesn't exist?
19. Why do you use a spoon to eat tomato soup, but drink orange juice from
a cup?
20. How often do you say 'yes' when you really mean 'no? Why?
21. What determines your personal worth and value?
22. Write a list of main principles and beliefs that guide your life.
How do you define wisdom?
What is the meaning of life?
What beliefs are you committed to that are beneficial for you?
What are you committed/attached to that isn’t benefitting you?
How do you personally define devotion and dedication? Who taught you this? Is this what you
believe?
What is pleasure in your mind?
What is power?
What is true strength?
What does it mean for you to take up space?
How do you hold space for others?
How comfortable are you with not knowing?
Define love outside of other feelings you've attached to it
How do you define God and why?
How do you define what is "good" and what is "bad?
In what ways have the ideas of good versus bad contributed to personal feelings of guilt,
shame, imperfection or undesirability?
How is confidence displayed?
What determines your happiness? Can you do nothing and still experience happiness and
contentment?
Do you think there can be pleasure if pain doesn't exist? Could there be happiness if sadness
doesnt exist? Good if bad doesn't exist?
Why do you use a spoon to eat tomato soup, but drink orange juice from a cup?
How often do you say 'yes' when you really mean 'no? Why?
What determines your personal worth and value?
Write a list of main principles and beliefs that guide your life.
Spirituality
affirm:

my connection with source

is an infinitely
deep well of universal love

and blessings.
 Spirituality Questions
1. What does spirituality mean to you?
2. What did your spirit come here to do?
3. What does your self care look like outside of material things or
purchasing items?
4. What does your daily self care look like?
5. Are the desires of your soul in alignment with what society/others desire
for you?
6. What are the desires of your soul?
7. What does your body need most right now?
8. What does your mind need most right now?

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9. What do your spirit need most right now?
10. How are you supporting yourself spiritually?
11. In whats ways can you cultivate growth from a positive lens rather than
a fear based perspective?
12. In what ways do your spirit guides connect with you?
13. What does it mean to trust and believe in the power of the Universe?
14. What does it look like for you to "let go and let God"?
15. What patterns, habits, good and bad characteristics did you inherit from
those that came before you? (ancestors, parents, etc)
16. What generational curses are you breaking?
17. What generational strengths are you inheriting?
18. What spiritual gifts do you have? What are you meant to do with these
gifts?
19. Write a list of 5 things you've always felt drawn to or connected with.
20. What methods do you use to set intention as you rise each day?
21. How can you be more intentional with everything you do?
22. What do you believe is your purpose?
23. What makes you feel purposeful?
24. What is a sacred space in your life? How do you protect this space?
What does spirituality mean to you?
What did your spirit come here to do?
What does your self care look like outside of material things or purchasing items?
What does your daily self care look like?
Are the desires of your soul in alignment with what society/others desire for you?
What are the desires of your soul?
What does your body need most right now?
What does your mind need most right now?
What do your spirit need most right now?
How are you supporting yourself spiritually?
In whats ways can you cultivate growth from a positive lens rather than a fear based
perspective?
In what ways do your spirit guides connect with you?
What does it mean to trust and believe in the power of the Universe?
What does it look like for you to "let go and let God"?
What patterns, habits, good and bad characteristics did you inherit from those that came
before you? (ancestors, parents, etc)
What generational curses are you breaking?
What generational strengths are you inheriting?
What spiritual gifts do you have? What are you meant to do with these gifts?
Write a list of 5 things you've always felt drawn to or connected with.
What methods do you use to set intention as you rise each day?
How can you be more intentional with everything you do?
What do you believe is your purpose?
What makes you feel purposeful?
What is a sacred space in your life? How do you protect this space?
Inner Child
affirm:

i am capable of achieving

greatness
as aligned with my definition

of success.
 Inner Child Questions
1. What was your name? Did you have any cool nicknames? A name that made
you feel warm and cozy, comfortable and held?
2. Imagine what you wore as a child. Imagine your outfits. Describe what you
used to wear. What drew you to those clothes?
3. Tell me about your favorite birthday? What made this one so special?
4. What age did you really look forward to? What's one thing in general you
looked forward to?
5. What was your favorite show? What was your favorite character? Why?
6. How were your friends? Did they treat you nicely? Were they inclusive? How
did they support you?
7. How did your inner child view love? Was love a magical endeavor with many

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expectations or a daunting feat that symbolized desirability?
8. What were your favorite pastimes?
9. Did your inner child play any card games? Hand sliding games? How did
those games make you feel on the inside?
10. What part of you did you sacrifice to please others?
11. Who supported you when you expressed hurt or pain, during rough times?
12. Envision a time or an activity that brought you overwhelming joy, happiness
and fun. Journal about it.
13. Growing up, was there anything that you’ve tried to shut down, hide, or
change about yourself?
14. How much do you understand about your parents and the world? Do you
wish to know more or less? What type of impact does it have on you to know
what you do?
15. If you could go back, what would you want your parents or the adults around
you to know about you? If you could fully speak up, what would you say?
16. How did you, your inner child, most want to be loved and supported?
17. What were you searching for? Time, attention, activity, stability, security?
18. How can you love and honor your inner child every day? What would they
want you to do?
19. If your inner child could send a message to your adult self, what would your
inner child say?
20. If your adult self could send a message to your inner child, what would it say?
What was your name? Did you have any cool nicknames? A name that made you feel warm
and cozy, comfortable and held?
Imagine what you wore as a child. Imagine your outfits. Describe what you used to wear.
Tell me about your favorite birthday? What made this one so special?
What age did you really look forward to? What's one thing in general you looked forward to?
What was your favorite show? What was your favorite character? Why?
How were your friends? Did they treat you nicely? Were they inclusive? How did they support
you?
How did your inner child view love? Was love a magical endeavor with many expectations or a
daunting feat that symbolized desirability?
What were your favorite pastimes?
Did your inner child play any card games? Hand sliding games? How did those games make
you feel on the inside?
What part of you did you sacrifice to please others?
Who supported you when you expressed hurt or pain, during rough times? How do you
support yourself now?
Envision a time or an activity that brought you overwhelming joy, happiness and fun. Journal
about it.
Growing up, was there anything that you’ve tried to shut down, hide, or change about
yourself?
How much do you understand about your parents and the world? Do you wish to know more
or less? What type of impact does it have on you to know what you do?
If you could go back, what would you want your parents or the adults around you to know
about you? If you could fully speak up, what would you say?
How did you, your inner child, most want to be loved and supported?
What were you searching for? Time, attention, activity, stability, security?
How can you love and honor your inner child every day? What would they want you to do?
If your inner child could send a message to your adult self, what would your inner child say?
If your adult self could send a message to your inner child, what would it say?
 Kemi Marie, also known as Melanated
Momma, is a writer, holistic teacher, and
guide for the collective. Since embarking
on their path, Kemi has launched various
classes, oracle decks, and a new spiritual
school to help guide the collective. Learn
more at melanatedmomma.com

The Little Book of Shadow Work is a 140 page shadow

work journal including 5 different topics,:

Vulnerability
Identity
Personal Philosophy
Inner Child
& Spirituality

With over 115 questions and prompts, The book of

shadow work is the perfect aid to your self discovery
journey.

Allow transformative thinking and self growth to

assist you on your journey. Embrace the shadows to
see more light.