Parents and children’s communication patterns in social

emotional formation of early childhood

N.Hidayah
Pendidikan Luar Sekolah, Universitas Negeri Surabaya (nuzulul.20004@mhs.unesa.ac.id)
G.D. Lestari
Pendidikan Luar Sekolah, Universitas Negeri Surabaya (gunartilestari@unesa.ac.id)
I.K.A.J. Artha
Pendidikan Luar Sekolah, Universitas Negeri Surabaya (ketutatmadja@unesa.ac.id)

ABSTRACT: The purpose of this study is to provide a study of the communication patterns of
parents and children in social emotional formation, especially for early childhood. The method
used in this research is a literature study, which begins with problem identification to analysis
and discussion. As for the results of this study which from various communication patterns,
good and effective communication patterns are communication patterns that contain good val-
ues, children are able to empathize and sympathize, children have honesty, children have high
consistency, and open interactive communication between children and parents.

Keywords: Parent-Child Communication, Social Emotional Formation, Early Childhood

The role of early childhood education in determining child development and preparing chil -
dren to be ready to enter the world of higher education. Early childhood education is basic edu-
cation that is held with an emphasis on the growth and development of children (Mursid, 2015).
Early childhood education aims to lay the foundation for the development of behavior, knowl -
edge, skills and creativity so that children can develop their potential.
According to Mansur in (Wardhani, 2004) revealed that early childhood between the ages of
0-6 years where children are in a very unique process of change and development. It is said to
be unique where children have growth and development (fine motor coordination and gross mo-
toric), intelligence (thinking power, creativity and religion) and special language and communi-
cation according to the level of growth and development of children.
It is concluded that children are said to be early childhood if the age range is 0-6 years, each
child is said to be unique because children have intelligence, social and emotional, growth and
development, as well as language and communication. Each child's uniqueness in the process of
development and growth has its own level, so every parent must be able to understand the
condition of their child. So that parents can easily educate children according to their
intelligence, desires, or talents and interests.
Child development is an integral part of a scientific paradigm by assuming that the world
view is positivist. Child development has a long tradition in early childhood education, and is
largely based on the field of psychology, particularly developmental psychology and the
interdisciplinary field of children in biology (Soto, 2002). One aspect of early childhood
development, namely social and emotional
Socio-emotional is the behavior and feelings of an individual who relates to other people.
Social-emotional in early childhood is a change in behavior that is accompanied by a pervasive
feeling about early childhood relating to other people. Emotion is an effective experience that
accompanies general inner adjustment and mental and physiological states within the individual,
and also shows an open behavior in him (Baharudin, 2010). The Center for Social-Emotional
Foundations for Early Learning (CSEFEL) reveals that social-emotional is the development of
children at the capacity from birth to the age of 5 years, to form close relationships between
children and adults and peers. Children's social emotions include experiencing, organizing, and
expressing according to the culture and the way the environment is in learning (Ashdown et al.,
2012).
The family is the main and first education for children, because the child's stimulus is first
obtained in the family and also in the child's family spending time. People who know have the
responsibility to pass on good values to their children, values in children can be inherited
through family education. The important role of parents in determining the direction and
personality of the child to be formed. In the pedagogic context, parents are not justified in
letting parents guide and supervise the growth and development of children. Guidance is given
in a clear direction and directs children to the straight path. Education in the family should
provide a basis for children in education and the process of socializing in social life (Hasan,
2009).
In family education, communication between parents and children is no less important,
communication becomes a bridging medium in a relationship between family members.
Without communication, family life will be perfect, so talk, dialogue, and exchange ideas (Dja-
marah, 2004). The quality of communication provided will affect the child's social and
emotional. Good and harmonious family relationships are the main keys in good
communication. The communication needed is interactive communication, in which father,
mother and child are involved in pleasant communication and avoid communication that is
dominant or dominant. Parent-child communication should also be encouraging, caring, and
appreciative. However, there are some parents who use violence in disciplining their children,
forbidding under the pretext of protecting, and also calculating in giving affection under the
pretext of making children independent. The large number of children causes children to be
haunted by fear, lack of confidence and a sense of anxiety. Experience and learning are needed
by children to develop social behavior so that they are well received by the community.
Experience can teach others lessons, and can increase friendship and responsibility for their
actions.
Communication is a process of delivering information to other people, in delivering
information it involves the activity and creativity of those who deliver and who will receive
messages or information and it can be said that communication is the creation of an idea or idea
that aims to be conveyed to informants (Irawan, 2000). Gode quoted by (Wiryanto, 2004)
reveals that the meaning of communication is "it's a process that makes common to or several
what the monopoly of one or some".
Communication patterns are models that have components and are connected to each other in
the form of symbols, have meaning and also have the aim of conveying messages or
information to change individual behavior and the messages or information conveyed can be
easily understood. Communication patterns conveyed by both adults to children and children to
their peers have different patterns or models of communication. The socially oriented parental
communication pattern will significantly affect the child's role as an influencer in making
decisions. Concept-oriented communication patterns will have a positive effect on the role of
children as influencers (Budiman & Tomi, 2016).
Family communication patterns affect the mental development and mindset of children, either
directly or indirectly. Families will function optimally if open communication patterns, mutual
acceptance, support, security, comfort and spiritual life are maintained ((Nurlita & Setyahajoe,
2014).
Several experts express various points of view on family education. According to Mansur,
family education is a process of giving positive values to children's growth and development as
further education (Mansur, 2005). Meanwhile, Abdullah argues that family education is all the
efforts made by the family in terms of habituation and improvisation with the aim of helping the
child's personal development (Abdullah, 2003). So family education is education carried out by
families to provide positive values as the foundation for further child education, family
education in the form of habituation and improvisation with the aim of helping children's
personal development.
The process of parent education in the family has several educational activities, including
physical or physical education of children, intellectual education of children, religious moral
education, social education and emotional education of children. Parents in interacting with
children must be able to display positive behavior patterns, because the behavior patterns of
parents will affect the stimulus for the child himself. One of the processes of parental education
for children is emotional education, because emotions will determine the child's personality for
the future (Yasin, 2008).
Based on the results of an interview with the principal of RA Baitul Muttaqiem on March 9,
2021, the majority of student guardians have different professions, including: civil servants,
teachers, housewives, traders. Thus the role of parents in the family is very important for
children who will affect the lives of children to adulthood. Establishing good communication
between parents and children by looking at the various conditions and backgrounds of parents is
quite difficult, as well as forming a good social emotional child requires a short time, but it
takes a long process and time. Thus, education in the family really needs patience and
sensitivity, especially how parents communicate well which can trigger children's social
emotional development.

RESEARCH METHOD
The method used in this research is a literature study method. The data collected by this
method comes from journals, books and other sources. Literature study is research conducted by
collecting sources through books, papers related to the objectives and problems in research
(Wasriah, 2009). The literature study approach can provide knowledge of the communication
model of parents and children in the social emotional formation of early childhood. Thus the
social emotional development of children is development that involves people who are around
the child, namely parents, family, peers, teachers, and the community, who play a role in the
social emotional development of children by means of children who learn and understand which
behaviors are good and bad. which is not good.

RESULTS AND DISCUSSION

Parents must be responsible for the social emotional and mental formation of children, parents
must also give attention, protection and security to children. Thus parents must maintain good
relations with children, in a family good communication is a must that cannot be avoided.
Good communication between parents and children will create harmonious relationships in the
family. Building good communication can be done with various patterns. The communication
pattern that is applied will affect the child's social emotional and psychological development.
Good and effective communication patterns are very important in family and social life. The
following are some of the communication patterns used in providing information:
a. Permissive communication pattern
Permissive communication pattern is a communication pattern in which parents act
indifferent or don't care what happens to their children and these parents give freedom
to children (Samsu, 2000).
b. Authorative communication pattern
Authorative communication patterns tend to impose their will, where this type of
 communication pattern parents act more as a supervisor (control) over everything about
their children. used by PAUD children, kindergarten children, and used for elementary
school children with certain cases (Djamarah, 2014).
c. Laissez-faire communication pattern
This lasses-faire communication pattern can be implemented for all age levels of
children, where this communication pattern is not based on rules and parents provide
open freedom for children and with little parental intervention (Djamarah, 2014).
d. The fathernalistic communication pattern
The father-natistic communication pattern is a fatherly communication pattern, which
means that parents act as fathers to their children in educating, nurturing, teaching,
guiding and advising (Djamarah, 2014).
e. Self-melting communication patterns
This self-melting communication pattern is a type of leadership in which parents
prioritize cooperation and combine themselves with their children (Djamarah, 2014).
f. Pioneer style communication pattern
This pioneer style communication pattern, parents are always pioneers where parents
provide examples of kindness for children and families (Djamarah, 2014).
g. Manipulation communication pattern
This manipulation communication pattern, parents always do tricks, twist reality and
give rules to children, with the aim that children do what parents want (Djamarah,
2014).
h. Communication patterns so that they are slow as long as they are safe
This communication pattern parents are always careful about what they do. This old
man has the principle that even if it is slow as long as it is safe and even if it is slow, let
it jump far ahead (Djamarah, 2014).
i. Role switching communication patterns
In this type, parents give authority or provide opportunities for children to develop tasks
or roles with parents who continue to provide direction, supervision, and facilitation
(Djamarah, 2014).
j. Selfish communication pattern
This communication pattern is said to be selfish because each child's work is given or
assessed with a material, with the aim of moving the child to do something the parents
want (Djamarah, 2014).
k. Selfless communication pattern
This communication pattern parents raise children by teaching sincerity in words,
behavior and deeds, here it is said to be selfless because whatever they do, they expect
rewards or gains, except for the pleasure of God (Djamarah, 2014).
l. Consultant communication pattern
This communication pattern parents act as good listeners or a place for children's
complaints, in this communication parents act as consultants and children as
messengers, this communication both parties are involved in communication (Djama-
rah, 2014).
m. The militaristic pattern of communication
 This pattern acts like commanding, the child must obey any orders from the parents
without any objections, the child must be obedient to the orders and prohibitions of the
parents. In conditions such as threats, dangerous conditions, this type is very
appropriate to use for the safety of children (Djamarah, 2014).
Socio-emotional in early childhood is the behavior and feelings of a child related to other
people. Emotions in early childhood are shown by various responses related to interactions in
the environment (Fadhilah, 2014). Socio-emotional development in children after an early age,
especially for ages 2-4 years, has its own level. There are 3 levels of emotional social
development in early childhood, namely self-awareness, responsibility and others, and levels of
social behavior. According to (Nurjannah, 2017) the socio-emotional development of early
childhood is influenced by several factors, including heredity factors, environmental factors and
general factors.
Basically social emotional abilities in children exist from birth. In fact, every individual has
basic social and emotional, but as children get older and interactions with other people will
affect the social and emotional development of children. Thus it can be said that social
emotional development is influenced by the environment.
In the learning process, children will absorb based on the behavior, assessment, and treatment
of parents, family, peers and the community. Children's learning initially takes place in the
family, so that the family becomes a determining factor in children's social emotional
development. So in this case the communication pattern used by the family, especially parents,
will influence and determine the social and emotional development of children.
Open parent-child communication is one aspect of a good parent-child relationship and plays
an important role in maintaining the family system and child development. Communication also
maintains close family relationships which will contribute to effective quality in maintaining the
relationship between parents in maintaining the relationship between parents and children (Guil-
amo-Ramos et al., 2006; Lee & Wong, 2009;(L. D & C. M, 2009). Open parent-child
communication is one aspect of a good parent-child relationship and plays an important role in
maintaining the family system and child development. Communication also maintains close
family relationships which will make a significant contribution. effective quality in maintaining
the relationship between parents and children.
The use of communication patterns is a description of the interaction between family
members and especially between children and parents. The communication pattern used in the
family is influenced by several factors including economic factors, social factors, living
environment factors, educational factors and beliefs held and will not be separated from cultural
factors, patterns of action, norms, values, and ideas or ideas that are used as symbols to
communicate in a family.
The identity of an individual will be obtained from paying attention and being noticed by
others, and by comparing oneself with others will also increase identity and self-worth. By
using communication, every human being will be easy to share experiences and understand the
experiences of others (Tubbs et al., 1996).

CLOSING
Conclusion
Social and emotional formation in early childhood can be done by maintaining good
relationships and communication between parents and children. Communicative patterns of
parents and children consist of permissive communication patterns, authorative communication
patterns, laissez-faire communication patterns, fathernalistic communication patterns, self-
melting communication patterns, pioneering style communication patterns, manipulation
communication patterns, communication patterns so that they are slow to survive, patterns
selfless communication, selfless communication pattern, militaristic communication pattern.
Each of these communication patterns has its own advantages and disadvantages.

Parents should pay attention to the communication patterns provided. The communication
pattern that is applied will affect the psychological and personality development of a child.
Based on the discussion and explanation above, parents can use effective communication
patterns in forming a good social emotional child.
The results of the study revealed that the family's awareness and understanding of the
importance of communication and the magnitude of its influence on children's social emotional
development is still relatively low. This can be seen from the number of families who do not
know the relationship between family communication and social emotional development and
families, especially parents, still consider it unimportant. Many of us find that parents pay more
attention to their child's cognitive abilities than their emotional abilities. As well as families who
do not have commitments or rules in communicating within the family and concern for anal
social emotional development, so that communication that occurs in the family is only
considered as routine without any meaning for children's social emotional development.
The application of good and positive communication patterns in the family that affects the
social emotional development of children when using communication patterns that have a
culture. Which is where a good communication pattern is characterized by the existence of rules
and freedom, so that the child will pay attention to every behavior and action and also the child
will know the consequences. An atmosphere that is created in a free, responsible manner,
accustomed to living independently, the ability to follow the rules and regulations in society will
also have a good influence on the social emotional development of children
In order to achieve good communication in improving the socio-emotional development of
early childhood, it is necessary to socialize from an early age to families. The socialization
process will be good if it is supported by religious, cultural factors, and also in accordance with
the times. So that children will know good and bad values, sympathy, empathy, selfishness,
honesty, cooperation, consistency, these things will grow in an atmosphere of democratic,
interactive and open communication between parents and children.

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